Monday, July 31, 2006

Someone Erased My Hard Drive

Lexie tells Jennifer Jack has taken a turn for the worse.

Patch goes back into the sleazy bar. Della wants to know what's up. He says he couldn't find her.

Della sneers, "You and Blondie..."

Patch shouts, "Her name is Kayla!"

"OK," says Della, "You and Kayla come from different worlds. She's probably never been around a barfly before."

"Yeah," says Patch, "I'm a barfly just like you."

Della says, "You figure Miss Priss will want to spend the rest of her life cleaning your dirty clothes like I do? She'll drive you crazy. She won't give in until she gets her way. I guess she didn't fight too hard for the love of her life. If she knew you like I do she wouldn't have walked out of here."

"I don't know what I want," says Patch, "I don't remember anything. But I do know she turned me into a husband and father."

"And as soon as she left you went back to being you," says Della, "She doesn't know you. I do. She may have been your legal wife. But I probably spent more years with you than she did. Forget about her. It wouldn't have worked anyway."

Kayla has transported herself back to Salem. She is with Stephanie in the pub. She tells her about her whirlwind trip to Cincinnati. Stephanie is distant. Kayla wonders if something is wrong with her. Stephanie tells her she saw "the guy" tonight. She has realized they can never be together.

Austin tells Lucas and Carrie he knows this is terrible for them – finding out Carrie isn't pregnant. Sami overhears, "What do you mean? Carrie has to be pregnant!"

Lexie tells Jennifer Jack regained consciousness, but wanted Jennifer to have some time alone with Frankie, "But he has spiked a high fever. He's not responding to any medication." Lexie assures her they will keep trying to save him, "The fever is an indication he has reached the final stage of his illness." Jennifer insists it isn't over and runs in to see Jack.

Jack tells her he thought he was going to get another chance to do things right. Jennifer tosses reality aside and insists he does everything right. Jack tells her she has made him the happiest man alive. He got another chance to see her. That's more than he could have ever expected.

"No, Jack," says Jennifer, "You have a right to expect a full life. It's not over yet. Do you hear me?"

Jack struggles, "Jennifer... it's time. I can feel it. I think you can feel it too. I have tried. I really have. I think it's time for you to let me go."

Sami tells Carrie she is sorry for saying that and sorry she lost the baby. She asks when Carrie had the miscarriage. Carrie tells her about the hysterical pregnancy. Sami says to look on the bright side. After the honeymoon, she will probably come home pregnant. Sad looks all around. "What aren't you telling me," asks Sami.

Patch plays pool. Della brings him a beer and kisses him. Patch tells her he missed her when he was gone. "So," says Della, "Now you are back home where you belong."

"Am I," he wonders.

"What are you talking about," says Della, "Are you starting to remember the life you had? You have your woman and your friends here. What more could a man want?"

"A different woman and different friends," says Patch.

Kayla wants to know why Stephanie thinks it is over with this guy. She wants to help. Stephanie lashes back at her – they usually don't do mother-daughter heart-to-heart talks. She thinks Kayla hasn't noticed she has grown up. She doesn't open up because she learned it from Kayla. She wonders why Kayla didn't come to visit Salem and show her where she was born and where her dad lived.

Kayla says, "I was a wreck when your dad died. I didn't want to bring you to Salem and frighten you. And Salem is a very frightening town. I wanted you to have the sense you wouldn't lose me, too. I was trying to protect you, but you're right. You're not a little girl any more and you deserve to know the truth. You asked how my day was. Awful. Your dad stayed because he's not coming back. He told me to just forget him."

Jennifer says she will not let Jack go. She wants him to keep fighting. He says he can't. This is why he tried to stay away – to spare her the pain of having to go through this. He tells her he is glad PatchNickSteve convinced him to come home. This time with her has meant a lot to him. She begs him to stop.

Abby comes in as Jack rambles on. She begs him to stop too.

Austin tells Sami if Lucas and Carrie wanted to "share" they would. Sami goes to get drinks. EJ thinks he should leave. Carrie tells him he doesn't have to. She says Lexie told her she can't have children. Never. "OMG," whispers the ever-compassionate Sami, "This can't be happening to me!"

Patch twirls his longneck. Della asks what's on his mind. Patch says when he first turned up in Cincinnati he was desperate to find out who he was. She tells him to stop thinking about it, "It's ancient history."

Patch talks about his family in Salem. A mother, a dying brother, a daughter who is pretty and smart and races. He missed her whole life.

"Well," says Della, "We know one thing. She must've learned to drive from you. Her mother probably never even went over the speed limit. I'll bet that rich bitch..."

Patch explodes, "Hey! Don't go there."

Della detours, "You probably left because you were scared. You thought she would reject you so you rejected her instead. She's gotten to you. That's why you went after her. You want her."

Stephanie wants to know how this could happen. Kayla and Patch seemed so happy. Kayla agrees but everything changed when he got back there, "I never stopped loving him all these years. It's like I froze him in time, but he has had a whole other life without me. I don't know how you let go of someone you desperately love."

"You've got me, Mom," says Stephanie, "You'll have me for all the Days Of Our Lives. All the years I dreamed of us talking like this... I'm sorry it had to be because of this." Kayla changes the subject. She asks about the guy Stephanie is interested in.

Jack tells Abby things are out of their hands. Apparently the new medicine didn't work for him. Abby bawls, "Dad you've been dead so many times, you can do it again. I know you can."

Jack says, "Nobody can beat death or bad writing. But I tried. I hung on as long as I could."

Jennifer says he has fought harder than anyone could imagine. Jack tells them if they are going to mourn, don't make a career out of it. He wants them to live their lives and move on and remember the good stuff. He will be looking after them, "Give JJ a hug and kiss for me."

Maggie shows up at the door with JJ. She says, "Why don't you kiss him yourself?"

Jack tells JJ he won't understand any of this, but there are a couple things he wants to tell him. JJ eats his cheerios.

Sami feels terrible for Carrie. EJ suggests they go get some wine. As they leave, EJ asks when Sami is going to tell Austin the truth.


EJ says she should do it. Sami says he can't tell him now. Carrie made her decision to marry Lucas based on a child she will never have. She has to find some other way to stop the creep who is writing the notes.

Lucas asks Sami for a heating pad. He twisted his knee chasing down what looked like a disembodied hand scurrying down the hallway.


Sami asks him what that's all about. Austin holds up the note, "He probably was here to drop this off."

Patch insists he doesn't want Kayla. He just went out to see if she was OK. He tells Della he used to be a cop. Della laughs. Then he tells her he was an undercover government agent.

"Oh," chuckles Della, "My own Ethan Hunt."

He tells her he thinks one of them staged his death.

"Why wouldn't they just kill you," asks Della.

"That would have made too much sense," says Ethan Hunt, "But writing a sensible story line for this show is Mission Impossible. I do know I don't have amnesia. Someone erased my hard drive."

"Maybe it was the government."

"You've been watching too many conspiracy movies," says Patch, "What I want to know is what happens if they find out I know I'm Steve Johnson. I don't know who they are but if they still have it in for me I have to find out what really happened to me."

Stephanie says she saw "the guy" earlier tonight. They were having a great time until his girlfriend showed up, "What does she have that I don't have?"

Kayla thinks for a minute, "Anorexia? People see different things in different people."

"I have a successful career," says Stephanie, "And she doesn't even have a job. I am fairly good looking. Why would he choose her over me?"

"Does he know you even like him," asks Kayla.

"I haven't told him," says Stephanie, "I've been down this road too many times before. I'm afraid if I do tell him, I will totally lose him. I like him more than I've ever liked anyone. What is wrong with me?" Hugs.

Sami asks what the note is. Austin says it's addressed to her, "The person who left it is probably the one Lucas chased."

Looselips senses another opportunity to put his mouth in high gear. "It's addressed to you. It's way past time we opened it," says Lucas.

Kayla says, "Maybe he is the one with the problem, not you." Stephanie says he chooses to see the best in people. Kayla thinks maybe he is afraid to express his feelings, "When you really like somebody you have to tell him and risk the consequences."

Stephanie thinks this is all trivial given everything else that is going on, "What if I tell him and it turns out like the other times?"

Kayla asks, "Wouldn't it be better to tell the truth and know instead of live a fantasy?"

"Are you willing to do the same thing with Dad?"

Della tells Patch he has a new life, "Why drag up all this old stuff?"

Because he doesn't know what he's up against. He could be putting her in danger too, "If somebody can stage my death and erase my memory, that somebody's got a lot of power, so I have to assume they're coming after me again. They won't be too happy to find out what has been wasted. I have to assume they are coming after me again. I have to be ready." The Hand stalks. Oh, I get it... the right hand is in Salem and the left hand is in Cincinnati.

Jack's room is becoming all too crowded. He tells JJ adventure is a good thing. Jennifer thinks he is getting weaker. Maggie goes for Lexie.

Jack is delirious, "Hey Frankie... don't try to be one of those boring people who always have to be on time." He drifts. Jennifer begs him to stay with them.

"It's hard," slurs Jack, "We have a deadline... Jennifer? There you are... Frankie is..." Jack is silent. Jennifer begs him to keep talking. FF.

Lucas says, "Nobody in this room knows you better than I do, so why don't you tell me what is going on."

Mimi says, "If Shawn found out the truth he will leave me for Belle in a second." Patrick says, "You gotta tell him the truth – tonight."

Belle tells Shawn, "You felt a bond with Claire before the transplant. I think I know why you feel so close to her."

Austin says, "You care." Carrie says, "It sounds like you wanted me to." Kiss.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Blondie Pulls Out The Big Guns

Pan in to the brat's artwork on the locker. Max and Stephanie walk into the garage and find the brat's message scrawled there. Max wonders who would do this. Stephanie immediately accuses Chelsea. Max realizes it was her, apologizes and hugs Stephanie.

Outside, Abby lectures the brat and orders her to go back in and wipe it off before they see it. The little graffiti artist admits it was immature and stupid, "I don't know what came over me." She thanks Abby and they both go back inside to erase it. As they enter they see Max and Stephanie hugging. The brat explodes, "She's going to be so sorry she ever frickin' messed with me."

Sami thinks EJ sees her as a nice neighbor who flirts too much, but she says she is wicked. She has barely scratched the surface in telling him what she has done wrong.

"Dear God, Don't tell me everything then. We've been having this conversation forever," says EJ.

