Thursday, August 31, 2006

That First Sami Post-Wedding-Fiasco Night

John slaps Eve's autopsy report on Abe's desk and gives him the details. It's nothing they don't know already. A couple of gunshot wounds did her in, "Forensics did make one interesting observation. Her badge is missing." Abe and John speculate on why this might be.

"Regardless of the motive, we have a cop killer out there," says Abe.

Tek runs in, "A cop killer? What happened?" John tells him about Eve.

Lucas consoles unshaven Austin, "I've been there. That first Sami post-wedding-fiasco night is tough. I didn't see this coming. Sami is usually the one left at the altar. Don't tell me you're falling for the 'I'm not worthy' rant, are you?"

"I don't know."

"I know Sami is insecure but not when she's marrying the man of her dreams. I don't know what's going on here."

A note lies on the floor just inside Sami's door.

Sami sleeps and cries. A figure walks into her apartment and sneaks across the room. He stands over a crying Sami, who looks up and goes wide-eyed. SCREAM!

Tek and John talk about Eve's death. "Two bullets at close range," says John.

"I'm surprised you didn't know," says Abe, "It happened on your watch." Tek explains about the suspicious figure at the church. He says he left detective Post in charge and went to meet a friend. Abe smirks, "So you left the investigation to meet Lexie. Isn't that right?"


Scruffy Austin thinks Sami wasn't thinking straight.

"When does she ever think straight," asks Lucas, "She's changed, though, because of you."

Austin drones, "What the hell happened?"

"I don't know," says Lucas, "I jut got a thought. Maybe it was a test, to push you away to see if you will come back begging. She thrives on that kind of thing. She's so insecure. You know she has always been jealous of Carrie."

"I did beg and plead with her," says Austin, "Something made her have doubts. It wasn't a game."

"I shouldn't mention this," says motormouth as he mentions it anyway, "I'm thinking about EJ. I wasn't going to say anything as he says it anyway... I have a feeling he is really starting to get to her."

EJ says he didn't mean to startle Sami. She says she had a nightmare. She dreamt someone was trying to kill her. She bawls in EJ's arms.

Tek admits he went to see Lexie. Abe couldn't care less. Tek goes on to say Sami got another threatening call telling her not to marry Austin, "She and EJ went over to Lexie's house and threatened her."

Abe either misunderstands or someone got his lines screwed up, "What reason would Lexie have to threaten Sami?"

John says, "Partner, there is something you have to know."

Austin wants to know if Lucas thinks Sami is falling for EJ. Lucas says it's just a feeling he has, "EJ is always around. It's like he pulls a rabbit out of the hat for her whenever he's there. He's the night on the white charger for her. It makes me sick."

Austin says, "You sound like you are jealous of him."

Lucas rambles on, "You remember he told you to treat her right. He said he'd be watching you. What the hell did he mean by that, huh? Then he offers his apartment so she can shack up the night before your wedding. She could have stayed with her mom or a lot of other people."

"I know it was ridiculous," says Austin.

"That eliminates any possibility you will ever be a DOOL writer," says Lucas.

"It gave her peace," says Austin, "You think he worked his English magic so she would leave me? You remember the night before you were going to marry her, Sami spent the night with Brandon? The truth was she only had eyes for you. I just don't see how you can say that about her again. They are friends, nothing more."

Lucas just doesn't give up, "You got to admit they were gone a long time before the wedding. I wonder what really happened."

Sami tells EJ that was the worst nightmare of her life. She dreamed someone was chasing her with a knife. EJ assures her she isn't going to die and anyone who tries to kill her will have to get through him first. EJ gives her tea. He says it is his nanny's secret recipe. Sami can't believe he had a governess.

"A regular Mary Poppins," says EJ.

Sami thinks EJ makes a lot of things better, but he can't do that for her life. Sami says 'Mary Poppins' was her favorite movie. She talks about her childhood with John Black, "The truth is he was a great dad to me. It's a long story. He and my mom had an affair. They had Belle and my twin brother and I started feeling unwanted. I have a lot of happy memories, but their affair made it impossible for me to trust people."

"You trust me don't you," asks EJ.

"Yeah, I do," says Sami, "So... I told you about my childhood but you never say anything about yours."

"I just told you about my nanny," says EJ, "I was lucky. There was no crisis this tea could not make better. It's special. Try it."

Sami gulps, "Wow, that is good. What is in it?"

"A spoonful of sugar..." Sami laughs. EJ goes on, "A number of different ingredients, the primary one being love, and obviously a little sap, too. At least that's what nanny used to say." He serves the breakfast he brought over for her, I prepared 'la specalitie de la maison' – toast."

EJ says he should have knocked first. Sami says she remembers locking the door. He, of course, used his spare key. He apologizes. Sami can't believe she didn't get married yesterday, "Austin and I didn't spend last night together and we will be alone for all the Days Of Our Lives."

"Are you sure it's over," asks EJ.

Tek says Lexie wanted to come clean but got a threatening call herself, "The mechanical voice told her something bad would happen to you and Theo."

Abe goes apoplectic, "My life is in danger and so is her son's because of her stupidity and she didn't warn me!"

Tek defends her. Abe is peeved that Lexie confided in Tek but not him. Tek thinks Eve's death is related to the phone calls, "There is a real danger out there."

Abe hyperventilates, "I should have remembered from her past she can't be trusted. She's a DiMera and is capable of anything."

That did it! Tek grabs Abe's throat, "You SOB! Don't talk about her like that, or I will kill you!"

Austin rambles about Sami's pre wedding hijinx with EJ. He thinks something besides EJ stopped her from marrying him.

Lucas has another random thought, "Maybe she thinks you are still in love with Carrie."

"I love Sami," says Austin.

"Not as much as you love Carrie," says the little social engineer.

"Carrie is your wife," says Austin, "There is no point in talking about this."

"You gotta tell Sami if you want her to be your wife," says Lucas.

Lexie comes into the pub. She orders coffee and egg croissant to go. Then she walks over to Austin and Lucas' table and tells Austin she is sorry about what happened at the wedding, "I'm probably not the first person to tell you this, but Sami leaving you at the altar is the best thing that could have happened to you."

"Except for you leaving me at the table right now," says Austin.

Sami insists it's over between her and Austin, "If Lexie tells, Will will never forgive me." Sami is convinced Lexie made the call, "She's a DiMera. That family makes me look like Mother Teresa. Aside from you and Tek, nobody else knew about our little arrangement."

EJ can think of a couple people who wouldn't want Sami to marry Austin, "Myself for one." Sami soaks in the effect of the nuclear blast.

Tek threatens Abe. Abe warns him to let go. John tries to mitigate things, "It's a real bad move, Tek, you're gonna lose."

Tek slowly saunters out. John says, "Abe, you gotta get beyond this."

"You're right," says Abe, "At this moment Tek Kramer is the least of my problems." Roman comes in and announces the case just got more complicated. He's been going over the surveillance tapes from the church, "We might have a shot at the killer."

Abe asks, "And... Did you find anything?"

Roman says, "I'm afraid I did. Something you're not going to like."

Austin insists he's in love with Sami and Sami is in love with him.

"She has a strange way of showing it," says Lexie, "You're lucky you didn't marry that witch." Lucas suggests she let it go. Lexie ignores him, "If either of you had the slightest inkling... Sami can't be trusted OK?"

"The slightest inkling of what," asks Austin, "You know something you're not telling us. What would that be?"

Sami is shocked. EJ explains. He thinks her marrying Austin wouldn't make her happy. Sami says she thinks it would have. EJ thinks Sami shouldn't have to be someone else, "Austin thought you should be your sister."

Sami whines, "Why do people have to keep reminding me she is the love of his life?"

"You need to settle down with someone who loves you," says EJ, "And that man is not Austin."

"Is that all," asks Sami.

"What do you mean," asks EJ.

"Nothing," says Sami, "I don't know what I mean."

EJ takes it to a new level, "You want to know if I'm falling for you." Sami assesses the effect of the second nuclear blast in a row.

Lexie backpedals. She insists there is nothing she is holding back. She was referring to the way Sami blackmailed her. She knows what she did was wrong, but they had no idea how Sami tormented her.

Lucas says Sami was worried about Abe. Austin presses. He thinks Lexie is hiding something else. Lexie says it is her medical opinion that Sami is pathologically disturbed.

Lucas says Lexie isn't a shrink. Lexie says she knows the signs of a mentally ill person, "After all, I live in Salem. I see them every day." Austin shuts her up. He's not listening any more. He's glad she had the decency to stay away from the wedding.

Roman shows Abe and John the tapes of the wedding. We watch Lexie walk in. We follow her through the church. Then we watch her leave. "What the hell," says Abe.

Roman makes one of his usual brilliant deductions, "Her actions aren't those of a guest who arrives late and leaves early. I have to treat her as a suspect."

Abe understands, "We all know the DiMeras hate the Bradys and Lexie hates Sami. Could you please just remember that Lexie is Theo's mother?"

"I will treat this with the utmost care," says Roman, "Which is why you should complete the investigation."

"Are you falling in love with me," asks Sami. EJ stares.

Sami discovers the note. EJ picks it up. Staredown. Sami doesn't want any part of it.

"You can't be serious," says Abe. Roman thinks Abe is the only one who can do this. John agrees. Roman says they need someone Lexie will trust. Abe doesn't think this is a good idea. Abe thinks they are suggesting he start dating Lexie. Yes they are. Abe sighs.

Lexie tries to wiggle out of things. She claims she was just saying Austin deserves to be with a woman who truly loves him, "That woman is out there."

Lucas' mouth is on autopilot, "My brother is not giving up on Sami."

EJ says he will get rid of the note. Sami stops him. She decides she has to know what it says and asks him to read it to her.

"You don't have to do this."

Sami is numb, "Yeah, I do. Besides, there isn't anything left to take away from me, right?" Au contraire, mon cher.

EJ reads the note, "Samantha: Congratulations. You did the right thing by not marrying Austin. Now there is just one last act you must carry out to keep your secret safe. You must hand over custody of will to Lucas."

Sami blows her stack, "WHAT?! I am not giving up my son! I can't! I won't!"

Abe thinks this is crazy. Roman puts on the sales pitch, "If she wanted to kill a cop maybe she had Eve right where she wanted her."

Abe says Lexie isn't capable of murder. Roman says they have to eliminate her as a suspect and find out why she was sneaking around the church.

"So what if she's not guilty," asks Abe, "Do I just toss her out like yesterday's news."

"That is your call, partner," says John.

Roman says he needs Abe's help. He plays his trump card, "If you don't want to do it for the force or for me, do it for Theo."

