Friday, December 04, 2009

Shoot First And Ask Questions Later

Hope and Ciara bustle around together outside. Hope tells her what a great present she has chosen for Daddy's Christmas.

"I think it's great, too," says Ciara, "None of my dollies are life-size."

"We've got to find a good place to hide it, though," says Hope.

Ciara chirps, "Daddy said for all he cared I could hide it up your..."

"Ciara," says Hope, "How many times have I told you about that? You know you can't go up in the attic."

Ciara decides she wants to hide it under her real bed in her real home.

"You can't," says Hope, "Someone is staying there right now."

Bo joins the party, "No. Daddy's the only one at home."

Carly tells Melanie she's moving in. Melanie jabs, "Well, in that case Maggie better increase her homeowners insurance."

Mia comes in and we have the trifecta of uncomfortable moments. Carly says if Mia doesn’t want her there she will go. Melanie butts in and says she thinks that's a good idea, "Maggie thinks she can fix the problems of the Middle East with Horton donuts, but we're talking about reality here. You should go."

Brady is on the phone telling Arianna they found Nicole and she's in the hospital, "We don't know what happened. She's unconscious and doesn’t have Sydney with her."

Refe tries to help Sami hold things together. The Robinsons give their condolences to Sami and Rafe, "We'll pray for you." They leave. Rafe says he has to go check a few things out.

Sami stands alone, "Well, I'm not praying, I'm going to do something."

EJ badgers Nicole, "Where is my daughter?" Nicole says she doesn't know and breaks down.

Nicole babbles. EJ accuses. Nicole babbles. EJ rants. Nicole babbles. EJ gets nasty. Sami comes in and tries to defend Nicole. EJ wants none of it. He turns to Nicole, "I am gonna kill you. Do you understand?"

Sami yells, "EJ!"

Nicole hyperventilates.

A nurse comes in and throws EJ out. EJ refuses to go but Sami pushes him toward the door. Nicole goes off the deep end.

Bo tries to guess his Christmas present, "I think it's a watermelon."

"No," says Ciara, "With your head, you don't need another melon."

Bo sends her to see Santa and put money in his kettle. Hope kind of objects but scoots her off. Hope sits on the bench with Bo, who goes into semi-grovel mode and says he should have asked first if it was OK for Ciara to see Santa.

"I overreacted," admits Hope.

"I wasn't too worried," says Bo, "I had one hand on my gun."

Ciara runs back and Hope tells her they can go home.

Mia stammers. She says it's not up to the two of them whether Carly can move in, "I don't even know you and you know everything about me."

"And my moving in would make you uncomfortable," guesses Carly, "Whatever you share with me is nothing to be embarrassed about." Melanie accuses Carly of laying it on thick. Maggie comes in and breaks up the party. Carly tells her it looks like she won't be staying there.

Brady tells Arianna about his vacation in Cleveland. A cop interrupts, "Mr. Black, there is something I have to talk to you about."

Brady cups his hand over the phone, "Sure, what is it?"

Arianna doesn't realize he's off the phone and in tried and true DOOL tradition, she pours her heart out to him. She tells him how much she cares and hopes she hasn't screwed things up so they can fix it. Silence. Arianna whines, "Now would be a great time to say something, Brady."

The nurse wants to give Nicole a sedative. EJ doesn't want that. He starts badgering her again and grabs her throat. The astute nurse decides this would be a good time to go for help. Nicole begs, "I don't know what happened, EJ. You have to find her."

Melanie tells Maggie they have all decided they are not compatible. Maggie moderates. Melanie tells Carly she'll be happy somewhere else and leaves. Maggie tells Carly that Melanie doesn't make the rules there. Carly decides she'd better leave anyway. Mia says she has a headache and heads for her room.

Arianna whines, "Brady... say something."

Brady gets back on the phone, "Sorry... I gotta go."

"OK," whimpers Arianna, "Fine." He hangs up. "So much for the direct approach," says Arianna.

Sami tries to pull EJ the maniac back from the edge of the cliff. She orders Nicole to calm down. Nicole says she doesn't remember what happened. She says she was calling to say she was sorry, "I was on the pay phone but I'm not sure... I had this sense that something... someone was behind me and then I... thought I saw something but before I could turn there was this blast of pain and then nothing."

"A blast of pain and then nothing," says EJ, "That sounds like what happens when you're watching DOOL and the electricity goes out." He accuses her of lying.

Rafe finds Stefano in the waiting room, "What the hell are you doing here?" Stefano says it should be obvious. Rafe decides it's a good time to pick a fight, "The last person EJ and Sami need to see is the person who lied to them for Nicole's sake."