Sami says she doesn't want to be alone. EJ insists a woman like her will never be alone. Sami says, "I don't want to settle and I don't want to wind up with someone like me." Sami says she loves Austin and every man except him was just a substitute.

"What about Lucas," asks EJ.

Sami snaps back, "Would you stop asking questions? The bottom line is if I tell Austin the truth I will lose him forever."

EJ suggests Sami "practice" by telling him. Sami refuses.

Austin finds the note. Lucas walks down the hallway and discovers the nefarious Hand doing his dastardly deed. The Hand sees Lucas and scurries off. Lucas chases. The ruckus brings Austin and Carrie out into the hallway.

Kayla struggles with her keys and slams them on the top of the car. She opens her cell phone and punches in a number. Caroline answers. Kayla bawls into the phone. Nick doesn't want her. She can't believe she's losing him all over again.

Patch orders a cold one. Della comes up tamping her cigarettes and offers him a hot one. He turns her down. She says it's nice to have him back even though he is a grouch. She thought he was buying Blondie's act. "Hey," says Patch, "It wasn't an act. We are married. We have a daughter."

Della crawls all over him, "Maybe you were married to her once but you're with me now, Nick. Just the way we both like it."

EJ keeps working on Sami. She tells him to stop being charming. He asks her to confide in him. He just wants to help.

"Where do I start?"

"Let's pick somewhere random... the beginning!"

Sami takes him back to the time she and Austin were roommates, "I did everything I could to attract his attention except walk around the apartment naked." She takes him through the Highstyle fiasco. EJ speculates Sami didn't tell Austin when she found out Carrie was the president.

Lucas wants to open the note. Austin refuses. Lucas gives Carrie the aspirin and goes to get her some water. Carrie tells Austin they have to clam up. Austin says, "You love me. We both know that."

Abby lectures the brat, "Stephanie is beautiful, smart, mature. Come to think of it, she's everything you're not. If you lose Max, it will be your fault. I said this would happen if you played games. If you want him back you will have to say you are sorry."

The brat shouts, "I'm sorry for this... I'm sorry for that... I'm sorry for being alive. I'll bet Hope wishes it was me under the wheels of Bo's car instead of Zack. If I admit you're right will you stop lecturing me?"

"Yes," says Abby, "You can do it."

Max wipes the locker clean. He thinks this is all his fault. Stephanie says, "Don't apologize for Chelsea."

The brat walks in and says, "I owe you both an apology."


Caroline asks where Kayla is. Kayla tells her about the bar experience. Caroline thinks Patch has a strong connection to her and Stephanie. Kayla says, "I think you are wrong. I thought he was getting to know me again and might want for us to be together all the Days Of Our Lives, but he doesn't."

Patch pushes Della away and growls, "I'm not in a partying mood. Take it or leave it."

"I'll take it," says Della, "Anytime. You've got me crazy about you, and I can think of a lot of men who would like to be in your cowboy boots. Dammit, she got to you, didn't she?"

Sami rambles on. Carrie didn't want to be with Austin after the takeover, but Austin still wasn't interested in Sami. Austin and Lucas wanted to be with Carrie and no one wanted to be with Sami. So it was do or die. EJ assumes Sami needed Lexie's help to keep Austin and Carrie apart.

Carrie takes the aspirin. She thanks Lucas for caring for her. He says, "You are my wife. That's what I live for." Carrie talks about not being able to conceive. Austin is sorry. Lucas talks about adopting. He thinks this may be a blessing. They can spend their time getting to know each other. He goes to call the super to report a hand running around the hallways.

Austin assures Carrie things will be OK. Carrie cries, "Hurting someone as wonderful as Lucas... I can't do it."

Lucas comes in to find Carrie and Austin hugging, "AHEM!!."

The brat says, "I was stupid, dumb, immature."

Max says, "Keep going..."

"I picked an inappropriate way to get back at you."

Stephanie says, "You didn't write something about Max. You wrote that about me. So you think I'm trying to move in on your boyfriend?"


"Doesn't that feel better," asks Stephanie, "The truth. Max and I are just friends. That's all."

"I believe you," says the brat, "Do you forgive me?"

Max and Stephanie stare. Stephanie decides to give them some time alone.

The brat asks if Max forgives her. "Nope," he says.

Kayla tells Caroline Patch doesn't remember her. Caroline tells her to show him a way to remember her. Kayla swears she will not lose him again. Inside, Della tamps her cigarettes. She doesn't smoke, she just likes pounding the pack. Patch and Della talk. Patch says he never meant for any of this to happen. He went to Salem to help his dying brother. But Kayla was there and "things happened."

"So," sneers Della, "Blondie pulls out the big guns. And I'll bet she got cozy with you, too. O-K. So... do you remember?"

"I'm a complete blank," says Patch, "And I don't remember either."

"This might be a sign your life with her is over," says Della, "We got a good thing going. If you were supposed to be with her you'd remember. It's that simple." Della walks away. Patch checks her out as she sashays over to the jukebox. She drops in a quarter, punches some buttons, and turns to Patch, "They're playing our song, baby. Come on. You know you want to." She pulls him up to dance.

EJ tells Sami to keep talking. Sami tells him about Lexie and the genetic marker caper. EJ is silent. Sami explodes, "This is exactly why I hate telling the truth. Because now you hate me too, just like I knew you would." EJ looks up at her.

Lucas tells Carrie things will work out. Ask long as they have love they can get through anything. From now on their marriage will be smooth sailing. Carrie goes to wash her face. As she heads into the bathroom, she stops to stare at Austin.

Austin thinks he should go back up to the roof. Lucas wants to settle something first.

Stephanie finds Abby outside and tells her she didn't beat up on Chelsea. She wants to know why Abby and the brat are friends. Abby says underneath everything Chelsea is a good person.

Stephanie says, "Underneath everything she is a thin layer of skin hanging on a skeleton." Stephanie understands everything Chelsea has been through – losing the Bensons, finding out Billie and Bo are her real parents, the little incident with Zack, "But the two of us just found out our dads aren't dead and we aren't running around scribbling hate messages."


Abby says she told the brat making Max jealous is not the way to go.

Max accuses the brat of being a baby. He lectures her for acting like a slut at Dune. Max thinks Stephanie is cool, but he asked the brat to be his girlfriend. He tells her to cut it out. She needs to trust that he loves her. They kiss.

Kayla starts to go back into the bar, but sees Patch and Della dancing. Della is all over him, "If you had all the quarters we've spent on playing this song, I'd be dancing with a rich man. I have a thing for you, baby." Kiss. Kayla watches and frets.

Max and the brat come out. He tells Stephanie he's going to give the brat a ride home. They will work on his car later.

Stephanie asks, "So... She got to you, huh?"

"She just needed some hand holding..."

"And neck wringing."

The brat thanks Abby. She says Max forgave her, "And he said he loved me."

"Gee," says Abby, "I thought Phillip was the one who got his head banged." Max and the brat leave. Abby tells Stephanie, "Usually she digs herself in so deep she never gets out."

"Max is a good guy," says Stephanie, "I hope Chelsea doesn't hurt him too much. One day she will go too far. They will be history. It's predictable."

EJ says he doesn't hate Sami. She can't believe that. He thinks she is passionate. She will do anything for love. He says he is almost in awe of her. She wishes everyone could be as understanding as him. He thinks if Austin has any brains he will forgive Sami, so unfortunately, Sami has to live without being forgiven. EJ says he would forgive her. Sami thinks EJ is right. Austin can't go back to Carrie.

Carrie sighs and wonders how she can break Lucas' heart.

Lucas tells Austin it amazed and moved him when he saw Austin holding Carrie. He thinks it's great Austin being there for them. It's killing him seeing Carrie like this.

Sami and EJ come in as Austin says, "It's terrible for you finding out Carrie isn't pregnant with your child."

Patch pulls away from Della. She wants to know what he's doing. He says he isn't in the mood. Something has changed. He doesn't know what's going on.

Della turns vicious, "Damn you! You're thinking about that woman!"

Patch yells, "You aren't in my head! You don't know what I'm thinking about!"

Della pulls him in for a big kiss. Patch pushes away, "Back off, Della, I can't breathe." He storms out and sees Kayla arranging the next flight to Salem. He runs after her as she roars away. FF.



Austin says, "It's addressed to you." Lucas says, "It's way past time we opened it."

Patch tells Della, "If somebody can stage my death and erase my memory, that somebody's got a lot of power, so I have to assume they're coming after me again."

Jack tells Jennifer, "I've tried. I really have. I think it's time for you to let me go."

Thursday, July 27, 2006


The brat storms into the garage looking for Max. Abby follows. Abby does some quick detective work and concludes Max and Stephanie are together.

Stephanie and Max are at the Java Café. Stephanie tells Max not to let the brat get to her. She thinks the brat is crazy, "If I had a guy like you there is no way I would treat him like that."

Sami hopes Carrie is OK. She didn't mean to upset her. Austin goes to check on her. EJ chews on the fact Sami said this was the worst thing she has ever done. When he questions her about it, Sami says it's debatable. He urges her to tell Austin NOW. He grabs her and tells her to grow up and take responsibility for her actions.

Carrie bawls. Lucas tries to comfort her. Carrie screams, "STOP IT, LUCAS, NO! I CAN'T. I made a huge mistake. We rushed our wedding because I thought I was pregnant. I don't know how to say it... I only married you because I thought I was pregnant." Austin listens outside.

Kayla wants to get out of the joint. Patch insists he belongs there. It's the only life he can relate to. Nothing in Salem was even remotely familiar to him. He thinks its best to go their separate ways, "I don't want to hurt you more than I already have. It's time to say goodbye."

Lucas tries to comfort Carrie. She says she has just been getting more upset since they talked to Lexie. She needs time to think about everything. Lucas agrees. They will take things slow. Starting with the honeymoon. He assures her things will be fine. Carrie comes up with a bad headache. Lucas goes for aspirin. Carrie takes the opportunity to bawl. Austin walks in. Staredown.

Sami knows she has to tell Lucas, but she is afraid. EJ insists Austin will forgive her. Sami twirls her ring and remembers Austin's rejection at their last wedding. Or the one before that. Or the one... Whichever one it is, Austin says, "I'm not marrying Sami today or any day and I don't care if I hear the name Sami Brady ever again."

