Friday, January 16, 2009

Take Me Home, Bitch!

Nicole comes home to EJ. He asks, "When were you going to tell me why you are volunteering, and why I would have to find that out from Tony?" Nicole is evasive but says she bonded with the girl she brought home. EJ lectures, "You are my fiancée. I have a right to know what is going on. I don't need to hear these things from my sarcastic brother."

Nicole asks, "Do you think I am hiding something from you?"

EJ asks, "Are you?"

"Does a one-legged duck swim in circles?"

Mia huffs and puffs, "THE BABY IS COMING!"

Kayla advises John not to trust Charlotte.

Charlotte panics when she figures out someone saw the video on her computer.

Brady shows Marlena the video of John's hypnotherapy. She watches as John calls her the love of his life.

Marlena screams, "That's our John! He's squinting! "

"And Charlotte Taylor is lying," says Brady.

Sami bolts from the bathroom ranting, "The hot water is gone again!"

Rafe gets off the phone and is distant. He turns to Sami, "Hilda was murdered."

Sleazo accesses Hilda's file on the computer, "Show me where they're hiding that cute little thing. And Sami, too... the one who's going to die tonight."

Rafe zones as Sami begs him to tell her what happened. She asks if Hilda died because of her. Rafe says she wasn't even working on Sami's case any more. Sami tells Rafe Hilda was just there, when he was in the shower. It takes a while for Rafe to get it, but says that's the day the bureau thinks she was murdered, "Probably right after she left here."

Sleazo computes, "Take me home bitch! Show me the money! AHA!" He finds Sami's picture.

John gets hysterical on the video as Marlena tells Brady to turn the computer off, "What you did was unethical!"

Brady asks, "But you watched the video. Wasn't that unethical?"

"Ethics never did much for me." Marlena wonders why Charlotte would tell John he never remembered anything.

Brady says, "Charlotte Taylor has been messing with my dad's head!"

"You shouldn't get so shook up over something that trivial," says Marlena.

John thinks Blondie put Kayla up to this. Kayla tells him about the fight Charl and Marl had over John, "At one point I thought she was going to hit Marlena. I have doubts about her mental state."

"Me too," says John, "And I have doubts about Charlotte's mental state, too."

Kevin the Geek comes up to look at Charlotte's laptop. She wants him to find out who broke into it.

Rafe thinks their location hasn't been compromised yet, "If the killer knew where we are, he'd already be here. I figure we have to get out, though. So tell me what else happened."

"Wah, wah, wada, snot, wah, wah."

Rafe yells, "Come on, Sami! Your life, my life and your baby's life they all depend on it."

Marlena tells Brady he can't confront Charlotte. She wonders why she would keep this from John, "He said he loved me!"

"That's why she would keep it from him," says Brady, "She's trying to protect him."

"My prayers are answered," says Marlena, "The real John is coming home to us!"

The audience boos.

John asks, "You're saying that my shrink needs a shrink."

"I'm saying you should talk to her," says Kayla.

"Talk to the crazy person," says John, "I can handle that. I have a lot of experience after being around Marlena and Belle all these years."

Kevin checks Charlotte's computer, "Someone sent the file as an email." Keys click and the computer whirs. "AHA! The email went to a Dr. Marlena Evans!"

"You're a genius," says Charlotte, "How did you figure that out? "

"The name, 'Dr. Marlena Evans' right here where it says, 'TO:' tipped me off."

Sami tells Rafe about going to see Sister Teresa, "So... You can lecture me if you want."

"Why should I lecture you," asks Rafe, "Since you are not long for this world. You probably just signed your own death warrant."

"No problem," says Sami, "My experience with that has been that the governor always calls at the last minute."

Marlena apologizes, "I'm sorry for making this all about me. Even though it is." She tells Brady she will handle things, "When I am finished with Charlotte she will be praying to get her life back."

"I see," says Brady, "So your plan is to let her run away with old John."

Nicole thinks EJ's question is offensive, "And so is your smart ass brother." She insists she's turned over a new leaf. Poison ivy. She says she's just been too busy to tell him and she's only been at the youth center a couple of days, "I'm not a Sami Brady who runs to you with every little problem." EJ backs off and says he overreacted. Hugs and love. He tells her he's been withholding information. He says he keeps business info from her. Nicole supports him, "You are the best person I know. I hope you can forgive me."

"Why would I have to forgive you," he asks.

"Because," she says, "I've been keeping something from you."

