Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Here's To Cheap Women

Stephanie comes into the pub and Caroline asks how her internship is going. Stephanie rattles through all the menial tasks she has been doing there, "The highlight of my day was walking into the men's restroom." She asks about Max as he walks out. Max tells her things are too busy for him to take a break.

John smirks as Paul Hollingsworth comes in. Paul stomps up to John's table. John smiles, "It's kind of a dive... I know. But I'm told the four alarm chili brings tears to your eyes."

Paul threatens, "I'm the one who will bring tears to your eyes if you don't get me out of this damn legal mess."

Phillip tells Maggie Nicole is back in town. "Victor had better cover his assets," says Maggie, as her gossip radar goes up and she makes a note to watch what goes on closely. It's been a while since Maggie got hold of some really juicy stuff to spread around.

A call from Chloe interrupts. She tells him the agents are there and asks him to come home right away. Phillip tells her to stay calm. He will notify his lawyer and be there. He turns to Maggie, "Tell Nicole I had to leave."

Nicole and Sami snipe at each other. "ZIP IT," says Nicole.

EJ jumps to Sami's defense, "You won't get very far with me by telling my wife to zip it. In answer to your question, you might have a case with Victor."

Nicole says, "You take me on as a client and get me the settlement I want and I will cut you in on a very nice percentage."

"NO," says Sami, "He wouldn't represent a gold digging witch like you."

Stephanie decides to have some apple pie and boy talk with Caroline. Stephanie is worried about Max lately. She thinks ever since OMB died he has shut her out. "It's been a rough couple of months for all of us," says Caroline, "especially OMB." Caroline agrees to try to talk some sense into Max, "I couldn't talk sense into OMB all those years we were together, but I'll give it a shot with Max. I think it would be good for him to have some time off."

John tells Paul to relax and trust him. He suggests tequila. Hollingsworth isn't in the mood. John tells him he has something in mind. Marlena interrupts.

Nicole mocks, "Witch? Is that all you can come up with?"

"Why don't you go choke on something," asks Sami.

Nicole is delighted she could bait Sami, "Now there is the Sami we all know and love." Nicole helps herself to the wine at their table and thinks it's terrible. She tells EJ if he helps her, he will never have to order this cheap stuff again.

Mikey comes up and asks to talk to EJ. He puts a friendly arm on EJ's shoulder and advises him not to take Nicole's case, "I wouldn't do it."

"But I think we can win this," says EJ.

"That's what I mean," says Mickey, "I never take a case I can win."

Alone together, Sami toasts Nicole, "Here's to cheap women and everything that comes with them."

Nicole and Sami banter. Nicole thinks Sami should be grateful she hired EJ. Sami thinks Nicole will need the Jaws of Life to get out of the dress she is wearing. "I'll have Maggie help me," says Nicole, "If the Jaws of Life aren't available, you can always use the jaws of death."

Mickey tells EJ Nicole is a tyrant. EJ thinks she is OK. He also thinks he can deal with Nicole after a lifetime of dealing with Stefano. He says he isn't in any position to turn down work anymore.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," says the Mickster, "Start winning cases and it's all downhill from there."

Nicole wanders and yells, "Who do you have to sleep with to get another vodka martini? Half the guys in the room run up to her with vodka martinis.

Sami is on the phone, "I can't believe Johnny went right to sleep. He usually is up crying at this time."

Nicole comes back to the table and overhears, "I'd cry too, if you were my mother. You know... the twins having different fathers is freakish. How does that work, anyway? You really must have been slutting around."

Sami's ready for a fight, "I've had enough!" EJ grabs her as she stands up and restrains her. Once Sami calms down, EJ goes off with Nicole to have a chat."

"Your wife needs a choke chain," says Nicole.

"Stop insulting my wife," says EJ, "Cut the snarky comments." He looks into the camera, "That doesn't apply to you, Prevuze."

Nicole asks, "Does that mean you've considered my offer?"

"Yes."

John tells Paul he will be in touch. Paul leaves. Marlena tells John she has been reading about Paul's misadventures. John thinks a lecture is coming. Marlena says she isn't going to lecture. She thinks he's a big boy and can do whatever he wants. Marlena isn't giving up, but thinks she should be practical if there is nothing between them.

John gets that look in his eye, "I definitely feel something. Let's start over." He sticks out his hand, "Hello there. I'm John."

"I don't want to start over," says Marlena, "I want the man I fell in love with. I want my old John back."

Max stoops and works behind the bar. Caroline tells him this can wait, "I can get someone else to look at the carbonator."

"I can do it," insists Max, "I'm used to fixing things. Carbonator... carburetor... what's the difference?"