Sami says she can't let Austin hear this from someone else. EJ tells Sami, "Your future lies in your hands. You need to make a choice. Either you tell Austin and go through a few moments of hell or you let someone else do it and go through a lifetime of hell."

The brat worries that Stephanie is making a move on Max. Abby tells her the only time she's interested in Max is when someone else is after him. Abby thinks Max and Stephanie are just friends. The brat asks, "Do you think she's still a Virgin?"

"I heard my mom and Aunt Kayla talking," says Abby, "They said she wants to wait until marriage."

"This is very interesting," says the brat, "We need to find out more about her." The brat rummages through Stephanie's locker. Abby tries to stop her.

Max asks about the guy Stephanie is interested in. Stephanie says she thinks he might be interested in someone else. Max thinks Chelsea wasn't ready for an exclusive relationship. Stephanie says Chelsea reminds her of Sami. Max insists she is nothing like Sami.

Patch doesn't know who he is or who Kayla is either. Kayla insists they can start over with getting to know each other. Patch thinks someone did this to him purposely. Kayla wants to fight, but thinks that isn't what Patch wants. He says she is right.

Sami and EJ. Blah, blah, blah. Same stuff. Sami wonders if the person stalking her might not know what she has done. EJ wonders if Sami wants to take that gamble, "There could be another note on the way right now."

The Hand seals an envelope and lays it on a table.

Lucas comes out and finds Austin there. He couldn't find an aspirin, "Sami is used to giving headaches not getting them." Lucas decides to go to the store and get some. He asks Austin to look after Carrie while he is gone.

Lucas leaves. Austin tells Carrie he overheard what she said about the baby. "I can't do anything right," says Carrie, "I feel like such a failure." He puts an arm around her shoulder.

Max is relieved there is only one Sami Brady in this world. Stephanie says, "Give her time. Chelsea is Sami on training wheels." Max thinks the brat doesn't let herself get close to anyone because she's afraid she will lose him. She's insecure. Stephanie thinks she doesn't look insecure when she's throwing herself at every guy in sight. Max says he thinks Stephanie was right when she thought the brat was jealous of her.

Abby begs Chelsea not to do this. The brat insists she is just going to take a peek inside. She dives in and pulls out a book. Wuthering Heights. The sales slip is stuck in halfway as a marker. The brat pulls it out and sees Stephanie bought it about a month ago. "Slow reader," she says. Abby wonders why the brat doesn't try being nice to Max. Chelsea is defensive, "I am nice to him. Aren't I? You're my friend – you can tell me."

"You've flirted with other guys," says Abby, "It's what you're doing now."

The brat finds a notebook with Max' name and hearts on the page, "Now tell me she's not after my boyfriend!"

Patch thinks they need to be realistic. The only thing this trip has accomplished is to remind him where he belongs is in Cincinnati. Kayla says when she lost Patch, the only thing that kept her going was Stephanie. She tried to get involved with another man, but it didn't work, "If you walk out of my life tonight I will love you for all the Days Of Our Lives, and that's just the way it is."

"You deserve to have that kind of love in return," says Patch, "I'm sorry. I don't think it can come from me."

Sami, once again, wonders how she can tell Austin. EJ, once again, tells her she has to find the courage to do it. Sami flashes back to Lexie telling her she is now free to tell Carrie the truth and Austin's love won't last once he knows the truth.

Austin wonders why Carrie didn't say anything on the roof. She says she didn't want to ruin his special evening with Sami, "How could I have been so stupid?"

"It comes natural for you," says Austin.

"Lexie told me I can never have children," bawls Carrie.

"Wow," says Austin, "I know how badly you wanted a family."

"It's just one more dream that won't come true," says Carrie, "I just have to suck it up."

Austin asks, "You and Lucas are talking about adopting, right?"

"That's not what's bothering me," blubbers Carrie, "I need to figure out a way to clean up the mess I've made. You were right all along. I only got married because I thought I was pregnant. It's time I was honest with myself. This marriage was a huge mistake."

Stephanie thought they had decided there was no reason for the brat to be jealous of her. Max thinks she's sweet. She thinks he is sweet. He wonders if he should take that as a compliment. He thinks she's trying to psych out the competition. He asks about how she is doing. She says meeting Max has helped. She always dreamed of her parents getting back together. Now there is a real possibility of it happening. Max asks, "You really believe in fairy tales, don't you?"

"You must, too," says Stephanie, "or you would have given up on Chelsea long ago."

"No," says Max, "That's because I believe in nightmares. Let's get back and work on my long lamented car."

Abby says all this proves is Stephanie doodles. The brat doesn't buy it. She finds Stephanie's "cheap" lipstick and scribbles "WHORE!" on the locker.

Patch says Kayla has wasted too much of her life on him. It has to end. He is never going to be the person she remembers. Kayla doesn't care. He lectures her. She insists he is talking like her husband.

"You just don't give up do you," asks Patch, "You are asking me to give up my life, too. You are asking me to choose between what's comfortable and a blank slate. I need you to go."

Abby tells Chelsea to wipe it off. She refuses and drags Abby outside.

Max and Stephanie come in and discover the nice little message, "OMG," says Stephanie.

Max asks, "Who would do something like this?"

Stephanie says, "You have to ask?"

Max says, "Oh, Chelsea. Steph, I'm sorry... I'm sorry." He hugs her.

Abby encourages Chelsea to erase the message.

"It was stupid," says the brat, "I don't know why I did it. You have been a good friend to me. Let's go wipe it off." Too late. She sees Max and Stephanie hugging.

EJ and Sami take us down the same old path.

Austin reminds Carrie she was so sure she wanted to marry Lucas. She agreed to marry him before she was pregnant. She says she doesn't know if she would have done it if she knew she couldn't have children.


Austin asks, "Are you telling me you wish you married me instead of Lucas?"

"There is no point in getting into it," says Carrie, "I'm married to Lucas. You're engaged to Sami. Nothing will change that."

The hand slips a note under the door. Carrie sees it. Austin picks it up. Out in the hallway, Lucas sees the hand scurrying off, "Hey! What're you doing?"

"So I guess this is it," says Kayla.

"I guess so."

Patch wishes he could be the Steve Johnson Kayla remembers. Kayla begs him to come back to Salem. He wants her to understand. She has tried but never will. She gets up and leaves.

Outside, her car remote doesn't work. She struggles, but can't get the key in the lock. She throws her keys and sobs. FF.



Carrie cries, "Hurting someone as wonderful as Lucas... I can't do it." Lucas comes in to find Carrie and Austin hugging.

Stephanie says, "Don't apologize for Chelsea." The brat says, "I owe you both an apology."

Sami says, "This is exactly why I hate telling the truth. Because now you hate me too. Just like I knew you would." EJ looks up at her.

Kayla watches Patch and Della liplock.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

You Never Learn Until You Get Burned

Cincinnati, Ohio. Let's all head into the bar and have a Hudepohl. The hand stalks. A woman enters the seedy joint, walks up to Patch and plants a big one on him. Kayla pulls her off, "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm his wife! Who the hell are you?"

"I'm his wife," says Kayla. She turns to Patch, "How can you be married to another woman?" Tell me." Patch wishes he were in Tasmania right about now.

The brat dirty dances. Max drags her away and asks who those guys are. She says they are her friends. He wants to take her outside. She refuses.

Belle hopes Shawn doesn't hate her. He insists he doesn't. Belle says, "I just need to make up my mind 100%."

"There's not much room in there," says Shawn, "It shouldn't take long."

"There is no way to go back," says Belle, "I need to let it go once and for all." Hugs.

Phillip walks in and sees them hugging. He gets sarcastic, "Thanks for being here to take care of my wife. I can see how upset she is about almost losing me."

Carrie worries about having told everyone she was pregnant when she wasn't sure, "I feel like I must be crazy."

Lucas tries to comfort Carrie, "It could happen to anybody."

"I rushed our wedding," she whines.

"I'm just glad we got married," says Lucas.

"The pages in our baby book will always be blank," says Carrie, "I'm never going to be pregnant. If you don't want to stay together..."

He stops her, "I married you because I loved you, not to mention my fantasy about a dominatrix."

"I feel so ridiculous," says Carrie.

"I gotta ask you this," he says, "Now that you know you're not pregnant with our baby, what are you saying? Are you saying you regret marrying me?"

EJ compliments Austin on the dinner. Sami can't stop staring at her ring. EJ can't stop staring at Sami. Austin goes for more champagne. Sami scowls and twirls her ring. She takes it off.

Austin sees her take it off and tells her to put it back on. Sami says, "Austin, the truth is I don't deserve it."

Carrie says she doesn't regret getting married. She is sad, but it has nothing to do with Lucas. He tells her she could never disappoint him. She suggests going on the roof to celebrate with Austin and Sami.

Austin says he told Sami not to sweat the cost. Sami says it's not about that. She doesn't think she should wear his ring until she tells him the truth, "I can't tell you how much it means to have you in my life." Hugs. "Sometimes I don't feel like I deserve to be happy and I am so lucky you believe in me."

"I don't ever want to hurt you," says Austin.

"You won't," says Sami, "You couldn't."

"I love you," says Austin, "This is your ring and I want you to wear it for all the Days Of Our Lives."

"I love you," says Sami.

Austin must be in the early stages of Alzheimer's. He has to go downstairs because he forgot the dessert wine. He leaves so EJ can rant again. EJ tells Sami it's time to tell Austin. Sami knows. Here we go again, blah, blah, blah.

Austin comes back with Lucas and Carrie. He tells them about giving Sami her engagement ring. Carrie runs up to looks at it and is nearly blinded. Lucas says, "That's certainly a lot nicer than the one I got you."

Sami says, "Lucas, I've told you a thousand times... size doesn't matter." He asks if she is happy, because she doesn't look happy to him.

Sami asks, "Why? You think I am supposed to still be in love with you?"

"I can tell something is going on," says Lucas. Carrie slaps him around and tells him to knock it off. Austin asks about the baby. Lucas and Carrie stare.

Kayla wants to know what is going on. Patch introduces Della. We find out she and Patch haven't really tied the knot. The marriage isn't official. He tells Della about Steve Johnson. Della says, "Oh, Little Miss Perfect – your wife. Don't tell me he even changed diapers. Not the Nick we know and love. I don't believe it."

Patch gives a nervous laugh, "It's true. I even took a DNA test."

