Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Professor Scumsucker

Victor visits Stefano.

EJ wanders and wonders.

Phillip and Stephanie smooch. Phillip starts to drink the spiked lemonade, but Owen rushes onto the scene and bumps into him, careens over to the table, knocks it over and spills everything.

Nicole tells Baker good riddance on the phone. She hangs up and tells Sydney she dodged another bullet.

Owen cleans things up and apologizes. Magnanimous Phillip tells him, "Think nothing of it."

Owen gets a call. He answers to find it's EJ calling. Owen stammers around and lets EJ know he can't talk right now, "But I think you might want to consider changing your order."

Industrious Max polishes the sign outside the pub. Melanie comes up and gripes about working at the hospital. Max rambles on about OMB and how he started the pub and how Max has to keep the family tradition going, "Until I go off to med school, then I really don't give a flying leap."

Melanie joins the ramblin' chorus, "Yeah, OMB was a good guy, especially compared to our father, Professor Scumsucker. Max wishes they had grown up together. Melanie joins that chorus, too and they moan on about how much better childhood would have been if they had been together and been able to torment each other back then. Even Melanie realizes they are spreading it on a little thick, "I'm gonna buy a sign and hang it in my room, "Thou shalt not whine."

"Well," says Max, "At least it's a good thing you're not mixed up with the DiMera or the Kiriakis families any more." Melanie hesitates. Max gives her a look, "You're not... are you?"

Bo and Hope are inside the pub. Bo worries that Victor is going to ramp things up, "Something's going to happen."

"Brilliant police work," says Hope, "How do you do it?"

Owen struggles to tell EJ what is going on as Phillip continues to guzzle lemonade in the background. "Uh... sir... The flower you ordered may not be available. I'll have to call you back." He gets off the phone and banters with Phillip.

Nicole tells EJ Baker left town. Suddenly, she notices Stefano's painting is down and the back is cut off, "Who did that?"

EJ mumbles, "I did."

Stefano vegetates and moans. Victor tells him EJ hasn't called yet, so maybe he doesn't care as much as Stefano thought he did. Stefano struggles. Victor goads, "You're getting weaker, Stefano."

Max wants to know if Melanie is involved with either the Kiriakis or the DiMera families.

Melanie evades, "Define involved." She tells him about giving Phillip mouth to mouth. Max commends her for saving Phillip's life, but says he wants to know about the fuels project. He tells her to steer clear of both of the evil families.

Melanie sees an opportunity for a zinger, "You should tell that to your ex-girlfriend."

"That's no longer any of my business," says Max.

Phillip has now consumed enough lemonade that he'd have citric acid poisoning even if it weren't spiked. He gets woozy. Owen watches and frets like a little school kid.

EJ tells Nicole there was information hidden inside the picture. He says it contained valuable resources to help fight the Kiriakis family. Nicole thinks he should sign the contract get Stefano aback and go after the DiMeras later. "That's... a possibility," says EJ. He moves in and smooches, "You're a DiMera now. Victor will get nothing."

Nicole is confused, "I thought you said..."

EJ turns nasty, "It's gonna be a cold day in hell before that man touches any of my father's estate." Elsewhere, Satan puts on a jacket and turns up the heat. EJ says he has a plan to get his father back, "When he dies, I'm sure Victor will be willing to release the body."

Owen rakes. He looks around to make sure no one is there, then takes out his cell phone and calls EJ. He tells him there is a problem and starts to give EJ the whole story. EJ stops him, "I don't want to know details. Just call me when the job is done." Owen hangs up and wishes he had just said no when EJ asked him to do this.

Stephanie helps Phillip. She sits him in a chair and he goes out cold. Stephanie falls apart, "Phillip, wake up... OMG!"

Melanie is at the nurses' station. She signs out and one of the nurses gets on her case about leaving early. I guess she's leaving early to make up for getting in late. The nurse asks Melanie to deliver flowers to the kiddies on her way out. Melanie takes the arrangement and walks out.

Stephanie screams for help. Phillip insists he's fine. He gets up, staggers over and pours coffee. They sit on the chaise.

Victor comes into the pub and walks over to Bo and Hope's table, "I've been summoned, so here I am."

Clueless Commish turns to Hope, "So this is who you called?" They share some small talk about Phillip and then Bo decides to play cop. He lectures Victor about the law. Victor is amused at Bo's attempt to act like he knows something about police work. Hope tries to keep them from bickering but they keep it up. Victor insists what he is doing will save lives. That does it. Victor has done a lot of dastardly things but saving lives is where Bo draws the line. He stands up, "Victor, you're coming down to the station."

