Friday, July 31, 2009

Left Hanging

Well, DOOLers, as sometimes happens, we got no satellite feed today. I have spent years trying to figure out why we sometimes don't get a feed, but haven't made much headway. I checked the listings and don't see any major events coming up next week that would preempt things. With Michael Jackson and Wimbledumb long gone, I can't figure any reason they wouldn't be having a show in the US on Monday.

Perhaps they are pre-planning for the president to have a hangnail that they can report on for the full hour. Or maybe the "beer-summit" at the White House got out of hand and instead of reporting on a presidential hangnail, they'll be reporting on a presidential hangover.

There is always, of course, the possibility some mischievous mammalian miscreant maliciously masticated through our cable and the problem is with our equipment. I can check that out later but, OMG, I Hope we don't have to get Norris out here. He already has my firstborn.

So now we have all these unanswered questions:

Will they be able to determine if Chloe is still in her coma, or just doing an imitation of Rafe?

Beating himself up in his jail cell over the love triangle he's involved in, will Daniel choose Lucas or Carmine?

Will Kate win the Betty Crocker Cookoff with her recipe for "Killer Brownies?"

Will the Salem Police finally capture Luke O. Sistine?

Will Sami finally choose a lover... Rafe... Lucas... EJ... I don't know... Brandon... Austin... The Salem Men's Glee Club... Anybody?

Will Kate finally accept Stefano's marriage proposal?

Will Abe follow in the footsteps of other politicians and publicly admit he's hooked up with some cheap whore, only to reveal it's Lexie?

Will Will write his will against his will?

Will EJ think Nicole is pregnant again when a new couch is delivered and he catches the scent of the foam rubber cushions?

Will Belle and Shawn finally be able to find their way out of Salem Harbor?

Will the next presidential "beer summit" be a futile attempt to reconcile the Lumis and the Ejamis?

Will Brady and Arianna finally get together without accidentally bumping into each other?

When Carly returns to the show, will she finally reveal who the song "You're So Vain" is about?

Will they finally get on with it and reveal Nicole switched the babies in time for the November sweeps? November 2015, that is.

And last, but not least, will we receive the shocking news of a major cold snap in hell and also learn DOOL has been renewed for another year?

I guess we won't know until Monday. With no feed today they've just left us hanging. Like the president's nail.


Hey, it's FRIDAY! Make it a great one. We'll see you on the flipside of the weekend.

NOTE – you can now follow Prevuze on twitter at:

Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Thursday, July 30, 2009

A Murderous Home-Wrecking Bastard

Kate stands over Chloe the vegetable and says it's comforting to see her like this, unable to cause more pain, "Why don't you just drift off, like a DOOL viewer. Don't fight. Let go. Everyone will be so much better off."

Out in the audience, Henrietta turns to Maude, "Well, at least she's right about that."

At the hospital, Brady finds Will. Will asks, "Why were you talking to the nurse about Chloe? Why is Chloe here?"

"Because," says Brady, "The vegetable section at the Salem SuperShop is full."

Over at the jail, a guard comes up to Daniel's cell and tells him his lawyer is there. Lucas walks up behind the guard. Well, Lucas may not be a lawyer, but he certainly qualifies as a mouthpiece. The guard unlocks the door, lets Lucas in and leaves.

"How did you convince them to let you in here," asks Daniel.

"Are you kidding," says Lucas, "The way security is around this place, I could have waltzed in with a half dozen terrorists and the pachyderm section of the Ringling Brothers circus."

Lucas and Daniel stand and stare at each other. Lucas breaks the silence (as he usually does), "You SOB!"

Meredith answers a knock at her hotel room door and finds Stefano. "I am going to explain to you why I brought you here," says Stefano.

We pan in on a newspaper clipping, "Bride-to-be dies mysteriously."

Sami and Rafe suck face. Rafe stops things and says he senses something is amiss with Sami. Of course, this isn't a great feat since something is always amiss with Sami. Sami puts up a perfunctory argument but Rafe convinces her to come clean, "Well," she says, "I was wondering where you went after you went to Emily's grave."

Stefano hands Meredith a check. Meredith about swallows her tongue, "OMG! This is a lot of money!"

"For what you have done," says Stefano, "you deserve every penny."

"Dang," says Meredith, "I wish actors on DOOL could rake it in like this."

Multipolar Sami does a 180° and tells Rafe to forget it. Rafe, however, decides to come clean, "I'm gonna tell you the truth."

Chloe's machines beep as Nicole comes into her room. Nicole gasps, "OMG! Chloe! What happened to you?"

Kate hugs Will, who continues to asks what happened. Kate says, "Chloe is very ill. Someone tried to kill her."

"OMG," gasps Will, "Who?"

Daniel apologizes, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry my ass," says potty-mouth Lucas, "You slept with my wife and then tried to kill her!"

Stefano talks to Meredith about grants his corporation awards. She wonders why he didn't wire the money. Stefano says he discovered she was brought up in Salem and thought she would enjoy the idea of coming home. She tells him it's been very hard for her to come back there.

Rafe tells Sami he went to see Meredith. Sami says she knows Meredith blames him but insists it was an accident, "unless there is something else you're not telling me."

Lucas blows his stack. He wonders if they had sex at the engagement party. "Are you claiming you didn't? Why? Because you're such a stand up guy and my wife isn't a whore?"

Them's fightin' words. Daniel lands a haymaker right on Lucas jaw. Oooo. An injury to Lucas' mouth could be fatal. Lucas can't reach Daniel's jaw so instead he rams his head into Daniel's solar plexus. And we're off and running with a full blown...


Kate tells Will that Daniel was in love with Chloe. Will is stunned, "But she's... She rejected him because she's in love with my dad? That's why Daniel tried to kill her?"

"No, sweetie," says Kate, "People react to Chloe's whining in different ways. She drove Brady to drugs and Daniel to homicide."

Nicole sits with Chloe and rambles. She says she's so grateful for Chloe's friendship after what she has done.

Chloe pops out of it for a second, "Actually, Nicole, although it was quite an ordeal, I thought the flesh-eating bacteria was a very creative touch on your part."

Stefano says he is concerned that he shouldn't have brought Meredith there if it's painful for her. He puts on the sensitivity act, "You know, I myself had a tragedy recently. I lost a wonderful son, whom I tortured on and off again for years and trapped on a desert island for an eternity. The pain is unrelenting."

Harriet turns to Maude, "It certainly is."

"I had a recent loss myself," says Meredith, "I lost my sister. We were very close."

"Was your sister here when she passed away," asks Stefano.

"No," says Meredith, "But the man responsible is here."

Sami and Rafe argue about who's to blame. Sami asks, "Are you saying you could've stopped her from dying?"

Rafe whispers, "Yes."

Hilda's ghost appears, "Uh... take that with a grain of salt. He's not very good at stopping people from dying."

Sami protests, "Come on, Rafe it was an accident. How could you have prevented her from getting killed?"

Stefano insists he wouldn't have brought Meredith here if he had known she would have run into the man responsible for her sister's death. Meredith says she needed to come back and face her fears, "Emily had moved to Virginia to be with her fiancée when he joined the FBI. That guy came to see me earlier today to tell me he has a new love. He should be in jail. He murdered my sister."

Sami wants Rafe to cut it out, "Thinking like that will drive you crazy."

"I'm living with you," says Rafe, "How could things get any worse?"

"Emily loved you," says Sami, "and wouldn't want you thinking that way." Rafe says he's found love with Sami and she taught him to love again.

"My grandma says the heart is the most resilient muscle," says Sami, "And the mouth is the most overworked."

Rafe says, "I love you and always will. You believe me right?"

The Bammer In The Slammer cage match ends in a draw. Daniel warns Lucas, "Do not talk about her that way."

Lucas continues to goad him, "What? My wife isn't a whore? Not a slut? You are a murderous home-wrecking bastard!"

Sleepy, the jail guard shuffles up and asks, "What's all the commotion about? Is everything OK in here?"

Daniel says he's having a disagreement with his attorney. Daniel tells Lucas he went after Chloe but she resisted because she loved Lucas, "If you wanna hate someone, you hate me."

Nicole says she didn't want to burden Chloe with her terrible secrets. She tells her about the miscarriage, Mia's baby and the switcheroo, then has one of the most comprehensive breakdowns in the history of drama. She talks about Grace's death, "Sami doesn't know that my Sydney, her baby, is alive. Oh, God, Chloe. Maybe even you will never forgive me. Maybe I will never forgive me." Chloe twitches. Nicole gasps, "OMG."

Lucas says he can't believe he trusted Daniel, "I'm just a big fool."

"That's what makes you so lovable," says Daniel.

"Now I know Chloe broke off the engagement because she was in love with you," says Lucas.

Will has a lot of questions. Brady leaves to make a call. Kate tells Will that Chloe was in love with Daniel. Will is stunned, "Are you saying she tricked me?"


Supersensitive Stefano asks how Meredith's sister passed away. She tells him there was a car accident.

Sami says just because Rafe loves her doesn't mean he has to shut out his feelings for Emily. Rafe says he doesn't want Sami to have any doubts about his love for her. Sami says, "You have (say it with her) been there for me with everything that has happened and you've been so strong. You've (say it with her) been there for Allie and Johnny and even Will."

"Somebody had to (say it with him) be there for them, because their parents sure weren't."

"You put aside your pain for me," says Sami, "We need you. We love you. You are so strong."

"I get my strength from you," says Rafe, "But these lines came from McDialog's."

Lucas says, "I get it. Chloe dumps me and I start drinking. I go to confront you and find Chloe there and then, boom, the whole place goes up in smoke. That's what she was doing there. She was with you." Lucas wonders why Chloe married him.

"She had a pact," says Daniel, "A pact with God."

Nicole has rushed out to tell Maxine about Chloe's twitchification. Maxine says, "The movement was involuntary... Kind of like any thoughts Chloe had before she was in the coma. It's beneficial for comatose patients to have visitors and she might even hear what's being said."

"You're kidding," says Nicole, "She can hear me?"

"It's possible," says Maxine. She leaves.

Nicole sits down beside the bed, "Hey Chloe, you know what I said before? Big joke. HAHA. I Hope you enjoyed that completely fabricated story. You want to hear a few more hot ones? I got a million of 'em. You've always been a great listener. You had to be if you were married to Lucas. You've always (say it with her) been there for me. Please open your eyes. I love you. Open your eyes." Brady comes in and watches the maudlin act.

Meredith tells Stefano on the wedding day Emily found out a terrible secret about Rafe.

Sami and Rafe have hopped into bed. "I want this to be just about us," says Sami, "Don't think about anything else."