Della tells Kayla to stay the hell out of their lives. Kayla walks off. "I've been worried about you," says Della, "This is your life now. Let's have a beer and catch up."

"Give me a minute to talk to Kayla," says Patch.

"Make it fast," snorts Della.

Patch has Kayla sit down. He tells her he's sorry. She wonders when he was going to tell her about Della. He says he didn't tell because she didn't ask. Kayla asks, "How serious is it? Do you love her?" Patch stares.

Max wants to know what the brat is doing. The little snot says, "You were busy fixing your car with Stephanie. What was I supposed to do – read Auto Mechanic?"

"Forget it," Max storms out. Stephanie follows.

Abby comes up to the brat, "That went well."

"They'll be back. Don't worry," says the brat.

"I'm a horrible mess," says Belle. No one disagrees.

Phillip lectures her. She has to help him get through this. Mimi arrives to complete the set. Shawn says they all have to talk. He talks about custody. They live across the hall so it will be convenient.

"Too convenient," growls Phillip.

Mimi chimes in, "We all need to be honest about everything. There is something you all need to know. There is something I know that will change everything. I've been keeping it a secret because I'm scared of losing you, Shawn. You are Claire's biological father."

Belle can't believe it, "We've never been together."

Mimi 'splains how things happened at the burning barn. She talks about how Shawn's blood for the transfusion matched Claire's, while Phillip's didn't. Shawn takes her aside with more questions. He wants to know how she could possibly know this. She tells him about overhearing the nurses talking about the blood test.

Belle turns on her hysteria afterburners, "So you've known about this – and you didn't tell us?"

Shawn becomes unhinged, "How many times did I tell you to trust in me? We got married under false pretenses! I'm going to get an annulment!" He turns to Phillip, "I have respected you and your marriage. Now, it's like this IVF mix-up was fate. Belle and I still love each other. We will finally be a family together." Belle and Shawn ride off into the sunset.

Phillip turns his wrath on Mimi, "If I'm going to lose Belle and Claire, I'm not losing my baby! I will sue for custody!"

"You seem awfully upset," says Mimi, "Maybe you should go for another drive."

Fortunately, Prevuze readers are too smart to buy any of this. We all wake up from Mimi's little nightmare. She changes her mind about saying what she was going to say. She says this is hard for Phillip and her, "Fighting isn't going to solve anything. We have to get through this together – the four of us."

Shawn says Phillip is the father but he wants to be a part of the kid's life. He hopes they will always be friends, "I believe we can do this but we have to be in it together. What do you say?" Phillip stares.

Austin toasts the baby. Lucas whispers to Carrie, "So you didn't tell them you aren't pregnant?" Carrie wants to make it a special night for Sami. Lucas tells her that's just why he loves her so much – she's always thinking of others. He talks about adopting. He wouldn't trade places with anyone. Hugs.

Austin toasts Sami, "To us – one day having a baby like Lucas and Carrie."

Bottoms up. EJ whispers in Sami's ear, "Now would be a good time."

"I have something I want to say to you all," says Sami, "It's something I think could change all of our lives forever."

Back at the dive. Della watches as Patch and Kayla talk. Patch stammers, "I've been with a few... several..." Kayla has heard enough. She shuts him up.

He tells her his life isn't what she is used to. Kayla tells him Steve Johnson isn't that different from Nick Stockton. She used to go with him to the Cheatin' Heart all the time. He tells her he isn't the right kind of guy for her. She tells him he needs to be with her. Patch says, "Until I can remember you, you're just my wife on paper. I think you're beautiful and good but until I remember you I can't be your husband."

She lectures him for not mentioning Della, "Were you just playing me?"

Patch says, "The truth is, even though we share a daughter I don't feel the same connection to you. I know that's not what you want to hear. Try to understand."

Stephanie chases Max down. He riles against Chelsea. He's sick of her games. Stephanie says Chelsea doesn't understand racers. Max has never wanted a serious relationship before. Now he does, but he doesn't think it should be this hard.

"Face it," says Stephanie, "Maybe you just weren't meant to be with Chelsea."

The brat suggests Abby go ask someone to dance. Abby reminds her she's dating Josh. One guy is plenty for Abby. She thinks the brat is afraid Max is caring too much about her, "You remind me of your cousin Sami."

Cousin Sami rambles, "I want the best for both of you, and you too, Austin. But before we can live happily ever after, I have to apologize for what I have done. I know I have hurt you all in the past. Austin, I can't help but think of the first time. Things are so different now. Oh, God, I could go on and on." Please don't.

Lucas says they all know what she has done. Lucas has two great loves – Carrie and the sound of his own voice.

"I'm lucky because you all have forgiven me," says Sami, "I want to thank you for that. Austin, you are such an amazing person and loving you has made me a better, and more talkative person."

Austin says he is proud of her.

"I wanna be a good role model to Lucas and Carrie's baby," says Sami, "Carrie, I am so excited for you. You will be a great mom. Carrie can't take it. She excuses herself. Lucas follows.

"Was it something I said," asks Sami.

Shawn tells Phillip this is hard but he and Belle are committed to their respective marriages. Belle has always been there for Phillip, "Don't turn your back on her." A mousy-looking Belle stares at Phillip.

The brat insists she will never be like Sami, "She is a loser when it comes to guys. I hear she has a closet full of wedding dresses. I know how to handle men. I will be with Max. I'm not going to let him end up with that bitch Stephanie."

Max thinks maybe Stephanie is right. Maybe folks like them aren't cut out for long-term relationships. Stephanie doesn't buy it. She thinks she takes after her dad, "He was wild when he was younger, but then he settled down. I'm sure he hasn't been in a bar fight in years. That's what I want." Max turns. She stares longingly at him.


Kayla thought Patch was becoming convinced his heart was in Salem. Della invites him to dance. He says no. Della goes into high gear, "Just one question – do you remember making love to this woman... I didn't think so. But you remember us making love. This is your life. This is where you belong. I'm not giving up on you. And I know you're not giving up on me. I'll wait by the bar." Patch and Kayla stare at each other.

Patch tells Kayla he never should have brought her there. He doesn't know if he is any good for her, "What if the DiMeras come after you and Stephanie because of me?"

Kayla says, "It was hard to live without you believing you were dead, but to live without you knowing you are alive and with someone else..."

Patch asks, "If I don't remember you, how can I be your husband?"

Max hopes they both find true love someday. He thinks Stephanie needs a guy who appreciates her intelligence, beauty and courage. He won't have that kind of relationship with Chelsea.

Abby warns Chelsea she will lose Max, "You never learn until you get burned." Chelsea goes back out to party.

Phillip knows his family needs him. He will never abandon them. He tells Belle he loves her and Claire and doesn't want to lose them. She was so afraid she was going to lose him.

Shawn tells Mimi things will work out as long as they are honest with each other. Dishonest Mimi stares.

Austin leaves to check and see if Carrie is OK.

"That was quite a little speech," says EJ, "Your friends have forgiven you for all this? And this secret is the worst thing you have ever done?"

"That's debatable," says Sami.

"Bloody hell," says EJ, "You need to tell Austin right now."

Carrie bawls. Lucas tries to help, "Honey, I know you're upset, but there's a baby out there somewhere..."

She cuts him off at the knees, "STOP IT, LUCAS! NO! I can't. I made a huge mistake." Austin comes up to the door and stares open jawed. FF.


Max asks, "Who would do something like this?" Stephanie says, "You have to ask?" Max says, "Steph, I'm sorry... I'm sorry." He hugs her as the brat watches.

Patch tells Kayla, "I don't want to hurt you more than I already have. It's time to say goodbye." Kayla looks hurt.

EJ tells Sami, "Your future lies in your hands. You need to make a choice."

Carrie tells Lucas, "I only married you because I thought I was pregnant." Austin listens outside and nearly has a heart attack.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Lying, Cheating, Two-Timing Womanizer

Mimi repeats what she said about Shawn being Claire's father. Patrick asks, "Shawn is Claire's father – not Phillip? So they already have a child together, and now with the IVF they will have a second one."

"Yes," says Mimi, "Shawn and Belle always dreamed of having a large family. They don't know about Claire. But when they find out, I guarantee you they will want to be together."

Belle sees Shawn is still at the hospital. Shawn asks about Phillip. "He'll survive," says Belle, "But he'll still be a moron."Belle thinks the crash was her fault, "He thought I was happy about having your baby and he was right."

"We have to talk about that," says Shawn.

"I can't help it," whines Belle, "I have dreamed about this since we started dating. It's like it was meant to be."

"My parents are kaput," says Shawn, "I can't dream of putting Mimi through a divorce. There is only one thing we can do."

Bo the chump begs for another chance. He swears he will do his damnedest to prove he didn't tamper with the evidence. If he can't prove it, Hope says she can never believe him again, and for the umpteenth time their marriage will be over.

Kayla and Patch are on a plane headed for Cincinnati. She tells him about the time they went to Cleveland. That's when she first started falling in love with him. He hopes the trip to Cincinnati isn't a wasted trip for her. She thinks they will find answers there. Patch thinks there isn't much to go on. Kayla suddenly shifts gears, "Maybe going back isn't a good idea. Whoever did this went to a lot of trouble to keep us apart. Now that we're together..."

Patch says, "I'm starting to think someone took my memory away deliberately, and I think I know why."

Hope says, "I'm sorry. I can't just take your word for it. You have lied about so many things."

"I would do anything," says Bo, "But I swear on my life I'm not lying about this."

"Then how does all the evidence point to you," asks Hope.

"I explained all that," says Bo, "I was getting evidence on another case. I didn't disable the camera."

"I saw you come up to it and disable it," says Hope, "I know... you thought you heard a strange noise and didn't know the camera was there. Just coincidence. The only explanation is – you did it."

Bo says, "No, I did not steal the evidence. I don't want Chelsea to go to prison, but I wouldn't do that to you."

"There is nothing more you can say," says Hope, "I'm going through with the divorce unless you can show me real proof. It may be for the best. I'm having another man's child. I'm not forgetting what happened with JT. You checked out. You couldn't handle it. You abandoned us when we needed you."

"I'm sorry."

"I've forgiven you," says Hope, "But I can never forget. And I'll see to it you damned well won't either. Experience tells me you can't live with raising another man's child. Especially Patrick's.

"My pop is not my biological father," says Bo, "But he loves me more than anything. I was angry when I found out Victor was my father. But that didn't matter. I will love this baby the same way my pop loved me."

