The Guy With The Nail In His Eye
"Wow," says Brady, "And there I thought I didn't like the guy."
Phillip shows up at the DiMera mansion wanting to know why he was summoned. EJ tells him his company is no longer interested in the Alternative Fuels Project. "Couldn't we have done this over the phone," asks Phillip.
"No," says EJ, "I wouldn't have been able to reach you."
"because you're not in. You're here."
Will walks into Lucas hospital room, "I was in the neighborhood, so I thought I would drop in." Sami goes off-the-scale giddy. Sami has more emotions than Ben and Jerry have flavors.
Victor and Kate sit together in the pub and plot. They agree they now see eye to eye about Chloe. Kate wants to cause her "deep psychological pain with lasting impact. Chloe must suffer like never before."
"That's impossible," says Victor, "The woman has been with Lucas, Brady and Phillip. That's enough suffering for a lifetime."
Chloe shows up at Maggie's to pick up Allie. Chloe is just all cheery-cheery bouncy-bouncy and offers to help Maggie gather up Allie's things. Maggie is cold as hardened steel. Chloe begs her to get along with her for Lucas' sake. Maggie thinks it's more interesting and fun to argue and dig out more incriminating details about Chloe's disgusting relationship with Daniel.
Will says he heard they were letting Sami out of the witness protection program, but he decided to come home anyway. He wants to know how Lucas accident happened and gets nasty when Sami wants to change the subject.
Speaking of nasty, Maggie lectures. Chloe says she just wants to make Lucas happy. In between romps with Daniel. Maggie asks, "Don't you think Lucas deserves better than you?"
"Simon Legree deserves better than me, but what does that have to do with anything," asks Chloe.
Kate has a plan, "We have to find a new woman suitable for Lucas."
"That's easy," says Victor, "An inflatable sex doll." CENSORED.
Kate snickers, "You're so bad." Stefano joins them and interrupts the giggling. Victor tells him he's not welcome.
Phillip asks, "Why would I hurt your damn family? Nicole happens to be a friend of mine."
EJ says, "You need some new friends. She's too soft hearted and trusting. I've advised her to stay away from people who suck the life out of her. But she's still with me anyway. You stay away from her. I won't tell you again."
Brady says EJ can't tell Nicole who her friends are. Nicole reminds Brady she's lovestruck over EJ.
"You sound like a Stepford wife," snorts Brady, "Why are you cowering like this? What has he done to you?"
"Phillip knows we're keeping a secret from EJ," says Nicole, "He saw us together. He thinks we're having an affair and wants the Alternative Fuels Project back and so he's blackmailing me. So I persuaded EJ to give it up. The project is yours."
"Let me get this straight," says Brady, "Phillip is blackmailing you for something you didn't do. So he's either got to be the sharpest blackmailer in the world or you've got to be the dumbest victim ever. And since we all know Phillip is a few peas short of a casserole, I guess that answers it."
Nicole says, "You have to keep your distance."
Brady asks, "Does that mean that you cut me out of your life?"
Nicole says, "No. It means I didn't use my mouthwash this morning."
Phillip is skeptical, "I get the Alternative Fuels Project if I never speak to Nicole again? You don't choose my friends. I'm not afraid of you or any DiMera."
"Then you're a bigger fool than I thought," EJ closes the door.
Will tells Sami and Lucas he went to visit John and Marlena, "John is making progress, but that squint therapy is really tough." Lucas invites him to stay at the love shed with him and Chloe. Will doesn't seem too excited at that prospect, so Lucas suggest he could stay with his mom. Sami tells him to stay where he wants. We spend about a half hour on this earthshaking decision and Will finally decides on the townhouse over the Lucas-Chloe romper room.
Sami is beside herself, "Having you back is making me all crazy and emotional."
Lucas jumps in, "Don't blame yourself, Will. The sun coming up makes her all crazy and emotional." Sami announces she has to go pick up Johnny. Lucas wonders what's keeping Chloe.
Chloe tells Maggie about her sign from God. Maggie mocks, but agrees to keep her mouth shut, "I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for Lucas and the fact that it will be a bigger bombshell when I drop it later."
Brady wants to know why Nicole would allow Phillip to blackmail her when they are not sleeping together. "I'm paying it forward," says Nicole, "I'm sure at some point you'll jump into the sack with your old grandma." She insists she's happy and very close to getting everything she ever dreamed of. Brady tells her she has to think of her daughter too. Nicole insists she is.
Brady says, "It's not just Phillip, but you've got Dr. Baker to worry about. How many times are you going to let somebody put the screws to you to keep this a secret?"
Chloe delivers Allie to Sami. Sami promises never to leave her again. "I guess I'll just have to run away then," says Allie. Chloe tries to play nice, "Oh, I see you had your baby." That does it. Unstable Sami kicks her to the curb.
Sami slams the door on Chloe and flashes back to the time she took Grace to the dump... uh... convent and abandoned her. Another knock interrupts. Sami explodes, "WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?" She opens the door to find EJ.
Lucas and Will have a man-to man talk. Let me rephrase that. Lucas and Will have a father-son talk. Lucas asks about Will's love life.
"Well," says Will, "There was Heidi... and then there was Martina... and then..."
Lucas interrupts, "You're just like your old man."
"I know," says Will, "Women don't stay around long with me either. So, What wasn't that Mom didn't want me to know so bad? Why are you really in Salem Hospital?"
