Wednesday, March 01, 2006

I Have Never Worked With An Animal Like You

Frankie holds his hands over Jennifer's eyes. They come into a fancy decorated dining room. Jennifer is amazed, "Oh my gosh, where did you bring me, Paris, Vienna?

"You really need to get out more," says Frankie, "This is a private room at Chez Rouge."

They sit down and Jennifer asks, "So tell me how you knew."

Frankie takes the bait, "Knew what?"

"That I was feeling so down and didn't know what I needed," says Jennifer. Frankie beams.

Mimi's shower and Shawn's bachelor pool-party combo is in full swing at Alice's. Bonnie thanks a crewmember for helping with the party, "You have made this place shine!"

Calliope comes up behind her and says in her best Texas drawl, "What you mean is spit-shine!" Bonnie gives her a quizzical look.

Tek shows up at Lexie's table, "Run away with me."

"Tek," she says, "Stop it!"

Abe comes to the table, "Is there a problem here."

Roman comes up to Kate, "So, you are crashing my nephew's bachelor party? Well, there are a lot of men here, so it is a good place for you to be."

"I am here for Mimi's shower," says Kate.

"What the hell are you up to," asks Roman.

"What," says Kate, "I should be home suffering because Roman Brady ditched me. As you can see I'm having a good time." They point the camera up Kate's dress as she crosses her legs. You can't get this kind of high class entertainment anywhere else.

Victor comes up to the table, "I hope you're not harassing my date, Roman."

Phillip leaves Belle alone outside. Mimi and Shawn walk up. Belle eavesdrops. Mimi flashes back to arguing with Bonnie about Claire's paternity. Shawn asks, "What's wrong, are you getting cold feet about marrying me?" Belle stands in the bushes and waits for Mimi's answer.

Bo works on the wounded Billie. Billie is peeved, "You shot me!"

"I'm sorry," says Bo. The bullet hit her in the arm. Bo starts to go for the first aid kit.

Billie yells, "NO! Don't leave me." She reels him in for a passionate kiss.

Patrick arrives at his beach house. He walks in the front door and then into another room. Hope arrives at her beech house. The same beach house. The porter tells her about the place and reminds her the flower will bring her love. He takes off.

Hope leaves the room. Patrick comes in. He checks out the open door. Hope unpacks. Pictures of the family and Zack. She misses him so much and decides a glass of wine would be nice. She leaves the bedroom as Patrick stalks with a knife. Oh, the drama! How do the writers come up with this stuff?

Billie and Bo roll in the snow. You didn't buy it, did you? Back to reality. Bo wakes Billie up and we start over with the whole thing. He apologizes. "I shoulda been wearing my orange vest," says Billie.

He picks her up. She protests, "Hey, it's my arm you shot. My legs still work."

Back at the fire, he tends to her arm. Bo feels like his life is over. Billie insists he can go back to Hope. He tells her "Hope has gone to God knows where." Billie tries to be optimistic. Bo ain't buying it, "I didn't tell her what was happening when it happened. I will be sorry for that all the Days Of Our Lives. If she came back right now I don't know if I would take her back. Wherever she is I hope she's happy."

Hope comes out of the room. Patrick attacks her. They recognize each other. Hope asks, "Patrick! Why are you here?"

"I live here."

"I just rented the place," says Hope, "Why would they do that when they know you live here?"

"Things are more relaxed down here," says Patrick, "but no less stupid. Is Bo with you?"

"No," says Hope, "I'm not sure I ever want to see him again."

Glasses clink at Chez Rouge. Jennifer is having fun. The audience isn't. Frankie asks about Hope. Jennifer doesn't know if she will be gone long. She was devastated about what Bo did. Then there was the Bo and Billie thing in the motel room. Jennifer can't imagine them not being together.

Frankie says, "You used to say the same thing about us." Jennifer stares.

Mimi says she isn't getting cold feet. She wants to marry him. She's just not excited about the shower. Belle watches. In they go. Caroline comes up and tells Belle not to do this to herself.

Bonnie tells Calliope she shouldn't be talking to Belle about belonging with Shawn like she did at the loft.

Abe says, "Sounds like the two of you are arguing about something."

Lexie flashes back to the romp on her desk and says, "I am very upset with Tek and he knows why. He shouldn't have dragged you out to this party."

"You worry too much about me," says Abe, "You know what a pool shark I am. Nothing would have kept me from this party."

The shark and the predator go over to play a game of pool.

Caroline knows this is hard for Belle, "Don't make the mistake I made. Stay away from the uncertified plastic surgeons. And be faithful to your husband."

Belle is adamant, "I love Shawn too much to let him go."

Patrick pours wine. They toast peaceful nights. The night is hardest for Hope. Patrick asks if Bo knows she is here. She dodges the question. She asks how he found this place.

"A few years ago I needed a place to get away," says Patrick, "Now I just come here to relax." Well, that certainly clears things up.

"I'm guessing you had to get away from Billie," says Hope.

"No," says Patrick, "From you."

Billie tries to convince Bo to take Hope back. Bo drinks and philosophizes. "Love works because you make it work. It's over, or Hope wouldn't have gotten on that damn plane. She has closed herself off to me. She knows how much I love her and that I would never be unfaithful."

Billie flashes back to the hotel room and cries, "The situation with Hope is a lot more complicated than you think. She left because of me."

"You don't have any reason to blame yourself," says Bo.

"Yes, I do," says Billie, "I did something totally unforgivable."

Jennifer says, "That seems like 100 years ago."

"I guess love can fade away," says Frankie.

"I don't believe that," says Jennifer.

Belle comes in. Mimi greets her. Calliope gathers everyone around for the festivities. Bonnie thinks the shower is dull, "OMG, why did I hire this woman? I know what to do."

