If The Earth Doesn't Move, You Move On
Well, folks, if you don't have at least a 48" TV, you won't be able to see the full smile on Nick's face. He thinks it was pretty amazing. Oddly, he's ready to go back upstairs. He asks Chelsea if she wants to go up with him. Deflowered Chelsea blushes and smiles her little brat-smile. Nick repeats his request.
Billie and Kate sit in the pub and talk. Kate thinks Billie's biggest problem is selling herself short. Billie is proud her security system was her own doing. Kate's career, on the other hand, is going down the toilet. She's locked out of her office and her bank account is frozen. They turn their attention to Sami. Billie can't believe Sami didn't press charges. Kate says the rape is Sami's story but the only thing they have is her word, and they know Sami is a liar.
Billie insists Sami wouldn't lie about this, and they both need to support Lucas. Speaking of Lucas, Motormouth himself walks in. He asks if they are talking about him. Since Lucas is the center of the universe, what else could they be talking about?
Sami is in for the amnio. Dr. Jacobs explains the risks. Sami signs the consent form. Dr. Jacobs leaves. Marlena tells Sami she doesn't have to do this. Sami insists she does, "If I don't prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that EJ is not the father, I'm afraid I'm gonna lose Lucas.
Marlena asks, "What are you saying?"
Sami says, "Basically, how do I prove EJ is the father so I can dump this possessive, defensive gasbag I'm stuck with?"
Marlena thinks Sami is underestimating Lucas. Impossible. Sami wouldn't blame him if he wanted to leave her, "What kind of man would want to raise another man's child."
"Willingly or unwillingly, half the guys in Salem do it," says Marlena, "Including John." She predicts Lucas will accept it. Sami falls apart. That's what she used to think but Lucas has changed. Sami is afraid he will hate the baby because it will remind him of what EJ did to her.
Lucas wants to talk to Billie – alone. Kate protests but leaves, "I see, the banishment continues. I'll go powder my nose."
Billie is glad she got out of business with EJ before she got in the same kind of hot water as her mom. Kate listens as Lucas tells Billie Sami is getting the amnio. Billie tells him it's natural for him to be concerned. Lucas says, "There's nothing natural about that SOB raping my wife, all right? And now I have to raise his baby – no thank you."
The brat says she didn't mean to snap at Nick, "It's time to rock and roll." Nick buys into that immediately. He's ready to do some rockin' and rollin' with her. Chelsea says she meant it's time to shower and get to work. Nick suggests showering together. Chelsea makes excuses. Just because they had sex doesn't mean they have to grope each other all the time, "I know this wasn't your first time."
"Are you mad at me," asks Nick, "I didn't disappoint you, did I?"
"No," lies Chelsea, "We're golden."
Nick babbles, "So, like, we're a couple now. If anyone asks, you gotta tell them you're taken."
Chelsea yells, "Is that why you had sex with me? To mark your territory and show Jett I'm taken? I thought you were better than that. So you think I still have a thing for Jett?"
"No," says Nick, "I think he has a thing for you."
Nick says he trusts her. He's happy for her and her new job. By the time she gets back he'll have the apartment ready. He wants to make her happy. She smooches him and tells him they are all right. Nick goes upstairs and Chelsea picks up the phone, "I need you right away I have a big problem."
Lucas doesn't blame Sami. Billie says she believes Sami was raped. Lucas says his problem is with himself. He promised he would welcome the baby, but can't do that if it's EJ's. He says Sami doesn't seem to care either way who the father is. Lucas can't raise EJ's baby as his own. Kate soaks it in.
Sami worries because of Celeste's prediction. Marlena reminds her EJ raped her, "And I didn't report it," says Sami, "And if the baby is his, we will keep this war up." Marlena suggests a meeting between the two families. Sami doesn't think that will work. Stefano has made it clear the price for peace between the two families is her marrying EJ. Marlena thinks Stefano is vile, but he loves his family and wants EJ to be happy. Sami refuses to be a DiMera harem girl.
"You are the woman EJ loves," says Marlena.
"A man does not rape a woman he loves," says Sami, "I hope before he dies someone harts him like he hurt me."