"Just prove to me you didn't tamper with the evidence," says Hope.

"I can do that," says the bobblehead.

Hope says, "I hope so. I want more than anything to believe in you again."

Bo says, "And you will. I'm not gonna lose you, Fancy Face."

Hope says, "Yeah, well, you're not talking to the boat." He kisses her on the forehead and leaves.

Patch thinks maybe he had knowledge of something that threatened someone. He thinks all this fits Stefano's MO. He has done research on Stefano, "He had a talent for making people appear dead who weren't." Patch wonders if that's what happened to him. He wonders what Stefano might have had against him. Kayla tells him about Benji, who was Stefano's son. She doesn't know where Benji is now.

Patch's casket has been exhumed. He hope's it's empty. Kayla knows they will find some answers in Cincinnati. The mystery will be solved.

Patrick wants to know how Shawn and Belle don't know about Claire but Mimi does. Mimi says, "I don't think they were fully conscious or in possession of all their faculties at the time."

"There is nothing unusual about that," says Patrick.

Mimi goes on, "According to Belle, in order to keep warm that night, they used body heat. Later, they suffered from smoke inhalation and were rescued completely naked. Belle remembers but thinks it was a dream. All I know is they still think they never had sex. When Claire was sick, Shawn's blood type was a match and Phillip's wasn't. I told Mom what I suspected, and she found out beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Mimi says she wanted to tell but Bonnie wouldn't let her. Patrick wishes she had come to him. He says it's not too late to blab.

Belle asks if Shawn is saying they should leave their respective spouses. Shawn says no. Belle whines around and urges him to reconsider. She thinks the baby was meant to be – just like they are. Shawn insists they are committed to other people. Father Jansen married us in good faith.

Belle throws a fit, "I didn't marry Phillip in good faith. My wedding vows are a lie. Of course, I don't remember much about my wedding after you dropped in."

Maggie and Alice have dropped in on Hope. That called for tea from the big pot. They have been worried about her since hearing the news about the baby... and Patrick. Maggie is thrilled for Hope. Alice thinks the baby is a blessing. Hope thinks it's like God had a conversation with Zack and sent the baby to Hope.

Alice reminds her a child needs a father. Hope knows, "But the fact is Patrick will be a part of this child's life whether we are together or not. But if there is any chance for Bo and me..."

"Then the baby will have three parents," says Maggie.

Maggie remembers Melissa, "True love wins in the end, Hope. I promise you."

Billie is distraught. Chelsea hasn't signed up for community service. She could still go to jail for contempt. Bo thinks it might do her good. He has to check on what happened to the evidence. Billie volunteers to help. Bo spots evil officer Michaels. He tells her he has a couple questions for her.

Billie rushes up behind Bo and says, "Bo! I know who did it."

Kayla and Patch wander around the seedy side of town. This is the place Patch told her about. He has been coming here for as long as he can remember – literally. He says they don't have to go inside. Kayla wants to. They might find a clue.

After they go on in, The Hand waves. The stooge says, "I got it. I know what to do."

Everyone inside the bar greets Patch, "Hey look who's here... the long lost Nick Stockton!"

Some guy at the pool table asks Patch, "Hey, where is the ten bucks you owe me? Come on. Let's play a game of pool. Maybe you can win it back." Patch declines, but it's old home week in the seedy joint.

The stooge interrupts the bartender while she is talking to Patch and Kayla. "Keep your shirt on," she says.

Patch introduces Kayla to the crowd. The bartender yanks him away from Kayla to celebrate with shooters on the house.

Mr. Stooge immediately hits on Kayla. Kayla says she is with Nick. "Let me give you free advice," says Stoogie, "Don't get involved with him. He's nothing but a lying, cheating, two-timing womanizer. He's broken a lot of hearts."

Patch sees Stoogie moving in on Kayla. He comes up behind him and sucker punches the guy. Stoogie staggers off and picks up a broken bottle. He comes back waving it at Patch.

The Hand watches.

Patrick tells Mimi it's still not too late to tell Shawn. Mimi thinks she would lose him, what with the brood Belle and Shawn will now have together. She blew things with Rex and Shawn. She has known about this secret practically since the beginning of time. Father Jansen told her he wouldn't marry them unless she told the truth, "But then fate stepped in and father Jansen told me our marriage isn't valid in the eyes of the church."

"OMG," says Patrick, "That means legally."

"I'm gonna be history," says Mimi.

Belle says before they were married she told Phillip she could never love him the way she loves Shawn. She was just so hurt and angry after Shawn left for his little vacation in Jan's cage. Belle married Phillip because she thought she would get over Shawn. What she did was unfair to both Shawn and Phillip.

Shawn tells Belle she just has to forget about him. She can't, "Wah-wah-wah, Phillip isn't the man that is meant for me. My-wah-marrying-wah-him-wah-was-wah-not-wah-just-wah-a-wah-mistake. Taking vows before God knowing they were lies... it's grounds for an annulment."


"I don't know about that," says Shawn, "But it's grounds for burning in hell."

BAR FIGHT! Mr. Stooge swings the bottle. Patch hits him with a chair. A dazed Mr. Stooge warns Kayla to stay away from Patch as he staggers out of the dive.

"Welcome back Nick," screams the pool player.

Kayla wants to know what the guy knows.

Outside, Stoogie tells The Hand, "Next time get somebody else to do your dirty work. When he finds out what you are up to, watch out!"

Maggie wants to know how Bo feels about this situation. Hope tells her Bo says he can handle it, "Bo has to prove he didn't tamper with the evidence."

Billie backs off. She says she just has her suspicions it was someone from the inside. Bo turns and asks Eve about the incident. She says she didn't see anyone in there. He asks for a list of visitors to the court and jailhouse that day. Eve tells him she knows he didn't have anything to do with it and she will do what she can to track down the perp – but she thinks the odds are against them.

Bo swears he will track down the guy who did it.

Shawn reels, "Don't even think about an annulment. Think what it would do to Claire. We both have responsibilities. I love Claire so much. She deserves to have her parents together."

"What about our baby," whines Belle.

"Legally that baby is yours and Phillip's," says Shawn, "If you would just commit to Phillip completely I know it could work. You just have to keep believing and forget about us."

Belle throws the mother of all fits, "I-wah-bawl-can't-sniffle-sniffle."

"Whatever happens I'm not leaving Mimi," says Shawn, "I would not betray her trust any more than she would betray mine."

Miss trust-betrayal says Shawn still hasn't forgiven his dad for betraying Hope. Patrick says things are still up in the air but Hope could go back to Bo. Mimi tells him he will always have a child to bond him to Hope, "unlike Shawn and me."

"You can still fix this," says Patrick, "You can't go on like this. You will fall apart."

Mimi asks, "What if when I tell him he does leave me?"

Patrick hugs her, "You win some, you lose some."

Shawn is sorry he's telling Belle something she doesn't want to hear. Mimi and I promised to be together for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health all the Days Of Our Lives."

Belle floods the room with her tears, "What isn't right is the fact we love each other and can't be together."

Shawn paddles upstream, "You belong with Phillip and I belong with Mimi and that's the end of it."

Mimi wonders why life always has to be so hard for them. She wonders why she didn't learn her lesson with Rex. But she tells Patrick he will get his happy ending with Hope, "I know you will."

Maggie says Bo will move heaven and earth to get back to Hope. "There is just one thing I need from Bo," says Hope.

Alice says, "And you will get it."

Bo thanks Billie for helping. She insists he will get Hope back.

Evil Eve is on the phone. She talks to The Hand, so to speak, "So you think you can hang me out to dry! You gave me the idea to mess with the evidence. I'm gonna need more money... Good! When you get back, you better have the cash and be ready to stop Bo in his tracks!"

Patch insists Mr. Stooge was nobody, " He's someone who has it out for me."

Miss hot-to-trot sashays into the bar, "Nicky baby! I missed you so much! Give me a kiss, lover!" She plants a big one on him.

Kayla pulls her away, "Who the hell are you?"

Ole tough-as-nails snorts, "I'm his wife. Who the hell are you?"

Kayla says, "I'm his wife, too, but you shouldn't let that bother you. He is a charter member of the Jennifer Horton, 'Collect The Entire Series' Club."

Patch & Kayla. FF.


Mimi says, "We all need to be honest about everything. There is something you all need to know."

Lucas says, "Now that you're not pregnant with our baby, what are you saying? Are you saying you didn't want to marry me?"

Kayla asks Patch, "How serious is it? Do you love her?"

Sami tells the clueless quartet, "I have something I want to say to you all. It's something I think could change all of our lives forever."

In other words, Sami and Mimi are reading from the same script tomorrow

Monday, July 24, 2006

Bad Luck Runs In Threes

Billie comes into the hospital. Bo asks what she is doing there. She just visited Jack. He isn't doing so well. Bo is there to pick up some prenatals for Hope. They aren't back together, but the pharmacy left a message on his cell phone by mistake. He thought he would do a good deed. Billie asks, "You're not giving up on her, are you?" Bo looks away.

Hope picks up a stuffed ducky as Patrick finishes fixing the kitchen sink. He asks if there is anything else he can do. "I haven't seen the bill yet," she says.

"For you," says Patrick, "free of charge."

"You're the best," says Hope.

Patrick gets down to brass tacks, "Sooner or later, we have to talk about this. You're having my baby."

Carrie whines, "I decided to marry Lucas because I wanted a baby of my own. I thought it was a sign Austin and I weren't meant to be. I even had morning sickness when I wasn't pregnant. How many lives have I affected?"

Lexie tries to mitigate things, "There is a small chance you could get pregnant."

"You said there was less than one percent," whines Carrie, "Lucas was so excited about being a father again. If I had known... I wouldn't have married him."

Sami stares at the rock of Gibraltar shining up at her, "That ring is perfect."

"It's the one you wanted," says Austin.

"I know," says Sami, "But I can't accept it."

"You said yes when I proposed before," says the confused Austin.

"I know," says Sami, "But I can't take the ring. It's too expensive. I'd like the Taj Mahal but I don't expect to live there. Why do you even love me?"

"I would give you a list," says Austin, "But I don't ant to embarrass EJ. You were very clear at the jeweler's. You picked this one." He takes a knee, "From now on, I want to give you all that's in my power to give. I want to be your husband now and for all the Days Of Our Lives. Will you be my wife?"

