Friday, February 27, 2009

The Guy With The Nail In His Eye

Brady runs out of a building and bumps into Nicole. We share an uncomfortable moment. Nicole tells him to leave her alone, "EJ said I can't see you again."

"Wow," says Brady, "And there I thought I didn't like the guy."

Phillip shows up at the DiMera mansion wanting to know why he was summoned. EJ tells him his company is no longer interested in the Alternative Fuels Project. "Couldn't we have done this over the phone," asks Phillip.

"No," says EJ, "I wouldn't have been able to reach you."


"because you're not in. You're here."

Will walks into Lucas hospital room, "I was in the neighborhood, so I thought I would drop in." Sami goes off-the-scale giddy. Sami has more emotions than Ben and Jerry have flavors.

Victor and Kate sit together in the pub and plot. They agree they now see eye to eye about Chloe. Kate wants to cause her "deep psychological pain with lasting impact. Chloe must suffer like never before."

"That's impossible," says Victor, "The woman has been with Lucas, Brady and Phillip. That's enough suffering for a lifetime."

Chloe shows up at Maggie's to pick up Allie. Chloe is just all cheery-cheery bouncy-bouncy and offers to help Maggie gather up Allie's things. Maggie is cold as hardened steel. Chloe begs her to get along with her for Lucas' sake. Maggie thinks it's more interesting and fun to argue and dig out more incriminating details about Chloe's disgusting relationship with Daniel.

Will says he heard they were letting Sami out of the witness protection program, but he decided to come home anyway. He wants to know how Lucas accident happened and gets nasty when Sami wants to change the subject.

Speaking of nasty, Maggie lectures. Chloe says she just wants to make Lucas happy. In between romps with Daniel. Maggie asks, "Don't you think Lucas deserves better than you?"

"Simon Legree deserves better than me, but what does that have to do with anything," asks Chloe.

Kate has a plan, "We have to find a new woman suitable for Lucas."

"That's easy," says Victor, "An inflatable sex doll." CENSORED.

Kate snickers, "You're so bad." Stefano joins them and interrupts the giggling. Victor tells him he's not welcome.

Phillip asks, "Why would I hurt your damn family? Nicole happens to be a friend of mine."

EJ says, "You need some new friends. She's too soft hearted and trusting. I've advised her to stay away from people who suck the life out of her. But she's still with me anyway. You stay away from her. I won't tell you again."

Brady says EJ can't tell Nicole who her friends are. Nicole reminds Brady she's lovestruck over EJ.

"You sound like a Stepford wife," snorts Brady, "Why are you cowering like this? What has he done to you?"

"Phillip knows we're keeping a secret from EJ," says Nicole, "He saw us together. He thinks we're having an affair and wants the Alternative Fuels Project back and so he's blackmailing me. So I persuaded EJ to give it up. The project is yours."

"Let me get this straight," says Brady, "Phillip is blackmailing you for something you didn't do. So he's either got to be the sharpest blackmailer in the world or you've got to be the dumbest victim ever. And since we all know Phillip is a few peas short of a casserole, I guess that answers it."

Nicole says, "You have to keep your distance."

Brady asks, "Does that mean that you cut me out of your life?"

Nicole says, "No. It means I didn't use my mouthwash this morning."

Phillip is skeptical, "I get the Alternative Fuels Project if I never speak to Nicole again? You don't choose my friends. I'm not afraid of you or any DiMera."

"Then you're a bigger fool than I thought," EJ closes the door.

Will tells Sami and Lucas he went to visit John and Marlena, "John is making progress, but that squint therapy is really tough." Lucas invites him to stay at the love shed with him and Chloe. Will doesn't seem too excited at that prospect, so Lucas suggest he could stay with his mom. Sami tells him to stay where he wants. We spend about a half hour on this earthshaking decision and Will finally decides on the townhouse over the Lucas-Chloe romper room.

Sami is beside herself, "Having you back is making me all crazy and emotional."

Lucas jumps in, "Don't blame yourself, Will. The sun coming up makes her all crazy and emotional." Sami announces she has to go pick up Johnny. Lucas wonders what's keeping Chloe.

Chloe tells Maggie about her sign from God. Maggie mocks, but agrees to keep her mouth shut, "I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for Lucas and the fact that it will be a bigger bombshell when I drop it later."

Brady wants to know why Nicole would allow Phillip to blackmail her when they are not sleeping together. "I'm paying it forward," says Nicole, "I'm sure at some point you'll jump into the sack with your old grandma." She insists she's happy and very close to getting everything she ever dreamed of. Brady tells her she has to think of her daughter too. Nicole insists she is.

Brady says, "It's not just Phillip, but you've got Dr. Baker to worry about. How many times are you going to let somebody put the screws to you to keep this a secret?"

Chloe delivers Allie to Sami. Sami promises never to leave her again. "I guess I'll just have to run away then," says Allie. Chloe tries to play nice, "Oh, I see you had your baby." That does it. Unstable Sami kicks her to the curb.

Sami slams the door on Chloe and flashes back to the time she took Grace to the dump... uh... convent and abandoned her. Another knock interrupts. Sami explodes, "WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?" She opens the door to find EJ.

Lucas and Will have a man-to man talk. Let me rephrase that. Lucas and Will have a father-son talk. Lucas asks about Will's love life.

"Well," says Will, "There was Heidi... and then there was Martina... and then..."

Lucas interrupts, "You're just like your old man."

"I know," says Will, "Women don't stay around long with me either. So, What wasn't that Mom didn't want me to know so bad? Why are you really in Salem Hospital?"

Lucas says, "Because there was no bed available in a good hospital."

Stefano says, "I will leave if Mr. Kiriakis is going to act like an ill mannered lout." Kate insists he stay and Stefano sits down. He and Victor argue about corporate espionage. Stefano suggests they focus on what they have in common, "Our devotion to family."

"I think I'm going to throw up," says Victor. A woman from the audience runs up onto stage and hands Victor one of the complimentary barf bags handed out at the beginning of each episode. Kate tries to referee.

Stefano asks about her health and Kate tells him about her miracle remission. Stefano beams, "This calls for a celebration! The drinks are on me."

Victor growls, "I'd rather put a nail in my eye." He leaves


Brady reaches through the TV screen and hands you a zapper. Use it whenever he and Nicole are on.

EJ tells Sami he is there to deliver the laughing penguin, "I can't imagine how you got Johnny to sleep without it. In fact, I'm thinking of picking one up for myself."

As the laughing penguin provides the only meaningful intelligence in the room, EJ tells Sami she can keep Johnny for a few more days. He assures her he will never shunt Johnny aside. Sami says she knows EJ is a good father, but it's Nicole she's worried about. EJ says Johnny missed his mother while she was away. We roll into a gooey mutual admiration society as the two gush over each other and exchange tender glances of longing.

Lucas fesses up, "I made a bad decision. I went out of the house without supervision." He tells Will about his drinking.

Will judges and lectures, "So the gas explosion was..."

"Right," says Lucas, "I lit a match to read the address on EJ's door and my breath ignited. I'm sorry I let you down and let myself down. I Hope you're not sorry you came home."

Victor returns to the mansion. Phillip shows him the Alternative Fuels Project plan. He says he got Nicole to work on it and the ball is back in the Kiriakis court. Victor wonders how this wound up in EJ's hands in the first place.

"Melanie," says Phillip.

Victor growls, "I know that... but how did she manage it? Find out or find a new job."

EJ and Sami share small talk. Allie cries and Sami runs in to check on her. EJ takes the opportunity to call Stefano, "Phillip Kiriakis took the bait."

Sami brings the kids out.

Nicole and Brady. Zzzzzaaaaappppp... Brady encourages her to leave EJ. Nicole don' wanna. "When they find out what you did," says Brady, "your whole little perfect life will go up in smoke."

Phillip is upset that he came through for Victor and Victor turned around and threatened to fire him. Victor thinks this is about Stephanie. Phillip tells him he and Stephanie are done. He rages and pours another drink.

Stefano turns on the charm, "Katharina, you always look beautiful, but tonight you have a certain aura."

"That's because I didn't shower after my workout," says Kate.

"And what about this doctor of yours," says Stefano, "How is that going?"

"Daniel and I are no longer seeing each other," says Kate.

"And," continues Stefano, "What about the guy with the nail in his eye?"

"I'm not seeing him either," says Kate, "I'm free right now."

"That's good news," says Stefano, "Because you used to be pretty expensive. what do you say we have dinner?"

Nicole says Brady is depressing her and scaring her. A gal in the audience turns to her neighbor, "Me, too. This is depressing me and I'm scared it will never end."

Brady says, "The person who loves EJ is some weird and submissive person and that's not the person you are." Brady says he knows she really is a good person.

Nicole thanks him and says she is trying to allow herself some happiness, "But that's hard when people want me to fail, like Sami who is back in town."

Sami and EJ share a bouncing baby family moment with the kids. EJ takes the kids in to bed. Sami calls Sister Teresa and tells her to kiss Grace goodnight. She says she's coming up with a plan.

Kate hesitates. Stefano says he's not proposing this time, "Just a quiet dinner." Kate says she will think about it.

Will says he isn't sorry he came home.


Chloe shows up. OK, now Will's sorry he came home. Chloe heads toward him for a big hug and Will backs off like a cornered dog. Chloe wonders what's got him so upset. Will explodes, "My dad almost died and you're the reason."

Chloe falls apart, "You're right. I'm such a horrible person for tying him down ad pouring all that alcohol down his throat."

Nicole tells Brady she saw Sami and it was awkward and horrible. Nicole thinks Sami's out to steal EJ. Brady asks why Nicole thinks that. "Because I don't think I'm worthy of EJ or anyone else," says Nicole.

Brady spews, "You don't look in the mirror and see how beautiful you are do you? You don't see you are smart or funny."

Nicole has a pity party, "You forgot about me bing the biggest screw up you've ever known."

"You've been unlucky," says Brady.

Nicole gets all gooey, "Except for having you as a friend." Smoochie. "Thank you," says Nicole, "for being the best friend I don't deserve."

Sami announces the kids are asleep. She asks why EJ is really there. He reminds her of the penguin delivery. Sami thinks it's more than that. She thinks if he were really happy at home he'd be there right now. She asks if maybe he's reconsidering getting married.

EJ ponders, "Maybe I shouldn't marry Nicole... What if I made her worst nightmare come true and married you?"

