Thursday, December 28, 2006

A Cauldron Of "What-If's"

Kayla, Patch, Benjy and Sonya sit at dinner. Kayla can't believe they are married and how grown up they are. In Salem, a grownup is a rare thing.

Sonya says, "I'm just glad you made it."

Kayla blushes, "Oh my, I thought we were discreet.

"She meant out of quarantine," says Patch. Sonya toasts them. Benjy toasts true love.

Lexie tells John to hang on. Her medical skills know no bounds. Tek comes back and tells her she has to say she was a witness. He runs out as the cops bust in. Roman leads the charge. Lexie tells him John has two gunshot wounds. Complex medical diagnoses are Lexie's specialty. Roman drags Lexie away. As a doctor, she wants to help, but they want John to live. Roman grills her, "How did you get here before we did?"

Lexie is dazed, "I saw the whole thing."

Sami drives. She tries to bargain with EJ. She will help him escape if he will help save Lucas. He says, "Let's see how convincing you are at the roadblock." He puts on a pair of glasses and a ski cap so they won't recognize him.

Lucas lays lifeless. He hallucinates, "Sami?"

The Ghost of Christmas Ruined appears. "Not even close, sweetheart," says Kate, "I warned you."

"You're not here," says Lucas. Kate pulls a box of shoes out of her shopping bag and asks where Sami is. She tires on the shoes, rejects them, opens another and tries them on. She says Lucas has to face the facts. Sami has left him to die, "She's tossed you away like a pair of old shoes. Sami has deserted you."

Bo busts into the warehouse and points his shotgun at Patrick, "Get the hell away from her."

Patrick yells, "Don't shoot!"

Bo screams, "Back up! Get away from her!"

Patrick tells Bo she's having the baby. Bo falls in a heap beside Hope. Patrick does the same thing. A woman having a baby can turn a couple of grown men to jello faster than anything.

Bo holds Patrick off and calls an ambulance. Hope screams. The contractions are a minute apart. Hope yells, "I need to push!"

"No pushing," says Bo, "Breathe!"

Roman grills Lexie. She says she was driving to pick Abe up. Dashboard lights started blinking, so she stopped and called for a tow. Car trouble can turn a grown woman to jello faster than anything. She saw the lights on in the building up there and figured someone was there. She heard two men arguing and peeked in. That's when she saw John, and saw and what happened, "I think it was EJ Wells."

Roman growls, "What the hell do you mean you think?"

"It happened so fast," says Lexie, "The man with the gun ran. Then I went in and stopped the bleeding."

Roman asks, "Will you go on record and tell us it was EJ?"

Lexie nukes, "I don't need all these questions!"

The cop asks Sami for license and registration. Clark Kent looks away. Sami tries to be cheerful. She tells the cop it's a friend's car. The cop goes back to his cruiser.

"It's a God given talent to lie that way Samantha," says EJ, "Just don't forget, if I have to shoot my way out with a hostage, I have no problem with that."

The cop comes back to the window. Sami asks if she's free to go. The cop answers, "It's slick, so drive careful."

Sami thanks the cop as he walks away. EJ congratulates her. She asks if he will help with Lucas.

Kate sips champagne. Lucas insists Sami is coming back, "She loves me and she loves Will."

"Not as much as she loves Sami," says Kate. Kate disappears. Lucas calls for her, and then for Sami.

Sami asks again. If EJ helps her save Lucas, she will cover for him. "I have an idea," says EJ, "I'll help you and Lucas if..."

Sami interrupts, "I'll do it. Whatever it is, I'll do it."

"It's you," says EJ


"I want you, Samantha," says EJ, "I want to have sex with you." Sami gasps.

As Kayla leaves the table, she tells Benjy and Sonya they should come over for dinner sometime. Sonya tells Patch she doesn't look a day older. Benjy thinks they have better hair now. "What," asks Patch, "You didn't like our Big 80's do's?" Patch gets a call. He leaves.

Sonya asks what Benjy is waiting for, "Give him the thing so we can get out of here!"

Roman apologizes for coming on so strong. Lexie understands. Another cop comes up and whispers something. Roman tells him to get the ambulance going. He tells Lexie her car is missing. Lexie thanks him.

Roman says, "If you want to thank me, then help us nail EJ."

