Prevuze II

Sorry, gang, there was no feed today because of a golf match that will be on TV the entire afternoon on Labor Day. So we thought this would be a good day to tell you about that "II" graphic that has appeared on Prevuze recently.

Idle hands are the Devil's playground, they say, and although Prevuze hasn't had much idle time lately, that l'il devil has been busy in the playground. We've been toying with this idea for some time and finally decided to jump in and go with the technology available to bring you a better Prevuze experience.

The original concept of Prevuze was to email the feed's next day previews to a small group just to give people a sneak peek at what was coming down the pike. In fact, that's where the name came from. Since we always referred to "Days" as "Daze," it was only natural that the "previews" we were sending incorporate the same "ze" ending and it became "Prevuze."

That concept grew until we started including show bits, more show bits, the whole show, silly pictures and the next thing we knew, we were on the web.

So now, we've come up with a brand new website, Prevuze II, that takes us back to that original concept – just the previews. Think of it as an "executive summary."

What we will do is, after Prevuze is up for the day, post a very short summary of what happened in the show on Prevuze II. The only thing that will change on the original Prevuze is we will no longer include the episode's previews, but will post them on Prevuze II, where you can WATCH them.

All of the comments on Prevuze II will link back to the original Prevuze so we don't have to manage two comments boards. Other than that, we will keep Prevuze II short and sweet.

Prevuze II will be posted later than the original. We aren't sure how long it will take to get everything moved up, but it always should be finished by late morning, US EST. At least for the first few posts, we'll make an announcement with a link on the original Prevuze site when Prevuze II is up.

We sincerely hope you find it to be an improvement. Please let us know what you think.

In the meantime, here's a sample of what you will get beginning this coming Monday:

Ladies and Gentlemen! Announcing...

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PREVUZE II

FBBDN

Belle and Phillip are in the pub going over plans for their trip. Belle tells Phillip she's not sure she can help. Phillip thinks the women at the shelter will trust Belle more than Phillip. Most people would trust Sauron more than Phillip. Belle goes through her story, "I'm Lauren's sister and I'm really worried about her – Man, that's a lot to remember."

Claire is at day care but Belle told them she will pick her up by six. She didn't tell Shawn.

Shawn goes through his box of tools. Hope can't believe the garage is going belly up. Shawn hopes Max doesn't go to jail. He doesn't know what is next for himself, though. He'll have to find a new job. Hope asks how Belle feels about it. Shawn hesitates, and Hope calls him on it.

Kayla comes out with Pocket as Patch is on the phone with Bo plotting against Andre. He chastises Kayla for dressing Pocket like a girl. Kayla wants to know why Steve has to be a part of the plot,
"We have this pocket full of miracles to think about." She heads for the hospital, but wants to leave Pocket with Patch.

Belle joins Phillip at a table. Belle says she thought she would tell Shawn at the last minute so they would have less time to argue. Phillip thanks her for going. "Friends show up for friends," says Belle. Phillip says it's been a lonely ride for him. Belle tells him he's not alone as long as she is around.

Hope and Shawn argue about whether he should tell Belle about losing his job. He says he's been thinking. Stand back, everybody. Maybe he will join the Salem PD.

Hope's smile fades, "At least you're qualified, since you are one of the dumbest guys in town." She doesn't think Belle will be thrilled. In fact, Hope isn't thrilled. She has already lost one six year old, and doesn't want to lose another.

Kayla thinks Patch passed basic baby training so she can leave pocket with him, "You know the the goochy goos and belly blows."

"I love it when you get kinky," says Patch.

Kayla says, "It comes down to FBBDN." Patch is confused. Kayla fills him in, "Feeding, burping, bath time, diaper change and nap. And not necessarily in that order." She assures him he can do it. Patch agrees. She over-instructs him. Patch tells her he's got it. He says everything will be cool. Nervous Kayla leaves.

Patch turns and contemplates his responsibility. He tells pocket, "We don't need any girly girls around. How much trouble could ten pounds of baby be?" He holds out a finger, "Gimme one."

"WWWAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Patch does his best.

Dr. Kayla comes in as Lexie sits with Benjy. Lexie wishes it were she instead. They play the blame game. "I want the best care for Benjy," says Lexie, "but we'll settle for you." Kayla says she will use Lexie's expertise and they can work together. Benjy might survive anyway.

Pocket rages. Steve tries everything... Dancing, singing, bootie puppets. He leans in for a closer look to see how Pocket is responding.

HURL!. Patch stares through the mess.

Hope warns Shawn about police work. He says when he breaks the news to Belle about losing his job, he wants to top it with something great. Hope tells him the possibility of danger is there all the time, "The donut shop production line could fail at any moment."

"Police work can't be as terrifying as living with Belle," says Shawn.

Hope is convinced he's not going to back down. She remembers all the dangerous things Shawn has done, "When you went to kindergarten... when you finally made it to first grade five years later... when you got your drivers' license... no living room or church in Salem was safe." She will just pray things work out. Shawn wants to apply to the academy before Phillip swoops in on Belle. Hope insists Belle is loyal to Shawn, "Phillip can't compete with you. He doesn't have a leg to stand on." She encourages Shawn to tell Belle tonight. He says he will.

Phillip and Belle make eyes at each other. She says she should go over to Bo and Hope's house and let them know what's going on today. He says he will pick her up in 45 minutes, "I mean it Belle, you're the best." She leaves.

Belle knocks. Shawn answers. Smooch. Shawn tells Belle he's taking her out to dinner tonight. "What's the occasion," asks Belle.

Shawn says, "Just to talk about dreams, plans and all the Days Of Our Lives." Belle suggests another night. She tells him about the Tulsa trip.

Hope knocks. Steve answers the door and thanks her for getting there so fast. He says he doesn't know what's wrong.

"Poopy diaper," asks Hope.

"No," says Patch, "I'm clean."

"Did you burp him after his last bottle," she asks.

"Bottle?"

"Steve," says Hope, "He's hungry." Patch goes for the bottle. He decides to get something for the baby while he's at it.

Kayla tells Lexie about leaving the baby with Patch. Lexie remembers leaving Isaac with Abe the first time. She hid outside and watched through the window. Kayla thinks it must have been difficult to lose Isaac. "Not as tough as having him die," says Lexie. She assures Kayla things will work out with Patch and Pocket.

Lexie says Benjy thinks Steve was a great daddy. Benjy still talks about the night they took him in. It was on their honeymoon and Benjy said it was the first time he ever felt safe, "It was Steve who made him feel that way."


Belle and Shawn talk about Tulsa. He asks why she has to go, "What about Billie, Kate Chelsea, why does it have to be you?"

Kayla talks about the new cocktail of antibiotics that might work for Benjy. Benjy's BP is up and so is his heart rate. Lexie doesn't know if he has the strength to pull through.

Kayla says they won't let Benjy die while the evil Stefano DiMera lies recovering in the next room, "He's rebuilding himself body part by body part, just like a Frankenstein. I couldn't pull the plug in Tuscany but if, God forbid, Benjy doesn't make it, I promise you Stefano will be next. I want to kill. I mean, I wanna, I wanna kill. Kill! I wanna, I wanna see, I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead burnt bodies. I mean kill, Kill, KILL, KILL!" She starts jumpin' up and down yelling, "KILL, KILL," and Arlo Guthrie comes out and starts jumpin up and down with her and they both jump up and down yelling, "KILL, KILL!"

And Arlo pins a medal on her, sits her down and says, "You're our girl.""

Lexie feels the same way, even though Stefano is her father. Stefano has taken so much from all of them. Kayla says he has taken a lot from Steve and Steve is just starting to get back into life. She wants that to last.

Pocket is quiet. Steve apologizes for messing up with his bottle. Hope asks about Pocket's real identity. Steve says they don't know and he doesn't think Kayla is in a mood to find out. They decide Pocket will need a regular name when he grows up. Patch suggests the ever-so-regular names of Sonny or Wolf. He tells pocket he'll be leaving when they track down his real parents. "What if they don't," asks Hope, "Are you ready to take on parenthood again?"

"Parenthood," asks Patch, "Maybe. But I wasn't ready for you to ask me that question for the one thousandth time."

Lexie waits with Benjy. She says Kayla can go if she wants. Kayla says she is staying to see how the antibiotics work. She wonders how Lexie is doing. Kayla suggests she go snooze in her office. Lexie refuses to leave Benjy's side. Kayla thinks Lexie is afraid Andre will come and finish Benjy off if she leaves. "Santo's demand for revenge has destroyed all our lives," says Lexie, "I'm terrified for Theo – he has DiMera blood, too."

Benjy bats his eyes. The girls gasp.

Patch pours a drink. Hope asks if it felt good holding pocket. "Don't give me crap," snorts Patch, "You really think I'm cut out for this daddy gig?"

"One hundred per cent," says Hope, "Look at Benjy."

"That was before the brain trouble," says Patch.

Hope insists the old Steve is still there. He says, "When Pocket started crying, my first instinct was to dial 911, but the wailing was so loud I couldn't remember the number. If this was a test today I flunked."

"Hardly," says Hope, "It was like watching you with Stephanie all over again. I think you know a lot more than you give yourself credit for."

"Now I remember why I always called you sweet thing," says Patch, "Thanks, pal." He spreads his arms, "Ladies and gentlemen my first solo!" Hope helps him clean up.

Belle thinks if Phillip finds his son he'll be less interested in Claire. Shawn wants that in writing. Shawn tells her to be careful on the trip. Phillip knocks at the door and Shawn answers, "You here to pick up your flight buddy?"

"Is that a problem?"

Belle swoops in and answers for him, "No." Shawn also says it's not. Belle goes to make a call.

Shawn tells Phillip he knows what is going on, "What you're trying to do is move in on Belle and take her away from me, SO WHAT'S TAKING YOU SO LONG? "

The girls rejoice. Benjy doesn't remember what happened. Lexie fills him in. Andre didn't use sterilized instruments, but the antibiotics are working. Kayla will make calls to tell people Benjy is better. She tells him about Pocket, "Steve is the greatest dad in the world." Fatherhood has taken a real nosedive.

Shawn and Phillip argue about Phillip's motives. Shawn says this is the last time he will stand by while something like this happens. Belle rushes back. "Dinner is at six," says Shawn. Belle leaves.

Phillip gets nasty, "The last time I looked, Belle is a free woman. She's not your wife, not yet." He leaves. Shawn flashes his teeth Bo-style.

Kayla comes up to the door and prays they survived. She walks in and gives Steve the news on Benjy. Steve thinks he pulled through because of her. He tells her Pocket is asleep. Kayla is a bit surprised everything went OK, "What did you do with my husband?"

"That good-looking one eyed dude," asks Patch, "He's right here."

Kayla is impressed. "Wait till you see my second act," says Steve. Smooch. She says he's made her happy and is going the extra mile to be a good daddy. Now more than ever she wants them to raise a child together. She thinks one reason he came back was to be a daddy, "I'm going to go check on Pocket and then you can try to impress me all you want." Steve sighs.

Hope comes back. She senses something is wrong. Shawn tells her about the trip, "Phillip conned her into going. He thinks he's going to turn it into a romantic interlude." Hope asks if Shawn trusts Belle. He says he does.

"Then, whoosh," says Hope, "The doubts are all gone." FF Shawn.



Previews
========

Kayla says, "I could kill him in cold blood because of what he did to you. Patch says, "You know what, baby, that's the thing. There's the motive. I've got more reason to kill him than anybody."

Bo says, "I need Stefano here, in the hospital. Can you help me?" Tony asks, "Why?" Bo says, "I'm gonna kill him."

Stefano says, "I want you, Tony, to carry on the DiMera legacy." Tony says, "It would be an honor, Father."

Those Three Little Words I Long For – "The Patient Died"

Phillip chortles over having a son, "Tyler Kiriakis... I still can't wrap my head around it." Billie searches the Internet as she sits at a table in the pub with him. She gets a hit on Lauren at a shelter for battered women in Oklahoma. That's the great thing about safe houses – they just toss all their information up on the Internet. It especially makes it easy for the raging husbands of battered women to find their wives. "Did she have a kid with her," asks Phillip.

"I don't know," says Billie, "Those women are scared and don't talk to cops. Besides, it says by the time the cops got there, she was gone." She gives him the address, but says she can't go with him to check it out. The university needs her, "I'm teaching a course on the economics of prostitution at the business school, HO-101."

Billie says she thinks he should go with a woman, however – posing as Lauren's concerned sister.

Shawn and Belle are at Bo and Hope's house. Shawn is there to look for his tools. Belle asks Shawn if he's had any luck as he walks into the living room. He says he found a few wrenches but maybe the rest of the tools are in the garage.

"That would be a strange place to keep tools," says Belle. She thinks he has to use his own tools on the job instead of Max'. She gets frisky and says she wants him to model his tool belt for her wearing nothing else. Gee, Shawn thinks that's a good idea. "You keep looking," says Belle, "While I go call Mom and Dad and see how Claire is doing over there with them."

"Claire who," asks Shawn.

As Belle leaves the room, Shawn answers a knock at the door. It's Max. Shawn tells Max his folks aren't there – he just stopped by to pick up his tools. Max tells him his mom told him Shawn was there. He says they are both going to be out of work. He's going to lose the garage.

Lucas pounds at the steam room door and rages. Sami yells through the door and tells him EJ isn't breathing. That's because she's taking up all the air in the room with her huffing, puffing and bawling. Lucas goes to get something to cut the chain.

Sami begs EJ not to die on her. She gives him mouth-to-mouth.

Bo reminds Steve he said he wouldn't freak on him. "This isn't freaking," freaks Patch. He says he's going to take the liver and give it back to Benjy. After that, Bo can arrest him if he wants to.

Phillip thinks Billie's scheme is a good one. Billie suggests he take Belle. Phillip remembers Belle-zebub raging at Shawn for always calling the shots. Phillip says Billie is right, "I doubt Shawn would let her go."

Shawn guesses the Touch The Sky side deal Max was involved in wasn't legal. Max flashes back to Jeremy's confession that he's smuggling women. Max tells Shawn he thought what they were doing was just a little over the edge. He doesn't want to tell Shawn what's going on. All he will say is its' really bad. He has one more flight left, and that's it.

Shawn wants to talk to Bo about it. Max reminds him Vegas is out of Bo's jurisdiction. Shawn assures him Bo can screw things up no matter which jurisdiction he's in. Max says he won't be able to live with himself if something bad happens to the girls, "My share of this came from mortgaging the garage and I'm going to lose it. You can bet on it. Max' garage is going down the tubes."

A doctor walks up and sees Patch cradling the cooler. He asks if that is the donor liver section. Patch says, "There was no donor involved. The guy they ripped it from is in surgery fighting for his life and he needs it back."

"Do you have a warrant," asks the doctor.

"A what," asks Bo. He turns and tells Patch they have no legal recourse and asks for him to hand over the cooler.

"I can't do that," says Patch.

Sami tries to resuscitate EJ, "Don't you dare die on me, EJ!"

Lucas pries at the door with a crowbar. The mouth-to-mouth develops into something else. Sami gets into it and then backs off, "OMG! Did that just happen? I think I'm oxygen deprived."

Lucas finally gets the chain loose and breaks into the face sucking episode, "Sami?" He pulls her off. Sami says EJ was electrocuted trying to get them out, "You have to give him CPR, Lucas!" Lucas turns green and stares at EJ.

Bo insists Patch give up the liver. "He's Stefano's son for God's sake," gasps Patch, "What do you want to do? Give him this liver so he can live a couple more months and then go to hell anyway? I say we send him now!"

Bo says he will add what happened to Benjy to the charges against Andre. Patch argues. Rolf insists Bo arrest him. Patch whirls around and grabs a bottle of bleach from a maid's cart. He holds the open bottle above the open cooler and threatens to pour it in.

Billie tries to convince Phillip to ask Belle to go. Phillip thinks this is like chasing Shawn, Belle and Claire around the South Pacific all over again. Billie tells him to move on this even if it puts him at the top of Shawn's blacklist.

Belle walks into the living room and finds Max. She asks what's up. Max puts his mouth in gear but Shawn stands behind Belle slicing his hand across his throat. Max shuts up, which gives Belle an opportunity to listen to her favorite sound – her own voice. "I know," she squeals, "You're gonna make Shawn a full partner!"

Max says, "Oh, I already consider Shawn to be a full partner."

Belle brings out her giddy schoolgirl personality, "Ooooo, so you're going franchise!" Max tells her he just got a new diagnostic system at the garage, and that was the good news. Belle's smile melts. She tells Shawn she has to go to the bookstore and pick up the books for the nursing classes she will never attend. Shawn says he will meet her at the pub later. Belle asks for cash. Shawn takes out a wad and hands her some. The giddy schoolgirl has returned. She grabs the rest of it from his hand, "You were right about moving over the pub. It feels good not to depend on someone else." She leaves.

Max smile fades. He apologies for interrupting. Shawn says no apology is necessary. Max tells him to tell Belle the truth before she finds out on her own.

Bo takes Patch by surprise and gets him in a chokehold. They wheel Stefano to the OR.

As Steve struggles Bo asks, "Are you gonna act like a rational human being?"

"Looks like I'm the only one who is," says Patch. The chokehold gets tighter as Bo tells him to slow down. He releases him.

Patch rages, "If you weren't such a damn coward, you'd do the right thing – Have me committed and throw away the key."

Lucas wretches at the thought of giving EJ mouth-to-mouth. Sami starts to do it herself. That gets Lucas' butt in gear. He slaps EJ's face and tells him to wake up. Sami says, "He needs CPR!" Lucas holds his nose and dives in.

Belle goes into the pub carrying a loaded book bag and finds Phillip. She tells him she's excited about college. She says she got his text message. He tells her about the pending trip to Tulsa and asks her to go, "They won't talk to a man in those safehouses."

"Oh," says Belle, "In that case, I'd better make sure none of my male personalities come out."

Patch wants to know what's happened to Bo. Bo insists they have to pick their battles. He didn't want to have to haul Steve in, but reminds him there are rules. Patch says they have to start making their own rules, "Fight fire with fire."

"I'm a cop," says Bo.

Steve rants, "You're hung up on the rules and the DiMeras are calling the shots while the people we love are going down. If you're too chicken we might as well dig our own graves."

Lucas works on EJ. EJ chokes and wakes up. He thanks Lucas for saving his life. "I didn't have much choice. Now we're even – almost," says Lucas.

EJ hyperventilates, "The freezer truck... By the way, your lips are as soft as rose petals." He throws Lucas a kiss.

Lucas snorts, "Why don't you kiss my..." The paramedics interrupt. Lucas tells them, "Einstein here electrocuted himself."

Sami tells Lucas he did the right thing. He asks why he feels he just shot their whole future to hell.

"Sign me up," says Belle. She doesn't have a problem with going to Tulsa with Phillip.

The paramedics tell Lucas Sami has elevated BP and a low-grade fever, but the babies will be fine. They wheel EJ out. Lucas tells Sami another ambulance is coming for her. He also tells her about her BP and the fever. He's a little surprised when Sami doesn't resist going to the hospital, but she says she's worried about the babies. She asks him why he said that thing about blowing their future.

Lucas says EJ is a virus. Every time EJ shows up she gets chills and a fever. EJ wants Sami and she knows it. Sami assures him she loves him, "I want you and I want to be with you for all the Days Of Our Lives. You have nothing to worry about." Translation: Start worrying, Lucas.

Lucas says, "I know you want me to believe that, but I don't think you believe it yourself."

Bo says with the letters they'll find out how the vendetta started and once they have Andre and the folio, they will know how to end it.

Patch is sarcastic, "And the Bradys and DiMeras will hold hands and form a human chain of happiness." Patch says they have to get Stefano. Bo says he almost had to throw him in jail, "Steve Johnson with nothing but a cot and toilet. That'd show the DiMeras wouldn't it?"

Shawn sits outside with Max and talks about how tough life is. He says he gets the feeling he just can't catch a break.

Max says after they get the girls out the cops will swarm in and take everything. He might go to jail. Whatever happens he will deal with it. He will take his punishment.

"No matter how bad your punishment is," says Shawn, "At least you don't have to live with Belle."

Shawn reminds Max about the time he was a runner for EJ. He's been through this kind of thing. Shawn says he needs to be more like Max. He doesn't understand why he didn't just tell Belle about the garage going belly up in the first place, "I keep having this fear I can't seem to shake – that Shawn Brady isn't good enough for Belle Black. Just like every other guy."

Sami asks where that statement came from. She says she doesn't secretly think she's going to end up with EJ. Lucas reminds her about his joke at the pub when he said she and EJ seemed to be destined to be together. He thinks the idea of her and EJ scares her. He's sick of all this. He thinks she can't see it and it scares the hell out of him.

Bo continues to lecture Steve. Steve says action is the only thing that counts. He wants to know what they should do, just sit around and wait for the DiMeras to get them. Bo insists he will take care of it.

The doctor comes out. "Tell me those three little words I long for," says Steve, "The patient died."

"The Phoenix has risen again," says Rolf, "The operation was a success. You will never bring him down." Rolf leaves.

Patch sneers, "You hear that, Bo, they are laughing at us. Maybe you don't want to do anything but I'm going to." Bo tells him to hold on. He has an idea. He's not just going to bend the rules, he's going to make a pretzel out of them, "Are you interested?"

"Lay it on me," says Patch.

Phillip comes back inside the pub after making a phone call. He has arranged the Titan jet for tomorrow. With luck they will be back in Salem by tomorrow evening. Phillip is worried about Shawn, "He won't like this. Let me know if he gives you a hard time." She says Shawn will be working at the garage and won't even miss her.

"You are the best," says Phillip, "I don't know what I'd do without you." Hugs. Stares.

Max insists Shawn needs to get over it. He tells Shawn Belle loves him. Shawn says he needs a paycheck ASAP. Max encourages him to tell Belle about the garage going bust right now. Shawn twiddles his phone. He doesn't want to do it over the phone.

Max sighs, "You're not gonna tell her, are you?"

Sami insists EJ doesn't have magical powers over her. Lucas reminds her he walked in and found them liplocked. She asks if she should be jealous too, since he was just liplocked with EJ himself, "He didn't lock me up to cop a feel. I should smack you for being such a jackass. The destiny I believe in starts with a teenage troublemaker who got to take a military brat to her first dance. He turned out to be the love of her life. Get it?"

Lucas gets it. There is a first time for everything. She hands him back his wedding ring and he puts it on as they walk off.

Patch says Bo's plan had better include stomping on Andre. Bo says Andre is their number one target. They will set a trap he can't resist walking into, "We off the old man."

"Are you serious," asks Patch.

"Not a real killing," says Bo, "We fake the whole thing. It will be front-page news and Andre will show up for revenge." They walk off and Patch apologizes for some of the stuff he said.

Bo says he has to pass this by Roman, Abe and probably internal affairs. "Let's get'er done," says Patch the cable guy.

Meanwhile, back at Bo and Hope's house, Shawn stands nekkid as a jaybird except for his tool belt wondering where Belle is...


Previews
========


Kayla tells Lexie, "If, God forbid, Benjy doesn't make it, I promise you Stefano will be next."

Hope asks, "Are you ready to take on parenthood again?" Patch holds Pocket and stares.

Shawn tells Phillip, "What you're trying to do is move in on Belle and take her away from me, and you're going to use every trick in the book to do it."

I Back Your Got

Kayla frets about Benjy. Steve deflects her questions as he inspects Benjy's suitcase. BLOOD! Kayla hyperventilates. Steve comforts her and promises they will find him.

A homeless man pushes his shopping cart down an alley. He looks into a dumpster and exclaims, "Wowza! And I thought I had it bad." We pan down to see Benjy lying there right next to a pile of DOOL scripts for the next month – and you wondered where they get this stuff; now you know.

Stefano pants and tells Rolf to listen. He wants a favor – he asks Rolf to destroy the folio. Rolf gets a call and has to leave immediately. Stefano objects, but Rolf tells him this call will make Stefano happy. Stefano huffs.

Santo returns. Stefano asks if he has come for him. Santo says no. Stefano says he doesn't know how long he can hang on. Rolf comes back with news that they have found a donor. Stefano doesn't understand how. Rolf says, "With a little help from that remarkable nephew of yours."

Sami and EJ pound and scream. Andre chortles. As he leaves, he wonders, "Where the hell is Kate?"

Inside, the pounding continues. Sami bawls. EJ says Bo will probably be there soon and they will get out.

Out in the alley, Fido barks as Lucas is on the phone with Bo. He begs him to find Sami. Bo tells him Sami already left the health club. Bo wonders why Lucas doesn't just break a window to get out of the car. I mean, if you're locked in a car, that's how you get out, right? Lucas asks, "Did you ever see Cujo?" He asks if Sami left with someone. Bo beats around the bush, but finally tells Lucas Sami left with EJ. If that's the case, Lucas thinks she was forced to leave with him.

Roman is looped. Bo gets off the phone and tells him to stay there. Roman protests, "No, no, Bo. I fine. I back your got." Bo doesn't think it's a good idea for Roman to go with him. Roman says, "Bo, I'm giving you an odor. I'm the commish-shiner." Bo gives up. He and Roman leave as Andre sneaks out.

Rolf tells the doctor they found a donor so the operation must take place as scheduled. The doctor leaves to prepare. Rolf assures Stefano he won't let anything happen to him. He turns to look at Stefano's machines.

Stefano tells Santo to go away. Rolf looks around to see whom he is talking to.

Patch asks, "How could I be so stupid?"

"You always seem to find many creative ways," says Kayla, "But this time it isn't your fault." Steve heads out on his mission. Kayla wants to go and we go through the standard, tedious, "I want to go," – "No you can't go" argument we always do. Steve leaves without her.

Lucas sets off the car alarm as Fido barks. The alarm scares Fido and his companion and they run off just as Bo and Roman arrive. Lucas gets out of the car and pops the hood to shut off the alarm. Roman is giddy. Bo tells Lucas about Roman and the hypo full of lollipops. He asks Lucas if he is OK. Lucas insists he is fine. The blood dripping from his head is just for show. Bo gets a call. It's Hope. She tells him Benjy is missing. Bo says he will be there in ten minutes. I guess he thinks he's going to find Benjy in the crawl space under his house.

Lucas stops Bo. He thought they were going to look for Sami. Roman vows to step in and help. Lucas decides a stoned Salem cop is better than a sober one, so he let's Bo go. Roman slaps Lucas on the back, "We got it covered!"

Sami steams. Literally. EJ takes his clothes off and suggests Sami do the same. He hands her a towel and turns around.

Stefano tells Santo this is his fault. Rolf insists there is no one there. Stefano ignores him and says he is in this mess because of Santo's obsession. He tells him to go away. Rolf tries to calm him down. Stefano tells Rolf the folio has to be destroyed, "Nobody must ever know how this vendetta ends."

"I'm betting the writers don't know," says Rolf.

"The secret must die with me," says Stefano. Rolf promises he will destroy the folio.

EJ struts around the sauna in his boxers. He asks Sami how she feels.

"Dizzy," says Sami.

"Good," says EJ, "Things are still normal." Sami wonders if God would let the babies die. EJ doesn't think so. Sami bawls. She says Lucas wanted to get her out of there and she didn't listen. She panics and pounds on the door. EJ tries to calm her down. Sami worries that Andre has done something to Lucas. EJ says, "Andre wouldn't kill someone in a public place."

Sami goes over the top, "What do you think this is?"

Bo arrives back at his house. Apparently no one can find Benjy. Bo tells Hope about Lucas. He's OK, but they couldn't find Sami.

Kayla gets off the phone and reports Tony hasn't heard from Benjy either, "I just don't know what will happen to Steve if something happens to Benjy."

Steve arrives. He says he didn't find anything. He holds a bag behind his back, which Kayla immediately zones in on. He tries to keep it from her, but she grabs it and opens it. "OMG! OMG!" She holds up Benjy's bloody shirt, "It's going to take a double dose of enzyme treatment to get that out."

Sami sweats. She says she's having trouble breathing. EJ tries to encourage her. Sami wonders where Bo is and then heads into full-blown panic and blubbering, "It is 400 degrees in here! I can't breathe! If you tell me to relax one more time I swear I will kill you!"

Roman seems to be coming back from his trip through Itchykoo Park. He and Lucas go into Stefano's room, see all the activity and wonder what's going on. Rolf announces Stefano is about to go into surgery. Roman wants to know who donated the liver. Rolf says another family member stepped forward. He asks them to leave.

Lucas pulls Roman aside, "Who besides EJ would donate a liver?"

Roman says, "Maybe that liver wasn't donated at all. Maybe it was stolen!" Dumb-da-dumb-dumb!

Steve says he found the shirt down by the docks.

Bo gets off the phone and announces a homeless guy found Benjy in a dumpster down by the river wrapped in a bloody sheet. Bo heads for the river. We have the same dumb argument about who should go and who should stay, only this time between Bo and Patch. Steve asks, "You don't trust me, do you?"

Everyone trusts Steve to go off the deep end, but Bo says he doesn't trust him knowing how he feels about Benjy.

Patch is peeved. Bo tells him he trusts him with his life but not when it comes to Benjy. Bo knows how Patch gets when it comes to people he cares about. He says he doesn't need a vigilante tearing up the streets. Hope comes up and tells Bo Steve will follow him anyway, whether he lets him go or not. Bo turns and tells Patch he can go, but if he loses it he will lock him up. Patch understands. Understanding is one thing, acting like an adult is a whole different ballgame.

They leave. Hope tells Kayla it's better that Steve is with Bo. Kayla agrees. She talks about how hard it was to deprogram him and she doesn't want to have to go through that again.

Lucas leaves a message for Sami. He tells Roman he thinks she still has to be at the gym. Roman heads for the waterfront while Lucas heads for the health club.

Sami wants EJ just to shut up. "You weren't kidding about those hormones, were you," says EJ. He suggests a game. Twenty questions. Sami doesn't want her last minutes on earth spent playing twenty questions, so EJ suggests truth or dare.

Sami isn't thrilled about that either, "This is not a sixth grade slumber party!"

"We almost have the mentality of sixth graders, though," says EJ. He comes up with the first question, "Is that your natural hair color?"

And you thought the girl was steamed before, "EXCUSE ME?"

"I don't want to know anyway," says EJ.

"My turn," says Sami, "Truth – did you set this up? Are you working with Andre to get us stuck in here? You arranged all this to get me naked, didn't you?" EJ says if that were his intention, he could think of more comfortable places.

Sami thinks maybe he just wanted to be her savior. He swears he had nothing to do with this. She asks about finding Lucas on ice and wants to know if he had anything to do with that. He reminds her she showed him where the meat truck was, "I'm far too old to be a superhero."

"Maybe you just want to score points with me," says Sami.

"No," says EJ, "Just score. I very much care what happens to you."

Sami says, "If that's the case, help me get out of here. Help me save my babies' lives." She says Lucas won't be happy when he finds their naked bodies in there. EJ tells her to take it easy. He fans her with a towel. She says that helps. She offers to fan him, but he refuses. EJ looks up and sees a ceiling fan. He wonders if he could short-circuit it.

"What are you," asks EJ, "a C-cup, a D-cup?"

"I BEG YOUR PARDON!"

He takes her bra and fishes a wire out of it.

Meanwhile, outside, Tessa tells Lucas the gym is closed. Lucas asks about Sami and EJ. Tessa says they left, but Lucas thinks they are still there.

Patch comforts Benjy, "Stay with us." The paramedics wheel him off. Bo informs Patch he has a deep, surgical laceration under his ribs. Patch goes to ride with Benjy.

Bo tells a cop to get a statement from the homeless guy. Roman comes up and tells Bo Stefano somehow got a liver. "Dammit," says Bo.

Stefano tells Santo to go away. Rolf thinks Stefano is talking to him. "Not you Rolf," says Stefano, "him." Rolf wonders what is in the medication.

Santo tells Stefano, "You have-a been a faithful-a soldier. Your work-a here iss not done-a."

"What do you want," asks Stefano.

"Whatever you have left-a." Santo dematerializes.

Rolf asks if Stefano is comfortable. Stefano, says, "The Phoenix will never die! HAHAHAHAHA!"

Kayla thinks they should have heard form the guys by now. Hope insists Benjy will be fine. She thinks Kayla needs to stop being so crazy over Steve. She wonders if Kayla is having doubts.

"Let's call it concern," says Kayla. She's afraid he's going to slip back into his old ways.

"Just when did he ever slip out of them," asks Hope.

"I'm going to live in fear of that for all the Days Of Our Lives," says Kayla, "I thought pocket would give him a sense of purpose, but really I'd settle for any sense at all."

"What if he slips anyway," asks Hope. Kayla stares.

Bo thinks the liver came from Benjy. He heads for the hospital to make sure the transplant doesn't happen.

