Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Your Everyday Sociopath

Phillip finds Brady at Titan. Brady announces that he's off to play one-on-one with a client, "Do you want to come along?"

"Didn't you say one-on-one," asks Phillip, "Wouldn't I be an extra."

"I never was that good at math," says Brady.

Phillip declines to go, "I'm on a paper trail. It's serious. It involves Melanie."

Melanie bounces into the pub. Max wants to know why she's in such a great mood. Melanie beams, "Tell me what you know about EJ DiMera."

"For one thing," says Max, "He's too dumb to figure out Nicole isn't pregnant."

Nicole holds the baby and tells Mia she's perfect. Mia doesn't want to see her.

Sami rants, raves, rocks and rolls. Sister Teresa assures her God is watching over her. As Sami's pain hits new heights, she wishes she had become a nun, too.

Sleazo shows Rafe the picture of the kids, "If you don't tell me where Sami Brady is, I'll kill all of her kids one by one... like cows at a slaughterhouse."

Meanwhile, back at the clinic, Dr. Baker says Sami's baby isn't getting enough oxygen. That's because Sami is using it all up with her screaming and hyperventilating. Dr. Baker tells her to push, and then gets that horrible look of death on his face people in soap operas get right before we find out everything is OK. Sami panics, "Is my baby OK? ANSWER ME!"

Phillip and Brady babble about Melanie. Phillip blows up, "EJ DiMera is trying to steal Melanie and the bio-fuels project from Titan."

Prevuze

.Phillip says his source on this is confidential, "We have to stop her."

Melanie says she's sniffing around about EJ because it's business. She swears Max to silence and tells him EJ came to the Cheatin' Heart looking for her and asking about the Alternative Fuels Project, "He's interested in funding the project." Max asks about her agreement with Titan. Melanie says it's verbal, "The more greedy hands the more money in the pot."

"I think it was Karl Marx that said that," says Max.

"I want to imitate a bidding war," squeals Melanie, "JUST LIKE EBAY!"

"That sounds more like something Groucho Marx would say," says Max.

Nicole puts the baby in a drawer. Just like all Salem babies, neglected from the start. She tries to cheer Melanie up. She tells her she was brave the way she got through this and will be even more brave giving her baby a good life, "You should be proud of yourself."

"I can't do this," whimpers Mia, "I just can't."

Phillip beats himself up for making a verbal agreement with Melanie. He smirks as he figures out how to get to her.

Mia whines, "My baby... she's mine! Does she look like me?"

"No," says Nicole, "You don't look much like a shriveled gherkin." Mia thinks if she sees the baby's face or holds her she will want to keep her. Nicole wants to take Mia to the clinic. Mia doesn't want to go. She just wants to rest. She makes Nicole promise her baby will always be happy. "I can't do that," says Nicole.

Sleazo grills Rafe. The Rafester refuses to talk. He tells Sleazo one of Sami's kids is a DiMera, "If you kill one of Stefano DiMera's grandchildren, you may as well pick out your headstone." Sleazo says he figures he's a dead man any way if he doesn't eliminate Sami, "Tell me or one of the kids dies tonight!"

"That would be a good thing," says Rafe, "since it seems like this night will never end."

Sami bellows. Dr. Baker screams, "Push like there's no tomorrow!"

Max says he doesn't want Melanie to get hurt. He says a verbal agreement is binding. "Not if there is no written proof of it," says Melanie. She says Phillip is treating her badly and this is about putting her project in the right hands. She swears she can handle it. Phillip walks in. Max asks, "Can you handle him?"

Mia changes her tune and makes Nicole promise she will always love her baby. Nicole tells her the longer she waits to make the decision she already made, the harder it will be.

Rafe wants Sleazo to leave innocent people alone. Sleazo doesn't think anyone is innocent. Rafe growls, "You're just your everyday sociopath... void of compassion... narcissistic..."

Sleazo sneers, "Which one of the twins should I kill first?"