Stefano ain' goin' nowhere, "I don't answer to bores like you." Rafe wonders why Stefano backed Nicole instead of his son. Stefano suggests, "It's not a good idea to leave Elvis alone with Nicole, he has a bit of a temper."

The doc comes in and throws EJ out. Sami follows. Out in the waiting area they continue to argue. EJ vows Nicole won't get away with it this time.

Bo and Hope arrive home. Bo tells Ciara the Christmas tree will be there this afternoon. Hope sends her to hide Daddy's present. Bo and Hope share a tough moment. Hope says she knows Ciara wants things to be just like they used to be, "She wants us all to be here together just like always... Ciara in her bed... me in our bed... and you in the doghouse."

Maggie and Carly talk about Mia. Maggie thinks Mia is embarrassed not just about having her baby but because she felt close to Carly, "And Melanie... well, her style is to shoot first and asks questions later." Carly thinks Melanie was sticking up for Mia and says she likes that about her.

Rafe says he's concerned because it seemed Nicole may have been ready to come back to Salem just before all this happened.

"It seemed she gave birth to Sydney," says Stefano, "So things aren't always what they seem."

"We need Nicole to talk and trust us," says Rafe, "EJ won't let that happen so you have to muzzle your son."

EJ continues to rant. He thinks Nicole may know who has Sydney, "This was planned. She knows exactly what she is doing."

"If you are right," says Sami, "you screaming at her won't help. We have to get her to calm down. Go in there and tell her you believe her."

"She won't buy that."

"OK," says Sami, "I'll do it." EJ thinks that won't work either. Brady walks up.

Melanie and Arianna are together at the pub. Melanie picks up on Arianna's bad mood. "Why are you so glum? At least Brady called."

"I called him."

Melanie grasps at straws, "At least he answered."

Arianna says she hates Nicole for what she did and is peeved that Brady thinks she is the victim, "I'm beginning to think he'll never see Nicole for what she really is."

Brady says Nicole would never do anything to hurt Sydney. Sami wonders if Nicole was working with someone. Brady thinks that's coming from EJ and not Sami. He continues to defend Nicole as Sami asks for his help.

Brady assures her he will help, "I'm (say it with him) here for you."

Stefano says Elvis isn't ready to take advice from him. He hopes in time he will, though. He accuses Rafe of being cynical about reconciliation. Rafe doesn't quite get what Stefano means by that. Stefano draws him a picture, "After all the acrimony, look how close Samantha and Elvis are now. Have you thought about what will happen when they get their little girl back? Don't you think they will try to make a family for her and Giovanni? I can see the Christmas cards now. Just the four of them."

"Car 54? This is dispatch. We need you to respond to a riot at the Salem Hippodrome. It seems a group of crazed women calling themselves the 'Ejamis' have gone completely berserk after some guy named Stefano DiMera said something about a woman named Samantha and his son Elvis getting back together. You're going to need full riot gear, mace and straight jackets. We understand you will have help when you get there from a couple of other groups called the 'Safes' and 'Lumis.' The leaders of those groups have offered to do anything they can to... in their words, 'shut those screaming bitches up.'"

Rafe says it's true that someone could make that argument, "That won't happen because EJ is as big of a jerk as you are."

"You truly are obnoxious," says Stefano.

"No way," says Rafe, "I can't be anything that has four syllables in it."

"That word only has three syllables," says Stefano.


"For me, that was close enough," says Rafe, "Stay away from Sami." He leaves.

Brady decides to go talk to Nicole. He leaves and EJ reminds Sami Nicole has had Brady wrapped around her little finger for the better part of a year.

Rafe comes back and says someone is waiting for EJ. "Whom would that be," asks EJ.

"I'd rather not spoil the surprise."

EJ leaves and Sami tells Rafe Brady is in with Nicole, "Who is waiting for EJ?"

"Trust me," says Rafe, You don't want to know."

EJ finds Stefano and tells him if he wants to help he should leave.

Nicole sees Brady, "You."

"Me." Well, now we have the basics out of the way.

"You hate me," says Nicole, "Everyone hates me."

"You need someone on your side," says Brady, "That would be me. You have made mistakes. Me too."

"They gave me something that makes me sleepy," she slurs, "Every time I close my eyes I hear Sydney crying. She's probably so scared."

Sydney stares, "I'm scared... I'm scared... I'm scared this bus isn't going to get me away from those idiots fast enough."

"It's because of Sydney that everyone is trying to figure out what's going on and that's why you need to help," says Brady, "You need to tell me everything. I mean everything."

"You think I did this," says Nicole, "Just like EJ does." Three-two-one BLAST OFF! "Blubber-blubber=blubber-blubber-blubber."