Out in the audience, a Lumi fan stands and screams, "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" She plunges a dagger into her heart. An usher runs down to her and checks her out, "CLEANUP ON AISLE SEVEN!" Mercifully, they had to stop the show at this point to mop up, so we'll pick up where things left off on Monday...

NOTE – you can now follow Prevuze on twitter at:

Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Somebody's Been Reading Cosmo

Sami comes into Lucas' hospital room and goes into her usual blithering and panicking routine. Lucas asks where her baby is, but with Sami, babies are a dime a dozen, so she refuses to answer his questions until he tells her what happened and why he is in the hospital.

Victor hears Phillip leave his sniveling suck-up message for Stephanie and accuses him of begging, "That's hardly attractive for a man. Throw her out on her ass."

Kate wants to have a little chat with Chloe. Guess what the subject is.

Hope arrives at the cop shop. She tells one of the nosy officers she's just there to deliver a file from a case she was working on. The officer is dumbfounded to discover she was actually working.

Nicole lectures and tells EJ if she leaves she will take Sydney with her. EJ calls her bluff, flings the door open and tells her to hit the road.

Lucas tells Sami about the gas explosion. He says he doesn't remember what he was doing at Daniel's apartment, because he was drunk.

Nicole turns on the waterworks and accuses EJ of not caring. EJ says he loves her and only asked her to leave because she keeps threatening him. Nicole tells him she has a hard time controlling her insecurities.

Phillip mocks Victor, "The advice about women just keeps on coming. At least I haven't lost count of the number of times I've been married."

Victor growls, "If you kowtow to Stephanie you'll lose her respect."

"I'm not towing to the cow," insists Phillip.

"Men do strange things for love," says Victor, "Look at Lucas."

"Lucas does strange things with or without love," says Phillip.

"He gave up years of sobriety for some airhead bitch who's only claim to fame is she can carry a tune," says Victor.

"Up until you said something about being able to carry a tune, I thought you were talking about Chloe," says Phillip, "I wish you'd lay off Chloe. I remember your statement at Christmas about 'everyone has marrow.' You probably thought that made sense."

"I always make sense," says Victor, "It's you who has your head up your a... if you want any woman make sure you maintain your position of power over her."

Kate flashes back to the face-suck-fest and thanks Chloe because she and Daniel saved her life, "I will never forget what you and Daniel did. It's seared into my memory."

Back to the bullring of Nicole's insecurity known as the DiMera mansion; EJ softens, "Ever since we first made love... I think we were meant to be together."

Sami can't believe Lucas fell off the wagon. She grills him about what made him start drinking, "It was Ghoul Girl, wasn't it? What did she do to you? I can't believe that bitch. Brady had to numb himself with drugs to live with her."

Lucas changes the subject, "The last time I saw you, you were pregnant. Obviously, you're not pregnant any more."

"What tipped you off," asks Sami.

"Well," says Lucas, "Your butt's still... uh... full figured, but your stomach looks a little smaller."

Bo thinks Hope used a lame excuse to come to the station, "You... doing work... that's ridiculous. I think you came here because you miss me."

"I do miss you," says Hope, "But we all know I'm a bad shot."

Chloe says, "I want to be with Lucas more than anything."

Kate drips with insincerity, "And why is that, Chloe?"

"Because Daniel isn't available right now."

Nicole tries to gather her thoughts. She uses a small container. EJ gets impatient with her moodiness. Nicole thinks he wants to reconnect with Sami.

Lucas asks about the baby. Sami gasps, "You mean you're supposed to keep them? Well, in this case, that wasn't a problem. The baby was stillborn."

Phillip runs into Stephanie at the pub. They share some small talk and Stephanie tells him, "I'm here to pick up some dinner for Mom and Dad."

Phillip is confused, "You mean invisible people still have to eat?"

"I got your message," says Stephanie, "I'm not sure what it meant. Do you still think we can overcome our differences?"

Phillip asks, "You mean the fact that I'm a rich, successful, young, upcoming business executive and war hero and you're a has-been race driver who's struggling to get through college, has clawed her way up to being a coffee-carting intern, has had her most meaningful relationship with her uncle and has slept with every gearhead from LeMans to Indianapolis?"

"That," says Stephanie, "Plus the fact that we can't even agree on Chez Rouge or Buddy's Burgers for dinner."

Chloe says she realizes more than ever that she loves Lucas, "But it's like the bumper sticker says, 'things happen.'"

Kate corrects her, "I believe the bumper sticker actually says, '&#)@$! happens.'"

"I'm not a great speller," says Chloe, "but I never realized DOOL is spelled '&#)@$!.'"

Kate wonders what those things are. Chloe evades and says all she wants is a future with Lucas. Kate tells her she is soooo happy to hear Chloe say that, "There is just one little thing I am wondering about... at the time of the explosion, what were you doing at Daniel's apartment?"


What do you know, Sami doesn't want to talk about her stillborn daughter. Lucas offers his condolences. Sami begs, "Please make sure that no one ever finds out that I was pregnant – especially EJ."

Nicole twiddles chess pieces as EJ rants because she is begrudging him being concerned with Sami and her kids. Nicole comes out of left field and says her feelings are bubbling to the surface because he tried to take on the Kiriakis family. She nukes and says she is scared because EJ won't protect her and their family, "I'm having nightmares about this."

"That's normal," says EJ, "Any dream about DOOL would be a nightmare."

Lucas promises not to tell anyone about the baby, but reminds her secrets have a way of coming out. Sami reminds him he can keep his big trap shut and things will be fine. Telling Lucas to keep his trap shut is like telling a black hole to stop sucking things in. Sami rants about Lucas' trip off the wagon and the slut he's engaged to. She advises him to wise up and get rid of her.

Chloe says, "I was just in Daniel's neighborhood and I saw Lucas go in and decided to follow him. Then when he left I would tell Daniel I just dropped in and ask to borrow a cup of afternoon delight."

Kate asks if Chloe has any idea what Lucas was doing there. Chloe bats her eyes, "None at all." Chloe promises she won't let Lucas get away from her.

Hope says she misses Bo, but that's not why she is there. Then she backpedals and says bringing that folder in really was an excuse, "I knew no one would believe I really was doing work. I said I needed to be on my own but haven't stopped loving you – and I also wouldn't want to have to take the garbage out myself."

Did you know that right now... yes right NOW, the moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter is aligned with Mars? You probably thought this signifies the dawning of the Age of Aquarius, but you would only be partially right. It's real significance is that the rarest of events occurs: Bo actually grows a pair. Mark the date.

Bo rants, "You say you love and miss me and you want me near you but you don't let me near you. You push me out of your life. What do you want me to feel here, sorry for you? Well I do feel sorry for you... and guilt-ridden and sympathetic and lonely as hell. This isn't what you wanted. You don't want me near you so why don't you have some sympathy for me get out of my sight? Not only will that make it more quiet around here, but maybe I can keep my lunch down."

Hope pouts, "You've never spoken to me like that before. I know that for sure because... you're still alive."

Hope turns to leave. The moon exits the seventh house and Jupiter gives Mars the big brush off. Life returns to normal. The real Bo comes back. Bo the eunuch, as we affectionately think of him. He rushes to the door, stops her from leaving and apologizes for sassing. Then Hope apologizes. Then we have several rounds of of apologizapalooza. "I know," says Hope, "You were just trying to protect me. I've hurt you very badly and I wasn't being compassionate."

Bo is near tears, "I wanted to (say it with him) be there for you and help you through this."

"I know," says Hope, "If you had just told me..."

Bo stops her and they decide not to go over it again. Together, they toss the dead horse out the window and fall into each other's arms. "I want to come home," whines Hope.

Phillip says, "When I left that message, I wasn't thinking."

"Happens a lot doesn't it," says Stephanie.

Phillip shrugs, "Couples fight. It's normal. They make up and they get past it."

"Somebody's been reading Cosmo, hasn't he," quips Stephanie.

"If there is anyone who can reform me," says Phillip, "that would be you. You wanna give it a shot?"

Kate tells Chloe this isn't a great time to see Lucas because of his recent near-stroke. Since she can't see Lucas, Chloe decides to go pick up Allie, "Do you know which bar she might be at?" She thanks Kate for putting aside their differences.

Kate wonders why she saved her life, "What was in it for you?"

Somewhere in your living room is a plastic rectangular device which we sometimes call a zapper. Nicole and EJ are on. Use it. Nicole thinks EJ is dismissing her feelings and that makes her think he doesn't love her. "Let me prove just how much I love you," says EJ.

"You mean you're finally going to shut up," asks Nicole.

The BoHopeconciliation continues. Bo wonders why the 180°. Hope says, "Sometimes you just suddenly see things clearly and sometimes the Prozac kicks in. I'm heading for Alice's and I'm going to tell Ciara we're going home."

Bo asks, "Who's going to watch Alice?"

Hope turns as she leaves, "There is one more thing. Something I need you to promise me."

EJ returns to the rumpus room with a sheet of paper, "This is proof I love you. It's the formula." He rips it up, being careful to tear it into really large pieces which would be so easy to put back together even Sydney could do it.

"I'm overjoyed," says Nicole, "more than you'll ever know."

Sami figures Chloe dumped Lucas like they all do and that's why he started drinking again. Lucas says anything bad in his life is because of Sami.

Chloe says there isn't anything or anyone she wouldn't do for Lucas. "I will take such pleasure in paying you back," says Kate. Translation: "I'll get you my pretty... and your little dog too!." Big hugs.

Stephanie says it's always been a fantasy of hers to reform a bad boy. Phillip smirks, "Face it, Stephanie, you wouldn't have me any other way. That would mean... I'll let you figure that out." He kisses her as he leaves and tells her to call.

Hope says she wants Bo to tell her about any more visions, no matter how frightening. Bo immediately has a vision, "I see us spending all the Days Of Our Lives together."

"Not that frightening," says Hope.

She leaves and Bo visualizes Hope having a hot time between the sheets, "WTH?"

Victor meets Kate at the pub and tells her he's thrilled about her remission. He senses something is wrong. Kate tells him Lucas and Chloe are getting back together. "Why would you be concerned about that," says Victor, "Aren't you the one who was possessed by aliens and brainwashed into thinking she's a saint?"

"I'm not at liberty to discuss it," says Kate, "but I found out Chloe isn't everything we thought she was."

"You mean she's even lower than a slut," asks Victor.

Kate says she hasn't told Lucas what she has found out. Victor licks his chops and offers to help, "Remember, revenge is a dish best served cold. It has to be done right."

Phillip meets Nicole. Nicole tells him, "Hold out your hands." Phillip complies and she gives him the pieces of the formula and says EJ is letting it go. Phillip congratulates her and says he will keep his mouth shut.