"Believe me," says Rafe, "Right now there is nothing else on my mind."

Brady comes in and Nicole hugs him.

Will wonders, "Why didn't I see something was off. I thought Chloe was good for my dad. I Hope Daniel stays in jail."

Kate tells him they have to be prepared for Daniel to fight for his innocence, "I'm sure he will say some pretty bad things about me."

Daniel tells Lucas about Chloe's pact with God, "She told God if you survived she would marry you."

Lucas is cynical, "I'm touched about her pact with The Almighty, but you had the affair anyway."

"No," says Daniel, "When you married her she was committed to you body and soul. I never broke my promise to stay away form her."

Meredith says Rafe killed Emily because of what she found out about him. She gives Stefano the details, which aren't anything more than we already know. She says she has no idea why they got in the car. Meredith says she wanted to believe it was an accident but couldn't. Stefano asks, "What changed your mind?"

Rafe stops the festivities, "I have a question. I want to say something and you can't act weird."

"Sorry, Rafe," says Sami, "I have to be myself, so you'll have to settle for weird."

"You saved my life," says Rafe, "You're my hero." Sami suppresses a giggle. "You're dying to mock me, aren't you," asks Rafe.

"It's just that I've never been a hero before," says Sami.

"Yes you have," says Rafe, "You've been your kid's hero... taking the time to see them once or twice a year... leaving them alone to play in traffic... actually remembering their names... you're amazing."

Sami gets serious, "I love you and you are definitely the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I thank God every day for bringing you into my life because you are my life."

Out in the audience, mass suicide breaks out in the Lumi and Ejami sections. An usher rushes to the scene and yells, "Cleanup on aisle seven! And eight! And nine... ten... eleven..."

Daniel insists he let Chloe go because he loved her. Lucas has trouble grasping that concept, as well as all other concepts. Daniel insists he didn't try to kill Chloe.

"Oh yeah," sneers Lucas, "Who did?"

"Your mother did."

Kate tells Will once lawyers get involved all bets are off. She says she doesn't think Chloe will make it, "It would be a miracle if she survived."

Brady tells Nicole, "I'm (say it with him) here for you. Whatever you need (say it with him) I'm here for you."

"What about you," asks Nicole.

"I'm here for me, too."

"I know you still care about Chloe," says Nicole.

"I do," says Brady, "The thought of her not being around... I don't like that."

"If she leaves us," whines Nicole, "who will I talk to? Who will I bounce my problems off of?"

"You still have me," says Brady, "We still have each other."

As they hug, Nicole asks, "You've been to that new McDialog's place, haven't you?"

Meredith says she changed her mind about Rafe a few months after Emily's death, "He refused to explain what they were doing in the car. I have moved on and stopped trying to get justice. It's too late."

"For justice," says Stefano, "it is never too late. For good drama, it's true... we missed that bus. Perhaps Rafe will not go to jail, but there is someone who should know what he has done."

Sami sleeps. Rafe stares and flashes back to the dying Emily.


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Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Brady comes to the hospital to see Chloe. Maxine tells him he can't see her but there has been no change. Brady practically begs her to tell him she will come out of the coma. Maxine isn't optimistic. The audience cheers.

Sami rushes into the pub looking for Rafe. Arianna says she doesn't know where he is, "What have you done to him?"

Rafe wanders in the woods.

Mia finds Nicole outside. Nicole says she's worried about Chad. Mia says whatever Nicole said to him worked, so now he Will never know she was pregnant with Sydney.

We pan in on Chad at the gym. CENSORED.

EJ picks Sydney up, kisses her and sighs, "Something's wrong. Something's very wrong."

"What," says Sydney, "You mean this is going to be a good episode?"

Stefano wanders out in the foyer as he talks on his phone, "Of course, I look forward to it. Ciao!" He hangs up his phone and chuckles.

Sami spits back at Arianna. Arianna says she's scaring her. She says she told Rafe not to get involved with her, "But he did anyway. He felt something he hasn't felt since..."

Sami doesn't let her finish. She gasps, "OMG," and bolts out the door.

Rafe sits by Emily's grave and tells her he thought he could move on but maybe he never can or doesn't deserve to.

Nicole tells Mia she is stunned that they've put one over on Chad. She says her husband and daughter are her whole world and vows not to lose them. Nicole leaves.

Will comes into the gym as Kinzie meets Chad. Kinzie sees Chad staring at Will and asks who he's staring at. Chad don' wan' no drama right now. "I know you're looking at Will. I also know he has something you want... Mia."

Nicole comes into the rumpus room and bugs EJ about what's bothering him. He says nothing, but he just wants to make sure she and Sydney don't go away.

Sami finds Rafe at Emily's grave. She rushes up to him, "I'm so sorry for last night."

She starts to hug him but Rafe is distant, "Sami, you shouldn't have come here."

Arianna calls Rafe and leaves a message. As she hangs up, some weirdo creepo ugly guy comes up and puts the moves on her. Out of nowhere, Super Brady drops from the sky and beats the stuffings out of the guy.

Nicole asks what's up with EJ but he brushes it off. Nicole digs. Stefano interrupts. Nicole keeps digging. EJ goes upstairs for business stuff. Stefano wonders what's up with Nicole. She tells him something is horribly wrong. Stefano laughs, "Your optimism is firing on all cylinders. You're a joy to be around." Nicole says she knows something is wrong but isn't so sure what. She thinks EJ is suspicious of something, "It's only a matter of time until the cat claws it's way out of the bag and if Sami Brady...

Stefano interrupts the tirade, "How the hell is she going to get proof."

Nicole says, "You know damn well how."

Stefano asks, "How?"

Nicole says, "Rafe."

OK, gang, you know that issue Sami and Rafe cleared up yesterday about Emily? It's now uncleared again and they go over the well-trodden ground of his obsession with her. Sami tries to convince him it was an accident, "I don't judge you for this at all."

"You mean that," asks the big lug.

"No," says Sami, "The joke's on you. I love you so much and hate seeing you torture yourself and the viewers over this." Sami tells him she ran into Meredith.

Rafe says, "hat's impossible! She moved to Florida."

"Don't forget," says Sami, "Salem borders Florida. And Maine and Washington and New Mexico and England, France and the Duchy of Grand Fenwick."

Rafe isn't thrilled that Sami met Meredith. Sami tells him about meeting her in the woods. Rafe pouts and walks off.

Chad says, "Come on, Kinzie, don't play dumb with me."

"Who's playing?"

"I know you have a thing for Will Horton," says Chad.

"A thing," asks Kinzie, "What does that even mean?" Chad thinks Will and Mia won't last so she has an opportunity to move in. "That's lame," says Kinzie, "Uh... you really think so? It would be really good to piss Mia off."

Kinzie moves in on Will... just to talk, "I just came over to apologize for being such a total bitch." Chad watches as Kinzie does her thing and, of course, Mia comes in. Chad swoops down on her.

Arianna pulls Brady and El Creepo apart. El Creepo gets up off the ground and yells, "You crazy SOB!" He runs off.

Arianna tells Brady the guy was hitting on her but she could have taken care of herself. Brady says "When you need help, I will always (say it with him) be there for you."

Arianna asks, "What's really going on here, Brady. Why are you so obsessed?"

Brady says, "I care about you a lot. And after yesterday I can assure you nobody I care about will ever get hurt again."


Rafe arrives at Meredith's room at the Salem Inn, "Meredith, It's been a long time."

"What," she growls, "Since you killed my sister?"

Brady says, "You remember I told you I was married before? Well, my former wife is very ill. And this time it's not her brain." Brady thinks he could have been more observant and maybe Chloe wouldn't have gotten sick.

"I think you might be overreacting," says Arianna.

El Creepo shouts from the bushes, "I'll say he is!"

Brady says, "Overreacting is better than not reacting at all."

El Creepo shouts, "That's your opinion!" Brady starts to go, but Arianna stops him.

Chad apologizes for being insensitive jerk. Mia says she's there to meet Will. Chad plays dumb (it's not a stretch), "Oh... Will... is he here?"

Kinzie tells Will she's jealous of Mia and apologizes. Will thinks she should apologize to Mia.

Chad points out Will and Kinzie across the room. Mia goes over. Kinzie pipes up, "I'm so glad you're here."

Mia says, "No you're not."

EJ comes back into the rumpus room babbling about business. Stefano asks what's going on between him and Nicole. EJ insists nothing.

"Don't insult my robust intuition," says Stefano. EJ continues to insist nothing is going on. Stefano scowls, "Tell me! No more baloney."

"No more baloney," asks EJ, "You mean you want them to take the show off the air?" EJ sighs, then comes clean, "I love my wife and daughter. But last night I had to admit it... I can't get Samanther out of my mind."

"I wouldn't worry about it. There is a lot of empty space in there, so you probably have room for Samantha."

Sami bumps into Nicole and Sydney as they walk through the park. Using that, oh so uncanny intuition only DOOL characters have, Nicole senses something is wrong. Sami says "Rafe and I broke up... or something. We're not together any more."

A buzz goes through the Lumi and Ejami sections of the audience, "Did you hear that? Did she really say that? Did she? Huh? Did she?"

The manager walks out onto the stage, "Ladies, please... we have a show to put on. Please don't get your hopes up. You know these writes flip around like a jumping bean on a hot griddle. Just sit tight and you'll see what I mean."

Rafe says he understands how Meredith feels. Meredith says he doesn't and never will. It seems Meredith isn't sure Emily's death was an accident, "It was an act."

"Meredith," says Rafe, "Your sister was my life. I loved her."

"To death!"

Arianna tells Brady she thinks he's amazing. Brady thinks that's great, but he knows she's promised herself not to get involved with a recovering addict. He vows not to slip up again, "If you give me the opportunity I won't let it happen again." Brady moves in.

Kinzie tells Mia they need to talk and work things out. She leaves. Mia asks what that was all about, "I saw you two being all friendly."

"She was just trying to be nice," says Will, "Can we just forget about her for now?"

Mia asks, "How about forever?"

Kinzie goes back to Chad and tells him it went well. She asks if he's going to get back to Mia.

As Chad considers making his move, a gym rat runs up to Will and hands him a note.

EJ tells Stefano he had a dream about Sami. Stefano tells him his feelings for Samantha are not healthy.


The show continues after the men in the white coats guide her out of the theater.

Nicole is shocked that Sami and Rafe might be history. Sami tells her about Rafe running away from her. Then Sami runs away from Nicole. Nicole asks, "Stefano, did you do this?"

Rafe says he knows Meredith will always feel this way about him. Meredith wants to know how he found her, "That blonde, are you involved with her?"


