Tuesday, September 07, 2010

A Big Fat Wet One

Sami and Rafe stand in the pub hugging, quivering and slobbering on each other. Some diners decide it would be better to eat their meal at home and call for doggie bags. For other diners it's too late and they call for barf bags. Rafe says they'll tell the kids about EJ together whenever they find them. Sami decides she should go to the hospital. "I'm comin' with ya," says Rafe. They turn and leave.

Nathan sits in the Cheatin' Heart pounding down his gin and tonic with a twist, he's worried about the surgery he has to perform in a couple hours, so he orders another... a double. He remembers his argument with Chloe as, wonder of wonders, she walks in with Melanie and Phillip. The four of them share an uncomfortable hello and then Phillip suggests the Three Stooges find a table. He scoots off with Chloe. Melanie hangs back and asks Nathan about his elbow. He tells her the booze kills the pain enough that he can perform surgery. He also tells her he couldn't have gotten through his first solo without her and she gives him a goofy look.

Bo finds Stefano and Lexie at the hospital. He says there aren't many leads yet, but he's talked to Sami. Kate wonders if Sami shouldn't be more concerned since she was about to marry EJ just hours ago. Bo tells Kate Sami is already preoccupied with planning her next wedding. Carly walks up and announces, "I have news."

Meanwhile, Buzz DiMera vegetates.

Carly says EJ is much better and the docs are very hopeful right now. In Salem, hope is all the doctors have. Sami and Rafe walk in. Stares abound.

Phillip asks if Chloe is OK. She says she's just tired, but is happy things are turning out well for her. Stephanie comes in. So much for things turning out well.

Stefano goes into a rage. Rafe stops him from lunging at Sami. Stefano screams, "Did you come to dance on his grave. Even if you didn't do this you could have hired a hit man."

Bo steps in, "You wanna go there? Talk about people who hire hit men? Your boy has a lot of enemies. There are a lot of suspects. So it shouldn't take me too long to come up with one."

Sami says, "When EJ wakes up he can tell us who did it. Unless. Of course, he didn't see me."

Stephanie is back in the alley talking to Ian on the phone. Ian says he hasn't found anything out yet. Stephanie peers in the window as Melanie brings drinks to Chloe and Phillip. Melanie asks Chloe if she can throw a baby shower. Chloe OK's it. Melanie suggests a theme shower, "How about 'back alley whores who forget to use protection?" Phillip can't stand the shower talk so he goes over to see Nathan.

Nathan greets him, "Chloe seems excited."

"That's an understatement," says Phillip.

Stephanie crashes in and overhears them, "OMG, you told him?"

Carly mumbos some medical jumbo. Stefano goes for air. Bo follows. Kate goes over to Sami. She wants to talk about the phone call. "Not here," says Sami. Rafe watches.

Daniel and Carly are in with Buzz. Bo comes in and Daniel talks about pulling EJ off Nicole. He tells Bo Nicole was with him and Chloe last night, so she couldn't have done this. "Half the town has motive," says Bo. Daniel goes for test results. Bo flashes back to questioning Sami.

Rafe comes up to Sami. He wonders what Kate was saying to her. Sami says she was asking about the kids. Rafe thinks there is more, "You seem shaken." Shook up Sami insists she's not shook up. They go back with the crowd. Sami asks Stefano, "Have you heard anything?"

Stefano growls, "He's not dead, if that's what you are hoping."

Sami responds in the most articulate manner she knows how, "Go to hell." Stefano reminds her it didn't take her much time to jump from one man to the other. Rafe shuts him up as EJ's monitor beeps. That shuts everyone up and they all watch as Carly tries to fix the monitor.

Phillip and Nathan tell Stephanie they're talking about Chloe's pregnancy. Phillip leaves. Nathan says he's drunk enough to leave for surgery, so he takes off, too. Stephanie listens to Melanie talking about the shower. Melanie suggests a 'couples' shower. Phillip wretches at the mere thought of it.

Lexie runs in to assist Carly. Bo stops Stefano from going in too.

Carly comes out, "EJ is in shock from blood loss." Stefano panics. He turns and asks Lexie, "How bad is this?"

"It's serious," says Lexie. Well, I guess her medical degree is worth something. The janitor could have figured out a bullet to the brain is serious.

Stefano stammers, "So you're saying... that he might not make it?" Stefano bawls like a little girl.

Melanie and Chloe decide to go shopping for baby shower decorations. Phillip declines. Stephanie joins him after the girls leave, "I heard you talking about the shower."

"You must be the bionic woman the way you can hear things like that across the room," says the bionic man. Stephanie asks where he disappeared to during the party. He accuses her of eavesdropping, "What do you want to know" Just say it."