Nicole threatens, "If you cross me I will make sure you wish you were never a gleam in your daddy's eye."

Sami and Lucas argue about his drunken past and whether or not she's to blame. It gets ugly. Lucas accuses her of betraying will, "If you hadn't maybe things would be different right now. Will wouldn't be halfway around the world."

Speak of the devil, the aforementioned Will himself stands at the door to Lucas' room looking far less geeky than his former self, "OMG! Are you two still fighting over me?" Amazingly, Sami and Lucas recognize him.


NOTE – you can now follow Prevuze on twitter at:

Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Money-Grubbing Whore

Daniel and Chloe stand in the park and go round and round with all the things they've said to each other before. Daniel wants. Chloe doesn't want... but wants. She insists it's over. Daniel makes his case. Chloe cuts him short, "I'm gong to do my best to make it up to Lucas and be with him for all the Days Of Our Lives.

"I won't let this end," says Daniel.

A woman in the audience stands up and screams, "Oh for God's sake, kill it and put it and us out of our misery!" A couple of men in white coats come up, slap on the straight jacket and drag her out.

"It already has ended," says Chloe, "It's over. Forever. Goodbye. She gives him a smoochie and starts to leave. Daniel grabs her and sucks her in for more as Kate comes up and watches. Daniel slurps. Chloe gets into it and slurps back. They become one gooey mass as Kate continues to watch in horror. Apparently, Chloe's attention span is so short, forever really means five seconds.

Lucas tells Phillip he's decided he and Chloe are back on.

Rafe holds Grace and tells her about all of his rollicking good times with Sami in the safehouse. Grace wiggles and tries to escape, but Rafe is too strong. He tells her about hiding Sami's clothes when she took a shower. Grace accuses him of being a perv. "Except for being crazy," says Rafe, "Your mother has a heart of gold."

Sami gushes over Sydney. EJ offers to let her hold her. Nicole nukes and forbids it. EJ and Sami talk Nicole into it. EJ hands over the baby, but Sami would rather hold Sydney.

Suddenly, Nicole jumps the gun and wants Sydney back. She pries her out of Sami's arms and heads upstairs. Sami cries, "Why are you crying," asks EJ.

"It's Wednesday," blubbers Sami.

Lucas gets off the phone with Allie as Kate comes in. Kate says, "There's something that I need to tell you."

Lucas says, "There's something I have to tell you about Chloe."

Daniel the great surgeon continues to perform a tongue tonsillectomy on Chloe. Chloe begs him to let her go but Daniel insists they will be together. He says he won't let her go until she understands she is deluding herself and he will always be there waiting for her.

Nicole wonders if Sami can possibly know the truth.

EJ says, "It's me, Samantha. You can talk to me. Why are you so upset?"

Sami says, "It just hit me all at once how much I miss Johnny and Allie and... uh... that other guy we pawned off on Carrie and Austin." She's worried about Nicole taking her place with Johnny, "She's nothing but a gold digger."

Lucas tells Kate he's made a decision about his future. In spite of Kate's attempts to stop the runaway train known as Lucas mouth he tells her he's going to give Chloe another chance. Kate forbids it, "No, absolutely not!"

Chloe and Daniel continue to bicker as Phillip walks up. Things get really quiet. Phillip asks, "Am I interrupting something?"

Rafe plays peek-a-boo with Grace. Sister Teresa finds him and tells him he's very good with the kid. Rafe says with Sami gone he misses all the crying and so he came by to hear Grace wail for old times sake. He asks Sister Teresa not to tell Sami he was there.

EJ says he doesn't want Sami bad mouthing Nicole in his house. In that case, Sami suggests they step into the yard to continue the conversation. Sami says she doesn't thing Nicole is a physical threat to Johnny, but is an ethical threat, "She's a money-grubbing whore." Johnny runs in and we have the big reunion.

Johnny giggles and plays with his laughing penguin. We have a flashback to the exciting moment when Rafe brought it to Sami. Sami thanks EJ. For what we're not sure.

Sister Teresa wonders why Rafe wouldn't want Sami to know he was there. Rafe just thinks that's the best way to play it.

Phillip thanks Daniel for what he's done for his mom, "I really appreciate it. When Lucas gets out of the hospital, maybe you and Lucas and Brady and I can get together for a little 'I've done Chloe' party." Daniel leaves.

Phillip turns to Chloe, "When I visited him, Lucas had a lot to say – specifically about you."

Kate tells Lucas getting back with Chloe would be a huge mistake. She tries to tell him what she saw but Lucas mouth kicks in and a black hole of conversation forms. After what seems like hours of ranting, Lucas' machines explode. The crash team rushes in as Lucas writhes. They make Kate go outside. The head doctor administers an emergency dose of Clamupizone.

A doctor comes out into the hallway and tells Kate Lucas is under control. She tells Kate not to agitate him. Kate agrees to stick to small talk. Small brain, small talk.

Kate goes back in and tells Lucas she was just trying to protect him. Lucas wants to know what's up.

Phillip says Lucas talked about Chloe wanting to get back together with him. Phillip thinks Lucas will forgive her and make it work, "So don't screw it up this time."

"Believe me," says Chloe, "I won't screw up. Or Daniel either."

EJ sends Johnny packing. Sami says she was scared Johnny and Allie would forget about her. EJ tells her about showing Johnny Sami's picture every night as he went to bed. In spite of that, he didn't run away. Nicole stands and watches as EJ tells Sami Johnny loves her with all his heart. Nicole interrupts and announces Sydney is asleep. EJ gets a call and goes off to that never-never land everyone in Salem goes to for cell phone calls.

Sami and Nicole snipe at each other. Accusations fly, but the baby monitor squawks as Sydney starts crying. EJ comes back from cell phone limbo and runs up to check on her. Nicole rejects Sami's maternal advice and tells Sami to butt out. EJ walks in on the ensuing fracas and asks Nicole to do the daughter duties. Nicole leaves.

Sami snorts, "What a nut job!"

EJ scolds, "Samantha would you please stop that?"

Meanwhile, back at the Kiriakis mansion, Victor finds Phillip pouring a drink and asks where he has been. Victor thinks Phillip should have called because he was concerned about the Alternative Fuels Project. He wants to know why Melanie was meeting with EJ. Phillip lectures Victor for being concerned about business when Lucas could have died. "I already knew Lucas was OK," says Victor, "What was I supposed to do, sit around here waiting for updates? Phillip, where is your head?"

"Part of it," says Phillip, "is smeared across the Salem Raceway and the other part is somewhere on a battlefield in Iraq."

Victor growls, "Is this another thing Brady will have to clean up? I want details, not half-assed reassurances."

"I resent that," says Phillip, "When I give reassurances, they're fully-assed. This Alternative Fuels Project messed up my relationship with the best woman I have ever known."

Lucas presses about Kate's 180° on Chloe, "Why did you change your opinion of her all of a sudden?" Inquiring minds want to know. If Lucas had a mind, he'd want to know, too. Kate backs off and says she will respect his choices.

EJ wants Sami to stop her obsessive hatred of Nicole. Johnny comes back in. Sami bounces him around and announces Marlena said she could stay in the townhouse.

"Didn't she sell that when she went to Switzerland," asks EJ.

"Yes," says Sami, "That's why she doesn't care if I stay there."

EJ and Mary escort Johnny to the car. Sami hangs back and calls Sister Teresa. She asks how Grace is doing as Nicole listens. Sister Teresa assures her Grace is fine. Sami says she will be by to see her soon. Nicole slithers back upstairs.

EJ comes back and proudly announces he has buckled Johnny into his car seat. he tells Sami about Lucas little blow up. Sami panics but EJ assures her he's OK. Sami decides she has to go see Lucas and leaves. Nicole slinks aback down. She tells EJ she heard their conversation and accuses him of still being in love with Sami.

Sister Teresa tells Rafe both he and Sami have their share of secrets, "And I have a secret about the two of you."

"What's that," says Rafe. Viewers hang on the edge of their seats for this one.

Sister Teresa says she thinks they care for each other more than they are wiling to admit, "I think you would make an excellent match. She gives Rafe a picture of Sami and Grace and leaves Rafe to contemplate the possibilities.

Rafe asks, "Did you hear that, Grace. Sister Teresa thinks your mother and I would be a great match."

Phillip tells Victor he's talking about Stephanie, not Melanie, "When I took over Titan, I sold my soul."

"Does that count as losing another body part," asks Victor.

Lucas vows to make things work with Chloe. Kate agrees to stay out of it.

Daniel bumps into Chloe at the hospital and tells her he loves her and that will never change. We go right back to where we started this episode, so reread the first paragraph for details if you can stomach it, or if you've run out of Ipecac.


Phillip insists he's fine and doesn't need Victor's phony concern. Victor tries to soften things up a bit, "Phillip, I'm just looking out for you. I'm (say it with him) here for you if you need me."

Phillip gets sarcastic, "I'll jot that down on my PDA.

"Oh, for God's sake," says Victor, "Nobody uses those things any more."

Victor leaves. Phillip calls and leaves a message for Stephanie to call him, "We need to talk. I don't think we're done yet. Not by a long shot." The audience groans.

Candles flicker. Daniel walks into the chapel and sits in a pew. He whimpers, "You win."

God says, "You got that right. Don' be messin' with me."

Kate comes out into the hall and tells Chloe they need to have a little chat.

EJ rants about Nicole's accusations. Nicole tells him to go be with Sami but when Nicole leaves, Sydney will be with her.

Sami comes in to see Lucas. Lucas gasps as she comes into his room, "Sami! Are you back for good?"

"When I'm back," says Sami, "It's never good."

Lucas asks, "Where's your baby?"

"I just pop 'em," says Sami, "After that, they're on their own."

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Tuesday, February 24, 2009

The Mother And Child Reunion

Kate visits Lucas in his hospital room, "Do you feel all right?"

"I feel terrible."

"Well," says Kate, "you certainly must feel better than you look." Lucas curses demon booze.

Daniel and Chloe argue. Daniel says, "I don't want to go through this again."

A gal in the audience shouts, "NEITHER DO WE!"

Chloe insists it's over. Daniel says none of this makes sense. Chloe interrupts him and says it makes perfect sense to her.

Phillip accuses Brady of having an affair with Nicole Brady denies it.

EJ insists this isn't jealousy. He admits he doesn't like Brady, "He's always hopping around like an annoying gnat. And he's made you paranoid. "It wasn't Brady," says Nicole, "

EJ asks, "Who was it."

