Monday, January 30, 2006

Patrick's Boytoy

Lucas, Carrie and Sami walk into the courthouse. They can't believe Zach is gone. They can't believe Billie did it. Sami wants Billie put away for a long time. Carrie wants a little sensitivity. Lucas wants a little peace and quiet.

"There are Bo and Hope," says Carrie, "I should go offer my condolences."

Sami says, "I don't know where Austin is. He's supposed to be here."

Lucas snipes, "He's probably out planning a corporate raid."

"Oh," says Sami, "you were going to do the same thing until you found out it was St. Carrie's company. We both know it's just business. But we do stand to gain something on a personal level."

"One of us does," says Lucas, "Before you get all fired up about Austin and Carrie splitting, there is something you should know."

Caroline and Chelsea meet. She tells the brat she just talked with Max, "And I think you know what he told me."

Hope tells Bo the brat is taking this harder than she thought. She prays the little snot learns form this. Bo thinks she probably will. Carrie comes up and offers condolences, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Right now," says Hope, "there is just one thing I want. To see Billie go to jail."

Austin tells Kate Frankie has decided to take Billie's case.

Billie protests, "I don't need no stinkin' lawyer."

Frankie comes in and overhears, "I wouldn't be so sure about that."

Patrick paces and takes notes. He flashes back to talking to Billie in the police station. The ever-skeptical Patrick doesn't buy her story. Back to reality. Patrick knows Billie didn't do this. He checks the map, "Whoever is responsible would have taken this route. No one I talk to saw a thing." He sees the security camera, "I may be able to prove Billie wasn't driving that car after all."

Hope thanks Carrie for being there. Carrie says it's good to be home. She's sorry she didn't get to know Zach.

"Damn Billie Reed," cries Hope.

Bo stops her, "Don’t..."

"Don't what," snaps Hope, "Don't hate your ex-wife for killing our son? I want this over with. I'm going to see what the hold up is."

Hope leaves. Bo tells Carrie, "Hope can't accept that Billie really isn't at fault. Things are gonna get worse before they get better."

Carrie says, "This is Salem. That's the way it always happens. Only the 'better' part never comes."

Caroline and the brat talk. Caroline says Max told her how upset the little snot is about Zach. She knows it's difficult for the brat, knowing Billie is responsible. The creep says it was just an accident. Caroline says the judge is tough. The brat needs to prepare herself because of Billie's prior record. The brat wants to know, "What prior record? You mean that little bar fight?"

"Things in her past... things that might make the judge less lenient," says Caroline, "There is a good chance she could do hard time."

Billie is upset they hired Frankie behind her back. She doesn't want an attorney, "Let's just get this over with." Kate says she is going to fight. Frankie the great attorney stands there like a bump on a log while they argue. Billie finally agrees, but she's not changing her plea.

Kate begs Frankie to talk some sense into her as she leaves. Frankie tells Billie her story doesn't make sense. Billie stares.

Patrick goes into the convenience store and walks up to the clerk.

"Hiiii-hiiii, big boy. What can I do for you."

"I'd like to see the tapes from your security camera," says Patrick.

"Ooooo," says Lance, "Are you a private dick?"

"I beg your pardon?"

Lance says, "You know... like Mike hammer or my all time favorite, Shaft. If I let you see the tapes, what's in it for me?"

Sami isn't interested in what Lucas has to say. Lucas says he can save her some time and disappointment. Sami asks, "Who left who at the altar?"

"Who lied to who at the altar," asks Lucas, "I just had a conversation with my brother. He was talking about Carrie. I don't want to bore you with the details, but you don't have a snowball's chance in hell of getting him back. He said he was still in love with Carrie."

"She isn't going to take him back," insists Sami.

Lucas says, "I don't think he'll be looking for a replacement any time soon."

"He just needs time."

"When is it going to sink in," asks Lucas, "Austin will never love you as much as Carrie. He doesn’t want to be with you."

Carrie comes up as Lucas leaves and says Sami should offer condolences to Bo and Hope. Sami says they don't want her condolences. She's showing her support by being here. She asks how Carrie is doing. Carrie is feeling better. Sami helped her see Austin for what he is. Carrie asks, "What about you and Lucas?"

Sami asks, "What about us?"

Carrie says, "Is it really over between the two of you?"

Kate and Lucas run into each other. Kate tells him Billie needs support. "So do Bo and Hope," says Lucas. Kate doesn't think Billie should be blamed for this. Lucas wonders why she would drive away like she did. Kate tells him she hired Frankie. She tells him Austin is here.