"If you don't know," says Caroline, "it's probably a good thing you quit racing." She tells him she wants to talk. Max protests. You don't mess with Caroline. She hauls him up and shoves him onto a stool, "SIT!" Max sits. Caroline isn't messing around, "STAY!" Max obediently waits for his Milkbone. Caroline asks him how many hours he's been working. He thinks Stephanie put her up to this. She encourages him to take a little time off and suggests he go talk to Stephanie.

Marlena doesn't want John to call him Doc. He wants her to give the new John half a chance.

Chloe refuses to go with the goons from the consulate. She's not going anywhere until her lawyer gets there. They give her a choice, "Ve can do zis zee eazy vay or zee hardt vay. Ve can get zee Zalem PD involved, you know."

"I'm guessing that's the easy way," says Chloe.

Nicole wants to get started. EJ says he hasn't accepted yet. Nicole tells him, "Whatever Nicole wants, Nicole gets."

"What happens if she doesn't," asks EJ, "You'd try to have me eliminated like you did Victor?"

"Mickey has been polluting your mind with lies," says Nicole.

"My mind was polluted before I ever met Mickey," insists EJ.

Nicole swears she wouldn't hurt anyone and thinks they should take the meeting elsewhere. Mickey, Maggie and Sami stand there and soak it in. Maggie takes copious notes. Nicole asks, "Are you married to Sami because you lost a bet?"

Sami turns to Mickey, "How long does it take to say no to someone? He is telling her no, isn't he?"

"I did my best," says Mickey. Mickey has a track record of doing his best and losing like the '67 Mets.

Nicole has some Sami lowlights for EJ, "She is the reason Lucas is a raging drunk. She accused him of hitting Will. And where is Will? In Europe because he can't stand his mother."

Sami overhears and steps up, "Why don't you tell him some other things about me... like the time I threw a drink in your face."

SPLAT! Nicole stands there dripping wet, "You are so dead." She goes for a napkin as EJ and Sami argue about whether he should take the case.

Sami tells him Nicole dated Eric and then dumped him for Lucas, "Your former partner Kate paid her $5 Million to marry Lucas."

"Let's see," says EJ, "Kate lost $5 Million, and Nicole got $5 Million along with Lucas. Kate definitely got the better end of that deal."

EJ thinks Eric must have been devastated. Sami says, "Nicole screws up people's lives and I don't want you to get hurt." She hesitates, "For Johnny's sake, that is." EJ tells her he's accepting Nicole's offer.

Nicole walks up to their table, "It's about time."

Marlena starts to huff off, but John asks for just five minutes. He gives her a near-squint.

"What are you looking at," asks Marlena.

"What would happen," asks John, "if you took me on as a project instead of a patient? Why don't you try to turn me into who you want me to be? Ponder that for a minute." John leaves. Marlena ponders.

Max joins Stephanie and apologizes for what happened earlier. He thinks he can deal with his loss on his own. Stephanie thinks she can help, "You need to get out and do things." She reminds him he convinced her to move on after the 'Ford thing.' She thinks he needs to move on, too. Max decides he has to do something and leaves.

Marlena joins Stephanie. Stephanie says she would have come over and said hi, but Marlena and John looked like they are trying to work things out.

Max tells Caroline he's going to take some time off. Caroline is OK with that. Max goes back to tell Stephanie the good news.

Phillip comes in and asks the agents what they are doing. He says his attorney is on the way. The agents grab Chloe and haul her off. As they drag her out, Phillip tells her, "Don't say a word!"

"I'm not very good at keeping my mouth shut," says Chloe.

EJ drags Sami off. "Don't take Nicole's bait."

"I don't want you to work with her," says Sami, "We are married!"

"Coulda fooled me," says EJ, "Someone in this marriage has to bring in some money. We have children living in our house. Johnny and Ali, too."

"Don't make this about Ali and Johnny," says Sami. Nicole swills her drink and eavesdrops.

EJ says, "I know you dislike her..."

Sami interrupts, "I dislike tomatoes. I despise her." EJ says he thinks maybe Nicole has changed. "If she has changed," says Sami, "it is for the worse."

EJ asks, "How many second chances have you been given? It's time you gave her one." He says he'll try it and if it doesn't work out he will find her another attorney, "Do we have a deal?"

"No deal, EJ," snorts Sami, "it's either her or me."

EJ consults the Guy Manual on this one, "Choosing Women: Take a woman who might over a woman who won't every time. Remember... CENSORED – do not click on this link."

Stephanie tells Marlena she wishes she could help Max. Marlena thinks the two of them can work it out. Max comes up and Marlena leaves. Max tells Stephanie he's taking some time off. Hugs. "This is the best thing you could have done," says Stephanie.

Marlena walks by Caroline on her way back to her table, "Nice job."

"Thanks," says Caroline, "I knew I could fix that carbonator."