Meredith lectures, "Just as you start to get it together your past comes back to haunt you. Such terrible timing."

Will reads the note and tells Mia something is going on with his dad and his current wife, "I have to go." Mia offers to go with him. Will declines and says he will call. He leaves the gym.

Mia pouts. Kinzie smiles. Chad moves in. "I have some news for you," he says.

Brady and Arianna munch around on each other. He asks her out on date #2. Arianna agrees. Brady leaves. Arianna watches as he goes. Then El Creepo shows back up.

Nicole rushes into the rumpus room looking for Stefano. Instead she finds EJ, who tells her, "I sent him away because I have bad news for you."

Rafe tells Meredith he thinks he made a mistake coming there. He says he's fallen in love again. "That just lifts my spirits to no end," says Meredith. Rafe says he would trade places with Emily but can't. However, he's not going to feel guilty for falling in love again. "The world will find out what you did," says Meredith, "And that includes Samantha Brady. Rafe leaves.

El Creepo scolds Arianna, "Don't you ever do that again."

Arianna hands him an envelope, "That's every last dollar." El Creepo looks around, surreptitiously sneaks a small bag into her hand and then leaves.

Brady is back at the hospital, but Maxine won't let him see Chloe. Will runs up asking about her.

Chad tells Mia he's not going back to boarding school. He'll be going to school with her this semester. Mia rolls her eyes.

Nicole flips out, "A coma? I just talked to Chloe and she was fine." EJ says no one knows how this could have happened. Nicole breaks down, then tries to compose herself, "No... I'm not going to fall apart. I will stay strong for Chloe."

"You can lean on me," says EJ, "I'll always (say it with him) be here for you. Lately I've had a few things on my mind, but now I'm back 100%. I'm (say it with him) here for you. I will (say it with him) always be here for you."

Rafe comes into Sami's place. Sami is surprised he came back. "Of course I came back," says the big lug, "I love you."

"Me too," whines Sami.

"Nothing will ever change that," says Rafe. Translation: Stick a fork in this relationship...

Meredith smiles at the man standing in front of her, "I wanted to thank you for arranging my return to Salem."

Stefano smiles, "It was my pleasure."


NOTE – you can now follow Prevuze on twitter at:

Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

One Hell Of A Jam

Abe and Bo stand in the cop shop and, between donuts, discuss the evidence against Daniel. Bo thinks he's innocent. Abe tells him he has to arrest Daniel anyway. Bo growls, "I care about finding out who poisoned Chloe. And it sure as hell wasn't the doc."

Abe says, "Careful, Bo. If you claim a guy is innocent, that's nearly enough evidence to send him to the electric chair."

Hope has Daniel on the rack. The gibbet awaits. She says she thinks if Daniel's theory is right, Kate has had a real streak of luck, "And tell me this, how did Kate get hold of leukocystine?"

"I think he was a former client," says Daniel. He begs her to protect Chloe.

Hope insists Chloe is safe, "If anything should happen to Chloe now it proves you didn't do it, and Kate's house of cards falls apart."

"So you believe me," asks Daniel.

"I didn't say that," says Hope.

"Watch her," says Daniel, "You watch Kate very carefully. I certainly do. All the time. I'd do a lot more but she won't let me grope her any more."

Victor and Kate argue. Victor says he won't have Kate framing his godson. Loserclueless runs up and interrupts, "What's going on?"

Victor smirks at Kate, "Will you tell him or should I?"

Kate hugs Lucas, "It's Chloe... she's in that room." Lucas runs into Chloe's room.

Victor chuckles, "You're going to have a hell of a time figuring out how to get out of this one."

Lucas finds Lexie inside Chloe's room, "Is she going to be all right?"

"We don't know."

"What the hell happened to her," he asks.

Rafe wonders why Sami is lying to him. Sami gets all indignant, but realizes she's busted, "It's none of your business."

"Were you snooping around in my past," asks Rafe, "That would be my business."

"I know how to end this argument," says Sami, "Just tell me about your past!" They argue about Rafe's past. OMG! Contrary to what we've learned on this show, apparently the past isn't in the past. "I've told you about my past," says Sami, "Well, the tip of the iceberg, anyway. Please, trust me!"

Rafe asks, "And if I don't tell?"

"Then we can't move forward," says Sami, "Come on! Just tell me what happened. All of it."

Lucas comes out of Chloe's room, "She is in a coma!"

"What tipped you off," asks Kate.

"She wasn't whining."

"Someone poisoned her," says Kate.

"How did it happen," asks Lucas.

"Tainted brownies," says Kate.

Lucas grits his teeth, "THOSE LITTLE SLUTS!"


Phillip comes up and says he just heard on the news Daniel did this. Lucas pops a cork. Victor chimes in, "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. My feeling is Daniel Will be exonerated. In fact, I'm certain of it."

Abe calls Lexie and asks about Chloe. Lexie says, "Her coma is deeper."

"Deeper," asks Abe.

"She's gone from unconscious to uber-unconscious."
As Lexie hangs up she says, "I have to go give Lucas the gory details."

Bo finds out Lucas is back and decides he needs to question him.

As Lucas goes back in with Chloe he tells Kate and Victor to stay away. Phillip follows and tells Lucas he'll keep them at a distance.

Kate tells Victor Lucas would never believe she was involved in Chloe's poisoning. Victor scoffs, "The way he reacted he'd believe anything I said about you."

Phillip comes out, "Why would Daniel have done this?"

Lucas sits at Chloe's bedside and vows never to leave her again. I guess he'll throw himself on her funeral pyre.

Lexie comes in and drops the bad news on him, "Lucas, I have to tell you, Chloe might never wake up."

"But," whines Lucas, "I can't lose her."

"I can recommend a good taxidermist," says Lexie.

Bo goes into the interrogation room and says Chloe is slipping further into a coma. He has Hope come out as Daniel buries his face in his hands.

Victor taunts Kate, "I think you're in one hell of a jam." Kate thinks it will be OK once Daniel is convicted. Victor vows not to let that happen, "Maybe I'll tell Bo you confided in me."

"You'd be lying."

Victor nearly chokes to death chuckling, "You poison someone and I'm not supposed to lie? I want Daniel free."

Kate asks, "Why should he go free after what he did to my son?"

Victor continues to find amusement in the situation, "Isn't it ironic for you to be outraged about infidelity?" Phillip joins them and wonders what the bickering is about. Victor tells him they are arguing about Daniel. Phillip sort of sides with Daniel until Kate drops the bomb about Daniel's affair with Chloe.

Bo brings Daniel coffee and tells him this is off the record. He says only Daniel's prints were on the bottle. Daniel mocks, "Oh, yeah, super criminal that I am I got the bottle and wiped the pharmacists prints off but not mine. I guess if you really thought I did it, though, I'd be under arrest. You and Hope are listening to me very carefully, aren't you?"

Lexie tells Lucas, "I wish I had better news."

"I wish Chloe had a better doctor," says Lucas. Lexie leaves. Lucas pours his heart out, "This isn't how the story ends." The audience groans. "You're going to get better," says Lucas, "I swear to God you are."

Bo says he is preparing a lineup for the pharmacist and Victor is sending a lawyer. "So you do believe me," asks Daniel.

"That and a buck will get you a bus ride," says Sam Spade Brady.

Lucas buries his face. Chloe twitches.

Phillip asks if Lucas knows about the affair. Kate says no and she won't tell him tonight, "He's been through enough."

Phillip turns to go back into Chloe's room and mumbles, "I thought my life was a mess."

Victor gets back on Kate's case, "Your concern is touching... And a little bit scary."

Hope comes in. Victor sees her and says, "Hope, I have something to tell you." Kate squirms.

"So," asks Rafe, "This is an ultimatum?"

"No," says Sami, "This isn't an ultimatum. I'm asking."

"Well, then," says Rafe, "I'm saying no."

Desperate times call for desperate measures, so Sami decides to tell him everything about her past, "and then it's your turn."

"I get it," says Rafe, "Kind of like 'you show me yours and I'll show you mine.'"

Victor tells Hope Daniel had nothing to do with poisoning Chloe. Hope tells him he can be a character witness, "But I'm here for concrete evidence. I want to talk to Lucas."

"If it's concrete you want," says Victor, "Look inside his head."

Kate begs Hope to leave Lucas alone, "He's fragile right now." Victor drags Kate out for air.

As they go, Hope muses, "Hmmm... Kate doesn't want me to talk to Lucas and Victor doesn't want me to talk to Kate..."

Sami goes through her history. We shift from scene to scene as we hear about her changing the paternity test results when Marlena had Belle... Alan raping her... her shooting Alan, "I shot him in the worst place for a man. He'll never rape another woman..." Franco's death... Being on death row... and the classic soap opera switcheroo of all time, STAN!

Sami wraps things up by telling Rafe about divorcing Lucas and marrying EJ, "And now that's over and I'm with you."

Rafe sits stunned and open jawed like a guy that just got hit by a freight train. "That's my life in a nutshell," says Sami.

"Nutshell," gasps Rafe, "It belongs in a nut-HOUSE."

"And now it's your turn," says Sami. Rafe now realizes whatever piddling little problem he has with Emily isn't even a drop in a bucket.

Outside the hospital, Victor tells Kate he's trying to protect her. He says he doesn't care what she did to Chloe but won't let her pin it on Daniel, "You've dodged a bullet but you're not out of the woods. Hmmm... I think I just mixed a metaphor."

Hope comes into Chloe's room to see Lucas, "I need to tell you I'm here professionally." She drops the bomb that Lucas might be a suspect.

Rafe is stunned out of his socks, but not impressed, "As enlightening as that was I don't know that it changed anything. You chose to tell me all that."

Sami throws a fit, "I want to know who you are!"

"You do know me," says Rafe.

Sami stomps her foot, "I don't! How many brothers and sisters do you have? This is like living with a total stranger!"

Hope asks about any trouble there might have been between Lucas and Chloe. Lucas tells her they hadn't been married long enough to have problems. Hope tells him this is just standard procedure, "Were you ever at Daniel's apartment?" Lucas tells her he was and Hope says they found evidence there. Lucas says they found a scarf there and Hope ends the interrogation. Lucas says, "You find who did this and make them pay."

Hope goes back out and tells Kate she didn't say anything about the affair, "We both know you'd do anything for Lucas." Hope leaves and Phillip comes up. He senses something is wrong. "I need to ask you to do something and it won't be easy," says Kate.

Abe tells Bo the pharmacist couldn't ID anyone at the lineup, but the DA is ready to press charges, "Book Jonas."

The cops bring Daniel into the room. Danny boy is just ecstatic because the pharmacist couldn't identify him, "Can I go home now? Huh? Can I go home?"