"So, you haven't heard," asks Lucas, "He bought out Carrie's company in a hostile takeover. Nice guy, huh?"

Kate asks, "Why would he do something like that?"

"Apparently Nicole was trigger-happy and didn't do her homework," says Lucas, "When they found out, it was too late. The company was Carrie's baby. Now, she's trying to pull the knife out of her back."

"It's just business," says Kate.

"They do business in a different way," says Lucas, "Now Carrie wants nothing to do with him."

"I'm going to talk to her," says Kate.

"No," insists Lucas, "you're going to stay the hell out of it."

Patrick says, "Well, if it's money you want..."

"No-no," says Lance, "I don't want money, handsome. I thought maybe you could give me your number and we could have a martini down at Alice's." Patrick scribbles his number on a piece of paper and asks for the tapes.

Austin leaves Billie and Frankie to talk. Frankie tells Billie there was no way she could have killed Zach because she was on a jet at the time, "Who are you covering for?"

Caroline tells the brat, "The DA will bring up Billie's prior offenses to get the maximum sentence. But let's not worry about it until it happens."

Hope spoke to the assistant DA. It will be a closed arraignment. Only family is allowed. Hope gets a message on her cell phone, "Mommy, it's Zach. I have to speak to you form school. Mommy... pick up." Bo and Hope fall into each other's arms.

Sami assures Carrie it's over between her and Lucas.

"Now you're doing that thing with your lip," says Carrie. Sami doesn't understand. Carrie says, "That thing you do. It's the same thing you used to do when Dad wouldn't give you a cookie after dinner. You still want Lucas."

"Of course," says Sami, "But he won't have anything to do with me. I miss him and I wish things were different. But I have to move on."

"Are you sure," asks Carrie, "Maybe he still loves you."

"He doesn't," says Sami, "He hates me and will never forgive me just like you will never forgive Austin."

Kate tells Lucas she just wants to help. Lucas says whenever she butts in, things don't work out. "What about when I protected Phillip," asks Kate.


Kate throws it in reverse, "Never mind."

"Austin and Carrie have had a lot of problems in the past," says Lucas, "Maybe Carrie and I should be together."

Kate is suspicious, "Are you happy about all this?"

"Just stay out of it all right," says Lucas.

Kate says, "I have a feeling you had something to do with this."

"You give me too much credit," says Lucas, "It was Austin's fault."

Kate says, "And now you're just standing by, ready to pick up the pieces of Carrie's heart."

Austin overhears, "Over my dead body."

"Here we are, big boy," says Lance, "...the tape in question." He slaps it into the player, "Care for some popcorn?"

"No thanks."

"Well, I know it's not that kind of movie," says Lance, "but maybe laatteerr..."

"For now," says Patrick, "Let's just roll the tape."

"Your wish is my command," says Lance, "What are we looking for anyway?"

"I'll know it when I see it," says Patrick.

A customer comes in. "Oh, no," says Lance, "It's 'pays-with-pennies-guy.'" The customer drops a load of change onto the floor." Lance says, "And he just dropped all of them. I'll be right back." He flicks his wrist at the monitor, "Let me know if I'm missing anything."

The clerk sashays away. Patrick considers the possibilities, and then turns to the monitor, "Come on. Show me it wasn't Billie driving Bo's SUV."

Frankie tells Billie he knows the exact time her plane landed, and the exact time the limo picked her up, "There is no way you could have done this."

Billie insists, "I am not covering for anyone." Anyone worth a damn, anyway.

"Then you won't have any trouble with me presenting this evidence to the court."

"Damn," thinks Billie, "Where's Mickey when you need him. She says, "Frankie, no, please don't. I'm begging you. No one can now that Chelsea killed... Zach."

Caroline wants to know what is wrong with the little slime smear. The show isn't long enough to cover it all, so she claims she is just sad for her mom. Caroline tells the brat she is there for her as she goes off to check on Hope.

Hope cries. Bo tells Caroline they heard Zach on the cell phone alarm. Hope needs a moment to herself. Bo tells Caroline Hope is trying hard to be strong.

"Thank God you've got each other," says Caroline.

"I've screwed up," says Bo, "Let's go inside to talk." Inside the courtroom, he tells her he hasn't told Hope what really happened, "Billie isn't the one who hit Zach. Chelsea is."