Hope pushes. The baby pops. Push... Pop... Presto... A kid! Dang, this childbirth thing is easy. "You have a baby girl," says Bo. Patrick takes it. Bo congratulates her.

Hope asks to hold her. Bo turns to Patrick, "Hope and I will raise her and I will love her as if she were my own."

Patrick drops the bomb, "And she is."

Bo says, "What are you talking about? You are the father."

"No, I'm not," says Patrick, "She's your daughter, Bo. Yours and Hope's."

Lexie wanders and thinks about her argument with Tek.

Sami says EJ is out of his mind, "Why would you even want to? You could have any woman you want?"

EJ says, "My father framed it as a request but... He had me come to Salem to plant the DiMera seed in the Brady of my choice. It is an honor."

"I don't think of it as that."

"Your beauty is a given," says EJ, "But beauty can be bought. Your spirit is priceless. You have enough spirit to keep this interesting for years. Don't let this be a window-fogged moment in the back of a car. Make it something special."

Sami reels, "If you touch me, I swear to God..."

"Yes," slobbers EJ, "Threaten! Spell out the depths of my punishment! Incredible!"

Sami asks, "This is turning you on?"

EJ asks, "Would you rather save your virtue and condemn Lucas to die, or give a handsome devil his due?"


Lucas calls for Sami. Will appears to him. He tries to brush of the snow, but he can't because he's really not there. Lucas says he needs a nap. Will urges him not to give up, "Hang on for me. Please Dad."

Kayla and Patch arrive back at the table at the same time. Patch says John was shot and is on the way to the hospital.

Sonya says, "Before you leave, Benjy has something..." Steve says they have no time for that. He leaves with Kayla. "Benjy, go after him," says Sonya, "Get it over with."

They wheel John into the ER. Marlena meets him. He opens his eyes. She says he will be all right.

John mumbles.

"I can't understand," says Marlena, "Try again."

"Are you going to wait until I recover to kill me? "

Patrick tells them he paid Dr. Bader to tell them the baby was his. Hope asks why he is telling them this now.

"I am no saint but I am not a murderer," says Patrick, "I'm not even that good at being a bad guy. I'm sorry I put you through this." Hope says he did the right thing.

The doctors kick Marlena out so they can insert a chest tube. Medical procedures make her ill. Outside, she meets Patch and Kayla. She gives them an update, "He promised he wouldn't get involved."

Patch walks into John's room. Staredown.

Marlena asks why John would have gotten involved after promising her he wouldn't. Kayla says, "We can't change the people we love."

Patch gives John the same impeccable medical advice as Lexie, "Hang in there." John chokes. Patch calls for reinforcements. The doctors, Marlena and Kayla come rushing in. Marlena handles the oxygen.

Lexie tells Abe she did everything she could for John, "I told him to hang in there twice." Abe interrupts. Roman asks one last time for a statement. He tells Abe Lexie was upset, so she didn't give one.

"My brain is jumbled," says Lexie.

"Good," says Roman, "If you're back to feeling normal, then you can give us a statement." Lexie insists she has told them what she knows. Roman presses. Abe urges her to go ahead, "We want to hear from you... what you did... what you saw... in your own words." Lexie stares.

Lucas sleeps. Will tries to wake him up. Lucas says, "Oh Will, I love you. Will? Will?" Nothing. Lucas sits up, and then grimaces and lies back down.

Sami cries, "So you're going to blackmail me and rape me? That's how you like it?"

"I like getting what I want," says EJ, "How does it feel to hold Lucas' life in your hands. Or should I say between your..."

Sami shuts him up, "All right you win! I want a guarantee. How do I know you won't just leave me in the snow?"

EJ says, "Life is a cauldron of 'what-if's.' Promises... Betrayal... No guarantees."

"You will burn in hell," says Sami.

"I know," says EJ, "My place is already set at that table. Now, let's get the festivities started." He reaches for her.

Sami spits, "No! I'll do it!" She removes her jacket, "You are only getting my body."

"That's all I've ever wanted." EJ moves in.

Pan down on the car. Sami is dazed as she zips up, "Happy now?"

"Blissfully," says EJ, "I am afloat on a sea of endorphins. You must congratulate Lucas. If I see him again, I will tell him...


