Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Tick Tock

Gabby works and hums. Shawn comes down and says Claire is better. He asks for a couple of coffees. She says yes and offers breakfast. Shawn refuses. She wonders where he will find something to eat, since her place is the only game in town. Shawn just wants coffee. Gabby knows he's proud, "But you look like hell." She says it's not a big deal to get some food. Shawn tells her she has done enough.
Gabby leaves and Belle comes down in a tizzy, "Claire's fever broke. Can you fix it? "

Sami, Lucas and Billie are waiting for Chelsea at Billie's place. They speculate about whether or not Chelsea could have done the dastardly deed. Billie points out Chelsea was upset, and when she gets upset she lashes out. Billie doesn't' know if she will ever see her again. Chelsea walks in. Staredown.

Patch paces in his cell. Mighty Joe Young brings Kayla in. Patch tells her he has nothing to say to her. For someone with nothing to say, he certainly does a good job of exercising his mouth. Kayla just wants to help prove EJ forced him to kidnap John. Patch don' wan' no stinkin' help.

Willow ransacks her room looking for the check. EJ comes in and Willow nukes at EJ for taking the check. EJ admits he did it but says setting fire to Bo and Hope's house was not part of the bargain. Willow claims the fire was an accident. EJ says, "Willow, I make it a rule not to do any kind of business with psychotic arsonists. I either avoid them or I eliminate them. What's it gonna be with you, eh?"

Willow claims she's not psychotic. She just has this thing for fire. She drags Hope's jewels out of her cabinet to show EJ she did her job. EJ says, "I'm not interested in that tasteless junk. You and I never met, got it? If the police start snooping around, you keep your mouth shut, sweetheart."

Willow tells him not to worry. They are in the clear, "I set up someone else to take the fall."

The brat rages. She knows Bo thinks she set the fire. Sami defends Bo. Lucas gets irritated that there are people talking and it's not him, so he piles on. Billie tells her they will fight this together.

"There is no us," says the brat, "I'm all alone. It's about time I got used to that."

Shawn and Belle celebrate Claire's fever breaking, "I've got a tough little girl," says Shawn. He bounces her around as Gabby brings coffee. She offers to get them food. Belle jumps on that, but the great provider tells Gabby she's done enough and they have to be going. Belle looks at him like he's lost his mind. No comment.

Patch and Kayla. On and on. Same-o, same-o. This is what we refer to as a "zapping opportunity."

Kayla will do whatever it takes to get their life back, including beating an obstinate dead horst into the ground. Patch tells her to forget about EJ Wells and forget about him. God knows the rest of us would like to. She accuses him of being a coward. Most cowards aren't this boring.

Speaking of boring... speaking of same-o... Billie and Chelsea keep it up. Let's put it this way. Make sure your remote has fresh batteries before you start watching this episode and make liberal use of the fast-forward button. Uncle Lucas steps in to set her straight. He assures her they are looking out for her. The brat breaks down and falls into Sami's arms.

Shawn reminds Gabby they are broke. She gives up on the hardheaded little idiot and goes to take care of a customer. Belle reminds him they are broke and hungry. Their raft is in splinters on the beach, because Shawn missed Duck's living room and hit a tree instead. She wonders where they will go. Brainiac will figure something out, "End of discussion."

No, Belle will decide when the discussion is over. She is staying there because that is what is best for their daughter. Now it's the end of the discussion.

EJ is impressed if Willow set someone else up to take the rap for the fire. Willow says he should pay her, "You owe me."

"What I owed you, and what I gave you, was a lesson," says EJ, "Never trust anyone." Willow figures out he never intended to pay her in the first place. "Oh," says EJ, "You catch on really fast, don't you? Let me give you some advice. Never, and I mean EVER, do anything other than cash in advance." He turns at the door as he leaves, "And never call me again." Willow slams the door into his back, since she doesn't have a knife handy.

Shawn can't stay there because Duck reminds him of Victor. Duck thinks Shawn is a bum. Belle says, "You've already proven yourself to me. That should count for something. Breakfast would count for a lot more."

Gabby tosses him a rope, "Tie me a sheepshank." The Eagle Scout works the rope and passes the test. The Sheepshank Redemption. She gives him a boat test, "You've got water in your bilge, what do you do?"

"Drill a hole in the bottom of the boat and let it drain out."

She wants to know if he could install a new manifold on a Mercuriser. He goes though the steps and asks if she has a new manifold to replace the old one. She has a used one, but needs to order the mounting kit from Guam. It will take a week or so to get there, so the next question is, how long are you willing to be here?"

Belle chimes in, "At least until after breakfast."

The brat doesn't want to stay long. Sami asks the brat if she's going to stay with Ho and Dope, and finish the job. The brat doesn't think so. Billie wonders where she will be staying.

"Anywhere but here," scowls Chelsea, "How does that work out for you? I would rather sleep on a park bench with a bunch of muggers around than stay with you."