Bo comes back and says Ciara wants to stay a little longer. Hope the magnificent OK's it. She says she feels like a guest in her own house, "This isn't easy. I know it looks like I'm the bad guy."

"I don't look at it that way," says Bo, "This is about the two of us."

"It's more complicated now."

"Carly is gone now."

"Memories linger," says Hope.

"Unfortunately," says Bo, "so does your attitude."

Hope thinks it would be a step in the right direction if Bo told her the truth.

Carly leaves. Mia comes back in, "You hate me, don't you?"

"No," says Maggie, "I don't."

Mia says she just can't deal with Carly. Maggie hugs her and tells her it's OK. Carly watches from the window and then leaves.

Stefano tries to smooth things over with EJ. EJ rejects him and tells him to leave.

Arianna says she is afraid Nicole will use Brady again and he won't see that she's pulling the wool over his eyes. Melanie tells her she's talked about Brady long enough and now it's time to go into action.

Nicole insists she doesn't know what happened at the bus station.

Bo and Hope hug. Bo wonders why Hope can't accept there is something he can't tell her. Hope reminds him, "We're partners."

"Well partner," says Bo, "You're the one who moved out." Oh, no. Blatant sass could earn Bo weeks of sleeping out with Fido.

The doorbell rings. Hope says, "I'll get that and pretend this is still my house."

Bo keeps it up, "You're the one who walked out."

AAK! DOUBLE SASS!

Bo is really on thin ice. Hope gives him the proverbial look that would kill and points at him. OMG! A dirty look and a point! Double-sass has consequences more sinister than some of the atrocities committed by the Spanish Inquisition.

Hope opens the door...

CARLY!

Melanie tells Arianna "He who hesitates is lost." She leaves.

"Arianna says, "I think she is right. She calls and asks for the number for Touch This Guy airlines.

Brady agrees to help Nicole. He kisses her and leaves. Nicole is near delirium, "Oh, my baby... my baby needs to be safe."

Brady comes back into the waiting area and says Nicole is sleeping. He says he doesn't think Nicole knows anything about Sydney and then goes to make some calls.

"So who has Sydney," asks Sami.

"I know," says EJ. Stefano walks in. He accuses, "It's you. You have our daughter!"

Sydney gets impatient and yells at the bus driver, "Hey, mister, can't you pedal this thing any faster?"

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9 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

Hope tells her what a great present she has chosen for Daddy's Christmas.

"I think it's great, too," says Ciara, "None of my dollies are life-size."

“Bo and the Real Girl” – LOL!!!!!!

"Maggie thinks she can fix the problems of the Middle East with Horton donuts, but we're talking about reality here.”

Exactly what part of DOOL has anything to do with reality?

Rafe decides it's a good time to pick a fight, "The last person EJ and Sami need to see is the person who lied to them for Nicole's sake."

What an asinine statement to make. Rafe should be asking Stefano what he had to do with Sydney’s disappearance. Instead he decides to be argumentative.

Stefano ain' goin' nowhere, "I don't answer to bores like you."

Apparently the writers are actually aware that they have created a character that has the same affect on the viewers as a gross of Ambien.

"You truly are obnoxious," says Stefano.

"No way," says Rafe, "I can't be anything that has four syllables in it."

"That word only has three syllables," says Stefano.

"For me, that was close enough," says Rafe.

Tears of laughter are puddling on my desk, and the finish is taking a real beating because of it. At least I can be thankful that wood doesn’t short out.

Sydney stares, "I'm scared... I'm scared... I'm scared this bus isn't going to get me away from those idiots fast enough."

You got me started again Prevuze. Clean up on aisle 3!!!!!

"You're the one who moved out." Oh, no. Blatant sass could earn Bo weeks of sleeping out with Fido.

Fido? I thought Bo’s wife’s name was Hope.

On a scale of 1 to 10, this addition of Prevuze is a 576!!!!! Talk about hysterical, and I haven’t even gotten to the outrageously funny censored link or the Ejami/Safe/Lumi riot! TGIF and TGFP!!!!!!

5:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

TGIF & TGFP! :)

Well......I was gonna leave it at that, but as I looked down for the word verification - and I am not making this up - I see 'lumis'!

Now, if word verification is as fair as Prevuze we should get an Ejami (& Safe) too. Right?

5:52 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Did anyone else notice in yesterday's when Maggie picked up the picture of her and the Mickster it was OldMickey and not NuMickey? I thought that was odd if they ever wanted Kevin Dobson back. I'm guessing Mickey will just be on the road from here on out.

In typical DOOL fashion we will soon have practically every Salemite in Cleveland. Arianna is on her way. Can Gabi, Pard, Abe, Lucas and Kate be far behind?