John comes back and asks if Marlena has had time to think about his proposition. She asks if John minds being a project, "Weren't you Stefano's project?"

"Yes," says John, "but he didn't look half as good in a dress. Seeing Stefano in a dress was the main reason I lost my mind."

Nicole comes up and apologizes to Sami. Sami is indignant, "Are you smoking something?" Nicole says she's willing to forget if Sami is. EJ thinks that's a good idea. Sami thinks it's a dirty little trick.

Nicole gives up, "I'll just go find another attorney who I don't have to beg to take a wad-o-cash." Nicole turns and stomps off. EJ nearly destroys everything in his path trying to catch up to her.

Max and Stephanie stand outside the pub. Max wonders how to spend his night of freedom. Stephanie suggests talking. Max wonders if she doesn't want to go have some fun. So now that Max has turned around, Stephanie is the one who is in a funk. Max wonders why she just wants to talk. "No one has heard from my dad for a long time," says Stephanie.

"Sounds like a good reason to go out and celebrate to me," says Max.

John tosses random compliments at Marlena. Giddy schoolgirl Marlena takes the bait, hook, line and sinker.

EJ catches Nicole and tells her he will take the case. She says she doesn't want his personal life to interfere and welcomes him aboard. Sami huffs off. EJ tells Nicole he knows what she is doing. If she does anything to jeopardize his relationship with Sami she will be looking for a new attorney. He leaves.

Nicole smiles, "I guess we start tomorrow. Yay!"

Mickey turns to Maggie, "This isn't going to end well is it?"

"No," says Maggie, "Nothing ends well when your firm is involved."

Phillip is on the phone with his attorney. He says he will be there in ten minutes. He hangs up and sits down to think things over, "Who in the hell would..." He remembers Chloe talking to him as Nicole listened, "Damn it, Nicole!"


Previews
========

You can watch the previews later today on our PREVUZE II website.

17 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

Nicole says, "You take me on as a client and get me the settlement I want and I will cut you in on a very nice percentage."

Don’t attorney fees end up being a third of the settlement? She wants to give EJ more? What would straight shooting Mickey say about that?

Sami thinks Nicole will need the Jaws of Life to get out of the dress she is wearing. "I'll have Maggie help me," says Nicole, "If the Jaws of Life aren't available, you can always use the jaws of death."

That’s a good one Prevuze. Methinks that Nicole’s cattiness is going to bring out the very best in Prevuze.

Nicole wanders and yells, "Who do you have to sleep with to get another vodka martini? Half the guys in the room run up to her with vodka martinis.

This is exactly what I’m talking about!!

"Stop insulting my wife," says EJ, "Cut the snarky comments." He looks into the camera, "That doesn't apply to you, Prevuze."

Even EJ knows Prevuze is a snarkellectual. OK, ok, I’ll stop quoting and leave good stuff for my fellow Prevuites.

This was truly a 127 star Prevuze!!!! The censored link earned at least 112 of those stars!!! Talk about a genuine liquid spitter!!! By the way, Daze sounds like a real hoot today.

5:43 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

snarkellectual

Well, speaking of liquid spitters...

5:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like a good episode with all the back and forth between Sami and Nicole. Too bad I have to miss it cause of classes. Drat those 1pm classes!!

6:06 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

OMG, so many missed prevuizms, so little time!!!

Nicole is delighted she could bait Sami, "Now there is the Sami we all know and love.
Or love to hate, either way.


Alone together, Sami toasts Nicole, "Here's to cheap women and everything that comes with them."
"Hey! I'm EASY, not CHEAP! There's a BIG difference" Nichole says


Nicole comes back to the table and overhears, "I'd cry too, if you were my mother. You know... the twins having different fathers is freakish. How does that work, anyway? You really must have been slutting around."
Sami smiles "Well they do say it takes one to know one. And coming from the High Priestess of Sleaze that really means a lot."


Marlena starts to huff off, but John asks for just five minutes. He gives her a near-squint.
The DOOL audience chants: SQUINT SQUINT SQUINT!!

EJ asks, "How many second chances have you been given? It's time you gave her one." He says he'll try it and if it doesn't work out he will find her another attorney, "Do we have a deal?"

"No deal, EJ," snorts Sami, "it's either her or me."

Howie Mandel walks in and hands the two of them a court order to stop using his trademark catch phrase.

Sami is indignant, "Are you smoking something?"
The DOOL audience wishes they had some to make the show more interesting

New blog today!
Read
Enjoy
Comment
These Are The Daze Of Our Lives

7:03 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

OMG, so many missed prevuizms, so little time!!!

All great. LOL!

7:21 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Two fabulous separated at birth pictures, another funny sailboat picture AND a moving pic. I feel so lucky to actually get to read Prevuze this morning!