Sami screams like a tortured banshee. Dr. Baker yells, "FORCEPS! NOW!"

The nurse says, "Doctor, you forgot, we're just a backwoods country clinic we don't have an OR and we don't have forceps!"

Baker screams, "CROWBAR! NOW!"

Phillip asks to speak to Melanie in private. They find a table and he tells her he's embarrassed he tracked her down, "Truth is I didn't want to eat alone. In fact I've been trying to lose some weight and I knew if I ate with you I'd lose my appetite altogether." He wants to iron out a few things about the Alternative Fuels Project. Melanie stalls and says she has to leave. She bolts. Max tells Phillip to stay away from her.

Rafe works to free his hands as Sleazo soliloquizes. He gives Rafe one last chance to talk.

Mia tells Nicole she can have the baby. She assures Nicole she's OK, so Nicole can go, "Bye baby girl..."

Phillip thinks this is about him dating Stephanie. Max claims it's about Melanie, "Treat her with respect or I will make sure she leaves Titan with the patent."

"I'd lose billions," says Phillip, "But to get rid of Melanie, it might be worth it."

Outside, Melanie runs into Brady. He says he was just thinking about his dad.

"Your dad," repeats Melanie, "John Black, right?" She tells him her father was murdered, "He wasn't the best father in the world but you only get one right?"

"That's not necessarily true if you live in Salem," says Brady, "I'm sorry if it sounded like I was complaining about my dad not being around."

"You weren't complaining," says Melanie, "You were grieving over the fact that he's gone. Just like the Jarlena bunch. I never could figure out what they saw in that couple."

"Don't make fun of them," says Brady, "They don't like that."

"They won't know," says Melanie, "They don't watch the show any more."


Rafe agrees to tell Sleazo where Sami is.

Sami pushes.

Mia sleeps. Nicole thinks she's just a baby herself and hopes she doesn't regret what she has done.

Phillip and Max continue to argue about Melanie.

Phillip leaves and Pete brings Max a large mystery envelope.

Melanie talks about Trent. She thinks the Alternative Fuels Project is her chance at redemption.

Rafe throws a glance towards Sami's medal on the table. Sleazo gets it, "You gotta be kidding me. Shea's at the convent?"

The infant babbles. So does Mia's baby. Nicole wishes she really were EJ's baby. She packs the kid up and heads for the clinic. Mia opens her eyes, "My baby...."

Rafe works his hands loose. Sleazo says, "Now that I know where she is I have no use for you. Tough luck Agent H!"

Sami pops a beautiful baby girl, but the glee is short-lived. Sami freaks, "Why isn't she crying? What's happening?"

"What's happening," says Dr. Baker, "is across town, an inexperienced fifteen year old kid delivered a baby like a trooper and right here we've got a babbling woman who's had four kids acting like she's the adolescent delivering a baby."

20 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

"Tell me what you know about EJ DiMera."

"For one thing," says Max, "He's too dumb to figure out Nicole isn't pregnant."


…and to think a never ending major storyline hinges on that completely ludicrous plot point. Geez.

Sami panics, "Is my baby OK? ANSWER ME!"

Of course, the baby is OK. The next completely ludicrous plot point in this never ending major storyline has Nicole switching Mia’s baby for Sami’s baby. Geez.

"The more greedy hands the more money in the pot."

"I think it was Karl Marx that said that," says Max.


No, that was Bernard Madoff.

"Treat her with respect or I will make sure she leaves Titan with the patent."

"I'd lose billions," says Phillip, "But to get rid of Melanie, it might be worth it."


Right on, Phillip. Hopefully Melanie will be able to pedal her alternative fuel project to a corporation on another soap opera.

Rafe works his hands loose.

Again? Apparently Sleazo doesn’t know how to tie a square knot…right over left, left over right. Obviously, Sleazo was never a Camp Fire Girl.

