Friday, March 28, 2008

She Blows Up Like A Puffer Fish

EJ barges into Sami's apartment, "Honey, I'm home!" He picks her up and twirls her around the room. Sami squeals and tells him to put her down. EJ sets her down and clears his throat, "I guess that might have been a little inappropriate."

"Could you please knock for once," asks Sami. EJ says he shouldn't have to knock when he's coming into his apartment. They argue about whose apartment it is. "It's our apartment," booms EJ.

"What are you talking about," asks Sami.

"My marvelous news."

Chelsea is with her private nurse as Nick comes in. He has marvelous news, too. Maybe they both heard DOOL has been canceled. Nick says he'll share it when Max and Stephanie arrive.

As she leaves, the nurse cautions Nick, "Don't get her too excited." Chelsea wiggles her eyebrows up and down.

Ava is excited about getting back with Patch. Hope/Kayla is excited because this thing will be over. Ava says, "I know you think he's gonna want to stay with you, don't you?"

Hope/Kayla says, "And if he does?"

Ava says, "Well that won't be good for any of us."

They continue bickering until Hope/Kayla brings up the fact that Ava sabotaged the plane, "Three people died in that crash! Well, actually there were two deaths and one needless suicide."

Ava insists she didn't kill anyone. She tosses her cousins under the bus for that one. She insists the plane was never supposed to get off the ground. As they deplaned Patch would have snuck away and come to her and talked about the old days, "He would have remembered he loved me. And then... happily ever after."

Hope reminds her Patch got off the plane. Ava says it wasn't like it was supposed to be so she ran. She's sorry about the deaths. Hope/Kayla snaps, "Sorry doesn't bring them back!" Ava asks about Hope/Kayla's father. Hope/Kayla tells her he gave up his life for his son, "He didn't die in the crash. He died at 30,000 feet."

Nick wonders where Max and Stephanie are. He'll tell all when they get there. Morgan arrives. Chelsea says, "Nick has some big exciting news to share."

Morgan gasps, "What is it?"

Nick says, "I don't want to say until Max and Stephanie get here. It'll save time if I can bore the whole bunch of you at the same time." Morgan asks if she can stay for the big whoop. Finally Max and Stephanie arrive.

EJ agrees, "OK – no more swinging you around like a rag doll." He tells her he's just come back from the INS, and they actually showed a little compassion, "All we need to do is show them that we are married in more than just name only." Sami cocks her head and gives him a look.

Hope fills Ava in on the flight of death, "OMB died like he lived – sucking, because he gave his mask to Bo."

So, Nick drops the big news. He got both renewable energy grants he applied for. Morgan takes the opportunity to crawl all over Nick as Chelsea wretches. Max broods. Stephanie asks whets wrong. Max insists he's excited and congratulates Nick. He decides he has to run. Stephanie grabs him on the way out. Max says he's happy for Nick and leaves.

Sami insists the vows they took didn't have anything to do with love, "So what do I have to do?"

EJ smiles, "What I want you to do is what you do better than anyone else. It's something you did well at our wedding ceremony and you do it on a daily basis. I want you to lie through your teeth."

Hope/Kayla continues the saga of the plane of doom. Ava sniffles but denies she's crying. She says nothing like that was supposed to happen, "What was your father's last name?"

"Brady."

What was his first name?"

"OM."

Ava knocks and tells Angelo she has to leave. Angelo protests but finally caves in. Ava tells him to watch Hope/Kayla. As she walks out, she says, "Shawn Brady."

Max carries beer to OMB's grave. He pours OMB a glass and has one himself. He tells OMB Nick got his grant. "Nick makes mistakes from time to time," says Max, "He needed a little guidance." Max says he knows he'll never go back to school. Right now he's cool with running the pub and taking care of Caroline. But he wants to find something else so he can take care of Stephanie.

"She's your niece," says OMB, "People will talk."