Sami bawls, "Yes, of course I will be, Austin." Kiss. EJ watches.

Austin says, "Whew!" He puts the ring on her finger. Heavy-duty kiss.

Dr. Flooze tells Carrie, "Your relationship with Lucas looks like the real thing as opposed to the humpfest I've been having with Tek." Carrie says it's not the same kind of love she feels for Austin. She wanted to marry Austin more than anything, but when Lexie told her they couldn't have children she chose a family over her love for Austin. Now, she knows she would have married Austin. Lexie assures her it wasn't her fault.

Sami and Austin break it up. Austin goes downstairs to bring up the dinner. Sami tells EJ she is a coward. EJ says it's understandable. Sami doesn't want to ruin Austin's happiness. EJ says she has to tell before somebody else does.

Hope says, "I'll get us some tea."

Patrick stops her, "I don't want no stinkin' tea. We have to talk." Patrick wants to be involved in the kid's life. Hope says he will. That is the only thing she is clear about. Bo is the third side of the triangle...

"Patrick," says Hope, "I don't know what I want." Patrick's phone rings. Mimi tells him she needs him. She is at the trauma center. Patrick tells Hope he is there for her. He'll talk to her soon. Patrick leaves. Hope feels her tummy and stares.

Bo tells Billie there have been times he's wondered about trying to hold on to Hope. Even though the baby isn't his he still wants to be her husband, but she doesn't want him.

"Yes she does," says Billie, "You have to convince her to listen to her heart."

Bo says he will be there for Hope. He misses her, "You know that ache you get in your heart."

"I've been there," Billie reminds him.

"I'm sorry," says Bo, "I keep sticking my foot in my mouth."

Billie disagrees, "No, it's permanently implanted there. If there is anything I can do you just have to ask. That's what friends are for, right?"

Patrick joins Mimi. "I’m going to lose Shawn," she whines.

Sami admires the ring. EJ tells her it's dazzling. Sami asks him to understand this is everything she has ever wanted. "I've been to the altar so many times, I am a joke in this town, but it will be different this time. This is my third time with Austin. You know what they say about the third time, don't you?"

"Bad luck runs in threes," asks EJ.

"No," snaps Sami, "Third time is a charm. I'm asking you to let us un-postpone the wedding. I will be your personal slave if you let us get married right now."

EJ chastises her, "We've had a dozen conversations about this and now you're deciding not to tell him."

"He will never forgive me," says Sami, "If someone tells him I can come up with some excuse and blame them. Once we are married it will be different. I am not telling Austin and you can't tell him either. Swear on your mother's life."

Austin prepares dinner. He squirts some whipped cream his finger and licks it off. This prompts a memory of a dinner with Carrie, when she smeared whopped cream on his lips and kissed him.

Austin smiles as Billie comes in. He tells her he is making dinner for Sami. Billie says, "You may be cooking dinner for Sami but you're thinking about Carrie, aren't you?"

Lexie's cell phone interrupts her. It's a text message, "DON'T DO IT!"

"Don't do it," repeats Lexie.

"Don't do what," asks Carrie, "Lexie, what's the matter?"

The Hand closes his/her/its cell phone.

Bo arrives at Hope's door. She stares.

"Bo Brady," he says, "I used to live here." He tells her he got her vitamins for her. The chump pours his heart out to her and begs for another chance.

Patrick tells Mimi to calm down. You can't stop a runaway locomotive. She babbles, "Belle is having my husband's baby. I might as well pack my bags and get out of town. My life with Shawn is over."

Austin wants to know what makes Billie think that. "Because of the googly-eyed look on your face."

"Don't try to cause trouble," says Austin, "I am worried about her." He tells her about the fire.

Billie is there because she is worried about Austin. She has a feeling Sami is the wrong woman for him, "You will always love Carrie. Do you think it's a good idea to marry Sami?"

EJ asks how Sami knows his mother is even a part of his life, "Sometimes you need to think before you speak."

"That's no fun," says Sami. She insists she won't tell Austin the truth. He has to promise not to tell either. She begs.

EJ asks, "What would you do to me if I did tell?"

"You don't want to find out," she threatens, "Just be my friend."

"If I was any real friend to you I'd go tell Austin right now," says EJ, "but you can have it your way."

"Thank you," says Sami, "Let me explain something. She shows him the initials on the door. Lucas and Carrie... Carrie and Austin, "Carrie has her initials carved all over this town and her name on a few bathroom walls. I spent my life living in her shadow. It makes me stuck as a fifteen year old. That's when everything changed. I lost my mom when I was young and then she came back when I was fifteen. I thought my life would be perfect from then on. Of course I was wrong. But for a couple months I couldn't have been happier. And that's when I met Austin. He makes me feel safe and secure and loved and that is all I have ever wanted."

"I'm glad you told me," says EJ, "It explains a lot.

"That's why I can't tell Austin the truth," says Austin, "I can't lose him."

Lexie stammers, "One of the nurses and I have given up caffeine and we are using the buddy system, and she knows I have the worst cravings right now... for coffee, that is."

"So what were you going to tell me," asks Carrie.

"I don't think I should be getting involved in your personal business," says Lexie, "Ruining your life is another thing, however. OK... just take it from someone who's going through a divorce, you need to let go and give Lucas a chance. If after a year or so you find out you're still pining for Austin, you should see a counselor. If that doesn't work, then maybe you should see a lawyer. I wish Abe would give me that chance."

"He did," says Carrie, "You just went straight to the lawyer stage."

Hope lets Bo in. She says it's not easy for her. He tells her he will do anything if she will just tell him what she wants. She wants what she can't have. She wants Zack. Bo would give his life to bring him back.

"You can't rewrite history," says Hope.

"Unless you're a DOOL writer," says Bo.

"I know you love Zack," says Hope, "But you chose Chelsea over us."

"I did what I thought was best," says Bo, "I have loved and needed one woman and it's always been you. I will live the rest of my life being the best husband to you and the best father to this baby."

Hope asks, "Are you gonna tell me you won't resent the fact it is Patrick's?"

Bo retreats into dreamland, "All we can do is move forward and create the most happy family we can. I think we can do it."

"What about Patrick," says Hope, "I need to do what's right with this baby and that means having him in the baby's life. Can you handle that?"

Mimi tells Patrick, "I wanna rip Belle's face off just thinking about it. She told Shawn she's happy having his baby. It's driving me crazy."

"You should be used to it, then," says Patrick.

"I don't think I can handle 9 months of this," says Mimi.

"You," says Patrick, "What about the viewers? He married you. He loves you."

"Now he has the best reason in the world to be with Belle," says Mimi.

Austin cooks and tells Billie he wants to drop the subject. We should be so lucky. He loves Carrie, but she is with Lucas. He has to move on and Sami has to move on.

"I'm all about moving on," says Billie, "But does it have to be with Sami?"

"You're starting to sound like Mom," says Austin.

"Bo moved on with me," says Billie, "How do you think that worked out for me? Don't marry Sami on the rebound, when your heart still belongs to somebody else. Sami is a fragile person. When she gets hurt she lashes out and hurts the whole world."

"I'm not going to hurt her and she's not going to hurt me," says Austin, "So, would you join us for dinner?"

"Why do I sense an ulterior motive," asks Billie.

"There is none," says Austin as he drops the ulterior motive on her, "We are family and EJ is going to be there."


Austin asks, "Do you want to live in limbo the rest of your life too?"

"I am not interested in EJ Wells," says Billie, "I'm going to take my sweet time finding the right partner and I think you should do the same."

"You're running out of time... sweet or otherwise," says Austin.

Carrie says, "You're right. Love isn't the most important thing in life. Honor is important too. Austin is getting ready to marry my sister. I'd be incredibly selfish to mess that up. But I won't mess it up anyway. I owe it to Lucas. I don't love him as much as I do Austin, but it has to be enough to work things out."

EJ asks, "Are you sure Austin is the man of your dreams?"

"Since I was a teenager," says Sami.

"Then tell him the truth," says EJ, "You can at least start with a clean slate. You've been through this with Austin before. You can go through it again. If it doesn't work out, you know there's going to be a whole line of men to take you out." Sami smiles.

Bo tells Hope he can handle anything if they are together, including Lockhart being the kid's father. "The biggest problem is you," says Hope, "I don't trust you."

Bo grovels, "There's gotta be something I can do."

Hope says, "Prove to me you didn't tamper with the evidence that kept Chelsea out of jail. Maybe we can work on rebuilding our marriage."


Patrick says Hope is pregnant with his child, so he knows something about situations like this. He loves Hope but it doesn't mean they will be together. Mimi insists Belle now has the perfect excuse for being with Shawn, "I mean, when you already share a child together..."

Patrick asks, "What do you mean already share a child?"

"That's what I need to tell you," says Mimi, "Shawn is Claire's biological father." FF.


Hope says, "I want more than anything to believe in you again. Bo says, "And you will. I'm not gonna lose you, Fancy Face."

Mimi asks, "What if when I tell him he does leave me?" Patrick hugs her, "That's just a chance you're going to have to take."

Belle tells Shawn, "I didn't marry Phillip in good faith. My wedding vows are a lie."

Kayla asks, "Who the hell are you?" Ole tough-as-nails snorts, "I'm his wife. Who the hell are you?"

Friday, July 21, 2006

Play At Your Own Risk

Stephanie and Max work on the twisted Phillip-mobile. The more they work on it the less big-time racer Max thinks there is to salvage. Max doesn't get why Stephanie is helping him. "Maybe I don't see you as competition," she says, "Seriously, this is fun for me. I know how much this car means to you. I think racecars are a lot like relationships. Sometimes they can turn out to be a lot more trouble than they are worth."

Abby and Chelsea are at the hospital. The brat tries to be upbeat about Jack's condition. Abby goes to say goodbye before they head out for a night on the town.

"There's got to be a way to get rid of Mrs. Goodwrench," says the little snot. She leafs through a magazine, "That's it!"

Frankie tells Lexie he wishes there was something he could do. Lexie says, "Maybe there is... follow me."

Maggie helps Austin prepare dinner on the rooftop. Austin's phone rings. It's Carrie. He tells her he is ready for them any time they want to come up. She says they can't make it – Lexie wants to talk to them. He suggests maybe they can join them for dessert.