Prevuze

Sami goes off the scale. Rafe screams, "Ten minutes ago you were crying your eyes out because Hilda had her brains splattered all over the sidewalk. Why did you go to see sister Teresa?"

"I want to protect my unborn child."

"I hope you worked out the details with her," says Rafe, "Because it's the last time you will see sister Teresa. If Hilda was killed outside this building, the killer is probably canvassing the neighborhood and if someone saw you they will tell him about it for pocket change."

Sleazo works the computer, "Hilda, you've been a good little helper. He gets the coordinates. 41.50.13 North 87.41.06 West. Gotcha!"

Ladies and gentlemen, that ends the debate. If those coordinates are correct, Salem is located somewhere near the border between China and Mongolia.

Nicole says there are actually two things she's been keeping from EJ. First, she shows him the ultrasound. She also says she will be doing some traveling for her charity work. EJ objects to that because of her condition. Nicole snaps, "I'm pregnant! I don't have a disease."

"I'm not sure about that," says EJ, "You're showing the symptoms of foam rubber poisoning. I really wish you would tell me these things!"

"I JUST DID, BONEHEAD!"

EJ decides he will go with her. Nicole vetoes that. He gets a call and goes off to take it. Nicole hisses, "Tony! Blabbermouth!" Nicole gets a call. Mia tells her about the big event.

Charlotte rants as John walks in. He asks what she and Blondie fought about. Charlotte says she refused to talk about their last session and Marlena got hysterical. Kayla had to intervene. John says Kayla told him Charlotte is not to be trusted.

Marlena is on the phone with Dr. Hanson asking about Charlotte.

Sami bawls. Rafe taunts, "What? No witty comeback?"

Sami shows him and gives him her wittiest comeback, "Blather, blabber, bawl, wah, wah, wah." Rafe tries to reassure her as Sami regresses from an adolescent to a two year old.

"Don't worry," says Rafe, "I have somewhere else to take you. It even has hot water. How about that?"

"Wah, wah, wah, bawl, sob, slobber."

Rafe vows to take the killer down, "I'm gonna nail the bastard."

EJ talks on his phone as he comes into the pub. He finds Brady and asks to talk to him. Brady tells him he doesn't want to talk about Nicole and leaves, "Chow."

"Not at this slophouse," says EJ.

Mia lies in an office at Dr. Baker's clinic and holds her tummy as Nicole barges in. "What's wrong," cries Nicole, "Is it the baby?"

Charlotte is indignant, "Who the hell is Kayla to pass judgment?"

"She's the hospital's Acting Chief Busybody," says John. He thinks Blondie might be jealous of the time he and Charlotte are spending together. He thinks therapy is more trouble than it's worth, "I'm not coming back."

Sami surfs TV stations as Rafe runs around packing so they can bug out. Rafe shouts, "This is no time to be watching TV!"

"I can't miss Days Of Our Lives," whines Sami, "I've been watching it for years. How do you think I got to be such a nutcase? Besides, I want to get the weather channel and see what the weather's like."

"IT'S COLD," screams Rafe, "What more do you need to know?" Rafe gets a call which ends the gripping dialog, "Huh? What did they say?"

Marlena thanks Dr. Hanson for the info. She hangs up, "I knew it!"

John says, "I'm digging in a graveyard where there are no bodies left."

That's because on this show everyone comes back from the dead," says Charlotte. She decides she will stand by John's decision.

"See you around," says John as he leaves. Charlotte trashes her office.

Mia says the baby is OK. "Then why were you crying," asks Nicole.

"I'm a female," says Mia, "I don't need a reason."

Dr. Baker barges in. He says Mia is not in labor, "You were having Braxton Hicks Contractions."

"What's that," asks Mia.

Dr. Baker explains, "Braxton and Hicks are DOOL writers. They write in fake contractions all the time. Sometimes the woman doesn't even have to be pregnant." He tells her to be prepared for the real thing.

Rafe says the killer got into the FBI's main computer with Hilda's ID, "Now he knows cases and locations if he knows how to read the secret codes."

"What secret codes," asks Sami.

"Latitude and longitude, like every kid can read on a GPS."

Nicole sneaks around. EJ asks where she's off to.

Brady joins John at the pub. He tells John Dr. Taylor isn't who she says she is.

Dr. Taylor arrives at Marlena's place to "chat."

Sleazo sneaks into the safehouse. He finds Sami's bag and throws it.

Rafe and Sami arrive at the convent. Rafe says all the safe houses are listed in the main computer, so she has to stay there. Now she gets to spend as much time as she wants with Sister Teresa. He can't promise she's safe until the killer is gone, though.