EJ removes the wire. "You're getting off on touching my unmentionables, aren't you," asks Sami.

"It's a brassiere," says EJ, "You can say the word. When did you become such a prude? When we get out of here I'll take you shopping and by you a new one. A nice red lacy one – For Lucas, obviously."
EJ stands up to work on the fan. Sami says she is scared to death.

Hope apologizes for asking the question. Kayla says it has crossed her mind – what she would do if she lost Steve again. She vows it will not happen. She refuses to live her life wondering if the old Steve is here to stay. She wants to focus on the miracle that they are back together again, "I want to concentrate on the future because that's all we have." We rewound the tape to make sure but, yes, she really said that.

Bo stops Rolf on the way to the OR. He picks up the cooler at the end of the gurney, "Where did you find the liver so quickly?" Rolf claims a distant relative from Italy donated it.

Bo wonders how it got here in such a short time. He thinks it must be a coincidence about Benjy's misfortune.

Crazy man Patch storms in and grabs the cooler. Bo tells Patch to cool down. Patch conjures up his homicidal maniac personality, "This transplant's a bust! I'm not gonna cool down! There is no way I'm letting that bastard get this! I will flush it first! You hear me? No way!"

EJ works on the ceiling fan. Sami knows the end is near. She prays.

ZAP!

EJ falls like a sack of potatoes. Sami runs to him, cradles his head in her lap and blubbers, "EJ! Wake up! OMG!"

Lucas gets to the door, "Sami, Are you in there?"

Sami screams, "Lucas! Please hurry! I think EJ is dead!"


Previews
========

Shawn tells Max, "I keep having this fear I can't seem to shake – that Shawn Brady isn't good enough for Belle Black."

Belle says, "I told you that I would do whatever I could to help you find your son. I meant that." Phillip takes her hand, "You're amazing, you know that? But what about Shawn? I don't think he's gonna let you go."

Patch rages at Bo, "If you weren't such a damn coward, you'd do the right thing."

A Bucket Of Chum

EJ and Roman argue as EJ prepares to spend the rest of his life in Chateau d'If for parking ticket violations. EJ asks if Roman has any idea of the consequences his family will face if Stefano dies. Roman continues to read EJ his rights as EJ snatches the hypodermic needle off the table in front of him and jabs Roman in the leg. Roman yells, "You SOB!" EJ runs out.

Bo tells Stefano he can't cheat death. Stefano says he doesn't fear death. Bo says he doesn't know if that is true since he heard Stefano was begging for a slice of liver to save his life. Stefano insists Elvis is proud to be the donor. Bo tells him his proud son is headed for jail, "End this ridiculous vendetta, or prepare for a warm welcome in hell."

Sami paces in the dark health club. Tessa comes in, tells her the place is closed and asks her to leave.

Lucas stops foxy Andre. Andre turns and points his gun, "You're going to make one ugly stain on the wall." Lucas gets a look at Andre's face and makes an ugly stain on the carpet instead. He demands the folio. Andre refuses.

Roman struggles and yanks the hypo out of his leg.

Stefano asks if Bo expects him to turn over Andre. Bo offers the deal – EJ for Andre. EJ walks in. Bo asks where Roman is. "I'll tell," says EJ, "but you let me be his donor."

"That's the wonderful thing about tables," says Stefano, "They often turn."

Bo sneers, "Yeah, don't they." He turns to EJ, "You have the right to remain silent..."

Patch gives the play by play as he and Hope race to see who can slap a diaper on a kid quicker. It looks like a tie, but they argue about who won. Kayla answers the door. Benjy says he's looking for Patch and Bo. Pocket rages as Patch and Benjy go outside. Hope takes Ciara upstairs.

Outside, Benjy tells Patch Stefano is dying and that means his own life is in danger.

Roman continues to struggle, "I gotta get to Stefano."

EJ says if Bo takes him to jail, it will kill his father. Roman rushes up. While Roman and Bo are distracted, EJ goes over and asks Stefano to give them Andre. "Never," says Stefano. Bo overhears and says in that case EJ goes to jail. Stefano asks to be taken to his room. Rolf wheels him back.

Sami tells Tessa her husband followed a woman into the steam room.

"So get marriage counseling, honey," says Tessa, "Let's see your membership card."

Sami tells her she is Mrs. Roberts. Tessa's eyes widen, "You're Mrs. Roberts?" Sami doesn't have a membership card, so Tessa goes to look up her file on the computer. Sami rushes to the steam room door.

Lucas demands the folio. He doesn't think Andre will use the gun on him.

"There is more than one way to use a gun," says Andre. WHAP! "When a lady says no, she means no." Lucas lies in a heap on the floor and Andre kicks him for good measure.

Apparently Lucas thinks Andre hasn't had enough. He eggs him on, "Go ahead and kill me. Bo and Roman will hunt you down."

"You're bait boy," sneers Andre, "A bucket of chum. Get up!" Lucas refuses. Andre whacks him again.

Lucas rants, "You can't beat the Bradys.

Andre says, "You are nothing but a pawn. Now it's time to die like a man."

Bo tells EJ, "Stefano just chose protecting Andre over keeping you out of jail." EJ says the only reason Andre is showing any restraint is because of Stefano. He asks for five minutes to convince Stefano to give Andre up. Bo gives him two minutes. EJ rushes for Stefano's room.

Meanwhile, Roman is in a pretty good mood, "Hey... I want to know. Bo... is that short for Boseph?" He plays some air guitar.

Stefano tells EJ to go away. EJ lectures, "I am your son. So lets stop playing games, shall we, or I walk out this door right now."

Stefano says, "Just leave your liver when you go."

Hope comes back downstairs. Patch tells her and Kayla what Benjy said to him about the liver donation. Hope goes to call Lexie. Kayla is proud of Benjy, "It took courage to stand up to Stefano." She says Benjy can stay with them as long as he wants to. Patch thinks they have to get Benjy's car off the street, since Stefano and Andre know what it looks like. Benjy thanks them. Kayla says, "You don't have to thank us. Were family."

EJ wants to know why Stefano is protecting Andre. "Because he is my nephew," snorts Stefano, "Get out."

EJ says he is doing this because he loves Stefano, "All you have to do is..."

Stefano interrupts, "Betray Andre."

EJ says all of them are fed up with having their lives twisted by revenge. Stefano says he is just doing what his father asked him to do.

"And what was that," asks EJ.

"Keep-a the vendetta going-a. "

EJ says Andre will just keep destroying people for fun, "He did it when he killed Renee." He asks why Stefano would protect Andre after he did that, "Do it for Renee. Don't let her death amount to nothing."

Bo comes in and says time's up. He halls EJ off. Bo is too smart to give EJ any more time to convince Stefano to do what Bo wants him to do.

Stefano is moved by the thought of Renee. He tells Bo to stop, "Andre is meeting Kate at the health club where he will give her the key that ends the vendetta." Bo lets EJ go. EJ walks over and kisses Stefano on the forehead. He asks Bo to take the cuffs off and he will help end this without violence.

We hear Sami shouting in the distance as Andre drags Lucas off. Sami searches. She finds blood on the wall, "OMG! It's Lucas' blood!" She finds his wedding ring, takes out her phone and calls Roman.

Roman answers and Sami blathers into the phone, "Daddy, we are at the health club. I found blood on the wall and Lucas' wedding ring. Please come and help!"

"Who is this," asks Roman.

Hope and Kayla watch Patch tending to Pocket. They cackle. Patch accuses them of cooking up baby plans, "I have a good nose for scheming women." Kayla asks if he likes having Pocket around.

It's all right.

Hope asks him to be more specific, "Why do you like having him around?"

Steve asks, "You mean besides the fact his name is so stupid it cracks me up every time I hear it? Let's see...I like it when he wraps his entire hand around my finger. It's a riot. I till him to pull my finger and he does and then I... you know. And I like it when he falls asleep on my chest, so we can finally get some peace and quiet. All that grumbling I do is just trash talk." Kayla hugs him and tells him he will make a great father. Patch says, "Whatever makes ya happy, baby."

Hope interrupts and says Steve still hasn't answered her question. Steve asks, "And what is that question, Mariska Hargitay?

Hope asks, "Do you want to be a dad again? We need an honest answer."

"Then you should ask an honest guy," says the kidney thief.

Sami answers Roman's question, "It's me – Sami. I need your help."

Roman asks, "Does your mommy know you're on the phone? After you called Tokyo weather you're not supposed to be on the phone."

"That happened a long time ago," says Sami, "What happened to you?"

"EJ stuck me," says Roman, "I think it was with a needle filled with lollipops, hee, hee, hee. Bo is making me sit in this chair."

Do me a favor," says Sami, "Yell at Bo and tell him to come to the phone." Roman zones.

John Black walks up behind him, "Hey, old buddy, you got any more needles full of lollipops to share with a friend?"

Sami calls Bo and fills him in on what is going on at the health club.

EJ sits beside Roman. Sami tells Bo Lucas is in trouble. She tells him about the blood and wedding ring.

Stefano chuckles as Bo leaves. Bo finds Roman sitting alone and tells him they have to go, "Sami's in trouble."

Roman slurs, "With her mother?"

Tessa storms back into the gym, "Kate Roberts is a member of this club. You don't look like Kate Roberts picture on my computer."

Sami tells Tessa Lucas might be trapped in the steam room, "I'll have you know my uncle is a detective and my dad is the assistant police commissioner."

"And my dad is the tooth fairy," says Tessa. She hauls Sami out screaming.

Lucas lies beaten and bloody in the front seat of a car.

Opera music plays. Stefano says, "I know this aria. I remember this music."

"You should," says Santo, "It was the first opera I took you to."

Stefano looks up and about has a heart attack. He sobs and reaches for him, "Papa."

"No my son," says Santo.

Sami rants. Tessa says it's over. EJ rushes in. Sami tells him she can't find Lucas. EJ flashes his membership card at Tessa and tells her he is a member and Sami is her guest.

"It doesn't matter," says Tessa, "The club is closed." EJ tells Sami they have to go. He hauls her off as she protests. After they reach the door he goes back and gives Tessa his card, "If you ever want to go to corporate call me."

Tessa leaves as Sami and EJ head back toward the steam room.

Lucas sits in the car and struggles. His hands and feet are bound with duct tape, "I'm gonna kill Andre. Sami's in there with him."

Hope and Kayla badger Steve. He says he thinks life is unpredictable. He loves Stephanie, but still feels guilty for leaving Kayla. He wonders what is to stop the DiMeras from coming at them again. He has to protect what they have. Kayla bollixed up raising Stephanie because she was alone and he doesn't want to mess up another kid.

Pocket runs upstairs and starts packing his bags.

Kayla says it isn't his fault Stefano brainwashed him. Hope says she shouldn't have pressed. Suddenly, Steve remembers Benjy went out to move his car and runs out to look for him.

Stefano remembers the opera. He never took his eyes off the stage. Stefano remembers it was a revelation for him – he had no idea beauty could be so powerful. Santo remembers. Stefano asks if he is there to reclaim him. Santo says he never let him go. He was a good son. Stefano says he never doubted Santo's motives, but his mission has never been completed. He believes he has wasted the empire.

Santo claims he is the one who wasted it, "I was-a not a good-a match-a with your mother. Colleen she was-a the love of my life-a. When I couldn't have her, after the appropriate three day mourning-a period, that is, I wanted-a vengeance-a."

Stefano says he failed. Santo says he failed Stefano, Eet was my job-a as your father to protect-a your innocence-a. Instead I-a betrayed it. I started a war. I put-a you in the middle."

Stefano says sometimes he dreams and wakes up and thinks the world is like it was before the vendetta.

"I'm-a sorry," says Santo.

Stefano says he wasted half his life avenging Santo's heartbreak, "And now my children have abandoned me and I am dying alone. Sorry doesn't seem enough."

Santo says, "Ees not-a over. The Phoenix will-a arise again-a."

Lucas struggles and gets his duct tape handcuffs off. He frees his feet and starts to get out of the car. Outside a Doberman pinscher barks and slobbers. "Easy, big boy," says Lucas.

Sami wants to go with EJ. He wants her to stay there, "You know you can trust me."

"Yes," says Sami. She sits and waits as EJ heads into the steam room.

Bo arrives at the health club with Roman staggering behind. He shouts for Sami and Lucas. Tessa comes out and he tells her he is looking for Sami. Roman smiles and waves, "Hi! I'm the commish!"

"Ohmygosh," says Tessa, "It's true, then." Bo explains Roman is under the influence. Tessa says Sami left with a guy named Wells.

Sami knocks at the steam room door and yells, "EJ! Why are you taking so long? EJ!"

Andre slithers up behind her, "Does it have to be EJ, or will any DiMera do?"

Sami whirls, "Where is my husband? What have you done with him, you creep?"

Andre says, "I put him in the evil warehouse, told him to keep talking and the military is now using it for a wind tunnel. And you're going to be reunited with him very, very soon."


Hope assures Kayla Benjy will be fine. Steve comes back carrying a suitcase and Benjy's cap. Kayla rushes to him. Steve promises they will find Benjy.

Lucas judiciously decides to stay in the car. Being Lucas, he has a brilliant idea. He scoots over to the passenger side and starts to get out. Fido runs over and jumps up at the window, slobbers and barks. Gee, that didn't work. Outsmarted by a dog again.

Roman chuckles. Bo asks if Tessa knows where Sami and EJ went. She asks she doesn't. Bo gets a call. Lucas tells Bo he's trapped in a car in the alley behind the health club, "Andre played ping pong with my head."

"Who won," asks Bo.

Roman slurs in the background, "Hey, is that Lucas? Hiiiiii, Lucas!"

Lucas hears Roman, "Oh, great."

EJ starts to come out of the sauna. Instead, Andre shoves Sami in with him. He chains the door, cackles and turns up the heat.

Sami asks, "Is it warm in here or is it just me?"

Santo tells Stefano he isn't going to die. Santo is there to help Stefano fulfill his destiny. He tells him not to give up now.

As Santo leaves Stefano pleads, "What am I to do? Papa, come back!"

Rolf comes in and tries to give Stefano oxygen. Stefano huffs and puffs. He grabs Rolf, "Listen to me. The end is here. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Andre looks at the folio, "The end is near..."

Previews
========

EJ and Sami have removed several items of cumbersome clothing. EJ says, "I very much care what happens to you." Sami says, "Help me get out of here. Help me save my babies' lives."

Lucas asks, "Who besides EJ would donate a liver?" Roman says, "Maybe that liver wasn't donated at all."

Bo tells Patch to cool down. Patch holds a cooler and screams, "I'm not gonna cool down! There is no way I'm letting that bastard get this."

Frick, Frack And Poetry

We already had a Saturday Prevuze planned, but we just couldn't pass up these poems Deb put in the comments section...

Okay Prevuze faithful, time for morning prayer:

Hail Mary full of grace
Don't let us have to watch geezers suck face.
Shut Lucas up, calm Sami down,
And get the 90210 kids out of town.
Please let the letters finally be done.
And don't make us wait till sweeps for the last one.
Give Kayla some brains, and Belle get one too.
Or at least don't let them constantly whine like they do.
A BIG dose of macho is what all the men need.
And please God don't makes us watch John and Marlena do the deed.
Make the Brat PLEASE grow up, and Steph get a clue.
Let Jett and Jerkemy disappear from our view.
Finally the writers, OH GOD hear our prayer.
I think we are needing a miracle there.
Is an intelligent storyline too much to ask?
Or at least something just not so boring at last?
Hail Mary, Mother of God, pray for us viewers all the Days of Our Lives. Amen.


And now a poem:

There once was a couple called Lumi.
Who's future was so very gloomy.
While he had a mouth that wouldn't stay shut, she had always been called the town **** (fill in the rhyme).
Together and not, then wed once again.
Both throwing tantrums as if they were ten.
Sami freaks out and screams like she's mad.
Lucas just looks like a "before" Ex-Lax ad.
"I just want to be happy" Sami whines all day long.
"I don't believe you" is Lucas's song.
They bicker and argue and snipe all day long.
Both would just sooner drop dead then be wrong.
Every time they make whoopee, someone calls or walks in.
Here's a thought, lock the door BEFORE you begin!
OH Sami and Lucas, will you ever learn?
If you play with matches you'll always get burned.
Maybe someday you will, if either of you survives,
But know we'll be watching,

ALL THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES

A big thanks, Deb.

As far as the pictures at the right go, when Bo and Roman were standing together in EJ's room, the scene just shouted FRICK AND FRACK.

Then, all this Frickin' and Frackin' stuff brought a question to mind: Just who were Frick & Frack? So we looked it up. It turns out the original Frick & Frack were a pair of Swedish ice skaters, Werner Groebli and Hans Mauch. Frick took his name from a small village in Switzerland; Frack is a Swiss-German word for a frock coat, which Frack used to wear in the early days of their skating act. They put the words together as a joke.

So the pictures below are of either Frick or Frack or both. The problem is we don't know which frickin' one is Frick and which one is frickin' Frack.

You just never know what you're going to learn on Prevuze, do you?

Weekend Up!

Tiddlywinks

Max meets Jeremy at the pub. Jeremy asks where he has been. Max says, "Never drive by the senior center on bingo night. Traffic is a mess. I did see John, Marlena, Steve and Kayla headed in for a night of fun, though." Jeremy says he heard from Ilsa. She found all the girls, but it will take another day to round them all up. Max thinks that's great, "By the way, is one of them named Jenna? I have a score to settle."

Jeremy says all the girls will be at the hotel tomorrow night and Rawlings doesn't know about it. Jeremy has made arrangements for a flight tomorrow. After this is over they can chill. Max says they still need to go to the cops. Jeremy argues. Max assures him things will be cool. "Cool for you," says Jeremy, "And I'll end up in the Graybar Hotel." Max tells him to trust him on this. They have to get the girls out and safe.

Stephanie comes up and invites them to the beach with Jett and Chelsea. When he finds out Jett is outside, Jeremy bolts to talk to him.

Max and Stephanie share an uncomfortable moment. He thinks they should talk.

Jeremy rushes up to Jett like a runaway freight train, "We need to talk." Chelsea is confused that Jeremy, who seems to have an urgent situation on his hands, didn't stop to tip his hat and acknowledge Her Bratiness' presence. She gets all huffy and heads into the pub.

Jeremy asks Jett to talk to the cops and tell them he's trying to make things right.

Sami is in her street clothes pounding away on a treadmill. Lucas is on another machine dressed in his street clothes, too. Sami gripes and moans about only burning off five calories so far. Lucas, however, has burned off 100, because he's been talking all the time. He tells her to calm down. Sami gives up and gets off her machine. Lucas, sharpie that he is, decides they might look a little conspicuous in street clothes. He decides to go get some workout suits and tells her to keep her eyes peeled. Lucas leaves. Sami climbs into a weight machine as Andre comes in. Sami hides her face and sees that Andre is clutching the folio. He doesn't notice her because the gym is full of pregnant women in street clothes pumping iron.

Bo is outside his house making repairs. Roman comes up, "Well, aren't you the handyman. I have some gutters that need work when you're done."

"Just get your mind out of the gutter," says Bo.

Roman gets down to business. He thinks Andre knows Stefano is dying, and Stefano has ordered him to destroy the folio, then make himself scarce. As they go inside the fence railing Bo was working on collapses and takes the side of the house with it. Bo thought Stefano would be dead by now. He thinks Stefano is faking. Roman says he talked to one of Stefano's doctors, "I think this is for real. He can't live without a liver."

"He's lived this long without a heart," says Bo, "But as long as I've wanted that guy wiped off the face of this earth, him dying right now would be the worst thing that could happen to this family, unless Chelsea doesn't move out soon."

A Doctor asks EJ if he has any questions about the procedure. EJ doesn't. The doctor leaves. EJ broods. He thinks this is crazy. Rolf wheels Stefano in. Stefano says he rejoiced when the test came back and EJ was a match, "We are the same you and I."

"We've had our differences."

Stefano says words cannot express his gratitude. This bond warms his heart. Not to mention his liver. He says this must be done without a doubt on EJ's part. He must go into it will full assurance this is what he wants to do, and bravely, only as a DiMera can do. He asks if this is the way EJ is thinking. He wants to know if EJ is having doubts. EJ stares.

Chelsea comes into the pub and asks if she's interrupting. For the second time in a couple minutes, she gets a very cold reception, so she walks off. Max turns to Stephanie, "About the other night... I know things got a little out of control. I'm sorry if I crossed the line." Stephanie says it wasn't his fault. They argue about whose fault it was. Stephanie thinks they have a serious problem, "And his name is Jeremy."

Jett wonders why Jeremy thinks he has a hookup with the cops. Jeremy thinks the cops came to Jett. He tells Jett he doesn't want to go to jail. He's ready to name names and wants to come clean. Jett asks if the cops are onto him what makes him think it's not too late.

Andre leaves the workout room and goes into the juice bar. Lucas comes back with more appropriate clothes. Sami tells him about Andre. Lucas peeps into the juice bar and sees Andre has the folio, "What do we do now," asks Sami.

"You tell me," says Lucas.

Nick and Nora Charles they are not.

Stefano wants Elvis to tell him if he's having second thoughts. Elvis says he once worshiped Stefano. But he has come to see how many people he has hurt.

"What are you saying," asks Stefano.

"To put it in terms you will understand," says Elvis, "You ain't nothin' but a hound dog."

Stefano says he sensed some reluctance but he didn't think Elvis would deny life to the man who gave him life. He thinks EJ's moral superiority is a little hypocritical. Just a few days ago he was willing to put Lucas on ice for good. The cops think it was Andre but Stefano knows it was EJ.

EJ says he did it for the love of a woman. Stefano reminds him he is still a DiMera, "If you are unwilling to do this we will put a stop to it right now. Rolf! Tell the OR to call things off! Take the liver and Return To Sender."

Bo thinks Stefano is the only one who can control Andre. Roman gets a call, "OK, thanks. Keep me updated." He hangs up and tells Bo, "Your wish might just come true. EJ is about to donate part of his liver to Stefano. It might save Stefano's life."

Bo thinks the cards are falling into place and the Bradys will have the upper hand on the feud permanently. But he says they have to move now. They have to haul Elvis out of the hospital and Stefano will be high and dry unless he offers to end the vendetta. Roman is skeptical that it will work. Bo runs through the scenario and convinces Roman the plan will bring Stefano around.

Roman says, "I've been telling people for a long time you're not near as dumb as you look, and you almost had me convinced there."

Stefano rages. He would rather die at home rather than be in the company of someone he loves who has turned his back. EJ calls him back. He says he wants to rid himself of the DiMera curse. What he sees in Stefano terrifies him. Stefano says, "There is a saying. It is better to be feared than respected. Friends let you down every time. And love, I've had love from more women than I needed. And they always get in your way. And look at Tony – The pathetic infatuation he has for Anna, or any woman who has a pulse. They have rendered him senseless. Is that what you want? To be drained of your virility like Tony, or do you want to be a man? A man always keeps his word."

CENSORED! DO NOT CLICK ON THIS LINK!

EJ says he does love Stefano. Whatever the risks he will live up to his promise if Stefano will accept. Gee, what do you know, Stefano accepts, "You have no idea what this means to me." Rolf takes him back to his room to prep.

Sami has a plan. She'll distract Andre and Lucas can grab the folio. Now there's a brilliant plan. I wonder if Homeland Security knows about her. Lucas doesn't want her near that lunatic. He wants to call Roman. As Lucas dials his phone, Sami runs into the juice bar. Lucas curses and watches.

Jeremy says he can make things right. He thinks Jett is screwing with him, "You sold me out, didn't you?

Jett says, "Don't pin it on me. The cops have been onto you for months. You got yourself into it." Jeremy wants to know what he told the cops. Jett says he is on his own. Jeremy begs.

Stephanie says Max is single, "You're not tied down... I didn't mean that the way it sounded. What I meant was I have a boyfriend and I should have been the one to stop things. But whatever it was it can never ever happen again."

Max says, "Never."

Stephanie says, "Ever." Translation: Soon. Chelsea watches.

Lucas sneaks into the juice bar behind Sami.

Sami orders orange juice, unwraps a muffin and takes a bite. So much for the five calories she burned off. Andre comes up behind her and asks what she is doing there, "Shedding pregnancy pounds?" He doesn't think she is dressed appropriately for a health club. He grabs her throat, "You little twit you'd better think twice. I wouldn't hesitate to suck the life out of you." Sami collapses.


Lucas sneaks in and heads for the folio. He sees Sami putting on her fake fainting spell. Instead of grabbing the portfolio, he watches. Then he remembers what he is supposed to be doing and reaches out for the folio. Rreeaacchh... Rreeaacchh...

Jett says Touch The Sky was their dream together. Once Jeremy started smuggling girls he trashed the dream. Jeremy wonders if the cops told him about the smuggling operation. Jett says they didn't need to. He could see what was going on in front of his face. Jeremy asks how close the cops are. "Closer than you think," says Jett. He tells him if he wants to save himself, he'd better get into damage control as fast as he can.

Jeremy runs back in and tells Stephanie they have to split. He gives her and Max the eye, "Is there something going on with you two?"

Back to the juice bar. Andre struggles with Sami. Lucas watches. Rreeaacchh... Rreeaacchh... Wretch.

Shelley comes up to Lucas and says, "I've been looking for you Mr. Fry."

Meanwhile, in the other corner, Sami comes to and asks what happened.

Shelley wants to familiarize Mr. Fry with the health club operations, since he is new. Lucas says she has the wrong guy. Shelley looks him over and says, "I guess you're right, your muscles look like they're in pretty good shape. Especially the one in your head.. Shelley leaves and musclehead sneaks back out of the juice bar WITHOUT THE FOLIO.

Sami comes out. Lucas says it's time to call Roman. Sami tells him Andre has vanished.

Max and Stephanie make excuses. Stephanie wants to go to the beach. "Don't forget your sunscreen," says Max. Jeremy pulls her away and says they aren't going to the beach. Wherever Jeremy thinks he is going, Stephanie says she isn't going with him.

James Bond and Mati Hari argue. Lucas tells her he tried his best to get the folio. Roman comes up and says they couldn't find Andre, "He got away." The Bickersons keep it up. Roman shuts them up and tells Sami not to mess with Andre. He orders her to go home, "Lock yourself in your apartment, watch DVD's, play tiddlywinks... I don't care what you do, but I don't want you to leave. In fact, I'm putting out an APB on you two and if they you set foot outside the apartment, you will be arrested." He leaves. Lucas tells her they have to go. Sami says she knows Andre is still there and they have to find him.

Lucas says he isn't sticking around to play hide and seek. Sami begs him to stay. As they argue, the ugliest woman you have ever seen (except for that time John dressed up as a nun ) walks through the exercise room. Sami sees Ms. Brickface carrying the folio. "She" goes into the sauna and Sami starts to follow. Lucas tells her pregnant women aren't allowed in there, so he goes instead. Pregnant women, no. Clueless men, yes.

The doctor comes in with a sedative for EJ. He flips on the TV so EJ can watch DOOL. Roman and Bo stop the doc as he is about to administer it. Roman booms, "We have a warrant for EJ's arrest."

"A what," asks Bo.

Roman smirks, "It seems EJ has been ignoring his parking violations."

"You can't be serious," says EJ.

Roman turns to Bo, "Alternate side of the street parking violations can't be ignored."

Bo agrees, "Oh no." EJ says this is tantamount to murder. They can't get away with this.

"Put your pants on unless you want your butt hanging out," says Roman. The doctor is hesitant to stop the procedure. "I am the Deputy Police Commissioner," booms Roman, "You want to mess with me?" The doctor removes the IV.

Bo goes to tell Stefano the good news, "I hope his life insurance is paid up."

EJ starts to dress. He eyes the hypodermic needle on the table and tells Roman, "Turn around. It's not a peep show. A little privacy, please."

Stephanie decides she wants to go to the beach. Jeremy isn't in the mood. He leaves. Jett and the brat walk in. Chelsea asks if it's too late to back out of the beach party. They tell her it's too late and they invite Max. He thinks the beach sounds great.

Bo stops Rolf and Stefano as they come down the hall. He tells them there is a change of plans. He says EJ has been irresponsible and gotten arrested. They protest. Bo tells Stefano, "You can either end the vendetta or cash in your chips."

Roman reads EJ his rights. EJ rants. Suddenly, he turns and jams the hypo into Roman's leg, "Night-night, sweetheart.

Roman screams, "You SOB!"

Sami frets outside the sauna. Inside, Lucas stops Andre. Andre pulls a gun and points it at Lucas, "You're going to make one ugly stain on that wall."

No need for threats. After seeing that face, Lucas has already turned to stone. FF Lucas.

Previews
========

EJ yells at Stefano, "I am your son. So lets stop playing games, shall we, or I walk out this door right now."

Hope asks Patch, "Do you want to be a dad again? We need an honest answer – the both of us." Kayla watches.

Bo tells Stefano, "End this ridiculous vendetta, or prepare for a warm welcome in hell."

Sami asks, "What have you done with him, you creep?" Andre says, "You're going to be reunited with him very, very soon."

The Phoenix Rises Again!

Nick is at Bo and Hope's house. Hope helps with "his" kids. She asks him if he got an appointment with the pediatrician. "Yes," says Nick, "And after Dr. Davidoff examines Chelsea he'll look at China Lee's kids, too."

Nick says he's thinking of enrolling them in school. Hope tells him he doesn't have to do this. "It's only 29 more grueling days," says Nick.

"You're one in a million," says Hope, "It's pretty rare to find someone stupid enough to do this."

"Tell that to Chelsea," says Nick, "She thinks I'm choosing the kids over her."

"Well," says Hope, "I guess you do have some intelligence left."

There is a knock at the door. Chelsea bops downstairs in her bikini and towel. Jett's eyes pop out. He tells her she looks amazing. The brat notices Nick is there. She tells him she's going to the beach with Jett, "Is that a problem?"

Stefano is on the phone. Sami and Lucas listen as he asks Kate to help him. Kate is reluctant. She thinks Andre is psychotic. Sami and Lucas flail their arms and encourage Kate to play along with Stefano. Kate puts him on hold and Sami and Lucas tell her they will go in her place. Kate doesn't want to put Lucas or her future grandchildren in danger. Sami can rot. She finally agrees, gets back on the phone and tells Stefano.

EJ thanks Lexie and Benjy for coming. He tells them if one of Stefano's biological children is a match, they can donate a section of their liver. Lexie's compassion runneth over, "I wouldn't donate a toenail clipping to save him."

EJ asks her to reconsider. Lexie isn't in a reconsidering frame of mind. Benjy wants to leave. Lexie tells him to go home but EJ stops him and tells him Stefano has never needed him more. Benjy says he has to consider his own family. He leaves. EJ rages, "Even though you are not still a practicing physician, you took an oath – "First do no harm." says EJ.

"As you may recall," says Lexie, "When I was a practicing physician, I skipped that first step. Stefano is nothing to me."

Stefano tells Kate the drop will take place at the health club. Andre will find her. If there is any possibility the folio might fall into the wrong hands Kate is to destroy it. Kate understands. She hangs up.

Lucas says he is proud of Kate for doing her good dead for the year. He tells her he will handle things. Sami argues. She will help. Kate vetoes it all, "I want Sami to do it herself, and I want Lucas out of it."

"Lucas usually is out of it," says Sami.

Nick ain't thrilled. He says he came there specifically to see Chelsea. Chelsea mocks him. She accuses him of coming to get parenting advice from Hope.

"You're right," says Nick, "She raised Shawn. She's a textbook example of how not to do things."

Hope hauls the kids upstairs. They tell Hope they want to play video games. Hope says, "The only video game we have in this house is Living Room Drive Through. Shawn used to play it over and over. Maybe you should play some kind of sports outside instead."

Chelsea looks over at Jett and says, "I need a minute with bachelor father." Jett waits in the car.

Chelsea and Nick argue about the kids. Nick just can't put them in foster care. "No," says Chelsea, "Not you – Nick 'The Mark' Fallon. China saw you coming from a mile away."

Nick asks how Chelsea would have felt if no one would have taken her in after her parents died. "That's different," snorts the brat, "China Lee isn't dead. You're nothing but a babysitter to her kids."

"Those kids need me," says Nick.

"And I don't," she asks.

"Yeah," says Nick, "When you get a hairbrush stolen. I have no job, no money. All I have is you. Three children to care for – that's quite a responsibility."

Lucas says Kate can't change their minds. He asks her to go find a doctor so he can get out of there. Kate leaves.

Sami and Lucas discuss Andre. She starts to call Bo and get him involved, but Lucas doesn't want her to. That would be the intelligent thing to do, so Lucas isn't comfortable with it. Sami decides to call her dad. Lucas likes that idea because Roman will stop her. Sami thinks that one over and aborts the call. Lucas makes her promise not to take chances. She asks him to promise the same thing. "I took a chance on you didn't I," asks Lucas. He promises to protect her and the twins. Smooch.

