Tuesday, July 31, 2007

The Patron Saint Of Coeds

Stephanie is indignant about Patch doing a background check on Jeremy. "Chill, Steph," says Jerkemy.

Patch goes off the deep end, "DON'T TALK TO HER LIKE THAT!"

Stephanie rages on while Jeremy and Patch get into it. Jeremy tries to calm things down, "Let me explain, sir..."

"CUT THE 'SIR' CRAP," screams Patch. He turns to Stephanie, "Pick a category, theft, fraud, identity theft..." She rants and tells him he had no right to do this. Patch says, "Do yourself a favor, baby. Throw this jerk out with the rest of the garbage."

Stephanie asks, "What are you saying? You want us to leave together? "

Jett tells Chelsea it's not easy asking her this, and if he had other options he'd use them. She argues and tells him to go find those other options. He says she can step in and help out or stand by and watch Stephanie get burned, "What's it gonna be, Chelsea?"

Nick looks into Roman's room as Kate comes up. He tells her she is late. "I didn't know I was on the clock," says Kate.

"Shut up," he orders, "I'm doing the talking."

"Uh-oh," says Kate, "I guess the worm has turned."

"No," says Nick, "The worm has arrived." He tells Kate he has just been fired. He came clean and told the hospital authorities about the fake DNA report. He assures Kate no one else knows about her involvement. Kate wonders why he kept her out of it. "I had my reasons," he says.

"So here it comes," says Kate, "What do you want? Another job?"

Nick says, "Do what I want and your secret stays safe, or else I expose you."

"And what do you want," asks Kate.

"The Chelsea, Billie, Kate trifecta," says Nick.

Sami stands over the unconscious Roman and says this is her fault because she wanted to end the feud, "I have to stop them. My dad is the last Brady the DiMeras will ever hurt."

The argument in the pub continues. Patch thinks Jeremy is just trying to make excuses for what he has done. Stephanie tries to defend him but Patch tells her to let Jeremy talk. Jeremy insists he has turned his life around. Stephanie chimes in and says she already knew all of this, "I'm sure there is nothing in the report Jeremy hasn't told me already." Patch drops his jaw. Jeremy wiggles and sweats.

Chelsea insists Stephanie is just along for the ride. Jett says it's a pretty dangerous ride. Chelsea is thrilled he wants to involve her in it. He promises he won't let anyone hurt her. "Except you," she asks, "Hey – are you gonna lie to me again?" He says sometimes his job gets in the way of more important things, like being honest with someone he cares about. He tells her to forget it. She's off the hook. "So what now," she asks, "Are you gonna pout?"

"I have to admit," says Jett, "I'm kind of disappointed." He says Stephanie is in for a fall. Chelsea says she's innocent, but Jett tells her Jeremy could have her involved in illegal things with out her knowing about it, "This happens to girls like her all the time. They're in for a fall and they don't even know it."

Nick hands Kate a box with the $50K in it and says what he wants is for Kate to give it to Chelsea and tell her it's from her. Kate wants to know how Nick got the money. He assures her it's legal, but won't tell her, "Deposit it, write a check, give it to her. You got all that? God, this feels great."

Sami and Belle talk things out. It's pretty much the same as listening to Casey and Yogi talk things out. They wonder how they are going to keep their kids safe from the DiMeras. Sami tells Belle the DNA tests were bogus and the twins are Lucas'. Belle is thrilled, but Sami says all it means is Stefano doesn't want to rip them from her, "All he wants to do now is kill our entire family. It's kill or be killed, Belle. We have to stop them before they get us."

Patch challenges Stephanie. He thinks she's covering for him. Jeremy says he told her a few weeks after they met. "So dating a felon is no big deal to you," he asks.

"If it's a problem for you, then that's your deal," says Stephanie. She says she's an adult and people deserve second chances. She learned that from her mom. The Battle Hymn of the Republic plays in the background as Jeremy waves the flag and insists he has learned his lesson, because he loves Stephanie. He holds out his hand.

Patch ignores it, gets in his face and growls, "You do anything to hurt her and jail will look like a trip to paradise."

"Fair enough," says Jeremy. He decides to leave so Patch and Stephanie can talk things out. Stephanie wants to know why Patch didn't shake Jeremy's hand. He tells her he doesn't like being conned. He says the whole thing was an act.

She accuses him of being a hypocrite, "We should be OK with the fact that you stole John's kidney or put a knife to Uncle Bo's neck on that island. Way to be fair, Dad."

Nick tells Kate how he won the money. She says if he gives it to Chelsea this way he won't get any credit. She wonders if this is a money-laundering scheme. Nick tells her it's just a gift. Kate wonders what he is getting out of this.

"Something you probably won't understand," says Nick, "Peace of mind. It's something I haven't felt in a really long time."

"That's because you lost a big piece of mind when the bomb went off."

Belle tries to talk Sami out of her one-woman vendetta. Marlena walks in and the girls start to whisper. Marlena says she has good news. Roman has been upgraded from critical to stable. She wishes her daughters were stable, too. Sami vows from now on if the DiMeras hurt them, they will hurt the DiMeras back, "The only way we get through this is if we pick off the DiMeras one-by-one, starting with Stefano."

Patch reminds Stephanie his brain was rewired when he did those things. Stephanie insists Jeremy was young when he made his mistakes and he has changed. "I'll treat him like a prince right after you dump him," says Patch.


"You didn't get much from me, but you sure got that stubborn streak," he says, "Thank God you didn't get my looks, though." Stephanie insists she is nothing like Patch. She says Jeremy tried to be a gentleman tonight and Patch rejected him.

"He was positively oozing charm," says Patch, "I admit, I've done some things that make that man look like a saint, but there is what a man does and how he feels about what he does. Jeremy is making a living on someone else's dime." Stephanie says he's jealous because he couldn't cut it. "OK," says Patch, "I've already heard he's a better man." She apologizes for the remark. Patch lectures, "Never be sorry for saying what you think and feel. I know if you stay with Jeremy he's gonna hurt you real bad."

Jett tells Chelsea all she has to do is get Stephanie to talk. He wouldn't ask if he had other options. She says that's a tough decision. If she helps, she wants to quit Touch The Sky. She will be his narc but not work for him and Jeremy any more.

"You are the patron saint of coeds," says Kate. She tells Nick to do it himself. Nick threatens to tell Lucas about the Kate's blackmail. Kate relents and agrees to do it, "What is it they say about a fool and his money?" Nick says this money will help Chelsea with college and he will know he had a part in it. He says he really fears Chelsea turning into someone like Kate. He turns, gets in the elevator, smiles, waves and the doors close.

Marlena doesn't want to hear Sami's plan to bring down Stefano. Sami says her kids won't survive if she doesn't do something about the DiMeras. She states the obvious, "The police haven't been able to do anything." Sami rants on.

"You're upset," says Lucas.

The raging sea that Sami has become calms for a moment, "Actually, I'm not upset at all. I have to protect my children. The best way I can think of is to kill Stefano DiMera." GOOD HEAVENS, WE JUST WENT THROUGH ALL THAT IMPASSIONED ANGST ABOUT HOW THIS SICKCHICK COULDN'T KILL EJ BECAUSE SHE IS NOT A KILLER AND NOW HER NEW HOBBY IS KILLING STEFANO. GMAB! AILEEN WUORNOS HAD FEWER ISSUES.

Scientists today announced the creation of the newest man-made element, Samium, so named because it is so damned unstable.

Stephanie says her mom wouldn't have pulled this stunt tonight. She points out Patch was wanted for murder when they met. He points out he was innocent. Stephanie asks what Kayla's parents thought when she dragged him in to meet them. "I admit," says Patch, "they wondered where she found a bum like me." Stephanie says he said awful things in the mental hospital. No matter how hurt she was, she saw the good in him, and there is good in Jeremy too. She wonders why he can't see it.

Jett says Chelsea can't quit. Jeremy would see through it and get suspicious. "You are using me like Jeremy uses Stephanie," she says.

"It's not the same thing," says Jett.

Kate says to herself, "You win some, you lose some." She hesitates, "And you win some again."

Sami insists she is going to kill Stefano. Marlena and Belle decide this would be a good time to go for coffee. "Bring lots of Prozac when you come back," says Lucas. Sami rants. The only way they will have peace is to get rid of the DiMeras. Lucas says Billie is installing a security system. Sami thinks they will be stuck in their apartment and she is sick of it, "We can fight or hide, AND I WANT TO FIGHT! AND KILL! KILL! I WANT TO KILL! "

Patch says he never would have made it back without Stephanie. He puts his hand on her arm but she jerks away, "You aren't back." Patch says he can't accept Jeremy. Stephanie says everyone in the family accepted Patch when he came back. She believes in Jeremy.

Patch says he doesn't, "I could get over some of the stuff on his rap sheet, but I'm a little hung up on this one right here." He points to the sheet.

Stephanie reads, "Fraud, that's just another word for stealing."

"He set up a scam to get money for kids with cancer," says Patch, "Sick kids. He went to honest people and took their money. You want to know where it went? To a high-end condo and a sports car worth a fortune."

"He's the guy I love."

"Why do you love him?"

"You love Mom," says Stephanie, "This is right."

Patch says Jeremy doesn't come off like a guy looking for a second chance. He comes off like a guy who doesn't think he will get caught again. He asks her to walk away. She says she can't do that, "I have to walk away from you instead." She leaves.

Marlena and Belle talk out in the hall. Marlena notices things are quiet in Roman's room, "Sami is scary when she is quiet." Marlena doesn’t know if Sami will actually go after Stefano. She says Sami is so upset she didn't notice Mount Brady on Belle's finger. Marlena decides to have an engagement party for Belle to help take Sami's mind off of killing people. Belle don' wanna. Marlena wonders if something is wrong. WHAT? WITH BELLE? SOMETHING WRONG WITH BELLE? THAT WOULD BE A REAL SWITCH, WOULDN'T IT? Marlena still cherishes the award she won from NASA for raising a couple of space cadets. "If you're concerned about getting married, this is the time to say something," says Marlena.

"I know you're upset," says Lucas, "But I don't think it's time to break out the Uzis. I promise we will win this." He kisses her. Sami calms down.

Stephanie is on the phone. She cries and tells Chelsea she's fine, "It's just my allergies." She must be allergic to the truth. "I could use a friend right now." Chelsea says she is at the pier. Stephanie tells her not to go anywhere. She says Jeremy is the problem and she will talk when she gets there.