Tek toasts Lexie.

Victor grills Kate about telling the truth.

Kate leaves, Phillip replaces her and wants to know what they were talking about. Now who's not saying anything, Victor?

Bo and Billie argue. Billie says Hope resents the fact that Bo had a child with her. "That was a long time ago," says Bo, "Let's get you to a doctor."

Billie says, "OK, but I should drive." She rummages through her purse and guess what, can't find her keys. How conveeennniiieeennnttt .

Bo's bike is disabled and just maybe he shouldn't drive, anyway. How conveeennniiieeennnttt .

No problem. Billie will call for help on her cell phone. But wait! It's dead. How conveeennniiieeennnttt .

Bo says they will have to spend the night, but he only has one sleeping bag. All together now... How conveeennniiieeennnttt .

Patrick backpedals, "It's just that Bo has a hard time with me comforting you. I just don't want to be the reason the two of you break up." He notices the flower, "I see you have discovered our island's native flower. You know the story about it, don't you?"

"The man said I would find love."

"No," says Patrick, "It's more caustic than poison ivy. You shouldn't be holding it. It could mean you will reconnect with an old love. You know, you and Bo are a legendary love. Are you sure you don't want to try to work this out?"

Hope says, "Bo moved on to someone else, so there is really no marriage for me to go home to."

Jennifer doesn't think true love ever fades away. Frankie has one more surprise for her. Cue the music, "May I have this dance?" "With every touch, every move, my love is yours alone..."

Closer... closer... kiss.

Abe sinks the two-ball. Shawn comes up and does a buddy hug with Roman. Roman suggests postponing the wedding until Hope can be there. Shawn can't do that to Mimi. Roman doesn't think his parents will be apart for long. Shawn says, "Regardless of how I feel about my lying, traitorous scumbag unfaithful wretch of a father, I want my parents to be together."

Calliope announces, "Mimi will now open her 4th of July present but save the fireworks for the wedding night."

Mimi returns to her seat and Calliope follows, "Mimi, I ran into an old high school friend of yours – Heather. I don't know if I invited her or she invited herself."

"Heather," asks Mimi, "We hated each other."

Heather walks up, "Mimi Lockhart... I see Shawn settled for second best." She turns to Belle, "How did you let Shawn get away."

Belle says, "It took stupidity almost beyond anything humanly possible, but that is what I am really good at."

Caroline takes the bows from the presents and pretends they are a hat. She is just the life of the party.

Bonnie has had it. She steps up to the mike, "Caroline put the ribbons down. This shower is about to get hotter."

The Chippendale stripper comes out. Disappointment reigns because it isn't Bart, but eventually everyone settles down and enjoys the show.

Lexie watches the dancer and imagines it is Tek. He struts over and dances around her. Kiss. Swoon. Lexie snaps out of it as the Tek look-alike dances on. Lexie bolts. Tek follows.

Calliope tells Bonnie she thinks it was disrespectful of Bonnie to do this. She picks up a plate full of cake and smashes it in Bonnie's face.

Tek catches Lexie, "This is wrong, Tek."

"We know it's wrong," says Tek, "Lexie, I dream about being naked with you."

"No," says Lexie, "I don't want to be here." He carries her off as Abe comes out yelling for her.

Frankie and Jennifer dance. Kiss.

We hear the sound of fireworks as Jennifer says, "I know this may sound stupid..."

"No," says Frankie, "I heard it too." They rush to the window. Outside, fireworks go off. Frankie says, "I thought it was us."

Jennifer says, "Yeah, me too."

Frankie says, "I guess we're not the only ones celebrating tonight." No, it's the sound of the show bombing. He moves in for the kiss.

Calliope says, "I cannot believe I just did that, but I have worked on thousands of weddings and I have never worked with an animal like you." Bonnie retaliates. Calliope licks the cake around her lips and says, "It's a good bakery."

Heather piles on, "Too bad if you can't take the truth, Lockhart. Belle deserves to be with Shawn."

Mimi walks off. She tells Belle, "You and Shawn are the real thing."

"She's right," says Belle. Shawn comes up to her. Belle needs to talk. So what's new?

Mimi tells Bonnie she can't keep lying to Shawn.

Tek and Lexie are inside a SUV, which bounces like a jackhammer. Abe ignores the bumper sticker, "If this truck's a rockin – don't come a knockin' "

Lexie moans. Abe moans, "Noooooooo."

Patrick tells Hope, "Bo has been your everything."

"Not any more," says Hope, "That ended when he chose Billie and Chelsea over our little boy."

Billie and Bo sleep. She dreams of Hope confronting her with Bo watching, "I can't believe you made me think you slept with my husband." They leave as Billie yells for Bo. She wakes with a start and tells Bo she had a nightmare. Bo is there to comfort her. How conveeennniiieeennnttt . FF.


Previews
========

Shawn says to Belle, "What is it? Just tell me." Phillip says, "I know exactly what she wants to tell you, Shawn."

Mimi says to Bonnie, "He is going to find out because I am going to tell him, Mom."

Marlena says, "These threats against my husband have to stop, and stop now." John swills his drink and nods like a bobblehead in an earthquake.

Alex says, "It won't be long now 'till it'll all be over and I will have finally had my revenge."

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOVED the pictures!! High class entertainment indeed today.

I'm also glad to see Roman finally made it out of the sack with Nicole. Just in time for a party, but not for his nephew's funeral. How conveeeenient.

I'll be laughing all day at this episode.

6:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad someone else hated that top of Chelseas. I just thought I was getting too old to be hip but you are right it is butt ugly.

6:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WHHHHYYYY couldn't bo have hit billie in the chest and killed her instantly?? *whines like chelsea*

1:04 PM  

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