Nathan joins Daniel at the hospital. Daniel asks him to watch his patients while he cares for EJ. Nathan compliments Melanie on helping him, and congratulates Daniel on becoming a dad.

Kate bumps into Bo outside the pub. "I felt unresolved after our conversation," says Bo, "I thought you might know more than you were telling me." Kate says she has told him everything. She recaps how she and Stefano found EJ lying in a pool of blood.

Bo asks, "Sure there is nothing else?"

Kate says, "Bo, I'm not hiding anything."

Even though Kate probably has Bo on speed dial, Bo gives her his card and leaves.

Kate drones, "If only you knew it's Sami I might be hiding."

Rafe and Sami watch Carly work. Rafe suggests leaving. Sami says she can't. Carly comes out, "I'm leaving and Daniel will be taking over, so EJ actually might have a fighting chance." Stefano tells Lexie Dr. Jonas should have anything he needs to save Buzz.

Lexie says, "Things like that aren't up to you. It's Sami's decision."

The blood drains from Sami's face, "Why me?"

Stefano flies into a rage. Lexie says before the wedding, EJ signed a living will and named Sami as the person empowered to make his health care decisions.

"Then pull the frickin' plug," says Sami.

Maggie sits in her kitchen working on her computer as she makes the final arrangements for her trip. Victor calls and suggests stopping by and talking about the foundation. Vivian eavesdrops as Maggie brushes him off.

Victor leaves. Vivian slinks, "Maggie... it's always Maggie... Well not for long."

Melanie and Chloe are at the pub with their shopping loot. Carly joins them and they tell her about the shower. They all just can't believe what good friends they've become after the rocky start. "Whatever happened in the past, stays in the past," says Carly. Where else would it stay?

Phillip lectures Stephanie for eavesdropping. Stephanie still wants to know where he went when he left the birthday party, "Considering what happened between you and Chloe, I think things would be awkward with Daniel."

Buzz vegetates.

Stefano says he won't have EJ's life in Sami's hands. Sami flashes back to bustin' a cap in him.

Stephanie reminds Phillip he and Chloe were lovers. He reminds her that was a long time ago, "There is no old girlfriend tension there unlike the way it is with you."

"Ouch."

"If you must know," says Phillip, "I went to Titan for a meeting. Any more questions or can I go?"

"Sorry for bothering you."

"I don't think you are," says Phillip, "You're worried about something. I don't know what it is, but frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." He leaves.

Stephanie calls Ian, "If Phillip changed those results, he did it from a computer at Titan."

"Do you know his IP address," asks Ian.

"No," says Stephanie, "and Titan changes it's ISP at least once a month."

"Do either of us know what we are talking about," says Ian.

"No," says Stephanie, "But we sound cool tossing around all those initials."


Stefano rants, "She is a Brady... Nothing but a cheap little..."

Rafe shuts him up. Stefano won't accept Sami having the authority to make EJ's medical decisions. Sami offers to step aside, "I don't want that authority."

"It's not possible," says Lexie, "She can't give up the authority."

Chloe says, "I don't want a fancy schmancy shower. Just fancy schmancy gifts."

Vivian overhears, "A shower! I can't wait!"

"You'll wait a long time," says Melanie, "You're not invited."

Lexie says the only person who can change EJ's living will is EJ, "He made that clear the way he set it up. It would take a court order to get it changed."

"Then I'll call a judge to come down here and do it," says Stefano, "In fact, I'll get two of them." He leaves to make the call.

Lexie says, "EJ could rally and then we wouldn't have to worry about this."

Vivian is indignant, "I am not invited?"

"Oh good," snarks Melanie, "You got your hearing aid fixed." Vivian rambles about family. Melanie can't stand it and leaves.

Vivian gushes about Melanie, "She's so spunky. She just brightens a room when she enters."

Carly says, "And you brighten it when you leave."

Vivian asks, "Why are you two friends now?"

Chloe says, "We've bonded since you tried to destroy us."

Phillip meets Melanie outside the pub. She tells him about Vivian, "She came into the pub, sat on my lap and tried to give me a a big fat wet one. Now she wants to come to the baby shower but I don't want her to." Phillip agrees Vivian shouldn't be invited. Melanie leaves.

Stephanie is on the phone talking to Phillip's secretary, "I just don't understand why we're not receiving emails from Phillip. We have to figure this out. What is his email address?"

"dimples@titan.com."

"Great," says Stephanie, "And what is his ISP? Groundswell? Thanks."

Stephanie calls Ian and arranges to meet at her apartment.

If all the men in Salem were laid end to end, it would be the first time Roman Brady got laid in five years.

Rafe brings Sami coffee. Sami broods. Rafe reminds her EJ lied to her and kidnapped her baby. Sami says, "What he did killed any feelings I had for him. I hate him more than I've ever hated anyone. But now he's helpless. I gotta feel sorry for him, right?"