Chelsea hangs up and tells Jett Stephanie is meeting her. He says not to tell Stephanie she knows Jeremy is dirty. Chelsea promises she won't. "After this is over," says Jett, "We can talk about us."

"There is no us," snorts Chelsea, "There never was. I'm just your informant, only I don't get paid and the perks aren't really that good. After you nail Jeremy, I don't ever want to see you again."

Jett takes it well. Who wouldn't? He walks away.

Belle says she loves Shawn but things are tough. Money is tight. They don't have a place of their own and Shawn is happy working at the garage. They won't be able to save money quickly. He wouldn't even go to the interview Phillip set up.

"What are you doing to help," asks Marlena.

"I'm taking care of Claire."

"Many women with kids go back to work," says Marlena.

Belle gasps, "WORK?" She faints.

Sami comes back down from her tantrum. She says she feels better but the twins are kicking. Lucas says that's because their mother is so upset. He tells her to relax. Sami insists she hates the DiMeras. Lucas says the DiMeras hate the Bradys because they never surrender.

BEEEEEEPPP! Roman's machines sound the alarm. Sami ramps it up again and runs around the room blithering in panic. Lucas runs to get the nurse, "I'll get one for Roman, too."

Stephanie and Chelsea talk. Stephanie says Jeremy was perfect at the dinner and her dad was awful. She hates her dad. She tells Chelsea about the background check and Jeremy's record. She says it's all petty stuff and wasn't a secret to her. Stephanie has decided to move out. Chelsea says if she needs anything at all to let her know.

Stephanie smiles, "You kill me, but I love you. See ya." Stephanie leaves.

Chelsea calls Nick, "So... how much do you hate me?"


"I need help and didn't know who else to call."

"Just tell me where you are, and I will be there," says Nick.

The doctor defibrillates Roman, and then Sami. He says Roman has fluid around his heart, "Get him to the OR now!"

Sami runs around screaming like a little girl. Sorry for the redundancy. "They've killed my dad! They've killed my dad!" FF.

In order to become bipolar, how many poles would Sami have to lose?


Jeremy tells Stephanie, "When we do move in together I'm kind of hoping it's as husband and wife."

Chelsea asks, "You would do that for me?" Nick says, "I would do anything for you. Don't you know that by now?"

Marlena asks, "Lucas, what's the matter?" Lucas says, "She took off." Marlena asks, "What do you mean she took off?" Lucas says, "She's gone. I think we both know where she is headed."

Sami 'Rape is bad but murder is just dandy' Brady points a gun at Stefano and says, "I decided it's time for justice so I'm going to start with you, Stefano DiMera."

Monday, July 30, 2007

A Wolf In Sheep Dip

A news reporter stands outside the cop shop reporting on the disembowelment of Roman Brady by the evil Andre DiMera, who fled the scene. Detective Brady, supercop, pillar of the community and henpecked husband muscles his way through the crowd.

Crockett and Tubbs stand by and watch, "Bo may have bungled the setup, but he looks cool with his jacket casually tossed over his shoulder," says Sonny.

The reporters ask Bo for a comment. He tosses his jacket over the camera and snarls, "There's your comment!"

The brat strolls along the dock. It's a beautiful night, but she's all alone, "I hate men. I hate Jeremy and Max and Nick and Jett. Most of all I hate myself." Footsteps approach. It's Jett. He followed her. She says she doesn't need an explanation, "Let's see... Jett's turn on... long walks on the beach, moonlit nights and going after women who are already spoken for." Jett says he wants to set her straight.

Jeremy and Stephanie are late. Patch wants to trade his soft drink for a margarita. Kayla wants him to have a clear head for the meeting, but doesn't know where he can get a new head on such short notice. She tells him she wants him to be nice tonight. He says he asked Bo to run a background check on Jeremy, "If he's a wolf in sheep dip, we'll know soon."

EJ wants to take Sami to the hospital. Sami snivels, "I want my mom!" Lucas says he will get Marlena there soon. He asks what she remembers. Sami says she remembers EJ opening the briefcase and the gas coming out and that's it. Lucas explains what happened after EJ released the gas, "Gas came out of the briefcase, too." EJ says there is still one thing that doesn't make any sense. Why would Stefano kidnap her and then dump her. Sami can't stop thinking about that. She wishes her dad would call and explain what's going on.

Bo leans over Roman's gurney, "Hey, bro, You can't die – we have blowing league tonight."

Roman can barely speak, "I bowled a 93 last week."

"Oh yeah, that's right," says Bo, "I guess you can die if you want."
They wheel him out through the crowd.

Kayla can't believe Patch asked for the background check on Jeremy. Patch says if Jeremy has nothing to hide Patch will sit back and let nature run its course – maybe. To him Stephanie is still a little girl because he missed everything, "I missed her dating and giving her boyfriends the 'you touch my daughter and I'll kill you' staredown. I'm just trying to keep Stephanie safe." Kayla brings up the baby. She has given him the perfect opportunity to raise a second child and he has said no. Apparently his mind is a little more clear than he is letting on.

She thinks the name Patch doesn't work for him anymore, "You used to be held together by spit and grit, but now it's the love of your family that's holding you together."

"When you lay it on, you use the high priced spread," says Patch. She goes over to his side and smooches him.

Chelsea says Jett can go. She thinks she's the most clueless girl in the world. Jett can't disagree, but says he introduced Danielle to Chelsea knowing she was already married. Chelsea says, "Forgive me if I don't want to hear your lame excuses. I want the truth."

Jett says, "The whole thing was a setup and Danielle was in on it. Is that enough truth for you?"

Sami wonders why Stefano let her go. Lucas suggests his horoscope was iffy or maybe his weekly goat sacrifice went bad. EJ thinks it was something else.

"Who asked you," snorts Lucas. EJ thinks Stefano has had a change of heart. "To do that," growls Lucas, "first you gotta have a heart."

EJ thinks Stefano thought this through. He saw the families coming together would end the hostilities. Lucas thinks EJ inhaled more gas than the rest of them. Lucas rambles on. Sami shushes him.

Nick arrives, "I gotta talk to you guys right away." He comes in and tells them he remembered why he was there when the bomb went off, "It's about your babies, Sami."

Jett says he lied to Chelsea. She wonders if he and Danielle are just part of one big liars club. She says she told him about Danielle because he is her friend. Jett tires to clear things up, but she doesn't let him get a word in edgewise. He says he lied because he needed a firewall. He couldn't get involved with her. He insists he was looking out for her. She doesn't buy it and she doesn't care, "If you're gonna let a girl down, go hard on her. It's easier to bounce back that way. Be less of a jerk and more of a man. I used to think Jeremy was the biggest jerk I ever met. I didn't know why you wanted to share his airspace, but I guess you solved that mystery for me."

Patch and Kayla slurp each other like a couple of teenagers at a drive in. Customers lose their appetite and start to leave, but the scene is broken up by Jeremy and Stephanie walking in. Jeremy brings gifts. He has perfume for Kayla, Eau de Sleaze,. He got Patch a blues harp mix. Kayla lets Patch smell her perfume and he chokes.

Stephanie chimes in, "Once you get to know Jeremy you'll love him as much as I do."

"OH I AM TICKLED PINK," says Patch.

Nick says he came to tell the truth then the bomb went off, "I messed up."

With her impeccable timing, Kate busts in, "I heard Sami ran away with EJ." Sami straightens her out. Lucas wants Kate to show a little sympathy. Kate asks Nick what he is doing there. Lucas says he came to tell them something about the babies.

"What," snorts Kate, "This wretched lab rat? I'm sure you don't have anything to say, do you, Nick?"

Jeremy toasts the whole bunch. Patch asks about Touch The Sky. "Everything Jeremy touches turns to gold," says the golden girl. She shows them the expensive necklace he bought for her. Patch doesn't approve of all the partying on the plane. Jeremy asks Patch if he partied when he was their age. Kayla thinks Jeremy has Patch on that one. Jeremy says they have their eyes on the future so he can offer Stephanie the life she deserves.

"What do you think, Papa," asks Stephanie.

"I think money is a great invention and owning a business has its own rewards, but a man's character has to factor in."

"I have a confession to make," says Jeremy, "I've scored as many errors as I have hits, but every time I forget the rules Stephanie reminds me of the man I want to be. It's only one of the reasons I love her so much."

Jett admits he sent mixed signals, but he says he had no choice. He says he wants to protect her, "I'm not the man you think I am. Jeremy Horton is a criminal and I am ISA." He flashes his card.

Sami and Kate argue about Sami's motives. Kate suggests Nick can say his piece at a later time. Everyone in the room except Kate wants to hear now. Nick blurts it out, "Lucas is the father." Kate sucks all the oxygen out of the room.

Nick says the report was wrong. They ask if he is 100% sure. "Well," he says, "There is one chance in 13 billion the tests could be wrong."

"That's enough of an opening for the DOOL writers," says EJ.

Kate says reports could be falsified. Nick asks why he would do that. Kate says he could be incompetent. Sami wants to know how Nick messed up. Nick says he was under pressure and got careless. He ordered a new report. He shows it to them. Lucas looks it over, as if there might be a chance in a million he understands it.

After reading the report, Lucas is convinced. He attacks Sami's tummy, "Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy?"

The twins immediately ask for a second opinion.

Lucas' mood changes. He gets nasty with Nick, "Do you know what you put us through?"

Sami tells him to back off, "I think he was under a lot of pressure from someone."

Chelsea wants to know if the ISA card came from the Liars Shoppe at the mall. Jett says he wanted to tell her from the start. She wonders if he has been pretending to be her friend for the last couple of months, "Was the near kiss an act too?"

Winston Churchill appears on the scene, "Never in the field of human drama has so much been made of so little by so many."

Bo walks into the pub. Patch excuses himself. He and Bo go outside. Bo tells Patch about Roman's knifing, "Andre played me for the fool I am."

"If you beat yourself up every time someone plays you for a fool," says Patch, "You'd walk around looking like a piece of chopped liver."

Bo thinks they should get the whole family over to the hospital, "Also... I got that jacket you wanted on Jeremy. It ain't pretty. Jeremy is bad news. He's a Horton, Hope's family for God's sake." Patch reads it and weeps.

Jett says he felt chemistry for Chelsea from the beginning. He had to hide his affection. He figured if she met the person he is engaged to, that would cool the relationship off. Danielle walks up to them and flashes her own credentials, "Danielle Calder, special agent with the International Security Alliance."

They grill Nick about who pressured him. He says it was his mistake. He got careless in the rush and takes responsibility. Kate says she will talk to his supervisor and he won't lose his job. He asks her not to do that.