EJ holds the totally SORASed little Johnny. Sami thinks she has done enough lying for EJ, "I want to hear you beg."

EJ plays his trump card, "Do it for Johnny."

Sami agrees, "What's the plan?"

"Pretty simple," says EJ, "You have to love me."

Sami huffs, "We have to be realistic." Meanwhile, Johnny leafs through brochures trying to decide which college to attend next year.

Nick rambles about the grants. Chelsea wonders where Max is. "He had to go," says Stephanie.

"He's been away a while," says Chelsea, "He could have just used the bathroom next door."

Ava walks up to OMB's grave. Max wonders who she is. "I'm nobody," says Ava, "Were you related to him?"

"He was my father," says Max.

"He was Kayla's father, too," says Ava, "So it would be totally inappropriate for you to date her daughter, wouldn't it?"

"Did you know him," asks Max.

"No," says Ava, "A friend told me about him."

"He was the best man I've ever known," says Max, "Not the smartest, though."

Ava puts flowers on OMB's grave. She asks Max to tell her a little about him. "He was from Ireland," says Max, "He had a pub in Salem and in recent years gained a bit of fame as the poster boy for Alzheimer's." Max goes on and on. Ava thinks OMB sounds wonderful.

Max starts to leave. As he turns, OMB asks, "Hey, Max, could I have a refill on that beer?"

Ava whimpers, stoops and apologizes to OMB.

EJ and Sami arrive at Chez Rouge. They tell Maggie they are there to meet the INS guy.

Maggie senses a juicy story brewing, "Are you having visa problems."

"Yes," says EJ, "We've gone over our limit."

Maggie shows them to the table. Sami and EJ start bickering to prove they are married.

Hope wanders around the room looking for a way out. She picks up a small bust and uses it as a hammer on the window lock. If anyone knows how to make the best use of a small bust, it's Hope.

Nick rambles about the grant. The girls are so drowsy you'd think they were watching a DOOL marathon. Max comes back and picks up right where Nick has left off rambling on and on about the virtues and oh-so-complex molecular structure of hydrogen, "It only has one electron, but it's kind of hard to keep track of. There is a lot of hydrogen in ice. I saw that on TV once."

"If ice has a lot of hydrogen," asks Morgan, "What about water?"

"It evaporates when the ice melts," says Max the genius.

"But I thought water was H2O," says Morgan

"See," says Max, "That proves it. Water has H's, but no hydrogen."
Nick takes over and continues his diatribe.

Morgan goes up to Max and lectures him for nearly ruining Nick's project. Max insists Nick is his friend, "The machine wouldn't have worked anyway... uh, I just needed a piece of paper for a phone number."

"Just be happy I told only Nick," snorts Morgan. Stephanie drags Max away.

Ava sits in the back of her limo talking to Daddy on the phone. Daddy agrees to do something for her. Ava hangs up and remembers her silk sheet romp with Patch.

Hope pounds and the window comes open. The alarm goes off as Hope considers the long drop.

EJ and Sami continue to bicker as the INS guy takes notes. Sami decides EJ's fish is too dry and overdone, so she calls the waiter over and tells him to take it back and bring him another, "EJ likes his fish rare. Except for sushi, which he likes really well done."

Sami puts about a half ton of salt on her food. EJ tells her to cool it and turns to the INS agent, "Samantha has to watch how much salt she uses. She blows up like a puffer fish.

Burke asks about their daily routine. EJ fields that one, "We spend a lot of time taking care of the kids and then, of course, there's the incessant love making."

"When he's able to perform," says Sami.

EJ chuckles, "Very funny."

Burke asks about the fact they have separate apartments. They insist they live together, but EJ just has his stuff in his other apartment. "EJ doesn't like change," says Sami, "So he watches DOOL." He tells Mr. Burke he's looking for a job. "The bills are piling up," says Sami, "So we have to cut into our lovemaking so EJ can find some time to look for work."