Paper work, paper work, paper work…how can Nicole just walk off with Mia’s baby without legal adoption papers? That should be a snap for her. After all, her finance is a lawyer. Oh that’s right. This never ending major storyline hinges on the completely ludicrous plot point that EJ has no clue that Nicole is not pregnant. Geez.

Bulldog, I was wondering the same thing. When Marlena skipped town with John, she also skipped out on her practice. Prevuze, does Dr. Creepy put those magazines in his waiting room or does he keep them in that special secret drawer in the night stand next to his bed? This episode of Daze certainly appears to be filled with a lot of empty calories. Thank goodness Prevuze is once again kick starting my heart on this miserably cold Tuesday morning.

5:37 AM  
Anonymous Betyar said...

LOL! Loved the pics of the magazine subscriptions Dr. Dan surrownds himself with nowadays! The "modern maturity" must be an old issue by now!

So...the killer want to kill all of Sami's kids one by one..."like cows at a slaughterhouse." Hmmmm...where have I heard that before? Perhaps Sleazo is really the "stew maker" they keep showing on the news this week... he's the guy that got convicted of boiling in acid the delinquent patrons of his employer, a "nameless" Columbian drug lord. I didn't think Dool was so up on current events! Who would have guessed?

6:27 AM  
Anonymous Judith said...

Who writes these things, men? They never remember the afterbirth. Who watches these things? Women. We remember that after a baby is born the work is not over and we do not fall peacefully to sleep.

Morons.

6:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love the fact that Daniel lives on Shady Lane!

6:44 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

"The more greedy hands the more money in the pot." "I think it was Karl Marx that said that," says Max.

No, that was Bernard Madoff.


Prevuze and Leslie both make excellent observations!

He says a verbal agreement is binding. "Not if there is no written proof of it," says Melanie.

The fact that the twit is working at Titan, there have been project meetings with other staff members, she’s talked about it with Victor and half of Salem – yeah I think there might be a little bit of evidence that she has an agreement with Titan.

Loved Bulldog’s pic. Who would ever choose to have Marl as their psychiatrist? She’s on staff about 2-3 months every decade or so and is always cancelling appointments, taking off on extended vacations at the drop of a hat, or just plain getting kidnapped.

Mia sleeps. Nicole thinks she's just a baby herself and hopes she doesn't regret what she has done.

Well, since the actress has been put on contract I have a feeling that she’ll be around making Nicole regret she ever met her. LOL

Judith pointed out what are just a few of the "give-me-a-break" issues with these two births. No doubt the stupidity will continue. For example, EJ won't notice that Nicole immediately has her svelte figure back.

On the other hand, Hope was sporting low-rider, belly-button revealing, size 0 jeans a day or two after her 12 month pregnancy and giving birth to Ciara, so maybe the instant recovery from having a baby isn't all that rare among Salem females. HAHAHA

Thanks for all the funny pics and comments y'all.

6:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my god. I am a 24 year old woman, but I never truly googled the word "afterbirth" or "placenta" before. This is the stuff that makes me not want to have children... eek!

7:30 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

When I saw the title of today's episode I wondered which Salemite they were referring to. HAHAHA

Pete brings Max a large mystery envelope. OMG, let's hope the dope opens it and doesn't spend weeks staring at it, carrying it around, showing it to everyone coming into the place and not opening it like he did Trent's mystery box.

I'm so glad I was reading this at home and could laugh freely when I saw Dr. Feelgrope's diverse reading material as well as my favorite Prevuism today: "Don't make fun of them," says Brady, "They don't like that." "They won't know," says Melanie, "They don't watch the show any more." I bet. :P

Thanks, Prevuze, for some cheer on this icy grey day!

8:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dr. Feelgood doesn't live on Shady lane....isn't that Chloe Lane?

8:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am wondering what Nicole cut the umbillcial cord with, Ummmmmm???
Once again, details, details ,details........