Nick stands at the door and tells Chelsea he misses her already. He wishes her a good flight. She promises to call. Smooches. "I love you," says Nick.
The brat says nothing, but just nods. She walks back inside. Stephanie stands there munching a bagel, carb-loading for the flight. Chelsea makes the big announcement, "Nick and I spent the night together."
"I know," says Stephanie, "Jeremy told me. He saw the two of you going at it hot and heavy here on the couch."
Chelsea has a conniption, "He what? He's probably posting pictures on MySpace."
Stephanie wants details, "Did Nick rock you down to your soul?"
"Not exactly," says Chelsea, "I blinked and it was over. He was really sweet and gentle but I didn't feel anything. I think there is something wrong with me."
"You aren't alone there," says Stephanie.
Billie says Sami did what she had to do to save Lucas' life, "DNA doesn't mean a damn. All the baby needs is your love." Lucas wonders what he is going to do on Christmas, Thanksgiving or weekends when EJ shows up. He thinks Tony, Stefano and EJ will corrupt the kid and turn it against him. He doesn't know if he can do it. Billie asks if he has discussed this with Sami.
"Oh, heck no," says Lucas, "That would be the intelligent thing to do so I can't do that. What do I say – raising EJ's kid wasn't in your wedding vows, so I can't do it? I don't know what I am going to do."
Marlena thinks punishing EJ wouldn't solve anything. Right now Marlena just wants to get her hands on him, "But we don't do that."
Sami says she had the chance to kill him, but she couldn't, "I would be lost without Lucas, but if this baby is EJ's..."
"It's not," declares Marlena, "These test results are far too important to leave to chance."
Sami about faints, "Are you saying you would rig the test results?"
"That's exactly what I propose," says Marlena, "You say the word and your worries are over."
Sami is absolutely shocked. Marlena insists no one will know. Sami speaks from experience, "Someone always finds out. What if something happened to the baby and Lucas found out? This would cause too many sleepless nights. There is no way I am letting you do this." Marlena notes the old Sami would have jumped at the chance. Sami can't go through another lie like that. Dear, innocent Marlena just doesn't know what she was thinking when she suggested rigging the test results.
Sami goes sappy on us, "You were thinking you love me, just like I love you."
Billie thinks Lucas should talk this over with Sami. Kate eavesdrops. Nick walks in. He takes a bullhorn and announces, "HI EVERYONE! I GOT LAID LAST NIGHT! Hello Billie! Hello Lucas!" He looks directly behind them and says, "Hello, Mrs. Roberts!"
Lucas and Billie turn around and see Kate standing there. They let her have it with both barrels for listening to their conversation. Nick asks how Sami is doing and they give him a report. Lucas goes to call Marlena and check up on Sami. Nick says he will check up on her when he gets to the hospital. Billie is glad to hear he and Chelsea are doing well and he still has his job at the hospital, "I've been out of the loop ever since she moved in with Bo and Hope."
Nick extols Chelsea's virtue. Or lack of it. Kate joins in and asks how Nick is doing. He chirps, "Mrs. Roberts, I have never been better!"
"I lost my virginity last night," says Chelsea, "I wanted it to be special. Stephanie thinks Chelsea has seen too many chic flicks. She says sex is the one subject you can't flunk. Chelsea says, "I wasn't just looking for someone who wanted to grab ass."
"Don't knock it till you've tried it," says Stephanie.
Chelsea asks, "Is that how it is with you and Jeremy? Uh... Is it wrong to think about other things when you're doing it? I kept thinking about him doing my mom."
Stephanie's bagel comes back up, "EEEUUUUUUWWW..." Chelsea thought she was over that. Chelsea says she knows Nick wanted her. Stephanie asks, "What do you want?
Chelsea says, "I don't know, and that's why I called you."
Stephanie asks, "Did you sleep with him because you were into it or did you think you owed him a freebie?"
"Does Nick make you feel like you want your hands in his pants 24-7," asks Stephanie, "Maybe it will happen, but not with Nick."
Chelsea says she just can't break his heart. Stephanie counsels her to go for a clean break, "You can't sleep with him and fake it. That's not love. It's pity."