Austin swears he won't give up on Sami. Lexie says he will regret it for the rest of his life, "She doesn't deserve you. Let her go."

"Goodbye, Lexie."

Austin leaves. Lucas turns on the oral afterburners, "That was a nice try, but they will get back together today. There is nothing you can do about it."

Sami freaks. She's not giving up her son, "He's my little boy. I can't lose him."

"Look at me," says EJ, "We're going to figure out a way out of this. We will get through this together."

"How," asks Sami, "All they want to do is see me lose everything."

"I'm not going anywhere," says EJ, "I'm going to be here for you." Closer... Closer.... Kiss. Sami pulls him in. FF on the note.

Prevuze wishes John Aniston a quick and full recovery from his recent heart attack. We want Victor back soon, making life miserable for Salemites. Click Here for the story.

Roman says to Marlena, "Listen to me, OK? What kind of a message is that going to give your daughters if you don't do this?"

EJ says, "You never did answer when Lucas asked you to tell me how happy you are in your marriage." Carrie says, "Didn't I?" EJ says, "No, you didn't."

Sami says, "Carrie is in love with you. You are in love with her." Austin says to a blonde (this is possibly Carrie, but it's hard to tell), "It's about time we got back together the way it was meant to be." Carrie and purses her lips.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Eve of Destruction... Destruction of Eve

Belle and Phillip arrive back at their apartment. Phillip says Abe is investigating the file SNAFU.

Belle asks, "Do you really think someone is out to get us?"

Phillip asks, "What else could it be? If you haven't been with him he couldn't be Claire's father."

"Well," says princess Belle, "I wouldn't be incapable of a virgin birth. I wonder what Shawn thinks about all this?"

"I suspect he's sleeping," says Phillip, "He won't be surprised about them calling the wedding off. Sami is the kind of girl who has no idea how to handle success."

"I think she's still in love with Lucas," says Belle.

"That would be a good reason not to marry someone else," says the blockhead. Make that blind blockhead.

They go back in the apartment to find Maggie in a mess. "Oh no, she got you," gasps Belle.

"It was a full scale attack," says Maggie, "That baby has quite a pitching arm." Maggie claims they both wore each other out and Claire is now asleep.

"Claire is a picky eater," says Belle

"She doesn't take after you," says Maggie.

"When I was little I was a human garbage disposal," says Phillip.

"Well Claire didn't inherit that gene from either of you." Dead silence. "What," asks Maggie, "Did I say something wrong?"

Bonnie rushes into Mimi's apartment and yells, "Lexie told me Shawn saw the file that says Claire is his daughter." Mimi shushes her.

John wants to know what officer Evil Michaels is doing there.

Tek says she's on his investigation team. Eve says she found a couple of footprints outside the church. John asks to see them.

EJ comforts Sami. Sami thinks she humiliated Austin and can't tell him why. She thinks the mystery caller was Lexie and maybe she should have called her bluff and married Austin anyway. EJ says it's not a bluff and whoever is doing this is deadly serious. He asks if Sami told Roman about the mystery phone call. She tells him she didn't.

EJ says Sami should be proud of what she did, since she walked away for the sake of her son. Sami says, "Every time I get close to someone, I end up doing something that ruins it and I don't know why."

"I believe that's a question for your mother the psychiatrist," says EJ, "Don't try and analyze yourself. On the other hand, according to Einstein the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results."

EJ offers to drive her home, but Sami reminds him his car is broken, "Who would think that getting thrown in jail with a couple of prostitutes would be the highlight of my wedding day?"

EJ imitates the look on officer Peter's face when he found out Roman was Sami's father. Sami giggles as Marlena walks in. Marlena asks, "What's going on here?"

John says, "The footprints are a good clear set. Good job, Eve. We need to keep this quiet for now." Eve assures him she can be discreet. Tek leaves.

Eve says she looks forward to working closely with John, "Very closely."

Sami tells Marlena EJ was just trying to make her feel better. Marlena asks to talk to Sami alone. EJ leaves. Marlena says she is surprised Sami is so upbeat. Sami assures her she feels awful and there is nothing between her and EJ, "He's my friend. The only one I have in this town."

Marlena asks why Sami called off the wedding. Sami says she loves Austin enough to let him go. She had reservations about marrying him, "When he put the ring on my finger it seemed so final and I realized I wasn't ready. And we probably never will be."

Marlena says, "Sami, that's very grown up. I think maybe you could have found a moment alone with Austin to share that information though." Marlena asks if anything else is going on with Sami. Sami picks up her ring and asks why she can never be the first choice.

Marlena says Lucas and Austin cared enough to propose to her. Sami reminds her she ruined it every time, "Guys fight over Belle, Carrie and you."

"That proves it once and for all – guys are stupid," says Marlena.

Sami wonders what's wrong with her. Marlena assures her she is beautiful, intelligent strong.

"I'm not strong enough to do the right thing," says Sami, "I am the bad seed."

"You are not."

"Me and Eric were like cast offs," says Sami.

"Eric who," asks Marlena.

"It's no wonder he doesn't want to live in Salem," says Sami, "I shouldn't need my mom all the time to make me feel better, but right now it does make me feel better to have you here."

Marlena says she is glad she is there. She asks if anything else is going on. Sami says there is nothing else. She wants to be alone. Marlena understands. She will be there for her and loves her so much. "I love you, Mom." Hugs.

Marlena leaves. "Well," says Sami, "Now it's time for the real moment of truth."

EJ comes back in. Sami asks, "EJ, will you help me end this night right?"

Bonnie wants to know why Mimi shut her up. Mimi tells Bonnie Shawn is asleep in the bedroom. "You mean he's not with Belle and Claire living happily ever after," asks Bonnie.

"He doesn't believe what is in the file," says Mimi, "Shawn and Belle don't think they ever had sex."

"That's because doing it with Belle would be the same thing as never having sex," says Bonnie, "I remember the worst sex I ever had, and that was 15 years ago. But I digress."

Mimi says, "They think someone is playing a sick joke on them."

"Those pesky writers," says Bonnie, "At least we dodged another bullet."

"No," says Mimi, "We dodged a guided missile. As far as they are concerned Claire belongs to Phillip."

Belle tells Maggie they are just tired. Maggie couldn't believe what happened at the wedding. She thought Austin would be the one to call it off through. "Do you know why Sami got cold feet?"

"No," snaps Phillip, "And we don't care." Maggie decides she had better go.

After Maggie leaves, Belle asks Phillip, "What upset you?"

"That Claire didn't inherit her eating habits from us," says Phillip, "It's been a long day. I'm going to take a shower and go to bed." He staggers upstairs as Belle thinks. Smoke rises.

Eve says she wouldn't ask Officer O'Malley if it wasn't important. O'Malley agrees. He will cover for her. She can go home early and get ready for her hot date with John.

Eve goes over to John and he says he'll be at her apartment to pick her up and take her out. "Maybe we don't need to go anywhere," says Eve.

Marlena walks up, "Hi there. This must be the girl you've been dating. Nice to meet you. I'm Mrs. John Black." Eve turns to look at John.


The doorbell rings at Lexie's house. She answers it to find Sami and EJ. She starts to slam the door but EJ blocks it with his foot and they invite themselves in. Lexie yells for them to get out. Sami confronts Lexie about the calls. Lexie says she doesn't get it. Sami screams, "You tell me who else could have called and threatened me except you!"

Bonnie can't believe it, "After worrying so much about this, it fizzles like a bum firecracker on the Fourth of July."

Mimi says, "Shawn and Belle think they never slept together. They have as much information as we do. Why the hell do we think they are wrong?"

Bonnie does a reality check, "Do you think they are wrong?"

"No," admits Mimi, "That's just the way my luck goes. Phillip thinks this is all made up."

Bonnie says, "As long as everyone believes they were never together you are home free and with a clear conscience to boot."

"I pray you're right," says Mimi.

Lexie says she showed up at the church to see if Sami had the guts to go through with the wedding. She considered incriminating Sami but had too much to lose, including her license to practice medicine. Lexie asks how EJ can stand to be with manipulator Sami.

EJ smiles, "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else."

John reminds Eve not only are he and Marlena separated, but he also told her that. Marlena is shocked. She says she told him the separation was temporary. He tells her to stop acting naïve, "If you are free to hook up with your ex, I am free to see whomever I want. Tonight it's Eve." He walks Eve out as Marlena seethes.

Bonnie is glad everything is out in the open. Mimi says she bargained with God. She told Him she would tell Shawn the truth if Shawn recovered. She thinks God bought it but couldn't tell for sure since he was laughing so hard. Bonnie reminds Mimi someone else has told Shawn, "You are absolved. Free of guilt. What more can you do? You can thank God it's finally over."

"Now that the seed has been planted Shawn will keep thinking about it," says Mimi.

"That's nothing to worry about since Shawn has the attention span of a mayfly," says Bonnie.

"Phillip thinks the same person who switched the embryos is the one who messed with the file," says Mimi.

Bonnie gasps, "Are you saying he thinks someone did the on purpose?"

Belle and Phillip's apartment is dark. Phillip comes downstairs with Belle and says Claire is back down. Belle asks if everything is OK. "It's just the thing with the file," says Phillip, "It's not easy to know someone is trying to hurt us."

"Not easy," says Belle, "But we do know Claire is yours."

Phillip gets ideas, "Did I tell you how beautiful you looked tonight?" Kiss.

"EJ believes in me," says Sami.

"If he really understood you he would drive away," says Lexie, "Which would be pretty damn fast right? Get out while you still can, EJ. Sami is a thrill you don't want."

"You don't need to worry about me, Dr. Carver," says EJ, "I am always looking for the next rush. It's no surprise I am attracted to Samantha." Sami drops her jaw.

John tells Marlena not to get the wrong idea about Eve, "It doesn't mean anything."

Marlena is shocked that John would be interested in Eve. She reminds him he has been sending her flowers.

"That should prove Eve doesn't mean anything to me."

Marlena speculates, "You're working on a case."

"What gave you that idea," smirks John, "I like seeing you jealous."

"I have ways of getting answers out of you," says Marlena. Kiss.

EJ tells Sami he finds her attractive, and he has told her that before. Sami says she always thought he was just being nice whenever he said that. EJ thinks he has found a kindred spirit in Sami.

Lexie jumps in, "Do you know what kind of fire is burning in her soul? If she has a soul. I feel sorry for you. When you offered that donation I thought you were one of the good guys."

"That doesn't stop him from being my friend," says Sami.

"You know what's interesting," says EJ, "We aren't that different – you, Sami and myself. We all like to live on the edge."