Lucas says, "Because there was no bed available in a good hospital."
Stefano says, "I will leave if Mr. Kiriakis is going to act like an ill mannered lout." Kate insists he stay and Stefano sits down. He and Victor argue about corporate espionage. Stefano suggests they focus on what they have in common, "Our devotion to family."
"I think I'm going to throw up," says Victor. A woman from the audience runs up onto stage and hands Victor one of the complimentary barf bags handed out at the beginning of each episode. Kate tries to referee.
Stefano asks about her health and Kate tells him about her miracle remission. Stefano beams, "This calls for a celebration! The drinks are on me."
Victor growls, "I'd rather put a nail in my eye." He leaves
IT'S DAYS OF OUR LIVES 3D!
Brady reaches through the TV screen and hands you a zapper. Use it whenever he and Nicole are on.
EJ tells Sami he is there to deliver the laughing penguin, "I can't imagine how you got Johnny to sleep without it. In fact, I'm thinking of picking one up for myself."
As the laughing penguin provides the only meaningful intelligence in the room, EJ tells Sami she can keep Johnny for a few more days. He assures her he will never shunt Johnny aside. Sami says she knows EJ is a good father, but it's Nicole she's worried about. EJ says Johnny missed his mother while she was away. We roll into a gooey mutual admiration society as the two gush over each other and exchange tender glances of longing.
Lucas fesses up, "I made a bad decision. I went out of the house without supervision." He tells Will about his drinking.
Will judges and lectures, "So the gas explosion was..."
"Right," says Lucas, "I lit a match to read the address on EJ's door and my breath ignited. I'm sorry I let you down and let myself down. I Hope you're not sorry you came home."
Victor returns to the mansion. Phillip shows him the Alternative Fuels Project plan. He says he got Nicole to work on it and the ball is back in the Kiriakis court. Victor wonders how this wound up in EJ's hands in the first place.
"Melanie," says Phillip.
Victor growls, "I know that... but how did she manage it? Find out or find a new job."
EJ and Sami share small talk. Allie cries and Sami runs in to check on her. EJ takes the opportunity to call Stefano, "Phillip Kiriakis took the bait."
Sami brings the kids out.
Nicole and Brady. Zzzzzaaaaappppp... Brady encourages her to leave EJ. Nicole don' wanna. "When they find out what you did," says Brady, "your whole little perfect life will go up in smoke."
Phillip is upset that he came through for Victor and Victor turned around and threatened to fire him. Victor thinks this is about Stephanie. Phillip tells him he and Stephanie are done. He rages and pours another drink.
Stefano turns on the charm, "Katharina, you always look beautiful, but tonight you have a certain aura."
"That's because I didn't shower after my workout," says Kate.
"And what about this doctor of yours," says Stefano, "How is that going?"
"Daniel and I are no longer seeing each other," says Kate.
"And," continues Stefano, "What about the guy with the nail in his eye?"
"I'm not seeing him either," says Kate, "I'm free right now."
"That's good news," says Stefano, "Because you used to be pretty expensive. what do you say we have dinner?"
Nicole says Brady is depressing her and scaring her. A gal in the audience turns to her neighbor, "Me, too. This is depressing me and I'm scared it will never end."
Brady says, "The person who loves EJ is some weird and submissive person and that's not the person you are." Brady says he knows she really is a good person.
Nicole thanks him and says she is trying to allow herself some happiness, "But that's hard when people want me to fail, like Sami who is back in town."
Sami and EJ share a bouncing baby family moment with the kids. EJ takes the kids in to bed. Sami calls Sister Teresa and tells her to kiss Grace goodnight. She says she's coming up with a plan.
Kate hesitates. Stefano says he's not proposing this time, "Just a quiet dinner." Kate says she will think about it.
Will says he isn't sorry he came home.
Chloe shows up. OK, now Will's sorry he came home. Chloe heads toward him for a big hug and Will backs off like a cornered dog. Chloe wonders what's got him so upset. Will explodes, "My dad almost died and you're the reason."
Chloe falls apart, "You're right. I'm such a horrible person for tying him down ad pouring all that alcohol down his throat."
Nicole tells Brady she saw Sami and it was awkward and horrible. Nicole thinks Sami's out to steal EJ. Brady asks why Nicole thinks that. "Because I don't think I'm worthy of EJ or anyone else," says Nicole.
Brady spews, "You don't look in the mirror and see how beautiful you are do you? You don't see you are smart or funny."
Nicole has a pity party, "You forgot about me bing the biggest screw up you've ever known."
"You've been unlucky," says Brady.
Nicole gets all gooey, "Except for having you as a friend." Smoochie. "Thank you," says Nicole, "for being the best friend I don't deserve."
Sami announces the kids are asleep. She asks why EJ is really there. He reminds her of the penguin delivery. Sami thinks it's more than that. She thinks if he were really happy at home he'd be there right now. She asks if maybe he's reconsidering getting married.
EJ ponders, "Maybe I shouldn't marry Nicole... What if I made her worst nightmare come true and married you?"
Out in the audience, a Lumi fan stands and screams, "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" She plunges a dagger into her heart. An usher runs down to her and checks her out, "CLEANUP ON AISLE SEVEN!" Mercifully, they had to stop the show at this point to mop up, so we'll pick up where things left off on Monday...
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