Bo bursts his balloon, "Dr. Daniel Jonas you are under arrest for attempted murder." They haul Daniel off as he screams he didn't do it and once again the SPD has kept its perfect record intact by arresting the wrong guy.

"We just made a big mistake," says Bo, "Daniel is in jail and Luke O. Sistine roams the streets of Salem free to commit more crimes."

Bo and Hope go into the interrogation room and discuss the case. Bo tells her he booked Daniel. Victor comes in as Hope leaves. Bo tells him the DA insisted they book Daniel. "This place is so soul deadening," says Victor. Bo says he has something to ask.

Phillip says, "Dear God!"

"He can't hear it from his mother," says Kate.

Loserclueless picks this appropriate moment to walk up to them, "Hear what?"

Phillip tries to spill the beans, "It's about Chloe... She... She..."

Phillip just can't find the words. Kate spits it out, "She betrayed you!"

Rafe says he doesn't like being manipulated. Sami wants the truth. Rafe finally breaks down. He says there was a car crash on the day he and Emily were to be married, "I was driving too fast and I wrapped the car around a tree. I killed her. Don't make excuses for me. I loved her. Now her family hates me and I can't blame them. Now you know. Are you happy?" Rafe leaves. Blithering Sami calls for him.

Victor tells Bo he has no idea who did this.

Phillip mops up after Kate's revelation, "Chloe had an affair with Daniel."

Lucas gasps, "Are you serious? OMG! You're serious, aren't you?" Lucas staggers off. He goes into Chloe's room and stares at her, "How could you?"

Daniel leaves his things at the desk. We roll through scenes of fingerprinting and mug shots. They walk Daniel down that last long mile and escort him into his cell.


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Monday, July 27, 2009

Licensed To Be Rude

Roman and Rafe are together in Sami's apartment having one of those friendly father-to-daughter's-grubby-little-boyfriend chats. Rafe tells him Sami isn't there, "So Sami got a call earlier. Was that you?" Roman says it was. "She said it was a wrong number," says Rafe, "Is there a reason she would have to cover up a call form her dad? I think you're hiding something form me."

Sami bumps into Meredith at the pier, "I'm glad I found you."

Meredith isn't so thrilled, "Just what do you want with me?"

They haul Daniel into the cop shop kicking and screaming. The cops pull him away form Bo and take him off.

Kate enters Chloe's room, "So, Sleeping Beauty, you can't wake up. I didn't do this to have Daniel charged with attempted murder. You have to die."

Sami tells Meredith she just wants to talk, "...About Emily."

Daniel and Bo argue. Daniel insists Kate set him up. Bo threatens to put him in a holding cell if he doesn't talk. Daniel agrees, "OK, I'll tell you everything you want to know."


Kate putters around Chloe's room, "So Danny came up with an antidote. We've had enough of that." Kate checks Chloe's IV as Lexie comes in and asks what she's doing. She tells Kate to leave the room while she examines Chloe.

Kate steps outside, "Well, apparently Lexie is also licensed to be rude." Victor shows up and Kate tells him Chloe is in a coma. "Couldn't happen to a nicer girl," says Victor. He invites Kate to the Java Café for a cup of real coffee as opposed to the swill they serve at the hospital. Kate declines. "What," says Victor, "You don't want to leave and miss Chloe's grand finalé? Why do I get the feeling you're not telling me the whole story?"

Meredith don' wanna' talk about Emily. Sami does. I guess we'll have to spend the next hour working that out.

Rafe says, "Sami is in an emotional state right now. I guess I don't have to remind you when she's like that, she makes impulsive decisions."

Roman goes straight for the jugular, "You mean like asking her bodyguard to move in? If you want to know what she's up to, ask her not me."

Bo tells Hope Daniel is sticking to his story. Hope wonders what Bo thinks about the possibility Kate did it.

Kate fills Victor in about Chloe collapsing. Victor relishes the whole story, "Did you get it on tape?"

Kate is grim, 'There is a chance she will never come out of the coma."

"Is there anything we can do to help with that," chuckles Victor, "Kate, is this your handiwork? You hate her."

"I've been careful," says Kate, "Don't forget, I hate you too, you know."

Nathan comes up and we have intros all around. Kate asks about updates on Chloe. Nate says Dr. Jonas has come up with an antidote they are monitoring its progress.

"Antidote," gasps Victor, "She was poisoned? He takes Kate aside, "Did you give her a big shiny red apple with arsenic in the center?" Victor simply can't contain his glee.

Meredith back off. She says she understands Sami is still grieving about her little girl. She apologizes for being rude and says Emily died because of something that never should have happened.

Hope selects a rubber hose from the case of implements of torture and interrogates Daniel, "Don't do anything stupid, Daniel. I'll handle that for both of us."

Daniel admits he's made some big mistakes. He says his affair with Chloe was inevitable. When she ended it he was angry at the situation but not Chloe, "Kate and I were lovers and she resents the fact that Chloe and I are still in love."

Lexie and Nathan work on Chloe. Lexie says the antidote isn't working. Nathan wonders if Daniel poisoned her. "It's not our job to play cop," says Lexie, "Even though we're a lot better at playing cop than we are a playing doctors. It's our job to save her life... if it's not too late.

Kate says they think Chloe was poisoned over a period of time. Victor is about ready to explode with laughter, "Why, Kate, that makes it sound intentional." Kate reminds Victor he is at the top of the list of Chloe's enemies.

Victor thinks Lucas will suspect Kate. "Don't be silly says Kate, "Lucas couldn't put two and two together if the answer were written on the bottom of the page." She tells him Lucas is on a business trip.

Victor finds this all very amusing, "Lucas loves that girl. He won't like it that you killed her."

Kate asks, "You don't think I have that covered?"

Bo is on the phone asking for a report as Abe walks in. Bo hangs up and turns to Abe, "Forensics is jerking me around."

"That's what they do to jerks," says Abe. Bo tells Abe he thinks Daniel didn't commit the crime. Abe is skeptical. He runs through all the evidence against Daniel.

"Geez Abe," asks Bo, "What crawled up your..."

Abe cuts him of and crawls up Bo's..., "I have had calls wondering if the commissioner will coddle this suspect like he did his brother. As the AG put it, your ass is on the line." Fortunately, it's a big line.

Daniel says he thinks Kate taped his voice and spliced it together to fake the threat. He thinks she planted the tainted brownies to incriminate him. Hope wonders how she could know for sure if Chloe loves Daniel, "I certainly can't ask her."

Victor prods Kate and Kate asks him to leave before Lucas gets there. "Lucas will be heartbroken," says Victor.

"He'll be sad temporarily," says Kate, "but in the long run it's for the best."

Meredith says she is still grieving for Emily, "The pain is always there. I watch DOOL every day." She talks about how Emily used to make her furious and then do something to make her burst out laughing, "We were very close. Then everything changed because of him."

Sami asks, "Him?"

Meredith says, "Rafe Hernandez."


Rafe makes a call, "Mrs. Brady, this is Rafe. I was just calling to see if Sami was still there... She didn't? No, I'm sure she's fine. We must've just gotten our signals crossed." he hangs up and mumbles, "Dammit Sami. You said you were going to drop it about Emily."

Abe says people know Jonas is Bo's father's godson, "I want you to take the evidence against Daniel as seriously as your gut. And believe me, your gut is getting pretty serious. You need to lay off the Krispy Kremes."

"I have a solution," says Bo, "Fire me."

Hope tells Daniel, "I want concrete evidence." She then proceeds to ramble on about her theory that Daniel poisoned Chloe, which is based entirely on circumstantial evidence, "What if Chloe knew something someone didn't want her to share?"

Victor continues to jab Kate. She asks him to keep their conversation confidential. He agrees, "In fact, I'd have to say good girl, Kate. Nice work. See you at the funeral. So, how are you going to keep Lucas from suspecting you? And the police?"

"As far as the police go," says Kate, "The perfect alibi in Salem is to commit the crime. Then you're the last person on earth the SPD will suspect."

Meredith says she liked Rafe in the beginning. She breaks down, insists she can't go on and runs off. Sami huffs.

Abe says he isn't going to fire Bo. He just wants Bo to know he's under a lot of scrutiny. A cop brings Bo the latest lab report. Bo looks it over and tells Abe, "Not good news for Jonas."

Daniel says if Chloe could talk she would back up what he is saying. Hope asks under the circumstances why Daniel would have agreed to be in the show. Daniel says Kate bribed him to do one more show. He knows it wasn't a good idea to work with Chloe, "I resigned and planned to leave town because it was painful to be around her."

"If everyone who thought it was painful to be around Chloe left, Salem would be a ghost town," says Hope, "And let me remind you, Chloe told Lexie she didn't want you around."

Bo brings a note into the chamber of horrors and hands it to Hope. Bo leaves and Daniel asks, "What's that?"

Hope whacks him with her rubber hose and slams the door shut on the iron maiden, "LET ME REMIND YOU THAT I'M ASKING THE QUESTIONS HERE, MISTER!" Daniel says he thinks Chloe was afraid to have him treat her.

Hope asks, "You mean she was afraid of you?"

Sami gets back to her place. Laconic Rafe surfs TV channels as she tells him the smock wasn't at Alice's, "But we had a good visit."

Kate refuses to discuss things with Victor and claims she didn't poison Chloe.

A call from Bo interrupts as Bo asks Victor for a name of a lawyer, "We're about to arrest Jonas."

Victor hangs up and turns to Kate, "What a surprise, they're arresting Daniel for this."

Sami evades Rafe's questions, "So, once you got the kids to bed, did you have some time to yourself."

"No," says Rafe, "I had an interesting conversation with your father."

Nate brings a folder to Lexie. Lexie reads the information in the folder and looks grim, "Things are looking worse. She may never come out of this. We should prepare to move her to the Jan Spears ward."

Daniel thinks Chloe was afraid because the pain medication might have caused her to say how she felt about him. Daniel also says he thinks Kate may have confided in Victor.

Victor barks at his lawyer and tells him to get down there and bail Daniel out. He hangs up and turns to Kate, "How do you get out of this mess without pinning it on Daniel? I will not let you do this."

"Go ahead and tell," says Kate, "Bo won't believe you."

"No," says Victor, "but Lucas will."

That got Sami's attention. Sh wonders why Roman was there. Rafe says he was just checking on her, "So, Sami, why are you lying to me?"

Hope thinks Daniel's theory makes Kate out to be a really obsessed woman, "How did She know what poison to use? Where did she get it?"

Daniel says he doesn't know, but he wants Hope to keep Kate away from Chloe.