Stefano booms, "Wrong! You want him to die."

Stephanie and Ian are together in her apartment. Ian looks at the computer and announces, "Stephanie, you're not gonna like this. Your link to the Sesame Street website is broken."

Maggie continues to plan her vacation as Melanie arrives with her packages. She tells Melanie she can handle going alone, "What's wrong?"

"With me?"

"No. With the imaginary friend you came in with," says Mags, "You don't have your usual sparkle."

"Vivian is trying to stomp her way back into my life."

"I think it's because of me," says Maggie.

Chloe reminds Vivian she hired people to lie to her and make her think Daniel was running around on her. Vivian says she thinks that's old news. Chloe wants her to go away.

"Interesting," says Vivian, "I want to know what has caused this coziness between you two? Is it your hatred for me or something else?"

Stefano insists Sami wants EJ to die. Rafe reminds Stefano, "Don't forget, I provided Sami's alibi."

Stefano reminds him, "You were asleep. I will find out who did this and that person will die in pain and alone." He leaves. And we wind up where we started... with Sami and Rafe hugging, quivering and slobbering on each other.


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14 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oddly, I think I'm going to find watching the haircut is more exciting than watching the show......maybe because I know the haircut is real......

6:08 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

For other diners it's too late and they call for barf bags.

LOL!!!!! I wonder if there are enough barf bags to pass out to the viewers too.

Melanie hangs back and asks Nathan about his elbow. He tells her the booze kills the pain enough that he can perform surgery.

Here’s hoping that Nathan doesn’t have any vasectomies scheduled. Hmmm – wait a second. Rafe will be at the hospital. Maybe………

He also tells her he couldn't have gotten through his first solo without her and she gives him a goofy look.

First, it’s got to be comforting for his patients to know that Nathan can’t perform a surgery without a student nurse present, and, second, Melanie always has a goofy look on her face.

Sami says, "When EJ wakes up he can tell us who did it. Unless. Of course, he didn't see me."

Since EJ was passed out drunk, that’s easy for Sami to say.

Melanie suggests a theme shower, "How about 'back alley whores who forget to use protection?"

Prevuze – the party planner – LOL!!!!!!!!!

Melanie suggests a 'couples' shower. Phillip wretches at the mere thought of it.

In Phillip’s defense, that would be the response of most men. Last summer I attended a wedding shower with men in attendance. The guys hung out in the garage with the liquor and brought drinks to the women. Silly games and Crown Royal on the rocks – it was the best damned shower I have ever attended.

EJ signed a living will and named Sami as the person empowered to make his health care decisions.

"Then pull the frickin' plug," says Sami.

If the absence of brain activity is the deciding factor, Sami would be obliged to pull her own plug.

Stefano says he won't have EJ's life in Sami's hands.

I’m not an attorney nor do I play one on TV, and I know nothing and prove it all the time. However, I’m sure that Stefano’s attorneys would fight any attempt that Sami made to pull life support. The hospital would not want to be in the middle of a legal battle, so they would do nothing to upset the status quo. Although she may not have had a living will, Terri Schiavo’s husband and parents fought for years over control of her medical decisions.

"It's not possible," says Lexie, "She can't give up the authority."

…but she can accede to Stefano’s wishes. That won’t happen, so let’s just keep ratcheting up the level of improbability.

Anonymous – I have to agree. Considering the lack of anything resembling reality on DOOL, I thought the haircut was over and above the call of duty.

6:37 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

… gives him a goofy look.

Pardon me, Prevuze, but this is Melanie. A “goofy look” is different from her “regular look” how?

LMAO at Philip’s e-mail address and at Melanie suggests a theme shower, "How about 'back alley whores who forget to use protection?"

Sounds like a fun party and, given this is Salem, probably one that has been used many, MANY times.

I despair over the on-going “who switched the test results” plot. Basically, who cares? I sure don’t.

What I do look forward to is seeing Buzz Dimera. I just hope they weren’t shaving his head IN the operating room. Loose hairs. Unsterile shaver. I shudder just thinking about it.

Great Prevuze today. It is helping to ease me back into the work week.

6:41 AM  
OpenID idoltina said...

"If all the men in Salem were laid end to end, it would be the first time Roman Brady got laid in five years."

^^^Actually, three. He slept with Anna in 2007... But we don't have to count it if you really don't want to lol. ;)

7:16 AM  
Anonymous Judith said...

"Whatever happened in the past, stays in the past," says Carly. Where else would it stay?

This is Days, where the past will flash(back) at you in the present, then slink on by to wait in the alley of the future.

In Days, the past is always (say it with me) there for you.

8:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holy crap, this is getting more contrived by the day. Thank you, Prevuze, for eliminating my need to actually watch this garbage.