Nicole ignores the question, "All right. I won't see him anymore."

EJ closes in, "I love you, Nicole and I promise I will cherish you for all the Days Of Our Lives. That is, right up until I find out what you've done and kill you." Kissing ensues. Sydney cries and EJ picks her up, "Did we scare you sweetheart? I'm sorry, but the noise is over." Unfortunately that would take a mute button.

EJ walks off. Nicole whines, "What am I gonna do?"

Chloe and Daniel continue to argue. Chloe thinks they need some privacy. Daniel suggests the park. Chloe suggests they meet there later. Daniel says they have to go right now, "I'm not gonna let you out of my sight. Not until you understand I will never let you go."

"Or," says Chloe, "Until you really get to know me. They you'll drop me like a hot potato and run out screaming."

Nicole calls Phillip and tells her she couldn't talk EJ into backing off. Phillip threatens. Nicole begs. Phillip gets nasty, "I don't make threats I don't follow through on. You didn't do your part. Now you gotta pay the price."

Phillip hangs up and calls EJ. EJ resists talking to him. "You'll want to hear this," says Phillip, "I have something interesting to say."

"How can that be," asks EJ, "Did the show get new writers?"

Nicole frets and decides she has to go see Phillip. She lets a bunch of hungry wolves into the room, puts Sydney on the floor where they can get to her and heads for the hills. As Nicole opens the front door...


Phillip tells EJ, "I'm only going to say this one time..." EJ scolds him for using such a big number.

Kate tells Lucas about her good test results. Lucas explod... uh... beams with excitement for her. Kate tells him now that she's had her miracle cure, she can work on getting his life back in order. She'll do everything she can to get Chloe back in his life. Lucas hopes her test results were wrong.

Meanwhile, out in the park, Chloe tells Daniel the explosion changed everything.

Henderson interrupts as Phillip is about to spill the beans. He tells him about the Lucasplosion. Phillip hangs up on EJ and rushes out because it's impossible to talk on a cell phone while you're going somewhere.

Sami forces her way in, "Sami's back. She's here to stay."

Nicole asks, "What the hell are you doing here?"

Sami says, "I came to take my baby."


Nicole snorts, "Johnny is a little boy, not a baby. Learn to speak English. He's with Caroline. She took him to the petting zoo, and people are lined up for blocks to pet him." Nicole shifts gears, "Any changes in your life while you were in the witless protection program?"

Phillip asks, "So, you're here to see your mom?"

"No," says Stephanie, "Actually my dad and I are here to take her home."

"That's great," says Phillip, "But I don't see your dad."

"He's my imaginary dad now," says Stephanie, "You have to play like you see him. It's a lot cheaper than having an actor play his part."

"But his acting has improved," says Phillip.

Kate wonders why Chloe was at Daniel's apartment. "Wherever you've got noxious fumes flowing out of an opening," says Lucas, "is where you'll usually find Chloe's mouth."

Chloe tells Daniel Lucas was dead after the explosion. Daniel gives us a medical lecture and insists Lucas wasn't dead. Chloe tells Daniel about her prayer, "It brought Lucas back to life and now I have to keep my promise. And I'm changing careers and going on the road as a faith healer."

Sami insists the witless protection program was boring. "Sure," sighs Nicole, "If that's your story..." Sami asks about Nicole's pregnancy. Nicole tells her about Sydney.

"You don't look like you were never pregnant," says Sami.

"I have a high metabolism," says Nicole, "It offsets my low IQ." she gives Sami the once-over, "You seem to have packed on the pounds. What? You thought a bigger target would make it easier for the killer?" Nicole says she doesn't object that Sami came there for Johnny. Sami zones out and gives us her thousand-yard stare. Nicole asks, "Did I say something to upset you?"

Daniel insists Lucas wasn't dead and it wasn't Chloe's prayer that brought him back to life. Chloe says, "You know, I've never really believed in miracles. Not even disappearing scars. But now I do, so I have to give you up for Lent. I can't walk away from my second chance."

"I get it," says Daniel.

"Not any more," says Chloe.

Lucas doesn't know why either he or Chloe was at Daniel's apartment. Kate wonders why he started drinking. Lucas doesn't know that either, "I just wanted to be numb – my whole body, not just my brain. But it didn't work. Now the pain is worse because I still love her."

Phillip apologizes to Stephanie.

Sami and Nicole continue to argue. Nicole gloats about her situation in comparison to Sami's. Sami bets EJ will never marry her. Nicole says they have already set a date. EJ walks in on WW III. That stops Sami in her tracks. She gulps, "Hey, EJ."

EJ whispers, "Hey, Sami."

Stephanie wants to know what Phillip is sorry for. She tosses out a few things he's done to get him started. Phillip says he thought he could run a business into the ground the way he wanted and still have her. But now he knows she's worth everything, "I just wanna do right by you, Stephanie. You gotta know that."

Stephanie whines, "So you're asking me for another chance... again?"

Kate reminds Lucas there are other women out there who are capable of making a fool out of him. "Not like Chloe," says Lucas, "She's special. But I can't figure it out. She was here when I woke up and said she wanted to get back together."

Daniel thinks Chloe is suffering from guilt over Lucas. Chloe reminds him she has reason to feel guilty. Daniel says being with someone out of guilt is the worst possible reason to be together. Being with them out of lust is a different story.

EJ and Sami stand frozen. EJ comes on in and they stammer around each other. Sami brings up the wedding date, "Wow, are you really going to marry the bitch?"

"No," says EJ, "Pookie's not my type."

Chloe whines, "I made a promise to God."

Daniel snorts, "And I can just go to hell, is that it?"

"I love you and I don't know how I will ever stop," says Chloe, "but this is the way it has to be."

"There is a a way out," says Daniel, "I will tell Lucas and you will be off the hook."

Lucas says he isn't ready to decide about getting back with Chloe right now. He asks Kate's opinion. Kate thinks Chloe is very special and she will be forever grateful to her, "If you have a chance at love, think twice before you walk away."

"I have problems thinking once," says Lucas.

Phillip begs. Stephanie rejects. She leaves.

EJ separates Nicole and Sami. He says he wants Sami's coming home to mark a new beginning, "Can't we all just get along?"

Rodney King sticks his head into the room, "Hey, that's my line."

Sydney cries. Sami asks, "That's your baby?"

Lucas asks if Kate has thought about why she walked away from Daniel. She says she thought she wasn't going to be around long and didn't want to burden him. Phillip walks in, "Hey, I came to see my brother who got drunk and blew himself up! So, bro, do you need to borrow a body part? " Kate says her goodbyes and leaves. As she goes, Lucas suggests Kate find Daniel and show him how grateful she is to be in remission.

Chloe begs Daniel not to tell Lucas, "What we had is over and you have to accept that."

Daniel staggers, "This is really happening."

"It has to," says Chloe, "somehow."

"I don't mean us breaking up," says Daniel, "I'm talking about the bad dialog."

EJ says, "Yep, that's the newest addition to our household." He goes to feed the baby. Sami and Nicole go back to sniping at each other. Sami asks, "Why did you give her a boy's name?"

"It's not a boy's name," says Nicole, "Sydney is a city in Australia I want to visit someday."

"In that case," snipes Sami, "I wish you'd named her Siberia and then you could go there instead." Sami warns Nicole to keep a firm hold on Sydney, because she's with the DiMeras. Nicole says she's about to become a DiMera. Sami backs off and turns to leave. EJ walks up with Sydney.

Lucas tells Phillip he doesn't know why he was at Daniel's or why Chloe was there. Phillip wants to know what Lucas is going to do about his engagement with Chloe. Lucas says he isn't sure. Stephanie comes up and eavesdrops as the boys talk about love.

Daniel presses. Chloe stops him and says her betrayal was unforgivable but she will make it up to Lucas. Daniel refuses to believe it or let their affair end. It already has," says Chloe, "It's over. Forever."

Daniel asks, "Does that mean forever in real time or forever in DOOL time?" They kiss goodbye. Daniel turns it into a hot one as Kate comes up and watches the show.

Mother and Child Reunion plays in the background. Sami gushes over Sydney. EJ starts to pass her off and let Sami hold her. Nicole panics...


Apparently Nicole is concerned about cooties.

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Monday, February 23, 2009

The Clone

Nicole assures EJ she's not trying to interfere in his business as she continues to interfere. EJ wonders why she's so scared. Nicole flashes back to her conversation with Phillip and becomes evasive. EJ accuses her of lying.

Brady finds Phillip standing in the dark swilling booze at the Kiriakis mansion and accuses him of costing Titan a fortune.

Phillip denies it, "It's just cheap off-brand scotch."

Bo and Hope meet in the park. By complete coincidence, Ciara bumps into them while she is on her way from one biker bar to the next. Bo sucks up to Hope, who apologizes for being late. Ciara says something completely out of character; she wants to know when she can come home.

Rafe tells Sami they've arrested the guy who was feeding the killer information about her. Now they can pack up and go home.

Lucas bleeds. Chloe watches. Daniel comforts. The nurse calls. Daniel goes. Chloe snivels.

Chloe worries about that teeny little promise she made to God. Maggie rushes up to her all excited about the fact Lucas will be OK. Chloe apologizes to her, but Maggie says she didn't help matters because she blabbed to Lucas. Translation: the cat's out of the bag and Maggie doesn't have any more bombshells to drop. Maggie says she's sorry she caused all that trouble and will reform herself by going to start going to Mouthaholics Anonymous. Then they will all have a chance to make things right.

Kate catches up with Daniel, "What happened?"

Daniel says, "There was a gas explosion outside of my apartment."

Kate asks, "What the hell was Lucas doing at your apartment?"

Poor Nicole's feelings are hurt. EJ wants the truth. Nicole tells him she ran into Brady at the Cheatin' Heart. She says he told her about the war over the Alternative Fuels Project. EJ tells her it's game over, "That deal is done." He asks her to butt out of his business affairs. Nicole butts in, "I'm just scared, that's all."


EJ explodes and sends his drink glass flying across the room, "That SOB!"

"You're right," says Nicole, "Victor is a SOB."

"I'm talking about Brady," screams EJ.

"He's a former GSOB," says Nicole.


"Grand Son of a..."

Nicole defends Brady and says he was just warning her. She begs EJ to let the fight with the Kiriakis family go. EJ refuses.

Brady and Phillip argue. Brady tells Phillip about EJ being with Melanie. Brady asks, "What's going on? Tell me how deep the hole is that we are in."