Bo tells Abe, "The report says only Daniel's prints are on that bottle, the prescription was in his handwriting and a man with his description picked it up, "With all that evidence against Daniel, I've got to believe he's innocent."

Kate tells Victor she won't have threats. Victor says he won't let Kate do this to his godson. Kate reminds him there is an overwhelming amount of evidence. Lucas runs up and asks the same question he's always asking, "What's going on?"

Victor smirks, "Are you going to tell him, Kate, or should I?"

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Saturday, July 25, 2009

Christmas In July

Hey! I just thought of something. Isn't today officially "Christmas in July?"


Well, Merry Chr... choke, gasp, gag, cough, hack... I can't even say it, but if you're one of those year-round Christmas types, you can celebrate by going out and putting a Horton Bulb on one of your hanging begonia baskets.

"Christmas in July" or not, it's Saturday, so go out there and make it a great weekend.

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Friday, July 24, 2009


EJ and Nicole lie in bed. EJ brings up the touchy subject of Nicole's paranoia now that he got what he wanted. "Look at me," says EJ, "You're not Sydney's mother."

Please speak up if you bought that.

***~~***~~~*** Crickets ***~~~***~~~***

That's what I thought.

Sami comes out of the kids' room, "It took four Ambien each, but they're finally asleep."

"Good," says Rafe, "Now that they're down I have time to work on my surprise." We pan back to see a room full of candles. Rafe says if they couldn't have a picnic today they can have one tonight. Sami flashes back to meeting Meredith and apologizes for cutting the picnic short, "I don't need surprises. I just need you."

Rafe says, "Say what they will, you're a woman of modest needs."

Phillip lets Stephanie in and fills her in on Chloe's situation.

Daniel eyes Kate, "I didn't poison Chloe, but I know who did." Kate stares.

Daniel says Kate came to see him and begged him to do one more show, "And how would leucocystine wind up in my apartment?"

"I just figured Luke O. Sistine broke in," says Bo, "But don't worry. The SPD picked him up. The SPD always gets its man."

"Kate planted the drug in my apartment," claims Daniel, "Chloe and I hurt her son and ever since we were together Kate has had a strange jealous streak. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and a woman scorned hath no fury like Kate. She decided to make us pay." Kate watches.

EJ 'splains his stupid 'You're not Sydney's mother' remark: "Sydney's mother is a calm rational person. You used to be those things but are now looking for danger around every corner just like the DOOL writers are grabbing at straws around every corner."

"You're trying to make something out of nothing," says Nicole, "so stop staring at my boobs." EJ tells her he spoke to Stefano about this.

Sami and Rafe munch on each other for the main course at their picnic. Rafe senses something is wrong. For God's sake, Rafe, it's Sami. Something is always wrong.

Bo and Hope decide they want to talk to Kate. Kate is indignant. She says she can't believe she used to care so much for Daniel. She and Daniel argue about who has the most motive to dechloetize the world. "I'm telling you, even though Daniel and Chloe had an affair I hold no grudge at all against the filthy little two-timing whore. No way did I want to see this happen."

Stephanie can't believe Daniel would have poisoned Chloe. Phillip wants to drop it and change the subject. Stephanie says she is there to set the story straight before word gets out about her fight with Melanie. She says she now knows Phillip and Melanie didn't sleep together so she came to apologize.

Melanie arrives at the hospital and finds Nathan and Maggie. Maggie warns her not to eat anything from her kitchen. Melanie offers to clean the place up when she gets back there. Maggie leaves. Nathan and Melanie stare at each other.

Meanwhile, back in Maggie's kitchen, Mickey and Mia sit at the kitchen table and wolf down brownies. Mia asks, "Do these brownies taste a little strange?"

"Yes, they do," says Mickey, "But I'm really hungry. Let's have another."

Outside in the waiting area, Maggie watches as Daniel and Kate continue to argue. Bo backs Daniel off. Mega-Mouth Maggie seizes the opportunity to drop one of her famous bombshells, "We can't make the same mistake I made when I told Lucas about Daniel and Chloe's affair."

Bo's head explodes, "WHAT?"

Maggie tells them about that evening and how Lucas forgot everything. Bo wonders if Lucas really forgot. Now that she's stirred up a hornet's nest, Maggie excuses herself. Kate steps up and defends Lucas as Bo accuses him. "Lucas has a history of taking things into his own hands," says Bo, "Ask EJ DiMera." Kate says she knows for a fact Lucas didn't do it. "Meaning you know who did," asks Bo.

Sami insists nothing is wrong. That's good enough for the Rafester, who is now interested in other things and moves in for some dessert.

EJ says Stefano convinced him it was understandable for Nicole to be so upset by Grace's death. He doesn't think Grace's death has affected his behavior as much as it affected Nicole's, however. Nicole reminds him he's had some pretty dark days lately. "It's logical," says EJ, "Look who I'm married to. But I know you're in a lot of pain, and I want to know why."

"You're sitting on my hand."

Stephanie again waffles about her on-again off-again relationship with Phillip.

Kate says she can't say who poisoned Chloe but can say that Lucas didn't. She can't believe they are ignoring their prime suspect.

Brady asks Maggie what he can do. Maggie doesn't know. She falls apart and Brady offers support.

Lexie comes out and says Chloe isn't responding as well as before. She wants a family member to go in and be with her. Kate volunteers and Daniel goes off the deep end. Hope assures him it will be OK.

"I don't know why Daniel thinks I'm such a monster," says Kate. She goes in.

Bo walks over to Daniel and puts a hand on his shoulder, "Take a breath."

"Take a hike."

Melanie primps as Nathan comes into the locker room. She apologizes for bugging out on their date. Nathan accepts but says the apology isn't necessary. He asks if they are going to reschedule. Melanie is shocked that he still wants to go out with her, but quickly agrees.

"Hey," says Nathan, "I'm not passing up a free meal."

Stephanie wishes she could take back some of the things she's said. She isn't the only one who wishes she would keep her mouth shut. Stephanie looks into Phillip's eyes, "I'm still in love with you."

Phillip asks, "What do you want to do about that?" Closer... Closer... Closer...


Brady comes up to see Bo and Hope and says he talked to Craig and Nancy. "What did they say," asks Hope.

"They said they hadn't seen her in five years, so why should they start caring about her now."

Daniel asks to talk to Brady. He asks him to go in and talk to Chloe, "Tell her we all just want her to wake up. And get that bitch Kate away from her."

Inside, Kate asks Chloe to fight, "You have everything to live for." She looks around to make sure no one can hear, "Actually that's not true. Nobody loves you. You have no friends. So just let go."

Out in the audience, Beulah turns to Maude, "I can't believe it. Kate finally got something right."

Sami and Rafe lounge around. Rafe goes to the kitchen to get something as Sami gets a call. It's Roman saying he has more info on Meredith. He says he knows she's staying at the Salem Inn, "In fact, it's quite a coincidence. She's in the same room you got caught in with Brandon the night before one of your many weddings." Roman wants to know why Sami wants this. Sami quickly hags up as Rafe comes in with a tray.

Rafe comes in carrying a tray. He takes a confectionery delight off and hands it to Sami. "What's this," she asks.

"It's a s'more."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Cause s'more is what I want."

EJ, on the other hand, isn't getting s'more. Nicole says she is tired of constantly being told she's lying, "It's obvious what's really going on here. It's called projection. That's when you accuse others of doing what you are doing. You say I'm obsessed, but I'm not. You are. Why does everything always come back to Sami. When are you finally going to let go?"

"After I get s'more."

Henderson interrupts Stephanie and Phillip's almost, somewhat, near-kiss, "Your brother's plane touches down in two hours." He leaves and Phillip tells Stephanie Henderson saved her from something she'd regret.

Daniel continues to beg Brady to go in and give Chloe a pep talk. Brady goes inside. Kate sees him and changes her tune. "Hang in there," says Kate. Then she gets close to Chloe's ear and whispers, "or not." Kate gets up and walks to the other side of the room. Brady sits down and tells Chloe she has to be strong.

Maude turns to Beulah, "We are the ones who have to be strong."

EJ rants, "First you seduce me and then you bring up Samantha."

Nicole claims that isn't what this was about, "When you proposed I had no illusions. It was because I was pregnant."

EJ consults the Guy Manual, "Deny that one with all you've got."

"No," says EJ, "I was in love with you."

"Then you found out about Grace," says Nicole, "If you had found out Sami was pregnant earlier what would have happened?"

"I would still have wanted to marry you," says EJ.

Nicole doesn't buy it, "No, you wouldn't have."

"You think I still have feelings for Samantha," says EJ. He assures her she is the one he wanted to marry and moves in for s'more.

Rafe stuffs another s'more down Sami's throat. The icky goo gets all over him but Sami seems to come out unscathed. Rafe asks, "How do you keep your hands clean?"

"I'm a lady."

"And I'm the King of Prussia."

Suddenly Sami spies the phone across the room and says she has to go to the pub. She rushes off. Rafe stares.

Yogi Bear walks up, "Say, I could not help but notice, you've still got a full pic-a-nic basket!"

Rafe offers him some and Yogi goes to work on it. "I can't believe it," says Rafe, "You just conned me out of my picnic basket. How did you do that?"

"I'm smarter than the av-a-rage bear," says Yogi.

"That's more than I can say," sighs Rafe.

Stephanie says she wouldn't have regretted kissing Phillip. Phillip tells her he doesn't love Melanie, "But if I had slept with her I wouldn't have had anything to apologize for, because you dumped me."

Brady tries to encourage Chloe back to consciousness. Chloe twitches and squeezes his hand.

Bo tells Daniel not to leave town. Brady rushes out and makes the big announcement, "Chloe just squeezed my hand!" Daniel rushes toward her room.

Stephanie says, "I don't want this to be goodbye. So... we're friends."

"No matter how we feel," asks Phillip. Stephanie leaves. Phillip chases, but lets her go.

Rafe cleans up. Roman comes to the door and Rafe tells him Sami's out on an errand. Roman says, "I got some questions that need some answers."

Meredith wanders by the docks. Sami just happens to find her, "I'm glad I ran into you."

Nicole bounces Sydney around the bed now that she's done bouncing EJ around the bed, "You're the sweetest baby in the whole wide world... yes you are... yes you are!"

EJ wakes up and looks up at Nicole to find...


Sami looks over at EJ and smiles, "She's the sweetest baby in the whole wide world, isn't she?"

EJ pops out of it. Nicole asks, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," insists EJ. Nicole goes back to sleep. EJ stares.

