Thursday, August 28, 2014

Dancing With The Bores

Things improve for Ejami now that Sami wants something—This behavior is covered in the Guy Manual chapter, "Just Like A Woman." #DAYS
 
Places Abby gets amorous: EJ's locker room, Hospital supply room, storeroom... It sure doesn't take much atmosphere to ignite Abbs. #DAYS
 
Aiden and Hope continue to dance around each other: Dancing With The Bores. #DAYS
 
Theresa certainly has a low opinion of men.  Which is another way of saying the woman really knows how men are. #DAYS
 
For #DOOL veterans only: Someone should tell Ben about the "Bra Wire" trick for getting phone reception. #DAYS

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Expunged

I swear, Chance and Ciara's relationship is more mature than Aiden and Hope's. #DAYS
 
JJ is so grateful to Aiden for getting his record expunged.  Apparently JJ hasn't gotten Aiden's bill yet. #DAYS.
 
So Eve never got over Paige's dad leaving? It sound to me like she was the reason he left. #DAYS
 
Clyde says people from Poplar Bluff say what's on their mind. They way they're portrayed on #DOOL I'm surprised they have one. #DAYS

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Repurposed Flying-Rat Waste

Sonny & Will remind us of  a side of the gay marriage issue rarely discussed. It may be a right but, unfortunately it's still marriage #DAYS
 
Victor seems anxious for that refill. Brady's on the wagon so Victor's drinking for two these days.
 
Ben chokes on the "L-word." Guys' vocal chords are genetically shaped to make it difficult to say. #DAYS
 
Kristin: "Call me crazy..." Bat-guano* crazy if you ask me.
 
*Prevuze is a family blog—I use euphemisms for re-purposed flying-rat waste #DAYS

Friday, August 22, 2014

Something To Be Proud Of

Will and EJ have nothing to say to each other. In true #DOOL form they proceed to spend most of the episode talking about it. #DAYS
 
The salacious magazine story has finally given Anne something to put her in a good mood. #DAYS
 
Roman keeps scrunching his face when he looks at Melinda like she's speaking Chinese. #DAYS
 
Will wanted something to be proud of.  He should have rescued a puppy in distress instead. #DAYS

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Hakuna Matata

HOLD IT! STOP THE SHOW! Can someone please offer a word of prayer for poor Abigail to endure all the abuse of being EJ's shower slut?
 
Sonny says he didn't realize Will would sell his soul. Actually he sold his mom. #DAYS
 
Jennifer: "How could Will write this about Abby?" Uh, just a wild guess, but because it's the truth? #DAYS
 
I've been wondering why Clyde doesn't go for Kate. Guys like him can recognize a woman looser than a pair of size 54 pants on Parker. #DAYS
 
Kate doesn't think sleeping w/Rafe had anything to do with his breakup w/Jordan. Yeah, you know how flexible women are about cheating. #DAYS
 
Kate's dress is cut so low it shouts "hakuna matata," which, of course, is Latin for "get a load of my ta-tas."  #DAYS

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Kristin, Nicole, Theresa, Chloe...

Mary Beth says when she asked JJ if the kid was his she was trying to be funny. Translation: She was trying to be a snotty bitch. #DAYS
 
Nicole says she did everything she could to help Eric; after she did everything she could to help herself and it failed. #DAYS
 
Kristin, Nicole, Theresa, Chloe, on and on... Forget Eric, maybe Brady's the one who should become a monk. #DAYS
 
Abby says Will getting the cover story is an honor. Finding out she shares that honor: not so great. #DAYS

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Ho-Down

Daniel counts Parker's ribs.  I thought he reserved that kind of shenanigans for his female patients. #DAYS
 
It's a Nicole vs. Kristin showdown. Or perhaps it would be more appropriate to call it a ho-down. #DAYS
 
Eric must still have little bit of a priest left in him.  His hair looks like someone anointed his head with oil. #DAYS
 
Kristin: "I didn't destroy the man I love while pretending to be on his side." No, you destroyed him while pretending... Yes you did. #DAYS

Monday, August 18, 2014

Feel The Love

Theresa wants breakfast to be on Eve. Sounds like a great idea. I love food fights. #DAYS
 
Abby finds Ben stretching in the park and notices how buff he is. Bonus: He's not just buff, he's also in the buff. #DAYS
 
Sami arranges for the kids to go to a "sleep away" camp. Her attempts to dump them get more creative every time. #DAYS
 
EJ, Ben and Abby together. Hope, Jennifer and Aiden together. Feel the love. #DAYS

Friday, August 15, 2014

Creative Solution

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "What would you have done if father had succeeded in cutting off Rafe's..." Kate: "I would have had him use a strap-on" #DAYS

a Narcissistic Vengeful Bitch

Half nekkid Will: He may be gay but the judges rule viewers of all orientations are allowed to take in the scenery. #DAYS
 
Sami says Will must've wanted to surprise her with the article. "Surprise" doesn't begin to say it. #DAYS
 
Rafe wants Jordan to "think about it." Since that requires thinking, she'll have to do that for both of them. #DAYS
 
Sami says Will made her sound like a narcissistic vengeful bitch. If that's the case he really must be a good writer. #DAYS
 
As many people as came to the door, Will and Sonny should've ordered lunch from some place with a 30 minute delivery guarantee. #DAYS