Lexie protests, "That doesn't describe me at all."

"Really," says EJ, "So what was that thing Sami had on you that she was able to blackmail you?"

John melts in Marlena's arms. Marlena asks, "Well, do you want to change those plans for tonight?"

"I can't."

"Well then," says Marlena, "I was right, wasn't I?"

"You're always right," says the diplomat.

"Well, there is that," says Marlena.

John explains this is about the evidence. With any luck he'll be able to prove Bo wasn't responsible, "You know, years ago, Bo and Hope, Steve and Kayla, you and me... we would have been working on something like this together."

"And probably using the same tired old script, too," says Marlena, "So, do you want me to put on my police psychiatrist's hat for you?"

Yes," says John, "And that cute little French maid's costume you wear sometimes, too."

"What would Eve have to gain," she asks.

"Money," says John, "And apparently she needs it desperately. I'm going to find out who she is working for."

Belle and Phillip lie on the couch. "That sex was so good I can actually remember it," says Belle.

Phillip can't believe yesterday at this time he was drinking with Shawn. He's glad he is there with her – and happy, "I have an idea. The state fair is going on. I think we should go." Belle says Claire has a doctor's appointment tomorrow, so they can't go to the fair. Phillip suggests the carousel at the mall after they both take Claire to the doctor. Belle wants to know if Phillip really wants to go since this is a miserable thing for Claire to go through. She's not sure Phillip wants to see her like that.

Phillip says, "As a parent you take the bad with the good, the mother with the daughter."

"A Vivian Alamain only comes around once in a lifetime," says Bonnie. She and Mimi discuss who might have done it. Mimi points out Victor can be vicious, "Think of all the enemies the Brady's and Kiriakis' have. We Lockharts don't amount to enough to have enemies."

"OMG," says Bonnie, "You know who hated all of them? The DiMeras! Even through Stephano is dead and Tony is in jail, they have an organization. I don't like the sound of this. And you are stuck in the middle of it. You could be in terrible danger."

John assures Marlena he will be OK tonight. He's just going to try to find out who is lining Eve's pockets. He asks about Sami. Marlena thanks him for getting her to the church on time.

"Not that it mattered in the long run," says John.

Marlena is glad Sami called off the wedding. John caresses her. Another kiss. They leave before things heat up.

Lexie thought EJ was more of a gentleman than to say something like that. She insists she wasn't out for a thrill with Tek. She thought Abe was dead when it all started. Now Sami is threatening her again. Sami insists she didn't send the note. Lexie says she didn't make the call, "Be afraid... be very afraid that someone else knows our dirty little secret. And this someone can do a hell of a lot more harm than I ever could."

Sami says, "I didn't tell anyone else."

"You told EJ," says Lexie.

"He's my friend," says Sami, "And Abe knows better than anyone else – Once a DiMera always a DiMera. If you think you'll get away with these sick little games you have another think coming." They leave.

Belle looks at Claire in her crib. Phillip watches.

Bonnie tells Mimi, "This is serious. You and Shawn need police protection." Mimi thinks Bonnie has been watching too many Law and Order reruns.

Bonnie doesn't think so, "These sickos start out small but before you know it they are eating your liver with a nice Chianti. I'm serious. Whoever took the trouble to switch those embryos is capable of anything. Well, maybe except being a DOOL writer. It takes a real scumball to stoop that low."

Tek meets Lexie at the dock. He wants to know why she is upset. She tells him Sami got another call threatening to expose her secret. She didn't tell Sami about the call she got. Lexie thinks things are getting out of hand. She's worried about so many people who could get hurt.

Marlena and John walk outside the church. Marlena is chilly, "It might rain. That will make it cozy for your date."

"I hope so," says John.

Marlena didn't like that. John covers his tracks, "Studies have shown confessions are more likely during a rainstorm."

Marlena buys it at first, but smacks him once she thinks it over, "You made that up." Slap and tickle ensues.

Slap and tickle comes to an abrupt halt. HORROR!! John stoops down to examine the body. Cold and dead and full of bullet holes.

"This is turning into the Eve of Destruction," says Marlena.

"You got it backwards," says John, "It's the Destruction of Eve."

John gasps, "Oh Evey."

After reviewing episodes from the past several months, the NBC Quality Assurance Department has recommended the name of this show be changed from 'Days of Our Lives' to 'Plan Nine From Salem.'


Abe smirks at Tek, "So you left the investigation to meet Lexie. Isn't that right?"

Lexie tells Austin, "Sami leaving you at the altar is the best thing that could have happened to you."

Roman says, "We might have a shot at the killer." Abe asks, "And... Did you find anything?" Roman says, "I'm afraid I did. Something you're not going to like."

EJ tells Sami, "You want to know if I'm falling for you."

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

The 180°

Tek is a man on a mission. He runs around the church playing cop. He radios his men and says he was tracking the suspect but lost him. Apparently he wasn't playing cop too well.

The endless ceremony continues as father Jansen blesses the rings. Lexie looks on. Kate can't believe the wedding is happening.

EJ is philosophical, "We must accept the things we cannot change, Kate."

Austin slips the ring on Sami's finger as Carrie practically breaks into tears. Sami is really nervous. She drops Austin's ring, picks it up and struggles to put it on his finger. She freezes, holding the ring in front of his finger.

The audience holds its collective breath. Lexie watches. Sami whimpers.

Will cheers from the peanut gallery, "Go for it, Mom."

Austin says, "Samantha..."

Sami cries, "I'm sorry. I can't go through with it."

"What's wrong," asks Austin.

Sami bolts back down the aisle and falls. Lexie smiles her wicked smile. Roman tries to help her, but Sami screams at him to let her go as she runs out of the sanctuary.

Marlena asks what happened. Roman says he knew something was up. He tells Marlena about his conversation with Sami when they were standing in the vestibule.

Austin tells the crowd to calm down. He doesn't know what happened. He tells them not to go anywhere and insists they are getting married today. He goes to talk to Sami as Lexie watches with delight.

Kate tells EJ she prayed for this and her prayer has been answered, "I don't care why it happened. I'm not going to have that witch as a daughter in law."

Bo wonders, "Why do Sami's weddings always end up like this?"

"Better the wedding than the marriage," says Hope. The object lesson goes right over Bo's head.

Marlena worries. She thinks she should have spent more time with Sami during the last few weeks. She just doesn't know what could have caused Sami to do this.

"I am just as clueless as you are," says Roman. "And I have no idea why Sami did this, either."

John is with Tek. John says, "This is the second time St. Luke's has been targeted during a wedding. Who's behind it?"

Tek says, "I don't know. We have reason to believe everyone inside could be in danger."

Austin goes to the bridal room door. He knocks and asks Sami to open the door. She cries and tells him to go away, but then she opens the door and tells him he can't change her mind, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I did this – that I let it go this far. I don't deserve to wear this dress or have you waiting for me at the altar."

Austin says, "More than any woman I know you deserve to have your dreams come true. I love you."

"You can't," says Sami, "You have to get over any feelings you have for me. I am so embarrassed. I should be struck by lightning. I took sacred vows. I am so ashamed."

Austin tries to calm her down. He says this is a new start for them. Sami bawls. Austin tries to convince her. Sami twirls the ring and says she will never put it on his finger. She takes hers off and asks him to take it back. Austin stares.

Caroline feels so sorry for Sami. Shawn treasures the memory of their wedding, "It has nothing to do with the wedding. It's just that I'm getting so old I treasure anything I can remember."

Patch says, "From what I've seen of Brady weddings so far, this is pretty typical."

Bo asks Roman what John and Tek are doing in the vestibule.

Roman says, "How would I know? I'm just the commander." Bo tells Hope to keep her eyes peeled as he heads for the out of the sanctuary.

Stephanie says to Max, "From what Mom tells me this happens with Sami a lot. Should you be sitting next to me? Chelsea looks pretty jealous." Chelsea stews.

Phillip and Belle wonder what is going on. Phillip says, "I think Austin is the lucky guy today."

Lucas can't stand what this is doing to Will. Carrie says, "We still don't know what happened."

Lucas says, "She got stranded with EJ."

"You think something happened between them," asks Carrie.

"I don't know."

The brat overhears and says, "Maybe Sami realized that she's really not the woman my Uncle Austin loves."

Austin won't take the ring. He insists they are getting married. They can fix whatever is wrong. Sami says she isn't worthy of being his wife. Austin says he is ready to give her his heart. Sami refuses. She says she hasn't changed, "I am a fake. Not all the time, but doing the right thing is hard for me. I'm always afraid I'm going to lose somebody and I make choices that hurt people. I am not good enough to be married to you."

"You are acting out of fear," says Austin, "You think you won't be able to live up to your ideal of what a wife should be. I don't want a perfect woman. I want you."

"You don't even know me," cries Sami, "I am on my best behavior when I am with you because I want you to love me. If we got married you would see through that. I am not going to do that to you."

"We live and work together," says Austin, "I think I know you pretty damn well."

"The woman you talked about in those vows is not me."

"How can you say I don't know you," asks Austin.

Sami says, "I know you and I hope someday you get to be with the woman you really love." She hands the ring back and closes his hand around it, "I can't explain now. Please just give me some time alone... Please go away, Austin." She runs across the room and cries.

"OK," says Austin, "I will go for now, but this is not over." Austin leaves. Sami blubbers.

Roman, Bo, John and Tek have a confab. Tek tells Roman Lexie doesn't know who called with the threat.

John asks, "Why do I get the feeling you know more about this than you are telling us?"

Tek sighs, "Sami made a secret pact with Lexie. Sami promised to keep her mouth shut about our affair if Lexie would lie to Carrie. Sami blackmailed her into telling Carrie if she had a kid with Austin it would be born with birth defects.

Roman goes through the roof, "DAMN! I thought Sami had finally gotten her act together! I would guess that's why she called off the wedding."

John says he isn't concerned with that. He wonders how the mechanical voice knew Lexie and Sami had a pact.

Tek says he doesn't know. He asks them to keep what they just talked about a secret, "Lexie was warned not to say anything. She was threatened. They said they would go after Abe and Theo."

Roman says the bottom line is they have to find out who is behind the threats. He tells Tek to call the crime lab to go over the church. Bo and John go to look around.

The brat piles on, "Sami was Uncle Austin's second choice. Maybe she wanted him to be with someone who was his first choice."

"Go mind your own business," snorts Lucas. The brat turns on her heel.

Carrie says she can't believe the brat said that about Austin. Lucas says he doesn't care what the brat said, "I spoke to Austin about your relationship with him in the past and he said it was over. It's obviously over for you because we're married. He's moved on, too. That's why we're here. I just can't figure out why Sami left him at the altar."