I'm so glad Lucas is back - he provides such good Prevuze material. HAHAHA Great censored link!!

I loved "Memories linger," says Hope. "Unfortunately," says Bo, "So does your attitude." So true.

The best Prevuism for me, tho, was "A blast of pain and then nothing," says EJ, "That sounds like what happens when you're watching DOOL and the electricity goes out." It's clear you can feel our pain, Prevuze, and we feel yours, too.

Thanks for getting us to Friday. And it's cold but sunny. TGIP, TGIF everyone.

7:35 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Yes, Bulldog, I did notice it was the "old" Mickey (not the ORIGINAL Mickey, but the middle Mickey) and not Dobson. Unfortunately for Kevin, we've seen him so seldom I didn't even think of the inconsistency until you just mentioned it. In fact, when I first saw the hilarious Prevuze picture today of Dobson my first reaction was, "Who the heck is that?" HAHAHA

Funniest item for me was the censored link. OMG it was great. Also mention-worthy were the Hippodrome scenario, a syllabic-challenged Rafe, and the jet ejector seat.

My HUH?! moment was Melanie getting all up in Carly's face. The woman accidentally bumps into Mel ONCE and all of a sudden she's public enemy #1? What's with that?

Finally, does anyone else see a sinister pattern evolving? Two days ago Rafe has a "frinkin' headache". One day ago Sami woke up with a "terrible headache". Today Mia goes upstairs with a headache. Has the mutated virus, H3N3BT* struck Salem?

My word verification, brane. That could be used so many ways, but I'll go with...Anyone with any branes reads Prevuze instead of suffering through DOOL.

TGIF, TGIP!

*H3N3BT (3 Headaches? No, 3 Brain Tumors)

8:32 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Bulldog said...
Did anyone else notice in yesterday's when Maggie picked up the picture of her and the Mickster it was OldMickey and not NuMickey? I thought that was odd if they ever wanted Kevin Dobson back. I'm guessing Mickey will just be on the road from here on out.

I'm thinking that the bus that just missed running over Nicole is about to make a speed bump out of Mickey. In order to give us flashbacks ad nauseum, the viewers have to be reminded what the Mickster looked like back in the day.

8:36 AM  
Blogger Klaus said...

I was sick all week. I think DOOL weakens immune systems.

Maggie's Home for Wayward Women. All they need is Nicole and Stephanie. Make it happen writers.

"Now would be a great time to say something, Brady."
A *click* would have infinitely been more funny.

Sami tries to pull EJ the maniac back from the edge of the cliff. She orders Nicole to calm down.
Oh God, Why is Sami the most rational and calm person in the room!?

"I'm beginning to think he'll never see Nicole for what she really is."
If everyone in town could everyone else for what they were, Salem would be a ghost town.

He leaves and EJ reminds Sami Nicole has had Brady wrapped around her little finger for the better part of a year.
Says the guy who couldn't see past the fake pregnancy.

"This isn't easy. I know it looks like I'm the bad guy."
Well yes, you are.

"I don't look at it that way," says Bo,
Shush you! Don't undermine me.

Hope opens the door...

CARLY!

Salem is full of rich people, rich people that just have spare a 50 grand laying about. I'm sure Carly could easily acquire it and stay elsewhere. And is Bo the only person she left town on good terms with.

The woman accidentally bumps into Mel ONCE and all of a sudden she's public enemy #1
So the rule of thumb is not to bump into Melanie, not that you should anyway. This is more of an incentive.

My word verification is *blegr,* which is an excellent description for how I felt two days ago.

9:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, I am confused about the Carly/daughter storyline...If they make Melanie Carly and Bo's daughter then that would mean Melanie slept with her half uncle Phillip...ew. How old is Carly's son? Does this storyline even have any shred of believability? Oh, I forgot this is Days, they don't worry about the facts :)

12:36 PM  
Anonymous Berg said...

"Car 54? This is dispatch. We need you to respond to a riot at the Salem Hippodrome. It seems a group of crazed women calling themselves the 'Ejamis' have gone completely berserk after some guy named Stefano DiMera said something about a woman named Samantha and his son Elvis getting back together. You're going to need full riot gear, mace and straight jackets. We understand you will have help when you get there from a couple of other groups called the 'Safes' and 'Lumis.' The leaders of those groups have offered to do anything they can to... in their words, 'shut those screaming bitches up.'"

Funniest freakin thing I have read in awhile.

2:19 PM  
Anonymous Maggie Mae said...

anonymous, Rumor has it that Melanie is the daughter of Carly and Dr. Dan.

Melanie flipping out after bumping into Carly seems to confirm that suspision. Why else would she get upset with a woman she doesn't know but we'll soon find out is her mother?

3:00 PM  

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