Nicole runs to the clinic, has Dr. Baker, give Mia's baby to Sami and Nicole, keeps Sami's baby....I understand that Mia is staying on the show, and is possibly the daughter of someone,on the show, but who??? I wonder how the writers will manipulate that one......
What will Nicole do when Sami's baby looks so much like Sami, hard to cover that one up......

9:13 AM  
Anonymous Got a million of 'em. said...

Shouldn't that be:
Dr. Daniel Jonas
555 Chloe Lane
Salem USA?

9:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mia's baby is going to want to eat soon too, they like to latch on shortly afterwards, babies are hungry, that little girl is going to be screaming for some food... What if EJ insists on Nicole breastfeeding...what will happen then?????

9:15 AM  
Anonymous WingNut '75 said...

As Sami's pain hits new heights, she wishes she had become a nun, too.

Yeah - because becoming a nun worked out so well as birth control for great-grandma Coleen.

Sami screams like a tortured banshee. Dr. Baker yells, "FORCEPS! NOW!"

Since this is her fourth kid, I just figured she'd lay down on the table and let the baby just crawl right out.

Sami pops a beautiful baby girl, but the glee is short-lived. Sami freaks, "Why isn't she crying? What's happening?"

Because her blabbermouth of a whining mother has all of the dialogue in the scene leaving no room for anyone to get a word in edgewise (as usual) - that's why she isn't crying.

Anonymous asked "I understand that Mia is staying on the show, and is possibly the daughter of someone,on the show, but who???"

My guess is the long lost, hardly ever seen (and extremely SORASed) Ciara. Or maybe they've SORASed the baby that Nicole "miscarried" and she's now Mia. Hey - this is DOOL and anything is possible with this set of moronic writers.

No triple or quadruple screens today? I guess Fox must have needed their split-screen machine back to make some more episodes of a show that actually has a storyline that moves (and viewers that really want to watch it).

Prevuze - the best 24 blog on the internet ®

10:03 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Dr. Feelgood doesn't live on Shady lane....isn't that Chloe Lane?

Shouldn't that be:
Dr. Daniel Jonas
555 Chloe Lane
Salem USA?


I guess it's true. Great minds think alike.

10:10 AM  
Anonymous lucygoose said...

Great magazine labels!
And, the Melanie/Brady "discussion"? Yes, the Jarlenas are mass jumping off cliffs like lemmings as we speak. Good call on that one.

10:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why is Dr. Dan in scenes with Rafe??

Oops, my bad... different Sleazo, lol.

10:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am sure the writers, who can never come up with anything new, will use the "some medical issue with Sami's baby, that only the mother can donate or help." Since her baby seems to be having issues today with the cord around the neck and not crying.......
and then Nicole will be found out and out of luck.

10:35 AM  
Blogger Sarolite said...

Regarding adoption papers and walking out with a baby, you don't need any such thing if you've got a doctor on payroll to make you a birth certificate. That's the easy part. All Baker has to say is he was present at the birth of Nicole's baby, and he treated Mia after a miscarriage and noted acute stress and depression, and bada-bing bada-boom.

Then Mia takes Nicole to court, EJ insists it's ridiculous and defends her as her attorney. They do a DNA test and find that EJ is the father, Mia is not the mother, but *gasp* do they test Nicole vs the baby? And if they do, how does Nicole explain EJ being the father and her not being the mother?

12:11 PM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Mia could be someone's daughter.

Well, this is DOOL. We've all suspected for a long time Nicole had a kid with Trent that she didn't want and gave away and would appear SORAS'd. Therefore Nicole just delivered her own grandkid. HAHAHAHAHA

3:22 PM  
Anonymous Berg said...

Come on afterbirth, utensils to cut umbilical cords, adoption paperwork, a real plot, I mean these things are just so trival.

4:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know how incredibly confusing it can be to keep the tightly coiled family branches straight in DOOL. Colleen is not Sami's great-grandma. That is on the Black/Toscano/Evans side. Colleen is Sami's great-aunt (aunt of Roman from Shawn, a brother of Colleen).

8:38 PM  

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