Sami says she doesn't believe him, "Look me in the eye and tell me that Kate or EJ didn't have something to do with you changing the results."

Nick looks at the floor, the ceiling, the walls, "If you need someone to blame, then blame me. It was my fault." He leaves.

Kate has a heart of gold, "I'm going to go check on that poor kid." She follows him out the door.

EJ swears he isn't in on this. Sami doesn't believe him. Lucas gets a call. He tells Sami it was Marlena, "Your dad was stabbed in the line of duty tonight."

Sami goes full throttle into panic. She runs around the apartment screaming she has to get to the hospital. She tells EJ he can't help them anymore. She figures Lucas being the father is why Stefano let her go. There is now no reason for EJ to be in her life, "You are totally irrelevant," she says as she heads into the bedroom.

Danielle apologizes for the cloak and dagger stuff. She says lying to Chelsea tore Jett up inside. She says Jett thinks Chelsea is special. Danielle says she has to go and takes off.

"My God," says Chelsea, "This is seriously unreal. No one will believe this, especially Stephanie." Jett says she can't tell anyone about this.

"Why," she asks, "What has Jeremy done?"

Jeremy talks about flying planes. The landings turn him on, "It's better when the lady you love is sitting next to you."

Bo tells Patch Jeremy isn't what he claims to be.

Jeremy and Stephanie smooch. Kayla has an uncomfortable moment.

Jett, like all good ISA agents, says he doesn't have a clue. He doesn't know what Jeremy is up to. Chelsea says he has to get him out of their lives. She wonders how he got together with Jeremy and the airline. Jett says it is true that he and Jeremy were together in the service. He says he was reading a file on a suspected smuggling operation, saw Jeremy's name all over it and offered to go in with him. He doesn't know who his accomplices are, or what he is doing, "We think Stephanie knows more than she is letting on."

Kayla goes outside. Bo tells her about Roman. Patch says he will stay and explain things to Stephanie while Kayla goes to the hospital. He goes back inside as the lovebirds smooch.

Chelsea says if Stephanie knew what was going on she wouldn't cover for Jeremy. Jett notes that Stephanie is in love with Jeremy and people in love do crazy things.

"I'm not in love," says Chelsea.

"There are exceptions to every rule," says Jett.
He thinks Max is innocent, "Jeremy is keeping him in the dark." Jett wants Chelsea to watch Stephanie. She hesitates.

Patch walks over to the table. He gives Jeremy and Stephanie the bad news about Roman. He says Kayla went to the hospital. Jeremy is, oh so concerned, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Yeah, hotshot," growls Patch, "You can tell us about your record and the time you spent in jail." He smacks the file onto the table.

Lucas says he's taking Sami to see Roman and EJ has no part in that. He tells EJ he is out of their lives for good. Sami is a basket case. She runs out bawling and falls into Lucas' arms. He hugs her and assures her things will be fine. EJ watches.


Chelsea says to Jett, "I'm just your informant, only I don't get paid and the perks aren't really that good. After you nail Jeremy, I don't ever want to see you again."

Patch tells Stephanie, "Throw this jerk out with the rest of the garbage."

Nick says, "Do what I want and your secret stays safe." Kate asks, "And if I don't do what you want?" Nick smiles, "I expose you."

Sami tells Marlena, "I have to protect my children. The best way I can think of is to kill Stefano DiMera." Lucas looks on.

Friday, July 27, 2007


A sharp-eyed reader yesterday accused Prevuze of altering and reprinting a previously printed picture. The picture in question was an altered form of the painting, "Spirit of '76" by Archibald Willard, which features a fife and drum trio and in which the fife player wears a head bandage. In the published picture, the irrevrent Prevuze replaced the head of the fife player with the bandaged head of Nick Fallon.

Unavailable for comment, Prevuze released the following statement: "Prevuze denies any knowledge of reproducing previously published materials. These accusations are completely false, and we look forward to proving our innocence. We are grateful for our loyal fans who contnue to steadfastly support us.

Longtime Prevuze fan Bertha Shlabotnik of Sheboygan, Wisconsin, upon hearing of the controversy, had this to say, "I can assure you all fans will stand behind Prevuze – way behind."

Meanwhile, Willard, who had just returned from the dead to tape an episode of DOOL disparaged the act, "It is reprehensible that anyone would in any way alter or deface such an historic piece of fine art, let alone do it twice."

In a late development, however, an anonymous source produced a second copy of the painting with Patrick Lockhart's bandaged head replacing the fife player. This picture appeared in the Prevuze posting of December 4, 2006. Given this shocking revelation, Prevuze remained unavailable for comment. However, Prevuze' legal counsel, M. Horton of Horton, Horton, Horton, Horton, and Horton, continued to deny all accusations. He did, however, indicate that if any of these accusations were true, Prevuze would immediately sue itself.

Despite this appalling scandal, we hope you all can manage to have a great weekend.

What Is Going On And How Kinky Is It?

Chelsea contemplates her coffee and flashes back to her near-kiss with Jett. Chelsea moves toward him. Jett reels backwards and runs out of the room and has his body fumigated. She then flashes back to their conversation abut the incident. Jett says he would be OK with kissing her, but thinks they should use protection. He just isn't sure of how to protect against cooties.

Then we flash to her getting out of the hot tub and slipping into his arms. We have more flashbacks to moments with Nick. She tells him they are done.

Jett and Danielle come into the pub as Chelsea leaves for the back room.

We pan through a hotel room with clothes strewn all over the floor. Nick wakes up. It's the morning after. We just don't know after what. "Where the hell am I," asks Nick. He gets up and looks around. He figures out he's in Las Vegas. He remembers the money, pulls it out of his belt and says, "I won 50 grand!" Max knocks and falls into the room. His face looks like it has been on the wrong end of a Shawn drive-thru.

Bo and Lexie show up on the seedy side of town to meet Andre. Lexie prays they can get Andre to stop Stefano before Sami gets hurt. She's nervous, but feels like she has to help, "After all, I'm family." Bo reassures her. Bo and the cops go to hide while Lexie twists in the wind as bait for Andre, "OK you SOB, come and get me."

Lucas tells Roman they have to do something now. Roman says he's working on it. A cop hands him a radio and says they raised the pilot of Stefano's plane.

Dr. Rolf preps Sami. Stefano watches and tells him his life is in Rolf's hands. Rolf says he knows what he is doing. The pilot interrupts and says there is a call. Stefano takes the call from Roman on the intercom. Roman tells him they know what he is up to. If he hurts Sami he won't live to see tomorrow.

Jett tells Danielle there are too many people involved. He assures her no one will find out. Danielle can't believe she was dumb enough to let Chelsea overhear her phone conversation and find out about Mark. She wonders what will happen if Chelsea sees them together. Jett assures her she won't, "She's off licking her wounds." He doesn't know if he will still use her. Danielle leaves to take a call. Chelsea walks in and bumps into Jett.

Lexie paces. Andre approaches and says he got Stefano's message. He wonders why Stefano didn't just call. Lexie says this is just the way Stefano wanted to do it. Andre senses she is nervous. He thinks she is setting him up. She denies it. He doesn't believe her.

Stefano says he is on the way to see a specialist and doesn't know what Roman is talking about. Roman says he knows he is there to take Sami's stem cells. Stefano says he was about to sit down and watch DOOL. That way Dr. Rolf won't have to use an anesthetic.

Lucas mouth goes into gear. He chimes in and threatens Stefano. Roman speaks for all of us when he tells Lucas to shut up.

Stefano says he has to go. EJ breaks in, "Father wait, don't go."

Stefano asks, "Elvis, why am I not surprised?"

EJ says, "If you care anything for me at all, do not harm Samantha or those babies."

Stefano yells, "Why should I care for a son who stands with my enemies?"

Nick helps Max clean up. Max tells him two guys beat the crap out of him. He says this has something to do with Jeremy. He tells him about the knockoff clothes scheme. Max thinks the guys who beat him up work for Rawlings. Nick thinks that name is familiar. Max brings up Ilsa. Nick thinks Ilsa must be Russian mafia, and this whole thing has something to do with drugs.

Chelsea apologizes for flipping out in Vegas. She took things out on Jett when she really had a problem with Nick. Chelsea says she and Nick were already over long before the hot tub incident, "The kiss wasn't a big deal but the truth is..."

Jett interrupts, "I can't do this right now."

Bo and the other cops bust out of their hiding places. Bo screams, "Not another step! You're being arrested!"

"What for," asks Andre.

Bo says, "You're going away for good, Andre."

"I'm not Andre, I'm Tony DiMera!"

Tony, the other Tony, that is, walks into the radio conversation with Stefano. EJ insists he would never betray Stefano. He is going to protect his children like Stefano protected him. Stefano says he is not ready to die. EJ asks why Stefano would want to harm his own grandchildren. "If these twins are like their father," says Stefano, "they can't be true DiMeras."

EJ says if Stefano harms the children he won't live to see the end of the week.

Tony/Andre protests as they try to haul him off. He says he didn't know what Stefano was up to since he was on an island for twenty years. He swears he is Tony, "What can I do to convince you?"

Bo says the invitation was sent to Andre. Tony/Andre says Andre forwarded the message to Tony because he knew Tony wouldn't question it since he hadn't seen Lexie for so long. "Nice try, Andre," snarls Bo."

"Don't you see what he is doing," says Tony/Andre, "He's waiting for me to be hauled off to jail, and then he'll be free to attack your family."

EJ says all Stefano cares about is himself. Stefano says he had such hope for EJ after Tony failed him. Now he knows they are both failures, "You turned on your own father because of a woman. A Brady."

Lucas chimes in again, "That's my wife you're talking about!"

"Not for much longer," says Stefano, "Elvis wants her and, as we know, he will do anything to get what he wants." Staredown between EJ and Lucas.

Max says, "We aren't sure it's drugs. And I'm also not sure what else it might be." Nick thinks they should call the cops, "We're not in Salem; they might actually be able to help." Max says he won't back down. Nick asks if Jett is involved. Max wonders why he is so interested in Jett. Nick tells him about his fight with Chelsea. Nick says the last 24 hours are kind of a blur for him. He remembers he was on the beach and then at Sami and Lucas' and then there was a bomb and then he wound up in Vegas. He wants to go find Chelsea and fix this.

Chelsea says she didn't mean to intrude. Jett says he didn't mean to blow her off. He wants to talk about this – later. He says he will call her and set something up.