Sleazo tosses the safehouse. We flash from mini-scene to mini-scene in the breathtaking ending... Sami... Rafe... Sleazo... Oh, the drama!


Previews
========

You can watch the previews later today on our PREVUZE II website. Prevuze II should be up no later than noon, Eastern Time.

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21 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"My prayers are answered," says Marlena, "The real John is coming home to us!"

The audience boos.

NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's the last straw! Bringing real John back is so wrong.

When will our prayers be answered? When will EJ show a brain and since when does he not like Tony? It's a scooby doo ending!

4:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sleazo works the computer, "Hilda, you've been a good little helper. He gets the coordinates. 41.50.13 North 87.41.06 West. Gotcha!"

Ladies and gentlemen, that ends the debate. If those coordinates are correct, Salem is located somewhere near the border between China and Mongolia.


Uhm, no, it puts them just east of Chicago. If the longitude had been EAST, they'd end up near China/Mongolia, but you wrote West.
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=41.5013,++-87.4106&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=46.764446,58.974609&ie=UTF8&ll=41.501378,-87.409973&spn=2.781082,3.685913&z=8

4:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Monday might actually be worth watching, imagine that!!

4:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok now Salem is far to close to home for comfort! Though that would explain how Belle and Shyawn got to Canada so quickly when they were on the run! It's just a hop skip and a broken truck away!
I guess I should keep an eye out for Charlotte when she decides to 'skip' town, she just might pass through.
LOL

5:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nicole asks, "Do you think I am hiding something from you?"

EJ asks, "Are you?"

"Does a one-legged duck swim in circles?"


Is the pope Catholic? Is a bullfrog waterproof? I am sure the comparisons are endless.

"Show me where they're hiding that cute little thing. And Sami, too... the one who's going to die tonight."

Promises, promises.

John gets hysterical on the video as and Marlena tells Brady to turn the computer off, "What you did was unethical!"

No, what he did is criminal. By the way, why does Charlotte want to run away with Jawn?

"No problem," says Sami, "My experience with that has been that the governor always calls at the last minute."

Rod Blagojevich has been impeached so Sami could be in quite a pickle.

"Because," she says, "I've been keeping something from you."

Stop the presses? What could Nicole possibly be keeping from EJ? That the DiMera mansion is completely out of toilet paper? There’s not a square to spare. Does anyone actually think that Nicole is going to tell EJ about the baby?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~crickets~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The writers keep setting up these ridiculous teases, and absolutely no one is buying into them. If they think the viewers are falling for this tactic, they have got to think we are crazier than Nicole. The only thing to be thankful for is that Nicole isn’t going to have the gestation period of an elephant. This heinous fake pregnancy storyline should be ending shortly…please, Lord, please!

Mia lies in an office at Dr. Baker's clinic and holds her tummy as Nicole barges in. "What's wrong," cries Nicole, "Is it the baby?"

What was your first clue Sherlock?

"I want to get the weather channel and see what the weather's like."

"IT'S COLD," screams Rafe.


To be exact, it is -13 degrees at O’Hare with a wind chill that makes it feel like -35 degrees. In other words, it is tush numbingly cold in the Windy City this morning. Thank goodness Prevuze provides the warmth needed to thaw out my frozen brain, and now Prevuze is the best weather blog on the Internet!

LHrules - If Salem is just east of Chicago, that means Salem is in the middle of Lake Michigan. It figures. Happy TGIF and keep warm all you faithful Prevuzites!!!

5:42 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Marlena screams, "That's our John! He's squinting!"

Don’t know about a squint yet, but I’ve definitely noted some jaw clenching. And Jawn’s fabulously freaky hairdo is disappearing. Boooooo.

Charlotte, "How did you figure that out? " "The name, 'Dr. Marlena Evans' right here where it says, 'TO:' tipped me off."

What I want to know is how Char knew that someone had been in her computer?

41.50.13 North 87.41.06 West

Ladies and gentlemen, that ends the debate. If those coordinates are correct, Salem is located somewhere near the border between China and Mongolia.


Now, to be fair, Prevuze, they never said that the safe house was in Salem. Perhaps it IS in Mongolia and everyone just uses the Salem transporter to get to and fro.

Sami shows him and gives him her wittiest comeback, "Blather, blabber, bawl, wah, wah, wah."

Now THERE is some intelligent dialog.

LOL at Bulldog's picture of Shawn's boat and Nicole's reference to that famous Stuckey's pecan log. (Though I wonder if the younger members of our readership even know what Prevuze is talking about there. HAHAHA)

I'm also relieved to finally find out the REAL story behind those pesky Braxton-Hicks contractions.