Billie grabs her and screams, "You spoiled little brat!"

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME," screams the spoiled little brat.

Billie breaks down and apologizes, "If I could take it back I would. I would die for you, Chelsea. That's probably what you want me to do right now."

Chelsea says, "You're right."

Billie sobs, "Then hate me for being weak and human but don't accuse me of not caring."

Kayla tells Patch he's a real disappointment. He wonders if that is supposed to hurt his feelings. She thought time in here would bring out the old Steve – the fighter in him. Nope, just the talker. Kayla tries tough love. Maybe he wants her to believe he doesn't care, but what about their daughter?

"What about her," asks Patch. Kayla wonders how she will react when she finds out Steve threw everything away for the DiMeras. "She won't find out," snarls Steve, "You're not gonna tell her."

"Just watch me." Kayla says she knows Stephanie will be hurt, "Oh, I forgot, you don't care about anything like that."

"You're bluffing," says Steve.

"Wanna bet your life on it?"

Patch tells her to leave Stephanie out of this. Kayla can't do that. She has a right to know. Patch argues. He thinks she will quit her job and come back to Salem. Patch rages. Kayla tells him it's not her decision. He says he will never forgive her if she drags Stephanie into this.

Shawn wonders if Gabby is saying she wants him to work for her. Not only that, the Gabster offers free room and board. Shawn says if they are staying until the parts get there he has to do something. Gabby says he can cover for her. Shawn wonders if Duck might have something to say about that. Gabby says, "Duck doesn't do much around here except argue and drink beer."

Duck argues with her, "I heard that!" He chugs his beer.

Shawn says they will stay, but only if it's all right with Duck. Duck swigs. Shawn stares. Claire coos. Belle's stomach growls.

Lucas offers to have the brat stay with them. Sami says she would love to have her, "As long as it's OK with your mom."

"I don't care where she stays," says Billie. Whatever happened to, "...hate me for being weak and human but don't accuse me of not caring."

Billie tells the brat she has showed her nothing but love and forgiveness, "When everyone else turned their back on you I showed you love. And your boyfriend, too. I just want the same consideration."

"Can we go now," snorts the brat.

Sami and Chelsea leave. Billie cries. Lucas comforts. Billie thinks she's a failure. EJ knocks at the door. He asks if this is a bad time. "We're in the middle of something," says Lucas.

EJ comes in anyway. He heard about the fire, but he thinks this is a good opportunity to run in and sell Bo the security system. Billie asks, "You want me to give him the hard sell at a time like this?"

EJ asks, "Can you think of a better time?

Billie can't do it. Lucas reminds EJ Bo almost lost his wife and daughter. EJ thinks this is a perfect business opportunity. Billie tells him the authorities have questioned Chelsea about her involvement. EJ says he had no idea she was involved. Lucas insists she wasn't. He tells EJ neither Chelsea nor Billie need anything from him.

Gabby fills Duck in on her offer to Shawn. Duck gargles through the beer he continues to inhale, "This ain't cool."

Gabby turns to Shawn, "See he's fine with it."

Shawn takes Duck aside and says he's a hard worker. Duck gets sarcastic. Shawn says if he doesn't want them there he is gone.

"My daughter runs the place," says Duck, "I'm just the owner. So stay out of my way and keep the baby quiet. Keep Claire quiet, too."

Patch says he isn't threatening. He's asking her to leave Stephanie out of this. Kayla wonders what she should tell her. She is running out of lies. "Tell her I'm outta town," growls Patch, "On police business with Bo."

"For all the Days Of Our Lives," asks Kayla.

"It's not impossible the way they drag things out on this show," says Patch, "I'll figure something out.". Kayla says she can't promise him. She has tried everything. Nothing gets through to him.

"Please don't drag her into this," begs Patch.

"You took the gloves off when you gave up on us," says Kayla, "Now I am taking mine off too."

Gabby says, "Duck's tough talk is all an act. He's all quack and no bite." Shawn wants to start working right away. Gabby tells them to go up and get some rest. She assures them there will be plenty of work later. She invites Belle to get food in the kitchen for Claire. Belle leaves with Claire.

Shawn asks Gabby why she is doing this for them. She tells him, "I liked your face, among other things. It's a kind face. You look trustworthy."

Belle comes back and announces she will take Claire upstairs. Gabby offers to feed her, and reaches for Claire. Shawn grabs for Claire like she was just fumbled on the two-yard line.

EJ reminds Lucas he has an expensive wedding coming up. He thinks he should treat his employer with respect. In Lucas' mind, there is a fine line between respect and contempt. Of course, in Lucas' mind a fine line is about all there is room for. EJ tells Billie he understands. He starts to leave, turns at the door and says, "If you're feeling better, you really should call Bo."