Chelsea says she loves Nick, "But you let people walk all over you because you are desperate to be liked. I know, because I watch Dr. Phil." Nick says he destroyed evidence for her and she knows why. Chelsea says a part of her wishes he had told her to buzz off. She says she used him because she knew he would do whatever she wanted him to. She thinks he doesn't stand up for himself enough.

"Would that make you happy," he asks, "You want me to lay it all on the line, right here, right now? Why don't we go have sex, and this time make it the truth." He certainly did a nice job of slipping that in there, didn't he?

Sami leaves as Kate comes back in. She says they are getting Lucas' release papers ready. She thinks she should meet with Andre. He doesn't want her getting involved. "Because you're worried about me," asks Kate.

"Because I don't trust you," says Lucas. Kate huffs. Lucas wonders why Stefano would give her money.

"Maybe he found out my son sent the SEC after me," says Kate, "Maybe he felt sorry for me."

Lucas thinks she slept with him for money, "You did, didn't you? You're right back where you started – Stefano's whore!"

EJ has hauled Lexie in to see Stefano. Stefano suggests they get tested. Lexie tells Stefano, "I have no intention of risking my life to save yours."

Stefano asks, "Who said anything about your intentions?" So you want me to die is that it?"

"I wish I didn't," says Lexie, "but yes, I do. When you are dead there will be one less piece of evil in this world."

Stefano tells EJ he is his last hope. Lexie interrupts and says she isn't finished. Stefano tells her to get out of his sight. Lexie leaves. Stefano turns to EJ and tells him all he has to know is EJ will do whatever it takes to help him. EJ says he needs a moment to think about this. He apologizes and leaves. Tony is just standing back enjoying this. He smiles like the Cheshire Cat, "And then there were none..." He asks Stefano where he would prefer to be buried. Stefano scowls.

Kate thinks Lucas shouldn't judge her. She prefers to think that she gave Stefano companionship, and he gave her a future. She reminds Lucas Stefano gave Lucas an education. Unfortunately, it didn't take. Kate says Stefano pulled them both out of the gutter. She isn't going to apologize for what she does to survive.

Nick says the night they spent together was something he will never forget. He wants more nights like that. She says their relationship changes every day, "Together... not together..."

"Which is it right now," asks Nick.

She doesn't know where they stand now, "I'm not good enough for you."

"That's beside the point," says Nick.

Chelsea says when they first met he was all about honor and truth. Then her hairbrush ended up at a crime scene. If she had just told her dad, Willow would have had no power over her, and she would still be alive. Chelsea blames herself, "You are a different person than me and that's why I have to let you go."

Nick says he has never heard anything so wrong. She asks him not to make this hard on her. He was perfect before he got involved with her, "But that Lonely Splicer guy sure was a creep."

Nick says, "I was clumsy, awkward and clueless about women. Now I'm just clumsy, awkward and clueless. You can't just walk out on me. I know I'm not the man of your dreams but I thought I could be something to you."

Chelsea says she took advantage of that. He says she's the best thing that ever happened to him.

"Your life hasn't been that bad," says Chelsea.

Jett busts in and asks, "Hey, are you going..." He senses there is trouble in paradise, "...or maybe you want a rain check." She goes for her bag.

"Hey, man," says Jett, "What's happening."

Nick sneers, "If I had a gun I would kill you right now."

Sami finds EJ in the hall. She tells him about Stefano's call. EJ is distant. She asks if Stefano croaked. He tells her he is still alive. He also tells her about the upcoming liver switcheroo. He doesn't know if he is going to do it, "Benjy and Lexie opted out, but Lexie was very thoughtful. She did offer to rip what was left of Stefano's existing liver out and feed it to the pigeons on Main Street."

Sami says, "Give him whatever he needs. You can't let Stefano die." Sami doesn't care about Stefano but thinks he is the only one who can control Andre. She needs Stefano alive to declare the vendetta over.

EJ asks, "What if something went wrong? What if I died?"

Haven't you heard," asks Sami, "Only the good die young."

"That's a comforting thought," says EJ.

"I thought you'd think so," says Sami, "You'll do it?"

EJ says he has decided he will do it, but for Stefano, not Sami. He says Stefano really was a good father once and he can't help but love him. Sami doesn't care why EJ does it, "Just keep him alive."

Jett says Nick needs to cool it with the threats. Nick says he isn't blind. He knows Jett is trying to steal Chelsea. Jett claims Nick and Chelsea's problems aren't because of him. "You now why she's attracted to you," asks Nick, "Because you don't love her enough. My problem was loving her too much."

Chelsea comes out. Nick wants to talk more. "There is nothing left to say except for goodbye," says the brat. She leaves.

Hope comes down and asks what happened. "I just lost the best thing that ever happened to me," says Nick.

Outside, Jett asks Chelsea, "What can I do?"

"Fix me," says Chelsea.

"Like I had my dog fixed," asks Jett, "I wouldn't be a bad idea to prevent you from breeding."

He hugs her, "I'm sorry. We don't have to go to the beach if you don't feel like it." Chelsea says she still wants to go to the beach. Off they go.

Hope says, "If you love her, Nick, go after her and fight for her." The car pulls off. Nick stares.

Sami comes back. Lucas tells her Kate left. He tells her about Kate sleeping with Stefano for a loan. Sami says she knows. Lucas asks if Kate told her. "Not in so many words," says Sami. Lucas wants to know why Sami didn't call her on it. "I didn't think it mattered," says Sami. Lucas accuses her of protecting Kate. Sami says the only thing that matters is meeting Andre. Lucas says they will do it his way. He makes her swear. They leave. Kate's flowers stay, but the chocolates definitely go with Sami.

Rolf says there will be no more talk of funerals. EJ comes back. He tells Stefano he can count on him if he is a match. Stefano says he will never forget this. Everything he has one day will be EJ's. Tony wishes him good luck and leaves.

Rolf says, "Time is of the essence. We need to get you tested as soon as possible."

"Soon," says EJ. He and Rolf leave.

Stefano sits alone in bed in his room and chuckles, "It's not over yet. I'm not finished yet." He lets out a belly laugh, "The Phoenix rises again!"


Previews
========

Stephanie says, "But whatever it was it can never ever happen again." Max says, "Never." Stephanie says, "Ever."

Bo tells Roman, "As long as I've wanted that guy wiped off the face of this earth, him dying right now would be the worst thing that could happen to this family."

Andre says, "I wouldn't hesitate to sap the life out of you." Sami collapses.

Andre in drag points a gun at Lucas, "You're going to make one ugly stain on that wall."

Little Rule Breaker

The cracked coffee klatch sits around the pub and frets about Colleen's predicament instead of reading letters to find out what happened. Doug thinks Sister Mary Anne was interfering. Julie gets on him for such blasphemy.

She reads, "The knock took my breath away. It was Sister Mary Anne – as if it were God himself at the door ready to smite me."

Colleen panics. Santo shushes her as Sister Mary Anne bangs and shouts.

Lucas picks at his scones. EJ eggs him on to eat them instead of picking at them. They banter. Sami tells them to stop it.

Lucas insists Kate can't be the courier. EJ says there is nothing Kate wouldn't do if the price were right, "It's possible he could be using Kate without her knowing."

EJ's phone rings. Tony tells him they've rushed Stefano to the hospital, "His liver is shutting down. I think we're nearing the end."

The scene in Santo's room looks like something out of a Marx brother's movie only without the entertainment value. He suggests Colleen hide behind the drape. She says that is the first place Sister Mary Tattletale will look. Santo says he will get rid of her. He goes over and opens the door. Sister Mary Steamroller barges in. She rages as Colleen hides behind the drape. A large neon sign points toward the drape and flashes on and off, "Here she is... Here she is."

Bo's phone rings as Hope analyzes the situation, "Our bold little rule breaker, hiding behind the drapes."

Julie takes the ball and runs with it, "Ten little toes sticking out, muttering Hail Mary's."

John asks, "Why would her toes be muttering Hail Mary's? Anyway, we know that didn't help." Marlena says this was a doomed affair.

Bo comes back and makes the big announcement, "Stefano DiMera has been rushed to the hospital. It sounds pretty bad.

"How bad," asks John.

"Almost as bad as a show that would have it's main characters sitting around getting waterlogged on coffee and reading old letters," says Bo.

Rolf tells the nurse to leave, "Mr. DiMera is not here to be on display." She goes.

EJ rushes in and finds Tony. Tony says a liver transplant might help, but it takes time to find a donor. EJ thinks they should rush Stefano up to the top of the list, round up Patch, Kayla, John and a fairly sharp knife. He says they'll bribe someone if they have to, "We'll scour the streets of Hong Kong."

"Right," says Tony, "I’m sure Hong Kong would be the best place to find a donor who is a perfect match for someone of Italian descent. I think it's too late. The scourge of the Bradys is about to breathe his last."

EJ laments the fact Stefano is slipping away without a whimper. Tony asks, "Would you rather have him imitate Al Pacino in Scarface and have him die in a blaze of bullets?"

"You're right," says EJ, "I don't think this show could handle action. I think when father is gone no one will stop Andre."

Rolf comes out, "The master will soon leave his body. There isn't much time left. Do either of you want any Auf Wiederseins?"

"No," says EJ, "I already had lunch."

Kate has brought a huge basket of flowers and some of Lucas' favorite chocolates. Sami attacks the chocolates like a starved dog in a steakhouse. Lucas thought Kate's assets were frozen. He wonders where she got the money for these expensive gifts. Kate thinks it's rude for him to ask where she got the money for gifts. She dances around the issue and finally says she withdrew some funds from her 401k. Lucas knows she doesn't have a 401k. Sami thinks Stefano might have given Kate the money. Kate is indignant. Lucas presses, "You went begging, didn't you?"

"More like slumming," says Kate.

The Salem literary guild continues reading, "I knew is was risking my future for a moment of pleasure. I knew I wasn't ready to lose what I held most dear."

Santo asks Sister Mary Moneygrubber what she wants. Without hesitation, she says, "Perhaps a small dewnation far the are-phins." As Santo looks for his wallet Sister Mary Snoop sees Colleen's scarf lying on the bed and notices the drapes have grown feet. Santo gives her the money. She thanks him, "By the way, I don't suppose you've seen Colleen tonight? It seems she's gone missing. She was supposed to help me with the doortadoor."

Santo says he has not seen her, "Maybe she was-a confused-a 'bout the date-a."

"Right," says Sister Mary Bulldozer, "Confused she was."

Santo ushers her to the door, "Bona fortuna." She leaves.

Colleen comes out and says Sister Mary Blabbermouth knows she was there, "Santo, I'm doomed! I'm damned!" Meerciful Lard, save me. I'm likely to be the scandal of Galway by marnin'."

Santo tries to calm her down. Colleen is sure Sister Mary Eagle Eye saw her feet sticking out under the drapes. Santo asks, "How would she a-know-a dey were your-a feet-a?

Colleen turns her ankle, "Becausa my new pentagram tattoo. Do ya like it? Sister Mary Elephant never fergets anything. She'll tell da entire convent. We hafta find a way to 'splain tings."

Hope says, "I'm sure glad times have changed and a woman's entire life isn't judged by a single indiscretion any more."

"I'm afraid you've still used up your quota," says Bo.

Marlena asks, "Do you believe Colleen and Santo were destined to be together?"

John says, "Well, I know some people are." That turns Marlena on. That turns John on. He clears the table and attacks her right there in the pub.

Lucas badgers Kate about Stefano. She admits she asked him for money, "BECAUSE YOU TURNED ME IN TO THE SEC." Lucas reminds her he turned EJ in and Kate just happened to get caught in the crossfire. Kate rants. STOP THE PRESSES! KATE DISOWNS LUCAS! MAN BITES DOG! She starts to storm out. Sami stops her and says they had a reason to push. She wants Kate to hear them out.

The nurse checks Stefano. EJ comes in. He asks for time alone. The nurse leaves. EJ sits and takes Stefano's hand.

Stefano hallucinates, "Papa?"

Patch comes into the room, "You called?"

"No," says EJ, "It's me – EJ." Stefano starts to reel off information about bank accounts, safe combinations, family secrets and the coveted recipe for Alice's donuts.

EJ stops him, "No, don't father. Not now."

"There is only now," says Stefano. EJ says they have never been so far apart. He wants to thank him for the blessing of being his son and the opportunities it has brought. He reminisces. He thinks he has really disappointed Stefano.

Stefano can't fault him for falling in love with a woman and giving his soul to the love like his father. Stefano knows love ends in tears, "But for Santo the flame was too warm. It took away his reason and burned his heart. I knew father was playing with fire."

Hope believes in destiny. She thinks their destiny is to free everyone from the horror Santo brought into their lives.

Bo thinks Santo got Colleen in bed. Hope bets him she didn't. Bo reads, "I felt despair for the first time in my life. But then when you touched me and I felt the warmth of your skin, Santo. I felt a calm." Bo stops and gloats, "Get ready for diaper duty, Fancy Face. He continues, "The world dissolved away. All I could see was in that room."

Colleen wails, "I have brought shame to da choorch." Santo says there has been no sin. Colleen thinks Sister Mary Looselips will dig in her heels on this. Santo sweet-talks... Kiss. "Oh, Santo..."

Stefano says Santo was a great man, "He could have been more if only..."

"He had followed his destiny," says EJ, "Maybe that's what he did."

"Perhaps you're right," says Stefano, "Love was his fate. How different my life would have been if he had taken another road." He says he knew what his father's mistakes were and swore not to repeat them. Now he looks back on his life and he is alone. EJ swears he isn't. Stefano says he has done what Santo wanted. EJ asks him to tell Andre it's over.

"It's too late," says Stefano, "I can't stop him. I don't know where he is. There is nothing more I can do for the Bradys. I'm not a psychiatrist, you know."

Lucas and Sami ask Kate to come back. "It's about the vendetta," says Sami. Kate comes back in. They tell her about Bo and Hope going to Ireland. Cops are watching the DiMera mansion because they know Andre will try to deliver the folio to Stefano. They ask Kate if Stefano asked her to be the messenger. Kate insists he didn't. In that case, Lucas wonders how she got the money. Kate claims he gave her the money with no strings attached. Lucas accuses her of lying. Sami drops her jaw. She thinks she knows what Stefano wanted. She says Stefano gave Kate the money so that he could have her in his debt – "To be the courier."

Kate swears he hasn't asked her. Lucas wants to believe her. Sami thinks she is telling the truth.

Kate is stunned, "Thank you, Sami."

Hot kisses in Santo's room. He tosses her onto the bed. Colleen notices her scarf, "OH! Where di' this come from? Dear Lard in heav'n, she saw this! Sister Mary Buttinski knows I'm here!"

"Looks like Santo will be taking cold showers," says John.

Hope tells Bo he will be doing diapers until Easter. Julie thinks it's sad Colleen never got to spend one night in the arms of her lover. Bo thinks maybe she got a second chance. Julie says, "I think she'll never get another chance with the church or her lover."

EJ walks out and loosens his tie. Tony asks if he is all right.

EJ asks, "How do you say goodbye to someone who cared for you?" Tony says he has never had that situation. Rolf comes out and tells them surgery is risky, but if they can secure a lobe from a healthy liver it will regenerate, "There are risks to the donor, and he still needs stem cells. But there may be hope fore Stefano yet says Rolf."

Bo says, "Five toes in the grave and five left to go."

Julie asks, "If we dance on Stefano's grave, would it be bad taste?"

Marlena wonders why someone evil like Stefano got to live a long life and someone innocent like Colleen didn't. Hope reminds them they don't know how Colleen died.

They read on, "Having sin in my heart, I knew I would be punished. When I turned to you I turned my back on the church. I knew my life would never be the same."

Colleen frets about the scarf, "God's hand is in it. This is wrong. I wasna meant fer this."

"What-a for-a," asks Santo, "Feeling?"

"I have sinned," says Colleen, "but not the worst sin. Why did I come here? Why did I lie? I betrayed 'em all."

"You did not-a betray your own heart-a," says Santo, "Looka me. You are de most beautiful woman I have ever known-a. On da inside, not just da outside. God wouldn't have created such-a beauty to let it waste away."

Colleen says, "It's that kinda wicked talk that led me into sin. I will ne'er see you again." She storms out crying. Santo leans against the door.

Colleen enters the sanctuary. She composes herself and sees Father Mallory and Sister Mary What - happens - in - Galway - doesn't - stay - in - Galway. Father Mallory sees her and asks, "Is there something you should be telling me Colleen?"

Colleen says she has nothing to say. "Well I've plenty," says Sister Mary Chitchat, "I stopped at Mr. DiMera's room. I saw ten toes a-stickin' outta the drapes, and your scarf." Father Mallory says this is a grim accusation.

Doug wants to know if Sister Mary Blabbermouth ran to Pete. They figure she didn't have to, since gossip probably traveled pretty fast in Galway. "The next letter will tell," says Julie, "That was the last one in this batch. Bo thinks Stefano might go to his final reward before the last one is out. "Or his final punishment," says Doug.

"I'll drink to that," says John.

"You'll drink to anything," says Marlena.

"Unless there are pills around," says John.

Stefano knows he needs a piece of someone's liver.

"It's a shame I'm not compatible," says Tony.

"I'm sure that breaks your heart," grumbles Stefano. EJ says he will call Benjy and Lexie and he will be tested as well. EJ leaves. Tony tells Stefano his offspring won't give a damn, let alone a liver. He leaves.

Stefano asks for the phone.

Lucas wonders if Sami is tiring to play nice with Kate. Kate's phone rings. It's Stefano. Kate says she is busy. Stefano says he can't wait, "I might not live out the night. But I probably have time for a quickie." Lucas grabs the phone, sees the number and puts it on speakerphone. Stefano says he needs Kate's help, "You owe me." Kate understands.

Stefano says, "Andre has something – an old folio. I must have it but the police are watching. I need for you to meet Andre. Bring it to me. Will you do this? It's a dying wish. I need your help Kate." FF Kate.


Previews
========

Chelsea whines, "I have to go." Nick says, "No one will love you like I do."

Hope says, "If you love her, Nick, go after her and fight for her."

Lucas rants at Kate, "You did, didn't you? You're right back where you started. Stefano's whore."

Lexie tells Stefano, "I have no intention of risking my life to save yours."

Wild Women! Strumpets!

Shawn tosses a towel as Belle rants. She's sick of Shawn making decisions without asking her. Shawn wants their family – the three of them, not four, to be together. Phillip listens as they bicker. Belle claims she has committed herself to Shawn but won't let him make the decisions. The world would be a better place if bell would decide to commit herself to an institution instead of Shawn. Shawn thinks Phillip wants her back. Belle doesn't see it that way. And by God, however Belle sees it is how it's gonna be.

Jugs and Doolie arrive at Bo and Hope's house with more letters. John and Marlena tag along.

Julie reads the next installment, "Dear Santo I knew I had to see you again, but how? Here I was with other plans – to help collect donations. I knew I needed an ally."

Switch to Colleen telling Young Old Man Brady, "Da hass been ina bad moo dis week. I'll be askin' ye a faveer. Go ta the Father and the Sister and tell 'em I canna do the doortadoor. Me poor aunt is sick."

YOMB pulls a rare moment of insight out of his clueless life. He sees through it, "You are going to Stefano's Da." He begs her not to do it.

Belle and Shawn go for round two. Sameo sameo. Shawn thinks this whole thing is not about what's best for Claire, but it's about what's best for Belle.

"Your point," asks Belle. Phillip soaks it in.

Shawn insists it's the soldier inside him that makes Phillip tick, "He's suffering from Post Belle Traumatic Syndrome: he makes a plan, he attacks. The friendship is over. It's war now. This is Phillip's war, and if you don't believe me, you go over there and ask him."

Marlena thinks it must've broken Colleen's heart to ask YOMB to lie for her. They cackle about her innocence or lack thereof. Bo says the big question was if she would show up at Santo's. Doug chimes in, "And for the answer to that question, ladies and gentlemen, I now give you Julie Olson Banning Anderson Williams Williams Williams."

"Yes, please read on," says Marlena Evans Craig Brady Black North Black.

"Holy cow," says Hope, "I've got some catching up to do."

Julie reads. YOMB begs Colleen not to go to Santo. Colleen insists they are just friends, "But the sisters wouldn't understand." YOMB says if they are just friends, he will go with her. What do you know, Colleen thinks that's a rotten idea. She says she just wants happiness. YOMB wonders if she isn't happy with them. "I am," says Colleen, "But theere is happiness uther than that."

"Like you can find in a church," he asks.

"Like you can find rollin' around in the hay," she says, "Y'kno, Da has been saving so ya can go to Ameerica and college and soomeday use that fine eedecachin ta open a sleazy bar in a town called Salem."

"I don't want to."

"One day surely ya will," says Colleen, "And I'll be prouda ya. I've been wishin' fer myself, too."

"To come with me," asks YOMB.

"It's me heart's deerest wish, but Da thinks it's best this choorch is all I'll seea the werld."

YOMB asks, "But yer leavin' anyway are'na you? Even tonight?"

Shawn and Belle keep it up. Shawn thinks Phillip is the cause of all their problems. He shouts across the room, "Ain't that right, Phillip?" Phillip says he thinks Shawn and Belle need time alone together. He starts to leave. Shawn wants a straight answer. He accuses Phillip of trying to break them up. Belle asks Phillip if that is true.

Phillip says, "I just want to be a part of Claire's life and be friends with you Belle... and what's his name. If I wanted Shawn out of the way I'd call the cops and tell them about his involvement with Lauren."

Macho-boy snorts, "Shut your face!"

"It's not really my face," says Phillip, "Go ahead, take a swing."

"Yer offta meet Stefano's Da," says YOMB. Colleen insists she'll just be talking. He knows she wants him to lie. She says she will understand if he can't. He says he could lie now, but would have to admit it in confession this Sunday. He asks her not to do it.

She says she wouldn't if she didn't have to and scrapes the bottom of the barrel for the mother of all rationalizations, "Maybe it's part of God's plan." She leaves before he has time to shoot that one down.

Julie reads, "That look in the eyes of my brother went to my soul."

As YOMB stands there in disbelief, Father Mallory comes out and asks if he has seen Colleen. YOMB runs off. Father Mallory runs to the door and calls for him.

Bo and John discuss Andre. They are shadowing him. They know he'll want to get the folio to Stefano sooner or later. John says, "It's not hard to see how wide open and vulnerable the Bradys are right now. If something doesn't change, they could all wind up in an asylum."

Doug asks the ladies what they would do if they were in Colleen's situation. Marlena thinks Hope would hire a private investigator to find out about Santo's finances and his wife. And when the report came back Hope would run to him. The hens cackle with joy.

"Oh," says Doug, "You are a bunch of wild women! Strumpets!

Phillip tells Shawn to take his best shot. "Yeah," says Shawn, "You'd better watch it or I might forget you are handicapped." Phillip is so insulted by that remark he takes off his leg and pounds Shawn with it. Belle separates them.

Phillip appeals to Belle. He knows this is the last thing she wants, "Tell him Belle."

"Shawn, please," says Belle, "I need a minute alone with Phillip."

Shawn protests. Right now Belle just needs some space somewhere other than between her ears. Shawn leaves. Phillip doesn't think she's happy with the idea of living over a bar. He plays the trump card, "You have to think of what is best for Claire."

Claire finds an empty cardboard box in the slums of Salem. She crawls inside and curls up, "Best home I ever had."

Phillip thinks Shawn wants to cut him out of Claire's life as well as Belle's. He vows he won't let that happen.

John reads. Santo was tormented waiting for her, "But I knew my anguish wasn't as bad as yours. And nowhere near as bad as the viewers who had to endure this drivel."

Santo paces. Colleen knocks, and he lets her in. She says she had to sneak up. He tells her to make herself at home. Santo says if she wants, they could dine in the pub. Colleen gasps and tells him there are people down there who know her. "I'm just-a tryin' to be a gentleman," says Santo.

"Don't waste yer time," says Colleen, "We both know it's a lie to end all lies."

The crowd at Bo and Hope's argues over what Colleen was thinking. Marlena thinks she wasn't your average run-of-the-mill Brady. Hope thinks she was.

"Well, listen to this," says John, as he reads more of Santo's letter...

"Beyond all question you are the greatest pain in the neck I have ever known. The mystery of you leaves me speechless. Do you argue because you don't trust what might happen when the argument stops?"

Santo offers wine. She thinks he's trying to get her drunk so he can take liberties. So she pounds a couple down. She asks where Stefano is. "Up-a-stairs with-a Mrs. Fitzpatrick," says Santo, "Mrs. Fitzpatrick sheeza loveta stay with a-heem."

"Ya meen she's available if ya need privacy," snorts Colleen.

"You know I was-a in mourning," says Santo, "But my wife-a – sheeza been dead-a five days-a now. I'm-a over it. I have-a to move on. I was always faithful. I am no chaser of women."

"I'm sure ya woon't be telling me if ya weere," says Colleen.

"Ask-a Mrs. Fitzpatrick," says Santo. He goes off the deep end and sticks his hands out at her, "Here! Take-a my fing-er-prints!" He reaches in his desk and yanks out a pile of papers and flings them, "Go through my-a finances!" And for the Pièce de résistance he rips open his shirt, "TAKE-A MY HEARTA. IT BEATSA ONLY FOR-A YOU!"

Colleen is stunned, "It takes real genius to come up with dialogue that bad."

Belle knows Phillip is going through a hard time and it's a lot to deal with. Phillip admits he knows Shawn didn't work with Lauren. She has disappeared and has taken his son. He tells her the DNA test came back positive. Belle assures him he will find his son. Phillip thinks maybe not being able to find his son is why he is holding on to Claire so tight. He reminds us she was his daughter for her first year. Now he has a son. Phillip heard the kid crying on the phone. He knows how Shawn feels about Claire, "I get it. I just wish he did."

"Slowly but surely we're all growing up," says Belle, "More slowly than surely. Shawn will come around. Meanwhile, I promise you will be a part of Claire's life."

"I'm not sure anyone can stop Shawn," says Phillip.

"Watch me," scowls Belle-zebub.

Phillip thinks Shawn will cut him off if he decides to. Belle has to see Shawn for what he is.

Belle insists Shawn is doing the best he can. She wants Shawn to respect their friendship. Phillip doesn't know if he Shawn will do that, but their friendship is still there. Hugs. He thanks her for going to bat for him. Shawn watches. Belle offers to help if she can. Phillip leaves, "See ya back at the mansion... no. Let's just say, I'll see ya."

Shawn comes out and asks what her decision is. Belle says she told him they were moving out and into the pub, "On one condition..."

Santo continues to rip his clothes off, "Tell me what-a you want!" She wants him to button his shirt. Santo says he is done holding out his heart to her so she can insult him, "I am a man of conscience with a passion-a for life-a. I will never beg for love-a, but I might ask for a new shirt. You haveta choose-a. Is your life-a. Is your future." He opens the door, "If you walk out-a it is your cowardice that drove you. You couldn't face what you really want-a. Eet is-a your life-a. Live eet for yourself-a, not your father. And if you a-want to go live behind thee convent wall-a, go – with a-my blessing. You have to choose."

She closes the door and kisses him.

Belle says her condition is if she agrees, Shawn has to let Phillip spend time with Claire. Shawn protests. Belle says she doesn't throw her friends away. Starting now they make decisions together. Shawn agrees. She heads to Phillip's to pack. He offers to go. She vetoes it. Shawn says he gets it. Shawn has learned to say he gets it even when he doesn't. Hugs. He thanks her for everything. She has been amazing. Things will be different. He promises. She hopes so. She leaves. OK, boy, this is your chance run like hell.

The group discusses Santo and Colleen. Marlena reads, "To this day I can't be certain if it were divine intervention or bad luck, but we never counted on having a visitor. If the knocking at the door had started one minute later, we wouldn't have been in an answering frame of mind."

Sighs and kisses fill the room. Sweet-talking Santo goes into high gear. He tells Colleen to follow her heart. He sits her on the bed, removes her shoes and then throws himself on top of her. Then we hear the dreaded knock on the door.

Sister Mary Anne calls from outside, "Let me in. We need to talk." Colleen panics. FF.


Previews
========

Marlena asks, "Do you believe that Colleen and Santo were destined to be together?" John says, "Well, I know some people are."

Colleen gasps, "Santo, I'm doomed! I'm damned!"

Sister Mary Busybody stands at the door and asks Santo, "I don't suppose you've seen Colleen tonight? It seems she's gone missing."

Bo announces, "Stefano DiMera has been rushed to the hospital. It sounds pretty bad."

EJ says, "That's fantastic." Stefano lies in his hospital bed and says, "It is too late. There is nothing more I can do for the Bradys."

Mad Max' Wild Ride

Stephanie and Jeremy are in the bar in Vegas. Stephanie wants to know what Jeremy is mixed up in. He says if he told her she would leave him. They argue as Max and Jenna walk by in a heated rush. Jeremy thinks Patch will love saying I told you so when he finds out about this.

Jenna and Max wait for the elevator. Jenna attacks him before the doors even open. He wants to know what her hurry is. He's used to being in the driver's seat. "Ah, yes," says Jenna, "Max Brady the race driver. Well, I'm ready for Mad Max' wild ride."

Chelsea and Nick are up in the hotel room. Nick tells her they live in a world of unforeseen consequences. The unforeseen consequences, Artemis and DeMarquette, charge into the room. Chelsea wants to know what's going on.

Belle meets Shawn in the pub. No one else is there. Shawn lights candles at their table to prepare for the romantic celebration. Belle wants to know what they are celebrating. Shawn tells her he has found a place of their own, "It's something we can afford. It has a killer kitchen and built in babysitter."

Belle is intrigued. She wants to know more. Shawn announces he has arranged for them to live upstairs at the pub rent-free.

One of Belle's many personalities, Belle-zebub the satanic ice-woman, emerges. Ironically, ice-woman spits fire. Her head turns 360° on her neck, "THIS IS THE WORST IDEA YOU HAVE EVER HAD!"

The room goes cold. Back in his den of evil, Satan cowers. Texas changes its state slogan to "Don't Mess With Belle."

Shawn imagines he can hear Aerosmith singing somewhere:

There goes my old girlfriend,
Another diamond ring...
They argue. Shawn says he has it all figured out. With his steady job at the garage and tips from the pub, he'll have enough money soon to get their own place. Belle rages at him for making decisions without talking to her. Shawn agrees, "You're right, my bad." He's not getting off that easy. Belle thinks he has ambushed her. Shawn backpedals like a wounded prizefighter. He says he didn't mean for that to happen.

Belle softens, "I love you but I don't want to move Claire right now."

Nick sends the kids off to brush their teeth. He tells Chelsea China Lee is in jail and until the marriage is annulled, he is the dad.

Max and Jenna are in the elevator headed upstairs. She presses the 'stop' button and jumps him. Literally.

Stephanie wants Jeremy to be straight with her. He insists he's trying to protect her. It's about to hit the fan and he's scared he might lose her. He tells her he thought he was helping people bringing them into the country. She wants to know more. "It gets ugly," says Jeremy.

Stephanie explodes, "My dad was right. You are nothing but a crook, you lying jerk!"

"I couldn't back out," pleads Jeremy, "These guys play for keeps."

Stephanie asks, "You think they will be there to help you when you get caught? No, you'll go to jail and I have to face the mother of all I told you so's."

"Well," says Jeremy, "I guess you're Daddy's little girl after all."

Jenna works her way down Max' body, "Going down, 12th floor. Intimate apparel." She resurfaces and whispers a few notions into Max' ear. Max drops his jaw. Jenna starts the elevator again.

"You are a bad influence on me," says Max.

Jenna says, "I know what I want, I know how I want it, and I want it now." She rips Max' shirt off, "But this isn't a proposition. Don't read anything into this."

Chelsea chuckles. She thought Nick was serious about being a parent. Nick says it's just for 30 days. He doesn't exactly know how he will deal with it. Chelsea suggests calling the cops and telling them China Lee abandoned him. He asks for her help, "It's temporary."

"Temporary insanity," she says, "Count me out."

"There's nothing temporary about the insanity on this show," he says.

Shawn says he didn't expect this. Belle says she didn't expect him springing this on her. She flashes her ring. She says it is a symbol of their future. Transparent and fake. Shawn thinks this is about Belle wanting to live with her ex husband rather than her own fiancée.

Belle thinks that remark was unfair. Only she is allowed low blows. Shawn thought Belle would love it there. She says she doesn't want another temporary home for Claire. Shawn is tired of living off Phillip's dime and wants to know why she doesn't feel the same way.

"Because Phillip actually has a dime," says Belle.

Stephanie wants to know why Jeremy doesn't just go tell his sob story to one of his hot babes. Jeremy shouts, "I'm not in love with any of them."