"It's not a hole we're standing in," says Phillip. He hands Brady a shovel.

Chloe has decided all the pain is because of her. At least she's right about that. She's decided to be open about everything.

Hope tells Ciara she can go home and visit daddy anytime she wants. Bo wants to talk. Hope wants to pout and sulk. Bo sends Ciara to see the animals at the zoo, "Climb in and play with that nice big kitty who hasn't been fed yet."

Hope nukes. Bo snivels. She doesn't know if they ever will be able to get past this.

Sami is sooo thrilled she gets to see her kids, but she has to say goodbye to Grace. Lucky Grace. Sami says, "You don't seem too thrilled about gettin' out of here either. What's your problem?"

Rafe says, "You. But that one will be gone as soon as I get outta here."

Kate rushes up and she and Maggie share a hug. They decide everything is going to be hunky dory. Maggie drops the booze bomb, "Lucas went off the wagon. He was drunk."

"How do you know," asks Kate.

"He was starting to make sense when he talked," says Maggie.

Chloe asks for a moment alone with Lucas. Daniel leaves. Chloe sits and takes Lucas' hand, "I have so much to say, but can't put it into words."

"Thank God for small favors," says Lucas.

Unfortunately, Chloe finds an abundance of words, "I hurt you so much and all you did was love me. I will make it right. I'm ready now."

Lucas stirs, "Chloe?" She starts to go for the nurse but Lucas stops her, "Why am I in the hospital?"

Kate can't believe Lucas went over the edge. She wonders what made him do it. Maggie resists the urge to blab, "I think you should ask Daniel."

Lucas says he remembers being at the pub drinking. "You don't remember anything else," asks Chloe, "Drat the bad luck." She tells him the explosion was at Daniel's place.

"Why would I be there," asks Lucas.

EJ insists neither Nicole's safety or Sydney's safety were in jeopardy. He stomps off to make calls. Nicole screams like a stuck banshee, buries her face in her hands and drops to her knees. But it's not overacting. EJ comes back and tells her to think what a friend Brady isn't if he got her in this state. She rants about Victor and his threats. EJ claims Brady is manipulating her. Nicole insists the problem is Phillip, "Phillip is the clone of that old man! He is the one Victor will send to do his dirty work."

EJ decides there is no way to reason with her. "I thought you loved me," whimpers Nicole.

"You blackmail with tears," says EJ.

"Yeah," says Nicole, "Unlike Dr. Baker who wants money."

EJ orders, "Stay out of my business!"

Nicole snorts, "I will! And I will make sure Sydney stays out of it. I can't raise her with a man who doesn't care. If you don't stop this fight with the Kiriakis family, there won't be any wedding."


Bo and Hope use the same script they've always used before when Hope gets hinky about their marriage. Bo says he loves her. Hope says this isn't about love. It's about idiocy.

Rafe says he will miss Sami's whining. Sami claims she doesn't whine. Apparently, she's missed a whole lot of episodes. "And I won't miss the fact you made me watch football."

"Don't forget, though," says Rafe, "You're a Bears fan now."

"I know," says Sami, "At least I'll have SuperBowl Sunday free for many years to come."

Rafe starts to go. Sami panics, "Wait! Rafe!"

Chloe starts to tell Lucas why he was at Daniel's but the nurse conveeeeeniently interrupts for tests. Chloe walks out and looks to the heavens, "God, what are you trying to tell me now?"

Maggie sees Chloe and runs over to her, leaving Daniel and Kate to stammer around. Kate keeps asking, "Why was he at your apartment?"

"People do strange things when they are drunk," says Daniel

"Are you sure Lucas was drunk," asks Kate, "He doesn't need to be drunk to do strange things." Daniel decides this would be a good time to have a cup of brown water so he heads for the coffee machine.

Chloe tells Maggie Lucas doesn't remember, "It's not total amnesia. It's conveniently selective amnesia." Maggie tells her Lucas still needs to know everything and licks her chops at the thought of having another opportunity to drop the bomb on him.

"God has given me a second chance," says Chloe, "I'll do the right thing." Chloe goes back in, "Lucas, I need to tell you something..." she tells him she was wrong to break off their engagement and begs him to forgive her and take her back.

Brady tells Phillip to keep business out of his bedroom. Phillip tells him to worry about himself and the thing he has going on with Nicole.

EJ insists the wedding will go on as planned and tells her never to threaten to take his child,


Sydney cries. Nicole quivers, "Yes."

EJ calms down, "A threat as serious as this doesn't just pop up. What did Brady say?"

Nicole says he just warned her about the two families. EJ doesn't buy it. He digs. Nicole evades. EJ gets a call. He hangs up and tells Nicole it was the FBI, "Samantha is coming home."

Sami tries to stall things. Rafe says he doesn't like goodbyes, "I don't like tears."

"In that case," says Sami, "you should love saying goodbye to me. Am I ever going to see you again."

"Not if I play my cards right," says Rafe, "This is probably it." Suddenly, Rafe remembers something. He rushes into the next room, comes back out and gives her a Chicago Bears ball cap. Sami puts it on, vows to be a bears fan forever and we have the obligatory hugs and goodbyes.

Lucas just can't believe he and Chloe are back together, "I get blown up and get you back in the same day. I Hope disasters don't happen in threes." Chloe says she wants to get back together because what she did was wrong and God has given her another chance to screw up again, "I love you and I always will. Lucas gets woozy and Chloe leaves. On her way out, Kate bumps into her, "What are you doing in my son's room?"

Bo says he loves and needs Hope. He vows to do whatever it takes to make this right. "I need space," says Hope.

"You've got a lot of it between your ears," says Bo.

Ciara runs up and tells them to stop fighting.

Nicole is practically suicidal now that she's heard Sami is coming back. EJ doesn't want to talk about Sami. He wants to talk about Nicole's threat. He gets nasty and Nicole backs down. She promises to keep out of his business affairs. "One more thing," says EJ, "You are to stay way from Brady Black. He is out of your life."

Bo and Hope apologize to Ciara for fighting. Ciara wants to go. Hope agrees and they head out. Hope looks back as Bo agonizes.

Chloe and Daniel leave Kate with Lucas. Outside, Daniel says they need to put their relationship out in the open.

"No," says Chloe, "It's over."

"You mean our relationship," asks Daniel.

"Oh, heck no," says Chloe, "We'll drag that out forever. I mean this stupid episode is over."

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Friday, February 20, 2009

Girls Behaving Badly

Phillip listens as Nicole and Brady whisper about their little caper. Brady leaves and Phillip smirks, "This is gonna be a great day."

Melanie answers the door to find Stephanie standing there, "What do you want."


Melanie spews her evil laugh and makes threats.

Maggie rushes up and tells Daniel Lucas has been drinking and wonders if Daniel has seen him. Daniel wonders why he should have seen Lucas. Maggie fesses up that she told Lucas about Daniel's affair with Chloe. Daniel says, "All right, if he's not here then he... OMG! Chloe!"

Lucas the lush pounds and rambles on about Chloe and Daniel having an affair and laughing behind his back. Chloe heads for the door and...


She runs out into the hall and finds Lucas cold and dead.

Stephanie asks if Melanie hosed the table down before she started making her sandwich. Melanie arm locks Stephanie and taunts. EJ walks through the open door and orders Melanie to back off.

Nicole assures Sydney everything will be OK as she hears the doorbell. Phillip stands there saying he is there to see EJ but figured he wans there since Nicole was cavorting around the font yard with Brady. He invites himself in, "I'm just getting to the good part, honey."

EJ muses, "Well, well, well. Girls behaving badly." He asks Stephanie to leave so she can conduct business with Melanie. Melanie and Stephanie toss a few final catty remarks at each other as Stephanie leaves. EJ tells Melanie she is about to become wealthy and doesn't need a lawsuit on her hands. He has two contracts for her. Melanie doesn't want to sign, "I have to think about this."

"The time for thinking is over," says EJ, "That's why the two of us are involved in this transaction instead of someone competent." Melanie is reluctant. "You don't play games with me," threatens EJ, "Not unless you wish to lose... I believe the expression is... 'big-time.'"

Melanie says, "So I guess a lot of people in Salem play games with you. That could explain why there are so many losers around here."

Phillip wonders what Nicole and Brady are hiding. Nicole insists she and Brady are just friends. Phillip digs for info.

Daniel calls Chloe and gets no answer. Chloe searches for a cell phone. She finds Lucas' phone but it, like Lucas, is dead. She forgets about a phone and starts CPR on Lucas, "Don't die now!"

EJ advises Melanie she's playing in the big leagues. He walks her over to the table where he has the contracts laid out, "Sign here, here and here, where the yellow sticky flags are. You know, the guy who invented those things made millions. I wonder what you'll do when you make your fortune." Melanie is still reluctant, but EJ intimidates her and insists she sign. Melanie signs and tells EJ she's still afraid of Phillip. EJ assures her the DiMeras will watch over her if she cooperates, "On the flip side if you fail to cooperate we will forcefully remind you of this agreement." She gives him the other half of the formula. EJ tucks it away. Melanie asks for her money.

Phillip threatens to go to EJ and tell him about Brady. Nicole says there is nothing to tell. Phillip wonders what Brady meant when he told her he would never tell EJ. Nicole says she asked Brady to promise not to tell EJ what she did to Chloe. Phillip doesn't buy it. Nicole sneers, "You don't know anything. You've got bupkis."

"I've got EJ with all the DiMera ruthlessness," says Phillip, "If I tell him something is going on he won't stop until he finds out. Phillip starts to call. Nicole grabs the phone.

Chloe panics and blithers. She finds her phone and makes the emergency call, "He's not breathing! He has no pulse! There's no brain activity, but with him that's normal."

"Ma'am," says the attendant, "Did you want to give us the address we're supposed to come to?"

Chloe hags up and prays for God to bring Lucas back from the dead.

Stephanie sits on a park bench and bawls. Brady finds her and, of course, butts in. He figures this is about Phillip. She tells him Melanie and she had a fight and Phillip told her in front of Melanie he didn't want her. Brady agrees Phillip is a jerk. Stephanie agrees that she's an idiot. She takes off.

Brady gasps, "Wow, Phillip you screwed up big-time."

Meanwhile, Phillip continues to pester Nicole, "EJ has been a bit of a problem."

Nicole asks, "Did he outfox you already?"

Phillip says, "And you, Nicole, are going to help make it go away."