Sami comes out dressed to kill. EJ tells her she looks beautiful. She says, "I don't know why I bothered to get dressed up, since this night isn't going to happen."

EJ says, "If Austin can't forgive you for what you have done then he doesn't deserve you." Sami says that's sweet of him but he wouldn't mean it if he knew what she had done.

EJ insists Austin will forgive her if she tells the truth, "I've made plenty of mistakes... one in particular. I should never have let her go. I feel if I had really fought for her maybe things would have worked out. That's why it's important that you fight for Austin."

"I'm all for that," says Sami, "I just have to find a way to make him understand."

Austin walks in. He says, "You look amazing. This is a night neither one of us will forget for all the Days Of Our Lives." EJ wonders if he should give them some time alone. Austin says no... the surprise is ready.

Sami blurts out, "Before we go I have to talk to you about something important and it's about Carrie."

Lexie meets Carrie and Lucas. She puts her best look of concern on and says, "I am so sorry."

Max wonders if Stephanie is talking about Chelsea and him. He says she's only acting this way because she is jealous of Stephanie, "Once you see who she really is, behind all those walls she has put up... you'll find a really despicable person."

The brat reads an article, "How to keep your man crazy for you." The subtitle is, "If he's dating you, he must already be crazy."

Abby offers to stay with Jack. Jennifer declines and says maybe Abby should go out and have some fun. Abby agrees and asks Jennifer to call if she needs her.

Abby leaves. Jennifer says, "Jack, our little girl is growing up. She still needs her daddy. Why isn't this medicine working? Are you going to give up?" She yawns, "Heavens, this show is even boring me."

"I saw that," says Frankie "It's time for a break." Jennifer says she should stay. Frankie talks her into leaving.

"Where are we going," asks Jennifer.

"Come with me and I'll show you," says Frankie. As they leave, Jack gives them a sideways glance.

Austin says he already knows about Carrie. She called and told him she and Lucas couldn't make it. EJ offers to leave them alone again. Austin says no. EJ insists on grabbing a bottle of champagne. He leaves.

Sami says there is something important to talk about. Austin drags her up to the roof without another word.

Up on the roof Sami wonders how Austin got all this done. He tells her Maggie and her staff helped. Sami wants to know what this is all about.

He tells her he wants to show her and their friends how much she means to him, "I have a much bigger surprise in store for you. This will all make sense afterwards." EJ hugs his bottle of champagne and watches.

"I don't know how to tell you this," says Dr. Slut, "There is no baby."

"I lost the baby," gasps Carrie.

"No," says Lexie, "You didn't lose it. You were never pregnant."

Carrie protests, "But the test was positive."

"Sometimes you get a false positive with a home pregnancy test. We doctors insist on that so you'll still need us to perform the expensive tests."

Carrie says, "But I haven't had a..."

Lexie cuts her off, "Don't you dare say that word on TV. That could be from the stress of getting married. Psycho shower scene music plays in the background, "You had a hysterical pregnancy."

Carrie follows that up with a hysterical fit. Ever-helpful Lucas says, "We'll try again."

Lexie prepares to drop the other bomb, "Actually, there is something else I need to discuss. Remember after the appendectomy we talked about the scar tissue?"

Carrie begs, "Lexie don't tell me I can't have children." Lexie stares.

Max tells Stephanie, "You're not the first person to wonder what I see in Chelsea, and you darn well won't be the last."

Stephanie says, "It's a known fact Max Brady has an eye for cute girls. So you're right. It really makes me wonder what you see in her. And that's girls... not just one. You have left a trail of broken hearts form Indianapolis to Daytona, not to mention broken cars. There must be more to her than meets the eye."

"There would have to be," says Max, "But she's working on the anorexia. She's complicated. She's not a bad person. She's a scared little girl inside."

"But you love her."

"Yeah," admits Max, "I love her. "There is something about her that makes me want to be a better person to make up for the fact she has no socially redeeming characteristics at all. I want to marry her someday. What about you?"

Stephanie says, "Actually, there is someone special in my life... or was."

Abby and the brat walk into Dune. Abby asks what her big plan is.

The brat looks around the room and spots some guy who has been freshly dipped in sleaze, "Hooking up with him. I'll make Max see he's got some serious competition."

Maggie comes into Jack's room. She tells him Jennifer is with Frankie, "I'll go get her."


"Why not?"

"She's with Frankie," says Jack, "This should be their honeymoon."

Lexie apparently has helped Frankie cook up a secret rendezvous with Jennifer. Lexie is good at cooking up secret rendezvous. She has years of experience at it. Frankie takes Jennifer into a room where they can be alone. She thanks him for always taking care of her. "There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you," says Frankie, "I love you."

EJ backs off as Austin and Sami kiss. Austin tells her she will find out soon enough what is going on. He sees EJ and invites him over.

Austin leaves to open the champagne. "I take it you didn't tell," says EJ.

"I didn't have time," says Sami. Austin serves champagne. He says he forgot something downstairs. He leaves and promises to be right back.

Get your zappers, folks – here it comes. They go over the well-trodden ground they have already been over. Blah, blah, blah. Sami decides Austin won't go for Carrie because he would never break up a family. She promises to tell him as soon as he gets back. Pigs fly overhead.

Austin rummages through a bag and finds a ring box. He pockets it and looks at a picture of Carrie on his way out.

"I wish I didn't have to tell you this," says Lexie. Lucas asks if she is telling them Carrie can't get pregnant with all the IVF methods and drugs available. Lexie gives them the bad news, "Based on your hormone levels, your chances are less than 1%."

The brat says she had her fingers crossed when she promised Max she would only date him. Abby reels, "What! Are you in second grade? He's not losing interest in you. His racecar just got totaled. What is wrong with you?"

"I can't answer that," says the brat, "The show is only an hour long." But a big part of it is Stephanie Johnson. She wants him, Abby. He likes her too."

"Not like that," insists Abby.

"How could he not," asks the little snot, "She's gorgeous and she's a grease monkey. They could have grease monkey sex."

Abby says, "If you go through with this plan you will lose him for good."

"This article says you should get your man jealous," she says.

Abby yanks the magazine away. "You didn't read the side article. It also says it's the number one way to lose him. 'Play at your own risk.'"

The brat says, "It says it's effective if you know what you are doing. And I do." She takes out her phone and texts Max.

Max gets the message, "Chelsea is at dune and she wants to have a drink. Why don't you come along?"

Stephanie says, "If you're sure... all right I accept." Max texts Chelsea to let her know he's on his way.

The brat gets the message, "He's on his way. And when he gets here I'm gonna be prepared." She goes over to the sleazer at the bar.

Jennifer tells Frankie his patience and kindness mean a lot to her. They are newlyweds and haven't had any time together, "I have been selfish by staying with Jack. So many husbands, so little time. Are you going to wait forever?"

"I know you love him," says Frankie, "I knew it when I married you." Kiss.

The brat turns on what little charm she has, "Something tells me you would be a very good dancer among other things."

"Likewise," says the sleazer as oil drips.

Abby pulls Chelsea away and tells her she is self-destructing, "Why are you trying to pick up a complete stranger?"

"He's not a stranger," says the brat as she turns around, "I'm sorry, what is your name again?"


She turns back to Abby, "He's Dax. With a D."

Mr. Creep chimes in, "I have a question. Can you tie a cherry stem in a knot with your tongue?"

"Now there's a pickup line you don't hear every day," says the brat, "No... Why don't you show me how." Creepo sticks a cherry stem in his mouth and goes through a series of mouth machinations reminiscent of a camel about to hurl. He sticks his tongue out revealing a cherry stem with a perfect half-hitch.

Chelsea is wwaayy impressed, "Yyyaaayyy! You did it." They kiss as Max and Stephanie walk in.

Maggie thought it might cheer Jack up to look at pictures of JJ. She shows him the pictures in an album, but suddenly pulls away. Jack wants to know what she didn't want him to see. He says if it was a picture of Frankie and Jen it's OK. She shows him. "Very nice says Jack. She looks happy. I'm happy for them. Especially Jennifer. It looks like she's fallen in love. That's what I wanted."

Frankie and Jennifer kiss. Frankie pulls away, "We shouldn't do this."

Jennifer says, "I need to do this... please." They dive in for more.

The hormonally-challenged Carrie bawls. Lucas tries to cheer her up, "We have Will, and we can adopt. The important thing is we have each other." The chump's phone rings. It's the contractor. She tells him to take it. He leaves.

Carrie breaks down. She can't believe this is happening. Lexie tries to comfort her. She says this won't change the fact Lucas loves her.

"It changes everything," bawls Carrie, "Except the fact that Lucas is a spineless idiot."

Lexie asks, "You mean you wouldn't have married him if you weren't pregnant?"

"I accepted before I knew I was pregnant," says Carrie, "But when I started having second thoughts, it was because of the baby that I decided to go through with it. What have I done?"

EJ says he will leave when Austin comes back. Sami says she needs him for moral support. Austin comes back with the ring. He takes a knee, "I know I already proposed but I want to make it official. There was one thing missing – a token of my love and commitment. Once I give it to you, only the love and commitment will be missing. Samantha Jean Gene Brady, will you be my wife?"

Sami doesn't hesitate, "No, Austin. I would love to, but I can't." Pan in on the shocked Austin. There goes dinner.



Hope says to Bo, "Prove to me you didn't tamper with the evidence that kept Chelsea out of jail. Maybe we can work on rebuilding our marriage."

Mimi tells Patrick, "Shawn is Claire's biological father."

Billie asks Austin, "You may be cooking dinner for Sami but you're thinking about Carrie, aren't you?"

EJ tells Sami, "You've been through this with Austin before. You can go through it again. If it doesn't work out, you know there's going to be a whole line of men to take you out."

Thursday, July 20, 2006

The Pathetic Loser

Austin wants to know why Sami is so upset. She has something to tell him.

Lucas is on the phone yelling at the contractor about getting the place fixed up, "Whaddya want us to do, live out of suitcases for two months?"

"No," says the contractor, "I just want to set it up so the clueless quad can get together in some sort of wacky living arrangement."

Lucas hangs up and apologizes to Carrie for yelling. Carrie holds up the charred baby book, "Look what happened to our baby book."

Max runs up to the track. He didn't realize things were this bad. He can't believe he ever told Phillip he could be his second. Stephanie tells him not to beat himself up. She hugs Max as the brat watchers.