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Just Ask EJ

Ben wonders if Jordan wants Rafe back. Does a starving dog want a steak dinner? #DAYS
 
Will's going to blindside Sami with the article. And we know how well Sami reacts to being blindsided. Just ask EJ. #DAYS
 
Rafe buys Kate's BS. I swear the only use for his head is to cover what would otherwise be a gaping hole on top of his neck. #DAYS
 
Kristin says Daniel ruined a perfect plan. If it was perfect, why is she under arrest? #DAYS

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Divorceyland

Why does Sami need a restraining order? Because as EJ proved with Abby, he certainly can't restrain himself. #RimShot #DAYS
 
Johnny wants to go to Happyland with Mommy and Daddy. Too bad. They're too busy heading for Divorceyland. #DAYS
 
Amazing. Kristen and Daniel were in that truck for three days and no one had to go to the bathroom. #DAYS
 
Hope tells Jennifer she's always happy to see her. NBC censors cut out when she said, "You man-stealing bitch." #DAYS

Monday, August 11, 2014

Throwing Her Life Away

JJ is ecstatic that Paige is throwing her life away for him. #DAYS
 
Eve tells Brady she's a "real good listener." That's good because after Brady left Theresa had a few things to say to her. #DAYS
 
Aiden makes a move on Jennifer. Jennifer: "I could be a good beard." Or, given her level of perception, a good houseplant. #DAYS
 
Aiden might have more success with women if he approached them at an adult level. #DAYS

Thursday, August 07, 2014

Every Excuse In The Book

EJ cheated on Sami. Sami cheated on Rafe. Rafe cheated on Jordan. Jordan needs to hook up with EJ and cheat to complete the cycle. #DAYS
 
When Ben was pelting Rafe the gals looked like they were actually pushing him into Rafe rather than pulling him off. #DAYS
 
Rafe tells Jordan he doesn't want to make excuses.  Then we hear every excuse in the book. #DAYS
 
And in desperation, Rafe plays the "you deserved someone better than me" card. #DAYS
 
Tammy Sue turns into Tammy Whine-ette and runs out. Not standin' by her man, though. #DAYS

Wednesday, August 06, 2014

One Step Away From Bikinis And A Mud Pit

Rafe's there to talk but Sami has something she wants to say first.  No surprise there. #DAYS
 
Ben and Abby suck face.  Clyde walks up, "I'm sorry to interrupt." I guarantee Ben is sorry he interrupted, too. #DAYS
 
Sami is using the same "broke your heart" argument with Rafe that Rafe is using with Jordan and EJ is using with Sami. #HeadSpinning #DAYS
 
Sami: "Remember the safe house? I don't think I'd be here if not for you." Hilda's ghost: "And I WOULD be." #DAYS
 
Jordan smacks Kate and then it all fizzles out.  Dang.  We we're just one step away from bikinis and a mud pit. #DAYS
 
 

Tuesday, August 05, 2014

A Slut-Apprenticeship

Eric's feelings for Nicole—You can take the priesthood away from the man but can't take the man out of the priest. Something like that #DAYS
 
Nicole in bed had to be Eric's fantasy. She said they wouldn't be breaking rules.  Not breaking rules would be a turn off for Nicole. #DAYS
 
Here's a switch — Rafe is furious at Sami... for telling the truth for once. #DAYS
 
Adrienne insists Abby is not a slut. What—is there some kind of a slut-apprenticeship you go through before earning the full title? #DAYS
 
Will throws a pink teddy bear at Sonny. STEREOTYPING. #DAYS

Monday, August 04, 2014

Sami's March Through Salem

Sami drops the "Kate-Rafe" bomb on Jordan. Sherman's march to the sea was a walk in the park compared to Sami's march through Salem. #DAYS
 
Kate reminds Rafe they only slept together one time.  I have a feeling in Jordan's world once is plenty. #DAYS
 
Gotta believe Kristin could've made a ruckus if she wanted to when the goon was in the storeroom. #DAYS
 
When Eric stared out the plane window all I could think of was William Shatner's classic Twilight Zone gremlin scene. #DAYS

Friday, August 01, 2014

Abby The Homewrecker

 

SNARKnado

You've seen #Sharknado. You've seen #Sharknado2. Coming up: the Prevuze SNARKnado. #DAYS
 
Those of you at home watching in your underwear... you have a whole lot more on than JJ and Paige. #DAYS
 
Sami and Kate laugh about their conquest of EJ and Stefano reminding us of the adage 'he who laughs last laughs best.' #DAYS
 
Daniel's escape was so easy Kristin needs to hire a better class of goon. #DAYS
 
Eve says Jennifer won't listen to reason from her.  Doesn't that take some form of ability to reason? #DAYS
 
How did we know Daniel was still alive after Kristin attacked him? She clobbered him with the bucket but he didn't kick it." #DAYS
 
Statistics show the main cause of severe injury in Salem is bumping into people. #DAYS
 
So, Sami gave away EJ's (EJ Wells that is) Formula 1 car. Now, that's hitting below the belt. #DAYS
 
Ben reads Abby's tell-all resignation.  Apparently it should be titled, "Fifty Shades of EJ." #DAYS
 
Eve learns Daniel is Maggie's son and zeros right in on Mags' checkered past. #DAYS

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