10:15 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

In Phillip’s defense, that would be the response of most men. Last summer I attended a wedding shower with men in attendance. The guys hung out in the garage with the liquor and brought drinks to the women. Silly games and Crown Royal on the rocks – it was the best damned shower I have ever attended.

Hmmm... I wonder if the guys felt the same way. I'm guessing as the party wore on and the liquor flowed, at least they didn't care.

I’m not an attorney nor do I play one on TV

Contrary to what the writers would have us believe, neither do EJ or Justin.

What I do look forward to is seeing Buzz Dimera. I just hope they weren’t shaving his head IN the operating room. Loose hairs. Unsterile shaver. I shudder just thinking about it.

I keep wondering if union rules or state law required them to bring in a licensed barber to do that scene.

Actually, three. He slept with Anna in 2007... But we don't have to count it if you really don't want to lol. ;)

I stand corrected. Going three years without getting any wouldn't be a problem Ask any guy.

10:24 AM  
Anonymous Betyar said...

This show is a mess...it's really hard to watch lately. I've gone from barf bags to just a plain old bucket! Just like Anon, the only thing making the show worthwile is EJ's buzz cut...sadly, JS's "acting" is the best performance on the show, even in his state of vegetation. He looks awfully hot just laying there on the operating table...yeah, I probably need to have my head examined just for thinking that :)

11:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

-Oh, the irony: the cold-blooded hypocritical homocidal maniac (ie Sami) being in charge of EJ's life.
-Oh the hypocrisy: "EJ lied to you & kidnappped your baby". Uh, you smug creature, you tried to illegally adopt another man's child and LIED, so you really don't have a right to pointing fingers here. Also, Sami basically did the same thing to EJ (letting him believe their daughter was dead). Ok, it may have been done unwittingly but it was no less UNFORGIVEABLE.
-Oh, the disgusting crap known as "Safe": Yuck! Steffy's right: Sami's a WHORE & I just can't stand her anymore. She used to be one of my favs but NO MORE. "It" (aka Rafe) has dragged her down the drain with him. Good job, writers....NOT!!!

12:14 PM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Late to Prevuze today but well worth the wait.

If the absence of brain activity is the deciding factor, Sami would be obliged to pull her own plug. Loved that comment, Leslie. Actually it could apply to anyone in Salem.

Question: since EJ asked Sami to marry him and they were at the makeshift alter the next day why would he have made her the authority "a few days before"? He didn't even know she'd say yes. And, a few days before, he was still in the state of I-hope-Samanther-doesn't-find-out-what-I did. For all he knew she'd find out. Did he really want her, if she did, married or not, to have the power to pull the plug? TLT.

I wonder what Nathan was swilling there at the pub right before he went back to the hospital. I'm sure it was coffee. ;)

I'm with you, Applecheeks, this whole "who switched the test results" is such a waste of time. I think it's because they can't come up with a storyline for Steponme, who's about as interesting as milk toast.

My favorite Prevuism: "Do either of us know what we are talking about," says Ian. "No," says Stephanie, "But we sound cool tossing around all those initials."

Thanks for the afternoon chuckles, Prevuze. :D

12:31 PM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

This is Days, where the past will flash(back) at you in the present, then slink on by to wait in the alley of the future.

Judity: Great statement and totally worthy to be added to our Prevuze-worthy list of snarks.

12:51 PM  
Anonymous Maggie Mae said...

"It's not possible," says Lexie, "She can't give up the authority."
So, I can name anyone as my POA and they can't turn me down?

Hmmm, I think I can work in an Obama joke here. ;)

Kate goes over to Sami. She wants to talk about the phone call. "Not here," says Sami. Rafe watches. Is Rafe going to get a teensy tinsey taste of what Sami's put EJ thru?

Thanks for watching and keeping us updated. I have 21 episodes on the DVR that I doubt I'll watch. Well, I'll FF'd thru Safe to get to the good stuff. Just EJ, the show should take five to ten minutes.

1:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kudos to JS for the commitment he's put into this sh*tty storyline. To actually have his head shaved...Bravo!
Boy, Sami is the lead candidate for Mother of the Year, isn't she? Yanking her kids away from their father (again), whom they love, then passing them off to Caroline so she can have monkey sex with Rafe (gag), then, Guess what Johnny? I was going to marry your daddy about 12 hours ago, but now I'm gonna marry Rafe! Who cares if your daddy doesn't like it, you don't have to worry about him anymore!

5:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Carly comes out, "EJ is in shock from blood loss."

We are in shock at this continued dool crapfest....

Vivian gushes about Melanie, "She's so spunky. She just brightens a room when she enters."

Carly says, "And you brighten it when you leave."

It seems like Carly has been learning Prevuze Snark...

2:57 AM  

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