Stephanie whines, "What did you say."

Jeremy says, "I think I... just said I'm in love with you."

Jenna works her way down to Max' trousers. The trousers come off. Clothes fly. As Max stands there in the altogether and gets into things, she hauls out a pair of handcuffs behind her back.

Chelsea says she is out of there. Nick thought they were in this together. Chelsea says there are limits. She votes for foster care. She accuses him of putting someone else's happiness ahead of theirs, "You're a magnet for the needy. When do I get to be at the head of the line?"

"It's only 30 days," says Nick, "Are you saying we can't deal with this for 30 days in order to save our relationship?" Chelsea stares at him. Nick continues, "Because I hope that's not what you are asking."

Belle says she won't turn on Phillip. Shawn wants to know if she really wants to live off of Phillip. Belle asks what Shawn would do if the situation were reversed. Shawn claims he would give Phillip money, but not let him live with them, "Because how could all of us live in a tiny room above the pub?" He thinks Phillip is going to do everything he can to get Belle back. Belle insists that won't happen. Shawn wants her to go tell Phillip that or he will do it himself.

Chelsea twirls her hand in the hot tub. Nick comes out. He wonders if there is such a thing as being too nice, "It's not a far cry from nice guy to doormat." He says when they get back he will talk to Mickey about foster care. Jett watches from the next room. Chelsea says she doesn't know too many girls who would stay by their boyfriend after he got married in Vegas on a whim. He reminds her he was in Vegas, but his brain was scattered across Sami and Lucas' hallway.

"It's not how it's supposed to be," says Chelsea.

"It will be better when we get rid of the kids," says Nick.

"No," says Chelsea, "when you decide your girlfriend gets priority in your life." She goes into the next room and asks Jett if he wants to go dancing.

Stephanie can't believe Jeremy said that. It's the first time he ever said he loves her. Jeremy protests. He's sure he's said it before.

"'I love you in your bikini' doesn't count," says Stephanie. She thinks he uses her and takes her for granted. She is done with it. She says he isn't the only guy in the world as she storms off.

Jenna cuffs Max to the rail. Max gets nervous, "I'm not into this kind of thing."

"This is the deal," says Jenna, "You stay here and I go home."

"You go home," asks Max, "You ought to turn pro."

"I am a pro," she says.

Max yells, "What the hell is this all about?"

Jeremy joins Stephanie at the bar. He thinks opening up to her was a big mistake. She thinks he told her he loved her to get out of a tight spot. He insists not. "Then say it again," says Stephanie, "I dare you."

Silence.

She talks about the attractive side of Jeremy and the bad side. The speech about the attractive side is a lot shorter. It has finally hit her he is too insecure and scared to own what they have.

Jeremy asks, "Are you giving me my working papers?"

"Of course not," says Stephanie, "I'm too stupid for that. I'm saying if you can't be real with me, I'll find someone else."

"Sounds like you already found him," says Jeremy, "Anybody I know."

The main candidate for his replacement stands naked as a jaybird handcuffed to the elevator rail. Jenna pulls out her cell phone and takes his picture. Max begs, "Tell Rawlings I'll do whatever he wants."

Jett thought Chelsea had taken him off her list. The brat says she changed her mind because he puts her first. Jett asks Nick if he wants to come with them. Cold stares fill the room. Jett wants to know what is going on.

Belle settles down. She thinks they should take a time out. She says she knows Shawn wants to get away from Phillip because he feels guilty about not telling him about this child.

Phillip limps in, "I hope I'm not interrupting."

"Of course not," says Belle, "What's up."

Phillip says, "Claire has been going off about that CGI movie that's out. I was thinking we could all go." Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding! SORAS ALERT! Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding!

Shawn says, "We're taking her and moving out tonight." He actually talks pretty well with his foot lodged in his mouth.

Phillip thinks it's short notice. Shawn tells him about the pub deal. Belle thinks Shawn is acting like a little kid caught cheating. Shawn insists this is what they both want. Phillip turns to Belle and asks her to look him in the eye and say that.

"Come on, Nick," says Jett, "I wanna see what you have on the dance floor."

"You've obviously never seen him dance before," says Chelsea. Nick thanks him but says he has decided to stay there, "Have a blast." Jett and Chelsea leave. Nick broods. The kids come out and ask if they did a good job brushing their teeth. "It ought to be a great job," says Nick, "You've been in there a half hour." He sends them to watch TV and says they will go home in a while.

"Where is home," says Artemis.

"Good question," says Nick.

Jenna sneers, "Mr. Lowell says you guys are even now."

"I don't even know a Mr. Lowell," says nekkid Max. He hesitates, "Oh, he's that rat bastard from the plane!"

The elevator stops. The doors open and Jenna walks out. The ladies club stands outside and they all take in the show. "Going up," asks Max.

Jeremy says he thinks Stephanie already has his replacement. She says she doesn't play those games. She's not trying to change him, but there is room for improvement. He asks for her patience.

"Say it again," says Stephanie.

"I love you," says Jeremy.

Stephanie smiles, "You better." Kiss. "Last one to the hot tub pays for the mini-bar," says Stephanie.

They wave at Jett and Chelsea on the way out. Chelsea says, "There is a couple that survived a breakup."

Jett asks, "Can we say the same for you and Nick?"

Nick sits on his couch. He answers a knock at his door. Max stands there in a towel. Nick stares and asks, "Trick or treat?"

"Trick," says Max.

"What happened," asks Nick.

"Ask the hotel handyman," says Max. Nick tells him about the kids. Max says he will help.

"Oh, thank you," gasps Nick. He hugs him. A guy hug, of course. They decide they have to get outta dodge. The kids come out and leave with Nick. Max starts to dress as Stephanie and Jeremy walk in. Jeremy wants to know what is happening, "Why are you standing there in half of a pair of handcuffs? Somebody's been naughty!" Stephanie leaves. Jeremy stares.

Jett says he noticed the energy was bad upstairs. She says Nick thinks she should be there for him no matter how crazy things get. Jett wonders if Chelsea has outgrown Nick.

Nick passes by with the kids acting like kids. Chelsea wants to go dancing.

Belle asks to speak to Shawn alone. She tells him no decision has been made. She says they are done talking. Belle thinks Claire is happy where she is and she thinks Shawn is dealing with stupid macho things. Phillip listens as they argue. Belle says she isn't leaving Phillip's house until they have a permanent place to call home.

"Please don't choose Phillip over me," says Shawn, "If you do..."

Belle-zebub interrupts, "If I do, WHAT?"

"Just don't," says Shawn. FF Belle.

Claire stands at the podium, "I am honored to be the Salem High class valedictorian. It has been a lot of hard work, especially since I was born into a family where the smartest one was the hammer in my dad's toolbox..."


Previews
========

John tells Bo, "It's not hard to see how wide open and vulnerable the Bradys are right now."

Santo says, "It is-a your life-a. Leeve eet for yourself-a. And if you a-want to go leeve behind thee convent wall-a, go – with a-my blessing." She kisses him. Things heat up.

Shawn tells Belle, "The friendship is over. It's war now. This is Phillip's war, and if you don't believe me, you go over there and ask him."

Ya Gotta Love Alice

Ya gotta love the DOOL matriarch, Alice. She's not immune to a Prevuze jab or two, though...











Have a great weekend, gang.

See Ya Later, Elevator

Kayla talks baby talk. She talks to Pocket, too. She tells Steve she's going to the hospital because Roman is being released. He asks if she is taking the baby. "No," says Kayla, "Stephanie is in Vegas." Steve wants the Pocket Man to stay there so he can watch him.

Bo comes into Roman's room, "What's the holdup? Didn't you get your fill of jello?"

Roman tells him their mom called. They have to wait until Kayla gets there, "Either Kayla gives the OK, or Mom moves in to play nurse."

Bo laughs, "Id da big bad powiceman afwaid of his mommy?"

"So are you, dammit," snorts Roman, "She's 98 pounds of tough turkey and beef jerky."

"No," says Bo, "She's 98 pounds of beef jerky who raised a couple of turkeys. You mean you're gonna stay here just because Mom said so?"

Roman whips out his cell phone and shoves it at Bo, "OK, Braveheart, you give her a call. Tell her we're through taking orders." Hope piles on as the two of them taunt Bo and dare him to make the call.

Max brings Jenna a drink. On the other side of the bar Stephanie gives Chelsea the 411 on herself and Max as she turns to watch Max and Jenna talk. Stephanie tells Chelsea, "Max is... seeing... other... people..."

Jenna says if Max plays his cards right, he'll have a night he'll never forget.

Nick answers the door in his robe. A man delivers China Lee's kids to their "father." Nick protests. He tells the guy to take them to their mom. The guy tells Nick China Lee left his name in case of emergency. He wishes Nick good luck.

Nick is desperate, "You can't leave these two Ritalin starved pythons with me! They don't even know me. I'll prove it." He turns to the kids, "What's my name?"

DADDY!

Nick tries to work his way out of it. The guy suggests calling the authorities. The kids chime in, "No, Daddy, no!"

There is an alternative," says the guy, "The hotel has two albino tigers. Their feeding time starts shortly..."

Chelsea badgers Stephanie about Nick. Stephanie says, "I don't know what happened... rather, exploded in that room up there. Max is my uncle.

"Not by blood," says Chelsea, "It didn't stop you the last time you got together. Or me, for that matter."

"I was a different person then," says Stephanie, "What am I doing? I don't even know who I am anymore."

Max says he's been spending a lot of time in Vegas, but this is the first time he's been propositioned. Jenna is shocked, "Excuse me?" She says she was just yanking his chain. Max starts with a comeback, but she puts her finger up to his mouth and shushes him, "You have such soft lips."

"Soft lips," repeats Max, "Yeah, and you have a nice finger."

"I have nine more where that came from," says Jenna, "So, what if I really was propositioning you in that way? What then Mr. Max?" Max contemplates.

Bo tells Roman to put the phone away. Hope wonders when the two of them will grow up. Pocket will be an adult before these two are. Hope leaves to check on paperwork. Roman turns to Bo, "Mom, Kayla, Hope... they all want to take care of me. What the hell is more pathetic than a middle age guy on his own?"

"Fortunately," says Bo, "You don't have to worry about that since you passed middle age a long time ago. But the one thing that is more pathetic is a middle aged guy in a marriage he wishes he could get out of."

"Yeah, I feel sorry for you, Bo," says Roman, "I took a shot at marriage. Had the best, why settle for less... No! I'm not going back."

Bo asks, "If you could, would you."

Roman hesitates, "Doc's with John, and Kate... I kind of get the feeling maybe that moment's gone."

"What about Anna," asks Bo. Inquiring minds want to know.

"Anna is with Tony," says Roman. He says he wanted to kick the hell of Tony when he and Anna showed up together in his hospital room.

Kayla tells Patch things are set with Hope. Steve wants her to leave Pocket. He thinks she doesn't trust him alone with the kid. Kayla doesn't think it's such a good idea. She suggests he go spend the evening at the Cheatin' Heart or call Benjy. She asks if he is OK with this. Patch sucks it up, "Sure I am." Smoochies. Kayla leaves. Patch gives his Cyclops stare and wanders the lonely room.

Roman says he doesn't want to get back together with Anna, but what got him was Tony's attitude. Hope comes back in and announces she has to rush out. Once Hope is gone, Roman turns to Bo and says, "That stuff I was just talking about here, I was just blowing off steam."

"Don't you worry about it," says Bo, "You're the rock in this family, man. We know that because you have the same IQ as one." Roman asks about Andre. Bo says all they can do is wait. Roman doesn't want a bunch of chatty women taking care of him. He wants to go back to work. Kayla comes in. She overheard what he said and tells him he's not strong enough. She has to sign for him to go back on duty and isn't going to.

Meanwhile, back at the Nick Fallon Day Care Center, Artemis and DeMarquette have a pillow fight that is completely out of control. Nick wastes his breath by telling them to cool it. Two flight attendants come in and the kids ask them to play tag. Nick is on the phone trying to locate China Lee. He asks the kids their last name. Silence. The flight attendants give the kids pilot badges. Chaos reigns.

"Thai's it," says Nick, "My life is over."

Stephanie is so confused. There's Jeremy, there's Max, – Max came out of nowhere. She says she and Max are ancient history.

"So are Roman orgies," says Chelsea, "Like the one you were having in the hot tub upstairs."

"It was that scuz hitting on me on the plane," says Stephanie, "That got me all messed up." Chelsea tells her to figure out who and what she wants.

"Pucker up Mr. Max," says Jenna, "If that were my intention, what would you say?"

"That depends on what you are really up to," says Max.

Roman protests. He has to get back to work, "Andre is out there harboring this leather thingamajig."

Bo leans in and whispers, "Folio, Roman. It's a folio."

Kayla says Roman can go back if he's willing to spend two weeks at his desk, "Take the offer, or I can keep you here until your retirement." Roman huffs.

Max thinks he might wind up paying somehow. Jenna says, "Meet me in five minutes on the elevator. Ride up with me, and if you're still feeling nervous, you can ride the elevator all day long. See ya later, elevator."

Stephanie insists she's in love with Jeremy, "Max may not be steady but he is a good guy." Stephanie walks off. Jett comes up to Chelsea. She tells him she has to go meet Nick. He asks for just five minutes.

Max pays his bill. Jeremy intercepts him and says it will take Ilsa a week to get hold of all the girls. She wants them to swear they will fly them out.

Jenna is on the phone, "How'd you like me to seal the deal with Max? Yummy. Ill let you know when it is done." She hangs up and blows Max a kiss. Max follows. Stephanie watches.

Roman says it's a deal, "One week."

"No," says Kayla, "Two weeks. You know, I'd rather be home with my husband." The boys ask where Pocket is. Kayla says she left him with Hope.

That sends Bo and Roman into fits of uncontrollable laughter. Roman composes himself enough to ask, "Why didn't you leave him with Steve so he can remember which end the diaper goes on?"

Bo chuckles, "I think she left him with Hope so the kid has a chance off making it to his first birthday." Guffaw, guffaw, guffaw...

Adrienne brings Steve a truckload of books on parenting. Steve runs through them, looking at the titles, "'Happy children made easy.' Sounds like a cookbook. 'Daddy Don't Drop Me.' Are you kidding? Who comes up with these titles? 'The Joy of Nursing..."

"That's one of my favorites," says Adrienne. Patch tells her he doesn't have time for books. He has a baby in the house and a wife who thinks he can't cut it. He wants fatherhood 101, "Right now."

Kayla defends Steve. She tells the boys he can take care of a baby. "As long as you put a sign on it," says Roman, "This end up." He and Bo crack up over Steve's inability to handle a kid. Kayla jumps to his defense and leaves.

The room goes quiet after Kayla leaves. Roman asks, "Do you think we went too far?"

Kayla stands alone and tries to convince herself, "Steve is a great father. He was. He will be." She imagines Patch passed out on the couch with the baby playing with its food, "I'm just as bad as the rest of them."

Adrienne can't tell Steve how to be a good father, "I have never been one. I think you should be the best you can be in the moment and use common sense."

"Dang," says Steve, "There's always a catch." He says Kayla won't even give him a trial. Adrienne suggests just starting with a little and working his way up, "It's about being the kind of father we never had. The kind of father you wanted ever since you were a little boy. The kind of father who could raise kids that didn't grow up to be total nutcases."

Patch doesn't remember what he wished for as a kid. He's still working on his adult memories. Adrienne thinks Steve should do the little things, "Warm up the bottle before you are asked. Burp the kid after you give him a beer. Tell her how you feel. Share it all with her. Remember, she takes her job as seriously as you do. If you would get off your lazy butt and find a job, that is."

He tells her she is really something. She says it runs in the family, "What are little sisters for?"

"Hugging," says Patch. He hugs her. And thus begins the great barf bag shortage of 2007.

The flight attendant offers snacks to the kids. A Vegas cop has arrived. He tells Nick China is well known on the strip, "Her real name is Cassandra L. Arvin. She's currently under arrest for soliciting. She'll be in jail for 30 days. Can the PD do anything for you?""

"Shoot me," says Nick.

"I'm sorry, sir," says the cop, "This isn't the Salem PD. We don't shoot our victims."

Nick is exasperated, "What am I gonna do with these kids for 30 days?"

Jett says he may lose his job. He wants her to hear him out. She agrees, "Start talking..."

Jenna drags Max off. Stephanie stews. Jeremy walks up. She wonders why his business always involves other women, "I'm tired of sitting alone at a bar while you are off doing business. How about making me a priority for once?"

Jeremy asks, "So what you're saying is you want me to stop going off on business and spend some time with you."

Stephanie says, "No, what I'm saying is I'm going to find someone to sit with who isn't a total creep."

A doctor signs for Roman to go. He tells him to go home and climb into bed. Roman says he understands. The doctor leaves. Roman tells Bo he wants to go to the station. Bo wants him to give himself one night off. "Andre is out there," says Roman.

Bo says, "You're settin' yourself up as bait."

Roman doesn't care, "I know what the stakes are."

Bo says, "Yeah. Your life."

Patch reads that all-time parenting classic, 'Daddy don't drop me.' Kayla comes back. She says she didn't expect him to be there. She notices Patch put together the baby's swing. "There were only a few parts left over," says Steve.

Kayla apologizes for not leavening Pocket with him. He knows she has faith in him. Tonight he's going to live up to that. He has prepared a hot sake bath for her. Then they will see where they go from there, "Mamas need breaks too."

Kayla suggests feeding Pocket, putting him to bed and then both getting in the tub. Pocket fusses.

Nick yells, "Am I being punk'd? Is that's what is going on?" The cop says social services can take the kids. Nick says he was scammed, but insists it's his problem. The cop wishes him luck and leaves.

Nick gets their attention, "All right, junior pilots, tomorrow we're going to the magical kingdom of Salem. What we do there is anybody's guess."

Jett says breaking cover is the #1 sin. She distracted him. He didn't want to put her in danger, "I really like you."

"I like you too."

"Don't you mean 'liked' – past tense," asks Jett, "I still... you know..." His five-minute timer beeps. He tells her to go be with her man and leaves.

Jeremy wants to know who has been talking to Stephanie. He swears he is her guy, but if she doesn't know that by now, it's too late. When he says he's doing business that's what he's doing. She is right about not coming first. He got mixed up in something. The less she knows the better. He's working to clean it up because he doesn't want to lose her.

Roman is impatient to leave. Hope comes back. They wheel Roman out. Bo holds Hope up, "I don't say this enough, but I just want you to know how thankful I am for you." Hope wonders where this is coming from all of a sudden. "I just want you to know," says Bo, "How lucky we have been to spend all the Days Of Our Lives together."

Roman wheels back up and tells them to hurry up. He asks if they mind if on the way home Roman stops at a mini mart and gets a soup for one. "Soup for one coming right up, happy bachelor man," says Bo.

The nurse wheels Roman off as he thanks Bo. Hope asks, "Happy bachelor man?"

"I'm just being facetious," says Bo.

"You," asks Hope, "Facetious?"

"Yeah."

She turns to him, "Spell it, Brady."

"That's too big of a word for me to spell," says Bo. Kiss. FF.


Previews
========

Jenna says, "I know what I want, I know how I want it, and I want it now." She rips Max' shirt off.

Jeremy shouts, "I'm not in love with any of them." Stephanie whines, "What did you say." Jeremy says, "I think I... just said I'm in love with you."

Shawn says, "If you choose Phillip over me..." Belle snaps, "If I do, what?" Flash to Phillip.

Samithermia

Tony sits at a table and tells his bimbos about the lights in Spain. He thinks they should see them. They can go when he has more time. EJ walks in and Tony excuses himself. Bimbo #1 asks, "What about Pamplona? What about the bulls?"

"To be continued," says Tony.

He walks over to EJ, "If there was ever a face that screamed bring me the whiskey and leave the bottle, I'm looking at it. Ah, yes... the pressure of the DiMera legacy... or is it the curse... uneasy lies the head that wears the crown."

EJ says he never asked for the DiMera crown and Stefano isn't giving it to him. Stefano used to tell EJ he could conquer the world, "He had dreams, but they weren't mine." Tony asks what EJ wants. EJ sighs, "To have Samantha love me half as much as I love her."

Sami checks the hallway. Lucas is reading the Kama Sutra. He twists himself up like a pretzel and announces he has found a new position. The poor guy didn't read the part about having a woman with him when he does this. Sami starts to join him, but is concerned about his machines going off again. Lucas insists he can control the machines, "Mind over matter, you know."

"Don't you need a mind to do that," asks Sami.

Lucas is desperate, "Come on! The launch sequence has been activated."

A nurse walks in with a full body sponge bath and oil massage. That gets Lucas' attention. He suggests maybe Sami should go home. "Oh, hell no," snaps Sami.

Nick gambles as China lee watches. She encourages him as he loses. He's $1,000 down. He wishes he had Pete's glass eye. "Twenty five dollars to get married," he says, "And $25,000 to get out of it." Getting rid of China Lee... priceless.

Stephanie and Max maul each other. "You know I'm with Jeremy," says Stephanie.

"Jeremy who," asks Max.

"I love him," she protests as she pulls him in for more.

Meanwhile, out in the hallway, Jeremy tells Jett, "Don't give me that 'best buds' routine. Are you selling me out here? Are you a cop, Carver?"

Jett asks, "Do I look that stupid?"

Jeremy says, "No, but then again, not all cops are from Salem."

Sami thinks the nurse must be exhausted. Nursie tells Lucas to relax. Lucas has no problem following orders. Nursie rubs. Sami suggests she must have other patients who need her. Lucas reminds Sami the massage is doctor's orders. Sami suggests helping. She can handle Lucas and then Nursie can help other patients. Nursie agrees, "Mrs. Fiddleman needs me." Nursie goes to work on Mrs. Fiddleman while Mrs. Fiddlearound stays to help Lucas. As she leaves, Nursie reminds them, "Don't forget his pressure stockings. Remember those extremities."

Lucas tells Sami, "My extremities only have eyes for you."

It's not his eyes Sami is worried about. She massages. Lucas says it feels good. "It's only gonna get better from here," says Sami.

Stephanie pulls a card from Sami's deck, "We can't do this!" Max thinks maybe they can. "It's not right," she protests.

"It feels right to me," says Max. Stephanie reminds him they tried it before. Max says dumping her was a mistake. They dive in again, she calls it off again. They go at it again... Max may need to be treated for whiplash. Chelsea walks into the room and takes in the show.

Tony thinks EJ has it bad. EJ says he feels like a fool being completely captivated by a woman. Tony suggests he enjoy every excruciating moment, "It hurts to good." EJ tells Tony Stefano is furious with him. He wants him to deal with his obstacles the DiMera way.

"Meaning just remove them," says Tony. He asks about Lucas' little "accident" and if EJ was involved.

"Maybe," says EJ. Tony tells him taking Stefano's advice can be deadly. "The only thing I can think about is Samantha," says EJ.

Tony completes EJ's sentence, "And how to off her husband." Tony advises him that he can have her if he believes she is worth the sacrifice.

Sami rubs. Lucas oohs, aahs and gets excited. He thinks she should leave. Sami decides trying to figure out baby names will provide a distraction. Lucas thought they already decided on Tom and Colleen, but Sami wants him to play along. Lucas suggests Lucy and Ricky. Sami vetoes, "I don't want anything with an apostrophe either."

"I guess that leaves out 'Book and End,' says Lucas, "And there goes 'Ham and Cheese.'" Lucas was absent the day they covered 'apostrophe' in school. They veto Roman and Kate and try 'Marlena' on for size.

Sami works up the leg. Lucas stops her, "I think we're about six and a half inches from liftoff."

Max and Stephanie work on their water ballet routine.

Jeremy says Jett is always there asking questions that are none of his business. Jett thinks Jeremy is seeing conspiracies everywhere.

Chelsea runs out of the room. Jeremy asks if Stephanie is OK. Chelsea chokes on her words, "Uh... Why shouldn't she be?"

"What she needs," says Jeremy, "is a dose of the hot tub, champagne and me. She should be fine."

Chelsea the linebacker throws a block, "You can't go in there!" Naturally, Jeremy wants to know why. Chelsea stammers, "I have to change my underwear... I'm headed for the casino, and I can't go without my lucky underwear." She rushes back inside.

"Lucky for the guy," says Jeremy.

"Unless he happens to see her in them," says Jett.

Chelsea runs in and announces Jeremy's presence to the swim team. Then she goes back outside and thanks Jeremy and Jett for waiting. She leaves as the dynamic duo walks inside.

Stephanie is standing there dripping wet. Jeremy orders, "Get those beautiful buns in the hot tub." She suggests a shower instead.

Jett walks out into the hot tub area, where Max is doing some underwater exploring. Max surfaces and takes a deep breath. "What the hell are you doing," asks Jett.

Nick looks at his cards and decides to hold. The dealer turns her card over and shows him a King and Queen. "Game over," says Nick, "I'm broke."

"Broke-broke," asks China Lee.

Nick says he has nothing. China knows he tried, "At least DeMarquette and Artemis have their daddy." Nick says they need a real daddy. She thinks he's talking fairy tales, but agrees to sign the annulment papers, "This town is full of easy marks but you are the first one I actually liked." Smooch, "Hang tight baby." Nick walks over to the bar, orders a draft and charges it to Jeremy.

Chelsea runs up and tells him about Stephanie, Max and the water show they put on which was better than the Bellagio. She asks, "Did you lose all your money?"

Nick says, "I don't have a nickel to my name. China Lee signed the annulment papers. We're free."

Janis Joplin walks up and reminds him, "Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose."

She hugs him.

Tony brings up the subject of the key. EJ says Stefano will never give it up. Tony says he had it for a short time but Bo and Hope took it to Galway, "There was a folio in the tabernacle, but someone got there ahead of them. It's in Stefano's hands or Andre's. There are revelations inside. All the Brady's are in danger, but the information could end the vendetta."

EJ asks, "The contents of this vault... this could end the vendetta?"

Tony says, "On the contrary. The contents are so devastating the Bradys would destroy the folio and everything in it, letting the vendetta go on indefinitely rather than expose it to the light of day."

EJ says, "Three more words and that answer would have been longer than the Gettysburg Address." He thinks it doesn't make any sense, "If it holds the end of the vendetta why would they want to destroy it?"

"You have to go to the inner workings of Stefano's mind," says Tony. EJ asks him to explain it. "It's baroque architecture," says Tony, "Mental stairways of twists and turns that lead to nowhere. It came from Santo."

"So Santo's mind is warped and twisted," asks EJ.

"Yes," says Tony, "It was so bad he was once made an honorary citizen of Salem. Can you imagine Santo seeing this cruel murder of the love of his life, his heart torn to shreds? He sent Stefano on the road to revenge. All is written in the folio and if you can get your hands on it you will know – and maybe have everything you ever wanted."

EJ asks, "Samantha?"

"Hmmm...," says Tony, "Would you excuse me? It's good to be back." He goes back to his bimbos.

Nursie walks into Lucas' room and finds the bed empty. She presses the call button. Lucas comes out of the bathroom, "Nothing like a nice hot shower." She asks why he isn't wearing the pressure stockings. "They weren't my style," says Lucas, "Do you have something in a tope? Perhaps fishnet?"

She orders him back in bed, "I heard you were a trouble maker." As he scoots into bed she soaks in the back of his gown.

"No peeking," says Lucas. Apparently, Lucas isn't wearing his lucky underwear.

Sami pops out of the bathroom, "Hey, Lucas, we... oops."

Jett says Max would have been in big doo-doo if Jeremy had discovered them. He needs Max to be an unbiased witness and thinks he can't be if he's shacking up with Jeremy's girlfriend, "I'm not having months of undercover work go down because you can't keep your pants zipped!"

Jeremy chases Stephanie through the room and out to the hot tub area. He sees Max standing there in his pants dripping wet, "Is it raining out here?"

Max says, "Jett dunked me." He beats a hasty retreat.

Jeremy congratulates Jett for getting the best of Max. He suggests hitting the slots and walks away. Stephanie gives Jett a look.

Nick can't believe it, "Maybe she was looking for deeper pockets."

"The moral," says Chelsea, "is the next time you are in Vegas about to be married, make sure..."

Nick interrupts, "There is only one woman I want. You." Kiss.

"I love your lips," says Chelsea.

"They're all I have to offer," says Nick, "No job. No money." Chelsea thinks they will figure something out – Together. "You don't think I'm a loser," asks Nick.

"Jeremy already has that title."

The loser convinces Stephanie to go do something. She walks off as he grabs Ilsa. She figures instead of hitting the slots, Jeremy must have said, "hit the sluts."

Chelsea watches. She doesn't get it when she sees Jeremy do something like that and Stephanie just stands there. Nick doesn't care. He suggests going up and catching some sleep.

"Sweet dreams," says Chelsea.

"You're the best," says Nick, "the best what is up for debate." He kisses her and leaves.

Stephanie stews. She comes over to Chelsea and says she can explain. "What," asks Chelsea, "deep sea diving with Max or how your other boyfriend is flirting with that girl and you aren't doing anything about it?"

Nursie lectures the naughty couple and leaves. Sami jumps in with Lucas. He tells her he has rubbery legs.

"It's from the hypothermia," says Sami.

"No," says Lucas, "The Samithermia." Sami puts his pressure stockings on. Smooch.

EJ walks in, "Lucas, I'm glad to see you're feeling better." He says he's there to talk about the vendetta. He claims he found a way to end it.

Max walks into the casino and sees Jeremy and Ilsa. A woman bumps into him and he helps pick up the things she spilled out of her purse. The woman says this is her first time in Vegas. Max introduces himself. Her name is Jenna Powers. She's there for a conference, but decided to skip the seminar and have some fun, just like we all do when we're at a conference. Max offers to buy her a drink. She orders a vodka gimlet with a "kiss" of lime. Jenna makes a phone call while Max is at the bar.

EJ thinks Andre has the folio with the conditions for ending the vendetta. Lucas mouth goes into gear. He rants and tells Sami she can't get involved with this. Sami reminds him she already is.

EJ says Andre will have to get the folio to Stefano. The cops are watching him. Stefano will have to use a courier to get the folio so he won't be implicated. Sami thinks they have to figure out who the courier will be. EJ says he knows the courier is Kate.

Nick is in a robe. He opens the door to the room. A man stands there with Artemis and DeMarquette. If the kids were smiling any wider, you'd need that new 46" plasma you've been thinking about getting. The man says, "I was asked to deliver these children to their daddy."

Jenna talks into her phone, "I have what you asked for. What do you want me to do with him?"

Lucas insists Saint Kate can't be in cahoots with Stefano. EJ wonders if that's the case, why she is so flush with cash suddenly, "Where did she get it?" Lucas speculates. EJ says, "I think maybe she got it from Stefano for services rendered."

Lucas loses his cool. Sami tries to back him off. Lucas rants, "Her days of doing 'favors' for money are over!"

"If you say so," says EJ. He still thinks Kate is the courier. Sami thinks they have to intercept Kate. Lucas asks if Sami is buying into this. Sami thinks Lucas should grab a bite of reality. Lucas says there is no way in hell Kate would hook up with Stefano. Sami says this isn't about his mom. She plays her trump card – the twins, "If there is a chance for them we have to act fast."

Lucas does a 180, "Yeah, right. Fine!" He turns to EJ, "What the hell you want us to do." Pan in on EJ.


Previews
========

Jenna asks, "What if I really was propositioning you that way? What then Mr. Max?"

Stephanie tells Jeremy, "I'm tired of sitting alone at a bar while you are off doing business. How about making me a priority for once?"

Adrienne strokes Patch's cheek and says, "It's about being the kind of father we never had. The kind of father you wanted ever since you were a little boy."

Bo says, "You're settin' yourself up as bait." Roman says, "I know what the stakes are." Bo says, "Yeah. Your life."

The No-Tell Motel

We pan in on yummy hospital food. Lucas wonders what the white stuff is on his chicken. Sami offers to make a pizza run. "Just as long as you aren't cooking," says Lucas. He wants her to stay, but they don't have a rollout bed yet. She squeezes in with him.

Nurse Crimmins walks into the room and booms, "What do you think this is, the No-Tell Motel?"

Stephanie and Chelsea are back in Vegas in the hot tub. Stephanie says she has been hit-on before but the guy on the plane gave her a good scare. She can't believe what Max did, "It was kind of nice."

Max asks Jeremy where Rawlings is. They argue about the caper. Jeremy claims he just had no idea what was going on. He explains to Max how he transported the women. They were on the other flight he chartered, "But at least we made a nice profit."

"It's dirty money," grumbles Max.

Rawlings shows up, "How many we got coming in tonight?"

"None," says Jeremy, "Sorry man, we're out."