Austin comes back into the sanctuary, "I have an announcement. I'm sorry to have to say this. As of now the wedding is off. Hopefully, that will change, but not today."

EJ says, "Try not to look too happy Kate, out of respect."

The crowd mills around. Kate hates to see Austin hurt, "But he will get over it and he'll be better off with a life that doesn't include a harlot as a wife."

"A harlot," says EJ, "You're right. With you as a mother, that would be one too many harlots in his life. We all have our faults. Beautiful as you are, yours are many, I'm sure."

Kate smiles, "Well, I think I could forgive you for that insult if you take me dancing."

"We'll dance," he promises, "But now, I have a friend to take care of – Sami. She is my friend and I have to see that she is all right."

"My mom is a freak," wails Will, "She blew it again. She will never change." Lucas assures him they will fix things.

Carrie hugs Austin, "I am so sorry." Lucas watches. For one of the few times in his life, he is speechless.

Carrie asks how Austin is doing. "I have seen better days," says Austin, "I tried to tell her how much I want to marry her but she is too upset." Carrie asks if there is anything she and Lucas can do. Austin says, "Give her a ride to her apartment. I will find a new place."

"You can stay with us," says Carrie.

"I'm not up for company," says Austin, "I'll stay at a hotel. Maybe tomorrow we can straighten things out."

Marlena wonders if something happened before Sami got to the church. She starts to go see her but Caroline suggests she give Sami more time.

Lucas says, "I don't know why Sami pulled this 180°." Austin says she thinks she isn't worthy of him, "Sami just needs some time."

"Just don't give up on her, OK," says Lucas.

Roman goes in to see Sami. Sami cries, "Daddy... Daddy..." Hugs.

Jennifer tells Frankie she's starving. He suggests Chez Rouge. They say their goodbyes. Patch tells them there isn't much point in hanging around.

Max says, "On the track you look good. Off the track you look amazing. Did you sign with Austin's new company?"

"I signed," says Stephanie, "I'm afraid you will have to eat my dust."

Belle tells Marlena they can talk tomorrow as she and Phillip leave.

Billie tells Austin she isn't surprised it happened but she is ticked off about the way Sami did it. Austin doesn't want to hear it.

Billie asks, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Help me figure out Sami."

Sami cries she tells Roman she is sorry, "I'll bet Kate is thrilled."

"Don't think about that right now," says Roman, "I have been drying your tears since you were a little girl. I guess that will be my job for life. Do you want to catch me up on this particular Patch of trouble?"

"I couldn't take the pressure," cries Sami, "Austin wanted a 'me' that doesn't exist. You know I can't change that much."

Roman sees through it, "Do you want to tell me what really made you run out?"

"I did tell you," she insists, "Austin and I couldn't spend all the Days Of Our Lives with me being someone I'm not.

"I think you did the right thing," says Roman.

"I had to," says Sami, "Now I'll never be with Austin and I'll never be happy."

"The secret to happiness is you have to be willing to be happy," says Roman, "You have never learned that lesson. You've always been in too big a hurry. You reap what you sow in this life Sami."

Roman leaves and hooks up with John and Bo. John asks, "Did Sami come clean?"

"Not even close," growls Roman, "She told me a bunch of stuff which is probably true, but nothing about why she blew off the wedding. Dammit! I just wish to hell I could tell Carrie what I know. What a sick thing for Lexie to be blackmailed into doing. I don't know if the truth would have made any difference but it's too late now. We have to keep the secret."

Bo leaves. John goes to look around. Roman sighs.

Patch offers Kayla a ride home. She tells him yes, and asks if the wedding made him remember anything. He says no, "I'm really tired of making you feel bad. You think we should cool it for a while?"

Kayla mumbles, "You don't think you're gonna get rid of me that easy, do you?" They leave.

Bo and Hope walk out. Billie follows.

Austin thanks OMB and Caroline for coming. They leave. Austin falls in a heap in a chair. Kate comes over and tells him she loves and supports him, "but what Sami did was a brave thing. Your marriage would have been a mistake."

Austin insists, "Things aren't over between us." He walks away.

Carrie overheard and asks Austin if he meant that.

Sami is back in civvies. EJ walks in. Sami stands up and whines, "Where have you been? I've been stalling this whole time waiting for you. I thought you would never come."

Tek and Eve talk. John asks what she is doing there. No response.

Lucas tells Will he is sorry. Will doesn't exactly take it in stride, "Nobody else I know has such a crappy life."

"We will get through this," says Lucas, "Even your mom."

"What if she doesn't," whines Will, "What if it's worse than ever?"

Austin tells Carrie, "I asked Sami to marry me. I'm sticking to it. But if after we talk she doesn't want to go through with it, I will have to go my own way." Lucas watches.

Sami has been waiting to tell EJ what happened. She tells him about the phone call – If she went through with the wedding the mechanical voice would tell everyone what she did.

"I wish I had known," says EJ.

"I didn't know what else to do," says Sami, "I went out there and thought I might get away with it. Then I saw Lexie. All I want is for my dad and son to be proud of me. Obviously, I think my dad has given up on me. But Will told me today he is proud of me. I couldn't risk losing him. If he found out he would never forgive me."

EJ hugs her, "Things look bleak and dreary now but they will work out. I'll make sure of it." Sami cries like a baby in EJ's arms. FF.



John stands with Eve. Marlena walks up, "Hi there. This must be the girl you've been dating. Nice to meet you. I'm Mrs. John Black." Eve turns to look at John.

Lexie tells Sami, "You should be very afraid that someone else knows our dirty little secret. And this someone can do a hell of a lot more harm than I ever could."

Bonnie tells Mimi, "I'm serious. Whoever took the trouble to switch those embryos is capable of anything."

Monday, August 28, 2006

The End Of Time Approaches

Bonnie the candy-striper pesters Lexie about Shawn's condition. She has kept calling Mimi, but can't reach her, "So I thought I'd get the scoop straight from the horse's mouth... so to speak." Lexie tells her Shawn was feeling much better when he went home, "But he needs peace and quiet and rest. Bonnie doesn't understand why he went on a bender. Lexie points out he has a history with alcohol, but Bonnie shrugs it off as being something that happened when Jan was around. She wonders if Shawn's drinking had something to do with the IVF SNAFU.

Fortunately for Lexie, Tek comes in. Lexie excuses herself and goes over to talk to Tek. He tells her he doesn't have any new information about the case, but he thinks she is onto something with the Brady connection.

The audience stands at the church as the bridal march plays. They stand... and stand... and stand... throat clearing... staring... nothing...

Kate thinks this is beginning to look like another Sami wedding disaster, but doesn't want to get her hopes up.

Lucas revs up his mouth. He leans over and tells Austin he knows Sami can't wait to marry him.

Austin asks, "Then what is going on back there?"

Back there, Roman tells Sami she doesn't have to go through with the wedding if she doesn't want to. Sami is very distant. Roman asks again. Sami says she knows what she wants to do.

The crowd waits. Kayla tells Patch she should have known this would happen. She thinks the crowd showed up at the wedding for the same reason people go to disaster movies.

Kate whispers to EJ, "I was annoyed with you at first for not keeping Sami away from the church, but now I'm going to have a front row seat for her downfall."

The brat whispers to herself, "I can't believe I took the day off to come to this stupid wedding. It's probably the only day off I will have all summer."

Sami says she is just nervous. Roman says it's a big decision. Sami claims she loves Austin and wants to get married. She wants to go on with the wedding. Roman hugs her as Sami cries.

Frankie and Jennifer wonder what's going on, but decide the wedding will go off without a hitch. After all, Sami doesn't have any husbands lurking around out there who might show up to put a damper on things like Jennifer's wedding.

Sami appears at the sanctuary door. Loose lips Lucas goes into action. He leans over to Austin and says, "Sami always knew how to keep a guy waiting."

Sami smiles and walks down the aisle in slow motion. Her heart pounds. She practically hallucinates. The audience distorts. It's like John Black on a bad trip. Roman hugs her and gives her hand to Austin.

Austin asks Sami if everything is OK. Just peachy. Father Jansen starts the ceremony. Sami puts on a brave face. Lucas stares at her.

Tek speculates. He thinks Tony may be involved. He has connections outside prison, "It could be anybody, though, since Roman and Bo have put so many people behind bars." He thinks Sami's wedding is a place for things to come down, "It might be a ploy to get all the Brady's together in one place."

"Sami's wedding is a lot more logical place to get Brady's together than at a Mensa meeting," says Lexie.

Tek tells Lexie he has sent plainclothes officers to the church and is on the way himself. He promises Lexie he will let her know how it goes.

Father Jansen rambles on about Austin's virtues. He turns to Sami, "As for Samantha..." he clears his throat, but talks about her tender heart and her love for Austin.

Kate stews. The totally conspicuous plainclothes heavies walk in. Father Jansen talks about Sami's transformation, "Samantha has embraced God's plan for her and that is a true..."

"Miracle," says Sami. The audience chuckles.

"I was going to say blessing, Samantha," says the good Father, "You are now about to reap the rewards of God's blessing."

Lexie gets a page and picks up. Tek tells her the ceremony has begun and so far things are quiet. She tells him to be careful. "It's nice to hear you care about me," says Tek.

Lexie picks up a bullhorn and announces, "Of course I care about you, Tek." Abe listens and gives her a look that would kill a cow. An unfaithful cow.

Lexie tries to explain. She says she is concerned about Tek. Abe rants. He doesn't care about Tek or her feelings for him. She insists she is not still seeing him. He says he has moved on and she should too, "I don't believe you, anyway. You are free to cozy up to anyone. It's not like we have any ties."

"We have a son," whines Dr. Slut, "That should count for a lot."

"Your actions made it clear Theo doesn't count," he turns to a nurse and tells her he's investigating the file. The nurse says she was on duty, but doesn't know anything. Abe wants to speak to the doctor who was on duty that night.

"That would be me," says Lexie, "So I guess you will have to spend some time with me anyway."

Father Jansen prays, "May we bear witness to their love..."

Marlena comes to the podium for the responsive reading. After Marlena finishes, Will goes over and reads Paul's definition of love from First Corinthians. "There is something else I'd like to say," says Will, "I'm really happy for them. I'm glad Austin will be my stepfather. I've grown up. I see now that my dad and mom love each other, but that's not meant to be. I can see how happy Austin makes my mom and I think she makes him happy, too. A lot of times my mom hasn't made the right decisions. A lot of times she didn't handle things so well. This past year she has worked hard to not let stuff get to her. I didn't think she would be able to do it but she has. She has become the person my dad and I knew she could. Turning your life around isn't easy but mom has done it big time."