Danielle walks in, "Chelsea, Hi."

Chelsea turns to Jett and rolls her eyes, "I'm an idiot."

Jett says, "You have a firm grasp of the obvious."

Tony/Andre protests. Tony reminds Bo of things they did together. He talks about a time when he and Bo went to the opera. Tony got popcorn, but Bo wanted cheese doodles. Bo says these things were 20 years ago, "You had time to do your homework, Andre! They drag him off screaming.

"Is it possible," asks Lexie.

Bo isn't sure, "I don't see how anyone else could know about that cheese doodle incident at the opera."

Lexie asks the $64,000 question, "If he's Tony, where is Andre?"

EJ says this isn't about Lucas. He says they have a chance to do something important here.

Stefano has to go. Andre/Tony takes the radio. He wants him to know he is assisting the police. Roman takes the radio. Stefano suggests they get together after the trip, "Because something tells me I'm going to feel like a new man." He hangs up and sighs, "Where did I go wrong?"

Lexie wants to go to the station and find out if that was really Andre. Bo convinces her not to go, "It's always so embarrassing when the public is there to see the Salem cops screw up." Bo says he is going to call Roman, "If we didn't get Andre, Roman has to know he is still out there."

Lucas has to go make some calls and let Marlena and others know what is going on. EJ offers to give him a ride. Roman says to tell Marlena he isn't giving up. Lucas thanks Andre/Tony for all his help as they leave.

Roman gets a call from Bo. Tony/Andre tells Roman Andre is too devoted to Stefano. As Roman takes the call, Tony/Andre pulls out a knife.

Stefano tells Rolf he is ready for the operation. Rolf assures him the stem cells will save his life. Suddenly, Bart rushes in, "Don't do it! Don't do it!" Bart says he was going over the medical record, "Elvis is not the father of the babies!"

Rolf looks at the lab work, "Zis shows zere iss a different fazer. Zee ztem zells vill not zave you."

Stefano goes into a rage, "How did this happen?" He insists the test must not be wrong. Rolf says there is no mistake. Stefano sits down.

Bart points to Sami, "What do we do about her?"

Chelsea starts to leave but Jett and Danielle stop her. Danielle says she and Jett are just friends.

Chelsea asks, "Tell me what is going on and how kinky is it?"

Bo tells Roman the guy they arrested insisted he was Tony, "He knew things only Tony would know."

Roman tells him to hang on. He turns around, "Andre?" Andre rams his knife into Roman's gut. Roman wretches like he just had one of Sami's home-cooked meals, jerks forward and hits the deck.

Bo yells, "Roman? Roman?"

Yes, fans, once again the Salem cops plan worked to perfection and they nailed the wrong guy.

Max says he is sure Nick and Chelsea will work things out. Nick wishes he could do this day over again. Max wishes all chicks would have a twin, "Then you could mess up on the first one and have a do-over."

This prompts the one-watt light bulb in Nick's head to turn on. He remembers Sami's twins and the test results. He tells Max about faking the test. He says he has to get to Salem and tell the truth.

Danielle says she is happily married and Jett and her husband are friends. Chelsea says she couldn't care less, and walks out. Danielle says Jett has to find Chelsea and tell her the truth.

The cops haul the real Tony into the station in cuffs. As one of the guys books him he says, "You have a twin."

"So I have been told," says Tony.

The cops go in to get Roman and tell him Andre is here. They find him lying on the floor. Officer Dumbrowski screams, "He's been stabbed. Somebody call the cops! " They rush out of the room leaving Roman to bleed to death. Dumbrowski radios, "We have a man down!"

Tony goes into Roman's office and kneels beside him, "Roman, can you hear me?"

Roman groans, "Damn you Andre."

"It's Tony," says Tony, "Hang in there. Help is on the way."

Roman can barely speak, "You gotta stop Andre."

Bo is out at SNAFU Central talking on the phone. One of the cops rushes up and tells him Roman has been stabbed.

Lucas talks to Marlena on the phone, "Stefano wouldn't even admit Sami was on the plane. EJ joins him and assures him things will be OK.

Right after hanging up, Lucas gets another call.

Sami says, "Lucas?"

"Where the hell are you," asks Lucas.

"In a motel or something," says Sami, "My head hurts and I feel funny. Pease come and get me."

"Just tell me where you are," says Lucas.

Andre watches through the window. FF.


Jett says to Chelsea, "The whole thing was a setup and Danielle was in on it. Is that enough truth for you?"

Patch, Kayla, Stephanie and Jeremy sit at a table in the pub. Jeremy says, "Stephanie reminds me of the man I want to be. It's only one of the reasons I love her so much."

Bo tells Patch, "I got that jacket you wanted on Jeremy. It ain't pretty."

Lucas tells EJ, "The bottom line is... you're out of our lives." As EJ backs out and closes the door, Sami and Lucas embrace. Sami cries.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Mr. Colt

Nick's brain damage has totally kicked in and he is hot to marry Chelsea. He pops the question in a way that would sweep any girl off her feet, "Whad'ya say? Tie the old knot?"


"Oh," says Nick, "I forgot, you're a traditionalist." He takes a knee, "Chelsea Brady, will you marry me?" Chelsea accuses him of being drunk. He insists he's drunk on life. He wants her to take a gamble for once.

A gamble," she says, "would be dying my hair orange, or eating snails. Not getting married on a whim." She storms off.

"Awww, shoot," says Nick.

Stephanie gets in Jeremy's face, "Who is she, the other girl?" Jeremy plays dumb. It isn't a stretch. Stephanie says Max told her about the girl at Bo and Hope's house, "Good luck trying to talk your way out of this!"

Ilsa comes to Max' room. When he opens the door and she sees it's him, she says, "I don't have time for this."

Max looks at his watch, "Yes you do – 30 minutes. I paid a nice chunk of change for you."

Lexie creeps into Bo's office in her full-body hoodie. Bo assures her Abe won't be there, but Abe wants to see her. Lexie ain't ready. Bo assures her Abe will forgive her and then kick his butt for not letting him in on this. John knocks and comes in. He asks a favor of Lexie. He wants her to be the bait to help hook Andre.

Lucas fills Marlena in on Sami's disappearance. EJ thinks this is just another one of his family's scare tactics. He apologizes for it to Marlena, "I'm sorry."

Marlena laces into him, "As sorry as when you raped my daughter or shot my husband?"

EJ says, "I care very deeply about Samantha."

Marlena says, "Get a hold of that so-called father of yours. Tell him to find Sami and get her back here."

Roman comes in. He's checked all the bus depots, train stations, airports (Salem has at least five) and it looks like they've dropped off the face of the earth.

Stefano and Bart are on a plane. Bart holds his head in a rag and says, "She has a right hook like Floyd Merewether. Unfortunately, I have a glass jaw like Floyd Merewether." Rolf announces Sami is about ready to make her charitable donation.

Max threatens to get Ilsa's boss on the phone. She relents and comes in. She starts to undress, "You have protection?" That's not what Max wants. He just wants to talk. "I do not get paid to talk," says Ilsa. Max wants to know what's up with Jeremy. He also wants her to know he is on her side.

Nick comes back to Chelsea and says he made a mistake. He can't pop the question without a ring. He goes over to the bar and makes a ring out of a maraschino cherry stem. He gives it to her and tells her it's temporary. When they get back she can pick out one she wants. Money is no object. Chelsea asks if he honestly thinks she would say yes.

"I want to spend all the Days Of Our Lives together," says Nick.

"Just go away."

Jeremy wants to know where Stephanie's accusations are coming from. He Stephanie says she heard it from Chelsea who heard it from Max. "So you believe Max and Chelsea over me," snorts Jeremy, "Thanks a lot!"

At the moment, Stephanie says she does believe Chelsea and Max over Jeremy, "You are not turning this around on me. I defended you to my parents. Why did you do this?" Jeremy wants to tell her what is really going on.

Bo thinks it's too dangerous to use Lexie to bait Andre. "Do you have another way," asks John, "I'm all ears."

"No, you just got your hair cut too short," says Bo.

Lexie wants to do it. She says when she was locked away she had a lot of time to think of how much she has hurt people. This is her chance to redeem herself. Bo stands his ground like the French army and immediately agrees. "What do you want me to do," asks Lexie. John smiles. His ears pop out even farther.

Lucas says, "Well, props to the Salem PD. Are you guys still batting zero?" Roman tells him the Salem PD is doing everything it can to find them. That's when Lucas gets really nervous.

Tony arrives, "I have news of Samantha."

Stefano sits beside Sami, "Youth really is wasted on the young. What I would not give to go back to those days that were so much simpler. Do you suppose that He will forgive me for doing this?"

"Who," asks Rolf.

Stefano looks to the heavens, "Him. I wonder if I am sacrificing a place by his side simply for a few more years on this earth." One thing you can say about Stefano... he certainly doesn't have any self-esteem issues.

Ilsa says she met Jeremy in a bar. Max doesn't buy it. Ilsa wonders why Max is doing this to her. Max continues the questions. If she doesn’t cooperate he threatens to call immigration.

Jeremy concocts a story, "I didn't sleep with her. She is a fired of a guy I'm in business with. Kye Rawlings. I think you have heard me talk about him. He wanted me to make sure she got a ticket to Vegas. That's all. I didn't sleep with her. She's not my type. I like the tall ones, with long brown hair, no brain..."

Jett interrupts. He tells them Nick won 50 G's, but his luck ran out when he proposed to Chelsea. They watch as Nick takes another crack at convincing Chelsea to marry him.

Nick points out lots of important people get married on a whim. "Brittany Spears for one." Well, there is the gold-standard of intelligence. Chelsea sarcastically suggests forgetting the ceremony and just going to a drive-through, "The answer is no."

Nick asks, "No – you don't want to get married at all, or is this about some problem you have with me?"

Chelsea says, "Yes." She contemplates the maraschino cherry stem ring.

"You should be flattered I asked," says Nick.

"I can't believe you just said that," she thinks he needs to have his head examined – for real. He decides he's getting married tonight with or with out her. She storms out telling him to let her know where to send the gift.

"I think that was a no," says Jett as he heads toward Chelsea. Stephanie turns to Jeremy and says if she finds out he's lying about that girl it's over between them. Jeremy says he has some business to take care of and leaves.

Ilsa takes the phone from Max and tells him she is from Slovakia. She says she met Jeremy in Salem. She was told she could get a job.