Anna and Tony are at the hospital to visit Roman, but Roman isn't in his room. She thinks they should take the gift to his house in person. Tony suggests taking it on the way to dinner. Just say the word dinner, and you have Anna's attention. Roman walks in, "Don't mind me you, two." Anna asks how Roman is doing. He tells her the knife wound is just about healed. Other wounds are wide-open, though.

Nurse Crimmins barks out the rules, "Suppose there was an emergency and your husband had a setback?" Sami tells her they wouldn't have to be sharing a bed if she had been able to track down a rollaway bed. Lucas asks her to go check to see if she can find one. "I knew I should have called in sick today," snorts Crimmins. She turns and leaves.

Sami accuses Lucas of flirting with Crimmins. She mocks the nurse, "I'll bet she hasn't seen any action for years!"

"What," asks Lucas, "Has she been watching DOOL?" He wants to go back to more constructive things.

Chelsea says Max would have done the same thing for any girl, "Don't read anything into it. Max was like that when I was dating him."

"Why do you think I might want to hook up with Max," asks Stephanie.

"Well," asks Chelsea, "Would Jeremy do anything like that for you?"

Rawlings thinks this must be a joke. "Am I laughing," asks Max. He wants the girls brought there.

"What are you smoking, Brady," asks Rawlings.

"Make it happen," orders Max.

Rawlings sneers, "Are you funny or just stupid?"

"Yes."

Max and Rawlings start to get into it, but Jeremy breaks them up. Rawlings says they can't bail on him. Max threatens to call the cops. Rawlings calls his bluff. He says they would be just as guilty as him. Max wants the crew of hotties there ASAP. Rawlings leaves.

"If we're not going to bring cops into it, we have to do this ourselves," says Max.

Chelsea thinks Stephanie needs to be honest with herself about Jeremy. Stephanie chews her nails, "What if you are right? What if he is cheating? I couldn't stand it."

Roman is back in bed. He says he's in pain but not from the knife wound. Tony is amazed at medical progress since he was on the island. He decides to wait outside while Roman and Anna talk things out. Roman admires the fruit basket, "Is that what you give when you decide to dump a guy?"

Tony meets Stefano in the hallway, "You don't look so good. Are you about to die?"

Sami gives Lucas a backrub. He wonders how she got to be so good at it. She tells him about Sven. He has been giving her pregnancy massages at the spa, and that's where she picked it up, "He turns me into jelly in 10 minutes." Lucas insists that's his job. They start jellin'. Lucas says he wants Sami to stop going after Stefano. Sami claims she has to. She feels a connection with Colleen. Lucas doesn't want her hurting herself. Sami says she can make thinks right for Colleen, "She's calling to me. She wants me to stand up the way she would have."

Lucas asks, "You gonna fight this battle? What – are you gonna fight it to the death?"

"So it's official," says Roman, "You and Tony. I thought we had a good thing going." She reminds him he disappeared on her the morning after. She thinks they both took the easy way out.

Roman says, "There is an Australian saying I like – 'No worries, mate.' I have a ball game to watch."

Rolf tells Tony Stefano has taken a turn for the worse. Stefano thinks Tony could not care less. Tony claims he does care. Stefano doesn't buy it. Tony asks what the vendetta has gained Stefano, "It has made the Bradys stronger, and you are alone."

Lucas and Sami keep up the nonsense. He couldn't handle it if anything happened to her. "Without you," he says, "I wouldn't be there to do this..." He moves in.

Chelsea thinks Stephanie should talk to Jeremy. Stephanie doesn't want her to say anything to anyone. Stephanie tells her about his rejecting her idea of moving in together. "Maybe he does have a girl and that's why," suggests Chelsea, "I think you should talk to him."

Stephanie says Jeremy can talk his way out of anything, "He has an answer for everything." Chelsea says Nick and her have had trust issues, too, but now they are in a good place. She hears a knock at the door and leaves to answer it. Stephanie swills her beer.

Nick is at the door. China Lee stands behind him with her little brats and nags. She introduces Artemis and Dee, "Say hi to your daddy's friend."

Max tells Jeremy to make some calls and round up the herd. Jeremy insists it's impossible. They argue. Max slips up, "Either you get on board or I go straight to Jett..."

"What did you say," asks Jeremy, "What's Carver got to do with this?"

Lucas says they have to stop in case nurse Ratchet comes back in. Sami suggests putting a tie on the door. Lucas suggests maybe locking it would be more effective. Sami goes over to the door but finds there is no lock. She scoots the food tray over lock the door and attacks him.

China Lee's little brats use the couch for a trampoline. Chelsea wonders if China Lee has been pumping them full of caffeine. China tees off on Nick, "You gonna let this skinny white girl accuse me of drugging our kids? Don't you want to spend some time with your kids?"

Nick fishes a couple pieces of paper out of the desk and sends the brats to the bedroom to make paper airplanes. Once they skedaddle he tells China, "You shouldn't confuse them like that. This marriage is over. We are getting an annulment tonight." The kids run back into the living room with perfect little paper airplanes that look like a Boeing engineer made them. He sends them all down to the pool. The kids drag China Lee out.

Nick tells Chelsea he doesn't have $25 grand yet, but he's going back to the blackjack table.

Max says he brought Jett up because he thought Jeremy was tight with Jett. Jeremy says for all he knows, Jett could be a cop. "I don't think so," says Max as he gives a nervous laugh. Max decides to head for the hotel. Jeremy turns around and slams the wall with his fist. Wall 1 – Jeremy 0. Jeremy picks up the pieces of his hand and leaves. Jett comes out and stares.

Chelsea thinks there must be a better way for Nick to get the money. She asks about the money he won and wonders if it would be weird to ask for part of it back. He says it would be really weird, and tells her he has three thousand dollars from cashing in a life insurance policy. Max shows up. He sees Stephanie in the hot tub and goes to talk to her. Chelsea kisses Max for luck.

Anna turns off the game. She apologies for hurting Roman but says she can't keep stringing him along. Roman says, "It's closed – THE END." Anna says she loves him. He gets it. She loves him but not like she loves Tony.

Anna asks, "If Marlena would leave John and come back to you would you drop everything for her?"

"Hard to tell," snorts Roman. Translation: Goodbye Anna, hello Marlena.

"See," says Anna, "You know where I'm coming from." Roman says he wants Anna to be happy but he guarantees Tony will not stick around for her. Anna whimpers.

A doctor tells Rolf what to do for Stefano. Stefano gets angry that the doctor is talking to Rolf instead of him, and wants the doctor to talk to him directly. They argue and the doctor leaves.

Tony says the writing is on the wall, "Time is up. I think you should live out your days with dignity by turning Andre in and ending the vendetta."

Nick and Chelsea kiss. Nick thinks that's enough luck for a lifetime. Chelsea says she had an ulterior motive – to get him to stay and find an empty bed, "Are you up for it?"

CENSORED! DO NOT CLICK ON THIS LINK!

Max joins Stephanie. She invites him in. He says he shouldn't. She says she's OK thanks to him. He's glad he could help. He starts to go but she stops him from leaving.

Lucas' monitor beeps as he and Sami go at it. Nurses rush to the rescue! The food tray goes flying. Lucas tries to tell them it's a false alarm. Sami claims she was trying to cover him and increase his body temperature.

Frau Crimmins steps in, "Zo! You zink you can iknore my orderz, eh? I guezz I haft to remint you who izz in charche!".

Tony encourages Stefano to turn in Andre. Stefano wonders why he would do that, "Andre has proven his loyalty. The key... Andre got everything from the tabernacle, so the vendetta will never end. Not until I can destroy every damn Brady who roams this earth."

Tony asks, "OMG! You're even going to kill the Brady Bunch?"

Lucas machines are calm. The room is dark. Sami lies beside Lucas on a rollaway. "Goodnight Sami," says Lucas.

"Goodnight Lucas," says Sami.

"Goodnight nurse Crimmins," says Lucas.

Nurse Crimmins sits in a chair beside them looking over the top of her glasses.

From the distance a voice cries, "Goodnight John-Boy." It seems the No-Tell Motel is closed.

Anna accuses Roman of trying to hurt her. She insists Tony will not leave her. Roman reminds her of Lola and Lila, "Tony was, is and always will be a womanizer." Roman says if she ever wants to spend time with a guy she can trust and who will treat her the way she deserves, then she should call, "In the meantime, I have a ballgame to watch."

Tony says Andre will be Stefano's downfall. Stefano tells Rolf he wants to go. They leave. Tony eyes a nurse and follows her as she walks to the nurses' station. Anna comes out and sees him leering. He takes her in his arms.

Nick says Chelsea is killing him. He apologizes but says he is doing this for them. If he doesn't get rid of China Lee, where does that leave them? She offers to go with him. He thinks she would be a distraction, "Especially in that bikini. You'd scare the clientele." She says she will wait for him.

Nick leaves with his money. He passes Jett in the hallway and says hi, but he can't talk now, "Sorry, I'm on my way to a divorce."

Jeremy comes up to Jett in the hallway. He asks what's up, "See, I think we got a little problem here, Jett. Somebody's not exactly being straight with me."

Jett asks, "So, you're accusing me of being gay?"

Chelsea watches Max and Stephanie and then leaves. Stephanie says most guys wouldn't have done that especially for an ex, "Staying friends is a bunch of bull, but somehow you and I made it work." He moves in. It's a hot time in the old hot tub tonight.

Maurice "The Rocket" Richard - Pronounced Risharde - (August 4, 1921 – May 27, 2000) was a professional hockey player who played for the Montreal Canadiens from 1942 to 1960. The "Rocket" was the most prolific goal-scorer of his era, achieving the fabled feat of 50 goals in 50 games. His brother, Henri Richard (born February 29, 1936 in Montreal, Quebec) played center with the Montreal Canadiens in the National Hockey League (NHL) from 1955 to 1975. Henri was fifteen years his brother's junior and much smaller, thereby earning him the nickname "The Pocket-Rocket." Many times he was simply called, "Pocket." It is the only known occurrence of any person ever having the name "Pocket" that made sense.

Previews
========

Nick tells Chelsea, "I don't have a nickel to my name. China Lee signed the annulment papers. We're free."

Jeremy asks, "Are you a cop, Carver? Are you selling me out here?"

EJ asks, "The contents of this vault... this could end the vendetta?" Andre says, "On the contrary. The contents are so devastating the Bradys would destroy the folio and everything in it, letting the vendetta go on indefinitely rather than expose it to the light of day."

I Promise Not To Tinkle On Myself

Kayla goes through baby clothes. Patch comes in with Pocket, "Man, there were a bunch of granny types down there playing bridge. They wouldn't let us leave."

"Granny types," asks Kayla.

"Yeah," says Patch, "They were only a few years younger than we are. Pocket is a chick magnet." Kayla is glad to see them bonding.

Steve suggests taking Pocket down to the Cheatin' Heart and teaching him how to shoot some pool. "Oh, I'm sure that will go over well," says Kayla.

"Hey, every pool table could use an extra Pocket," says Steve.

The clothes she is rummaging through are Stephanie's. She thinks maybe some of it will fit Pocket. Patch vetoes it. He wants footballs and baseballs instead of dresses. Kayla finds some jammies. That doesn't go over well with Steve. He speaks for pocket, "He's pissed."

"Oh, I doubt if it's that bad," says Kayla.

"No," says Steve, "I mean he's all wet." They bicker about who should go change the diaper. Kayla wins. On the way to the back room, Patch says, "Let me tell you something, son. These women, they might be pretty, but boy can they be bossy."

Kayla asks, "Did he just call you son?"

Touch the sky flies. On the plane, Mr. Lowell compliments Stephanie on her flight attendant skills, "I'll bet you do a lot of things well." He pulls her onto his lap. She resists. "Customer service just ain't what it used to be," says Lowell.

Stephanie wiggles away from him. She runs back and tells Chelsea what happened, "He was groping me."

"So what," says Chelsea, "You let Jeremy treat you like that all the time."

Jett and Max sit together. "What's up," asks Max.

"Your time," says Jett. He flashes his badge, "Look, bro, I'm a cop and you're in serious heat."

EJ rants when looks into Lucas' room and sees Lucas and Sami together, "Instead of consoling Sami on the death of Lucas, I saved him again. I'm almost incompetent enough to be a Salem cop."

Inside the room, Roman tries to talk about the situation, but Sami is distracted. She just wants Lucas to wake up. Roman decides to go check things out. Sami opens the door and he wheels out.

Outside, Roman finds Kate. He tells her Lucas will be fine. He says it's a good thing Sami and EJ got there when they did. Kate thinks EJ must be a hero. "Sami did her part, too," says Roman.

"Yes...," says an insincere Kate, "Thank God for Sami." She goes into the room.

EJ contemplates and says to himself, "Hero, eh? That's a card I have yet to play." He hauls out his cell phone and asks for the number of channel six news.

Max says Jett should have let him know he's a cop when he was asked to invest. He swears he has told Jett everything. Jett thinks there is more to it. He says Jeremy is in too deep. There is no way he is walking, but Max still can.

Stephanie says Jeremy is no way like the creep out front. Chelsea runs through a laundry list of Jeremy's bad habits. Stephanie tries a low blow, "He beats the hell out of Nick."

Patch changes Pocket's diaper. He yells out to Kayla and asks what the paste is for. Kayla says, "Wow. It has been a long time since you did this, hasn't it? Oh, and I forgot to tell you, when you change a boy's diaper and it hits the air..."

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH." Patch brings Pocket out, "What were you going to say?"

Kayla laughs, "I was going to say when the ratings get really bad on a show and they are totally desperate, they resort to bathroom humor."

Kate strokes Lucas' head and he magically wakes up. Sami welcomes him back. Lucas says he is cold. Kate goes for a blanket. Sami fills him in on what happened. She tells him he got a text message and he thought it was from Kate. Lucas doesn't remember any of it. Then he flashes back to the truck. He says he thought Kate was inside, but he went in to save her anyway and got locked in. Sami tells him about banging on the door. Lucas asks, "You were there? Did you save me?" Sami nods.

Kate breaks in, "No, actually EJ saved you."

Lucas looks up, "EJ?"

That's EJ's cue. He enters with the news crew, sits on the bed and puts his arm around Lucas. The news team goes into action.

Max says he shouldn't have gotten hooked up in this and he wouldn't have if Jett had been straight with him. Jett thinks he is decent and got roped into something he didn't understand.

"Good," says Max, "Now I'm stupid, too."

"Yes," says Jett, "But fortunately for you, stupidity isn't a crime. Otherwise, you'd be looking at some serious jail time. Take the lifeline I'm offering."

EJ tells the people out in TV-Land Sami deserves the accolades. He has her tell what happened. Sami runs through it. Kate interrupts. Lucas tells Kate to back of and let Sami tell the story. Sami goes on but says the credit should go to EJ, "If it weren't for you my twins would have to grow up without a father."

The news crew wants a shot of Sami and EJ hugging. They oblige. The cameraman asks them to do it again, "This time, like you mean it." One more hug...

Newsman Gonzalez gets in Lucas' face and asks if he is grateful to EJ. Lucas is sarcastic, "Oh, 'grateful' doesn't even describe how I feel about him."

EJ escorts the news crew out. Lucas thinks EJ is always in the right place at the right time. He thinks it's too big a coincidence. He wants to find out who left the text message.

EJ returns. He tells them he overheard what Lucas said, "It's obvious who is behind this. I am certain Andre did it. He's made attempts on your life and Roman's and I'm concerned Sami may be next."

Kayla finds Bathato the teddy bear. Stephanie loved him. Pocket screams. Kayla jams a bottle in his mouth. Kayla remembers when Stephanie dropped Bathato in a puddle and cried last week. She reminisces about Stephanie growing up. She wishes Patch could have been there. So does he. He wishes fussy little Pocket weren't right now. Pocket rages. Kayla jams the bottle farther down his throat. Steve watches.

Max thinks this is blackmail. He isn't talking, "I am not a narc." Jett says Jeremy is going to jail. The question is whether Max is joining him.

Chelsea tells Stephanie not to talk that way about Nick. She tells her how Nick told off China last night. "Wow," says Stephanie, "Nick chewed out a girl. Who needs Superman when Nick is around?"

Jett interrupts. Stephanie storms out. "Good thing I got here before the bloodshed," says Jett. He wants to talk.

Sami thinks EJ has a point. Lucas thinks the Andre theory is bull. Lucas asks what about EJ, "Where were you when the text message came through?" EJ says he was in a conference call to Tokyo. He asks Lucas why he would lure him in just to save him. Sami backs up EJ. EJ says someone needs to take care of Sami with Andre on the loose. Lucas insists he can take care of Sami.

"You can't even take care of yourself," says EJ. That does it. Lucas wants him out. Sami tells EJ not to push. She decides to stay in Lucas room. She starts to go get a bed from the floor nurse. Lucas asks Kate to get it instead. If they can't come up with a bed, Sami can sleep on the lead balloon that comes crashing down.

Kate leaves. EJ doesn't think it is wise for Sami to stay. Kate comes back and announces there are no beds available. Lucas decides that's OK. Sami can snuggle up with him.

Kate has a cow, "Oh God!"

EJ has a solution. He invites Sami to stay with him.

Kayla speaks for Pocket, "He says there are a lot of good times ahead."

Patch tells her to slow down, "This isn't permanent." Kayla insists she isn't trying to replace Stephanie with Pocket, even though when the first one is a lemon, it's not a bad idea to trade it in for a newer model. Patch says it's tough to come to the realization her little girl doesn't need her anymore.

Jeremy tells Max Rawlings will be there when they land, "No cops, right?"

"No cops," says Max.

Jett admits he could have handled things a little better. Chelsea says he could have told her. "Why do this," says Jett, "We're friends."

"We were," says Chelsea. Lucas is toasty warm compared to her.

Stephanie serves Lowell. He asks her to check the vent. She reaches up to do it and Lowell leers. She says the vent is working fine, and starts to leave. He asks her to grab a bite when they get to Vegas, "Do you like sushi?"

"Yes," says Stephanie, "And maybe afterwards we can go up to your room for a little dessert."

Lowell is into it, "Baby, you know it!"

"In your dreams," says Stephanie. She dumps his tray of food into his lap.

EJ guarantees Sami's safety. Lucas says she would be safer in a room full of rabid bats. Kate thinks maybe EJ has a point. Lucas accuses her of having an agenda. Sami insists she will sleep on the floor if she has to.

EJ takes Sami's arm, "Come home with me and I'll take care of you." Lucas has a conniption. He flings the covers off and jumps out of bed. The legs don't work. Lucas falls into a heap on the floor, "My legs! I can't feel them!"

Kayla has gagged Pocket and put him to bed. She says it was tough when Stephanie left the nest. She thinks it would have been easier if she knew Patch was coming back. She always hoped Steve would just walk through the door and things would go back to the way they were, "Those damn DiMeras!"

Steve insists things are better now. He thinks they are lucky. Kayla agrees. He says Pocket won't make up for what they lost.

Lowell goes off the deep end. Stephanie insists it was an accident. Chelsea comes up to help and Lowell swats at her. Chelsea tells Stephanie she needs to see her in the galley right away. Lowell says Stephanie isn't going anywhere. He yanks her into the seat next to him.

That brings SuperMax to the rescue. Max beats the stuffing out of him as Lowell yells, "Take it easy! Take it easy!" Stephanie and Chelsea scatter like cockroaches in a lighted room.

Kate runs for a doctor. Lucas says he can't feel his legs. He doesn't want EJ to come near him though. A doctor comes in and orders everyone out.

EJ starts to usher Sami out and Lucas yells, "Get your hands off my wife!"

Patch chucks the girly outfits. Kayla was saving them for a quilt for Stephanie. Patch thinks Kayla is really something. Smooch. "I'm going to hit the head," says Patch, "I promise not to tinkle on myself."

Pocket cries in the background. Kayla finds something in the pile of clothes, "YES!" Pocket cries again and Patch asks her to take care of it.

Sami tells EJ to go home. Kate tells Sami to go get some rest. They argue about where Sami should stay. Roman interrupts, "EJ, She said forget it. When Sami says no she means no."

The doctor comes out. He wants to discuss Lucas' condition.

Jett separates Max and Lowell. Jeremy comes out, "Baby, did this guy put his hands on you?" Jeremy goes for Lowell, but Jett stops him. Lowell threatens to sue and Jett hauls him off.

Jeremy asks Stephanie if she is OK. She says, "If it weren't for Max I wouldn't be."

Lowell tells Jett this is all a misunderstanding. Jett advises him to get a lawyer and cuffs him, "You're on ice the rest of the flight."

Jeremy meets Jett in the kitchen, "You're carrying cuffs now? Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

"Your fly is open," says Jett.

Kayla sings Hush Kittle Baby. She sings to Pocket, too. Pocket starts to cry and once again she jams the pacifier down his throat. Patch complains about her wanting to dress him like a girl. Kayla thinks she has something that will change that. She dangles pocket in front of Patch and shows him his new outfit which says, "DADDY."

Chelsea tells Stephanie she should press charges. Stephanie just wants to forget it, "Thank God for Max. He was really great."

Jett tells Jeremy the cuffs are Abe's. He always brings them in case they run into a nut job like Lowell. Jeremy says it was good thinking. He suggests someone had better go fly the plane. Bold new concept. On the way to the cabin, Jett tells Max he will come to him in Vegas. Jeremy stares.

The doctor says Lucas will be fine. Who'da guessed it? Sami goes in to see him. Roman stops EJ from following her, I've been thinking."

"We're in trouble now," says EJ.

Roman goes on, "Maybe Andre was behind the attack, but it seems the man who has the most to gain by Lucas death is you, EJ." EJ insists he was the one who brought about Lucas' rescue. Roman is skeptical. He's going to keep an eye on EJ.

"Oh, I feel so much safer," says EJ. Roman tells Kate he's glad her son is OK and leaves.

Kate tells EJ, "If you had anything to do with this I will strangle you with my own hands." She leaves.

EJ says to himself, "I saved his life. Whatever." He throws his hands up in disgust. FF.


Previews
========

Jeremy says, "See, I think we got a little problem here, Jett. Somebody's not exactly being straight with me."

Stefano tells Andre/Tony, "The vendetta will never end. Not until I can destroy every damn Brady who roams this earth."

Lucas asks Sami, "You gonna fight this battle? What – are you gonna fight it to the death?"

Max, Stephanie, eyes wide shut, mouths wide open.

Ka-Ching!

Steve and Kayla stand in their hallway with Pocket. "We talked about this, Sweetness, remember," asks Steve.

"How could anyone forget," asks Kayla, "We beat that poor dead horse to a pulp."

They find the door open. Patch sneaks in and finds Randall. Baby Depot got there early and he's setting up. Patch tips him and Randall leaves. Kayla thinks they sure got the order there quickly. She reminds Steve it's only temporary, so she only bought several thousand dollars of baby paraphernalia instead of really splurging. He says he knows her and she won't be able to let Cufflink go.

Jeremy is on the phone trying to connect to Mike. He can't get a connection. Stephanie walks up. She asks if something is wrong, "You have to ask," snorts Jeremy, "The cops are after me. Why is this happening? I'm the target of a witch-hunt. My friends are turning their backs and my parents are too busy to take my calls. I've got nothing."

Nothing stares, "That's not true. You've got me. I'm not going anywhere."

Chelsea stares into a computer at the pub, "OMG, it really is true."

Nick walks in with good news, "Mickey says the marriage doesn't mean anything unless China can prove an actually wedding took place."

Chelsea reminds Nick the last time Mickey gave accurate legal advice was during the Scopes Monkey Trial, "Take a look at this," says Chelsea.

Bo tells Hope he rummaged through the kid's backpack, "I found a cheap pickup."

Hope asks, "What? Kate followed us to the church?"

"No," says Bo, "It's a toy pickup truck. It has 'DOOL' written on the side panel."

"What does that mean," asks Hope.

"DOOL," says Bo, "It's a bomb!" Bo runs for the door with the toy truck.

Hope screams, "Bo! Bo!" Andre watches in the background.

Bo puts the truck into a 55-gallon tub full of water and cowers. He tells Hope to stay inside. He insists he's fine. Hope goes back to the tabernacle and tries the key. Andre sneaks in and watches.

Kayla shushes Inseam. Patch is restless. He insists he is OK with this. He just wants to know they are on the same page. He's worried about her. He wonders what will happen when CPS comes to pick their pocket. He wonders if she can deal with it.

Jeremy says Stephanie is really something. He doesn't deserve her. She loves him and is there for him. He says he can't talk about what he is up to. He just wanted to find an easier way than his parent's way. He grew up watching them work like dogs. He thinks it was noble but they should have been living better, like others there, rich Americans. The kids he ran around with had everything and their parents weren't killing themselves to get it. He decided life shouldn't be that hard. He decided to find an easier way.

"Looks like the easier way just got more difficult," says Stephanie. She says she has to go take care of a few things and will be there for him when he wants to tell her the rest. She leaves.

Chelsea shows Nick the videos of his wedding on the DVD China gave her. He thinks he isn't acting normal as he watches, "Maybe I didn't say, 'I do.'"

Chelsea says, "I don't think the preacher, in his sequined glory, would have pronounced you man and wife if you didn't. It looks like I am fooling around with a married man."

"Just when do we get to the fooling around part," asks Nick.

Bo pulls the toy truck out of the water filled barrel. He holds it up to his ear, "OK," he says, "If it blows my brains out, it's a bomb. If it doesn't blow up... I still won't have any brains." After holding it up to his ear for a long enough time to blow him to kingdom come, he says, "It's a damn dud. What is going on?"

Hope tries the key and finally gets it to work. She opens the tabernacle and pulls out a portfolio. "I'll take that," says Andre.

Nick doesn't remember any part of the wedding. Chelsea reminds him he was acting like he was out of it in Vegas. China walks into the pub and poses at the door.

Jeremy has come to see Max. Max tells him to take a hike. Jeremy says he is desperate.

Kayla insists she will be OK when Buttonhole leaves. Patch is still worried. Kayla reminds him she has been through this before. He reminds her she was devastated when Benjy left. Collar cries and Kayla gets up and tends to him.

Andre and Hope struggle. Hope tosses the package to Bo. Andre holds a knife up to Hope's throat, "Give me the folio, Bo!"

China comes to Nick and Chelsea's table and sits down, "How's a bout a big smooch for your wife? Was I the perfect bride, or what?"

"Bride of Satan," says Chelsea. China asks for time alone with Nick. Chelsea doesn't think that's a good idea. China shows Nick crayon drawings from his new stepsons. "To our new daddy." Chelsea says she knows what China is doing. She's working a con.

"In this case," says China, "What happened in Vegas didn't stay in Vegas. We're legally married." Chelsea rants, but Nick stops her.

Jeremy says he will tell Max everything if Max will help him. Max is sarcastic. Jeremy insists Max is in as deep as he is. Max says Chelsea and Jett know Jeremy is a criminal, too, and Stephanie will find out.

Jeremy panics and comes clean, "The trunks of designer knockoffs... That was just a cover for what I'm really doing. I've been smuggling women into the country from eastern Europe."

Kayla bounces Cuff. She remembers they forgot to get formula. Patch suggests ordering in, "How about Indian." Kayla remembers the couple downstairs has a newborn and she goes to borrow some formula. Patch rams a pacifier into Trouser's mouth to shut him up. He tells him this is temporary. He insists they won't let him down. Stephanie stands in the doorway and stares.

Bo hesitates. Andre repeats his order, "Give me the folio or I will kill Hope!"

Bo freezes. Andre asks, "What are you waiting for?"

"I'm thinking it over," says Bo.

Hope struggles. She taunts Andre about not really being Stefano's son. Andre shouts, "Give me the folio or she dies! One... two... three..."

Bo lays the folio on the floor and kicks it over to Andre. He stoops and has Hope pick it up. Bo tells him to let her go. Andre doesn't think so, "Maybe she'll ensure a good escape. I think she and I make a nice couple, don't you?"

Father Wallace interrupts. Andre tells him to pray for them and escapes. He leaves Hope at the door. Hope contemplates running after him but, hey, it's raining and she's wearing her new shoes.

Chelsea is upset. She thinks Nick is defending China. Nick wants to run with it. He says he's sure China is a reasonable woman. He says he doesn't remember the wedding, "I was a little out of it. I was stunned when a bomb went off – long story." China asks for a doctor's note. Nick says he didn't see a doctor. He suggests an annulment.

"I was thinking more along the lines of a lawsuit," says China, "Ka-ching!"

Ilsa was one of the women Jeremy smuggled, "They were all young and attractive."

"Thank God," says Max, "Chelsea wasn't involved."

Jeremy says he didn't really know what was going on. Rawlings said the women were desperate and were looking for better lives. He did it for the money but he didn't know what was going on. He insists he found them jobs.

"Yeah," says Max, "Servicing old drunks."

"They weren't just forced to turn tricks," says Jeremy, "They were getting hurt."

Max goes after him, "I'm gonna kill you!"

Stephanie says she came for the rest of her stuff. Patch tells her about Sleeve. They decided to take him in, "It's just for a few days.

Stephanie is speechless. Thank God for small favors. "I don't know what to say."

Kayla walks in, "How about good luck?"

"How come you never told me," asks the snot.

"If you still lived here, we could have," says Kayla. Stephanie wonders where Collar will sleep. She notices the only spare room will be hers. Patch says they will leave her room alone and put the crib in their room.

"I hope parenthood works out for you this time," says the snot. A referee flags her for unsportsmanlike conduct.

Kayla gets in her face, "Stop! Tell me what has happened with you."

China threatens to sue Nick for abandonment, pain and suffering. Nick says he will show her pain and suffering. He swears she picked the wrong guy to mess with. Chelsea beams.

Jeremy says he was an idiot but doesn't deserve to go to jail. He wants Max' help. He claims he lied when he said he slept with Ilsa.

"Who did sleep with her," asks Max.

"The guy the police are really after," says Jeremy, "Andre DiMera."

Bo wanders in the rain looking for Andre.

Andre watches and thinks, "Hope was wrong. I am Stefano's son and you and your brother are about to find out what that mans." He runs up behind Bo and skewers him.

Hope apologies to father Wallace for breaking into the tabernacle. Father Wallace says the tabernacle hasn't been used in decades. They thought it was empty. Bo comes in and says Andre got away. His arm is cut, but he insists it is just a scratch. Not nearly as damaging as falling off a motorcycle. Father Wallace goes for bandages. Bo is dejected. He says they lost the one thing that could end the vendetta. He thinks they should keep it to themselves that Andre followed them because that piece of information will come in handy later. They decide to tell Roman and Abe but no one else. He thinks they will never know what was in the tabernacle.

Kayla insists they love Stephanie, but she doesn't recognize her daughter any more. She's just not the same person after returning from Dayton. She has changed and not for the better. This has nothing to do with Jeremy. Kayla remembers they were so close when it was just the two of them.

Stephanie says it's not easy to turn her back. But thinks maybe it's better if she leaves. She huffs out. Patch follows. He catches up to her out in the hall, "Wait! You are my baby. You're just as special as that kid in there. I promise, we'll give you a special, idiotic name, too. How about Bra Strap? He remembers the tiny little thing he held in his arms. When he held her he never felt so much love. He still feels it, "You're my little Sweetness. No one could ever replace you but, by God, we'll keep trying."

Max says he should have known the DiMeras were involved. Max wonders why Jeremy didn't come clean before. Jeremy says that's because Andre threatened him. He begs Max for help. Rawlings is Andre's detail man. Max says if Jeremy wants help, he'll get it for him. He dials his phone. He says he's calling his brothers, "We're going to the cops."

Jeremy stops him, "There has to be another way. I'm begging you."

"You want another way," asks Max, "You won't like it."

Nick says he has been blackmailed twice and that's enough for him. He puts his arm around Chelsea and says, "We plan to spend all the Days Of Our Lives together, and no money grubbing, opportunistic tramp from Vegas is gonna get in the way of that."

"You're wrong about me," says China, "I'm not from Vegas."

"You want to play hardball," says Nick, "I'm ready."

"Props to whatever movie you ripped that speech off from," says China, "Your hands are shaking. Give me what I want and I'll go away. $25 grand ought to do it. My half of the winnings from Vegas, or I'll have child services on this deadbeat dad like white on rice. I'm not a patient woman." She leaves.

Nick turns to Chelsea, "I now what you're thinking..." She interrupts with a kiss. "Or maybe not," says Nick.

Chelsea says that was for the real Nick finally standing up for himself, "It was kinda hot."

Max suggests going to Rawlings and having him shut the business down. Jeremy says Rawlings won't listen. He agrees to do his best, but makes Max promise he won't say anything to Stephanie, "I don't know who I can trust. Not even you."

"You got a choice," asks Max.

"Not that I can think of," says Jeremy, "You are the one guy who can save all of us." Translation: they're doomed.

Patch and Stephanie share a tender but tedious moment. "You can't expect me to get that excited over the first guy you bring home," says Patch.