Sami says, "You aren't going to say anything to him! If you do anything to hurt us I will hunt you down and kill you!"

EJ threatens, "If you ever raise your hand to me again, it will be the last thing you ever do."

"Listen," says Sami, "Honor your promises, and then you can slither back under whatever rock you came from."

Lexie shows Roman and Abe the window is dirty, "I didn't have a good view. It looked like EJ."

Roman stops her, "If you aren't sure, then our hands are tied and a guilty man could walk away scott-free."

Hope is on a gurney. She tells Bo she has wished for a second chance for them so they can move forward after Zack's death. Bo says what they lost they can't get back. Hope says, "But we found each other again. When we found out you were really Zack's father you loved him as your own and that was the greatest gift... now we have this little life."

"She's a sign that we are meant to be together for all the Days Of Our Lives," says Bo.

Marlena asks John to look at her.

"Killer," says John, "Killer."

"No," says Marlena, "My serial killer days are behind me." Pan in on Patch.

John's machines play a symphony. Dr. Berman says they have to get him to the OR. Marlena turns and says, "Steve, he was looking at you when he said 'killer.'" They wheel John off. "He can't die," says Marlena.

Roman tells Lexie forensics has nothing. Lexie is all they have. They need her to be clear, "EJ is a bad man. Can you live with yourself if he slips through our fingers?"

Bo tells Hope he has to deal with Lockhart. He will meet them at the hospital. Hope tells him to start thinking of a name.

Outside, Bo questions Patrick about Wells. Patrick says he will retract his statement about Bo attacking him, but he can't incriminate EJ, "I won't commit suicide."

Bo asks, "Are you scared of that scum?"

"Yeah," says Patrick, "You should be too."

Bo is disgusted, "Get him out of here." The cops haul off the perp. Bo grits, "Dammit!"

EJ and Sami come into the cabin. Lucas is alive, but unconscious. Sami orders EJ to help. He says she's ruining his endorphin high. Together, they pull the beam off of Lucas.

"We have to get him to the hospital," says Sami. EJ doesn't have the time. He invites her to come with him. She'd rather die.

EJ points his pistol at her, "If you tell the cops you saw me, you will wish you were dead. If I get arrested, I will tell them that you helped me escape, and we've been sleeping together for months. And when Lucas comes to hear that you and I have known each other..."

"You bastard."

"You have a lot to lose, sweetheart. So listen. After this, you'd better keep your little... mouth... shut."

"After what," sneers Sami.

"This," says EJ. He grabs her and kisses her. Sami struggles.

Roman keeps working on Lexie. Abe backs him off, "Lexie will talk when she is rested." Lexie says she will be there and do what she can.

Sami spits him out, "Help me with Lucas or get away!"

"Get away is what I plan to do," says EJ, "Thank you for a wonderful evening. I will never forget you." Sami throws boards at him.

"Thai's why I love you," says EJ as he leaves. Sami vows to get Lucas out and protect him. She pulls the blanket up around him.

Bo arrives at the hospital. Hope knows things are all right now. She sends Bo to see how John is doing.

Bo walks outside and sees Marlena. He asks how John is doing. Marlena hits him with the wrath of hell, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT! IF HE DIES YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU IF HE DIES!" Marlena storms off.

That went well.

Patch and Kayla walk down the hall of the hospital. Benjy stalks. Patch sends Kayla on to find out what happened, "I'm gonna hang here."

Kayla leaves and Benjy comes up to Patch, "Benjy, what the hell you doin' here. Man?"

Benjy signs. Patch asks, "Something you need to give me? It must be something important if you came all the way down here." Benjy kisses him on both cheeks, "Benjy, what the hell..." He hands Patch the devil card (we thought it was the death card - thanks to a sharp-eyed reader for catching that) and hustles off. Patch looks at the card and shudders.


Lexie says, "Going blind is scary." Abe says, "I'd rather die."

Nick the Geek says, "I know how you feel." Billie says, "How do you know all that." Nick says, "Because I feel the same." Billie says, "God help you."

Kayla gasps, "Steve! Steve!" Steve huffs and puffs.

Marlena tells Sami, "My husband is fighting for his life because it was more important for him to be a hero."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone interested in joining my lynching mob to hang Elvis by his microscopic male anatomy, the lineup starts here.