He walks over to Sami takes her hand, "I hope you and Austin have a long and happy marriage. You're the best." Hugs and tears.

Abe questions Dr. Carver. Lexie has no idea how the file wound up in Shawn's room. No one realized it was missing until Belle found it. She doesn't know what time that was.

Abe drones, "Could you check your records for that, doctor? I guess this incident doesn't say much for hospital security."


"These things happen sometimes," says Lexie.

"As the doctor on duty, did you notice anything unusual that night?"

"Yes," says Lexie, "A couple came in to have a baby. He was the actual father and she was the actual mother. Dr. Berman was here also."

"I'll talk to him, don't worry," says Abe, "So you don't know anything?"

No," says Lexie, "And I have no knowledge about how the file got in Shawn's room either. I think someone wanted Shawn to see the information in it. I checked with the lab and they claim the information is legitimate, but Shawn and Belle claim it couldn't be true."

"Do you know how long the file was there before Belle found it?"


"Could you provide me with a list of personnel on duty and visitors?"

"Doctors and hospital personnel," says Lexie, "but not visitors. Let's see, Shawn's parents were there... Belle, Phillip... Billie Reed and Chelsea..."

Abe asks to see the file. Lexie touches his hand as he gives it to him. Abe pulls away and asks if she has a copy of it. She says she does. "In that case," says Abe, "I'm going to take it and analyze it for prints."

He starts to leave. Lexie says, "Hey do you think we could..."

He cuts her off at the knees, "I'll get this back to you as soon as I can." He asks for names of everyone who has access to the files.

Bonnie overhears and asks what's going on. Lexie tries to brush her off, but Bonnie presses. Lexie blabs it all, "When Shawn was here, Claire's medical file was found in his room..."

Bonnie asks, "What?"

Sami and Austin share their personal vows. Austin talks about when he came back to Salem. He never dreamed they would be together like this, "I couldn't be happier."

Kate stews, "I couldn't be unhappier and soon you will be joining me there, Austin."

Austin says Sami has never given up, and watching her has inspired him. He knows she is a loving and responsible mother. Will is a proud of her, as he is, "I stand here before God, our friends and family to say how honored I am that you have agreed to be my wife. Chuckle - I will do my best to respect our differences - chuckle. I will love and support you and I hope we will be happy all the Days Of Our Lives."

Sami's voice cracks, "Austin I – I don't think I can do this."

"Mumble mumble mumble," says the crowd.

Kate is delighted, "My God, I don't think this wedding is going to happen."

Austin tells her she doesn't have to be nervous. Sami agrees it's nervousness. "Just say a few words and we'll move on," says Austin, "Four words will be fine – 'I love you, Austin.'"

"I want to do this," says Sami, "Austin, you believed in me when no one else would. Even when I made dumb mistakes you were willing to give me another chance. You were understanding and treated me with respect. You are a really good man. I haven't met a lot of real life heroes but you are one of them. Just like my dad and my mom."

Sami turns to Roman and Marlena, "I admire you both so much. And. of course, we have to talk about Will. I am so proud of the man you have grown up to be. You still have faith in me and I want to make sure you never regret that. Austin, I am so glad to be marrying you today. I want to make sure I never disappoint you."

Austin takes a trip into Fantasy Land, "There is no chance of that."

Bonnie spills coffee as she presses for details. Lexie tells Bonnie Mimi and Belle both know about the mix-up. Bonnie panics and runs out screaming.


Abe has a firm grasp of the obvious, "This is a hell of a mess."

"Bonnie could make it even messier," says Lexie, "Shawn doesn't need the excitement." She asks Abe if he has to go. Abe has to get back and change for the reception. "Be careful," says Lexie.

"What," says Abe, "Are you afraid I'll get beaned with the bridal bouquet?"

"No," says Lexie, "But it is a Sami Brady wedding, after all."

Abe sighs, "I was hoping Carrie and Austin would get another chance. Things just don't work out that way."

Dr. Tramp whines, "They can."

"Not for us," growls Abe, "Carrie and Lucas are married and in just a few minutes, Sami and Austin will say their vows." Abe leaves.

Lexie schemes, "I wish there was something I could do to stop that."

The oh, so inconspicuous plainclothesmen stomp around like a heard of buffalos as Abe checks their positions. Tek is on the phone, "Keep your eyes on all the entrances, windows too. We don't know who we're dealing with or what his MO is."

John looks toward the back of the sanctuary and grunts, "What the hell?"

Marlena asks, "What?"

John shrugs it off, "Nothing."

Austin and Sami join hands. Austin repeats his vows. Then Sami.

Father Jansen asks the big question, "Does anyone here know of any reason why these two should not be united in holy matrimony?"

Interminable wait...






Tek arms his pistol. He runs around the church pointing it at nothing in particular.




Everyone waits for an answer. Kate has an answer. She whispers to EJ, "How about everyone?" EJ asks if a Sami wedding has ever made it this far. "No," snaps Kate.

The universe expands, contracts, and expands again. The end of time approaches... "Very well," says father Jansen. He asks for the rings. Lexie sneaks in the back of the sanctuary and has a staredown with Sami. FF Sami.


John says, "This is the second time St. Luke's has been targeted during a wedding. Who's behind it?" Tek says, "I don't know. We have reason to believe everyone inside could be in danger."

Patch says, "I'm really tired of making you feel bad." Kayla mumbles, "You don't think you're gonna get rid of me that easy, do you?"

The brat says, "Maybe Sami realized that she's really not the woman my Uncle Austin loves."

EJ walks into a room. Sami stands up and whines, "Where have you been? I've been stalling this whole time waiting for you. I thought you would never come."

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Welcome To Salem II


Welcome To Salem


Friday, August 25, 2006

It's Showtime!

Roman tells Marlena she looks great. She returns the complement. Roman is glad the wedding is finally getting started. Marlena tells him she feels like Sami isn't marrying the right man, and Austin isn't marrying the right woman. They figure they shouldn't second-guess the bride and groom. "You really do look beautiful," says Roman.

John walks up behind them, "And I was about to say the same thing."

Caroline rants about alcohol poisoning, "These people who own pubs and allow that kind of thing to happen should be shot." She's glad Hope decided to come to the wedding. Hope tells her not to read too much into it. Caroline and OMB go off to help Sami.

Belle wonders why the brat asked why Phillip and her were still together. The little snot backpedals and says she wondered what Belle and Phillip are doing at the church instead of helping with Shawn at the loft. Phillip assures her Shawn is in good hands.

The brat asks if everything went OK at the hospital. Phillip wonders what she means and tells her there was a little snag with the paperwork. After they leave Billie asks the brat what that was all about. She says Shawn is her brother and she was asking because she cares for him. Billie rolls her eyes as the brat walks off.

Tek runs into Lexie at the hospital. She asks if he is stalking her. Tek tells her he is there on police business. Tek starts to kiss her but Lexie pulls away like a scared rabbit. Tek tells her Abe is as responsible for her predicament as she is. Lexie says she is talking about more than their hot little affair, "There are a lot of other things going on here, too."

Tek asks, "What do you mean?"

Lexie says, "I mean that we all could be in for a whole lot of trouble."

Kate is still hopeful Sami won't show. Austin insists she will. He thinks something must have happened. Kate stops him as he goes to find her. There is a knock at the door. A greatly disappointed Kate opens the door to see Sami standing there, "Sorry I'm late, Austin, but I'm here now and ready for a wedding." Big hug.

"Betcha thought I wasn't going to make it," says Sami.

"The thought crossed my mind," says Kate.

Sami turns to her and says, "Sorry... MOM."

Sami tells them what happened. There was no way she could call. Sami says she wouldn't miss marrying Austin. Austin feels the same way. Sami knows nothing can keep them apart.

Kate points out the groom saw her before the wedding. Sami says she has already used a lifetime worth of bad luck. Sami leaves to get ready. Lucas pins Austin's wilted flower back onto his lapel.

Kate seethes, "If she calls me 'MOM' once more..."

"You'd better get used to it," says Austin, "This wedding is going to happen."

Marlena tells John she is feeling stronger already, "It's amazing what a few days away from you can do for a woman." John hopes he can move back into the penthouse soon. Roman suggests he not pressure her. John is so grateful.

Hope says that was an awkward moment with Caroline and OMB. Bo says her his parents want them together.

"It's not their decision," says Hope, "It's ours."

"Actually, it's yours," says Bo, "I have to go talk to John about an investigation."

"Here at the wedding," asks Hope.

"It's very important," says Bo.

Frankie and Jennifer come in and we have a hugfest with Hope. Jennifer asks if Hope and Bo are together. "Sort of," says Hope.

Jennifer fills Hope in on Jack's condition. Frankie takes a hike. Hope asks if it's strange living in a threesome. "A little," says Jennifer, but I get good advice from Mickey.",

"Legal advice," asks Hope.

"No," says Jennifer, "Advice about living in a threesome. What about you and your situation with Bo?" Hope stares.

Stephanie, Kayla and Patch walk in. Patch is a little uncomfortable in a tie. Kayla thinks it's got to be difficult being there with all the people who know him when he doesn't know them. "Hey," says Patch, "Free food, right?"

Belle wants to know why Phillip stopped her from telling Billie and the brat about Claire's hospital file.

"Because it's ridiculous," snaps Phillip, "I don't want my sister and my niece to find out about it because then my mom will find out about it and it will really start to snowball. I don't know who is responsible for this, but I will bet my entire trust fund that whoever is, is the same person who switched the embryos."

Lexie has filled Tek in about the flaky file. She tells him Phillip thinks it is part of a conspiracy. Lexie thinks he's right. She drags Tek behind a curtain to talk. She thinks the person interfering with the clueless quad is the same person who made a threatening call to her.

EJ joins the wedding party. He apologizes for being late. "At least you got her here," says Austin.

"I can't believe my car broke down," says EJ.

"Neither can I," says Looselips.

Jennifer thinks things are looking up for Hope and Bo whether Hope wants to admit it or not.

OMB and Caroline are happy to see Frankie there with Jennifer, Hope with Bo and Steve with Kayla.

Kayla, Patch and Stephanie enter the sanctuary. Stephanie leaves and Billie joins them. Billie brings up the dart game. She's ready for a rematch.

"Just get me out of this suit first," says Patch.

DeAnna notices Sami's Chloe-face. Sami tells them how she got it.

"Your hair looks like you've been through a car wash," says DeAnna.

"That's what you're here for," snorts Sami. She begs DeAnna to help her look more beautiful than ever for her trip down the aisle.