Maggie comes to the table and announces EJ has a phone call. He excuses himself and smooches Sami as he leaves. One kiss leads to another until Sami cuts things off.

Once he walks away, Maggie tells him there isn't a call, "It looks like things aren't going well." The town busybody has a plan to come to the rescue.

Burke asks if Sami loves her husband. Sami gulps.

Nutty Ava obsesses, "I'll give that SOB one minute and then things will get ugly."

As the alarm blares, Angelo rushes in and grabs Hope/Kayla, "Someone's being a very naughty little girl." He tells her to just sit back and relax as he moves a little closer. Hope/Kayla whaps him away.

The following is a Prevuze public
service announcement.

Beginning on February 17, 2009, the Federal Communications Commission has mandated a switch to a new format of television broadcasting. Beginning on that date, your over-the-air television set will become useless. From that point forward, it will only receive Days Of Our Lives.

Previews
========

You can watch the previews later today on our PREVUZE II website.

34 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

EJ barges into Sami's apartment, "Honey, I'm home!"

Boy, I am certainly on my knees giving thanks to the soap opera gods!! Finally, DOOL is worth watching again.

Ava insists she didn't kill anyone. She tosses her cousins under the bus for that one.

Hopla, you’ve got some evidence. Call the FBI, the CIA, anyone but the Salem PD, and get this storyline moving!!!

EJ smiles, "What I want you to do is what you do better than anyone else. It's something you did well at our wedding ceremony and you do it on a daily basis. I want you to lie through your teeth."

In keeping with March Madness, that one should be a real slam dunk for Sami.

Hope wanders around the room looking for a way out. She picks up a small bust and uses it as a hammer on the window lock. If anyone knows how to make the best use of a small bust, it's Hope.

Prevuze, that one is excellent!!!

Once he walks away, Maggie tells him there isn't a call, "It looks like things aren't going well." The town busybody has a plan to come to the rescue.

OK, it appears that Lucas’ Aunt Maggie is working on his Uncle Mickey to give EJ a job. When all of this goes down, does that mean that Lucas will disown the Hortons and change his last name back to Roberts? Can Lucas be spend enough time in the slammer to emerge with a marketable job skill? I wonder how many jobs openings there are for people with a talent for making license plates.

Great, great Prevuze, and of course, I love the picture with the Eliot Spitzer reference!!!

5:24 AM  
Anonymous Apple Bottom said...

OMG, after weeks of dreary DAYS, it's sounding like Monday's show will return to the soap I want to watch.

If Mickey hires EJ does that mean Mickey's firm might really win a case?

EJ and Sami do act like a married couple, bickering and no sex. Love them!!

5:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lovely. The Blinking Wonder has slithered his way back onscreen.
Instead of conserving electricity on Saturday night from 8 til 9, I think I'll turn everything off on Monday afternoon from 1 to 2.

5:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Mickey hires EJ does that mean Mickey's firm might really win a case?

Not necesisarily, but at least they would have a track record of getting guys out of rape charges.

5:56 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Prevuze, you were in rare form today.

Altho I do disagree with one Prevuism - I always thought Hope's probable implants make her look out of proportion to her skinny bod. Like if you stuck an apple on a stick and pushed it down on the stick a little. There's Hope.

I'm still laughing over "What's his first name?" "OM". And He lived as he died - sucking. HAHAHAHA

Thanks for the PSA reminder! Prevuze will get me thru a long day. :D

6:04 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

"What was your father's last name?"
"Brady."
"What was his first name?"
"OM."


If anyone knows how to make the best use of a small bust, it's Hope. Meeeeooooowww!

Yes, both were mentioned already. But they were so good I felt another kudo was called for.

I do believe DAYS is setting Ava up to be redeemable. Her overzealous bodyguard/cousins can be blamed for the plane crash. She's been decent to Hokey. After a stint with Marlena I can see her becoming a regular.

That would bring her mob-father into the mix as a neeewwwwww bad guy. General Hospital has had a lot of luck with mob stories, I guess DAYS wants a piece of the action.