4:02 AM  
Anonymous cassie1013 said...

I knew this was going to happen - they're leaving the Ejami scene debatable. I personally still think it was rape. but IS IT? Like you don't know. SHE SAID OK. Damn.

4:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sami called it rape. Her life was threatened. Lucas' life was threatened. Sex by coercion IS rape.

4:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Benjy looks reluctant to hurt Steve. He's a DiMera, but not completely evil, perhaps. Maybe he'll be a shades of grey character. I love those conflicted souls. Looks like his wife Sonia has no trouble with the idea that Steve and Kayla will be hurt, the way she was urging Benjy to give the card to Steve. I don't like her.

The baby's born. Can't wait to see the Bo/Hope/baby stuff.

I guess the fact that in Canada Days will soon be on the same schedule as the United States might impact the site. Will it become Revuez? Because we love the snarky comments, even if we read them after the show airs.

7:08 AM  
Anonymous applecheeks said...

They have, of course, set up the "whose baby will it be" scenario for 9 months from now - EJ or Lucas?

And speaking of babies, Prevuze beat me to the punch with that "easy childbirth" observation. How long was Hope in labor? Like, two minutes??

But heck, the kid is at least 12 months old, almost to the day. She was more than ready to pop out!!!

LOL at all of the quips about Lexi's medical skills. Gripping Prevuze today!

7:08 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"I guess the fact that in Canada Days will soon be on the same schedule as the United States might impact the site. Will it become Revuez? Because we love the snarky comments, even if we read them after the show airs."

Prevuze is based on when the show feeds, not when it airs. We will still be coming to you early. It's just a question of whether it will be a day early, or the morning of the show.

7:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...



7:17 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"They have, of course, set up the "whose baby will it be" scenario for 9 months from now - EJ or Lucas?"

I'm confused. Isn't the gestation period on this show 12 months?

7:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder if Bo would cheat on his real wife??? omg, he is such a hottie! I would wrap his gifts anytime..

Hope is such a lucky one!

7:20 AM  
Blogger Bulldog said...

Why is that stupid Lexie covering for Tek? I don't get that. Just tell them he's the one who was hanging around and said he saw the shooting - not to mention he violated the restraining order again. What a dope!

The officers at the roadblock must be members of the Salem PD if they couldn't recognize the suspect they were looking for just because he's wearing sunglasses and a hat. "Clark Kent" is right. HAHAHAHA

Great poem and pictures today. Thanks!!

8:31 AM  
Anonymous kotu said...

"I'm confused. Isn't the gestation period on this show 12 months?"

I can understand your confusion, Prevuze. Perhaps DAZE is working on the law of averages - the baby gestates for 11-12 months (i.e., Claire & the newest Brady), but the mothers only look pregnant for a month or two (i.e., Belle & Hope). It 'kind of' averages out to 9 months.

And, I know what you are thinking Prevuze. I'm using the term loosely, so don't give me any lectures on what the "law of averages" would really be!! hahahahahaha

8:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How do you get the show before we see it?

9:13 AM  
Anonymous Frog said...

I can't wait to hear what lame story they're going to come up with to make this Bo's kid, considering since last New Year's Eve when Zack was run over Hope has pretty much hated Bo (until just this last couple of weeks). It really irks me when writers change history like we aren't supposed to remember this.

10:23 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"How do you get the show before we see it?"

We pay off the DiMeras.

10:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just a point of information: The tarot card that Stefano gave John was the "death" card. But the card that Benji gave Steve is the "devil" card. Two different cards with entirely different meanings.

11:28 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"Just a point of information: The tarot card that Stefano gave John was the "death" card. But the card that Benji gave Steve is the "devil" card. Two different cards with entirely different meanings."

Thanks! We're not into Tarot cards, so it's good to see we have readers who are on the ball.

12:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is the stupidest thing I've ever read! Don't try to fight him or steal the car keys. Sami could've knocked him out with a beam. Her solution to this problem was dense and the whole spreading seed....EEWWW!!!

5:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm. I might actually have to start paying attention to what's going on now! I never realized there were so many Dimera's around.

Love all the ripping on Lexie! Keep up the good work.

8:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love this site. You make my day, every day. Thanks for your winning humor. I especially liked the limerick.

7:38 PM  

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