Right out of the blue, Marlena asks Sami if she really wants to marry Austin. Sami says of course she does, especially after all she went through to get here. Marlena says that's exactly what she is talking about, "Sometimes we put obstacles in our path and it's a message from our subconscious." Sami runs through the litany of thinks her subconscious did not do, like cause EJ to get a speeding ticket, have his car break down and start a thunderstorm, "Nothing is going to stop me form marrying Austin."

Tek asks Lexie about what threatening call she got. She tells him she got the call just as she was about to expose Sami. She doesn't know who it was.

"Was it a man or woman," asks Tek.

"Neither," says Lexie.

Bo tells Patch and John Hope is giving their marriage a second chance. John assures him he is on the case, but Bo's marriage might have a chance anyway. Patch says he got a good piece of information that might help.

Stephanie and Max bicker about who will win the Salem GP. Max wants to bet. Stephanie says, "That's a violation of our ethics clause, but if you don't want to bet money..."

Max sees the brat, "I have to go. My date is here." Max tries to talk to the little snot, but she is distant. Max asks, "Is this about the paternity secret?"

The brat is shocked, "Abby has such a big mouth!"

Max ignores it, "Did you tell the people involved who the father is?"

"I left the file where they could find it," says the brat, "Noting happened, and I'm going to find out why."

Lucas' mouth runs around like a loose cannon. He wonders how EJ's car broke down if he is a professional driver. EJ says he pays too much attention to his racecar and not enough attention to his personal car.

Marlena gives Sami an old bracelet from her grandma. Carrie gives her a new garter. Belle let's her borrow the pearls, and she has the new earrings from EJ. Everyone ooh's and ah's over the earrings as DeAnna says she has to finish Sami's hair.

Sami tells Belle she heard about Shawn's little drinking escapade. Belle says Shawn is OK. Sami wonders if everything is OK with Belle. No it's not. Sami asks DeAnna to leave so she can hear the juicy details. They have so much time. DeAnna huffs out. The brat starts to walk in but eavesdrops through the door as Belle tells the girls about the mysterious file. Belle insists Shawn can't be Claire's father.

"You wish it were true," says Carrie, "I can see it in your eyes, Belle. You wish that Claire was Shawn's baby, don't you?" The brat listens in.

Max comes up to Stephanie. She invites him to sit with her during the ceremony, "If you don't mind sitting next to the next winner of the Salem GP."

"You have been breathing too many gas fumes," says Max.

"Then maybe I'd better not sit next to you after all," she says.

Bo asks Patch what he found out. Patch wants their word they won't bust him. Once they give their word, Patch tells them a geek buddy of his back in Cincinnati did a hack-attack on Eve's bank account. "I didn't hear a word you said," says John, "So what did you find?"

"Guess who made a hefty cash deposit the day after that surveillance disk went missing," says Patch.

"Eve was involved," says John. You can't put anything past superspy.

"Now we have to find out who paid her off," says Bo.

Speaking of whom, Kate tells EJ if he was going to delay Sami, at least he could have kept her occupied until the wedding was called off.

"Come, come now Kate, you're assuming I kept her late on purpose."

"Don't play with me," says Kate.

"Now, there's an idea."

"I have a feeling if Sami and Austin do get married, you're not going to be out of the picture," says Kate.

Belle tells the sisters Phillip is determined to find out who messed with the file. The brat eavesdrops but rushes off as Will and Lucas come to the door. Will comes in to wish his mother his best, "I just hope nothing goes wrong."

Lexie tells Tek the threatening call came from a mechanized voice, "It said if the information came out about Sami, it would hurt Abe and Theo." She thinks she shouldn't have told Tek this but she couldn't keep it to herself any more, "The blackmail, the IVF switch and the file all involve Brady's." Tek says he will check it out. Lexie bawls. Tek hugs.

Sami assures Will nothing will go wrong. Will says he always hoped Sami and Lucas would get together, but he is really happy for her. In other words he's not going to live the rest of his life bawling about his parents getting together like Sami. Lucas thought Sami and EJ would turn out to be more than friends. He thinks Austin is lucky to wind up with a catch like Sami.

"Who also happens to be a great mom," says Will.

"Thank you," says Sami, "and I promise I will never disappoint you again." Translation: Prepare yourself, Will.

Carrie knocks at Austin's door. Austin drools, "Again, you look beautiful."

Carrie tells him it's time to walk the last mile, "All the best, Austin."

"Wait," says Austin, "Don't go."

Jennifer says she isn't worried about leaving Jack alone. She tells Frankie she was thinking about their wedding in this church, "The future was very clear to me back then, but Jack and Steve came back and nothing seems clear now."

Kayla wonders why Hope didn't call her about Shawn, "You should have taken advantage of the fact I am a doctor."

"We had Lexie there," says Hope.

"Like I said," says Kayla, "You needed a doctor."

Hope says all she cared about was if Shawn was OK.

Bo and Patch walk up looking pretty pleased with themselves. Kayla asks, "What's up with the two of you? You look like two cats that swallowed the canaries."

Bo spits the canary feathers out and says, "Nothin'... uh...we're just glad we're all here together."

Chelsea walks in and sees Max and Stephanie talking. Before she can do anything about it, Caroline tells her to go be a bridesmaid.

Kate announces to EJ that they will be sitting together. She goes off with John to ask him a question.

Roman heads to the back of the sanctuary.

Billie tells Phillip he looks good for a guy who almost drank himself into oblivion. She feels kind of left out with all her siblings getting married.

Austin tells Carrie, "Six months ago neither of us thought this is how things would turn out."

Carrie is pensive, "Let's see... six months ago... that was about a week in Salem time, wasn't it? That's what life's all about. Accepting the changes life throws at you. I hope your life with Sami will be everything you hope for." Carrie goes to help Sami.

PrevuzeSami stands all decked out in her dress as Carrie and Marlena walk in and gasp. Sami wonders if something is wrong, but Marlena assures her everything is OK, "It's time."

Sami asks for a minute alone. They all leave and Sami stares in the mirror. As she starts to leave the phone rings. She hesitates but picks it up, "Eric is that you?"

"No," says the mechanical voice, "Listen carefully. If this wedding happens your secret will be revealed – The way you blackmailed Lexie. Marry Austin and it will all come out. It would be a pity to disappoint your son again." Tears.

Austin shadow boxes. Lucas and Will walk in. Austin can't figure out why he's so nervous. Lucas insists nothing will stop the wedding.

Kate picks up a megaphone and asks John, "How did your date go?"

Marlena stands behind John and asks, "You had a date?"

"I can explain," says John.

"Not right now," says Marlena, "They're about to start the ceremony."

Kate smirks and walks off.

The ceremony begins. The fool's parade comes down the aisle: Belle and Phillip. Will and the brat. Lucas and Carrie. Austin stares at Carrie.

Prevuze: Hey! Whoever called this a McWedding in the first place? If McDonalds served food at this pace, it would have been out of business years ago.

Readers: Uh, Prevuze, YOU called it a McWedding in the first place.

Prevuze: Never mind.

Sami comes up to Roman in a trance. "It's showtime," says Roman, "You look beautiful."

Sami is a zombie, "What?"

Roman asks, "Is something wrong?"

"No," says Sami, "What could possibly be wrong?"

"Sami, look at me," says Roman, "Do you want to marry Austin or not?" Sami stands there nearly in tears. FF.



Lexie says, "When Shawn was here, Claire's medical file was found in his room." Candy-striper Bonnie asks, "What?"

Tek is on the phone, "Keep your eyes on all the entrances, windows too. We don't know who we're dealing with or what his MO is."

John looks toward the back of the sanctuary and grunts. Marlena asks, "What?" John shrugs it off, "Nothing."

Sami stands at the altar. Her voice cracks as she says, "Austin I – I don't think I can do this."

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Your Fiancée Has Flown The Coop

The clueless quad holds vigil at Shawn's bed. Lexie suggests a DNA test. Phillip thinks it's unnecessary, "There is no possible way Shawn could be Claire's father, right Belle? " Belle stares. Phillip stares.

Carrie and Marlena admire Sami's dress. "Sami's dress is gorgeous," says Carrie, "It must be the most beautiful one so far. I mean yet. Sorry. I didn't mean to sound so pessimistic."

"Either way you look at it," says Marlena, "It's a huge collection."

Carrie tells Marlena Sami called on EJ's phone. She insists Sami is in good hands. Deana the hairdresser is ready to leave since she has another client waiting. They talk her out of it and she heads for her car to get her hot rollers. Marlena hopes Sami and EJ aren't off being a couple of hot rollers themselves.

Lucas comes in to see Austin. He says everything is on schedule and Will is taking his groomsman responsibilities very seriously. Will is into Blue October and has selected the reception music. Lucas asks if Austin is having second thoughts. If he wants to back out, it's not too late. Austin insists Sami is the woman for him. He decides now would be a good time to go tell her that. Lucas tells him he can't go see her. Austin goes anyway.

EJ and Sami walk into the police station in cuffs. Sami insists they didn't do anything wrong. Officer Peters says they were trespassing. EJ claims they were just getting out of the rain. The door was unlocked. He tells Peters it's Sami's McWedding day. Peters doesn't buy it, "Tell it to the judge."

Belle tells Lexie Claire has to be Phillip's daughter. Lexie backs off on doing the DNA tests, but says she will investigate the origin of the paperwork. Phillip is going to investigate too, by golly. Everyone leaves Shawn's room. Lexie stops and ponders.

Outside, Phillip is upset. He wants to strangle whoever is doing this, "Are we supposed to believe this with no questions asked? That's not going to happen."

"Thank God," sighs Mimi.

"Why do you say it like that," says Belle, "Is there something you aren't telling us?"

Austin knocks on the bridal chamber door. He says he wants to talk to Sami. Inside, Carrie panics, "Austin can't know Sami isn't here." Austin keeps it up. Nothing. Carrie comes out. She tells Austin he should leave, "Sami's busy. You know, she has this wedding and everything."

Austin drools, "I know Sami didn't want to be upstaged, but you look amazing." Lucas agrees.

Carrie claims Sami didn't hear Austin, "They're blow drying her hair and she's listening to her MP3 player."

Inspector Lucas wonders when Sami got an MP3. Carrie says, "She borrowed mine. You know, the one I bought so I would have something to drown out the sound of your incessant voice"

Austin asks Carrie to have Sami to come to the door, "I won't look at her. I'll talk through the door. Is there a problem?"

Sami tells Peters he will be in trouble when her father finds out what he has done, "Do you know who he is?"

"I don't care if he is George Dubya," says Peters.