"He's not my first," says Stephanie.

"Well he's mine," says Patch. They love each other. She will get the rest of her stuff later and will come by every now and then and change a diaper or two.

He goes inside to find Kayla and Belt bonding.

Bo has no idea how Andre is getting back to Salem. He figures they have to find him before he gets the folio to Stefano, "My family's lives are depending on it." Pan in on Hope.


Previews
========

Patch holds Pocket and says, "Let me tell you something, son. These women, they might be pretty, but boy can they be bossy." Kayla asks, "Did he just call you son?"

There is a ruckus on the Touch The Sky plane. Max beats the stuffing out of some guy as the guy yells, "Take it easy! Take it easy!" Stephanie and Chelsea run off.

Jeremy asks Jett, "You're carrying cops now? Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

Lucas asks, "You were there? Did you save me?" Sami nods. Kate breaks in, "No actually EJ saved you." Lucas looks up, "EJ?"

Claire steps out of her vehicle, surveys the barren landscape and says, "That's one small step for man..."

La Crème de la Crud

We don't do too many moving pictures. They are harder to do than the regular pictures and there are bandwidth issues we won't bore you with. However, every once in a while we come up with a moving image and they are well received. So our blue ribbon panel (of one) has reached back into the vault and come up with the top 10 moving pix over the past year or so, la crème de la crud, so to speak. This was fun to do. We hope you have as much fun looking at them again:

10. We have a picture of just about everyone in Salem getting his or her kisser slapped, but we thought it was special when Stefano himself hauled off and whacked EJ a good one upside the haid:



9. Chelsea shows her displeasure at Nick after finding out the fact he had an "other self" wasn't just because he had multiple personality disorder. Nick is a lightweight, so Chelsea had to step up from the quarkweight division for this fight:



8. Things got hot a few months ago when Max and Stephanie got together. Unfortunately, all the fireworks were on the racetrack:



7. Sami self-medicates her bipolar condition after crashing Carrie and Austin's wedding and finding out John and Marlena were tying the knot, too:



6. Kayla will open the door for anyone, including the infamous Land Shark:



5. Marlena supports the nefarious Alex North over John. Alex smirks. John retaliates by giving North his Mandible Mambo Maneuver:



4. John's piloting skills are tested as he and Marlena fly through a storm on the way to Canada, eh? Instead of using the barf bag like a normal person, Marlena jumps out of the plane and practically lands on top of Smokey Robinson:



3. Lucas gets the best of Kate and EJ in a way that only Lucas is capable of by gassing them with a fire extinguisher:



2. Lucas settles his differences with EJ by fixing his wagon. Or should we say painting his wagon. (Note: in the interest of equal time, we attempted to include a picture of Lucas acting like an adult, but it turns out Lucas has never been observed acting like an adult.):



Drum roll... And the #1 moving picture for 2007 is...

1. OK. Assume your daughter is missing and may even be dead. You are together with your spouse trying to console each other. Your lives are nearly devastated. What do you say? What do you do?

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Well, if you're John and Marlena, you haul your hormones down to the car for a heapin' helpin o' monkey sex. And if you're John, you are so hot to trot, you give her a quick cop-a-feel butt slap on the way out the door.



Have a great weekend, kids. Peace out.

The Pocket Man

Billie and Phillip come back to Lauren's apartment to get Phillip's cell phone. They find it's locked again. Billie says, "Once' you've entered an apartment illegally, it doesn't much matter if you do it again." She picks the lock. Inside, Lauren watches the doorknob wiggle, runs and hides. Billie and Phillip come in. "Well, It's much easier the second time around," says Billie, "And it's a good thing that security system I invented turned out to be such a bust or she might have it installed in this apartment right now."

Phillip grabs his phone. Billie smells something, "It's perfume, and it ain't mine." Lauren paces.

Belle and Shawn are in the hallway outside the apartment. Belle says Phillip deserves to know Shawn flew there on the 4th and met with Lauren. Shawn wants to know Belle believes he had nothing to do with any of this.

Kayla takes the baby. Lexie tries to talk sense into her. Abe asks what about Steve. "It won't be a problem," says Kayla, "He let me keep a puppy I brought home once." Mrs. Meyer interrupts the conversation. Kayla assures them all Steve will be just fine with this, "He will want to give this cutie a home as much as I do."

Steve barges into the room and growls, "He will want to give which cutie a what?"

Bo and Hope come into the church out of the pouring rain. They bicker about getting wet. Hope tells Bo to open the box. Bo stands there. Hope yells, "Why aren't you moving?"

Shakespeare looks in on the scene and makes revisions to the Taming of the Shrew. He changes the main character's name to Hope.

Bo says, "I can't just open it. This is a holy tabernacle. Only a priest can open it."

Hope asks about the nun praying there, "What about her,"

Bo says, "No. She's a nun."

Hope says, "That's all right."

Sister Andre looks up.

The Guinness Book of World Records announced today that Salem has become the first town ever to have had every male citizen dress up as a nun.

Kayla stammers. She says she is glad Steve is there, "Take a look at this little bug." Steve takes a look and calls the exterminators. Kayla hems, haws and comes to the conclusion that they might want to take it in. The social worker asks if there is a problem.

Patch looks the kid over, "Problem? He's got all his fingers and toes, and eyes, right?"

Abe vouches for the Johnson's and takes the social worker outside to talk to her. Lexie follows. Abe makes a case for Steve and Kayla, "And I'm sure your screening procedures are by the book."

Lexie jumps in, "That's the way my husband runs his department, too, by the book. Unfortunately, the book is the Dummies Guide to Police Work."

Abe says, "And I'm sure that's the way Heidi Seyman does things, too."

Mrs. Myers gasps, "You know my supervisor!"

"Yes," says Abe, "Let's go give her a call." Abe and the social worker go off to make the call.

Lexie goes back in and cautions Steve and Kayla about what they are getting into, "This is the time to speak up if you want to back out."

Kayla is just bubbly. She bounces the kid and says, "You're going home with us!"

Steve's dark side emerges, "I think you just blindsided me."

"That's pretty easy to do from your left side," says Kayla.

Belle knows Shawn didn't encourage the phone calls Lauren made to Phillip. Shawn knows Philip doesn't trust him and he doesn't trust Phillip, either.

Phillip figures someone came in after they left and could still be there. They start the search, but a knock at the door immediately interrupts it. "What's that," asks Billie, "Girl Scout cookies?" Phillip opens the door and sees the kiddies standing there. He asks what they are doing there. They walk in and Shawn tells Phillip he met with Lauren there in Indianapolis.

Phillip seethes, "You SOB! Why didn't you tell me this?"

Bo insists they need a priest as Hope tries to approach Sister Mary Butt-uglya. Bo stops her and we go through more inane cutesy arguing as they go for the priest. Andre the nun follows.

Abe is on hold. Lexie comes up. Mrs. Myers is off checking other clients. They discuss Steve and Kayla taking the baby. Abe thinks Steve is reluctant. He thinks Steve isn't up to 2am feedings, especially since they plan on breast feeding. Heidi comes on the line. Abe requests a fast-track approval.

Steve and Kayla bicker over taking the baby. He thinks this will all be over when they do the background check on him anyway. He brings up Stephanie and driving her away. Kayla says that will work itself out. She admits there will be questions about Steve's past, but Abe is standing up for them. "Maybe he shouldn't be," says Steve.

Shawn says he knows he should have told Phillip. He tells them about Mimi, Bonnie and the whole deal. Lauren wanted to get to Phillip through Mimi, but Mimi wouldn't give her his phone number. So Lauren gave up on Mimi and turned to someone dumb enough to give her the number. Shawn says he gave her the number because he didn't think there was a baby. Phillip can't believe it. Suddenly, they hear something. Billie and Phillip rush into the back bedroom.

Kayla. Patch. Baby bickerin' blues. Nothing new. Kayla thinks the kid is totally cute and so little he would fit in your pocket. And thus, another idiotic DOOL name is born. "I guess that's better than Benjy part II," says Patch. Kayla says it's just for a couple days and then they can talk about their own adoption.

"This whole situation is out of control," says Patch, "You're out of control."

Apparently, Lauren got out the window. The apartment is on the 17th floor and, coincidentally, she passed Claire dangling from the flagpole on the way down. Billie calls detective Waite. Phillip goes to look for Lauren in the alley. Shawn says if he can't find her, Phillip will focus all his energy on Belle and Claire, "Why didn't I just believe her when she said she had his baby? Man, I just made this whole thing worse."

Bo and Hope come back into the church and find Sister Nunzilla's footprints on the floor. "Pretty big feet for a woman," says Bo.

"You mean for a rhinoceros," says Hope. She wonders if father Wallace came through. Or perhaps Sasquatch. Bo goes to find the nun and wants Hope to wait for the father. We have more stupid arguing about Hopes rain soaked shoes. Hope wonders if Andre followed them to Ireland. Bo tells her to stay there. He leaves. Hope strolls over to the tabernacle, which looks more like a Starbuck's espresso machine, and contemplates it. "So... only a man can be trusted to open a tabernacle, eh?"

Kayla knows this is happening too fast and Patch is overwhelmed, but, by God, she's going to press it anyway. She says Pocket needs them.

"What I need is a new name," says Pocket.

"He needs somebody, so why not us," pleads Kayla. Patch thinks he isn't qualified to handle the job. He doesn't know if he ever will be able to, or if he wants to be.

Phillip returns. No sign of Lauren. He badgers Shawn about his little holiday rendezvous with her, "I think you found a way to get back at me because you know I can take better care of Claire than you can."

Claire sits on the start-finish line of the Indianapolis Motor Speedway as the cars zoom by her at 225 mph, "Man, this is the best seat in the house!"

Bo returns as Andre sneaks around. Hope suggests they open the box. Bo says they can't tempt fate. Hope thinks nobody is safe until they find out what is in there, "We need to do it now while we still can. God knows who we are. He knows we mean no offense."

Bo agrees and sticks the key into the tabernacle.

Kayla backs off. She says she wasn't thinking about Steve. She picks up Pocket. I guess that makes her a pickpocket. Sorry. I know that was awful, but sometimes you just can't resist. She says she was thinking about where he might end up and what they could do for him. She agrees the priority is her, Steve and Stephanie getting their lives back.

"But you're already too far gone, aren't you, Sweetness?"

"Totally out of my mind," says Kayla, "From the second I saw him... I know it's my problem."

"Your problem is my problem," says Patch, "He's really cute. It's the daddy thing. I'm not saying I'll never do it, just not right now."

"You're looking in the rearview mirror at your mid-fifties," says Kayla, "Just when were you planning on doing it, then?" She starts to go tell Abe the deal is off.

Patch stops her, "Just hang on a minute." Several people in the audience grab their barf bags after that quick turnaround.

Belle says Phillip has no right to say that to Shawn. Shawn and Phillip go back to arguing. Belle tells Phillip he would be dead if Shawn weren't the Salem town idiot. She reminds him Shawn was one of the Four Mouseketeers who came to Iraq to save him.

"I wish he had saved my leg," says Phillip.

Belle also reminds him Shawn has never thrown it in Phillips face.

"That's only because I change faces so often," says Phillip. He rages, "You're no friend of mine. Maybe you never were." Shawn tells him to believe what he wants to believe. Phillip believes Shawn was in on it all along. Billie backs him off, "It's not doing any of us any good to stand around and rehash old wounds. We're not getting anywhere so snap out of it!"

Patch does a 180. He thinks one of the little pieces of the puzzle of his life just hooked up to a bigger piece. He remembers the day Stephanie was born. He feels it all over again. Mrs. Meyers comes back and says they have been approved. Kayla is soooo sad. She turns to Mrs. Meyers and says, "I'm sorry, but..."

Steve interrupts and says that's good news. He takes the Pocket Man while Kayla goes to sign the papers. Kayla is in shock. "Get out of here before I flip-flop on you," says Steve.

"You already did," says Kayla. She leaves to sign the papers. Patch bonds with Pocket, "I'm kinda flyin' blind if you know what I mean."

Pocket sucks his pacifier, "I could tell you were half blind just by looking at you."

Patch suggests, "Hey, let's go celebrate with wings and burgers. Oh, I forgot, you need teeth for that. What do you think of global warming? Hmmm... That's too heavy. How 'bout them Cubs? Are you a Cubs fan?"

Phillip wants a straight answer from Belle, "Did you know about this?"

"Of course not."

Phillip tells Shawn to take his apology and shove it. He goes to look for the baby. Belle chases him down and says they are still his friends. He rejects her. He's had all the help he needs from them. Phillip walks off.

Bo asks God's forgiveness for what he is about to do. "He forgives you," says Hope.

"How do you know," says Bo, "Do you have your own pipeline to Him?"

"We've done a lot of talking the last too years," says Hope.

God slaps his forehead, "Ugh! Don't remind me."

Bo tries the key in the lock and it doesn't work. A kid walks into the church and asks, "Would ya be the Brady's, then?"

"Yes," says Bo, "How did you know." The kid says the priest told him they were in there. So, how did the priest know? The kid says the priest will be in to see them in a few minutes. He will go tell the priest they are waiting. The kid leaves. Bo and Hope discover his backpack. Hope chases him but can't catch him. She comes back, and Bo finds a toy truck inside. Bo wonders why he had it in there. Three guesses, folks.

Patch sings to the Pocket Man.

"Don't give up your day job," says the Pocket Man.

"I don't have a job," says Patch.

Abe comes in. He says Kayla is finishing things up. "He's a cute kid," says Abe.

"Yeah, he looks like me," says Patch.

"I said cute," says Abe. Steve thanks Abe for helping them. Abe wonders if Steve is ready for this. He doesn't think Steve is ready for dirty diapers and 2AM feedings.

Kayla comes back and announces everything is ready to go. Abe welcomes them to parenthood. "Good thing it's only temporary," says Steve. Lexie takes out her cell phone to take a picture.

"Say cheese," says Abe.

Steve smiles big, "Change me."

Billie leaves. Belle says Phillip will calm down. Shawn thanks he won't. He thinks the friendship is over. Shawn says they have to pack and leave the mansion when they get back to Salem, "He'll kick us out, Claire or no Claire."

Claire stands in Victory Lane with the winner of the Indianapolis 500 and guzzles champagne like water, "I never get to get plastered like this when Mom and Dad are around."

Bo thinks the little truck is great. He tells Hope he never had a toy truck when he was a kid because pop didn't allow them. Suddenly, Bo hears something, "Hope, it's ticking!" FF.

Previews
========

Hope screams, "Bo! Bo!" Bo runs toward the door with the truck as Andre (probably) watches in the background.

Jeremy tells Max, "The trunks of designer knockoffs... That was just a cover for what I'm really doing. I've been smuggling women into the country from eastern Europe."

Nick sits in a booth at the pub. He puts his arm around a beaming Chelsea and tells China, "This is the girl I plan to spend the rest of my life with, and no money grubbing, opportunistic tramp from Vegas is gonna get in the way of that."

Baby Needs A New Pair Of Shoes

Belle shows Shawn a check. His eyeballs pop out as she explains, "It's for my first year's tuition. It was from the college fund they set up for me when I was a kid and they were really shocked. They thought they'd never have to spend it since I'm such a big fat airhead."

Shawn immediately jumps to her defense, "THAT'S NOT TRUE! You're not fat."

Shawn thinks she will be the hottest thing is scrubs. She asks if he is really OK with her becoming a nurse. Shawn has decided to be a big boy about it. He won't argue with John and Marlena about footing the bill, either, or that wardrobe Marlena bought Belle. Belle tells him she hasn't been completely honest. She tells him Phillip bought the wardrobe. Shawn's big boy days may be over.

Billie and Phillip snoop around an apartment, which a woman named Selena Doyle leases. Phillip knocks. Nothing. He knocks again. Noting. "Billie speculates, "Maybe she's shopping – you know, Baby needs a new pair of shoes." Billie breaks out her handy dandy lock-picking kit.

Kayla is at the hospital. She actually came to work for a change. She sees a baby and makes over it. The nurse on duty tells her it's an abandoned baby, with a note and everything, "Please take care of my baby."

EJ encourages Sami to come with him and stop fussing over the refrigeration truck. Sami wails and says she is scared. She just doesn't know what she would do without EJ. "Lean on me," he says. She leans. He leads. Lucas frosts.

Sami runs back to the truck. She screams. She knows Lucas is in there. She finds a brick on the street and starts pounding it on the lock, "Help me EJ! Help me get this open!"

Belle tells Shawn about the wardrobe. Shawn continues to be a big boy and says she doesn't have to give it back. Belle is a little surprised Shawn feels that way since the gift was so personal. "A thong is personal," says Shawn. He's thrilled the clothes made her happy. They argue over who asked who to get married first. He thinks Phillip was trying to make him look bad, though.

Billie and Phillip search the apartment. Billie sees things that were in the picture, so she thinks they are in the right place. Phillip thinks they are barking up the wrong tree, "If there was a baby here there would have to be something left behind. Blankets, diapers something left behind to prove..."

Billie holds up a little teddy toy, "Something like this?"

Phillip grabs it from her, "Dammit!"

Kayla lifts the baby. She tells the nurse to alert Abe and report it. She turns to the kid, "Hi there, mister! What is your name? We're gonna take very good care of you. You are a little bug aren't you? Just a little bug."

EJ tries to stop Sami as she goes nuts and pounds the lock with the brick. Sami screams and begs Lucas to say something if he is in there. Lucas reaches for the tape recorder and presses the button. The monotone voice drones, "Help me!" That sends Sami to a new level of freaking out, "I knew someone was in there! What are you doing, EJ? Help me!"

Shawn thinks Phillip reminded Belle she was with a guy who can't do as much for her as Phillip can. Belle thinks he's exaggerating. "Yeah," says Shawn, "When the Ferrari Spyder shows up in the drive, send it back."

"What if it's for you," asks Belle.

"To err is human, to forgive is divine," says Shawn.

They argue about Phillip's generosity. Belle finally decides, "I'll give the clothes back."

"What," asks Shawn, "And make me look like an idiot?"

"OK," says Belle, "I'll keep the clothes, but you'll still look like an idiot."

"You know he made a play to get you back," says Shawn, "Phillip has the same agenda he's always had – to get his life back with you and Claire."

"Phillip doesn’t stand a chance," says Belle.

Shawn says he can't offer her the same life Phillip can. Belle says, "I'm not after money. Just the things it buys."

Phillip wonders why the mystery woman bolted. "Probably because you told her you were bringing a detective," says Billie. She finds a gym ID with a picture. Phillip recognizes Lauren. He tells Billie about the embryo switcheroo. Phillip starts to call the cops. Billie stops him.

Dr. Davidoff checks out the baby and declares him to be in good condition. Abe and Lexie walk in and Kayla makes all the intros. Dr. Davidoff leaves and Abe takes a look at the note, "He writes pretty well for an infant." Abe says he will check the surveillance videos and call CPS. Kayla says she really hates for a tiny baby to go into that system. Abe leaves. Kayla and Lexie make over the baby.

Kayla can't imagine someone walking away from him. She reminisces about her own baby – the grown woman who now hates her parents. Kayla tells Lexie she and Steve have been talking about adopting. She says Steve isn't so enthusiastic about it, but she knows the second she lays a baby in his arms he will melt.

"Why would you want to melt a baby," asks Lexie.

Billie insists Phillip can't call the cops. It seems what they have done might be construed as Breaking & Entering by those pesky boys. "Besides," says Billie, "What if your kid really is out there?"

Phillip's head spins, "Talk about déjà vu. This time I want to go through the proper channels. Come on, we can tell the cops the door was open. I'll explain it all." Billie OK's it but she doesn't want Phillip to get hurt. Phillip dials.

Belle says, "You are #1 with me."

"What a coincidence," says Shawn, "That's my IQ, too."

They go through more endless arguing without saying a single new thing. It finally wears Belle down, "I have been totally blind."

EJ finally gets with the program. He goes at the lock with the brick. It doesn't work. He goes for the tire iron in Lucas' car and breaks the lock. He struggles with the door, opens it and Sami rushes in. She finds Lucas and falls apart, "OMG, EJ, he is so cold." Rather than drag him out into the warm air, she slobbers over him in the truck.

Finally EJ picks him up and drags Lucas out as Sami bawls. Outside, Sami begs him to wake up as EJ goes to call 911. Lucas looks up at Sami and says, "I love you."

Belle says Phillip has provided and she convinced herself he was trying to make up for the craziness surrounding the mix-up with Claire. Shawn thinks if Phillip wants a family he should stop obsessing over Belle and maybe he will meet a girl of his own. Belle insists he wants someone to love who will love him back. Shawn says, "Tell that to Phillip."

Belle says she will. She decides to give the clothes back or, if Phillip won't take them, to a church, "Phillip has to realize you belongs with me."

The cops have arrived at the apartment. One of them questions Billie and Phillip about the baby. He says the woman in question isn't a fugitive or a missing person. Billie suggests he put out an APB. He isn't sure he should do it, "What're you a cop or something?"

"In a former life," says Billie. Well, that makes things just cozy, so the cop says he will see what he can do. He gets called out and Billie shows Phillip a bib.

"So what does that prove," asks Phillip, "That the kid had peas for dinner?"

"No," says Billie, "This will have DNA on it. We can use it to find out if you are the father."

The cop comes back in, "The lady next door says the woman here had a baby. He was a real cutie."

Billie sighs, "I guess he can't be Phillip's then."

As Billie, Phillip and the cop talk things over, Lauren comes back, sees them and beats a hasty retreat.

Abe brings Mrs. Myers form CPS into the room. He has a list of babies born there in the last couple months – Over 100. Mrs. Myers says the kid will be placed in foster care. She tells Kayla not to fret, "He'll have a warm bed."

"But what about love," asks Kayla. Mrs. Myers starts to leave but Kayla stops her. Mrs. Myers reminds Kayla about some of the little inconveniences of having a baby, like the 2AM feeding. Kayla remembers the 2AM feeding and says she always thought it was a time of peace and quiet. Mrs. Myers says it's not like that for everyone. She says she will find the child a good home. Kayla says the kid is at an age when he should be bonding with his mother.

Mrs. Myers looks down at the baby and says, "Well, you're stuck with me now, huh?"

Kayla gasps, "Don't go! I'll take care of him."

The cop says he will check the local hospitals to see if he can find out where the baby was born. He gives them his card and leaves. Billie wonders why Phillip isn't a little more enthusiastic, "You may have just found out you have a kid. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd say that's an OMG." Phillip tells her the surrogate was supposed to terminate the pregnancy. He doesn't know why she wouldn't, "Unless someone talked her into having it – Shawn Brady."

Shawn says Belle doesn't have to give the clothes back. He wants this to end, all of it. He says there is more. He wasn't telling her the truth about the 4th, "I wasn't in Cleveland."

Belle asks, "Where were you."

Shawn says, "Indianapolis with Mimi. She's the best liar Salem ever saw and she's helping me with the bull I'm dumping on you. He says the weird phone calls started there. He got a call from Mimi. Bonnie is doing time outside Indianapolis. Bonnie told Mimi she got phone calls about a baby and Bonnie owing money. Mimi asked Shawn to step in.

Belle thinks Mimi should have stepped in herself, but Shawn says she couldn't leave Tucson because of her brother. He says Lauren never terminated the pregnancy. Bonnie paid her, figuring she would put the squeeze on Phillip later.

Shawn says he went to see Lauren, but didn't see a baby. He told Lauren this was all her problem and gave her Phillip's phone number. Belle wonders why Shawn didn't tell her all this before. "That would have made too much sense," says Shawn, "Besides, Phillip would try to convince you I was in on it."

"Why," asks Belle.

"Because we are in the love with the same woman."

Phillip tells Belle he thinks Shawn is involved in this. He thinks Shawn is jealous and is trying to distract him. Billie is skeptical. She wonders if the baby involved might not even be Phillip's. Phillip is sure the baby is his.

Sami holds Lucas, "Popsicle man, next time you are overheated, find an air conditioner." The medics say he will be OK. Sami will go with him to the hospital. After they wheel Lucas off, Sami thanks EJ for saving Lucas life.

"Let's just hope we don't have to make it a third time," he says. He stops himself, "Oh, I'm so sorry. That was inappropriate. Believe me, I am a different man. You have nothing to fear from me."

"I wish I could believe that," says Sami, "I am afraid of you and I think I always will be."

EJ insists she can trust him right now. What he did to her was vile and inhuman. "But you are a different person, right," asks Sami.

EJ flashes back to setting up the refrigeration truck, placing the dummy and the tape recorder. "I love you," he says, "I truly love you, and that has changed me."

"Don't talk to me like that," says Sami.

EJ thinks this has Andre's fingerprints all over it. Sami's says to tell Stefano the next time she shows up with a gun she will finish the job.

Shawn swears he didn't know what Lauren would do. He tells Belle he spoke to her today at the beach. She asked for his help with Phillip. Belle says they have to find Phillip and tell him.

Phillip thanks Billie for going the extra mile on his behalf. Lauren listens as Billie says, "You wanted a son, now you may have one."

"Wherever he is," says Phillip.

Billie promises, "We'll find him." They leave. Lauren rushes into her apartment. She rummages through her desk, "Dammit! Where did I leave it?" Phillip and Billie return. Phillip left his cell phone. Lauren watches as the knob wiggles.

Kayla tells Mrs. Meyer she wants to take the baby home. FF Kayla.


Previews
========

Shawn asks, "Why didn't I just believe her when she said she had his baby?" Belle asks, "What?" Shawn says, "Man, I just made this whole thing worse."

Patch looks at the baby and says, "I'm kinda flyin' blind if you know what I mean." The baby sucks his pacifier.

Bo and Hope walk into a church and see a nun praying. Hope says, "What about her," Bo says, "No. She's a nun." Hope says, "That's all right." Sister Andre looks up.

Shawn and Belle look on as Billie yells as Phillip, "It's not doing any of us any good to stand around and rehash old wounds. We're not getting anywhere so snap out of it!"

Colleen says, "Oh, Mr. DiMeeeeera! I'm not in the habit of doing this!" Santo leers, "If you weel a-notice, you're not-a in your habit at all-a at the moment-a."

Iceman

Shawn sits on a rock and thinks. Let's rephrase that. Shawn sits on a rock. If anyone in this scene has a high enough IQ to think, it's the rock. Belle comes up behind him, "I thought I'd find you here."

Shawn apologizes for taking off. He wasn't angry or upset, but asks why Belle wanted to know if he was in Indianapolis. He swears he had nothing to do with Phillip getting the phone calls.

John and Marlena sit at a booth in the pub. Bo joins them. His arm is in a sling, instead of his butt for a change. It seems Bo pulled a Shawn and tried to drive his motorcycle through something solid. Bo and the motorcycle lost. Anyway, Bo introduces Jim, who is already sitting in the booth. Jim has been sitting in the booth with John and Marlena for some time now, and they wondered who he was.. Bo tells them Jim is a lock expert. Jim analyzes the key, "It's from the Vatican." Bells go off in the background.

Roman is ready to leave the hospital. Sami tells him she bets he's having a great time there with all the nurses hovering around him. "My nurse's name is Rob," snorts Roman, "And right now I really need something smothered in chili."

Back at the pub, Anna orders chili."

Roman and Sami talk about the key. Sami wishes Stefano had swallowed it and choked on it. Roman tells her to stay out of it. It isn't worth it if she goes after Stefano and hurts the twins.

EJ says, "Sorry Lucas old chap, you're about to have an unfortunate accident." He sends a text message, "There! That should do nicely."

Belle says Shawn can't pull the "if you don't trust me its' over routine." Only Princess Belle is allowed to pull stuff like that. She lectures.

Shawn says, "I thought you wanted to be a nurse, not a cop." Belle just wants to know what's going on. She insists she understands. "I'm not so sure you will this time," says Shawn.

"The Vatican," says Bo, "That's big time." Give a gold star to Bo. Jim thinks the key opens a tabernacle. "Oh," says Bo, "The sacred vessel that holds the communion wafers. That would be sacrilegious, but I guess you'd expect that from the DiMeras. Now, of all the tabernacles in the world, we have to find the one this key opens."

Sami doesn't want the DiMeras ganging up on them. "You're not a one woman army," says Roman, "More like a one woman psych ward."

Lucas gets what he thinks is a text from his mom. She asks to meet him at restaurant row. Sami is sure some bartender just mixed her martini wrong. She wants to go with him, but Lucas says he can only handle Kate and her one at a time. He leaves.

Roman asks if Sami is OK. "Yeah," she huffs. She says she's a little nervous when someone she loves is out of her sight. He says Lucas can take care of himself. Sami says she thought Roman could too, but she was wrong.

Shawn says he was planning on going to Cleveland, but Mimi called. Meanwhile, Lauren stalks. Shawn says Mimi just wanted to tell him the divorce is final. He started thinking about all the strings attached to the job in Cleveland and it all seemed wrong, "I just needed to stop and take a breath. To think. Well, to take a breath anyway." He swears he didn't go to Indianapolis. Belle says she believes him. Hugs. As they hug, Shawn sees Lauren cowering in the bushes. He suggests going to the pub. She thinks he might want a Brady burger, "You need some red meat to build your strength for later." He asks her to go ahead and order for him.

After Belle leaves, Lauren walks up to him, "I need help."

Jim analyzes the key, "The head is the shape of a shamrock, so the church is in Ireland." Jim leaves. John asks, "Any guess where our mystery church is?"

Roman sits in bed with his tray of mystery food in front of him. He tells Sami he's on a hunger strike until she promises to stop messing with the DiMeras. Sami reminds him he could have died. "Nobody flies solo," says Roman.

Sami says she made a vow to end the vendetta, "We have to hit them."

"The moment you're willing to kill someone," says Roman, "is the moment you become one of them."

Lucas drives up and gets out of his car. He leaves the door open and walks down the street. He hears muffled cries, "Help! Somebody help me!"

Lucas calls out, "Mom?" More screams for help. "Mom, where are you?" EJ peers over a wall like Kilroy.

"The tabernacle must be in St. Malachy's," says Hope. John wants to head over in his private jet. Marlena worries. She just got him back and doesn't want to lose him again. Bo says he has frequent flyer miles he needs to burn, so he volunteers to go. John doesn't think he's up to it, what with his bum shoulder and all. Hope, however, thinks it's one way to keep him off the street, and out of her hair. They all agree. Bo will be the one to go.

"While I'm gone," says Bo, "Take care of Roman."

"I won't even let him get on a motorcycle," says John. John gets fifteen yards for unsportsmanlike conduct.

Roman once again tells Sami to leave the DiMeras alone. Sami doesn't understand why this is his fight. "I'm not pregnant," says Roman, "Why don't you just knit booties like every other expectant mother?"

"Yeah," says Sami, "Knitting needles – they would make a great weapon." Sami says she wants Roman around to tell exaggerated cop stories to his grandkids. She says she will cool it for a while, but he can't expect her to sit around forever.

Lucas snoops around. He thinks the cries for help might be coming from a refrigeration truck parked there. He goes inside and investigates, "MOM?" Lucas sneaks to the front of the truck and finds a tackily dressed dummy with several necklaces, "Yep, that's Mom all right," he says, "A tastelessly dressed dummy." He also sees a tape recorder sitting beside the dummy playing the cries for help.

SLAM! Lock.

EJ finishes locking the truck. Lucas screams for help as EJ walks away.

Marlena says she knows it's tough for John to sit this one out. He says if she needs him here, here is where he will stay. He kisses her. Belle walks up as they go at each other, "Get a room, you two." She sits down and shows them the Salem U catalog and announces she has applied. They are sooooooo thrilled. John offers to pick up the tuition tab. Belle is grateful, but says she will pay him back. John says they will work something out. Marlena asks if Shawn is OK with this. Belle tells them Shawn agreed to support her, after acting like a typical possessive Neanderthal.

"Good marriages aren't born," says Marlena.

"They are created," says John, "And your mom has had a lot of practice creating them, that's for sure." He suggests there is married housing on campus. Belle thinks a dorm isn't the answer.

"And living with Phillip is," asks John. John is in a hole now. Fifteen more yards. "If it doesn't work for both you and Shawn, it doesn't work for either."

"Except if it works for me," says Belle, "It works for both of us."

Lauren wants payback. She's worried that Phillip has her phone number and probably her address. She decides it would be best if Shawn just take the baby to Phillip. "You're ditching your own baby," asks Shawn, "What kind of person are you?"

Sami comes out of Roman's room and meets Bo in the hallway. He asks her to sit down. Concerned EJ stands in the background. Bo is distraught, "It's Lucas... I'm sorry, Sami, the bad news is we found him too late. He got stuck in a refrigerated truck. The good news is he won first place in the Salem ice-sculpture contest."

Sami screams, "That's not possible!" EJ hugs her and consoles her.