Chloe completely falls apart. Lucas hasn't been breathing for fifteen minutes. If it were anyone else, he'd be brain dead by now, but with Lucas, it doesn't matter. Chloe wails and makes a deal with God, "If you bring him back to life I'll give up Daniel and be the mother Lucas' children need."

Lucas staggers in, "Chloe..."

Chloe is shocked. "What did you expect," asks God, "I sure didn't want him and he's too dumb to send to hell."

Daniel heads for home. Maggie continues her lecture as he leaves.


Melanie counts her money. EJ tells her Phillip will be really upset about this, so EJ and Stefano will keep a close eye on things. Melanie rants about men, "They push you around and after they get what they want, they get all protective. It's like leaving an extra $20 on the nightstand, you know. It's a man's world. I accept it. Doesn't mean I have to like it." She fans the money she's holding, "I think I should buy a safe deposit box. Do you think they come in pink?"

Melanie goes upstairs. EJ turns to walk out and mumbles, "Sydney, I'm not letting you out of the house until you're 40." He bumps into Brady on the way out.

Nicole insists she doesn't meddle in EJ's business. "Yeah," says Phillip, "you just sit by the fire and knit." He wonders what will happen to all the love and trust she has built up if EJ finds she is hiding something.

"I won't betray EJ," says Nicole, "Or at least anything in comparison to what I've done wouldn't count as betrayal."

"It seems you already have betrayed him," says Phillip.

Lucas staggers. Chloe begs him to stay in there. Daniel rushes in, "What the hell happened?"

"With all that alcohol on my breath," says Lucas, "I knew I shouldn't have lit a match."

We hear that familiar sound of sirens in the background arriving way too late to be of any real help.

EJ and Brady trade wisecracks. EJ tells him it's none of his business why he's there. He leaves and Melanie comes down. Brady wants to talk about the Alternative Fuels Project. Melanie doesn't want to, "Phillip is messing with people's heads and he will pay for it."

"If it's your head he's messing with," says Brady, "At least the price will be low."

The paramedics wheel Lucas out. Chloe snivels and bawls. Daniel tells Chloe Lucas knows about their affair. "I know that," says Chloe, "When he stood at the door screaming about it at the top of his lungs, that's what tipped me off." Daniel says he'll deal with all of this mess since Chloe has been through so much. Poor widdle Chloe. Daniel reiterates his love for her. He moves in for some post-catastrophe smooching.

Daniel says he doesn't think it would be a good idea for Chloe to show up at the hospital. He leaves, but Chloe vows not to hide any more.

Phillip brings up Melanie, "If you can't get EJ to back off I will tell him everything I saw. He surveys the DiMera mansion and Sydney. You have certainly got a lot here. You will succeed or it's all gone, baby, gone." He leaves, "Call me."

Stephanie is at the pub. She calls and leaves a message for Chelsea. Melanie bumps into her and tries to smooth things over. She tells her nothing happened between her and Phillip.

"Oooo," mocks Stephanie, "I'm so glad you're being honest with me. Let's be BFF's."

Melanie whimpers, "You can hate me if you want."

"Glad I have your permission," snorts Stephanie.

They wheel Lucas into the ER and Maggie panics. She accuses Daniel of beating him up. Chloe walks in and Daniel has a cow when he sees her. Chloe says she isn't hiding any more. She refuses to leave as Daniel goes to check on Lucas.

Maggie gloms onto Chloe for details. Suddenly, Chloe remembers her pact with the Lord, "I made a promise but He can't keep me to it!"

Maggie asks, "Who is he?" Inquiring minds want to know. Maggie wants to know whether she has an inquiring mind or not.

Nicole tells Sydney she's doing all this for her and her daddy. EJ walks in. Nicole says she was telling Sydney about men and how awful they are, except for her daddy. Daddy says he's terrified of Sydney growing up given his meeting with some girl. Nicole guesses it's Melanie. EJ tells her he just bested the Kiriakis family.

Nicole gasps, "Did you make them angry?"

"Angry," asks EJ, "That would be a crude understatement." Nicole begs him not to cross them.

Phillip arrives back at the Kiriakis mansion and finds Stephanie sitting silently and steaming, kind of like Mother in Psycho. Stephanie says Melanie told her it was all a big show when Phillip seemed interested in her, "I'm here to say goodbye."

"Just like I predicted," says Phillip, "It's a good day."

A nurse comes to get Maggie and tells him she can visit Lucas. "Which room is he in," asks Maggie.

"That depends on which part of him you want to visit," says the nurse.

As she leaves, Maggie tells Chloe to sit down, "You don't look well. You should see a doctor."

"That's what caused this mess in the first place," says Chloe.

Chloe sits and wonders if her contract with God has any loopholes.

Daniel comes out, "It's the damnedest thing I've ever seen. He has alcohol poisoning, but that's it. It's like the explosion never happened. It's as close to a miracle as I've ever seen." They call Daniel away.

Chloe realizes she has her answer, "Now I know what I have to do."

Stephanie says she thinks Phillip would sell his soul to close a business deal. She can't be with someone who would do that. Phillip protests, "I love you."

"That's what makes the so sad," says Stephanie, "That and the unbelievable idiocy of this plot."

Nicole urges EJ to let Titan win this one. She says she's doing this to protect their family. EJ wonders what's going on.

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Thursday, February 19, 2009

Servicing The Client

Little lost Chloe stands in the snow. She sits and prays, "Oh God..."

God says, "The last time I heard you say that you were with Daniel and you screamed it."

Chloe continues, "I don't know if I'm doing this right. If you're there, send me sign."

Maggie tries to bring drunken Lucas back to earth, "Lucas, please, you're not in your right mind!"

"Better make the best of it," says Lucas, "this is the only one I've got." Maggie tries to grab his phone but he gets it away from her. He and Daniel dial Chloe at the same time.

Chloe looks at the caller ID, "OMG, there is my sign!" She picks up and Daniel tells her he needs to talk.

Lucas the lush apologizes for dialing the wrong number. Maggie tries in vain to get him to think rationally. "How can I," he slurs, "when I know the truth? In vino veritas!"

"Don't you mean in doolo crapitas," asks Maggie. Lucas says he just can't wait to tell Chloe what a lying slut she really is.

Brady finds Nicole at the pub going through wedding magazines. Sydney babbles. Brady sits and Nicole babbles. She tells him she talked to Dr. Baker, "He seems to think that you're in love with me."

Stefano's in a good mood. He finds EJ in the rumpus room. EJ says he really enjoys sticking it to people. He tells Stephanie he has the sales contract for the Alternative Fuels Project and plans to get Kiriakis, "Melanie's young, but she's a pretty sharp businesswoman."

"Too bad I can't say the same thing for you," says Stefano.

EJ is crushed, "You mean you don't think I'm a very good businesswoman? "

Phillip and Melanie slurp it up on each other. Stephanie stands outside the door and watches. Melanie looks up and sees Stephanie soaking in the show, and puts her act into overdrive.

Daniel asks Chloe to meet him at his place.

Brady rants about Baker. He goes so far off the deep end in denial, Nicole thinks that must mean Baker is right.

Stephanie practically pukes. She rushes in and gives Phillip both barrels, "You complete bastard!"

Lucas wants to go find Chloe. Maggie won't let him drive. Lucas thinks (I use the term loosely) Maggie is to blame for Chloe having her affair.

Chloe arrives at Daniel's apartment. Suddenly, loud sirens go off. Chloe jumps and asks what it is. "The apartment is equipped with a bad drama warning system," says Daniel, "Funny thing, it goes off around here all the time."

Melanie enjoys the show as Stephanie rakes Phillip over the coals. Then Stephanie turns and takes her wrath out on Melanie, "When they say 'get a room,' they don't mean the kitchen. Melanie, if you weren't such a self-obsessed moron, you'd know that wasn't passion just now. It's just how a Kiriakis does business."

Brady mocks Nicole. Nicole reminds him he even took on Victor for her. She spews her gratitude. Brady goes over the top and tells her how much he pines for her, "I will watch you from afar, heartbroken, and hope for a passing glance." Suddenly, he backs off, "Actually, Nicole, I do love you."

Nicole is flabbergasted. She tires to bring lovestruck Brady down softly. She tells him she loves EJ and he has to accept that. Brady says he knows she did all the dreadful and deceitful things she did for EJ, "And I do love you, but I'm not IN love with you. Too bad you're still in love with me, though."

EJ can't believe Stefano doesn't think he can take care of a little girl with dollar signs in her eyes. Stefano waxes philosophically, "Melanie isn't greedy, she is needy, and there is a big difference."

EJ is a little confused, "What does she need?"

"A personality transplant," says Stefano, "It's like when the high school girl wants the football team quarterback, so she starts dating the class valedictorian to get the quarterback's attention. The minute she tells Phillip she has that contract he will do anything and, believe me, she wants more than a contract."

Stephanie is on a roll, "This man is willing to do anything, and I mean anything, to get that Alternative Fuels Project. Talk about servicing the client."

Phillip bellows, "Shut up, Stephanie!" He turns to Melanie, "She's lying." Melanie tells Stephanie to toddle home and work on her macramé.

Stephanie says says she will go, but not until Phillip makes a choice, "What will it be, Phillip, her or me."

"Isn't there something behind curtain #3," asks Phillip.

The maintenance man finishes the repair and leaves as we watch the unconnected gas pipes seep. Funny, isn't it, how the alarm worked before, but now it doesn't? Just asking.

Daniel tells Chloe Kate's cancer is in remission. He thinks that was the last legitimate reason to keep their relationship a secret, and wonders if she's having second thoughts about him.

"No," says Chloe, "I usually wait until later in the relationship to chuck a guy like yesterday's garbage."

Lucas slurs and threatens. He accuses Maggie of getting Chloe and Daniel together. Maggie nukes, "Well, nothing goes with a binge like a big plate of self pity. Lucas goes for another round. The irresponsible bartender pours him one. He tells Maggie to leave and stop ruining his good time. Suddenly, Maggie steps up to the bar and orders a glass 12 year old scotch. Lucas gasps, "Twelve year old! Just think, that scotch was being made the year you went on social security."

EJ asks, "So which am I, the valedictorian or the captain of the football team."

It was a bad analogy," says Stefano, "Phillip obviously is the football player and with your brain, you'd be lucky to graduate."

"But," protests EJ, "Phillip only has one leg. How can he be a football player?"

"Two words," says Stefano, "Detroit Lions.
Believe me, Phillip is the one Melanie wants."

EJ says, "Nobody is going to sign that contract."

Stefano asks, "How can you be so sure?"

