Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Rolling In It

We pan across the walls of Salem Hospital. Bullet holes everywhere, each one representing a place where deadeye Hope wasn't aiming...

Phillip and Stephanie romp. Stephanie's phone rings. She answers and Patch gives her the bad news about Kayla, "There was an accident. Someone accidentally let Hope have a gun."

Hope grills Bo about his hallucination, "You lied, and now I'm burdened with knowing I shot your sister. You could've stopped this."

Patch asks to go in and see Kayla. Lexie tells him he can go in, "But she's kind of out of it. Hope really pumped her full of lead and now she's acting holier than thou."

EJ has given everyone the night off so he and Nicole can spend some time alone, "Just you... and me... and baby makes... uh, you do the math."

Rafe assures Sami she's safe. She says she needs more time. She can't go home right now. Pan in to Mia Junior.

Phillip shows up at Titan looking for a file. Melanie sits on it and dares him to get it, "Have you seen the latest numbers? We are going to be rolling in it soon."

"This show stopped rolling in it a long time ago," says Phillip, "Now we're shoveling it."

Melanie hands him the folder, "Take a look. Like what you see?"

Phillip eyes her, "Yes. Hope this doesn't mean you'll be cashing in soon."

"Why would you care," she asks, "You got what you wanted."

Phillip says, "Not yet I haven't." He moves in for a heapin' helpin' o' Melanie.

Max interrupts the daydream.

Melanie fans herself, "Is it hot in here?"

Phillip and Stephanie rush to the hospital.

Patch sits beside Kayla, "I love you so much baby. Before I met you my life was nothing. The years we were apart were a waste. Now we can waste them together if you stay with me. Don't leave me."

Kayla mumbles, "I won't leave you. I'm not going anywhere as long as Hope is out there with a gun."

Rafe tells Sami he has to move on. Sami says she isn't ready to go back home, "I have to lose the baby weight."

"Yeah," says Rafe, "But for most mothers, losing the baby weight doesn't mean losing the baby too." He gets a call. It's Roman, "Yeah, she's right here."

"How can that be," asks Roman, "I don't hear any wailing, blubbering and sobbing in the background."

EJ and Nicole talk about Miss Junior-Junior and life in general. EJ gets an idea and leaves. The baby babbles. So does Miss Junior-Junior. Nicole's phone rings. It's Mia. Nicole growls, "What do you want?"

Lexie and a nurse come to get Kayla. They wheel into the corridor to take that long journey down the last mile.

Hope walks up to her, "Kayla... I'm so sorry. I should have pointed my gun right at you and then I couldn't possibly have hit you."

Patch gets in Bo's face, "YOU KNEW! You knew this would happen!"

Mia says Dr. Baker stopped by, "He gave me a clean bill of health. Along with a clean bill for services." She says she's leaving for Japan tomorrow. Miss Junior-Junior cries and Mia asks about her, "Say hi to her for me. It's dumb. I mean..."

"I know what you mean," says Nicole, "It may be dumb but it's the only show that will hire us right now." Nicole hangs up as EJ comes in. She says she was talking to Miss Junior-Junior.

EJ hands her a glass and toasts, "Here's to living all the Days Of Our Lives in love, happiness and total ignorance."

Rafe hands the phone to Sami. Roman says he needs her to stay put until they make sure Sleazo acted alone, "And I'm afraid I have some bad news. I didn't want you to hear it from somebody else. The bad news is Hope's a cop and she's licensed to carry a gun."

Sami gasps, "OMG, that's terrible."

"Not as terrible for you as it is for Kayla.," says Roman, "She's been shot and is headed for surgery. I'll call you when I know something."

"That means I'll never hear from you again, doesn't it," asks Sami, "Tell Uncle Steve I am praying for her." Sami gets off the phone. Rafe says he's sorry. Sami says Roman wants her to stay put, "You're stuck with me. I'm Sorry."

"Not as sorry as I am," says Rafe, "But it's better than being stuck with Hope and a gun."

Proud Melanie shows Max her business card. Max asks if she's still playing the DiMeras vs. Titan. Melanie says she's still feeling things out.

Caroline calls Max and drops the Kayla bomb, "She's been shot."

"OMG," gasps Max, "Are you telling me someone let Hope have a gun again? " Max says he's headed for the hospital. Melanie follows.

Bo defends himself and tells Patch the hallucination he had wasn't clear, "I saw Hope... I saw a gun..."

"That right there was enough to alert Homeland security," says Patch. Stephanie shows up and we have a hugfest.

So, to recap, Hope shot Kayla and it's Bo's fault. She crawls all over him for being so irresponsible. Bo reminds her he told her to stay away from Kayla. It's too late for logic. Hope wants to know why he didn't tell her WHY he wanted her to stay away. He says he couldn't make sense of the visions and didn't think she would have taken him seriously. Hope seethes.