Thanks for all the great info today, Prevuze. I'm now a little more informed and a lot entertained.

6:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LHrules, I followed your link, which places them by Gary, Indiana - now I can't get that song out of my head!

7:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kayla questions Charlotte's mental state. What about Marlena's mental state!? I've questioned that for years.

How conveeeeeeenient Mia is starting to have some problems just as Safe move into the convent. How are they going to get Nicole around to finding out about Sami's baby so she can go after it - have Mia decide to keep hers? She'd better skip town with it then because I think Nicole is such a nutjob at this point she would track her down and just kidnap it.

LOL over "Chow. 'Not at this slophouse' says EJ". and the foam rubber poisoning. However. The points that Prevuze earned for that are immediately deducted for this one "Why are you crying" asks Nicole. "I'm a female," says Mia, "I don't need a reason."
Boo, Prevuze, Boo-Hoo.

Otherwise an excellent Prevuze on a snowy, frozen Friay. TGIP! :D

7:24 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Uhm, no, it puts them just east of Chicago.

If Salem is just east of Chicago, that means Salem is in the middle of Lake Michigan.

I followed your link, which places them by Gary, Indiana - now I can't get that song out of my head!


My calculator actually put it just north of the intersection of the Stevenson Expressway and Western. Truth be known, I decided to use the + coordinate because it was funnier to put it in Mongolia. You know the rule, Prevuze does not guarantee accuracy. We do, however, take fiendish delight in promoting obfuscation.

8:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I heard that Sami panics and calls Lucas who tells Chloe where she is at, and then Chloe finally spills everything to Nicole, and Nicole goes running to the covenant, overhears Sami talking to the Sister ,aproaches the Sister with the helping pg mothers in trouble bit, etc etc etc........

I am still wondering what happened to Stephano having the manison bugged with camera's and such and not seeing Nicole's rubber baby bumper............

8:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the coordinates on the FBI computer were meant to obfuscate us!!! Truly, Salem's position should be somewhere in Canada where they are unfortunate enough to see Dayz a whole day earlier than the rest of us 49 below. If they miss Prevuze's dire warnings to stay the hell away from the TV set, they are screwed for the entire day! And that could go on for weeks!!! Although, I must say the show on Monday actually looks promising. Oh, the suspense!

Thanks Bulldog, the pic of Shawn's boat was a hoot!

Berg asked "when will EJ show a brain?" I believe he is due for his annual physical...the catscan should reveal that all his brain cells are gone by now...unless Kayla is the one reading the results. I'm certain she would interpret his brain activity as the results of his sperm cell count.

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

EJ is so stupid.

10:09 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Marlena screams, "That's our John! He's squinting!"

I always read Prevuze at my desk during my lunch hour and I laughed so loudly at this that the person nearest me asked me what was so funny.


Leslie: I agree. I think at this point what would really shock me is if someone told the truth right up front instead of it being dragged out for weeks on end.

10:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I tried those coordinates and came up with the GE Spacenet building at 3111 S Western Ave, Chicago. Funny, it has a bunch of satellite dishes. Be funny if was where Prevuze is located.

10:22 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Funny, it has a bunch of satellite dishes. Be funny if was where Prevuze is located.

That's us! Did you notice the place where the cable crosses the river and a tree has fallen on it?

10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, the "24" ending on the prevuzeprevuze got me. But it makes sense, Daze drags out its days too.
And is Kevin the computer geek the same as Mimi's old boyfriend Kevin? Inquiring minds... Or do these writers only have about 10 names that they keep reusing?

11:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I haven't seen days in months, but just reading prevuze reminds me how much I miss it. By 'it' i'm referring to how much i miss prevuze haha. Just one question why is Sami in the witness protection????

12:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Question: if they know the killer is on his way to the safe house, why wouldn't they have some kind of ambush there to arrest the guy? just asking

12:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sami is in the witless protection program becasue she saw someone kill the mayor. The real reason is they needed someplace to stick her while Ali was pregnant.

1:14 PM  
Blogger fwickafwee said...

Hey Leslie, nice Seinfeld reference!! not a square to spare

8:26 PM  
Blogger Quiet one said...

Oh my...I have been away for weeks and look at all that I've missed!! The snark and the pictures...the reader comments...I really must skip the gym and just read Prevuze everyday. Okay, so I DON'T go to the gym but it sounded good, right? Thanks for the laughs!

10:20 PM  

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