John has a secret phone with the same number as Stefano's. Bo wonders how in the world he got hold of that. John invokes his superspy don't ask, don't tell policy. He says he's going to text Andre on it, and Andre will think the message is coming from Stefano. Lexie will meet Andre and before he can do anything to Lexie, Bo will be all over him.

Tony says Stefano's plane just took off from a private airfield in Illinois. He has scheduled a flight over international waters, and will be airborne until he recovers. EJ asks about fuel. Tony says he will have the plane refueled in flight.

Lucas snorts, "You've gotta be kidding me."

Tony says, "I wish I were, Lucas. You know, I don't think any of us are going to see Samantha any time soon."

Nick sits at the bar. Jeremy joins him. He says he heard Nick hit the jackpot and asks why he looks so bummed. Nick tells him about his fight with Chelsea, "Who cares? I've got a pocket full of cash and the night is young."

Jeremy advises him to invest the cash, "How would you like to double your money in just a couple of weeks?"

Jett meets up with Chelsea, "I take it you said 'no.'" Chelsea says she's peeved because Nick expected her to say yes and was persistent.

"He knows what he wants," says Jett.

"What about what I want," asks Chelsea, "College... A career... To see the world... The last thing I need is to be tied down with a husband. She leaves.

John sends the text message, "I tossed in a few two-dollar Euro words to make it sound like it came from Stefano."

"Now we wait," says Lexie.

Bo leaves to round up some backup, "If this gets serious, we'll need some real cops there."

John knows Lexie and Sami have had their differences. Lexie says once this is over, it would be nice to put the past behind them. John's secret phone rings. He reads the message, "Andre bought it. We are on."

EJ wants to take action. He wants to call all the air controllers in the world until they find the plane. Lucas thinks they should figure out a way to force the plane to land. Roman heads for the station. EJ and Lucas follow. Roman assures Marlena they will bring Sami home. He tells Tony to keep an eye on her. Marlena picks up a picture of Sami and hugs it.

Stefano says he would have preferred to wait until his grandchildren were born. He looks down at the unconscious Sami, "Oh, Samantha, I wish it could be different but we must make this sacrifice."

Chelsea says people told her it would never work out between her and Nick. Jett asks if she leads her life by what other people say. She says no, but doesn't think she and Nick are a good match anymore. She needs someone who isn't so insecure. Jett understands. He thinks she shouldn't write Nick off so soon, though. Chelsea says she has cut him too many brakes and it's over. Jett thinks she is just trying to convince herself.

Jeremy says one of his investors just backed out, so he is looking for a new partner. He looks at Nick's outfit and says, "You obviously appreciate a fine wardrobe, am I right?"

Nick is unenthusiastic, "I don't know."

Jeremy tries to pump him up, "Where is the guy who threw down all those Benjamins tonight?" Nick says he has to go. He walks away.

Nick sees Stephanie swilling her beer, "Is it that kind of night?"

"Yeah, You too?"

"Yeah, except for winning the 50 grand." Stephanie says she would take that kind of night anytime and asks what Jeremy was talking bout. Nick says Jeremy was trying to flatter him into investing in Put The Touch On This Guy Airlines, "But I wouldn't buy a used car from him." Stephanie watches as Jeremy leaves. She follows.

Nick sighs, "Alone again."

Not for long. A woman walks up and asks, "Is this seat taken?"

Nick perks up, "Help yourself!"

"So," she says, "You want to buy me a drink or what?"

Max swears Ilsa won't regret helping him. He asks bout Kye Rawlings. Ilsa doesn't have time to answer before Jeremy walks in.

Lucas and EJ make calls. Nothing is working out. EJ assures Lucas they will find Sami. "Easy for you to say," growls Lucas, "but your wife isn't in the hands of a madman."

"Those are my children," says EJ.

"Thanks for reminding me."

EJ says now that he's faced with losing them it puts everything into focus. He's sorry for what he put Lucas through. He knows Lucas will be a good father to the twins.

Lucas says he will, "I'm praying for them even though Sami is my number one concern."

Roman comes in and announces they have a location.

Jeremy asks if Ilsa is OK. Max swears he wouldn't hurt her. Jeremy asks what Max said to upset her. Max ushers Ilsa out so he and Jeremy can talk. He comes back and tells Jeremy, "You're starting to get on my nerves."

"The feeling is mutual."

Nick orders a vodka-rocks for the new love of his life. Her name is China Lee. She got the name because she was conceived in China.

Nick says, "I guess it's a good thing you weren't conceived in Uzbekistan."

Nick drags China over to Chelsea, "I'd like you to meet the future Mrs. Nick Fallon!"

Tony assures Marlena they will get through this. He says he is living proof Stefano doesn't always prevail, "If I can overcome Stefano, Sami can, too."

John arrives. He assures Marlena they will find Sami. Tony checks his phone and suddenly announces he has to go. He runs out the door. Marlena asks, "I wonder what that's about?"

"Kinda makes you think," says John, "I hate it when that happens. In the meantime how would you like to view Andre behind steel bars?"

Bo has returned from his mission to get backup and tells Lexie it's time to hit the road. He tells her it's not too late to back out. She says, "I want to do this, Bo." Bo is proud of her and says Abe will be too. They head out. Lexie hoods-up.

Max wants to know how many more Ilsas are out there. Stephanie interrupts the argument. Max says, "It's not over. I won't let up until I get every piece of the puzzle." He leaves.

Stephanie asks, "What story? What's not over?"

"Max is just being a total drama queen," says Jeremy.

Chelsea thinks Nick is really out of his mind. Nick says, "Hey! You're offending Asia Lee here."

"That's 'China,'" she corrects.

Chelsea is happy for him but wants to know what he is trying to prove. "Nothing," says Nick, "You lost your chance, babe." He and China go off to get married. Outside, Nick thanks China for playing along with the marriage act. He offers to buy her a drink.

A couple of thugs intercept Max as he walks through the casino, "Are you Max Brady?"

"Maybe... maybe not," says Max, "Who wants to know?"

One of the hoods sticks a gun in his ribs, "Mr. Colt. I think you'd better come with us, pretty boy." They haul Max off as Kye follows.

PrevuzeJohn says if the plan works out they will have Andre in custody tonight. That turns Marlena on. She dives in. John wants more. They spiral out of control. "Let's save it for the car," says John, "I'll race you. Let's go!" John slaps her butt as they race for the car.

Roman tells EJ and Lucas Stefano's plane is cruising the airspace between Grand Cayman and Bermuda, "Next, we make radio contact with the plane and go from there."

Dr. Rolf says, "All ve neet now iz to make zleepy time vor Stefano and all zyztems are go." Stefano gets on his gurney and looks at Sami.

The suspension system in John's car fails.


Max' face looks like it has been worked over with a meat cleaver, "Whatever it is, I intend to find out what is going on and see that Jeremy gets what's coming to him."

Danielle says, "Chelsea, Hi." Chelsea turns to Jett, "I'm an idiot."

EJ says into a walkie-talkie, "If you care anything for me at all, do not harm Samantha or those babies." Stefano yells, "Why should I care for a son who stands with my enemies?"

Roman says, "Andre?" Andre rams him in the gut. Roman wretches and jerks forward.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Lucky Lucifer And Nick The Geek

Stephanie chases Jeremy down as he chases Ilsa. She makes him agree to have dinner with her parents, and then he makes his escape. He tells her to have the new silk panties waiting for later.

Nick loses a hand and decides to skip the next one. Chelsea encourages him to quit while he's ahead or, sarcastically suggests he just up the limit on his credit card and go for broke. Nick insists his luck is going to change.

Chelsea tells him no one ever wins. Nick sees Pete across the table, who just keeps on winning. Pete wins another hand, turns to his bimbos and says, "Hey... winning isn't everything, you know... What am I talking about? Of course it is. WINNING IS EVERYTHING!" The babes paw Pete as he dishes out some of his winnings.

Kayla walks in as Patch tends bar. He's running a special for beautiful blondes, "Everything is on the house." Kayla has come from Hope's house, where she got to spend some time with Ciara.

Patch says, "She's beautiful when she isn't spitting up on you."

Kayla asks, "What do you think about us with a little..."

Patch interrupts, "Teddy bear?"

Kayla smiles, "A baby."

Patch says, "I'd a whole lot rather have a teddy bear."

Belle is stunned at Shawn's marriage proposal. Shawn stammers around waiting for an answer. Belle thought they were going to wait till they got settled. Smooches. Shawn decides to take that as a yes. Belle stares that blank stare of hers.

Jeremy asks Ilsa what she was doing in the casino, "You have to stay out of sight."

Ilsa says, "It won't happen again."

Jeremy says, "Just do your job."

Max walks up, "What job is that, Jeremy? 'Cause I'd sure like to know."

Belle says she has dreamed of this moment often. BUT... Shawn can live with any doubts she might have as long as he knows she's going to be Mrs. Brady someday soon.

Patch and Kayla discuss having a second chance. Kayla wants a baby. Patch reminds her of little things like work and responsibility. He ends the discussion. Kayla can't accept that. Patch makes a face. He says he would give her the world. Kayla says she doesn't want the world – she just wants a baby. Patch says he has been trying with Stephanie, but one of the things he isn't good at is being a dad.

Pete wins again. Chelsea tells Nick tomorrow Pete will be losing. It doesn't look that way to Nick, "You're a buzz kill." Chelsea leaves, and Pete wins again.

Pete gives part of his winnings to the play-for-pay girls, "Put this someplace where I can find it later." He turns to the dealer and says, "I'd like to hang around but my two friends are not just naughty they are downright dirty. I have to go upstairs and give them a bath."

Pete walks over to Nick, I couldn't help but notice you're little hottie split."

"Hottie," asks Nick, "I didn't realize blind people could be so good at cards." Pete assures him she'll come back if he starts winning.

"Some people call me Lucky Lucifer," says Pete.

"And some people call me Nick the Geek."

Pete puts his arm around Nick, "If a geek wants to win he's got to start growing some hair."

Stephanie and Chelsea discuss their men. Well, actually, they discuss Jeremy and Nick. Chelsea has issues with Jeremy. "What is your problem," asks Stephanie, "Are you disappointed all you've ever had is a geek like Nick?" A referee steps in and penalizes Stephanie for a low blow.

Jeremy and Max argue about Ilsa. Max thinks it's quite a coincidence she is staying at the same hotel as Jeremy. Jeremy wants to end the discussion. Max tells him this isn't over.