"Would you care if he is Roman Brady," asks EJ.

"Which one," asks Peters.

"I've been trying to tell you that," says Sami, "So will you kindly take these handcuffs off of me so that I can go get married?"

Mimi says she just meant she's glad none of them fell for the phony DNA test. Phillip is going to find the person who did this and make them pay.

The brat wonders what is going on with Austin and Carrie. Billie snaps at her, "Stay out of it."

Carrie stumbles around for words. She doesn't want to go get Sami. Austin asks Carrie to tell Sami how excited he is to marry her. Carrie claims Sami is putting on the finishing touches and doesn't want to be disturbed.

Lucas' mouth runs out of control, "With the MP3 player blasting in her ears?"

Carrie sighs, "I have to tell you something about Sami."

No need. The brat comes out of the bridal chamber and announces, "Your fiancée has flown the coop."

Peters asks, "Roman Brady... How did you come up with that little get out of jail free card?" He doesn’t believe Roman is her dad. Unfortunately Roman is off today. He also isn't at work. Sami insists that's because he wanted to be at her wedding.

Peters says, "If the commander's daughter was getting married, wouldn't I know about that? It's a once in a lifetime event."

Sami whispers, "For some people."

Peters yells, "Book 'em, Danno! "

Sami wonders if they get a phone call. "The phone call comes after booking," says Peters.

"Maybe by then I'll have missed the entire wedding," says Sami.

"Lucky groom," says Peters.

Lexie announces, "Shawn is free to go." Phillip reminds Belle they have to go to the wedding. Mimi sends her regrets. Phillip and Belle leave. Lexie tells Mimi Shawn is very lucky. Mimi goes in and tells Shawn he's in the clear. Hugs.

Evil Eve arranges files. John walks up to her and tells her he can't wait to pick up where they left off. He suggests someplace quiet and romantic where they can get to know each other.

Peters walks up behind them, "Eve, That perp I brought in was telling the truth. Her fingerprints show her name really is Samantha Brady, as in Commander Brady."

John contorts his face and asks, "What the hell? You just arrested Samantha Brady?"


Chelsea breaks the news about the missing bride. Carrie is upset with her. Carrie tries to smooth things over, "She's just running a little late. She and EJ..."

Austin raises his eyebrows, "She's wit EJ?"

Carrie explains. The brat is helpful, "Now that she's with that really hot racecar driver they either took the long way or took a detour to wherever runaway brides go."

Kate comes in and overhears the conversation, "Thank God! My prayers have been answered."

Sami paces in her dungeon. The bitch-ho'z gather 'round and ask if this is her first time in jail. "No," says Sami, "I even made it to death row once. That was a mistake just like this is." She tells them Peters brought in.

The bitch-ho'z put two and two together, "Peters runs the vice squad."

"Yeah," says Sami, "I was with a guy, minding my own business and Peters arrested us."

"A girl has to earn a living," says bitch-ho #1.

Sami says, "I didn't mean it like that. I'm not like you... ladies."

Bitch-ho #2 steps up, "What? Do you think you're better than us?"

"No," says Sami, "It's just that I'm not in the... entertainment world. I was on my way to church. I'm getting married today."

"And then you woke up," says bitch-ho #1.

"Where is this house," says bitch-ho #2, "

"In other words," says bitch-ho #1, "Where is your territory?"

"No," says Sami, "It's not like that. My dad is a Salem policeman."

"And my sugar daddy is the DA," says bitch-ho #1. The bitch-ho'z high-five.

Sami grabs the bars and says, "OMG! Tell me what I did to deserve this."

Mimi tells Shawn she will make sure he follows doctor's orders. Shawn says, "Well at least there is one good thing coming from all this... We don't have to go to Sami's wedding."

The bitch-ho'z counsel Sami, "There are worse things than getting busted."

John and Eve arrive at Sami's cell. John is tickled, "Well, Samantha, what kind of mess have you gotten into this time?"

Sami yells, "You have to get me to the church!"

John snickers and says, "I don't know..." Sami smacks him through the bars.

They open the cell door and let Sami out. As they leave bitch-ho #1 says, "Sami girl, why didn't you tell us your john was so cute?"

Kate is beside herself with joy, "Austin... I know this hurts..." Carrie butts in and claims Sami didn't run off with EJ. Austin thinks there must be a good reason why they haven't shown up. Kate reminds Austin of Sami's track record, "And somehow EJ always gets what he wants." Austin insists Sami and EJ are just friends.

Kate rubs it in, "Austin, everyone has seen a spark between them. I wouldn't put it past them to run off together."

The brat chimes in, "What other explanation would there be?"

"They could have had a flat tire," says Carrie.

"He's a racecar driver," says the brat.

Carrie insists they aren't calling off the wedding, "Isn't that right Austin?"

"Right," drones Austin, "No one's calling off the wedding. I'm sure she will be here."

"You haven't learned anything from the past," says Kate.

"She will be here," insists Austin, "I will be in the groom's room and will see you all in church!"

Everyone leaves. Kate says, "And if come reception time Austin is still single, it will be time to break out the champagne."

Peters still has to process Sami. Sami threatens. "I wish you would understand," says Peters.

"Just like you understood it's my wedding day," yells Sami, "All you had to do was give me a ride to the church. Austin's probably called off the ceremony by now. And Kate, the Wicked Witch of the West, is probably jumping for joy."

"I'm sorry," says Peters, "I really am."

"To little to late," snaps Sami, "I'll walk down that aisle with my dad and will tell him you are the reason I am late!"

John walks in and announces Sami is free to go. "Great," says Sami, "But we still don't have a ride to the church."

John thinks this is more fun than a trip to Bag-O-Pills Mart. "Sure you do," he says, "Number 9 bus, right outside the station... grab a transfer downtown... straight shot to St. Luke's."

Sami practically cries, "You're really enjoying this, aren't you John?"

"Well," says John, "You've gotta admit, it's pretty comical, what with your history of wedding day disasters and all." Chuckle-chuckle... "Uh... No... you're not. Of course I will drive you to the church. Now, aren't you glad you invited me?"


"Come on, suck up," says John, "I’m the one who sprung you, aren't I?"

"OK! OK! Thank you! Let's go!"

Sami runs out. John follows. On the way out, he tells Eve, "Pick you up around 7."

"I'll be waiting," says Eve.

Shawn and Mimi arrive at the loft. Shawn apologizes for scaring her. Mimi says they will just learn from their mistakes and move on. Shawn tells her he's so lucky to have her in his life.

Maggie comes out with Claire, "We thought we heard voices out here." She lectures Shawn for frightening them and then gives the drinking PSA. Shawn promises it won't happen again. He appreciates her concern. Maggie explains why she is babysitting instead of the neighbor, "They didn't want to pay extra for another actor to appear on screen." Shawn feels like he's been given a second chance.

Marlena gets off the phone with Roman, "He will have his friends at the station keep an eye out for Sami." Marlena and Carrie worry about Sami, but figure no news is good news. They speculate on what might have happened to her and decide the wedding will happen eventually.

Marlena asks how Carrie is doing. Carrie asks, "Do you mean – do I wish I was the bride today? I can't hide anything from you. I just hope everything works out the way it's supposed to. This is what Sami has wanted her whole life. Lucas is a great guy. I'm incredibly lucky."

"Sounds like you're trying to convince yourself," says Marlena, "I'm so sorry about your pregnancy.

"I just feel like I've let so many people down," says Carrie, "I don't want to add Sami to that list. I am truly happy for her."

Marlena tells her sometimes it's hard to forget an old love, "So I guess a part of me wonders if you are hoping this wedding doesn't happen. The other part of me isn't thinking right now or it would be wondering the same thing."

Maggie tells Shawn to follow Mimi's instructions. Maggie and Claire say goodbye.

Billie doesn't know what to think. She asks if the brat called Shawn. The brat tells her she did, and Shawn has been released.

"Good," says Billie, "At least something good happened today."

"Let's hope so," says the brat.

Billie wonders what that is all about, "You said something earlier about a good deed. What did you do?"

Phillip and Belle walk in. "OMG," says the brat, "You two are still together?

Belle asks, "What are you talking about Chelsea? Why wouldn't we be?"

Austin worries. Lucas insists Sami will be there. Kate butts in and apologizes for sounding unsupportive. She just wants him to be happy. Austin says, "If you want me to be happy, wipe that smile off your face."

Kate says, "I just thought today was going to be the worst day of my life, and now it's going to be the opposite."

PrevuzeMarlena and Carrie talk. Marlena remembers Sami used to borrow Carrie's dolls and break them. Carrie never wanted them after that. Oh, the metaphor! Marlena wonders if Carrie is doing this out of a sense of guilt. Before Carrie can answer, John and Sami walk in. Sami says, "I will tell you the whole story later, because I am going to marry Austin today!" FF on Austin and Sami with a big smile on Sami's face.


Lexie says, "There are a lot of other things going on here, too." Tek asks, "What do you mean?" Lexie says, "I mean that we all could be in for a whole lot of trouble."

Kayla asks, "What's up with the two of you. You look like two cats that swallowed the canaries." Bo and Patch stand there with canary feathers in their mouths. Bo says, "Nothin'... uh..."

Carrie says, "I can see it in your eyes, Belle. You wish that Claire was Shawn's baby, don't you?" The brat listens in.

Roman asks Sami, "Do you want to marry Austin or not?" Sami stands there in tears.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Immaculate Conception

Carrie answers a knock thinking it's Sami but it turns out to be Billie and the brat. The hens cluck wondering why Sami is not there.

Billie says, "She knows something bad will happen at the altar and she's just trying to spare herself."

"There is nothing that could keep her from this church except an act of God," says Carrie

The brat asks, "Well what kind of act of God do you think will stop her this time?"

Screaming Sami and EJ sprint for a door to get away from the latest act of God in the form of a downpour. They enter a nice house with all the furniture draped. Sami is completely unhinged. EJ says he will say it's his fault and swear his car broke down. Sami had checked the weather and found out there was only a 1% chance of thunderstorms today. EJ decides they can't go anywhere until the rain stops. Sami bawls, "Why did it have to rain today of all days?"

"Rain on your wedding day is good luck," says the ever-helpful EJ.

"Not if it stops the wedding," cries Sami. She runs to the door and curses Mother Nature. Mother nature responds by revving up the monsoon.

Belle reads the interesting little file. Shawn wants to know what it says. Belle says, "It says that Claire isn't Phillip's daughter. She's yours."