An Ejami stands up out in the audience and screams, "THAT WAS IT? THAT WAS THE BIG DREAM SCENE WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR?" That does it. In unison, the Ejamis in the audience stand and scream for justice as they hurl a barrage of rotten tomatoes, rotten eggs and buffalo wing bones at the set. Things get out of control. What history will remember as the great Ejami uprising of 2009 is just getting started...

Lexie says Chloe's hand squeeze isn't anything to get excited about. Daniel tells Bo and Hope he can reach her. A cop comes in with a forensics report. Bo reads and says the vile vial had Daniel's fingerprints on it. Daniel denies as Kate flashes back to rigging the bottle. Bo tells Daniel to call a lawyer, "You're coming with me down to the station." Daniel refuses to leave Chloe. He completely freaks and claims Kate will go back into the room and hurt Chloe.

The background music swells, Diddleie-diddleie-diddleie-diddleie-diddleie. They haul Daniel out screaming. Kate smiles.

Meanwhile, the rotten tomatoes continue to pelt the stage. A producer comes out and tries to calm the Ejami crowd, "People... people... you got your dream. What more did you want?"

All together, the Ejamis yell, "We wanted..."

"S'more! "

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Thursday, July 23, 2009

So Malicious... So Evil

Nicole stands on her porch, calls Mia and leaves a message asking her to come back to the mansion ASAP.

Inside, EJ gives the butler instructions to give the staff the night off so he and Nicole can be alone this evening, "And take those irritating kids with you."

Nicole calls Mia again. She wants to know if she's heard from Chad.

At the pub, Stephanie tells Melanie she has a problem with her and Phillip.

Phillip stands in his den and swills liquor. He rants about Stephanie and throws the glass against the wall. Brady comes in, "Are you in a bad mood or are you christening the house?"

The cops hold Daniel back as he screams. Everyone watches as Lexie attempts to revive Chloe. She opens her favorite book, Medicine 101, and reads the instructions, "Step 1..."

Lexie barks orders, "Get me that electrical thingie! " The crash cart team rolls the defibrillator up and Lexie goes to work.


Kate stands outside and watches, "She has to make it."

Nicole is on the phone again leaving yet another message for Mia and grilling her about whether or not she told Chad about the baby. She wanders around the room as she talks and suddenly... HORROR OF HORRORS! She finds Sydney in her playpen.

Stephanie gives Melanie the third degree about her evening with Phillip, "Judging by your bedhead it looks like you and Phillip had a ball tonight! You pathetic little slut!"

That does it! Melanie hauls off and...


Clueless Stephanie holds her cheek and gives Melanie a look that says, "What on earth did you do that for?"

Lexie continues to work on Chloe. Maggie wails and prays. Daniel screams. Everyone degenerates into "If you can't act, be loud" mode.


Unfortunately, all the clearing and zapping doesn't work. Chloe flatlines. Daniel screams his love and begs her to live, "CHLOE! Come back to me." He continues to scream, and scream, and scream, and scream... you get the idea. As his blithering reaches crescendo level... MIRACLE OF MIRACLES, WE GET A HEARTBEAT!

Daniel turns to the cops who are holding him, "Could you excuse me for a minute? I have to go part the red sea and change some water into wine."

Phillip goes into the stretch and checks the runner on first. He rares back and fires... NO! Brady grabs his arm just as Phillip is about to throw and stops him. An umpire runs up, calls a balk and awards the runner second base.

Phillip is livid, "That's not a balk! He grabbed my arm! You're blind, ump!"

The umpire screams, "You talk back to me one more time and I'll toss you outta here. Arianna talked back to me and you know what happened to her. They tossed her out like yesterday's garbage. There are a lot more out of work actors on the Passions set just waiting to replace you guys."

In keeping with the trend set by recent cast changes, NBC has announced it will be changing the show title "Days Of Our Lives" to "Passions Part Deux."

Brady says, "Let me guess... This is about a certain woman."

Phillip says, "Make that two women."


Melanie and Stephanie face off. Do Not Forsake Me Oh My Darlin' plays in the background. The audience chants, "CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT!"

Melanie denies sleeping with Phillip. She wonders if that is why Nathan blew her off. Stephanie says she told Nate to stay away from her. Melanie reminds Stephanie she is the one who left Phillip and Melanie tried to get them back to her.

Stephanie asks, "Why would I trust a conniving whore like you?"

Melanie screams, "You have crossed the line!"

The audience wants blood, "CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT!"

Nicole frets. EJ walks in, "What's going on?"

"It's Sydney," snivels Nicole.

Phillip tells Brady he not only blew it with Stephanie but also Melanie. He denies being drunk as Brady lectures. Phillip vows it won't happen again, "I'm swearing off women." Brady says he doesn't believe it and leaves.

Nicole tells EJ she is upset because Sydney was alone in her playpen.

Bo comes into Chloe's room. Lexie gives him an update and he leaves. I ask you, folks, where else can you find drama this intense?

It's high noon in the pub. Melanie rants, "You of all people should know what I went through as a child!" Stephanie says she knows Melanie had a terrible childhood and backs off. Melanie insists all she wanted was to have Phillip as her friend and not drive drunk. She turns to run out, but bumps into Brady. The needle on the Sob-O-Meter melts and black smoke pours out of it.

Maggie thinks this was a miracle. Kate isn't so enthused. She goes to call Phillip. Bo tells Daniel to calm down because he has more questions, "I suggest you call a lawyer."

"I'll call Mickey," says Daniel.

"No," says Bo, "I meant a lawyer who can do you some good."

Kate announces Phillip is on his way. "I'm just happy Chloe is still with us," blubbers Maggie.

That makes one of us.

Hearing that, Kate spills her coffee. Lexie comes out and Maggie thanks her for saving Chloe's life. Lexie says she can't take credit for that, "It was Daniel's miracle that saved her. Until he spoke up, thanks to me, Chloe was dead as a hammer."

Kate asks, "What about her prognosis?"

"Uh," says Lexie, "All of her major organs are fine. But there is a chance Chloe might never recover." Lexie leaves. Maggie beats herself up for judging Chloe. Kate encourages her. Maggie leaves. Kate waits for more news.

In the locker room Daniel asks if Bo really thinks he did this. Lexie interrupts, "I just want you to know, Chloe is stable."

"Now that's a miracle," says Bo.

Daniel rattles through a litany of medical procedures they should try next He starts to go with Lexie but Bo stops him and tells him to call a lawyer, "I'm your friend. I want to help you. But in order to do that, I need answers."

"I can see through your game," says Daniel, "You're playing good-cop/bad-cop with me."

"No," says Bo, "There are no good cops on the SPD."

Melanie falls apart. Brady asks what's going on. Melanie fills him in. He suggests Melanie tell Stephanie exactly what happened between her and Phillip.

EJ wonders why Nicole went off the deep end about the fact Sydney was in her crib. Nicole says, "She was alone. Someone could have just walked in here and taken her."

"That's ridiculous," says EJ, "No Hoodlum is ever going to waltz into a mansion and kidnap a baby."

"Ask Charles Lindbergh about that," says Nicole, "I want Mary fired for leaving Sydney alone."

Phillip meets Kate at the hospital. Kate brings him up to date on things, "Chloe is in a coma and there is no brain activity."

"Thank God she's all right," says Phillip.

"Lexie is in with her right now," says Kate.

"I'll notify the funeral home to come for a pickup" says Phillip.

Phillip asks how this happened, "She was poisoned," says Kate, "The brownies on the set were tainted."

"Those little sluts," says Phillip, "What's becoming of kids today?"

Hope comes into the locker room, "The druggist informs me leukocystine was picked up at his pharmacy by a Caucasian male."

"Good," says Bo, "At least we've nabbed Luke O. Sistine."

"A Caucasian male," repeats Daniel, "There must be a thousand guys who fit that description."

"Four point two billion to be exact," says Hope.

Bo shows Daniel the leukocystine prescription, "Is this your handwriting?"

EJ insists Mary is trustworthy and refuses to fire her. Nicole remains upset. EJ defends Mary and says he told her she could take a phone call from her sick mother. EJ wants to know what's behind all this. Nicole insists it's nothing and everything is fine. EJ presses. Nicole says she was watching a movie about a kidnapping and got a little paranoid. Things thaw and Nicole says she will try to relax.

Melanie whines, "Phillip made a pass at me, but I said no because he's just looking for someone to fill the void."

"In other words," says Stephanie, "You're saying this is all about his mind."

Melanie fires up the afterburners on her crying, "For the first time in my life friendship means more to me than some guy."

Nathan finds Maggie outside crying. Maggie tells him about Chloe. Nathan is sympathetic. Maggie tells him no one has been able to contact Lucas, "The poor soul doesn't know anything."

"Everybody knows that about Lucas."

Maggie says they now know Chloe was poisoned. She also tells him they are accusing Daniel of poisoning her. "My kitchen is all cordoned off. I don't even know if we can get in the place. If we go back to the house, don't eat anything."

"That's good advice even when things aren't poisoned," says Nathan. They hug and part. Nathan stares.

Kate tells Phillip this is her fault because she insisted Chloe do a segment on food, "I don't understand how anyone could be so malicious... So evil."

Daniel says the writing is similar to his, but claims he didn't write the prescription. Bo wonders how the vile vial wound up in his apartment, "Was anyone in your apartment this past week?"

Daniel hesitates, "I don't know... OMG!"

Nicole comes back in with a baby monitor. She says they have both been under stress, so she suggests they use the rumpus room for its intended rumpusing purpose.

Melanie whines like a cat with its tail caught in a blender and says she considers Stephanie her friend. Stephanie apologizes and the whole thing degenerates into a sickening mutual admiration society. Brady decides his work is done here so he leaves.

Maggie joins Phillip and Kate and says Bo and Hope are working Daniel over. Maggie fills Phillip in on why they are accusing Daniel.

Daniel tells Bo and Hope he asked Lucas to have someone drop by his apartment and pick up his suit.

Bo drops the bombshell, "Chloe and Lucas picked up your suit."

Daniel explodes, "Then why aren't you questioning Lucas?" Hope tells Daniel Chloe had made it clear she didn't want Daniel around. Bo wonders why she would say that if she were going to leave Lucas for Daniel.

EJ and Nicole have moved their rumpusing activities to the bedroom. We go through a bit of giggly pillow talk. The giggling stops and things get serious.

Brady comes back to the pub and sits with Melanie. Melanie gets a call from the hospital and learns about Chloe. She tells Brady someone tried to kill her. "About time," says Brady.

Kate over-defends Daniel. Maggie says, "Chloe is lucky to have you for a mother in law."

"I had to fill in," says Kate, "The bride of Frankenstein wasn't available." Maggie leaves to call Mickey and Phillip goes to check on Lucas.