Billie hopes Chelsea realizes how lucky she is. As he leaves, Nick tells Billie realizes how lucky he is, by God.
Billie tells Kate about the hairbrush planting and Nick stealing it, "Roman let them walk."
Kate perks up, "Roman was involved?"
Billie swears Kate to silence. Kate swears she won't tell anyone. Billie senses insincerity, "I mean it, Mom, not a word to anyone." Crafty Kate keeps her mouth shut. Lucas comes over to their table and announces the amnio is about to start.
"Don't you think you should get over there," asks Kate.
Lucas snorts, "Don't tell me what to do."
Kate removes the dagger from her heart, "OK. Fine. Give my regards to Sami." Lucas heads out the door. Kate huffs.
Nick walks into Sami's room with flowers. He says the flowers are from Chelsea and him. Sami asks how things are with them. Nick grins from ear to ear, "BETTER THAN EVER!" Sami hopes things stay that way. Nick says he will check up on her later. She tells him to make sure the tests results aren't messed up.
Dr. Jacobs brings in Jane Yamomoto to do the tests.
Kate bumps into Nick in the hall. He shows her where Sami's room is if she is there to see her. Kate says she's not there to see Sami, "I'm here to see you."
Chelsea says she doesn't pity Nick nor is she into mercy sex. Stephanie thinks she's not into sex at all, at least with Nick. Chelsea asks, "So if the sex wasn't hot between you and Jeremy, you'd dump him?"
"It's more like he'd dump me," says Stephanie, "Turn-ons come in surprise packages. You aren't in love with Nick. If the earth doesn't move, you move on. What about Jett? You look at him like you want to rip his clothes off with your teeth and jump his bones.
"You're sick," says Chelsea.
Stephanie says, "You want Jett Carver. You want him bad."
Chelsea smiles and thinks about the possibilities. Finally she says, "You need to run your dirty little mouth though the rinse cycle. And stop acting like a pole dancer looking for her next lap dance."
"Why," asks Stephanie, "Because I did the nasty before you did?"
"Listen to how you talk," says Chelsea, "There isn't anything nasty about sleeping with someone."
"There is if you do it right," says Stephanie, "With enough practice you'll forget about Nick."
Chelsea says Nick is the best thing in her life. Stephanie suggests a new life and a new guy.
"I'm not into one-nighters," says Chelsea.
"Why not make it last more than one night," asks Stephanie.
Chelsea says, "You are a slut!"
"I'd rather be that," says Stephanie, "Than imagine my mom... EEEUUUUUUWWW...
Chelsea says, "You make me sound like some shallow crotch grabber, which I am not. And why would I leave Nick for some guy who is in love with another woman?" She doesn't want to hear any more about Jett, decides inviting Stephanie over was a bad idea and ushers her to the door.
"I'll see you at work," says Stephanie. She giggles, "So will Jett!"
Kate tells Nick she's there because Lucas is worried about the test. He tells her Sami is in good hands. She thinks his work in the lab must be fascinating. Nick says, "Let's cut to the chase... what do you want?"
"I want the test results to prove EJ is the father, beyond a shadow of a doubt."
Lucas walks into Sami's room. Dr. Jacobs wrinkles her brow. She sees something on the monitor and can't believe she hasn't seen it before. Everybody in the room gasps in unison, "IS SOMETHING WRONG?"
"There is nothing wrong," says Dr. Jacobs, "With either one of your babies. Congratulations! It looks like you're having twins!"
Lucas searches for a barf bag.
Jerkemy tells Max, "All we need to do now is deliver the goods, split the take and party in Vegas."
Kate says, "I want you to do the smart thing." Nick says, "Make sure EJ Wells is the father no matter what the truth is."
Lucas says, "No, Sami, EJ wants you, all right? That idiot wants you for himself."
Stefano says, "You let me down. EJ says, "I let you down... How, father?" SLAP, "You lied to me and that is the one thing I will not tolerate!"
Belle, Shawn, Phillip and Claire get together for their own family meeting. Belle speaks her mind. The silence is deafening.