Nick is insulted by Pete's remark. He asks him to step outside. Pete tells him, "All I meant was, you're not playing. There are forces in the universe that you can't buck, but you can influence. You have to play with more money to influence them. If you're gonna gamble, GAMBLE." He lets Nick in on a secret. He has a good luck charm – his pappy's glass eye.

Shawn puts on the sales pitch, "It will be great for Claire."

Back at Bo and Hope's house, Claire surfs the Internet... www.newparents.com.

Shawn insists, "It's not about Phillip, but I want him out of our lives." Translation: It's about Phillip. Belle just wants to be sure. Shawn says, "I thought it was about me. I thought I had a lot of growing up to do. I guess I'm not the only one." He hesitates for a minute, "Scratch that. I didn't mean it to sound like that."

Belle says, "It's not that. God knows, we both have more growing up to do than Claire. You just surprised me."

"Oh," says Shawn, "Next time I'll give you advanced notice. I'll call you up and you can circle it with a big red marker on your calendar."

The girl is as sharp as a tack under a steamroller, "You're making fun of me! You know, I haven't officially said no yet." He picks her up, tosses her around and the whole thing devolves into giggle and tickle. Things get serious.

Max wants to know why Jeremy is evading him. Jeremy turns to Ilsa and asks her to tell him why she is there. She says she comes to Vegas a lot and she knows people there. Max says he doesn't like the way Jeremy makes his money. Jeremy asks, "Why do you take it, then?"

Chelsea says Jeremy isn't even her type. Stephanie senses there is something more, "If you have something to say, say it."

"OK," says Chelsea, "The guy is cheating on you."

Nick thinks the glass eye is gross. Pete tells him the story of his pappy. His luck was bad. He got caught with a marked deck. That's when they beat him and he lost his eye. He found the glass eye in a pawnshop in St. Louis, popped it in and from that moment, started winning big, "He said the eye saw things. He gave it to me on his deathbed. The eye has never let me down. Try it, Nick. Let's see if you can grow some hair."

Kayla tells Patch to stop blaming himself for not raising Stephanie. She swears things will get better with her.

"Couldn't get a whole lot worse," says Patch. He tells her a kid shouldn't be a second chance to make things right. He's happy and he doesn't need a baby to make his life better.

Belle wants a rematch. Shawn says he pinned her fair and square, "Tell me, are you dumping me?"

"Why would you say something like that," asks Belle, "I love you. I don't want to dump you. I want us to be open about things. I know you blew off that job interview, and you didn't get on that plane."

Kayla says she doesn’t need a baby to make her happy. She thinks it would make their lives richer. Patch has issues. He wouldn't know how to raise a baby. Kayla says a child of theirs would love him as much as she does. He doesn’t want to end up raising a kid like Jeremy.

Max and Jeremy argue. Max tells him to take his money and shove it. Jeremy says Max can't handle Vegas and the partnership is over. Isn't this the part where Max is supposed to remind Jeremy he's doing all this with money he borrowed from Max?

Nick wins again. He thanks Pete. His winnings are up to $22,400, and he wants to bet the rest of the pile.

Stephanie says, "Jeremy would never cheat on me."

"You're right," says Chelsea with a whole lot of sarcasm, "Max saw him at my parents house with a girl."

"Max hates him," says Stephanie, "He's lying. You and Max are rotten friends. I hate you both."

Chelsea says she's trying to be a true friend. Max thought she should tell her sooner but she couldn't because she knew how upset she would be. Stephanie insists it can't be true, "If it is, and it's not, what would you do?"

Chelsea says, "After I thought of a million ways to get back, I'd get in his face and make sure he knew he'd never mess with me again. But you won't do that because Jeremy would never cheat on you." She leaves.

Nick wants to do something really nice for Chelsea. Pete says the eye is only good for one more hand. Nick bets it all. The dealer tells him he can't – the table has a $1,000 limit. Pete steps in and tells her to bend the rules. She lets Nick bet the whole pile and deals. Nick gets a sixteen, "That's not good. If I get more than a five, I go bust."

Pete points the eye at the deck of cards, "You're OK. The next card is a four."

"How do you know," asks Nick.

"I've been counting cards," says Pete, "Keep it quiet or they'll throw me out of here."

Max tells Jeremy walking out on the deal is fine with him. Jeremy says there is outstanding business. Max says, "I'll keep my mouth shut unless you are running more than knockoffs. If that's the case I'll drop a dime on you."

Kayla shows Patch Ciara's pictures. Patch likes the pictures; it's kids he can't stand. Seeing the picture doesn't make him want one.

Kayla whines, "There are so many needy kids who need a home."

"Not the Johnson home," growls Patch.

Kayla thinks it's a shame for a needy child to miss out on a father like Steve. He tells her it's not for him, "The kind of things you do with kids are gone for me. That boat has sailed."

Shawn rages that Phillip told Belle about the job interview. He says everything about that job would have been about Phillip. He thinks he can build a future for them at the garage. If he had taken the job in Cleveland, he would have been missing out on everything. Belle agrees but wants to know what he did on the fourth. Shawn flashes back to changing the tickets. He tells her he didn't go anywhere, "I just drove around. So many living rooms, so little time."

"Hit me and make it hurt," says Nick. The dealer turns over a four. Nick has a 20; the dealer has 19. Nick yells, "I WON FIFTY GRAND! Thank you, Pete! This is all because of your pappy's eyeball." Nick goes to cash in.

Chelsea comes back and asks if Stephanie still hates her. Jeremy walks up before she can answer. Chelsea asks where Nick is. Stephanie says she saw him counting some cash, "Maybe you should put some tabs on him."

Chelsea looks at Jeremy, "Maybe you should put some on him." Chelsea leaves.

Jeremy wants to know why Chelsea is so hung up on the loser. Stephanie defends Nick. Jeremy wonders what's with her. He suggests one of his famous backrubs. Stephanie isn't in the mood.

Nick counts his money. Chelsea finds him and he tells her he won, "We are rich, and we are in Vegas. Let's get married."

Pete turns to the dealer, "Anything the skinny kid won, put it on my tab."

"Why did you do that for a stranger," asks the dealer.

"I did it for love," says Pete, "I'm a romantic I guess."

On his way out, Pete comes across a janitor with an eye Patch sweeping up. He holds up the glass eye, "Hey, pal, did you lose this? I found it under a table. You should keep a better eye on your eye. It's a lucky eye."

Max knocks on a door. Creepo answers. Max asks how to find Ilsa. Creepo is reluctant to say anything until Max roughs him up. "Are you a pimp," asks Creepo, "She's a hooker."

"I want to know how to find her NOW," says Max.

Patch says Kayla had years to adopt a kid. Kayla says she didn't because she wanted a full time dad. Patch admits she's wearing him down and he's thinking about it. They agree to talk it through. Patch wants to leave time for other things besides a kid in their life. He comes to her side of the booth. Smooch.

Shawn is sorry Belle had to find out from Phillip. He thinks he messed things up. Belle thinks they both did. "So what do we do now," asks Shawn.

Belle gets on her knees, "We still have some unfinished business. Will you marry me?"

Shawn asks, "You're proposing to me?"

Belle asks, "Are you gonna marry me or not?" Shawn says yes. Hugs. Belle goes back to that stare. FF.


Chelsea says, "The answer is no." Nick asks, "No – you don't want to get married at all, or is this about some problem you have with me?"

EJ says, "I care very deeply about Samantha." Marlena says, "Get a hold of that so-called father of yours. Tell him to find Sami and get her back here."

Lucas snorts, "You've gotta be kidding me." Tony says, "I wish I were, Lucas. You know, I don't think any of us are going to see Samantha any time soon." Marlena and Roman stand by.

Stefano tells Rolf, "I wish it could be different but we must make this sacrifice." Sami lies unconscious.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

I.P. Daily

Billie and Phillip are together in the pub. Phillip plays her the tape of the baby from hell crying and calling for Daddy. Phillip says that is the latest call. He got it today.

Billie asks if she can have the tape, and if there have been any threats. Phillip tells her she can have it and says there really haven't been any threats, just the same stuff every time. "Do you have any idea who is making the calls," asks Billie.

"I don't have a clue," says Phillip.

"I know," says Billie, "But what I need to know is if you have any idea who is making the calls."

Billie asks him to make a list of people who have grudges against him. Phillip says Titan is worldwide and he might have quite a few enemies. Billie thinks this is personal, not business. Belle walks in and winky-waves at Phillip as she walks by.

Shawn meets Bo at the hospital. Bo tells him no Brady is safe while Andre is out. Shawn says he is back working at the garage, and then hesitates.

Bo asks, "Something on your mind?"

Shawn says, "Same thing as usual... dust. But, I'm thinking of asking Belle to marry me."

Jeremy surveys the situation around the hot tub, "Return your seat backs to their normal positions." Jett asks what Nick is doing there. Chelsea says she would like to know the answer to that one, too. Nick reminds her they had a date. Chelsea reminds him they had a fight. Nick says he remembers nothing. He tells Chelsea there was a bomb and asks, "What are you two doing together?"

EJ asks, "Is it me, or is my briefcase beeping?" Lucas goes over the top with panic. He shoves Sami, "Sami! It's a bomb! Get out of the way."

Sami runs away from him, "Lucas, NO!" EJ gives the briefcase a quizzical look.

Bo is ecstatic. Shawn can't think of any reason why Belle would say yes. "You're not that ugly," says Bo. Shawn wishes he were pulling in more money. "Ah," says Bo, "I see the problem – Phillip."

Phillip thinks maybe he may just be the victim of crank calls. Billie imitates being on the phone, "May I speak to I.P. Daily? Do you have Prince Albert in a can? THOSE are crank calls. This isn't." Billie says she will get to work on it.

Phillip says, "You didn't ask if I had a kid out there I don't know about. It was the first thing Bo asked."

"You're my brother. I have more faith in you than Bo does. You would have told me," says Billie. Hugs. Billie leaves. Belle immediately scoots in. She tells him she is there because Caroline is putting food together for her beach date with Shawn, "God forbid I should have to cook." Phillip hands her a fancy department store sack.

Lucas tries to stop EJ from opening his briefcase. The idiot opens it anyway and smoke billows out. "Get out," screams EJ.

Chelsea drags Nick out and tells him to go home. She says she slipped getting out of the hot tub and that's why she and Jett were all tangled up in each other's arms. She gets mad at him for following her there and leaves. Jett walks in. Nick asks if he is a betting man. "Sometimes," says Jett.

"Well," says the strung-out Nick, "The odds are overwhelmingly against you."