EJ says, "If she crosses us, there is no happy ending for her."

Backed into a corner, Phillip chooses Melanie, "You can't choose who you fall in love with." Stephanie storms out and stands outside hyperventilating.

Lucas begs Maggie not to drink, "I know you're messin' with me.' Maggie lectures Lucas for forgetting about Allie and Will. Lucas snorts, "My children would be better off without me!"


Maggie sends Lucas drink flying across the room, "Don't ever say that to me again!"

Daniel rationalizes about their relationship. Chloe tells him about her day, "I had a walk in the park. It wasn't exactly a walk in the park. I prayed for a sign from God, and then you called. I figured that was almost as good as tablets of stone. I know I'm supposed to be with you." Hugs and moans.

The Brady/Nicole love-fest continues. Now it's Nicole's turn to deny loving him. She finally figures he's making fun of her. Nicole tells him she's developed a conscience. She apologizes for running out when he gave her the money and leaving him to fend for himself with Victor. She says she hopes he can stay clean and sober. She also says she couldn't live with herself if he screws things up with Victor. Brady tells her she doesn't need to worry about that.

Melanie says she didn't see that coming, "She didn't give you a lot of wiggle room." She tells Phillip she won't hold him to what he said.

Phillip gets closer and says it might be a good thing Stephanie showed up and made him choose, "I've had a thing for you ever since I met you. I fought it like hell..."

"I know. I was there."

"I can't get you out of my head," says Phillip. They fall into each other's arms.

Maggie continues her lecture. Lucas turns his wrath to Daniel and vows he won't get away with this. He tells Maggie he doesn't feel so good. Maggie offers to take him home. Lucas puts his head down on the table. Maggie thanks God he passed out and leaves to get her car. Crafty Lucas looks up and chuckles.

A phone interrupts the festivities at the Chloe-Daniel buffet. Daniel says he has to go but wants Chloe to wait there for him, "Soon it will be like a fresh start." Daniel leaves. We pan in on the leaky gas pipe.

Nicole wonders if Brady thinks she's seen the last of Dr. Baker. Brady tells her blackmail is hard to get rid of. She says she's considered killing him. Brady thinks telling EJ the truth is a better idea.

Chelsea jogs through the park and catches up with Stephanie. Stephanie embellishes the story of her visit to Maggie's house, "I walked up to the door and they were on the kitchen table. He got up off of Melanie and told me we were through. I don't think I'll ever feel the same about Maggie's New Year's buffet. Chelsea offers to find Phillip and kill him.

Phillip suggests going someplace more private. Melanie sees through his little game, "If only this whole thing wasn't one big fat lie. Stephanie's an idiot but I'm not."

Stefano advises EJ that he shouldn't have intimidated Melanie. EJ assures Stefano he will close the deal. Stefano brings up the sensitive issue of the pre-nup again

Phillip stammers and backpedals. Melanie thinks Phillip's passion ignited only after she was working with EJ. She gives him her snotty little smile, "Don't trip on your way out." Phillip walks out vowing not to lose.

Stephanie bawls and pours her heart out to Chelsea, "It was my own personal screening of the Postman Always Rings Twice. I'm not going to be the stupid Stephanie any more." She hustles off to do something stupid.

Chelsea makes a face, "The kitchen table?"

Maggie rushes back in to the Cheatin' Heart and finds Lucas missing. She figures he's ducked out on her and the race Is on.

Lucas runs up to Daniel's door and threatens to huff and puff and blow it down. Chloe frets inside.

Melanie rants as she mimics Phillip's tender words, "Oh, Melanie, your hair... your eyes... your Alternative Fuels Project..." A knock interrupts. Melanie rushes to the door and gasps, "Phillip!"

Stephanie stands there and throws a roundhouse right, "Bitch!"


Melanie chuckles.

Stefano and EJ are at the pub. EJ rants about the pre-nup. He insists he's marrying Nicole for love. Stefano says, "So you don't have a thing to worry about. You just keep telling yourself that."

Nicole and Brady arrive back at the mansion with Sydney. She begs Brady to tell her everything will be OK.

Brady obliges, "It will all be OK and EJ will never know what you did." Phillip watches.

Maggie arrives at the hospital, and asks Daniel if he has seen Lucas.

Lucas screams, rants, pounds and makes every accusation in the book, "I know what's going on! Come out here and face me you S..." Chloe walks toward the door...



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Late Posting 02/19/09

We'll be posting Prevuze late this morning. We went out drinking with Lucas last night and, as you know, he's fresh off the wagon. Man, can that guy put 'em down. We couldn't keep up, but we tried. Anyway, we'll try to recover and have the blog up again in a couple of hours.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Here's Your Sign...

EJ and Phillip stand at the DiMera mansion's door and bicker. Phillip tells EJ he's delusional if he thinks he'll let Melanie take the project away.

Maggie learns Lucas is boozing it up and rushes for the phone.

Lucas the sot drinks and contemplates the ring as he gets Maggie's call. Bombed on a half Bloody Mary, he decides not to answer.

Father Methuselah counsels Chloe. Chloe decides she's a greedy spoiled little child. With Lucas, she misses the passion and the excitement and, of course, Daniel, "What is wrong with me father?"

"Explaining things like that," says the father, "is what eternity is for."

Kate thinks the bad news Daniel is about to dump on her is her test results. Daniel hyperventilates.

Lucas drinks. He gets chummy with the bartender. They talk about divorce as Lucas gets plastered, "Keep 'em coming."

Chloe tells the priest, "You came for a nice little stroll in the park and a crazy woman ruins your day." Father M wants her whole story. She tells him about the bone marrow transplant, Kate, Daniel, Kate AND Daniel, Daniel's groping examination and their resulting monkey sex. She says she knows if Lucas found out it would destroy him.

Abe and Theo join Lexie at the hospital. Theo shows her a drawing of a house. It's all happy-happy as Daddy says he has to leave for work. Theo wants Daddy to stay.

Chelsea meets Stephanie at the docks. She says she wants Stephanie to know she and Max kissed. "He's just the most affectionate uncle on earth, isn't he," asks Stephanie.

Phillip rants, "If you so much as sniff in the direction of the Alternative Fuels Project I will..." EJ interrupts and tells Phillip he can't scare him. Tony interrupts EJ's interruption and tells them they are both out of their minds. Tony is becoming pretty perceptive in his old age.

Speaking of being out of your mind, Loserclueless rambles and guzzles. He's switched to deadly see-throughs, "A power greater than myself will help me restore my sanity."

"A used 9-volt battery is a power greater than yourself," says Pete the bartender.

Maggie has told Melanie about Lucas' drinking problem. Melanie says she had no idea, "If I had known he was a drunk..."

"DON'T YOU DARE CALL HIM THAT!," screams Maggie, "HE'S SOBRIETY CHALLENGED! Don't you know when a person gets drunk he loses millions of brain cells? The only thing that's saving Lucas is he doesn't have any more to lose." Melanie asks why Lucas fell off the wagon. Maggie says she knows but won't say. She heads to rescue the lush.

Father M tells Chloe she merely fell in love. He validates her Daniel romp and practically marries them by proxy on the spot. He compares her finding a soul mate to his devotion to the Lord.

God rolls his eyes, "Now I've heard everything."

Daniel stammers around as a nurse comes up and gives him an envelope. Daniel opens it and says it's instant perspective. He announces that Kate is in remission. Joy and hugs ensue.

Tony lectures EJ and Phillip for trying to pit their families against each other. EJ continues to accuse Phillip of being attracted to Melanie. Phillip grabs EJ's lapel and threatens to run him out of town. EJ accuses Phillip of being arrogant for firing Melanie and then expecting her to do business with him. He tells Phillip to leave.

After Phillip stomps off, Tony says, "You have a lot to learn, little brother."

"I doubt it," says EJ, "My brain has reached it's capacity."

Kate bounces off the walls with happiness. She decides she has a newfound hope. She says she has vowed to embrace life if she got a second chance. Instead she embraces Daniel.

Father M counsels Chloe to follow her heart. She isn't sure she believes God can answer her prayers. Father M suggests she put Him to the test.

Lucas wobbles into the Cheatin' Heart and orders a double vodka. The bartender says, "I thought you were on the wagon."

Lucas isn't in the mood for preaching, "I thought you were a bartender, not a social worker."

He picks up his drink and starts to swill it, but Maggie grabs it from him, "What the hell do you think you're doing? Aren't you going to offer to buy me one, too? "

Abe volunteers to take Theo to his appointment. Lexie whines, "Abe, we don't have to just cave in and give him what he wants."

"That's why he likes you so much," says Abe.

"I feel like a failure," says Lexie.

That's normal," says Abe, "when you are one."

Stephanie tells Chelsea she and Max are done. Chelsea reminds Stephanie she said she would have a problem if Chelsea and Max got back together. Stephanie insists she is happy for both of them. Chelsea asks about Phillip. "It's kind of a Tidy Bowl relationship," says Stephanie.

"What does that mean," asks Chelsea.

"In the toilet."

Chelsea says Stephanie, "I just don't want you to give up on him yet, 'cause I know he really, really likes you. And, of course, now I'm going to fight to the death to keep you away from Max. You need to lay down the law, throw down the gauntlet."

Phillip arrives at Maggie's house to talk to Melanie. Melanie asks, "Why are you here?"

Phillip steps up to the Melanie buffet, "For this..."

Kate proceeds to enjoy life all over Daniel. She's all hot to get back together. Daniel's all cool about it. Kate wants. Daniel backpedals. He shoos Kate off to tell her kids the good news.

Chloe says she's rusty with the prayer thing. Father M encourages her to practice on him. Chloe launches into it, "God, I love two men. One of them because he gives me security. The other because he actually knows what he's doing in bed. What should I do? Which man should I be with."

That was a very fine prayer," says Father M, "I approve."

"You'll never be a bishop," says God.

Maggie snorts and lectures. Lucas sasses and rants about his wife not-to-be, "What did she do, Maggie, my ex-fiancée, si'l vous plait? tell me. I can handle it."

Maggie says, "Chloe is having an affair."

"Barkeep," screams Lucas, "Martini! Triple!"

Tony and EJ continue to argue about DiMera enterprises. EJ claims Tony hasn't had much of an impact on the company. Tony explodes, "You may be Stefano's latest yes man but I will not have you dismiss my latest contribution to DiMera enterprises." EJ accuses him of overreacting. Tony yells, "You're about to start a war with the Kiriakis family. You regard that as nothing?"

"You can accuse me of starting a war," says EJ, "But whatever you do, don't call it a vendetta."

