The Best of Both Worlds

Gabi has him on the ropes.

Eli and Lani Make a Porno

JJ: "I can deal with my father." Just don't tell him any secrets. #DAYS

I wanted Eli and Lani to throw it down right there on his desk in front
of the security cameras. Then, the title of today's episode could have
been "Eli and Lani Make a Porno." #DAYS

If you ask me, the JJ marrying Haley would be more believable that Tripp
marrying her. Then again, #DOOL is where logic goes to die. #DAYS

If this isn't all part of a plan, Eli and Lani would have to improve to
reach the level of incompetence. #DAYS

Renting Bowling Shoes

Haley, go ahead and marry JJ. In Salem marriage is less of a commitment than renting bowling shoes. #DAYS

Claire thinks Tripp is obsessed with Haley. Better to be obsessed with Haley than cray-cray Claire. #DAYS

Claire: "I have hundreds of thousands of followers." They must be the same dead people who vote in Chicago elections. #DAYS

Rafe discovers Hope smiling at Ted. That makes it even for him sleeping with Sami. #DAYS

Best Kidnapping She Ever Had

Ciara says Ben was so good to her in the cabin. Best kidnapping she ever had. #DAYS

Steve won't be home for a while. Weaving character absences into unlikely plots is a #DOOL writer skill. #DAYS

Better Dig Two

John: "Here lies the guy whose only crutch
Was loving one gal just a little too much
If Marlena goes before I do
I'm gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two" #DAYS

Protip for Eric: Don't reject Sarah until we know for sure Xander or some other random guy is available for her to run to. #DAYS

At least they got an orderly in there to clean up Marlena's ashes. #DAYS

Eric says Sarah is a loyal person. She's not being to loyal to Rex right now. #DAYS

Krispy Kremes

Claire: "Any friend of my boyfriend is a friend of mine." Any male friend that is. #DAYS

Thing is, if Claire was on the level with her scheme about Haley, that should endear her to Tripp. Instead, this is eventually going to have the opposite effect she wants. #DAYS

Too bad Marlena didn't give up Krispy Kremes for Lent. #DAYS

Lowlife Scum

Marlena has died almost as many times in this episode as she has in real life. #DAYS

Tripp demands to know who Claire is talking to. Even though Claire is being a lowlife scum, why would it be any of his business? #DAYS

Taking His Lips For A Test Drive

Gabi tells Brady his heart was in the right place trying to protect Chloe. True. His head, however must have been in an oxygen deprivation chamber. #DAYS

Tripp has Haley hide behind the couch. That may work when hiding from ICE, but not when hiding from Claire. #DAYS

If I were Haley I'd give myself up to ICE. They will only deport her to a country where she knows no one and doesn't speak the language. Child's play compared to the wrath of Claire. #DAYS

So, if I followed all that, basically Stefan talked Chloe into taking his lips for a test drive. #DAYS

Please, build a wall around Salem. It will keep the illegals out and the knuckleheads in. #DAYS