Jerkemy sits in the Jacuzzi and pours champagne. Stephanie comes out and strips down to her string bikini. More string than bikini. "It just got way hotter in here," says Jerko as he smooches her, "I spoil you, girl!"

Stephanie flashes back to her hot tub conversation with Chelsea, "Yeah – when you're feeling guilty."

Flash to hot Vegas action in the casino. Max tells Bobbi the dealer he is busted. Bobbi tells him to come back when his luck changes. He turns and leaves. As he walks away, he passes Ilsa and Creepo. Max hears Ilsa say something and says to himself, "I know that voice." He flashes back to his conversation with her at Bo and Hope's house, "What is she doing in Vegas?"

Belle opens the sack and pulls out clothes. She can't believe how great they are. Phillip hauls out another sack and says he has stuff for Claire, too, "A woman should have clothes that set off her beauty." Belle thinks this is sooooo sweet, but can't accept.

Bo tells Shawn to forget about Phillip. "I can do that," says Shawn, "It's pretty easy for me to forget things." He tells Bo he has a lot of debt, though.

"Don't worry," says Bo, "Organized crime is always looking for couriers. I never understood why you agreed to live with Phillip, though." Shawn runs through the whole Claire-is-missing scenario. "Claire is back and you are still living there," says Bo. Shawn wishes he had more to offer. Bo encourages him to take his time, get a little money together and pop the question. Roman interrupts. Shawn leaves.

Phillip asks Belle to keep the clothes. Belle says she can't. Living with Phillip makes Shawn feel like he can't pull his own weight.

Shawn walks in and surveys the scene. He sits down with Billie. "I have a question for you," says Shawn, "What would you say if a guy proposed to you with a ring like this in his hand?" He opens the box and shows it to her. Billie puts on a pair of sunglasses, drops her jaw and immediately accepts Shawn's proposal.

Nick dances around Jett swinging his arms like a spastic boxer, "Come on... How many rounds before you kiss the canvas?" Jett offers to knock him to kingdom come. Nick tells Jett he was just kidding. Jett swears he and Chelsea are just friends. Nick wants to know what is going on. Chelsea comes in and asks Jett to take her to the bar.

"Are we done," asks Nick.

"So done," says Chelsea as she and Jett walk out.

Jeremy says guilt has nothing to do with their relationship and swears he has nothing to be guilty about. She tells him to forget it. He asks if Max said something to her. "Max didn't say squat about you," insists Stephanie. She backs off and Jeremy apologizes for laying into her. He says there are people who might want to spread lies about him.

Creepo tells Ilsa, "I have to go see a man about a horse. Don't go anywhere, candy pants."

Max steps up and re-introduces himself to Ilsa. Ilsa is distant. She says she can't talk. Max says, "I just want to know that you're OK."

Ilsa says, "I cannot talk to you."

Max says, "I'm one of the good guys. I swear, Ilsa, just talk..."

Creepo interrupts, "Hey! The little lady is with me, so just back off, Jack!"

"WOW," says Billie. She wonders if Shawn got the ring out of a gumball machine. Shawn says Max gave him an advance on his salary. Billie says she would say yes to the ring and then to the guy, "This is for Belle right?"

"No," says Shawn, "I'm coming out of the closet."

Phillip offers to send the stuff back. He insists he's rooting for Shawn and Belle. Shawn steps up. He wonders what's with all the stuff in the sacks. Belle sweats.

EJ and Lucas come back to consciousness. "It's ether," says EJ, "Sulfur chloride."
Lucas wonders where Sami is. He rushes around the apartment like a crazed pinball, "She's gone!"

Chelsea says she can't believe Nick. Jett says he gave Chelsea an out on her date with Nick and she chose not to take it. Flashback to Jett telling her about the flight that night. Chelsea thinks it's embarrassing he followed her to Vegas. She wants to go party. They leave.

Nick paces. He opens a suitcase and picks out some clothes.

Stephanie says she doesn't like people talking trash about Jeremy. He tells her he's involved in a big business deal, "We're starting to make some really big money, and that's when people start spreading lies. If you hear anything like that, it's just envy talking." Stephanie wants to know more about what's going on and why people would lie about him. Jeremy rants, "If you want to play dumb, play dumb but it's boring me." He storms out.

Cool Nick walks out into the hall and struts.

Max tells Creepo he's just saying hi to Ilsa, since he already knows her. "You know," he says, "You might want to try those little blue pills. They might help you out this evening." Creepo takes a swing, misses and falls into a heap on the floor. Max looks down at the crumpled pile.

Ilsa walks up to him. SLAP! "Stay the hell out of my business." A guard hauls Creepo off.

Belle squeals and says she loves the stuff. Shawn asks where she got the money. "My mom took me shopping," she lies, "It's a bit much. Maybe I should return it."

"No," says Shawn, "You deserve nice things. I'll pay Marlena back."

"You can't," gasps Belle, "She said it is a gift."

Shawn leaves. Belle worries about lying to Shawn. Phillip offers encouragement. Belle melts, "You are a girl's dream come true."

Phillip says, "What a coincidence. You're every guy's nightmare."

Bo and Roman have shown up at Lucas' apartment. "They got to her," says Lucas, "We were out cold. There was nothing we could do." Roman thinks it was Andre that did it. Bo tells them Andre is no longer in traction. "They gave him a muscle blocker," says Roman, "When it wore off, Andre was able to escape."

"Andre has Sami," says EJ, "We need to go to Stefano.

Bo says, "By sheer coincidence, Stefano has disappeared too."

Lucas rages and says Stefano will use the stem cells to save his own miserable life. Roman grabs him and tells him to cool it. EJ sides with Lucas, "He's right. My father will sacrifice anyone to save himself."

Ilsa walks away. Max wanders. Chelsea and Jett find him. She tells him about Nick showing up. Max is distant. He asks if Jett knows Ilsa, "She is the one Jeremy picked up that night at the bar and took to Bo and Hope's house. I wonder what she is doing in Vegas."

"Wanting more," asks Chelsea.

Max says he is picking up weird vibes. As he leaves to get drinks, Jett says if he sees Ilsa again to let him know.

Chelsea says she hasn't told Stephanie about Jerkemy's peccadilloes. Jeremy walks up and offers to buy drinks. Chelsea passes. Alone with Max, Jeremy gives him another wad-o-cash.

Lucas rants, "I'm taking the DiMeras down if I have to do it with my bare hands." Mercifully, he doesn't threaten to talk them to death, though. Bo tells Lucas to slow down. Lucas don' wanna. Roman and Bo tell Lucas to stay put while they look for Sami. Lucas understandably doesn't have much faith in the Salem PD. He wonders what took them so long to get there after the ether bomb went off.

"We got a diversionary call from Andre and followed that on a wild goose chase," says Roman. Lucas wonders why he should trust the Salem PD to find Sami if they get distracted that easily. "OK," says Roman, "It wasn't our finest moment."

"When exactly was your finest moment," asks Lucas.

Roman is silent.
He says if Sami gets to a phone she will call the apartment, so Lucas should stay there. He and Bo leave for another wild goose adventure.

EJ says, "Come on, Lucas, it's up to us to find Samantha."

Phillip asks about the flight to Cleveland Shawn didn't take. Belle shrugs it off and says it's a tiny fib – like the one she just told. Shawn comes back with the food for the beach. Belle thanks Phillip as she walks out. Phillip gives her a peck on the cheek, "It was my pleasure."

Max walks off as Jeremy counts his money. Stephanie comes up, kisses him and tells him she doesn't want to fight any more. Jeremy apologizes for walking off. He tells her the cash is the payoff from the side action he has going. He gives her some, "Buy some silk panties." She wishes her dad could see them like this. They talk about the dinner Patch set up and Jeremy tells her to count him in.

"What's a good time," asks Stephanie.

Ilsa walks by. Jeremy sees her and says he can't deal with that right now. He chases Ilsa. Max follows.

Chelsea watches and tells Jett Jeremy just totally ditched Stephanie. She wants to swoop in and tell her what's going on. Jett thinks this probably isn't a good time, "Let her find out for herself and then you can be a friend to her when she needs one."

Nick makes his grand entrance, "WHAT IS UP, LAS VEGAS? COUNT ME IN!"

"OMG," says Chelsea.

Nick buys some chips, "Hit me up with a G. Deal 'em and make 'em hot."

Lucas blames at EJ for showing up with a beeping briefcase. Elvis says they need to do the search quickly. They will have a better shot if they work as a team, "What do you say."

Billie has made some calls. She asks Phillip, "Do you know anybody in Indianapolis?" Phillip can't think of anyone. Billie says she will track the joker down and find out what he has against Phillip.

"Wow," says Belle, "Look at the moon."

"Is Dad out streaking again," asks Shawn.

"No," Belle waxes poetic, "It's a silvery pathway on a bed of black velvet. Sparkly."

PrevuzeShawn whips out the rock, "Do you think it might be as sparkly as this?" He hands it to her, "Open it." Belle is stunned. Shawn takes a knee, "Belle Black, will you marry me?" Belle gives a nervous laugh. Billie crouches in the bushes waiting to swoop in on the diamond if Belle says no.


Kayla asks, "What do you think about us with a little..." Patch interrupts, "Teddy bear?" Kayla smiles, "A baby."

Ilsa says, "It won't happen again." Jeremy says, "Just do your job." Max walks up, "What job is that, Jeremy? 'Cause I'd sure like to know."

Belle is on her knees, "Will you marry me?" Shawn asks, "You're proposing to me?" Belle asks, "Are you gonna marry me or not?"

Nick yells, "I won fifty grand!" Pete, a.k.a Jerry Springer proves he can't act as he mutters something unintelligible, "Blah, blah, blah, and lots of it!" Nick says, "Thank you, Pete!"

Monday, July 23, 2007

The Streak

Stephanie and Chelsea sit in the Jacuzzi. As the water becomes increasingly acrid, they discuss Max' animosity toward Jeremy and the way he does business. Stephanie talks about how sweet and attentive Jeremy is, and shows Chelsea he bought her another present. Chelsea wonders what Jeremy must be feeling guilty about now, "Some guys are like that when they have done something wrong... they get all sweet and attentive."

Stephanie asks, "You mean like Nick got after he slept with your mom?" The water in the Jacuzzi freezes over as the cold stares lower the room temperature.

Sleazo tells Jeremy there is no way he can pull back on the deal. Jeremy says people are asking questions and he can't dodge them. Nick walks into the passenger area and Sleazo pulls a gun on him.