Daniel screams, "No more questions! I'm done with all this!" Hope brings up the poisoned apple.

"I ordered the fruit basket," says Daniel, "But I didn't make it up myself."

"Someone did," says Bo, "Someone who wanted Chloe dead."

"That narrows it down to the entire town of Salem and all the viewers," says Hope.

EJ and Nicole smooch but Nicole's cell phone sitting across the room distracts her. EJ asks if Nicole is expecting a phone call. She claims she's not. EJ wonders why she keeps looking at her phone.

Phillip returns home. He asks Henderson to check the airline and see if he can track Lucas down. Henderson leaves. The doorbell rings. Phillip answers. Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water... STEPHANIE!

Brady says he still cares about Chloe, but they are just friends now, though. Melanie thinks he should go to the hospital, so they head out together.

Lexie encourages Chloe to keep fighting. Lexie is better at encouraging people than she is at practicing medicine.

Kate tells Maggie she's really not holding up well, "This is going to affect so many lives. I want this nightmare to end."

A gal in the audience yells, "You're not the only one!" Kate walks off.

Bo, Hope and Daniel come into the waiting area. Bo thinks someone else must have had motive to want to kill Chloe.

Daniel flashes back to Kate telling him she knows about the affair. Then he flashes back to the time when Chloe was about to eat the apple. Kate comes in. Daniel walks toward her and they have a staredown.

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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Two-Faced Bitch

Salem Hospital: Where they bring patients in kicking and screaming, but roll them out gently and peacefully on gurney's headed for the morgue. Hope tells Maggie and Kate the cops found damning evidence in Daniel's apartment. After discussing the situation, she tells them she can't discuss it. Kate flashes back to dumping the contents of the vile vial into the food. She pops back to this sad excuse for reality and the alligator tears flow.

Inside Chloe's room, Daniel begs her to snap out of it.

Stephanie finds Nathan at the pub. She grills him about Melanie and figures out she stood him up.

At the cabin, Melanie is concerned about Phillip being drunk. The sot grabs her and slams her back into the table. Melanie pants, "What re you doing?"

"Giving you what you want."

Daniel continues to beg Chloe to fight. Kate watches through the window, "Let go Chloe, just die."

Will asks Mia what she was writing about. She is distant and he says she looks upset. Mia admits that, "You've been so good to me you deserve to know everything."

Bo arrives at the hospital. Hope tells him leukocystine poisoned Chloe. Bo seethes. He just doesn't see how Daniel could be involved in something so dastardly.

Kate thanks Maggie for being there. "I have to be here," says Maggie, "Things are getting too juicy to miss this story." Kate forgives her for blabbing about Chloe and Daniel's affair. "Thanks," says Maggie, "I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to drop that bomb." Kate says she hasn't been able to reach Lucas and doesn't know how she will tell him the awful news if she does get hold of him. Maggie is surprised Daniel is still inside with Chloe, all things considered. She hopes he's not responsible for this, though.

Daniel vows to stay by Chloe's side. Bo comes into the room. "You can't be in here," says Lexie.

"Police business," says Bo, "I have to question Daniel. Delighted Kate watches through the window and smirks.

Nate tells Stephanie about getting called back to the hospital earlier. St. Stephanie says she feels compelled to tell him a few things about Melanie.

Back at the cabin, Melanie and Phillip come up for air. Melanie decides they can't do the nasty. Phillip swears this isn't a rebound thing. "It's more than that," whines Melanie, "There's kinda somebody else."

Daniel refuses to go with Bo. Bo tells him he doesn't have a choice. ex-Chief of Staph Lexie reminds Daniel she's still his boss and orders lowly Dr. Daniel to go. He and Bo go outside.

The girls watch Bo haul Daniel off and wonder what's up. Hope says he's going to question Daniel and she has some questions for them.

"This is so cool," says Maggie, "Having you and Bo here doing this investigation together is just like having Nick and Nora Charles at the scene. Only... they actually solved crimes."

Mia hems and haws. She tells Will she did things at Salem West she's not proud of. "I know," says Will, "You got involved in drugs."

Mia hesitates, "There's something else about me." Chad jogs up.

Daniel rolls through his history with Chloe for Bo. He insists he accepted Chloe's relationship with Lucas, but his feelings for her didn't change. He also says after Chloe and Lucas were married they were tempted, but Chloe was never unfaithful. He says Chloe told him today she's going to leave Lucas. Bo is skeptical. Daniel insists he's sure about that. Bo smirks and says he heard a conflicting story.

Hope questions Kate. She wonders why Daniel would decide to leave town so abruptly. "He had groped all the women and Salem and had to move on," says Kate. Maggie does what Maggie does best. She butts in and tells Hope what Chris said. Hope establishes that things on the set were strained.

Out of the blue, Kate wails, "This is completely my fault. I'm responsible."

"That's commendable," says Hope, "It's rare to find a responsible person in Salem."

Chad says he's training for cross country. He asks Will if he's involved in any sports. Will tells him he plays baseball. "Oh, that's right," taunts Chad, "Didn't you go 0 for 3 in the playoff game?" Will gets a call. Chad keeps it up, "Well, the Chicago Cubs are calling, slugger. With your talent, you might want to set your sights on a team like the Washington Nationals."

Will walks off and Mia flashes back to the hot back seat romp with Chad. She asks Chad to leave her alone. Chad says, "I met your rehab counselor... Nicole, who also told me to stay away from you. But you know what? I can't."

Bo tells Daniel about the phone call Maggie got, "You threatened Chloe." Bo establishes that Chloe and Daniel were alone on the set earlier and that they made the whole cast and crew stand outside right before Chloe collapsed.

Daniel asks, "What the hell is going on here?"

Bo asks, "Why don't you tell me?"

Kate says it's her fault because she pushed Daniel and Chloe into doing the show even though they had had an affair. Lexie overhears, "Daniel and Chloe were lovers? Well that makes sense. Chloe wanted me to keep Daniel away from her."

Hope gasps, "SHE WHAT?"

"Yeah," says Lexie, "She didn't want him anywhere near her."

Nathan says he already knows about Melanie but wants to make up his own mind about her. Stephanie apologizes, "I'm sorry I was gossipy, immature and an idiot."

"We can't help what we are," says Nathan. He tells Stephanie Melanie left with Phillip.

Stephanie asks, "So you're saying Melanie stood you up for Phillip?"

Phillip says he didn't see that coming. "He's a doctor," says Melanie, "Are you jealous? He's funny, comes from a good family and is very handsome. He's one of the reasons I stayed in Salem. I now, you think I'm in over my head."

"You're over your head in the baby pool," says Phillip.

"We were in the middle of a date when you showed up," says Melanie.

Chad tells Mia he's trying to apologize. He thinks it's his fault she got hooked on drugs and asks for another chance.

Mia huffs, "Are you for real?"

Chad says, "At least think about it."

Will walks up, "Think about what?"

Daniel insists there is a mistake. He wants to get back to Chloe and says he'll take Bo's pancreas back if he doesn't let him go. They talk about leukocystine. "It can only be administered by a doctor," says Daniel.

Bo pounces on that, "Someone like yourself?"

Lexie tells Hope about Chloe repeating over and over that she didn't want Daniel around. Hope takes her aside and asks to talk to Chloe. Lexie tells her Chloe might not make it.

Chloe vegetates...

Nate says Arianna saw Melanie and Phillip leave and told him about it. Stephanie takes back all the good things she said about Melanie.

Melanie says, "I came here with you because you needed me."

"I do," says Phillip, "but you brought that to a screeching halt."

Melanie snorts, "Not every girl in Salem wants to jump your bones, tungsten and plastic. I was once attracted to you but now I'm over it and we are just friends. Despite what everyone thinks I have a heart."

"Mine's artificial," says Phillip. Melanie stomps out.

Kate says she still hasn't been able to contact Lucas. She talks about what might have been with Chloe and Lucas, "And even if Chloe pulls through he'll find out about the affair."

"Please let me be the one to tell him," begs Maggie, "I'm going to go call... uh... what's my husband's name again? "

Daniel wonders where this is going. Bo says, "Chloe was poisoned and we found the poison in your apartment."


Chad says he was just asking Mia to trade shifts at work. He apologizes about the baseball crack and leaves.

Will sneers, "The guy's an ass. Too bad you have to work with him."

Mia says, "There is something you should know. Chad and I didn't just date. We were... together... really TOGETHER."

Phillip and Melanie are back at the pier. A tow truck beside them uses its wench to pull Phillip's new Ferrari GT out of the water. Phillip offers a ride, but Melanie decides to walk and Phillip apologizes about everything that happened. They agree to keep their rendezvous quiet. Melanie says, "What just happened... I can't figure out if it was real or you were drunk or what. If it was real, you have to be totally over her before it ever happens again."

"I know you have a heart," says Phillip, "Back at the cabin I was just trying to feel around for it to make sure." Melanie walks off.

Nathan gets another page and says he has to go back to the hospital. Stephanie tells him he has a right to be involved with whomever he wants. Nate leaves. Outside, he runs into Melanie, but tells her he has to go back to the hospital.

Hope continues to grill Lexie. Lexie tells her about the other tainted food and the poisoned apple. Kate steps in and says the apple came from Daniel's housewarming gift.


A what?

"What are you accusing me of," screams Daniel, "I would never hurt Chloe." Bo tells Daniel he's a suspect and has to stay away from Chloe. Daniel freaks and tells Bo he has to let him do his job.

Will is as clueless as his father, "Together?"


"So that's the big secret," asks Loserclueless Jr, "you went out?" Mia assures him it's over. "You had a boyfriend," says Will, "so what?"

Inside the pub, Stephanie gets all over Melanie. "You two-faced bitch. Pretending to be my friend and making a big deal about saving my life. And all the time what you wanted was two-faced Phillip."

Phillip staggers back into the den at the Kiriakis mansion. He pours a drink, obsesses over Stephanie and flings the glass into the fireplace.

Lexie says, "This just doesn't make sense."

"It's DOOL," says Hope, "what do you expect?"

Maggie is in the room with Chloe falling apart. Suddenly Chloe's machines sound the alarm. Maggie runs out to get help as the crash cart team runs in. Daniel turns to Bo and asks to go in. the cops hold him back. Bo says, "It's for your own good, man."

Inside, Lexie pumps on Chloe's chest. Outside, Daniel screams, "CHLOE... CHLOE..."



Ah,yes... Luke O. Sistine... One of the beautiful people.

