Shut Up And Service Me

Marlena: “We never have to deal with Stefano again.” How can she think that? So many people come back from the dead on this show that this year Salem is hosting the Zombie Nation Annual Convention. Lexie is scheduled to be the keynote speaker. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — “You’re the DA. Your job is to prosecute criminals.” Belle: “Really? I guess I should read my job description.” #DAYS

Gwen to Xander: “Shut up and service me.” I don’t think she means, “gas ‘er up, check my oil and clean my windshield.” #DAYS

Xander: “I enjoy our time together.” Apparently Xander’s technique is a little too… uh… “efficient” for Gwen to feel the same way. #DAYS

Gwen reminds Xander: “Speedy service is only a good thing if you’re Domino’s Pizza.” #DAYS

ResurrLexieon!

Lexie wakes up. It’s a ResurrLexieon!

Lexie shows up at Stefano’s will reading. Abe’s jaw drops. He, Lexie, and Paulina had better convert to Mormonism tout-de-suite. #DAYS

Interesting observation: Lexie has been dead for 15 years but somehow has aged right along with everyone else. Ergo: dead people age. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Kayla: “What’s up?” Abe: “Lexie.” #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rolf: “Bringing Lexie back from the dead is a historic first… well,  except for that little incident in Jerusalem a couple millennia ago.” #DAYS

Sophia! OK, it’s only Kristen’s imagination. For a minute there I thought today’s episode was a back-from-the-dead-a-pallousa. #DAYS

EJ to Kayla: “Medical research isn’t illegal.” I’m guessing Lexie would agree with him on that one. #DAYS

A Pram-off.

I want to hear more of Cat’s story about Santa Claus getting an apartment in Brooklyn. #DAYS

Alex suggests Joy stay in Salem. That’ll make Stephanie’s day. #DAYS

Julie tells Stephanie she was in a similar situation once. At least that tidbit of gossip got Stephanie interested in something beside herself. #DAYS

It’s move out day at the Salem U dorms. That school year sure went quick. Holly only had time to burn the dorm room down once. #DAYS

Joy and Chanel’s baby carriages crash into each other. Ooooo! A Pram-off. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Joy: “This is my baby Kelsey.” Chanel: “Do you know who the father is?” Joy: “The leading candidate is Alex.” #DAYS

If Joy has any form of wardrobe malfunction, we’re going to have a boob-alanche. #DAYS

Scenes we’d like to see: the ensuing melee after it is revealed that Stefano left his entire estate to Rita. #DAYS

Stefano: “This will is real and final.” Until a new mystery will is found next year. #DAYS

A Fortune Cookie

Jeremy says he knows Stephanie is strong enough to get through her crisis. I have no clue where he got that idea. Maybe he read it in a message from a fortune cookie. #DAYS

Chanel is in the hospital for a mammogram. Dr. Sarah says she will walk Chanel down to radiology herself. The people who write #DOOL have no concept of how things work in a real hospital, do they? #DAYS

Would-be killers in Salem need to stop having lengthy conversations with their potential victims, which gives the victim time to turn the tables, avoid getting killed and causing the perp to get arrested or hauled away by the men in white coats. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sarah (on phone): “Johnny nearly died from inhaling gas in his apartment.” Jada: “Was there a leak?” Sarah: “No. He farted.” #DAYS