Roman arrives and gives Hope the 3rd degree. She blames Bo and walks off.

Melanie brings coffee but no one wants it. Phillip asks what she is doing there. Melanie rants about no one wanting her around, "I'm here for Max."

"What did Max ever do to deserve that," asks Phillip.

Max joins Stephanie for a few hugs, tears and sobs.

Announcement: Prevuze is feeling quite generous today. If you go to any Denny's Restaurant and order a Grand Slam before 2PM, just tell them to charge it to Prevuze and you'll get a free breakfast – No strings attached. Really. This is for real. No italics. Enjoy.


Rafe says, "I don't think of it as being stuck with you. I think of it as being a little glimpse of what purgatory will be like." He wonders if Sami will ever be able to leave Mia Junior.

Back at the mansion, A doctor examines Miss Junior-Junior and says she's doing just fine. She tells Nicole, "Bring her to my office next week and we'll check her weight and do blood typing."

Nicole about faints, "Blood typing? NO!"

Clueless EJ asks, "Is there a problem, sweetheart?"

Sami vows to protect Mia Junior from the DiMeras. She wonders if Nicole has had her baby. She thinks that will help her hide the truth form EJ because he will be focused on his family.

Nicole says she just hates the thought of her little girl being a pin cushion. We establish the fact that Nicole's blood is B+, so they don't have to do blood work. Nicole says she doesn't feel confident about nursing. The doctor and EJ gang up on Nicole, but she says she isn't comfortable with it, "I was bottle fed and I am fine. In fact, I plan to get back to the bottle first thing tomorrow."

The doc leaves. EJ says he thought she wanted to breast feed, "What changed?"

Phillip rounds up Stephanie. He hopes she doesn't feel guilty because of what they were doing when she got the call. Stephanie has no regrets.

Lexie comes out and gives a play by play update on Kayla's surgery, "The bullet missed her heart and lungs but punctured the pericardial sac. We have to stop her heart to repair it."

Patch tells her, "Do what you gotta do."

"Don't worry," says Lexie, "I'm experienced. Most of my patients' hearts stop during surgery."

EJ backs off and tells Nicole the breast feeding decision is her choice. She hands the baby to him and he gives her a bottle. He asks, "Isn't it amazing how you can love someone so much when you didn't know them before at all?"

"Happens all the time in elevators," says Nicole.

Rafe and Sami share a rare quiet moment. "Before long we'll be going our separate ways," says Sami. Rafe wanders.

EJ and Nicole admire Miss Junior-Junior.

Sami isn't sure who Mia Junior looks like. "DNA can be a strange thing," says Rafe, "Especially in a family as inbred as yours."

EJ and Nicole decide they should name Mia Junior. They roll through a bunch of names, "Jensen, Adelle, Erin, Air Head..."

Rafe asks, "What about Erin? I like that for a girl." He and Sami run through names, Jenna... Skyler...

"Waitasec," says Sami, "We don't need a list. I have a perfect name."

EJ and Nicole are down to the S's. "Shelby... Sadie... Susan... Nicole comes up with Sydney.

Sami comes up with Grace because it's through the grace of God she has her, with a little help from Nicole.

Lexie announces Kayla made it through the surgery and the prognosis is good. Hugs and smiles. Bo and Hope lock eyes.

Stephanie turns to Phillip, "Thank you for (say it with her) being there for me." Hugs. Melanie watches. Roman leaves to call Sami. Lexie leads Patch and Stephanie in to see Kayla. Melanie swoops in on Phillip. He brushes her off.

Bo offers to give Hope a ride home. "What makes you think you still live there," asks Hope. She heads out for some time alone.

EJ gets a call. Nicole pulls his phone out of his pocket and he tells her to put it down. He just wants to spend time with Sydney and Nicole.

Rafe is reluctant to hold Grace but Sami forces him. Sami doesn't know how she can stand being separated form her baby.

Kayla stirs. L'il Joe has come out of nowhere.

EJ and Nicole feed Sydney.

Sami and Rafe coo over Grace.

L'il Joe... Sydney... Grace... all soon will be joining Ciara in soap opera limbo.

A couple of workmen bring their equipment into the hallway of the hospital to survey the damage. Hank looks at the walls, "This is going to save the hospital a lot of money. No need for that new air conditioner now."

Right," says Joe, "If they let Hope keep her gun, we should send her over to the west wing to do the same thing."

Prevuze

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12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh hot damn, this my jam - put your hands in the ayer, ayer, aa yer.

Ooops, forgot I was back from New Orleans and back to Prevuze. It appears I haven't missed crap since I have been gone. On one hand that's a good thing, on the other it proves, this show sucks.

I wish those photos were of Kristen Alfanso, holding up the writers and asking them to account for how badly this show sucks right now. But still hysterical and welcome to Twitter Prevuze!

3:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"There was an accident. Someone accidentally let Hope have a gun."

The Hopester’s got a gun
Her dog day’s just begun
Now everybody’s on the run
The Hopester’s got a gun

Hope grills Bo about his hallucination, "You lied, and now I'm burdened with knowing I shot your sister. You could've stopped this."

I believe that’s called transference of blame.

"Have you seen the latest numbers? We are going to be rolling in it soon."

"This show stopped rolling in it a long time ago," says Phillip, "Now we're shoveling it."


The show should be renamed “The Excrement of Our Lives”.

Back at the mansion, A doctor examines Miss Junior-Junior and says she's doing just fine.

First, Dr. Baker shows up at her apartment to examine Mia, and now another doctor examines Miss Junior-Junior at the mansion. The DOOL scribes have written into the script two house calls in one day. This just goes to show you that the writers are truly delusional.

The doc leaves. EJ says he thought she wanted to breast feed, "What changed?"

In the process of elimination, EJ can start by ruling out the size of Nicole’s boobs.

Lexie comes out and gives a play by play update on Kayla's surgery.

Does this mean that Lexie is a cardiothoracic surgeon or is she doing a Vin Scully for Dr. Creepy who is now a cardiothoracic surgeon?

Prevuze proves that a photo is not worth a thousand words. It also takes a caption or six.
Great stuff Prevuze!!!

5:35 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

In the process of elimination, EJ can start by ruling out the size of Nicole’s boobs.

LOLOL – Ah, Leslie, that would require EJ to have a clue about what pregnancy does to a woman’s body. Living with a fake rubber baby bumber for months and not catching on to that fact pretty much puts him with Lucas in the clueless department.

“This show stopped rolling in it a long time ago," says Phillip, "Now we're shoveling it."

When I saw the title of today’s Prevuze report I thought to myself, “My dog rolls in it too - and it stinks. They must be referring to the writing on this show."

"Don't worry," says Lexie, "I'm experienced. Most of my patients' hearts stop during surgery."

I hope she isn’t the one actually doing the surgery. Now that she’s taken the time to come out and chat she’ll need another 20 minutes to get sterile again before continuing.

My HUH?! moment today:
He says he couldn't make sense of the visions.

Well, unless Bo was having a different vision from what they've beem showing the audience it seemed pretty darned clear to me. Hope picked up a gun, pointed, fired and Kayla fell over covered in blood.

Between yesterday and today Prevuze has produced a bevy of great pictures with hapless Hope’s handgun handiwork. HAHAHAHA

7:12 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

hapless Hope’s handgun handiwork. HAHAHAHA

Heavens... hilarious.

7:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Steve & Kayla scenes sound SO GOOD! So glad to finally see them together!

Oh, and is Lil Joe REAL this time?

Thanks, Prevuze!

8:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think this pretty much sums up everything: "DNA can be a strange thing, says Rafe, especially in a family as inbred as yours."

I have a question for Prevuze to clarify. This wasn't in italics so I wasn't sure when Melanie said she was there for Max if Phillip really said "What did Phillip ever do to deserve that"? She might not be my favorite character but if he really said it and I was Melanie I would've whipped out my cell phone right in Phillip's face and told EJ the DiMeras just won the contract.

Loved all of the Hapless Hope pics and this one:"I'm not going anywhere as long as Hope is out there with a gun." HAHAHHA

Thanks, Prevuze, for a welcome bright spot this morning.

8:31 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

I have a question for Prevuze to clarify. This wasn't in italics so I wasn't sure when Melanie said she was there for Max if Phillip really said "What did Phillip ever do to deserve that"?

I don't think Phillip actually said that but if my life depended on it, in other words if Hope were pointing a gun at someone near me, I couldn't swear to it.

Just as a reminder, italics in Prevuze are shown as a courtesy, but are by no means mandatory. That's the official rule. I just made it up five seconds ago.

8:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just read that because of the digital switch in February they've pushed the regular sweeps back to March. That means whatever miniscule thing was going to happen in February will another month down the road.

10:42 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

That means whatever miniscule thing was going to happen in February will another month down the road.

Hmmm... I wonder if that's a month in DOOL time or real time.

11:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Looks like someone needs to take shooting lessons but that doesn't help Kayla. Why didn't you tell Hope about the damn vision or at least steal her gun?

4:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, I have to know. How many people went to Denny's? LOL!!

5:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No Denny's for me thanks, but perhaps the actors who played Steve and Kayla got a chance to go to Denny's for breakfast this morning, since they seem to have gotten the pink slip from Dool this week. And here we all thought the worst of their problems was Hope's bad aim.

It should have been Hope gorging at Denny's instead. She's the one DOOL cast member mostly in need of a decent meal. The 20 cal diet shakes she's devouring every 8 hours don't seem to keep her fit to fire a gun.

9:03 PM  

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