Roman is at Sami's apartment working on the bomb aftermath. He wants to move them to a new safe house. Sami and Lucas want to stay there.

Andre lies in traction in his hospital bed. EJ walks in and chuckles, "Don't get up." He taunts him about being Andre instead of Tony, "The moment you found out my father was considering a truce, you went behind his back. When he finds out he will not be pleased."

Andre whispers something. EJ can't hear, "What did you say?"

Stefano booms, "He said look behind you. He's paralyzed permanently and Bo Brady is responsible. We have to have a long talk, my son."

Maggie and Hope search for Nick out on the beach. Bo rushes up to them, "I just called Nick's bank. He used his credit card to purchase a ticket to Vegas. He should be landing pretty soon. While I was on the phone with his bank, I cleaned out both his checking and savings accounts and posted his account numbers on the Internet just to teach him a lesson. It's really convenient that the privacy laws in Salem are so much more relaxed than other places."

"Chelsea," gasps Maggie, "He went to find Chelsea!"

Jeremy tells Sleazo Rawlings Nick is his cousin.

Rawlings says, "Sorry if I made you soak your shorts. He leaves. Nick asks if that was a real gun. Jeremy says Rawlings is with airport security. Nick announces he has a date on the beach. Jeremy says they are in Nevada. Nick asks to lie down for a second. Too late – he faints, falls and lands in a seat.

Roman tells Sami and Lucas they are making no sense. They can't stay in their apartment. An officer walks in and gives Roman a piece of evidence they found. It's a little case. Roman opens it and finds a note in side. He reads the note, "May the two of you live happily ever after in heaven. Love EJ."

Rolf wheels Stefano out as EJ follows. EJ protests, "That is Andre in there."

Stefano says he knows it's Andre, "This is the one son that did not disappoint me. This man was the one son I could count on."

Meanwhile, inside the room, the paralyzed Andre unhooks his bandages and gets inside EJ's briefcase.

Stefano tells EJ he has disappointed him. He must reap what he sows. He calls on Rolf to wheel him back in. EJ follows. He rants at Stefano and says he has done exactly what he wanted.

Stefano rejects him and tells him to get out. EJ takes his briefcase and leaves. Stefano asks if Andre left a little surprise with Elvis.

"It's all set to go off," says Andre.

"Very well," sighs Stefano, "It is done."

Maggie frets. Bo tells her to take it easy. Maggie wonders if they can't put out an APB in Vegas. Bo says they can't since a person has to be missing 24 hours before they can do that. Bo thinks if Nick is hurt bad he will surely try to get help. Hope comforts Maggie.

Jeremy throws water on Nick's face. Nick wakes up. He's disoriented and Jeremy tells him he passed out. Jerkemy's phone rings. Nick contemplates his glass of water.

Jeremy answers. Bo asks about Nick. Maggie yanks the phone from Bo, gives Jeremy a recap of the latest gossip from Salem and asks how Nick is doing. Jeremy tells them to check back in a couple hours and he will give an update. Jeremy hangs up, "So, Geekenstein, you have everyone in Salem looking for you." Nick asks about Chelsea. Jeremy says he knows where Chelsea is but she might not be too happy when she sees him, "You know that thing about 'what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas?' That doesn't say anything about a boyfriend showing up."

Roman says, "Now you two are headed someplace safe."

Sami says, Let Stefano send all the DiMeras. Bring 'em on."

EJ steps in, "Amazing. I didn't think I could admire you any more."

Stephanie and Chelsea continue to argue. Chelsea suggests an STD test. If she comes back negative Chelsea will apologize. Stephanie huffs and walks out as Jett comes in.

Chelsea tells Jett Jeremy is cheating on Stephanie. Jett wants to talk, "We almost kissed. I could have wound up with a case of the cooties that would make Stephanie's STD look like diaper rash."

We're back at the pub. Anna walks in and finds Bo and Hope. She tells them about finding Tony on the island and bringing him back home. "He's fine," she assures them, "In fact, he's better than fine. He's amazing. Which is why I need to find Roman. If you see him would you ask him to call my cell?" She bounces out.

Hope tells Bo she thinks Roman is about to get his heart broken.

EJ asks if everyone is OK. They all determine everyone is fine, except for Nick. EJ apologizes if his family is behind this.

"Did you say 'IF,'" snorts MachoLucas.

"You're right," says EJ, "Obviously they are." EJ says he was at an SEC meeting all evening. He swears he had nothing to do with the bomb. Lucas gestures, postures and struts, "Oh, yeah, you would commit rape, but not leave a bomb!" EJ reminds Lucas they agreed to put their hostilities aside.

Stefano rants at the doctor, "We already know he is paralyzed! Either find a cause and start a treatment or I will knock this hospital down to its knees!"

"We think we're close to finding the cause," says the doctor, "We believe hitting the pavement after a nine story fall may have at least slightly contributed to his paralysis." He turns and leaves.

Tony walks in. Stefano gasps, "Tony!"

Tony sneers, "Yes, Stefano. It's so good to be back."

Bo says after all these years Hope doesn't know Roman. Bo thinks Roman will be relieved to be rid of Anna and back in the bachelor business again. Hope thinks Bo will be doing more diapers and slathering on more butt paste if he wants to make that bet. Hope suggests doubling the bet.

"What do you want me to do if I lose," asks Bo, "You want me to breast feed?"

"I want you to streak."

Bo's eyes grow wide, "You mean..."

"As the day you were born," says Hope.

"That's not gonna happen," says Bo.

"What happened to my Bo Brady," asks Hope, "My 'anything goes' Irish rebel who wouldn't think twice about risking it all on a dare?"

Bo agrees, "OK, if you win, I'll streak."

"God, you're easy," says Hope.

He moves in on her, "You've never complained about that before."

Sami tries to get he-man Lucas to back off. EJ and Lucas bicker. Sami yanks Lucas nose ring and things calm down. EJ says he will do anything he can to help. Roman wants to know if that includes turning in Stefano. Sami tells EJ if he's going to do that, it means he's in danger, too. EJ says he will do whatever it takes to protect Sami.

Sami doesn't want to go back to a safe house. Roman says they can move in with him.

Stefano tells Tony he's looking well. Tony walks over to Andre's bedside, "You look as if you went a little over the top. HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Tony accuses Stefano of having no compassion. He says the tide is turning. The people he has attacked are coming together and gaining strength. Tony will not rest until he sees Stefano and his minions get hurt, "Your reign of terror is over. Period."

Sami wants to stay in their home. So does Lucas. They want to make the place a home for the twins. Lucas promises to protect Sami and the twins. Roman OK's it. He says he will post guards outside the door. He hugs Sami and leaves. "What now," asks EJ, "Shall we have a game of hearts?"

Chelsea tells Jett she is tired of obsessing over relationships. She heads for the hot tub. He follows. She tells him the near-kiss was not a big deal. Jett says he was a jackass and was really mad at himself. He was using her to get over Danielle. Chelsea says she was using him too. They decide to forgive and forget. She invites him into the Jacuzzi. Jett hops in as Chelsea says, "What matters is not letting things that don't happen get in the way." Jett agrees.

Stefano claps and says bravo. He says Tony has a sense of drama.

Roman interrupts. He and Tony have a joyful reunion. Tony says Anna and he would like to have Roman over for dinner. Roman thinks that's a good idea.

Roman tells Stefano he missed with the bomb. Stefano acts like he doesn't know anything about a bomb. Obviously, he hasn't been watching DOOL lately. Roman says whoever planted it is trying to frame EJ, "After the smoke cleared, the smell was like an old man ready to die." Roman vows they all will soon be dancing on Stefano's grave. He suggests Stefano spend as much quality time with Andre as he can, since Andre will be going to prison. Roman leaves.

Outside, Roman tells the officer guarding the room to call if there is any trouble. Tony comes out and tells Roman to let him know if there is anything he can do. Roman asks about the key. He tells Tony to find out what lock it goes in and get his hands on it whatever the cost.

Hope wants to rip Bo's clothes off and strip him down just to practice for his upcoming streaking event. Bo says it won't happen because Roman will love his freedom.

Tony and Anna walk in and we have a joyful reunion. Tony says he told Stefano he came back to bring him down. Roman walks in. He stomps over and says a few words to Bo. Roman is in a bad mood. He says he has other things to do somewhere else. Anna chases, but Roman runs away.

Things aren't going Bo's way. Hope says, "Roman's running out before the other shoe drops." She grabs Bo's shirt... RIP! "Speaking of dropping...I don't mean shoes."

EJ says he's just trying to make everyone relax. Lucas decides to be civil. He hands EJ his briefcase, "We hate to see you go but... Cheerio. You don't want the door to hit you on the way out do you?"

Chelsea is glad she and Jett have talked all this out. Jett thinks they might become closer friends because of it. Suddenly, they both feel really hot and decide they need to cool off. They stand up and nervously talk about the strip, the moon, the weather, whatever. Jett gets out to dry off. Chelsea crawls over the ledge and slips into his arms. Of course, Jeremy and Nick walk in as Chelsea and Jett hold on to each other and giggle.

Dr. Lewis calls and asks for Roman. He wants him back at the hospital.

We pan out to see Andre's hospital room. The guard who used to be outside the door is in Andre's bed tied up and struggling. Dr. Lewis says, "We don't know how this happened."

Roman runs back out into the pub and tells them about Andre escaping, "Stefano has disappeared, too." He looks around the room and asks, "Where did Bo go."

Bo the streak comes back in and stands behind a carefully placed curtain. A small curtain. They all tell him Andre has escaped.

"Let's go get him," says Bo.

"Maybe you should put some pants on first," says Roman, "Maybe with a little luck, we'll catch someone with their pants down."

EJ says it was under different circumstances when he promised to move out of his apartment. Lucas vows to keep watching EJ. EJ looks down at his briefcase, "Is it me, or is my briefcase beeping?"

"OMG," gasps Sami. They all stare at the briefcase.


Max says, "I just want to know that you're OK." Ilsa says, "I cannot talk to you." Max says, "I'm one of the good guys. I swear, Ilsa, just talk..." Creepo interrupts, "Hey! The little lady is with me, so just back off, Jack!"

Bo asks, "Something on your mind?" Shawn says, "Yeah, I'm thinking of asking Belle to marry me."

Belle tells Phillip, "You are a girl's dream come true." Phillip beams.

Lucas shoves Sami, "Sami! It's a bomb! Get out of the way." Sami runs away, "Lucas, NO!" EJ stands there holding his briefcase.

Blogarama     Globe Of Blogs