Back to reality. They wheel Roman out of his room and he sees EJ, "What the hell are you doing here." EJ is still in dreamland. "I asked you a question," booms Roman.

Sami shoves Roman's wheelchair forward, "Want me to run him over, Dad?"

EJ says he just came to see how Roman is doing. He says he doesn't know where Andre is, but is sure he isn't too far away. They wheel Roman to radiology.

EJ tells Sami she looks tired. "Thanks," says Sami, "That's code for 'you look like hell.'"

"No," says EJ, "You look beautiful. Tired, but beautiful. Kate walks up. She says she brought Roman some reading material – books about cops, "He has to learn what a cop is supposed to do somehow." Sami asks where Lucas is. "How the hell should I know," asks Kate. Sami reminds her she sent Lucas a text message asking to meet him. Kate has no idea what Sami is talking about.

That does it. Sami digs deep inside and one of her multiple personalities emerges. It's the one that is a blithering out of control basket case. "This could be another trap," she wails.

Lucas pounds, screams and shivers. The dummy is pretty calm, though. He sees the fan blowing cold air. He takes out his handy-dandy Boy Scout knife and tires to disable it.
ZAP! Lucas sizzles and drops. Well, at least that warmed him up.

Meanwhile, back at the hospital, EJ tells Sami there is no reason for concern. "Are you kidding me," bawls Sami, "My family has been picked off like carnival ducks. Of course there is reason to worry!" She runs around the hospital corridors like a crazed pinball.

EJ turns to Kate, "What have you done?"

"I didn't do anything," says Kate.

"The text message came from your phone," says EJ.

"That doesn't mean it came from me," says Kate, "If you've hurt my son..."

EJ denies, "What, do you think, after I got drunk and threatened him I was stupid enough to go out and do something?"

"Well," says Kate, "Making men stupid is Sami's specialty."

Sami completes her out of control tour of the hospital. She runs up and says she thinks they should call the cops. They argue about who did what. They decide to split up and look for Lucas. Kate goes one way while EJ and Sami go another. Meanwhile, Lucas goes numb. The Ice Man Numbeth.

Lucas wakes up on a nice, warm beach. Sami comes up and he asks where she has been. They have missed each other. Kiss. Lucas backs off. "Where are you going," asks Sami. Lucas says he has to go, but wants her to go with him. Sami can't.

"But it's so peaceful and calm over there," says Lucas.

Sami begs, "Please don't leave me." Lucas backs off as Sami begs again. "This isn't your time," she bawls, "Hold on, Lucas, just a little while longer!"

Lucas wakes up, grimaces and falls unconscious again.

Belle says lying has become second nature for her and Shawn. She says she isn't keeping anything important from him though. Marlena asks, "You told him that you got that fabulous wardrobe from Phillip. You did tell him, didn't you, sweetie?" Sweetie gives a blank stare.

Shawn says he doesn't even know if the baby is real. He didn't see one in Indianapolis. Lauren insists it is real. Shawn says, "It's pretty obvious to me that you're scamming Phillip. I don't want any part of it. You're on your own."

Belle says she wanted to tell Shawn about Phillip giving her the wardrobe, but doesn't want any more fights. Marlena wonders how Belle would like it if Shawn were taking presents from women. For one of the few times in her life, Belle gets it.

Lauren has handed Shawn a birth certificate to prove the kid is real. Shawn looks it over but says this is her problem. He doesn't want Belle thinking he has anything to do with it, "This is all the help you're getting from me."

Sami finds Lucas' car and screams for him. EJ tries to calm her down, "There are no signs of a struggle." He suggests talking to the merchants in the area to see if they have seen him. Sami feels Lucas is close. She wonders what the truck is doing there. She wants to check it out. She screams and pounds. EJ tries to back her off, but Sami says she isn't going anywhere until she finds out what is inside.

Sami screams. Lucas zones.

Lauren cries. Shawn tells her that won't help. Lauren thinks she should get something out of the deal. Shawn says it's a baby not a deal. If she tells Phillip he might surprise her and she won't go to jail. He says he wants out of it and walks away as she yells for him.

"Why is life so complicated," asks Belle.

"That keeps it interesting," says John, "unlike DOOL."

Belle agrees to tell Shawn about the clothes. But she still wants to be a nurse. Belle remembers quiet time she and Marlena used to share. Marlena would come home with her casework and Belle would sit beside her with her crayons. Marlena remembers it well, "That was a great afternoon we spent together yesterday, wasn't it? " Belle was the most important thing in the world to Marlena. Belle feels that way about Claire.

Still unsupervised, Claire crawls along the ledge of the fifty-seventh story of the Salem Towers trying to catch the cute little birdies.

Poor Belle feels sorry for herself, though. She doesn't get to do what people her age do, "I – wah – don't – wah – get – wah – to – wah – any – wah – parties – wahwahwah." John and Marlena offer to help so poor little Belle can do the things she wants to do and have her own quiet time with Claire, who at the moment is teetering from the microwave antenna atop the Salem Towers as lightning flashes around her.

John and Marlena tell Belle they may have found the key to the feud. John thinks maybe things are falling in their favor. Speaking of falling, Claire...

Bo and Hope are in Roman's room. Roman is peeved Bo gets to go to Ireland alone. He tells Bo be careful. He will keep an eye on Sami. Bo says, "Man, she's talking like a one woman wrecking crew."

Roman says, "Let's put and end to this thing."

"Amen brother," says Bo.

Sami wrestles with the lock on the truck as EJ tells her to stop wasting her time. Sami objects. Lucas frosts. Sami struggles with EJ, "I'm gonna stay here and find my husband! Lucas! Lucas!"

EJ tries to drag her off. Sami don' wanna. She says she is scared. EJ understands. He finally gets her to walk off crying. Lucas tires to move. He drops his arm and goes unconscious. FF Frosty.

Previews
========

Phillip says, "If there was a baby here there would have to be something left behind. Blankets, diapers something left behind to prove..." Billie holds up a little teddy toy, "Something like this?" Phillip grabs it from her, "Dammit!"

A social worker holds a baby and says, "You're stuck with me now, huh?" Kayla gasps, "Don't go! I'll take care of him." Lexie looks on.

Shawn says, "I wasn't in Cleveland." Belle asks, "Where were you." Shawn says, "Indianapolis. Trying to help Mimi."

A Dancing Chicken Farmer

Billie looks at a manila envelope as Phillip hounds her. "Take it easy, turbo," says Billie, "God is in the details... or, in this case, the postmark – Indianapolis." Phillip says that doesn't put them any closer to solving this thing. Billie opens the envelope and finds a picture and a note. She reads, "Say hello to your baby boy. Maybe it's time you help with his upkeep."

"She's not getting a dime," snorts Phillip.

Shawn sees Belle come through the door, jumps over to her and grabs her from behind. Belle is giddy (so far, this is one of the manic days in her bipolar life ). She whirls around and they express their undying love for each other. Shawn tells her he is grateful, because he could be working for Phillip and earning some big bucks instead of being a grease monkey in a dead end job. But Belle didn't insist he do that. She starts to tell him what she wants to do but Shawn interrupts and tells her about Roman. Belle thinks it's amazing what doctors and nurses can do. She was thinking maybe that's what she should do – Get a nursing degree.

At the beach. Chelsea can't believe Kate gave her $50k. Nick offers to help her slop on the sunscreen, "I'll do your back."

He works her over while Chelsea rambles. She thinks she's been a bitch lately and doesn't think she deserved the money. Nick says he knows the money was a gift and the person who gave it shouldn't expect payback. Chelsea says Kate is paying for her tuition even though she did horrible things, "Family sticks together and forgives. So that is what I have to do." They decide they are both happy. Nick wonders if her forgiveness includes him.

She turns and smiles, "What do you think?" That's enough of a signal for Nick, who dives in for a kiss. She pushes him away, "Stop, Nick. We're not making that mistake again."

Lexie hoods up. Abe says it's good to see her. Lexie stares. Abe stares back, "Lexie?"

Phillip insists there is no way he is the father. "I haven't had any relationships since I was married to Belle." Billie wonders if he just doesn't remember. Phillip rolls his eyes. He wonders, if he is the father, why this mystery woman would try to extort him long distance instead of just knocking on his door.

"It's just possible... There might be more than one person involved," says Billie.

Shawn wonders why Belle wants a nursing degree, "You can't just disappear on Claire."

Belle insists she will not "just disappear." Shawn wonders what will happen when he is stuck at the garage and she is cramming for finals. He thinks she should wait until things are stable. That's why Belle wants to do this – to get things stable, "Our daughter needs a home and I'm going to provide it." Shawn checks his jeans and finds a couple things missing.

Chelsea wants to kiss Nick, but not just now. "Between the sunblock and the bikini, I'm losing my mind," says Nick.

"The sunblock and bikini had nothing to do with that," she says. Chelsea explains the rules. "There is only one rule, actually. It's about honesty. We have a history of lying to each other. Now that we have a second chance we have to start out by being honest."

"Sign me up," says Nick.

She blocks him from kissing her until they talk about their lives for the last two weeks, "I'll go first, starting with Jett."

Lexie tells Abe to stay back. He says he just wants to talk. He asks her to take off the hood. No dice. She says he knows her for who she is and pretended to be, "Dr. Lexie Carver – a tramp!"

"Where would you get that idea," asks the clueless Abe.

"Maybe from the thousand times you called me a tramp," says Lexie.

Shawn insists they can't both work. If Belle wants a house he'll get her one with a drive-thru living room. Belle brings up the interview he blew off. He could at least have given it a chance. He says nothing would be worth being away from her and Claire, "At the moment, however, maybe being away from you wouldn't be such a bad thing."

Nick asks if Chelsea slept with Jett. "No," says the brat.

"Not even a little bit," asks Nick.

"You can't sleep with someone a little bit," she says, "But if you could, I would have... and since we're being honest, maybe more than a little bit."

That does it for Nick, "Bye."

Chelsea stops him, "Nick, I don't want to sleep with him. I was a way for him to get to Stephanie." She says first Nick lied to her and then Jett lied to her. She feels like she can't trust anybody. But she decides Nick's lie was selfless. He did it to protect her. He goes for a kiss but she stops him again. She wants the truth from him. She wants to know about his lying to Stephanie.

Lexie says Abe made her feel like a tramp because he was trying to protect her, "What's bred in the bone will out in the flesh." She is a DiMera and doesn't want him to ever forget. He wants to know why he can't touch her or see her face.

"Because now it's my turn to protect you."

Phillip thinks he doesn't deserve this. Billie says that's because he is thinking rationally and the woman extorting him isn't. Phillip is discouraged. He thinks they'll never find out who she is. Billie takes a close look at the picture, "Want to bet?"

Belle doesn't want Shawn to be away either, so that's why she has to go to nursing school. They argue about who should provide for and protect Claire.

Meanwhile, little Claire is happy as a clam, "With those two bozos gone I'm free to sit here in the middle of Salem's main intersection and play in traffic all day."

"Why won't you let me do this," asks Belle, "This is about Phillip, Isn't it? You want to show him you can take care of your family without help. You need to forget him and start thinking about our daughter." Shawn decides Belle is right. They need a permanent place for Claire. He'll get a second job. "You're not doing that," says Belle.

Nick says he lied to Stephanie in order to help Chelsea. She says it's not him she doesn't trust – it's herself. She feels like he's changed but doesn't know for sure. He thinks he hasn't given her enough reason to believe him, but he will. He says he hated lying to Stephanie. Chelsea is just thrilled he told her the truth. She asks if there are any more secrets. Nick says no. He's being totally honest. Kiss.

Abe wants to know what Lexie is protecting him from. "Me," she says, "The DiMeras hurt the ones they love." Abe says he wants her. She insists he doesn't. She says he needs to find someone as good as he is, "I'm a DiMera."

"You're not a DiMera, dammit," growls Abe, "You're a Carver."

Billie says if she is right about her hunch, they will be able to ID the person. She sees a prescription bottle in the picture with a name on the label, "I'm going up to the lab to blow it up."

"While you're up there, blow up the picture, too," says Phillip. He wonders what happens next if she makes the identification.

"If I can do that, I'll start calling in favors."

"Then I find out who is doing this," says Phillip.

Argue, argue, argue. She Shawn and Belle argue. Strother Martin steps between them and tells them to knock it off, "WHAT WE HAVE HERE... IS A FAILURE... TO COMMUNICATE."

Nick says he's going to have to start checking out the want ads. Chelsea says there aren't too many genetic research jobs available. "It might be a good thing," says Nick, "I'm tired of looking down a microscope, anyway." He stares at her bikini top, "Although, I wish I had one right now." She says he had an amazing career going and she blew it for him. He wants some credit for blowing it too. He wonders if she has job suggestions, "Maybe I could be a chicken farmer... or a male dancer... or a dancing chicken farmer. There aren't too many of those around."

"And you'd have plenty of time to scope out the competition," says Chelsea.

"Tell that to the bill collectors," says Nick.

"Why don't you just give them the money you won in Vegas," she asks, "You do still have it don't you?"

Shawn. Belle. Tedium. Idiocy. Shawn says it feels like he has to prove himself to people. Belle says he doesn't have to do that, but that's the kind of guy he is, "You're the kind of guy who would rush into a burning building instead of away from it."

"Well," sighs Shawn, "Nobody said I was smart."

"You're right," says Belle, "No one has ever said that for sure, but you don't have to take care of everything."

"Why not," asks Shawn, "Phillip can."

Chelsea lectures Nick for giving away his winnings. He says he didn't need the money. She asks what he did with it, "You think I'm crazy huh," he asks.

"Yes," she says, "But that's why I love you. Thank you for telling me the truth." More kissing.

Abe repeats – Lexie is a Carver, not a DiMera, "Your damn fool husband threw you out and didn't protect you." He asks her forgiveness. He knows she tried to tell him the truth about the night John was shot, but he didn't give her a chance. He has been thinking about what kind of husband he was and it was painful for him.

"Not as painful as it was for your wife," says Lexie.

He says, "A good husband gives his love, but I loaned mine."

"I am a DiMera," says Lexie, "All twisted up inside. You can't fix me. That's the problem."

"No," says Abe, "The problem is me."

"No," says Lexie, "The problem is the dialogue. You can't buy stuff this bad at a cut-rate flea market."

Belle thinks if Shawn stops competing with Phillip, Phillip will stop competing with Shawn, "My sock puppets don't do anything for Claire anymore. And if I have to read 'Goodnight Moon' one more time I'll scream."

"Try reading it to Claire," says Shawn, "Maybe she would like it."

Belle begs, "Let me go back to school and we'll build our future together." Stars and Stripes Forever plays in the background.

Shawn caves in, "OK! Go back to school!"

Belle squeals, "Maybe I'll try out for the Salem U cheerleading squad!"

"I may like this whole higher education thing," says Shawn.

Phillip gets off the phone with Victor. Shawn and Belle bump into him. He tells them about the photo of the kid, the note wanting money and the prescription bottle. Billie comes back, "I got it. The prescription is for a baby. Tyler Kiriakis." Phillip lets out a sigh.

Abe doesn't know how Lexie put up with him. Every day she had to prove her worthiness of being his wife. He had no right to sit in judgment. She starts to go. He asks her to stay, "You never felt loved, just almost loved. There was always one more test you had to pass. I'm sorry. I understand if you never want to see me again. If you change your mind, come my way". He turns to leave.

Lexie gasps, "Oh, Abe!"

Nick and Chelsea maul each other on the beach. Chelsea brings things to a halt, "I feel like someone is watching."

China walks up, "Someone is. Girl, you could use China's six-week boot camp of loooovee." She turns to Nick and wags her finger, "And you... tsk... tsk... tsk... Not even married a month, and you're cheating on me."

Chelsea gives Nick a funny look, "You're married to her?"

"I have never seen this woman before," says Nick.

China says, "Honey you have seen every gorgeous inch of this woman. I married your fine behind and I have the paper to prove it." She whips out the marriage license and shows it to them.

Nick says, "This is a fake. I'm going to see my uncle Mickey, so instead of getting an annulment, you can take me for everything I've got."

"Hurry back," says China, "I've been missing my man."

"I swear, I'm not hiding anything," says Nick. He runs off to find Mickey. Good luck, Maggie has been searching for him for months.

Chelsea insists, "You're not married to him any more than I am." China says Chelsea needs some instruction. She hands her a special instructional DVD entitled, "Our Wedding."

Phillip insists he can't be the father. Billie says she got the kid's SSN, which enabled her to get an address and phone number. She hands Phillip her phone and says, "Just hit send and say hello."

Phillip makes the call, "This is Phillip Kiriakis. I know where you live and I'm..." bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. He turns to Billie, "She hung up." Billie and Phillip head for Indy.

Belle asks if Shawn is OK, "When Billie said she knew the address you looked like you were going to pass out. Where were you on the 4th? I want the truth! Did you go to Indianapolis that day?"

Lexie stammers. Abe says he loves her. He pours his heart out, "You don't have to hide anymore." He removes the hood, "I can see you now. I'm no longer blind." She falls crying into his arms.

Previews
========

John, Marlena and Belle sit at a booth in the pub. Marlena says, "You told him that you got that fabulous wardrobe from Phillip. You did tell him, didn't you, sweetie?" Sweetie gives a blank stare.

Shawn says, "It's pretty obvious to me that you're scamming Phillip. I don't want any part of it. You're on your own."

Bo and Hope are in Roman's hospital room. Bo says, "Man, she's talking like a one woman wrecking crew." Roman says, "Let's put and end to this thing."

Sami screams, "I'm gonna stay here and find my husband! Lucas! Lucas!" EJ holds her back. Lucas is on ice - literally.

Katie, Katie, Katie

Nick strolls aimlessly at the pier. Stephanie comes down the steps, "Hey, I got your message. Why did you want to meet here?"

Nick looks around at the dingy scene, "This set cost a lot of money to build and they are going to continue to tape scenes here even though it's a ridiculous place for us to meet." He wants to talk about Jeremy.

Abe tells Roman to hang in there. Roman hangs. Jett comes in and asks about Roman. Abe says he hasn't woke up yet, but he's keeping him company until he does, "Roman is better company when he is unconscious." They go outside to talk. Jett tells Abe he has blown his cover. Abe wonders how that could happen. He wonders what unbelievable set of circumstances let to this incredible slip up.

"Chelsea knows, because I told her," says the crack ISA agent.

Chelsea meets Granny at the pub. She can't believe Kate tried to blackmail Nick. Kate says she regrets it and wants to apologize. She asks what's going on with Chelsea. "Sameo sameo," says the brat, "In a couple weeks I go back to school full time. I wish it weren't so expensive. With what I earned with Touch The Sky, I have enough for two semesters of skipping classes."

Kate hands her an envelope, "Maybe this will help."

Chelsea drops her jaw, "Fifty thousand dollars. OMG!"

A couple walks out of the pub and stares at the evil hooded figure. Celeste meets Lexie. Lexie tries to leave, "You must let me go."

"You can't keep hiding forever," says Celeste. As the thermometer pushes 100°, Lexie pulls her hooded cloak around her a little tighter, blows in her cupped hands to warm them and asks if they can move out of the shade., "I'm not hiding. I'm just acting like an idiot. I was locked away for so long." Celeste asks if she is still going to therapy. Lexie says she is, but she knows after setting the trap for Andre, he's still out there, "Even though I hear he's feeling a little flat lately."

Celeste suggests going to Abe. Lexie is afraid of him most of all. She can't face him yet. "Then why don't you go back to your tunnel," snorts Celeste.

Jett runs through the Touch The Sky caper with Abe. He couldn't keep lying to Chelsea. She was on to him. She was suspicious and hurt. He says they aren't involved, but got kind of close while they were working together. He says Chelsea kept digging until she found out about Danielle. He's sure Jeremy is dirty, though. He says his superiors have set up an inquisition, "I think they are going to flatten me."

"Does Andre work for the ISA, too," asks Abe.

Stephanie asks if this is any way to treat a friend. Nick says he isn't Stephanie's friend so he is the one person she should listen to.

Chelsea says she can't accept the money. She thinks Kate is trying to buy her forgiveness. Kate doesn't want Chelsea to end up like her. Chelsea wonders what she means by that. Kate is one of the most successful women in Salem. She has successfully flushed more companies down the toilet than the Enron boys. Kate says she has had to do a lot she wasn't proud of to get where she is. Chelsea doesn't know when she can pay her back if she takes the money. Kate says Chelsea getting her degree and becoming successful will be payback enough.

"Why do I need a degree if I have fifty thousand dollars," asks Chelsea.

Kate tells her, "You are a Brady and a Roberts, and that is one hell of a combination. And I know you can succeed in spite of it."

The brat says Kate doesn't realize how much this means to her. It shows Kate actually cares. It shows you can buy love. She didn't even know she was adopted when she was with the Bensons, and she made Bo and Billie regret they found her. Kate insists they didn't regret it. Chelsea knows they love her, but it still feels like she doesn't belong, "But this I will never forget." She goes over to the other side of the booth and hugs Kate.

Nick says he has nothing against Jeremy, but something weird happened in Vegas. He says he was sitting at a bar and a couple of guys asked questions. They turned out to be cops, "They implied Jeremy is involved in something illegal."

Abe wonders how Jett can be surprised the top brass is irritated with him. Jett says Abe is the reason he became a police officer, "I didn't have superheroes when I was growing up. I had you. He talks about how important he knew Abe's job was, "But if you don't have someone you love to come home to, then you might as well not come home at all."

Abe says, "My job is all I have, outside of my son."

It breaks Celeste's heart to see Lexie cutting herself off. Lexie wonders what she should do, "Ask Abe for a third chance? He's better off without me."

Jett suggests Abe call Lexie. Abe says she doesn't want to see him. Jett can't believe that. Abe says, "The last time I saw her I told her I wanted her gone for all the Days Of Our Lives."

Lexie says if Abe wanted to see her nothing would keep him away. Celeste thinks maybe he's afraid of getting his heart broken.

Chelsea wishes there were some way to show her appreciation. "Actually there is," says Kate, "Don't you think it's time you forgave your mother?"

Nick says he has told the police nothing yet. If Stephanie's involved, she could be in trouble too. He says she can't tell Jeremy about this. Stephanie asks why not.

Nick says because the cops said he would be in trouble if he said anything. He wants Stephanie to tell him if there is anything about Jeremy's actions that seems illegal. Stephanie says she doesn't know of anything. Nick says he is just trying to help. She says he was wrong earlier. He is her friend and may be the only one she has right now.

Kate says Billie made a mistake. She loves Chelsea a lot. Chelsea says she loves her too. "She slipped up," says Kate, "What is even worse is having your child hate yourself for it."

"Are we still talking about my mom?"

"Yes," sighs Kate. Chelsea says she just can't get past it. Kate says once she forgives Billie she will get over it quickly.

Kate tells her, "Nick is a good guy. You don't want to lose him."

Celeste says she knows all about shame and not feeling loved. Lexie thinks that is because of her father and all she put Celeste through. Lexie runs thorough a litany of her sins.

On the outskirts of Salem, a car sits upside down in a ditch. Tek groans, "Lexie? Are you still here?"

Jett asks what Abe would do if he saw Lexie. Abe says part of him would just simply wish her well and send her on her way. The other part would grab her and never let her go and forgive her. He would tell her he loves her and nothing has been the same without her. Another part of him would keel over and faint once he got a whiff of her in that wool cloak in the 100° heat.

Jett asks, "Which part is going to win out?"

"I honestly don't know."

Jeremy meets Stephanie at the pier. She tells him about the police. He wants to know who told her. She says she can't say. Jeremy blows up. He tells her to let him handle this.

Stephanie whines, "What are you telling me?"

Jett has to go to the inquisition. Abe stops him and tells him he was wrong before, "Sometimes you have to go with your heart, and what is right." Jett hopes Abe goes with his heart, too.

Nick comes into the pub. Chelsea bounces up to him and shows him the check. He thinks it's great. She says she didn't want to take it at first. Nick is glad she did. Chelsea talks about everything that has happened in such a short time period including the news about Jeremy's illegal activities and the fact that she and Nick are over.

The lost puppy whines, "Do you still think we're over?"

Lexie says it's different with Celeste. She did what she had to do to protect Lexie. Celeste says the DiMeras controlled Lexie. She wasn't the only one. Celeste runs thought a list of people the DiMeras have controlled. She encourages Lexie not to let the DiMeras control her future.

Kate comes in to see Roman. She sits beside him and pours her heart out.

DOOL Rule #11: If you are pouring your heart out to someone and WANT them to hear what you are saying, they have fallen asleep or are unconscious. If you are pouring your heart out to someone and DON'T want them to hear what you are saying, and think they are unconscious, they are awake.

Kate rambles, "If you were awake you'd probably be wondering what I am doing here. Actually I would like you to know it's not like I knew Sami was raped. Roman, I just wish that I could let you know that I wouldn't wish that on anyone, not even Sami." She tells him about talking to Chelsea and talking about mistakes they regret, "I think I made a big mistake. I don't know why I'm telling you this. Probably because you're unconscious, or because I thought of you as my conscience during the five seconds we were married. I slept with someone over money. I slept with Stefano DiMera."

Roman opens his eyes and asks, "You did what?"

Suddenly the fabric on Kate's chair turns brown., "You're awake!" He stops her from going for a doctor. He begs her to tell him he imagined what she just said. Kate is silent. Roman is judgmental, "Katie, Katie, Katie."

She tries to change the subject. He asks why she did it. She doesn't know, but she did save Myth-Ick. "You're selling yourself again," says Roman, "Take it from someone in a hospital bed, life is too damn short to go backwards. You are not that woman any more, Kate. You're older. My God, I can see it. Why can't you?"

Celeste tells Lexie to open her eyes. They are caught in the middle of the Brady DiMera war along with Theo, "The DiMeras turned Elvis Banks into a rapist and a murderer and you shouldn't want that to happen to Theo. Come out of the dark before it is too late, before that wool cloak you are wearing smells any worse."

Chelsea says they just agreed to take things slow. Nick tells her about talking to Stephanie. He thinks she doesn't have a clue about what Jeremy is up to, but will be keeping her eyes and ears open from now on. He didn't blow Jett's cover. She says, "My grandmother was right – you are a good guy."

"Caroline said that?"

"No," she says, "Kate said it."

Jeremy denies everything. He doesn't know why they are investigating him. He thinks Patch went to the cops. Stephanie says it wasn't him. She turns to walk away, "I need to calm down."

Jeremy grabs her and yanks her, "NO! You're not going anywhere!"

Kate says Roman always saw the good in her even when it wasn't there. Roman says, "You've come along way since..."

Kate interrupts, "Since I was Stefano's whore?"

"Right," says Roman, "You've come a long way since this morning."

Kate says she still has her self-respect. She also says he self-respect standards are a lot lower than everyone else's., "And I got what I wanted. Stefano doesn't control me. I used him and he doesn't even know it. You know what I've always said, I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints." The sinners would rather laugh alone.

"Your choice," says Roman.

"My choice," repeats Kate. She smooches him and leaves. Outside, she tells a doctor Roman is awake.

Abe overhears. He asks Kate how Roman is doing. "He's the same wise guy he always was," says Kate.

Abe asks, "It's that bad, huh?" He goes to the pub to spread the good news. Kate sighs.

Stephanie screams and jerks, "Get you hands off of me!" She tells him it was Nick who told her about the cops being onto him, "He's worried about you."

Jeremy asks, "Then why didn't he come to me directly?" Jeremy bounds up the steps. She asks where he is going. "I'm gonna find out what's going on," he says.

Chelse kisses Nick's cheek and says he is a hero. She suggests they meet at the beach in an hour and talk. She leaves. Nick gives the Tiger Woods hand pump, "Yeah!" He walks out of the pub. China turns and watches.

Lexie removes her hood and walks away. Abe sees her. Staredown. Lexie sweats. FF.


Previews
========

Belle says to Shawn, "This time I want the truth did you go to Indianapolis that day?"

Abe tells Lexie, "You're not a DiMera, dammit. You're a Carver."

China looks down at Nick and Chelsea. She says, "And you... tsk... tsk... tsk... Not even married a month, and you're cheating on me."

Billie holds a file and says, "I got it. It's a baby. Tyler Kiriakis." Phillip lets out a sigh. Shawn and Belle look on.

Colleen loses control, grabs Santo, rips his clothes off and wrestles him to the ground. Just as we are about to pan down into the glowing embers, Colleen says, "Wait! Mr. Dimeeeeera. We can na do this! We must stop and leave right away!" Santo looks over at the pile of rags that was once his clothing and says, "Buta my closa are-a ripped to shredsa." She scolds, "Well, Mr. Dimeeeeera, ye shouldna been so farwerd."

Who Did They Think They Were Fooling?

Thanks to Deb for putting together this Saturday edition of Prevuze...

Since there is sooooo much "drama" (or lack thereof) going on, on DOOL; it's fun to see how TPTB have tried to put one over on us over the years.

I know there are more characters that have been re-cast over the years, but these are some of the most current.

And, of course, we just couldn't resist adding one ourselves...

Thanks again, Deb and hey guys, have a great weekend.

Lust

Patch and Kayla come out of Roman's hospital room. Kayla is worried that he isn't responding yet. Patch tells her to be patient. She thinks it's ironic that the person who had a background check done on his own daughter's boyfriend would tell anyone to be patient. The little Johnson slut herself walks up carrying a load. Patch asks, "Are you taking a trip or something? What are you doing?"

Stephanie says, "No, Papa. I'm moving out."

"Good," says Patch, "Then I won't have to hear that 'Papa' crap any more."

The coroner's team covers Bart's body and works at the scene of his death as Stefano and Rolf speculate about where the key might be. Rolf leaves as Kate comes in. Stefano asks why she is there. Kate gushes. She heard he wasn't feeling well and just came for a little visit.

"Kate," says Stefano, "We've known each other too well for empty pleasantries like that. What are you really doing here?"

"I need your help," says Kate, "You are the only one I can turn to."

Santo says, "I release-a you. Justa walk away now."

"Yer bleedin'," says Colleen. She wants to check him out. Professionally, of course. He tells her since there is nothing more between them, she should walk away now or she might get in trouble. "It wouldna be the feerst time," she says, "nor, I fear, the last."

Hope wonders how different things would have been if Santo had just dropped off the ledge. "Somebody would have saved him," says Sami. Hope asks who. "I don't know," says Sami, some fisherman, Alex North, who knows. But I know he would have been saved because they were fated to be together, and if there is one thing you can't escape, it's your fate. That and long, tedious stories dragging out forever on DOOL."

Stephanie, Kayla and Patch argue about whether or not she should move out. Stephanie says when they are all together, things fall apart and one of them winds up storming out. "She's right about that," says Patch.

"You know what," says Stephanie, "I liked you a whole lot better when you were just a made up bedtime story."

There are still a lot of people who forget I'm a fictional character, though," says Patch.

Kate thinks maybe her timing is bad what with dead bodies lying around the room and all. She thinks maybe she should go. Stefano urges her to stay and fix drinks for them. Kate does, and they talk about Myth-Ick and their kiddies. Kate says she just saw EJ. "EJ," says Stefano, "I don't know anyone by that name." Kate tells him EJ was drowning his sorrows. Stefano points out that it was Lucas who turned Kate in. both of their children have become bitter disappointments and drunks. Kate says she came to ask for money to cover her company while it regroups. Translation: while it goes down the tubes. She assures him she will pay him back. Stefano tells her payback is of no concern to a dying man.

"You look strong to me," says Kate.

"Why did you chose me to help you," asks Stefano, "Why not John, perhaps?"

"I don't feel it's appropriate when you have been intimate with someone," she says.

"I see," says Stefano, "You have no one to turn to."

Kate says she came to Stefano because he has helped her before. "But," says Stefano, "All this time I have been sick you haven't visited me even once.

"Because you were too ill for visitors," says Kate, "Perhaps I should go."

"Is that it," screams Stefano as he flings his drink glass, "Without a dime? Are you not worth even that any more?"

"Business is slow," says Kate.

Colleen tends to Santo's cuts. She collects some dirt, spits into it and makes a paste. Santo thinks that's gross and will only make his wounds worse. She accuses him of being afraid of a little Irish dirt and rubs it on as he wiggles and protests. He tells her there is only one thing that will help him. He grabs her and swings her around onto his lap. She kisses his cheek, he takes the signal, kisses her back and we're off to the races.

Sami thinks Colleen had to keep her options open. Bo reacts, "Whoa, what options? She was committed to being a nun."

"Details... details," says Sami, "You know what sealed her fate? Lust. I think Colleen was done in by lust. Something I know a little bit about."

"Lust," repeats Lucas, "My favorite of all the deadly sins."

Oh, that old cut up Stefano was just kidding around. He wants Kate to ignore any dead bodies in the room and flying glass and stay. He says he's had a rough day. Kate doesn't think she helped it much coming in to ask for money, "I'm so predictable."