That got Shawn's interest. He looks at the file and declares it impossible. He wonders what the file is doing there anyway, "What kind of sick joke is this? At least we know one thing; I'm definitely not Claire's father. We would have had to... We talked about it and we dreamt about it, but this is impossible."

"Right," says Belle, "Except... maybe when we were stranded in the barn."

"I don't remember much about that night," says Shawn.

Belle speculates, "Maybe somehow we did..."

Shawn huffs, "I would think that's the sort of thing you would remember."

"All I know is I was completely out of it," says Belle.

"Right," says Shawn, "Like I said, nothing out of the ordinary happened that night."

Mimi comes into the room with Phillip following her. Shawn apologizes for scaring her. Mimi senses something is going on and asks Shawn what it is. "There is something wrong," says Shawn, "Very wrong."

"Do you want to explain that in English," asks Phillip.

"I guess it won't hurt since Max has all his racecars locked up." Shawn hands him the file, "This."

"What are you doing with Claire's file," asks Phillip.

"I dunno," says Shawn, "I sure want to find out."

The brat hates the dress Sami has selected for her to wear. Carrie keeps trying to call Sami, but always gets her voice mail. She wishes she had EJ's number.

"Maybe they got lost," says the brat.

"On the way to St. Luke's," asks Billie.

"Lost accidentally on purpose," says the brat, "EJ is hot, Mom."

Sami asks for the phone. She gets a signal and calls Carrie. Carrie answers. Sami starts to tell her about being trapped in the storm but the signal dies. She throws the phone at EJ.

EJ ducks and asks, "Who are you, Russell Crowe?"

Sami says she isn't going to be happy until she is standing at the altar. EJ reminds her she is forgetting about her burns. Apparently they disappeared as miraculously as Chloe's. "That's good news," says EJ, "And I have more good news." He uncovers a ham radio. EJ thinks he can figure out how to use it. If he can, he believes they can contact the Salem PD. Sami squeals and hugs him.

EJ works on the radio. Weeeeeouiiieeeeuuuu. Big band music comes on. Sami is worried everyone will think this is just another Sami McWedding fiasco.

Back at the henhouse, Billie says if something serious had happened they would have heard form the police by now, "Don't get me wrong but maybe Sami not being here was the way things were meant to be. It's Sami's dream wedding but not Austin's. Maybe fate is finally giving my brother a break."

Phillip looks at the file, "This is ridiculous. I don't know where this came form but Claire is my little girl."

Shawn says the file shows his DNA matches Claire's. Mimi is beginning to see a way out of her predicament, "Rreeaallllyy," she says, "Do you think it's true?"

Billie says, "We both know Austin still loves you."

Carrie says, "I am married to Lucas in case you forgot, like I did on the rooftop."

"He married a dream," says Billie, "He has an idealized vision of you, so it's obviously a dream. You're not happy. Austin isn't happy, and neither are Sami and Lucas. What the hell are you guys doing? I know Austin would rather be marrying you today. He doesn't know why you broke up with him! This is eating you up inside. You need to talk to somebody. Talk to me."

"I did some very stupid and selfish things," says Carrie.

"Let's not talk about your entire life," says Billie.

Carrie says, "I hurt a lot of people. I never want to do what I did again, unless, of course, I can catch a few moments alone with Austin up on the roof sometime."

Billie asks, "If Austin loves you, do you think he should marry Sami? He's a stand-up guy and he made the commitment, but he doesn't really love her."

"It's too late to be having this conversation," says Carrie, "I wrecked my chances for Austin and I to be together all the Days Of Our Lives."

Billie says, "Even with Sami on her best behavior, and we know that never happens, I give this marriage a year max. You and Austin belong together and Sami and Lucas belong together. Don't play the martyr. Listen to your heart. Do the right thing before it's too late."

Sami wishes she at least had a towel to dry off. EJ can't get anything on the ham radio except old music. Sami opens an old trunk. She finds, "beautiful old stuff." Sami pulls out a navy uniform.

"It's a WWII commander's outfit. EJ tries it on and, of course, it fits like a glove, "Do I look like a war hero from bygone days?" Sami stares at her hero.

Shawn claims he and Belle never had sex.

Belle isn't so sure. She brings up the burning barn incident. Phillip ain't happy. Shawn claims they would have remembered something like that. Mimi flashes back to her conversation with Bonnie.

Shawn is sure it never happened. Belle wants to know why the transplant worked. Phillip reminds them Zack is related to him, too. Mimi wants to know who left the file. Phillip accuses Belle of wanting it to be true. Belle starts to respond, but Phillip stifles her, "I'm telling you right now, someone has it in for us. I believe it's the same person who switched the embryos. I'm gonna make it my job from now on to find out who's behind all this."

The brat looks in the mirror. Aside from the fact she has no reflection, she thinks the dress looks pretty good on her. Think again. It looked better on the hangar."

Carrie insists she and Austin are finished, "I guess Belle and Phillip will be here soon."

The brat says, "Oh, I wouldn't count on that."

Big band music plays as captain EJ asks Sami to say something. Sami drools, "You don't need me to tell you how good you look in that." She finds a wedding dress inside. She thinks the trunk is telling them a story. "I like swing music," says Sami.

"It's lovely if you're into romance," says EJ.

Sami pictures the bride walking down the aisle; then, their first dance. That great 1940's icon Harry Connick, Jr. sings "Just Thinking of You' in the background. Sami and EJ dance, stare and smile.

Billie and Carrie are curious. They want to know why Belle and Phillip wouldn't come to the wedding. The brat says Belle and Phillip didn't look like they were on the way to a wedding when she saw them at the hospital, "I'm going to go check on Shawn even though he hates me." She leaves.

"That girl," says Billie, "The wheels are constantly spinning. I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"Prada, no doubt," says Carrie.

Lexie examines the file. She says she will check it out. Phillip insists there is nothing in there that can be true. He thinks whomever did this is the same person who switched the embryos. Belle says it sounds like he's concocting a conspiracy theory.

Phillip says, "A conspiracy theory makes more sense than immaculate conception, doesn't it? Someone has a grudge against us. If the three of you want to sit there and do nothing about it, that's fine. But I'm not gonna stand for it."

Belle thinks this is unreal. Shawn says the Brady's have had enemies for years. Ditto the Kiriakis'. Dr. Tramp is stunned by all this. She says she shouldn't be, because her father is Stephano. She goes to alert security and check out the information in the file. Outside, she reads the file again.

The brat phones the hospital, "This is Chelsea Brady. Can you tell me how my dear brother Shawn is doing?"

Lexie stomps into the hall. The nurse tells her about the call from the brat. Lexie takes the phone and the brat asks how Shawn is doing. Laconic Lexie says, "Fine."

The diplomatic little imp says, "Are you telling me the truth? You hesitated."

"A situation has come up," says Lexie, "It's not health related. Don't concern yourself. Talk to Shawn and ask him to explain."

More dancing. A kid's voice on the ham radio crackles, "Come in! Come in!"

EJ and Sami rush to the radio, "EJ here – downtown Salem."

"I'm Joel," says the kid, "I live in Saginaw."

"Listen, Joel," says EJ, "We need a bit of a favor. We're stranded in a storm. We're at Maple and 6th. Please call the Salem police department and have them send a squad car. It's important, Joel."

Joel says he will try. The signal fades. EJ assures Sami Joel will call the police. Sami thinks he's just a little boy and won't be able to help. "Everybody was right I'm never gonna get to marry Austin am I," she whines.

Billie and Carrie wait for Sami to show up. Billie thinks Carrie doesn't know what to root for – a wedding or a no show.

Carrie asks, "Are you saying I should follow your example – you and Bo?"

"This situation is different," says Billie, "Austin loves you. Bo loves Hope." Her voice cracks, "Sometimes it's hard to figure out what the right thing is." Billie goes to find Chelsea.

Carrie makes a phone call, "Marlena, it's about Sami. I sure hope you can help me."

Phillip asks if the nurse saw unauthorized people going into Shawn's room. She has only seen family members, but will ask if anyone else saw something.

Mimi says she is a Lockhart – not a rich mogul. She doesn't have the same worries about having enemies, even if Phillip and Shawn do have those fears, "Whoever is out to get us failed. The plan backfired. All I care about is that you are OK. So I think we should forget about the file. Let's move on."

"I wish it was that easy," says Belle.

Sami paces and looks at her watch.

EJ suggests a game. Sami's not in the mood. She wants to get married. She throws a fit and says it's the worst day of her life. Except maybe for that death row thing. EJ tells her one day she will laugh at this.

"What," says Sami, "When I'm a bitter lonely old maid?"

EJ suggests, "Try to relax."

"I don't wanna relax," yells Sami, "I would have my hair done by now and my makeup would be perfect. I had the most beautiful veil – you should see it, but now no one will." She asks for a handkerchief. EJ can't come through. She goes through her purse looking for one. She finds a note from The Hand, "Whoever has been writing the notes wasted their time because I ruined my own wedding. It's all I have ever dreamed of. No one can say I didn't try. All I have ever wanted was to marry Austin since I was 15 years old. And now I will never be Mrs. Austin Reed." BAWL.

There is a knock at the door. Sami charges over and opens it.

Carrie continues her conversation with Marlena. She tells her she was hoping maybe Sami had contacted her.

Sami hugs the officer and squeals with delight. Officer Peters introduces himself. Sami is so excited, "You don't know how glad I am to see you!"

"I don't know why," says Officer Peters, "You are under arrest for trespassing."

Billie wonders why the brat is so happy. She thinks she is up to something. The brat swears there is nothing to worry about. She claims she did a good deed. Billie can't believe it. "It's going to make all the difference in the world," says the little snot.

Belle comes up to Mimi to talk but Mimi ignores her. They both go back to Shawn's bed. Shawn asks Belle, "What are you thinking?"

Belle says, "I don't think I can just move on like Mimi says until we know who is behind this."

Lexie comes back. She says she spoke to the lab and the techs say the information in the file is legit. Phillip won't give up. He asks if Lexie talked to the actual lab tech who did the tests. Lexie says, "The actual lab tech is off today."

How ccoonnvveenniieenntt. Phillip jumps on that. Lexie says there is something they can do to clear this up. She will run the tests again. FF Belle.



Officer Peters says, "That perp I brought in was telling the truth." John contorts his face and asks, "What the hell? You just arrested Samantha Brady?"

Sami yanks at her cuffs and says, "Will you kindly take these handcuffs off of me so that I can go get married?"

Phillip and Belle walk in. "OMG," says the brat, "You two are still together? Belle asks, "What are you talking about Chelsea? Why wouldn't we be?"

Marlena says to Carrie, "So I guess a part of me wonders if you are hoping this wedding doesn't happen."

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