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Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

I'm Your Worst Nightmare Come To Life

Phillip sits across from Melanie at a table in the pub. He invites Melanie for a spin in his new Ferrari GT. She gets distracted by a text message. It seems Phillip's artificial parts aren't processing the alcohol fast enough and he's drunk. "Why are you readin' when you could be ridin'," he slurs. Melanie decides she wants to go.

Nicole comes downstairs to find Will at the door. "Can Johnny come out and play," he asks. Nicole says Johnny isn't' there. Will decides to stay and talk to Nicole.

Chad gets on Mia's case about cutting her hand and also about her drug rehab story, "I'm trying to figure out when and how you became a liar."

Chloe tells Daniel she's leaving Lucas, "I want to be with you for all the Days Of Our Lives." Ecstatic Daniel moves in on her.

Outside, Chris wants to get back into the kitchen. He knocks on the door,
"He-llooooo! We have to get started, people."

Daniel shouts at the door, tells Chris to shut up and goes in for seconds at the Chloe buffet, "I will never let anything come between us again."

Kate sits on a park bench and plays the fake recording. Maggie listens on the other end of the line. She screams in horror, "Chloe! Are you there?"

Kate finishes and tosses the phone into the trash.

Maggie wails into the phone as Hope comes up. Mags says she thinks something terrible has happened. "What," gasps Hope.

"I think DOOL has been extended for another year." Bo arrives as Maggie continues to snivel.

Daniel and Chloe suck face. They want each other, a fact that is fairly apparent even if you're not watching closely. Chloe decides they have to cool it until Loserclueless gets back.

Chris patters on the door,
"Hellloooo... can I come in?" Daniel opens the door and Chris swooshes in, ""Well my, goodness whatever we were talking about must've been uber-important. Listen up people! let's gooooooooooooooo!"

Chloe stops munching on Daniel and starts munching on the deadly brownies.

Back at the pub, Phillip continues to get increasingly inebriated. Melanie tells him she's on a date. He tells her to break it. She declines. Phillip gets up, swings around and grabs another glass of booze off of a tray Arianna is carrying.

Nathan finds Maggie and Hope, then gets another page. He scoots off as Bo comes back and says he keeps getting Chloe's voicemail when he tries to call her. He tries the land line and Chris answers. "I'd like to peak to Chloe," says Bo.

Chris huffs,
"You and half the world. Sorry buddy."

Bo gets official, "I am with the police and this is official police business."

Chris doesn't buy it,
"You are one sicko fan. You can't use a line like that on me."

Bo hangs up and tells the group, "Some crazy woman answered the phone. She wouldn't let me talk to Chloe because they were taping."

Maggie explains that was Chris but figures if they are taping things are OK, "But Daniel sounded so angry when I overheard him." Bo and Hope decide to check things out.

Chloe insists she is fine. Daniel worries that this may be an infection. Kate rushes in and things get going. Chloe starts her spiel as the cameras roll, but swoons into Daniel's arms. "Quick," he screams, "Call a doctor."

"You're a doctor, Daniel."

"Then call 911," he shouts.

"What's the number?"

Will tells Nicole about running into EJ. He says he thinks Nicole arranged Sami being with Johnny. She insists it was EJ's decision, "Look... I know I wasn't the person I should have been when Lucas and I were together... but, hey $5 mil is $5 mil."

Will thanks her for what she has done with Johnny and tells her he and his mom are doing OK right now, "Especially since we never see each other." Nicole tells him the pain from Grace's death will be there for a long time. Will leaves. Nicole grabs her tummy, stares and breaks down.

Chad pesters Mia. He asks for the name of the rehab center, or her drug dealer, "I want something specific. I want something real."

"If it's reality you want, you'll have to try another show," says Mia, "But I can tell you this... the best part of rehab was you weren't there."

Chad doesn't believe her, "You never touched drugs. This story is lame."

"This is DOOL," says Mia, "What do you expect?" Chad vows to find out what is going on and leaves.

Arianna reminds Phillip the drinks aren't free. Phillip hauls out his wad-o-cash and tosses a big bill on her tray. He starts to leave, but Melanie catches him and pumps him about the number of drinks he's had. She refuses to let him drive and threatens to call the cops. He decides to test her. He yanks his keys out of his pocket, but drops them and Melanie scoops them up. She heads for the door, "Let's go, Phillip."

The group in Maggie's kitchen waits for the ambulance as Chloe lies unconscious and drooling on the floor. Daniel decides he can't wait any longer. He runs into a phone booth, Changes into his Superdoc tights and cape outfit, runs back into the kitchen, scoops her up and flies off with Chloe in his arms.

Nicole comes into the Java Café and finds Mia, who has just finished her fifteen minute shift. She asks Nicole if EJ found out the truth would he be OK with things. Nicole, predictably, wonders what's up. Mia whines, "The father of my... of Sydney." Seriously, you need a scorecard to keep 'em straight.

Daniel wheels Chloe through the nursing area into her room and the staff hauls her into bed. Dr. Daniel goes to work, feeling and groping like crazy. Chloe drifts back to consciousness and Daniel vows never to leave her. Then it's lights out again for Chloe.

Bo and Hope are at Maggie's and Kate and Maggie talk about what just happened. The cops grill the girls and wonder if Daniel has any reason to be angry with Chloe.

Kate turns to Maggie and lets it slip on purpose, "Don't say anything, Maggie." HA! That's like telling a guy who just had the Burrito Humongo at Taco Bell not to pass gas.

Bo warns them, "You do realize this is turning into a police investigation."

Maggie asks, "Shall I order donuts? " She turns to Kate and says they have to tell, then turns back to Bo and Hope and tells them Daniel and Chloe had an affair.

Phillip and Melanie arrive at the Horton cabin. "I'm sorry," says Melanie, "I though a Ferrari was one of those cars you can drive right into the water."

"Don't worry," says Phillip, "I can afford another one."
Phillip is totally soused and Melanie figures she should take him home. He wants to stay but she says she knows this whole thing is about Stephanie. "You should know something," says Phillip.

Melanie says, "Well, there's a first time for everything."

Mia tells Nicole about Chad, "Chad isn't like Will. He never stops until he gets what he wants. Including me.

Nicole is deadly serious, "I want to know everything about this boy. Let's start with the basics... boxers or briefs? "

"What's the point," whines Mia, "What can you do?"

"I can fix this."

Kate tells Bo and Hope the affair has ended. Then she gets on Maggie for yapping. Maggie reminds her she heard the threat, but Kate defends Daniel. Chris steps in and tells them Daniel made everyone wait while he talked to Chloe and when he got back inside Chloe looked awful. Kate goes over the top defending Daniel.

Back at the hospital, Daniel comforts Chloe. Chloe says, "My head is spinning."

"That's a good thing," says Daniel, "I didn't know your head was capable of doing anything." Daniel vows to keep a close eye on her and asks if she was eating or drinking before the taping. She says she ate some of the brownies in Maggie's kitchen. Doom and destruction music plays in the background.

Bo makes a decision, "I'm going down to the lab and check out the brownies."

"Aren't they a little young for you," asks Maggie. Kate tells him Daniel has quit the show and will leave town. Bo huffs.

Daniel instructs the nurse to call Bo and tell him he suspects they are dealing with an ingested substance.

Suddenly, Chloe starts rattling around in her bed like a poor imitation of the schlocky acting in Exorcist XXVII.

Phillip rants about Stephanie not being able to deal with who he is, "Part of me will always love her. Unfortunately, those are my fake parts, so I'm moving on."

Melanie gasps, "Are you saying... we..."

Phillip slurs, "You tell me."

Chloe rattles like a jackhammer on steroids. Finally she calms down and mumbles. Daniel tells her she had a seizure and instructs her to get some sleep. Her machine goes berserk as her blood pressure drops. SuperDan goes into action. Maxine calls out her BP numbers, "She's gonna code!"

Daniel screams, "No she's not! She will not code. I won't lose her."


Bo decides to get CSI Salem over to Daniel's apartment toot sweet. He leaves. Hope gets a call and says she has to go to the hospital. She leaves. Kate huffs, then she turns away and smirks like the Cheshire Cat.

Chloe's blood pressure continues to drop. Daniel continues to call her name.

Mia sits on the park bench and types her journal into her laptop. Will finds her and asks what's going on.

Chad jogs past Nicole and she calls out to him. He stops, "Who are you."

"I'm your worst nightmare come to life."

Nathan comes back to the pub and Arianna tells him Melanie left with Phillip.

Melanie thinks she should take Phillip home. She tells him she's not going to stand around and be his rebound girl. Phillip is ready for action. Closer... closer... kiss.

Chloe's BP starts to rise. Things are looking up until Lexie comes into the room. Just Lexie's presence kills off most patients. She tells Daniel, "I have news that changes everything."

The cops search Daniel's apartment. Bo calls for a warrant. One of the cops asks him, "Aren't you supposed to have a warrant BEFORE you enter someone's home?"

Bo snarles, "Are you wasting valuable time reading the constitution again?"

A guy with a CSI jacket comes up and hands Bo a baggie with something in it. "What is it," asks Bo.

"It's a baggie with something in it," says the CSI guy.

Bo reads the label, "Leukocystine. Hmmm... Luke O. Sistine. I think that's the guy they named that chapel for in Rome."

Nicole and Chad talk. She tells him he is the reason Mia was doing drugs, "Do you think your mom would get her appointment to the federal bench if this came out?"

Chad gasps, "How do you know about that?"

"Never mind how I know," says Nicole, "You will stop bothering Mia and shut up about her life, or you'll go to that military academy at the bottom of Alabama." Nicole grins at him.

Mia tells Will there is nothing going on. Will digs and Mia tells him she's upset, "You've been so good to me. You deserve to know everything. And I'll even act like I'm going to tell you everything, but there's not a snowball's chance in hell I actually will."

Melanie pulls away. Phillip apologizes for being inconsiderate and forward. Melanie is skeptical, "Do you really mean it?"

"You know I don't," he slurs. He slams her onto the table and goes for the gold.

Bo is on the phone with Hope telling her about Luke O. Sistine.

Kate and Maggie stand by the nurses' station. Kate tells Maggie she is baffled by this. Maggie wonders why Daniel would hurt Chloe. Kate says, "When a person gets really angry you never what he will do."

Lexie tells Daniel they found leukocystine. Daniel gasps and orders the proper protocol. Lexie tells him the police are involved. Daniel says, "They should be under the circumstances."

Outside, Hope tells Kate and Maggie the police may have found damning evidence in Daniel's apartment, "From now on he has to be treated as a suspect."

Inside, Lexie watches as Daniel administers some sort of Anti-Luke O. Sistine drug, "Come on... Come on..."

We pan in on Chloe. She wakes for an instant, "Daniel, I can't be with you until this dizziness goes away."

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