"And I am so alone," says Stefano.

"Maybe we can help each other," says Kate. Talk about being predictable... She promises to come back, walks over and kisses his cheek. Stefano goes for more. Kate obliges, "That doesn't seem like the kiss of a dying man – More like the kiss of a dead man."

Stefano says, "I was hoping you would notice."

Doug reads, "I would gladly fall to a thousand deaths to feel your lips on mine. Your face lit by the fire was more beautiful than even a Raphael painting. From that kiss came the promise of a new life with you by my side."

Bo says, "Wow. That must've been some kiss."

"Yeah," sighs Hope, "I wonder what a great kiss would be like."

Colleen and Santo are hotter than the fire beside them. Colleen breaks it off and says they have to stop. "If we stop," says Santo, "That woulda be the same as stopping living."

"Yer a mana the werld," says Colleen.

Santo tells her if he could possibly be satisfied by another woman he wouldn't put her or himself through this, "I only want one thing from you."

"Yea, and don' we know what that is."

"I want you to be free from doubt," he says, "I want you to be a woman, my woman.

Meanwhile, back at the hospital the arguing over who is moving out and who isn't continues. Kayla hits Stephanie with all the problems she will face, such as expenses, the fact that she is supposed to be still in school and points out her airline job isn't steady. Stephanie says all that is covered.

"So," snorts Patch, "You are moving in with Jeremy."

Adrienne pops in and says, "No. She's moving in with me." The hospital is nearly destroyed by the crashing lead balloon.

Colleen cackles, "Ye want me to be your woman. You and yer fancy language, ye should go to Dublin and be an actor. Ye could certainly be in Juno and the Peacock. Yer certainly a peacock."

"I assure you," says Santo, "It's not that small."

"In that case," says Colleen, "You were askin' me to be merely a woman, and I'm askin' you to be rid of that peacock I've been seein' and askin' you to be just a man. My man."

Kate seems to have gotten Stefano's blood pressure moving back up. She thinks maybe they should cool it, because of the audience. "I don't see anyone but you," says Stefano. He goes over to his desk and writes a check. He says he doesn't want what might be their last conversation to end it anger. Kate doesn't know when she will be able to repay him. "We'll keep it as an open account," says Stefano, "And if I go to my just reward, you can keep it."

"You knew why I came, didn't you," asks Kate.

"We are what we are," says Stefano.

Kate turns around and asks the cop if it's OK if she takes Mr. DiMera upstairs, "He seems to be feeling a little tired." The cop OK's it. She goes back to Stefano and whispers in his ear, "Are you sure this is all right?"

"I can't think of a better way to go," says Stefano.

As they turn the corner and head up, Kate says, "I always demand the money in advance, but that's the first time I've ever worked the deal right in front of a cop."

Santo apologizes for being pretentious, "English is not-a my first language."

"Then spake ta me in yer own language," says Colleen, "Yer eyes will tell me whatcher saying." He takes a knee and pours out his undying love in Italian.

"I love it when you talk dirty," says Colleen.

Julie reads on, "The beautiful flow of those words, simple, sincere, and the tender, ti amo."

Everyone in the room gasps and looks at each other. Lucas catches on, "He just dropped the L-word, right?"

"And in Italian," says Julie, "The language of love."

"Oh," says Lucas, "I was still thinking 'Lust,'"

Doug goes into action and turns to Julie, "Ma carissima, would-a you like-a to hear my Italian?" They practically clear the table right there and go at it, but the jeers from the crowd stop things before they go too far.

In the meantime, Tony busts into the pub. Typically, Bo overreacts and rushes him with a gun. Tony tries to convince him he's not Andre and says he just had his hand on the key. Bo wants to know where it is and threatens to blow his brains out. If he's neat about it, that might be a good thing for Bo because if there is one thing he needs it's some gray matter. Once again Tony swears he is not Andre. Bo says, "Well, convince me before I pull this trigger."

Tony says, "How's this..." He smiles big and says, "They're GREAT!"

Adrienne says she's sorry to spring this on Patch and Kayla, but she thought it would be a good solution. As the argument continues, Adrienne says, "I'm staying out of this."

Patch jumps all over her, "How is inviting Stephanie to live with you staying out of it?" Stephanie insists it's all about Jeremy. "You don't even know who he is," snorts Patch.

"Yes I do," says Stephanie, "He's the man I'm going to marry – with or without your blessing."

Patch is speechless. As Kayla's jaw hits the floor and shatters, a voice over the loudspeaker says, "Cleanup on aisle seven."

John frisks Tony. For the moment he stops Bo from turning him into a splat on the wall. Crafty old John says he can figure out whether or not he is really Tony, "I'm going to ask you a couple of questions about your island girls, Lulu and Lilly."

Tony chuckles, "You mean Leelee and Lola?"

That did it. Now everyone realizes this is Tony, except for Lulu and Lilly over in the corner. Bo puts his arm around him and apologizes for nearly blowing his face off. Tony understands. After all Bo is a Salem cop and no one should ever expect anything less than total incompetence from them.

Tony tells them what happened at the DiMera mansion. "Bart ate the key and then Andre skewered him – permanently."

"We gotta cut him open," says Hope.

Cut him open," says John. The crowd says in unison, "Cut him open. Cut him open."

Except for Sami, who goes another direction, "GROSS!"

John makes sure he has his Leatherman. He, Tony and Bo head for the grand opening.

Sami thinks rather than standing around and being sick, they should get back to the letters.

Julie reads on, "I meant to insult you, comparing you to a peacock, to see if I could make you angry and drive you away, to protect my future as a nun. But that future was not to be so easily secured."

Santo asks Colleen if she wants him to repeat it in English. A guy from the audience yells, "NO! We've heard enough!" Santo asks what it is her heart desires.

"Maany tings," says Colleen.

"Love," says Santo.

That sends her running, "I dint say that." He chases her down and turns on the afterburners. He accuses her of being afraid. She insists she is not.

"They why are your hands shaking?"

The paramedic tells Rolf the blade severed Bart's aorta and he bled to death. John barges in and takes charge. He tells Rolf they need to cut the body open, "He swallowed some key evidence." Roof protests but John threatens to run him in for obstruction of justice. He tells the paramedic to do it in the ambulance.

As the EMT's leave, Kate wheels Stefano back into the room. Stefano is much improved. Kate looks up and sees John, "NEXT! "

Colleen can feel everything she ever wanted sliding down the old poop shoot. It's all being replaced by doubt. He's asking her to break her vows. He says that will lead them closer to each other. He wants her to come into his world. She thinks he is leading her into sin. "Love is not a sin," he insists.

"Apart our lives are rich and full," she says, "But here, alone tagedder, we are askin' for nutin' but heartache and eternal damnation."

"A small price to pay," says Santo.

Stefano orders John to leave. "You don't give orders any more, pops," says John, "Someone got killed here tonight. That makes this a crime scene." Kate thinks she should go. John tosses her purse at her, "That's a good idea."

John chases Kate as she leaves and catches up with her outside, "Kate, what are you doing? Have you totally lost your mind."

"No," says Kate, "That was Stefano I was with, not you. Just in case you're interested, there is a lot more life left in Stefano DiMera than you realize. See you later, old friend."

Patch is stunned, "You're going to marry Mr. Steal Money From Kids?"

Stephanie says he hasn't proposed formally, but she knows he plans to and she plans to say yes, "We've talked about it."

"Talk is cheap," says Patch.

"So is your daughter," says Adrienne. Stephanie huffs off.

Adrienne apologizes, "I thought if it was a choice between Jeremy and me, you would want it to be me,"

"No contest," says Patch, "Will you keep an eye on my baby girl?"

"I'll keep two," says Adrienne.

"That's more than I could do," says Patch.

Adrienne leaves and Patch accuses himself of being a rotten father. Kayla just thinks he's overprotective. "I blew it, Sweetness," he says, "I just pushed Stephanie so far away she might never come back."

Stefano tells John Tony and Bart had an argument. John asks about Andre. Stefano says he was drugged but if he sees Andre, he will tell him John is looking for him.

Tony brings a baggie holding the key and hands it to John. "Bart sure had an interesting diet," says John.

"You have no respect for the dead," says Stefano. John wonders what else the key opens beside Bart's chest. He thinks whatever it is will end the feud.

Colleen will pray for Mr. DiMera. She offers to shake his hand and be friends. He will leave, but insists first she call him Santo. She does. He picks her up, whirls her around and asks her to go dancing. She giggles but the mood changes when young OMB walks up and says the sisters need her. As she leaves he asks if she will come. "We'll just have to wait and see, won't we Mr. DiMera?"

Julie says that's the last of this batch of letters. Sami says Colleen was fated to die for love. They were meant to be together. Lucas treads on thin ice, "Then why aren't you and EJ fated to be together? You look like her... he looks like him..." Sami doesn’t think that's funny. Lucas just doesn't know when to stop. The dolt presses the issue until Sami explodes. Lucas backpedals, apologizes and says he took it too far. He hugs her. Sami isn't into it, "Lucas I'm going to kill you."

"Why?"

Lucas last remaining brain cell withers and dies.


Previews
========

Kate tells Chelsea, "You are a Brady and a Roberts, and that is one hell of a combination."

Jett says, "If you don't have someone you love to come home to, then you might as well not come home at all." Abe says, "My job is all I have."

Kate says, "I slept with Stefano DiMera." That jumpstarts Roman's heart, "You did what?"

Stephanie says, "I need to calm down." Jeremy grabs her and yanks her, "NO! You're not going anywhere!"

Shish-Ka-Bart

The Brady clan is gathering at the pub. Sami is amazingly calm after her near murder spree, so apparently the drugs have kicked in. She speculates about the possibility that OMB killed Colleen. "Pop still isn't talking," says Bo.

"That's because they don't have his cue cards ready," says Hope.

It doesn't matter, though, because Doug, Julie, Marlena, John and half of Salem arrive as Doug announces they have a special delivery – the next installment in the Santo-Colleen yarn. Julie holds the envelope containing the juicy tidbits high in the air as they all rush in.

Doug says there are many more still to come, "In other words, they'll drag this out until February sweeps." John asks about Andre. Bo says there is no news but John assures him he will be found. Bo thinks 50 years is too long for a grudge. They talk about Roman. Doug says Roman is too tough for a knife bring him down.

Roman lies near death in his hospital bed, "Coulda fooled me."

Stefano sighs as Rolf comes in. Ralph wants to give him drugs so he won't suffer. Stefano says he won't live in a fog of drugs. He'd rather live in a fog without them. Rolf warns him his pain will continue. Stefano says he needs rest and Rolf leaves. Stefano looks over at the hypo.

Tony watches through the curtains and contemplates Stefano contemplating the needle.

EJ sits in the gutter at the pier. He takes a big swig of JB and spits. "Act like a man," he mocks. He flashes back to his argument with Stefano. Another drink. "Get rid of Lucas," he mutters, "Why not?"

We pause for the standing ovation.

Stefano dozes. Tony starts to come in but hears conversation and scoots back behind the drape. Bart limps in with Rolf. Rolf tells Bart to watch Stefano and call him if he's in pain. Bart picks up the needle and thinks this could kill the pain in his foot. Tony swishes in and gets Bart in a chokehold. He takes the morphine and jams it into Stefano. Stefano thinks he's Andre. Tony tells him to relax so he can search for the key. He rips his shirt open and there it is. Stefano looks up at Tony. The drugs are kicking in. He slurs, "If you do this, I will destroy you with my own hands. I swear to God."

"Don't be silly old man," says Tony, "God and I stopped listening to you a long time ago." He rips the key off. "Finally!"

EJ swills booze. Lucas arrives. He says, "OK, EJ, I got your message. You wanted to see me? It's a matter of life or death?"

"It's life or death all right," says EJ, "Your life and marriage to Samantha are over." Lucas tells EJ Sami said she wishes she had set him on fire when she had the chance and let him burn in his own personal fiery pit of hell. "Really," says EJ as he pulls a gun from his jacket.

BANG!

EJ throws booze on Lucas' cold, dead body, "What's that about a fiery pit, sunshine?" He saves some for himself and takes a drink.

Back to reality. "Kill Lucas, yeah," says EJ, "Samantha's mine – my wife." Swill.

EJ rants about Lucas and drinks. He imagines Sami sobbing over Lucas' dead body. He comforts her, "At least he finally shut up. But I swear we will find who did this, and I will be with you and help you raise the babies. I would do anything for you, Samantha." Sami moves in. Hot kiss.

Back to reality. EJ pines for Sami. Kate finds him and asks if he is all right. He straightens up and claims he's good.

The family sits down as Julie reads, "To meet you on the shore and not in my habit was wrong of me. I was testing myself, praying the Lord would give me the strength to resist temptation. But I had to see you again. The look in your eye had an answer for everything."

Santo meets Colleen. She prays, "Dear God, give me strenth."

Stefano paws at the key. Tony dangles it in front of him. Stefano makes one last grand grab and snatches it. He gives it to Bart. Tony grabs a sword off the wall and demands Bart hand it over. Bart orders him to stand back. "Give it to me now, Bart," says Tony, "One... two... three..." Bart eats the key. Tony screams.

Kate reminds EJ they were supposed to have a meeting to save Myth-Ick. "Easy come easy go," slurs EJ.

SLAP!, " Snap out of it!"

Cher walks up, "That's not the way it's done. Let me show you. You have to scream louder, SLAP!, "SNAP OUT OF IT!"

Kate tells EJ to be a man. He grabs her, "What does that mean? I say treat a whore like a whore."

Kate screams, "Let go of me!" They struggle.

Colleen says she was praying for the strength to leave before Santo came. She accuses him of making indecent advances. He has a wife and son.

"Details, details," says Santo, "But, my wife she a-died three days ago, drat the bad luck. She a-died after years of a-pain, after all, she lived with me. It was a-horrible. Excruciating. Like a DOOL viewer watching flashbacks. His only wish is that he could have gotten Stefano back in time to say goodbye. Colleen wonders how God could take someone like that instead of her. Santo says if he lost her he could not live.

"Aren't yer goin' back fer the funeral," asks Colleen.

"Nah," says Santo, "She won't-a even miss-a me."

He caresses her but she says it's not right. She prays for forgiveness. Santo says she has done nothing wrong. "I've given me life to the chorch," says Colleen, "I want me faith. I can live without passion. It passes."

"Kiss a-me one last time," says Santo, "Once last kiss will prove it."

"It will prove noothin'."

"Come on," he begs, "One for the road." He tells her she is afraid..

"I'm afeereda noothin'," she says.

He says if she kisses him and feels nothing he will walk away, "Neither you nor the Lord a-counted on-a me." Kiss.

Hope reads Colleen's description of the kiss, "I knew once I kissed you, you'd have no choice but to go."

Colleen pants like a dog after a run on a hot day. Santo tells her she has to make a decision and asks if she is going back to the church or stay with him.

She half goes into a trance, "Stay... here..."

"With me," says Santo, "Under the stars... in my arms.

EJ rages, "I am a man!" Kate apologizes. He lets her go. EJ rants. He says neither she nor Stefano had a right to hit him. He tells her to start her own business. She says she can't do that after the bankruptcy. She reminds him they might go to prison. EJ says that's all because of Lucas, "I'll be around to pick up the pieces when he is dead."

"What are you planning now," asks Kate.

Tony says, "Please, Bart, tell me that key is hidden somewhere in your cheek." Bart moons him. "The other cheek," screams Tony.

Bart opens his mouth, "Ahhhhhhhhhh..."

It looks like I have to use the sword," sighs Tony.

Andre says, "What? Skewer an unarmed man? That's hardly fair. It is you who will be shish kabob!" He tells Bart to get out of the way.

"You don't have to ask me twice," says Bart, as he moves behind the couch.

Tony says, "There is something you have that I would like to have that's in your possession."

Andre asks, "What is that?"

Tony says, "My life."

En garde!

Swords flash. Insults fly. Confusion reigns. Bart gets caught up in the mess. Andre jabs and his sword skewers Bart.

Bart reels back. Blood everywhere, "Andre... Why?"

"Just hold on, damn you," says Andre as he pulls the sword out.

Bart turns, falls and looks up at Stefano, "Boss..."

EJ claims he isn't drunk. He says his threat was a figure of speech. Kate thinks it was a drunken slip. He tells her to let it go, "I should have thrown you in the river when I had a chance."

Kate says he can't believe Sami would consider being with him.

Santo says, "Tell me how you feel."

"I will pray for you and Stefano," says Colleen, "Sorry to dissapoincha but the truth is, I felt noothin'." He asks her to wait for the delayed reaction. He holds her wrap out for her to come and get. She stares and then tells him to toss it to her.

"If I toss it," says Santo, "you will lose it to the wind and sea."

She tries to snatch it, "Santo just.."

"Now you call me by my first name."

She composes herself, "Mr. DiMera, I took yer challenge and proved yer not as irresistible as ya believe. Please live up to yer werd."

"I'm-a wounded," says Santo, "When a woman she rejects a man..."

"I think ya should be less casual about opening up yer heart," says Colleen.

Santo says nothing he does is casual. He doesn't do this with other women. She points out he was with her when his wife was dying. He assures her he doesn't chase other women, but he did not know love with his wife, "Now after my lengthy three-day mourning period, I am free to pursue what makes me happy. And that is you." She asks again for her wrap and moves toward him. Suddenly she:

a) remembers the pot roast she left in the oven
b) is attacked by a swarm of killer bees
c) slips and falls passionately into his arms

Please tell me you don't need me to give you the answer.

Andre cheeks out Bart. Bart asks him to call Rolf. Andre apologizes. Stefano watches in a stupor, "Get the key. The key."

Andre asks, "Are you talking bout THE key?"

Stefano says he gave it to Bart and then notices Bart bleeding on the floor, "Oh, no. Who did this? Tony?"

Tony chimes in, "No. Somebody who looks like me."

Stefano can't believe it, "It was you, Andre?"

"It was an accident."

Bart calls out. Tony leaves. Andre follows and watches him go. Stefano and Andre tend to Bart. Stefano begs, "Say something."

"Tony must have the key," says Andre.

"Impossible," says Stefano. He calls for Rolf. Rolf checks Bart out. Stefano wants him to call an ambulance, but Rolf says it's too late. Stefano asks where the key is.

Bart gasps for air, "I took care of it, boss. I always take care of you." He exhales and collapses as he lies in Stefano's arms.

"You can't do this to me," screams Stefano.

Andre comes back, "I lost him."

Stefano tells him he is and idiot for letting Tony get the key. Andre says Tony doesn't have the key. He thinks Bart does. Stefano searches Bart's pockets and tells Andre to search. He looks down at Bart's body, "Oh, Bart, dear Bart!"

EJ remembers Kate telling him Sami wouldn't ever want him, "You have no idea." He imagines being in bed with Sami. Sami says she hopes it's always like this. EJ asks, "Do you miss Lucas?"

"Who?"

They giggle and he asks for her forgiveness. "I forgive you, dearest, and I know you will be a wonderful father," she says she has never been this happy. They attack each other.

Back to reality. EJ asks, "What am I waiting for? It'll make us both happy. No more wasting time. Lucas' life ends today, and mine begins!"

The crowd at the pub mulls. Sami is distant. Marlena asks what's wrong. Sami says the more they read about Colleen the more she feels for her. Hope butts in. Sami says it seems like Colleen had her life ahead of her and it fell apart. Marlena thinks it might have come together in a new and surprising way. Sami thinks women are lead by their hearts, good or bad.

Julie reads, "I can't remember if I left the scarf or if you kept it back..."

Colleen and Santo embrace. Colleen begs for him to let her go. Santo says she chose to stay. She grabs the scarf. He stops her and kisses her.

Colleen erupts, "Yer an egotistical libertine!" She yanks again and Santo loses his balance. He falls over the cliff and hangs there, right next to Alex North. She huffs, puffs and drags him back up. She apologizes. He says it wasn't her fault. He was teasing her. He should have respected her decision, "Now walk away. You saved my a-lifea. I shoulda respect you wishes. Go. Don't look back. GO!" FF Colleen.

Previews
========

Patch asks, "Are you taking a trip or something? What are you doing?" Stephanie says, "No, Papa. I'm moving out." Kayla looks on.

Sami asks, "You know what sealed her fate? Lust. I think Colleen was done in by lust." Lucas smiles.

Stefano plants one on Kate. She says, "That doesn't seem like the kiss of a dying man." Stefano says, "I was hoping you would notice."

Bo points a gun and says, "Start talking before I put a bullet in your head." Tony says, "It's Tony." Bo says, "Well, convince me before I pull this trigger."

Mad Dog

Jeremy and Stephanie meet in the pub. They hug and Jerko asks how things went with the old man after he left. "Be glad you bailed when you did," says Stephanie. She debriefs him on how things went with Patch. She says he ordered her not to see Jeremy and then she let him have it. She's decided she's moving out and suggests moving in with Jerkemy. Blood drains from Jeremy's face like water dropping over Niagara Falls.

Nick meets Chelsea at the dock. She's surprised. She thought he would be on his honeymoon right now. He says Vegas is a blur and, as far as he knows, he's single and available. She tells him she made a mistake trusting Jett.

EJ asks Stefano if he can get him a newspaper. Stefano accuses him of being solicitous and consorting with the enemy. He tells him he is an embarrassment and orders him to go somewhere else and mourn the lost twins. Stefano says he couldn't care less about being a father – it's Sami he wants. "I have nothing left," says EJ.

SLAP! "Act like a man," growls Stefano, "Where is your self respect?"

"I guess I left it at the scene of the rape," says EJ.

They defibrillate Roman. Sami completely wigs out, and does a few laps around the halls of the hospital snivelin' and snifflin'. Marlena tells Sami and Lucas Roman has excess fluid on the heart. Sami totally freaks, "They've killed him! They've killed him! Even If he pulls through, they will come after him again! I'm gonna do something!"

Stefano mocks EJ and calls him a disgrace. EJ says Stefano has forgotten what it is like to feel passion for a woman. Stefano tells him a man of passion is a man of action. EJ asks, "What does that mean? Am I supposed to pull her off by the hair?"

"If that's what it takes," says Stefano, "I also suggest you take Lucas out of the picture."

Lucas tries to calm Sami down. Outside the hospital, a bum sits on the railroad tracks and tries to stop a speeding locomotive as it comes toward him. The bum is a lot more successful than Lucas. They wheel Roman out of his room. Sami puts on another show. Marlena tells Lucas to keep an eye on her. The doctor interrupts Marlena. Meanwhile, Lucas has lost track of Sami and runs around looking for her. Check the psych-ward first.

Chelsea tells Nick Jett lied to her. She blabs about his undercover ISA job, "He has a badge and everything. He's investigating a certain business partner. I can't believe I was so wrong about him. He's been leading me on. He hung out with us just to get the dirt on Jeremy." Nick thinks the situation must be bad if the government is involved. Chelsea tells him Jett wants him to get the dirt on Jeremy.

Jeremy calls the hospital and asks for the defibrillator to be sent over immediately after Roman is done with it. He tells Stephanie, You had me going there for a while." He grabs a paper and goes through rentals. He paints a great picture of Stephanie living in a wonderful apartment with a fireplace, "I could come over on cold winter evenings and we could be naughty."

"If we lived together," says Stephanie, "we could be naughty all the time. Think about how much money we could save... one electric bill... one heating bill... one shower... one bed...

"One grilfriend...," thinks Jeremy. He says he doesn't think living together is such a good idea.

Nick asks, "Was Jett peeved when you said no?" Chelsea says she couldn't say no. Nick asks if Stephanie is involved and then takes it back, "Of course not." Chelsea says Jeremy will do whatever he can do to protect himself including throwing Stephanie under the bus. She wonders what if Jett is using her again to do his dirty work.

Jeremy presents the case for not rushing things. He says he loves her and wants them to live together someday. He says she is special and he doesn't want to screw it up. He wants to take it slow. He wonders if she is just doing this to peeve her dad, "This would give him more ammo against you." Stephanie agrees, she doesn't want to make her dad an enemy for life. Jeremy puts the finishing touches on his argument, "When we do move in together I'm kind of hoping it's as husband and wife."

Lucas runs through the hospital yelling for Sami. Marlena asks, "Lucas, what's the matter?"

Lucas says, "She took off."

Marlena asks, "What do you mean she took off?"

Lucas says, "She's gone. I think we both know where she is headed."

We sure do," says Marlena, "For a complete breakdown."

EJ wonders how killing Lucas could win Sami. Stefano says he didn't say anything about killing. Stefano says EJ is a disappointment to him. The doorbell rings. Stefano screams for Bart to get it. Bart runs out with a napkin stuck in his collar eating a piece of pie. He drops the pie and starts to clean it up. Stefano screams, "The door, you imbecile!"

Bart runs to the door and opens it. He sees Sami standing there, "Well, if it's not Rocky Graziano.

No, it's Mad Dog Brady-Roberts. She sticks a gun in his chest and tells him to get out of her way.

That did it. Stephanie melts, "JEREMY, ARE YOU PROPOSING?"
Speaking of Graziano, Jerkemy backpedals like a prizefighter on the ropes, "NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT." He pulls out his copy of the Sleazeball's Compendium of Handy Dandy Excuses and starts firing them at her, "We're too young to get hitched. We have a good thing going. We shouldn't screw with it." She wonders how she can afford rent and tuition at the same time. "Forget the tuition," he says, "You'll never go to class anyway. I know! Go cold turkey on shoes. You spend a fortune on them. And I'll cover what you can't pay. I'm doing pretty well right now." He smooches her and leaves before she has a chance to bring up any more disgusting talk of a marriage proposal.

Stephanie sighs and picks up her phone, "Aunt Adrienne, it's Stephanie. I have a problem. I have to see you."

Chelsea asks what she should do. "Go with your gut," says Nick.

"I should have trusted you instead of Jett," she whines.

Lucas rants about having left Sami alone. He wonders what she could be thinking. Marlena says, "She's thinking about the family she failed."

Lucas says, "That's not true."

"Sami doesn't know that," says Marlena.

Stefano continues ranting to EJ and says the Bradys will get their just rewards. The Duchess of Death drags Bart in. She rants and tells them the gun is Roman's, "You remember him, don't you? The gun is here to make sure justice is served." EJ tells her she will regret this.

"Oh, no," says the Blonde Butcher, "I promise I won't regret this!" Stefano orders Bart to disarm her. Sami turns as Bart rushes her.

BANG!

Bart whimpers, "She shot me! She really shot me! Call Dr. Rolf!"

The Godmother whirls the gun back toward Bart, "SHUT UP!" Bart immediately clamps his hand over his mouth.

Sami The Beast Brady rages, "My father is in the hospital. He could have died because of your family and this feud." Stefano tells her to put the gun down.

"I've decided it's time for justice," says Sixgun Sami, "It takes two DiMeras to make up for one Brady. I've decided it's time for justice so I'm going to start with you, Stefano DiMera."

Chelsea says Nick only lied to her to protect her. Nick finishes the thought, "And my job." He says he wasn't honest about a lot of things. He tells her about reworking the DNA test. She's glad he told Sami and Lucas, and thinks they must be thrilled. He also tells her about getting fired. He offers to help her out with Stephanie. She doesn't want him to.

Jeremy comes up, "Did I interrupt something?"

Adrienne meets Stephanie at the pub. Stephanie cuts to the chase and asks if she can move in. She makes her case. It would be temporary and just a place to sleep. She vows to be a neat freak, and Adrienne would have a built in house sitter. Adrienne asks about her parent's suite. Stephanie insists it is too small. She feels like she has been getting in their way, so now she wants to get in Adrienne's way.

Adrienne says she has to talk to Patch and Kayla first. She starts to call. Stephanie stops her.

Stefano asks, "So this is the woman you love, Elvis?"

Mad Dog barks, "CAN IT, STEFANO!"

Stefano asks if EJ is going to stand there and let her kill him, "I thought I raised a man!"

EJ starts to say something but Shotgun Sami interrupts, "SHUT UP, EJ! I will kill you." She vows to shoot every DiMera. EJ begs her to settle the differences peacefully. He tells Stefano they can end the vendetta.

"I submit to no one," shouts Stefano, "If Samantha wants to shoot me, I will make it easier." He walks up to the barrel of the pistol, "Go ahead, my dear, pull the trigger. You cannot miss."

Adrienne wants to know what is really going on. Stephanie tells her about the fight earlier, "It was about Jeremy." Adrienne says she thought Steve was cutting Jeremy some slack. Stephanie tells Adrienne about Jeremy's record. Adrienne can understand why Steve is so concerned.

Stephanie says, "OK, he's not exactly Mahatma Gandhi. But why won't anyone cut him a break?"

Upon seeing Jeremy, Nick launches into a dissertation on earthquakes, "The largest quake ever actually happened here in the US. It was along The New Madrid fault, accent on the first syllable."

Jeremy cuts in and hands Chelsea her paycheck, "I understand there are rumors floating around about me. From now on, get your facts straight before running off to Stephanie."

Stefano says, "You won't be the first Brady to commit murder."

"SHUT UP," screams the Salem Slayer.

Stefano eggs her on, "Even a trained seal could make this shot."

EJ begs her to back off.

"Say goodbye, Stefano," snorts The Enforcer.

She starts to pull the trigger.

"Here I am to save the day! That means that Mighty Mouth is on the way!" In sweeps Lucas through the doors behind her with Marlena following. He whirls, twirls and pulls her away. EJ yanks the gun from Baby Face Brady's hand as she screams and flails.

Stefano orders, "Destroy them Elvis! Destroy them all!"

Adrienne says Patch is just trying to protect Stephanie. He's trying to make up for lost time. Stephanie needs for Patch to trust her. Adrienne asks where she will turn when she gets hurt. Stephanie says when she gets hurt she'll just know better for the next time. Adrienne says she can move in on one condition, "Every night we share a bowl of popcorn and Leno.

"Can't we each have our own guy," asks Stephanie, "I have just one tiny favor to ask, will you be there for me when I move out of my parent's place?"

Adrienne says, "Please don't make me regret this."

Chelsea says she was just trying to protect Stephanie. Jeremy says, "That's what boyfriends are for. Don't spend this all in one place." He takes off.

"What's that," asks Chelsea, "a threat?" Nick says that's why she should let him handle Stephanie. Chelsea asks, "You would do that for me?"

Nick says, "I would do anything for you. Don't you know that by now?"

The Terminator screams for them to give her back the gun. Marlena says Stefano is responsible for all the violence. Stefano says it would be nothing but self defense if EJ shot them all right now. He orders Elvis to kill the whole bunch. EJ unloads the gun and hands it back to Miss Thrillkill, "Go home, Samantha."

Stefano says EJ is a coward. EJ screams, "GO HOME!" They drag The Ripper off screaming, "Stefano will pay for this if it is the last thing I do."

Nick and Chelsea share a hug on the pier. She makes him promise to get out if Stephanie gets suspicious. Nick asks if they are "friends" again. She says yes but asks him not to propose again. He asks her to go for a cup of coffee. "If I have coffee, I'll be up 'till dawn," she says.

"That's OK by me," says Nick, "It'll give us more time to... "talk." Translation: Not very subtle. No translation necessary.

AS they walk away, Danielle strolls onto the dock and lights a cigarette.

Adrienne says she has to tell Stephanie's uncle what's going on. Jeremy walks in and Stephanie tells him about the move in. Adrienne asks about his parents, and then leaves.

Jeremy tells Stephanie live-in relatives can really suck. Stephanie says as soon as she's living there it will get Patch off her case. She has decided it will be good not to be around Jeremy because that will just make him want her more. He says that's not possible and smooches her. She pushes him away and looks at everyone else in the room, "JEREMY!"

"Hey," he says, "I don't see a sign saying 'no PDA's allowed.'"

Stefano says EJ has cut the cord, "Andre will take care of the Bradys and may God have mercy on your soul."

Sami 'The Beast' Roberts cries and cradles the gun. Charleton Heston comes up and unwraps it from her cold, live fingers. Lucas asks if she wants their children to be born in prison. Mad Dog demands a family meeting. Lucas and Marlena try to delay it. Marlena gets a call as Slobberin' Sami begs Lucas to have the meeting so they can figure out what started the vendetta. Marlena turns and announces Roman is out of surgery. The basket case gasps and asks how he is. "He's a very strong man," says Marlena.

"Oh thank God." FF the tower of tears.


Previews
========

Tony has his hand on Stefano's throat. Stefano says, "If you do this, I will destroy you with my own hands."

EJ leans in and says, "I would do anything for you, Samantha." Sami moves in. Hot kiss.

Tony says, "There is something you have that I would like to have that's in your possession." Andre asks, "What is that?" Tony says, "My life."

Santo says to Colleen, "Stay here. In my arms."