Billie tells Lucas, "Don't start with me." Now that EJ is gone, Lucas has grown a pair. He struts around the room either mocking EJ, or doing an imitation of Mr. Magoo trying to sound like Benny Hill, "Nevah mind all Bo's problems, just go out and sell, sell, sell." Lucas says he can't wait to quit and punch EJ for the hell of it.

Meanwhile, out in the hall, Sami comes out of her door for no particular reason and bumps into EJ. He asks about the results of the amnio. Sami reminds him these things take time. "Tick tock, Samantha," says EJ, "Tick tock – Daddy's waiting."

Patch says taking the gloves off is a bad idea for Kayla. He grabs her and asks if she is afraid of him. He drags her to the door and screams, "I've got a knife at her back. I will use it if you get in my way. Back off NOW! Back away from the door or I will hurt her."

Prevuze

Mighty Joe Young backs up. Patch shoves Kayla into him and they both reel backwards. Patch slams the door and locks them in the room.

Belle says she trusts Gabby to take Claire. Shawn apologizes. Gabby orders them to go up and get some rest. The kiddie corps heads upstairs.

Duck tells Gabby, "You're wasting your time. They're a couple. Leave the guy alone, OK?"

"I didn't see a ring on her finger," says Gabby.

Sami says the amnio will take at least a week. Lucas interrupts. EJ excuses himself and goes inside his apartment. Sami and Lucas discuss Billie and Chelsea. Lucas says it was rude to invite Chelsea to stay with them without asking Sami. Sami says they will deal with it. They smooch. EJ sticks his head out and winks at Sami. Sami glares at him and invites Lucas to bed.

Billie stares into her teacup. She wanders. A voice says, "Billie!" Billie looks up and sees Patch standing there. Oh, the shock! FF.


Previews
========

Patch asks Billie, "How long have you and Wells been seeing each other?"

Kayla tees off on EJ, "You don't care about Steve. You have no respect for human life. You don't care about anyone but yourself, so if you made a special trip to the hospital to see him, it was for some other reason and I want you to tell me right now what it was."

Celeste tells Sami, "You're never going to see your child once it's born because the DiMeras will absolutely take it away from you."

9 Comments:

Anonymous KOTU said...

EJ to Willow about Hope's jewelry,"I'm not interested in that tasteless junk."

No Comment.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

6:15 AM  
Anonymous applecheeks said...

Great Prevuisms today. LOL at the "Sheepshank Redemption" and Belch's argument about their argument.

When I saw the last picture I actually expected the caption to be, "Even I can't take any more of this dialogue. And I'm crazy!"

This show just begs to be lampooned! And Prevuze does such a good job of it.

6:48 AM  
Blogger Bulldog said...

Instead of going over to the Y and searching for the check, wouldn't it have been easier for EJ to just call the bank and cancel it? I know, just one of those Daze logic questions.

Loved Jr. crashing the raft into Duck's tree instead of his living room and "keep the baby quiet..and Belle, too". HAHAHAHAHHA

Thoroughly enjoyable Prevuze as always (and thanks for the zap warning!!) :P

7:26 AM  
Blogger Vampire Bear said...

It's only March so we can look forward to this:

april:
celeste : this is getting serious. we've got to do something. ej is obsessed with your baby.
sami : i know.

may:

celeste: sami, listen to me. i need to tell you something.
sami : you've figured out what state we live in?
celeste : no, but I know that ej is obsessed with your baby.
sami : i know, i know.

july
celeste : sami! are you taking those vitamins I gave you?
sami : sure am.
celeste : good. now then - ej...
sami : what is it?
celeste : he's obsessed with your baby! (freeze frame with firey ej in the background)

september
doctor : congratulations, sami. it's a baby boy.
sami : oh, he's so handsome. i think I will name him handsome dan, after the yale mascot. perhaps he will go to yale and then they can tell us what state we are in.
ej : I don't think so, sami. that's my baby and I'm going to name him elvis the third.
sami : your baby? what do you mean?
ej : haven't you figured it out yet? i'm obsessed with your baby and will have him. (exit ej)
sami : damnit. i did not see this coming. why doesn't anyone ever try to warn me?

8:10 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

OMG! Vampire Bear is actually a DOOL writer lurking on Prevuze!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

8:39 AM  
Anonymous applecheeks said...

Hmmmmmm...."Vampire Bear". The name should have given himmer away long ago!! Something has been sucking the life blood out of the scripts for years.

And, vampires are immortal. WHATEVER head writer takes over will be turned to the dark side. DOOL fans are doomed! LOLOLOLOL

9:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please, please give Steve and Kayla a better storyline. This is just awful.

10:10 AM  
Anonymous Maggie said...

Now that EJ is gone, Lucas has grown a pair.

So true. And LOL at Patch's demand.

Every preview scene is an sl with EJ in it. Go James Scott! Now all we need are better sls.

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

steve and kayla and belle and shawn is a snoozefest. I won't be watching tomorrow.

4:35 PM  

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