Nicole wonders how EJ knew to look behind the portrait. "I didn't," says EJ, "But I remembered something father told me... he said to think like a DiMera, which means to do something completely irrational like ripping the back off of a painting for no good reason."

Stefano sits up and huffs.

EJ thanks Nicole for saying she has faith in him. Nicole assures him he will win and they will get Stefano back. She zones in on his hand, "You're wearing Stefano's ring. Why?"

"I am his heir," says EJ, "I will do everything I can to protect the family."

Stephanie continues to worry. Phillip continues to insist he's OK.

Hope drags Bo off, "You don't have anything to charge Victor with."

"Oh," says supercop, "I forgot that little detail."

Hope says, "You're the only one who's going to lose here."

Bo says, "I'll take my chances." Bo gets a call and leaves.

Hope goes over to Victor and tries to smooth things over, "You're making Bo's life hell. That's my job. Let Bo handle things."

"That's your job, too," says Victor, "Just trust me. Everything is going to work out."

We pan in on Stefano.


Melanie arrives at the Kiriakis mansion, "Your guards are scary. One of them had his hands on me so long I thought he was going to ask me out on a date." Generous Melanie hands Phillip the flowers she was supposed to take to the kiddies. She gives Stephanie a look, "I see you have your own private duty nurse."

"Not just that," says Phillip, "She's my fiancée."

They take time to stop and clean up the mess after Melanie has a cow.

"You're supposed to say congratulations," says Phillip.

Max brings Ciara down and announces the big emergency – they couldn't find Tommy Bear. Victor says goodbye and stares at Bo as he leaves. Bo comes back to the table, smooches Ciara and Hope tells him about the Tommy Bear emergency. Bo remembers his vision and says he might know where they can find Tommy Bear.

Melanie stutters around. Stephanie goes for coffee and Melanie decides to go with her. Phillip tries to wake up. He staggers and falls onto the chaise.

Inside, Stephanie says, "I thought we were starting to be friends."

"Friends tell each other the truth," says Melanie, "That's a pretty hot outfit you're wearing. I'll bet Phillip bought it. Don't worry, my thing for Phillip is over. Y'know, you're supposed to offer congratulations to the guy, but best wishes to the girl, because she doesn't know what she is getting into. Phillip is a Kiriakis and you're a good girl... well one out of two ain't bad. Phillip won't change."

Nicole says she wondered if EJ was cut out to be the head of the family without Stefano, but now knows she was wrong and is behind him every step of the way. They proceed to use the rumpus room for rumpusing.

Victor checks Stefano's pulse. Apparently he gets nothing. He lifts the sheet and starts to cover Stefano's face, but Stefano stops him, "I'm not dead yet."

"Good," says Victor, "I'm not done with you yet."

Max serves. Bo asks if Ciara left Tommy Bear outside. Hope doesn't thing she was outside. She suspects Bo had another vision. Bo says yes, but never knows when they are true or what they mean. SuperMax goes up to look for Tommy Bear.

Victor sits at Stefano's bedside, "Your illustrious son is running out of time, Stefano. Maybe he should be reminded about how much he has to lose."

Nicole and EJ wrap things up and EJ gets a call. Stefano struggles to talk, "Elvis... Victor tells me you haven't responded to his ultimatum." EJ promises to get him home safely. Stefano says he trusts EJ with his life.

Owen comes back for his tools. He asks if Phillip is OK. Phillip says he just needs some rest. Owen helps him walk off.

Max the hero comes back with Tommy Bear. Hope thinks this is one of Bo's visions that won't come true.

EJ assures Stefano he will survive. Victor is on the phone, "Insulin is running low, EJ. So is your time. I'll be in touch."

"So will I," mumbles EJ.

Carlo takes over for Owen.

Melanie says she saw the plane tickets Stephanie threw away. She says she'd love to live at the DiMera mansion but thinks it would be scary with all the guards, "These guys never quit. Do you think you can have a good marriage living like that?"

Carlo drags Phillip in. Phillip tells Carlo to show Melanie out. Melanie insists she can find her own way out and she takes a hike.

Phillip snorts, "Dumb twit. I don't need her right now."

Stephanie asks, "Are you OK? Your eyes are crazy looking."