Deb – Nick’s grants are for a renewable energy source and Max is troubled by it. By George! Proof that DOOL is stealing Prevuze and Daze of Our Lives material. They lifted it straight from your March 13 s/l – “About Max”! LOLOL

Another GRRREEAAAATTT Prevuze!

6:47 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

OMG, after weeks of dreary DAYS, it's sounding like Monday's show will return to the soap I want to watch.

Lovely. The Blinking Wonder has slithered his way back onscreen. Instead of conserving electricity on Saturday night from 8 til 9, I think I'll turn everything off on Monday afternoon from 1 to 2.


Prevuze is an open forum and welcomes differing points of view.

7:03 AM  
Anonymous Victoria said...

Hooray! Glad EJ and Sami are back, the only ones worth watching!
Loved the Max pic about being a good uncle!LOL

7:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've really, really enjoyed the last 3 weeks without EJ. I was hoping they'd give him a permanent, preferably 6' under, rest. I guess I'll be tuning out until Lucas gets back in May.

Thanks for the recaps.

7:25 AM  
Anonymous dazeisdum said...

So are we to believe that Max is some super genious who looked at Mr. Geeks (Nick) planes, noticed a mistake and corrected it?? All without having stepped foot into any kind of educational establishment? Ok I was just making sure. Where are they going to take this stupid story line?? The writers missed a perfect opportunity to kill Chelsea off during the operation and they missed it. Killing her off would of meant less time with the unlce/niece ewwwwwfest. And certainly less time with Mr. lowselfesteem Nick. Grr....sometimes I really wonder why I watch this show???
Ok rant over.

7:29 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

Applecheeks:
I have known forever that DOOL is stealing my and Prevuze's ideas.

My question is, where are our checks????

Dazeisdum: Remember at one time, Max and Shawn designed and built a totally new type of race car engine, including the fuel source.
So it follows that Max SHOULD know something about chemical formulas and engineering.
But then again Max SHOULD still be a race car driver, have his own garage, and NOT dating his niece.

THANK GOD! Sami and EJ are back.
How old did Johnny look? 2? 15? 33?
Doesn't matter, at least I'll be able to watch at least part of DOOL now.

New blog post today, YES YES YES to those who begged and whined like they were on DOOL, it is Part II. And before you ask, Part III will be tomorrow.
These Are The Daze Of Our Lives

8:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

GLAD TO SEE EJ AND SAMI ARE BACK - AND NOW WITH THIS PREVIEW ON AVA I MAY ACTUALLY DECIDE TO WANT TO SEE MORE OF THE WACKADOODLE - I'M A SUCKER FOR REDEMPTION, DEFINATELY CAN TELL A CHANGE IN PACE (SLOWER)WITH THE OLD WRITERS - WOULD'VE BEEN NICE FOR A HAPPY MEDIUM, NICE JOB PREVUZE

8:53 AM  
Blogger cfish said...

Deb said...
I have known forever that DOOL is stealing my and Prevuze's ideas.

My question is, where are our checks????

OMG, Deb and Prevuze!!! PLEASE don't go on strike!!! You're the only thing about DOOL that keeps me sane! If you go on strike, I just might have to hunt down an old boyfriend and kidnap his pregnant wife ... :-)

9:22 AM  
Anonymous Mitzi said...

What's the deal with Morgan having a Southern accent all-of-a-sudden?! She didn't used to have one, then, when I was watching yesterday's episode, she did! How strange! Any thoughts?

9:24 AM  
Blogger cfish said...

And re Ava's possible redemption -- we all know that after one session with super-shrink Marlena and she'll be as right as rain, so let's just cut to the chase, shall we? Frankly, I'm rapidly approaching the "I-don't-give-a-damn" threshold with this whole storyline!

9:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank You Prevuze for another day of excellent entertainment! For the first time in 3 weeks it looks like an epi I can watch almost zapper free. Thank TPTB that EJ and Sami are back! Their scenes look fab and I can't wait for Monday. Nicole should really spice things up when she makes her appearance! I'm interested to see the new SOARSed Johnny how old is he now?

9:58 AM  
Anonymous Scolly said...

Just watched Prevuze II. Since Bo is such an idiot why don't they strap him down??

Just wondering.

10:25 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

I'm interested to see the new SOARSed Johnny how old is he now?

How old did Johnny look? 2? 15? 33?


OK. By popular demand... Heeeeeeere's Johnny! Click here to see Johnny.

10:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sorry but E.J. and Sami bore me to death. I for one will not be watching the show. For the record...I'm not a Lumi fan. I just hate Sami no matter who she is with.

12:10 PM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

OK. By popular demand... Heeeeeeere's Johnny!

Lucas is supposed to back in Salem shortly. Since he was supposed to get between 10 and 15 years in the crowbar hotel, I expected Johnny to be a teenager. Since I am childfree and know nothin’ about birthin’ babies, can anyone give me a clue as to how old that baby might be?

12:38 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

I just hate Sami no matter who she is with.

At least you're consistent.

1:03 PM  
Blogger Firstfall said...

"OK. By popular demand... Heeeeeeere's Johnny!"

LOL! Love it Prevuze! And thank you!

Glad to see EJ & Sami finally back.

And Scolly, I agree. Maybe they should strap Bo down - for his own safety! :)

1:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok, so I just have to add my 2 cents worth. Sami is my fav character on DOOL, and I can't stand the scenes with EJ. I just don't get what people like about EJ, he is a creep, a rapist, a spoiled brat, egotistical, and a DiMera. I love Sami and Lucas together and look forward to Lucas' return. I've watched Sami and Lucas since they were both very young, and they have always have great chemistry together. This storyline that Sami had twins by two different men is crazy, and I can't wait til they fix it and make both the twins Lucas'. BTY, when are we going to figure out that Lucas didn't shoot EJ, it was Will?

Sorry, just had to rant. I'm better now!

1:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the Anon leaving those crazily negative comments about EJ is the same person trying to act like different people. JMO.

Whoever you are - whether you are one person, or more than one - ya gotta calm down!

2:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Morgan has had a southern accent since day one, just FYI.

2:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

omg, Johnny looks like EJ! How cute!!!!

2:05 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

You guys shouldn't have an issue with the uncle/niece thingie. Max was adopted, he is NOT her uncle by birth, only on paper. Let the two of them do what they feel is necessary, share strong feelings..LOL

3:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Loved the Steph/Max pic. I can't stand that relationship. He might be adopted, but he's still part of the family.

4:51 PM  
Blogger Deb said...

Mike: Actually since Max was legally adopted by OMB and Caroline Brady, that makes him LEGALLY their son.

They would even have a birth certificate listing them as parents.

So that would make a relationship with either Stephanie or Chelsea illegal in the eyes of the law.

5:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank GAWD - EJ and Sami are back. The show is finally interesting again and we get snarky clever EJ and witty, give as good as you get Sami. I love it!

7:16 PM  
Anonymous Cindyjh said...

Thanks for the great laugh this morning. Between classic Shelle and Friday's episode, I was rolling on the floor!

7:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want Lucas back, I hope EJ and Nicole hook up. MAx and Stephanie are gross. I want chels to stay with Nick. Hope can stay kipnapped for all I care. I wanted Belle to leave with Phillip and shawn to stay. I miss Billie. Why do I watch this show. Nothing goes my way.

2:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonderful Episode SO GLAD SAMI and EJ are back on. The show if boring without them. The humour today was so entertaining.
Obviously I love them! The rest of the epi is great too. Not hating Ava quite as much.
SO enjoying the break from mr. constipated face Lucas.

7:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow! My sister just turned me on to your blog .... thank you. Can't wait to dive in.

5:29 PM  

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