Fuel drips.

Shawn tries to calm Belle down, "Look at me, I love you, OK?" He hesitates, "Uh, what I meant..."

Mimi attacks, "I know exactly what you meant. I will be at the hospital." Shawn chases her as Max' racecar goes supernova.

Carrie leafs through the ruined baby book. Lucas promises they will get her a new one. The important thing is she and the baby are OK. Carrie talks about Sami coming in to rescue him, "She cares about you. Do you ever wish it were you and Sami having this kid together?"

"Honestly, yeah," says Lucas, "We talked about having another child, even though we don't agree on everything when it comes to parenting. It's over between us though."

Carrie says, "It's hard to believe not too long ago I was living in LA, not even thinking of a family, and now look how things have changed. I can't believe Highstyle ever mattered to me, or its employees whose lives were destroyed. My life has turned around because of this baby. I'm not even showing and I'm on the Internet looking for college savings plans."

"I can't wait to get to know this baby," says Lucas, "I hope it's a girl and takes after you in every way." Smooch.

The firemen use their fire extinguishers on the smoldering tin can that was once a car, as Shawn asks Mimi if she is OK.

"I'm not hurt, but I'm not OK," whines Mimi, "I heard what you said. Belle is carrying your child just like you two planned and dreamed for. Stop lying to me. I'm the liar in this family. Belle is the love of your life and always will be. Do not insult my intelligence."

"I would never make an insult that low," says Shawn.

Belle lectures Phillip. Phillip sneers, "I would rather die than see you with him. Gasp-gasp!"

"What's wrong," asks Belle.

"Collapsed lung," says one of the EMT's.

Belle has a whine fest, "You said his vitals were fine. What's wrong?"

Mimi tells Phillip, "We are there for you."

EJ tells Max he's sorry about the car. Max needs to make arrangements to get what's left of it towed back to the garage. EJ leaves and Stephanie asks if Max is OK. Max tells her, "It's just a car."

She says, "It's OK to be upset." He thanks her for her understanding. They walk off.

The brat's phone rings. It's Abby. She tells the brat she got her text message. The brat says, "I need your help running a certain woman out of the race."

Austin wants to know why Sami is so tense. He rubs her shoulders. She says she has to tell him something bad. Austin's phone rings. Saved by the bell. He says they will talk at dinner. She begs him to stay and listen but he leaves. As he leaves, he tells her he has a surprise for her.

Carrie feels so bad about the apartment. Lucas apologizes for having the idea to light the candles. They decide the important thing is they are OK and will soon be in sunny Italy. Soon, the spare bedroom will turn into a nursery. Smooch. Carrie imagines Austin and really goes at it. Austin himself appears at the door.

The brat tells Abby about Phillip's wreck, "I kind of did something this morning... While Max was gone his phone rang. I saw it was Stephanie and I shut off his phone. I'm not just gonna sit back and let her make moves on my man."

Abby asks, "What are you gonna do next?"

"I'm gonna need your help," says the brat.

Max and Stephanie work on the twisted piece of metal. Max is upset with Phillip, "This is not just a car. Her and I have been through a lot."

"If one of you had to go I'm glad it was the car," says Stephanie. She offers to help him with the new car. He wonders why she is going out of her way to help him.

Chelsea and Abby walk in. "Could it be because my cousin has a thing for you," asks the brat.

The EMT's rush Phillip into the hospital room. Belle wails and flails. Lexie tells her to stay out of the room while she examines him. Phillip's breathing is labored. Dr. Slut works her magic. She doesn't think Phillip's lung is collapsed. He asks what is wrong. "Possibly fluid build up," she says. She lectures him with the understatement of the year, "You aren't a racecar driver." Phillip says he was just trying to blow off steam. She wonders why he would do something so reckless.

Phillip grits his teeth, "Because my wife is having Shawn's baby!"

Mimi and Shawn argue. He tries to convince her he loves her.

"You married me because Belle wasn't available," screams Meems, "When that baby is born it will just bring you even closer to her. I'm afraid you will want to be with her for all the Days Of Our Lives."

Shawn assures her, "It won't happen. I won't let it." Hugs.

Belle watches as Mimi says, "Please don't make promises you can't keep."

There is a knock at Sami's door. She answers and let's EJ in. He tells her about Phillip's accident, but says Phillip will be fine. Sami starts to call Belle but he stops her and asks if she has leveled with Austin. She says she tried, but he wouldn't listen, "He's out working on a surprise for me."

"You need to focus," says EJ, "If you don't tell him your world will come crashing down."

"It's just so hard," whines Sami.

"You need to find him now and tell him the truth," says EJ, "He's in Lucas' apartment."

Austin watches as Lucas and Carrie kiss, and remembers kissing Carrie. He knocks and interrupts the lovebirds. He asks about a box of CD's he left with Lucas before he went to New York. Lucas says he will find them for him. Lucas leaves and Austin asks Carrie how she is. She's fine but doesn't have the test results yet.

Lucas comes back with the CD's. Marvin Gaye, Barry White, Barry Manilow, what a combo. Austin asks when they will go on their honeymoon. Lucas says, "Not until the apartment is OK, because the sane thing to do would be to go away while they are working on it. Austin invites them to stay with him and Sami until it is fixed up. He's having a special dinner for Sami tonight and wants them to be there.

Sami stands at the door and listens. "No," she says, "You can't do that."

Stephanie accuses the brat of being jealous, "If Max had gotten the message in time he could have saved more of his car."

The brat says she has a good reason why she didn't tell Max Stephanie called, "She is stalking you. I think it's creepy. She was staring at us through the window at the pub."

Stephanie claims she was looking for her mom. Max supports Stephanie. He kicks the brat out, "I'll call you later."

The brat and Abby leave. Once they get outside, Abby says, "That went well."

The brat explodes, "I can't believe he defended her. And why didn't you support me."

"What you said sucked. That's why."

Phillip rambles about the baby kerfuffle. He thinks Shawn and Belle's old feelings will come back, "Shawn still loves her and now they will have a baby together."

Lexie reminds him, "You and Belle have a baby together. It's a baby you conceived together, not some screw up at a fertility clinic. What happened is unfortunate. But Shawn and Belle didn't do anything wrong. It was the hospital that screwed up. Think of the lawsuit you can hit it with. Don't let this destroy your marriage. How do you think Belle is feeling right now? Did you see how frightened she was? Talk to her and Shawn and Mimi. I'm sure you'll all come up with something you can live with."

Belle listens as Mimi rants. Shawn promises they will be raising a child together.

"Which child," yells Mimi, "The surrogate's or Belle's? Maybe we should swap partners."

"We will all figure it out together. Four heads are better than one. Unless, of course it's our four heads."

Belle joins them. Shawn wants to know what Phillip was thinking.

"I guess he just flipped out," says Belle, "Literally. But enough about Phillip... let's talk about ME. The fact that you and I are having a baby together completely freaked me out." Mimi looks on.


Sami says she didn't mean that the way it sounded. She just can't imagine Lucas and Carrie want to go out on the town tonight after all they have been through. The say they feel fine. Lucas accepts Austin's offer. Sami smiles. Mr. Milquetoast apologizes for accepting without consulting Carrie. The shrew grabs his throat and says, "Don't let it happen again, buster."

Austin leaves and tells Sami they will talk at dinner.

Sami says she is glad they are both OK and excuses herself.

Lucas thinks Carrie's body language isn't right. He asks if she is OK with the new living arrangement.

Sami storms in. She tells EJ she didn't tell Austin. EJ thinks she just doesn't want to tell him. "You're right," says Sami, "but I know I have to." She breaks down, "I think tonight is going to be my last dinner with him ever."

Max and Stephanie work on the car parts. Max wants to talk. He's sorry the brat gave her such a hard time. She insists it's not his fault, "If I were in her shoes I'd feel the same way. She doesn't want you working with a woman."

Max asks, "Is that what we ware doing... working?"

Stephanie says, "She might be afraid we're not just working."

The brat tells Abby, "When I'm done with Max, he's not even going to remember her name. But I can't believe you're siding with Stephanie." Abby wonders what happened to the new and improved Chelsea who was so happy she didn't have to go to prison.

The brat pouts, "I'm a pathetic loser, OK? I've probably lost Max forever."

"You haven't lost him yet."

"He totally shut me out."

"He was distracted," says Abby, "That car is so important to him."

"You're right," she says, "I haven't lost him yet. Two can play this game. I'm not going to just let her sink her claws into him, when I have two perfectly good claws myself."

Philip tells Lexie the mix-up with the embryos is something he has to do something about, "It's like being a marine. You have to hold your position."

Lexie says, "Before you go making any military maneuvers with your wife I want you to rest. I'll send Belle in shortly."

Mimi tells Shawn, "I hate to say what Phillip's crash reminds me of."

Shawn says, "Yeah, I've don't a lot of dumb things in my life and crashing my motorcycle through the window at the church is at the top of my list."

Mimi leaves. Belle says the fact about the baby isn't the only reason Phillip went ballistic, "He knows I want to have your baby. I couldn't want anything more." Mimi listens and stews.

Lexie sits at her desk and looks at Carrie's chart, "OMG! Can this be right? She picks up the phone, calls Carrie and tells her to come to her office with Lucas right away. Carrie hangs up and tells Lucas. Lucas wonders if Carrie asked Lexie what the problem is.

"No," says Carrie, "That would have made too much sense." Staredown.

EJ thinks the next note could go directly to Austin. Austin comes in. He invites EJ to join the rest of Salem at his romantic private dinner with Sami. His phone beeps. He says he will be back. Sami begs him to stay and talk. He tells her to meet him on the roof later as he rushes out.

Sami goes back in and asks, EJ, "Do you see?"

"Yes," says EJ, "I see. You just have to pin him down. Whatever happens, I promise I will be around to help. You can count on me."

"Thank you," says Sami, "If I am only going to have one best friend ever, I'm glad it's you." Hugs. Stalk. FF.


The brat is with some guy at a bar. She smiles and tells him "Yay, you did it." They kiss as Max and Stephanie walk in.

EJ tells Sami, "If Austin can't forgive you for what you have done then he doesn't deserve you."

Frankie tells Jennifer, "We shouldn't do this." Jennifer says, "I need to do this... please." Kiss.

Lexie says, "There is something else I need to discuss with you." Carrie begs, "Lexie don't tell me I can't have children."

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