They go back onto the terrace. Phillip's dizzy spells continue. Speaking of dizzy, Phillip wonders what the two girls were talking about. Before Stephanie can answer, Henderson arrives and gives Stephanie a bracelet, thinking she dropped it. Stephanie says it's Melanie's. Phillip takes it and puts it in an ash tray, "That's where it belongs." He thinks he should go up and get some sleep. He leaves Stephanie to admire her teeny weeny negligee all by herself.

Victor tells Stefano this could be his last night on earth unless EJ comes through. Stefano says he believes in his son.

Nicole reads to Sydney as EJ comes back in. EJ says he is glad they have reached an understanding about his business.

Owen startles Stephanie. Now she's not the only one admiring her teeny weeny negligee. "I thought you had gone home," says Stefano.

"I have some loose ends I haven't tied up yet," says Owen.

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Anonymous Leslie said...

Even Melanie realizes they are spreading it on a little thick, "I'm gonna buy a sign and hang it in my room, "Thou shalt not whine."She needs to make copies of that sign and hand them out to Stephanie and Chloe.

He gets off the phone and banters with Phillip.Phillip has set up a romantic evening with Stephanie, and he’s bantering with the gardener. Give me a break!

"But I remembered something father told me... he said to think like a DiMera, which means to do something completely irrational like ripping the back off of a painting for no good reason."Isn’t that the truth. It was like EJ had a Vulcan mind meld with the painting, and it regurgitated information at him. Prevuze is correct. Ipecac Syrup and DOOL were separated at birth!

They proceed to use the rumpus room for rumpusing.The security camera catches everything. Using the video, Mary sets up an Internet smut site, and EJ and Nicole’s romping gets more hits than Pamela with Tommy Lee or Brett Michaels or whomever. Mary is ecstatic that Nicole is a professional romper because Mary is now a rich woman. She then goes on to write a tell all book about horny employers who can’t keep it in the bedroom.

OMG – This certainly sounds like must snooze TV. The silliness that has been packed into this episode is absolutely astounding. The whole Stephanie/Phillip/Melanie/Owen mess is pure craziness, and EJ is so concerned about the safety of his father that he can’t stop himself from having indiscreet sex with Nicole. Apparently, the Kiriakis and DiMera clans can't worry themselves about what the servants think nor do the DOOL writers care about the viewers’ reaction to this tripe. Once again, Prevuze takes one on the chin for the faithful.

5:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who is OMB?

6:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMB is old man brady-- grandpa shawn

6:55 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Melanie realizes they are spreading it on a little thick, "I'm gonna buy a sign and hang it in my room, "Thou shalt not whine."

Leslie, I wouldn’t just give signs to Stephanie & Chloe, I’d love to round everyone in Salem up and have that tattooed on their foreheads.

Victor is amused at Bo's attempt to act like he knows something about police work.

As is the audience. This should be a good scene. lol

He leaves Stephanie to admire her teeny weeny negligee all by herself.

OMG! Do you mean she is STILL prancing around in that?

Loved the separated at birth picture and Stefano’s vision.

I just realized that we are almost half-way through sweeps month. If this is the "excitement" they are dishing up for sweeps, I don't even want to think about the tripe we'll have to suffer through in June. Thank goodness Prevuze will be there to suffer through it for us!

8:14 AM  
Anonymous Stan the Man said...

I'm having a cow right along with Melanie. How contrived is this marriage proposal?

Ipecac and DAYS, you don't need one if you have the other.

8:38 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Max/Ciara/Ho/Dope/Tommy Bear. It just doesn't get more exciting than that does it?

If only Victor would walk in right now. I can just hear him telling that stupid Stephanie to go upstairs and get dressed. Not only Owen is getting an eyeful but poor Henderson, too. HAHAHA

And even tho we read it in Prevuze yesterday I didn't get the full absurdity of EJ ripping the back off of Stef's portrait until I saw it myself. I've left instructions with my family to save them the trouble in case of my demise I have not hidden anything behind the linings of my pictures.

I'm still laughing over Stefano's nightmare of Hell, Phillip's citric poisoning and "Max has to keep the family tradition going, "Until I go off to med school, then I really don't give a flying leap." Or until his contract runs out.

Thank you, Prevuze for taking one on the chin for us again! :D

9:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, the resemblance between EJ and Owen is remarkable. It's gotta be more than just a coincidence of how much EJ and Owen favor huh? And we all know Stefano got around with a lot of women some thirty years ago. Owen could also be another son of EJ's Mother and some other man. Owen seems to be very loyal to Stefano.

10:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Even with all that long hair, Owen is really a good looking hunk so they might just decide to keep him on DOOL for eye candy. Owen and EJ definitely favor imo.

4:35 PM  

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