"I think if father found out what you were up to," says Tony, "he'd fire your arrogant ass."

Stephanie decides to go read the riot act to Phillip. She reiterates that she is happy for Chelsea and her uncle.

Melanie is a little shocked at Phillip's behavior. Phillip says he has fought it like crazy but he can't get rid of his feelings for her. Phillip munches away, "You and I are alike in so many ways."

"You mean everyone wants you to leave town, too," asks Melanie.

Chelsea discovers the Carvers at the hospital and volunteers to take Theo to his session. Theo points at Abe and Lexie and says, "Family."

"Don't get too excited about that," warns Chelsea, "So were the Sopranos."

Tony tells EJ to back off. EJ says, "You want me to relax while you twirl your guns like a corporate cowboy?" EJ reminds Tony he is the chosen one and has complete confidence in what he is doing, as does Stefano, "Don't forget... I am the golden child." He leaves.

Tony chuckles, "Golden child? You are a damn fool and you are playing with fire."

Phillip slows things down, "Are you having second thoughts?"

"I'm incapable of a first thought," says Melanie, "But, no, I'm not having second thoughts." Phillip moves in for another sample as Stephanie walks up to the door and soaks it all in.


Daniel ponders, "Now that she's in remission, it's time to break the news to her and Lucas."

It seems however, Lucas already has that news bulletin. He asks, "Having an affair? You mean like having sex with someone?"

"No," says Maggie, "She joined a knitting group."

Lucas screams, "Who is she doing?"

"Daniel," says Maggie, "Chloe is seeing Daniel behind your back. All of him."

Lucas nukes, "HOLY... He's a dead man! I'm gonna kill that dude!"

"I'm glad to see prison really reformed you," says Maggie.

The father says he'll pray for Chloe. He leaves. Chloe prays, for real this time, "God, if you're there and listening, please send me a sign."

Lucas drinks and rants. In the exciting type of action you only find on DOOL, he and Daniel dial their phones simultaneously.

Chloe gets her call. Chloe looks at the caller ID, "Oh dear God, there's my sign."

Bill Engvall walks up to her and hands her one, "No, darlin', Here's your sign..."

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Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I'm A Slut – There, I Said It

Melanie meets EJ, who chastises her for being late. "I'm not a morning person," says Melanie.

"I figured that," says EJ, "In order to be a morning person you have to be a person, which means you have to be human."

Melanie says she's there to seal the deal. "I don't know," says EJ, "You've been consorting with the Kiriakis family."

Phillip rushes around. He's off to work but Victor asks him to stay for breakfast. Phillip says he is worried about the Kaiser account. Victor says Brady already convinced them to sign.

Daniel calls Chloe. Avert your eyes. It could be phone sex. She tells him she ended things with Lucas but he doesn't know the truth. Daniel announces after Kate's big exam today they may be able to leave Salem together tonight, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Daniel hangs up and turns to find Kate. Chloe turns to find Lucas and Allie. Stares abound.

Allie runs up to see Chloe. Lucas tries to pry her away and says they have to go.

Melanie tells EJ she's not sure how much Phillip knows about their deal, "He found the money in my purse, but I handled it like a pro."

EJ gets his best laugh of the day, "You are not a pro."

"I know exactly what I am doing," says Melanie. EJ tells her the DiMera scientists are working round the clock on the half-formula and it's no time at all until they crack the code, "You are completely disposable."

A gal in the audience stands up and shouts, "So dispose of her!" Her neighbor pulls her back into her seat and she apologizes for causing a ruckus, "Sorry, I just couldn't control myself."

Phillip sulks and reminds Victor the Kaiser account was his. He struts around and rants at Brady for stealing it. Victor whoas him up, "I think Brady handled things well. He's spent a lot of time in Europe and knew how to communicate wit him. They responded to his demeanor."

"Yeah," sneers Phillip, "He gives great demeanor." Victor asks about the Alternative Fuels Project. Phillip blows up and says it's handled.

Victor says, "I asked Brady to step in and see if he could do some PR with Melanie Layton."

Phillip asks, "PR?"

"Panama Red," says Victor, "If we can get them busted smoking drugs, we'd have to sacrifice Brady, but it would be worth it to get Melanie out of our hair."

"Nobody understands what makes her tick like I do," says Phillip.

"That's what worries me."

Daniel and Kate share an uncomfortable moment. Kate says if the news on these tests is good, it's all because of him. Hugs. Maggie The Mouth walks up and soaks it in.

Since Lucas can't pry Allie away he decides to let her stay. Then he shoos her off to play in traffic. He tells Chloe he doesn't want Allie anywhere near her. Lucas wants to know why she broke it off with him, "I want to know why. Or who."

Melanie gives EJ her fakey stupid smile, "I'd have to be nuts to mess with a DiMera."

EJ is starting to worry me. He's been showing a lot of perception lately. He continues his winning streak with, "You are nuts. For Phillip as far as I can tell."

Melanie says she is over Phillip and his stupid little dimples. Melanie tells EJ, "I get it – I have to prove my loyalty to you. So, I'll do anything. Really. Anything."

EJ asks, "Does that include leaving town?"

Phillip and Victor argue about the Alternative Fuels Project. Phillip asks for just one more chance. King Victor grants it, "But one mistake and Melanie won't be the only one looking for a new job." Victor walks off. Phillip scowls.

Maggie walks in on the dannygrannyfest. She asks if Lucas told Kate why Chloe broke off the engagement. Kate dunno. She says she still has hopes the wedding will go through. Kate walks off and Daniel becomes the object of Maggie's wrath.

Chloe blubbers, "Just tell me how much you hate me."

Lucas says, "I can't, because I sill love you."

Chloe says, "I still love you, too."

EJ fondles Melanie's cheek. He gets dangerously close to fondling other things, "I admire you, Melanie, but always remember... When you wage war... there are always casualties." He gives her a little cheek slap and walks off.

Nervous Melanie calls out, "OK, uh... EJ, you've won the war. Just show me where to sign."

EJ looks back, "We'll see."

Phillip and Brady bicker. Brady says he has no interest in working with Melanie. Sarcastic Phillip says, "My spirits are soaring now." Kate interrupts. Brady takes off. Kate Phillip him the test results aren't in but she's trying to maintain a positive attitude. Phillip hugs, "Once you get those good results, you can start a new life again."

"Right," says Kate, "I'll be back walking the streets in no time."

Maggie rants and lectures, "What Chloe is in love with is the excitement of doing something forbidden. She barely knows you. That girl is in for a rude awakening."

Chloe says if she could change things she would.


Lucas says he has had it with the clichés and stomps off. Chloe collapses in tears onto the park bench. Father Methuselah walks up, "Are you all right, dear?"

EJ meets Brady outside of the pub. They banter about Nicole and the wedding. EJ tells Brady he's not on the guest list. Brady is sorry about that, "I wanted to watch Nicole make the biggest mistake of her life by marrying a DiMera."

EJ reminds Brady he's a DiMera, "And Father does not take kindly to family members who are traitors."

Victor joins Kate and Phillip who are planning a trip together with Lucas. Phillip takes off. Kate senses something is going on between the two of them. Victor says Phillip screwed up and he called him on it. Kate says if she gets good news she's going to make things right for her sons.

Lucas bellies up to the bar at the pub. He eyes the booze.

Father Methuselah asks Chloe if she wants to talk. Chloe bawls, "I've done a terrible thing, Father."

"Did you have an impure thought," asks the Father.

"No," says Chloe, "An impure life."

Lucas orders a bloody Mary. Melanie recognizes him.

EJ and Brady wrap things up as Phillip spies. He walks up to Brady, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Victor tells Kate to cut her sons some slack. Kate zones out, "I wish I knew what happened with Chloe."

Victor comes up with a few choice words, "She's a two-bit tramp who sweeps through men like a tornado." Kate defends Chloe. She decides to intervene and make things right between Chloe and Lucas.

Daniel tells Maggie to butt out. It's all in vain since Maggie's butt is too big for anyone to take on.

I'm not Catholic," says Chloe, "My soul is beyond saving."

The compassionate Father says, "That's never the case, my child."

God jumps in, "You don't know her."

Chloe gives the priest her life story, "I'm a slut. There – I said it."

Kate reminds Victor Chloe risked her life for her. Kate says she knows Victor is a good man, but a crummudgeon. She says she distanced herself from Daniel because she didn't want him to go through with her what he did with his wife, but she still cares for him and will tell him.

Daniel tells Maggie he and Chloe won't be ashamed for what they have done. Maggie brings her wrath down on him and reminds him he will have to tell Kate, "Hell hath no fury like Kate Roberts scorned."

Chloe tells the priest about her "two men." Father Methuselah sees Chloe is conflicted. Chloe thinks she deserves to wind up alone.

Melanie introduces herself. Lucas tells her he's busy. Melanie notices he's sitting there alone. She looks around and wrinkles her brow, "Uh... yeah... I can see you're really busy. Look, I'd like you to give me some advice."

Lucas grumbles, "Floss before you go to bed."

"Wow," beams Melanie, "Move over Jerry Seinfeld." Lucas says he wants to be left alone. Melanie goes off and sees Brady and Phillip talking outside.

Brady and Uncle Phillip continue to argue. Phillip stomps off.

Lucas contemplates his bloody Mary, "Don't do it Lucas." He decides to call Maggie, and then takes Chloe's ring out and looks at it. Flashback to the deringification. That does it. Lucas falls off the wagon.

Maggie pops pills as Melanie comes into the kitchen. Maggie sees her come in and takes a double dose. Melanie tells her about meeting the infamous Lucas.

Maggie asks, "Did he seem OK?"

"No," says Melanie, "He bugged me out a little and shooed me off and ordered a bloody Mary." Maggie chokes and heads for her phone. As fast as the town gossip works, we can't be sure if she's calling Lucas or the ladies in her bridge club.

Kate runs into Daniel at the hospital. She invites him out to get a drink and suggests maybe after that they could go to his place. Daniel's lack of excitement is overwhelming, "There is something I need to tell you."

Kate thinks he's about to give her bad news about the test results. "That's it," says Daniel, "I tested positive for Chloe cooties."

Father Methuselah cheers Chloe up. He advises her, "I think I know exactly what you need to do."

Phillip pounds on the door of the DiMera mansion and shouts, "EJ answer the door!" EJ answers and Phillip explodes, "You SOB, you're using Melanie to steal the Alternative Fuels Project. It's over DiMera. We're going to settle this right here, right now."


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