Bad, BAD censored link!! [snicker, snicker, snicker]

And while Deb picked up some of the prevuism-slack, there are lots of gems to go around:

Mikey comes up and asks to talk to EJ. He puts a friendly arm on EJ's shoulder and advises him not to take Nicole's case, "I wouldn't do it."
"But I think we can win this," says EJ.
"That's what I mean," says Mickey, "I never take a case I can win."

"Don't say I didn't warn you," says the Mickster, "Start winning cases and it's all downhill from there."


Poor Mickster. His reputation as the losingest lawyer in soap history is in jeapordy.

And last, but certainly not least, They give her a choice, "Ve can do zis zee eazy vay or zee hardt vay. Ve can get zee Zalem PD involved, you know."

"I'm guessing that's the easy way," says Chloe.


The Salem PD gets a zinger too.

The sun is out! Prevuze was great! And the show actually looks watchable tomorrow. Hooray!

7:53 AM  
Anonymous em said...

Claire considering her escape on the boat . . . LOL!!!

8:10 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Oh yeah, Claire on the boat...so funny! And the censored link, Prevuze always has something up her sleeve! Can't wait for more Nicole/Sami Prevuisms!

9:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG, this episode sounds so good!!! I am so excited about the story lines right now, for the first time in a long time. I usually do not care for Marlena and John, but to me the whole dynamic between them has really gotten interesting. And the Nicole/Sami/EJ stuft - great! I can totally see Nicole and EJ working together and maybe hooking up, with Sami finding out and getting jealous, then realizing she loves EJ....yeah!! Anyway, thanks Prevuze, and love the Censored link!

9:41 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Any time there's a moving picture my day is made! :D

But the security police at work won't let me view the censored link so I'll have to check it out at home. Probably just as well, it would be another spattertunity all over my keyboard.

My favorite Prevuism: "I can do it," insists Max, "I'm used to fixing things. Carbonator... carburetor... what's the difference?"

"If you don't know," says Caroline, "it's probably a good thing you quit racing."
HAHAHAHA

Great Prevuze, I can relax now that I finally was able to read it!

10:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This prevuze was classic I loved the whole thing and will watch this epi! Thank you so much for the moving picture lmao, I can't tell you how happy I am to have the REAL Sami Back! I look forward to seeing this play out and the many Classic prevuisms it's sure to inspire! I'm lovin green-eyed Sami the colour looks good on her!

11:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This new John is a total ass, and Marlena is falling for his manipulative crap hook line and sinker. Any respect I used to have for the character id gone now, which is sad seeing as hos I was a huge John and Marlena fan until not long ago. And I still despise Ejami. I will never accept the pairing of rapist and victim, no0 matter how much tptb try to shove them down my throat.

1:29 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

the security police at work won't let me view the censored link

Too bad you don't work for the SPD or Salem Hospital. They'd run the censored link out to you on a silver platter.

2:02 PM  
Blogger Jenifer said...

And the Nicole/Sami/EJ stuft - great! I can totally see Nicole and EJ working together and maybe hooking up, with Sami finding out and getting jealous, then realizing she loves EJ....yeah!!

I COULD NOT agree w/ you more!! I love to see the green envy of Sami.. finally a decent story line. I was concerned that bringing back Nicole was going to be a bad idea, but this is a nice twist. YUP YUP... Sami - you're in for a trip down "realization" lane.

In comment of "Anonymous" the pairing of a rapist and victim. I know this can be debated and I might be asking for some hate mail, but Sami has ALWAYS been attracted to EJ. From day one. While under duress she accepted his proposition to save Lucas. Any woman with a pulse who felt she'd been raped, would not come 100 yards near her attacker. That's why I strongly feel Sami wasn't 100% opposed. Okay... let the hate mail proceed....

This is a soap opera but hey, go for it!

-jen

2:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Any woman with a pulse who felt she'd been raped, would not come 100 yards near her attacker."

Jen - you couldn't have said it better. If a woman truly felt as if she was raped, she would not have the ability to even see her rapist day to day, much less have the kind of relationship Sami does with EJ. And that's a fact.

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Any woman with a pulse who felt she'd been raped, would not come 100 yards near her attacker.

I couldn’t agree with you more Jen. Anything in this soap opera that mimics reality is purely a coincidence.

3:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Got to see some of the Marlena/Jawn scenes at lunch today. I always love anything with the new Jawn. (However, I could have zapped the flashback scenes in the therapy session. Unless you want to be reminded how sappy the old John was.)

Actually, it would be a hoot if Doc finally fell in love with Jawn and if/when he got his memory back she couldn't stand the old, wimpy, John. HAHAHA

KOTU

4:07 PM  

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