Caroline reels back, "OMG! are you sure?"


"I was just speaking to her," says Caroline, "No wonder she was so upset."

Bo says, "She's not the one to blame. I gave her permission to drive my car. I was gonna be tougher on her but I backed down. Because of me, my son is dead." Caroline stares.

Carrie says Austin has been a disappointment. She can't ever look at him again, "At least not in the same way."

Sami decides they both have to move on with their lives. After an appropriate period of two seconds Sami tells Carrie she thinks Austin might still have feelings for her. She wants to know if it's OK with Carrie if she "pursues the possibility" of a future with him.

Austin tells Lucas to stay away from Carrie. Lucas tells him to worry about this new company that he stole from her. Austin vows to get her back. Lucas tells Austin, "You can raid as many companies as you want. But when the time comes, Titan is going to destroy you just like you did Carrie's company. Then you'll see first hand how Carrie felt when you destroyed her life."

"Bring it on man," booms Austin, "Give it your best shot. You're not going to win when it comes to Carrie."

"We'll just see," says Lucas as he walks off.

Kate tells Austin, "Lucas knows he doesn’t have a chance with Carrie."

Austin threatens, "If he has done anything to keep us apart, he is a dead man. I don't care if he is my brother."

Carrie says, "It is over with Austin and me. Go for it. Knock yourself out."

The brat calls Max and asks him to come down to the courthouse, "The truth is going to come out, and I am going to jail."

Caroline tells Bo he has to tell the truth. Bo takes out a dictionary, "Let's see... truth... oh, yeah, truth. You're right, I gotta tell Hope the truth."

Of course, Hope walks in at that point and asks, "Truth?"

Frankie says, "Your daughter is the one who hit Zach. Now this makes sense."

Billie flashes back to confronting the little creep. The brat insists, "I just thought I hit a pothole. A squishy one." Billie tells the brat she will do whatever it takes to protect her.

Back to reality. Billie tells Frankie she's not just doing this for Chelsea but for Bo, too. She tells him the story of the temporary license, "If the truth came out, Bo and Hope's marriage would be over. And so would Chelsea's whole life."

"What about yours," says Frankie, "If you go through with this, what will happen to you?" Billie stares.

Patrick plays with the remote, "That's it."

Patrick's boytoy sways back into the scene, "Find what you're looking for?"

"I think so," says Patrick, "Just a few more frames... OMG... I don't believe it!"

"Don't tell me you're looking for her," says Lance, "She comes in here all the time. She's got an attitude up to here. Hardly the criminal type. OhMyGod, what did she do." Another customer comes in. "Hold that thought," he says, "I'll be right back." He leaves.

"So that's why Billie is doing this," says Patrick, "She's protecting Chelsea!" The monitor shows the little slime job on her mission of death. Fade out with a double shot of Patrick and Billie.


Alex assures Lois, "We are both going to get exactly what we want." John comes in and asks, "What the hell would you be doing in here?"

Marlena tells Belle, "That’s the person with whom I belong. Not with your dad."

Bonnie yells, "This is not about fortune tellers. It's about Claire." Mimi asks, "Claire?" Bonnie screams, "She's Shawn's daughter, Mimi."

Patrick says, "You have to stop lying, Billie." Hope yells, "Dammit! Is anyone going to tell me what the hell is going on here?"


Anonymous applecheeks said...

I got a good laugh out of Billie with her megaphone.

Now we can add Caroline, Patrick and Frankie to the host of people who know that TS (Teen Slime) hit Zach. So, let me get it straight. The Chief of Detectives (Bo) knows. The Police Commander (Pard) knows. Heck, all of Salem know, but Chelsea is safe as long as the two department rookies don't know???? HAHAHA

6:50 AM  
Blogger Bulldog said... usual I had to LOL over the Mickey comment. If Billie really wanted to stay in jail she should've contacted him immediately.

Loved all of the pictures, especially the Claire needing a brain and nut job writers!

I'm with Applecheeks - what a farce with just about everyone in town knowing the big secret. Get on with it already!!

Thanks, Prevuze, for my morning laughs.

8:47 AM  
Anonymous KOTU said...

Other than an initial burst of rage toward whoever hit Zach, Shawn sure hasn't demonstrated a lot of grief over losing his brother. He's more interested in hanging around Belle and her baby.

Meems, are you sure you want to get involved with this chip off the old Snarly Bo block??

1:16 PM  

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