Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Hooters

Melanie joins Phillip and Stephanie at the pub, "Hi guys! Guess what! I have some newsworthy news!"

"Great," says Stephanie, "Did you finally get that bus ticket to Canada?"

"Oh, look," chirps Melanie, "It makes jokes, too." She tells them Nick fixed his alternative fuel project. Then she drops the bomb, "Nick signed the project over to me and now you would be a fool to ignore me, Phillip."

"I guess that means I'll be ignoring you," says Phillip.

Bo is on the phone with Hope. Hope nags and rags. Bo finally manages to get away from her and hangs up the phone.

"SCREAM!"

"CIARA!"


Chelsea strolls down at the pier with Theo. They step over a couple of drunks in the gutter and walk down the steps. See sees Max standing at the edge of the dock contemplating the water, "Max, are you OK?"

Max says, "I was until you showed up."

Stefano is on the phone trying to reenlist Dr. Heisman's services. EJ walks into the rumpus room and tells him to hang up.

Nicole meets Daniel at the hospital. Daniel lectures her about prenatal care for Junior-Junior #1, "You're already here and I've got some time, so why don't I check you out right now?"

Nicole asks, "Can we wait until I get inside your office to take off my clothes? "

Melanie squeaks as she tells Phillip and Stephanie about Nick's decision to hand his project over to her. Phillip is skeptical. Melanie 'splains, "Don't be such a buzz-kill. This is exciting news!"

"It doesn't sound very exciting to me," says Stephanie.

Melanie clears her throat, "Is that any way to talk to your superior?" Melanie rattles off a string of demands she wants taken care of once she starts her new position at Titan, "I think we should axe the intern program. You're stuck with me, Phillip."

Phillip growls, "I don't get stuck. You are out on your ass!"

Abe arrives at Bo and Hope's house and, as usual, wants to know what's going on. Bo says he's just feeling cooped up. Abe thinks there is more to it than that. He presses.

EJ walks over and hangs up the phone as Stefano continues to talk. Stefano blows his stack, "This is my house and my phone and I'll talk on it if I want to!" He hurls the phone across the room.

"I guess nobody will be talking on it now," says EJ, "You're being a bully. We've already told you Nicole doesn't want to see Dr. Heisman and that's the way it's going to be. I trust Nicole to know what is best for my child. If you want a part in its life treat us with respect."

Nicole tells Daniel she has already found a doctor who is monitoring her pregnancy, "He's a miracle worker. No offense."

"None taken," says Daniel, "So who is he? I have to give him your medical records." Nicole convinces him she can take her records to her new miracle worker doctor herself. Daniel goes for the records. Nicole breathes a sigh of relief.

Melanie says it's fine if Phillip wants her to take her goldmine elsewhere. Phillip wonders how she manipulated Nick. Melanie claims she didn't. Phillip decides to go see Nick, expose Melanie for the liar she is and change Nick's mind. He stomps out. Melanie and Stephanie exchange looks that could kill.

Chelsea and Max share an uncomfortable moment. She says she was taking Theo to the Salem Place tree lighting and decided Theo would like to walk through the seedy part of town to get there. She invites Max to come with them, but everything grinds to a halt when she sees the box Trent left him sitting on a post. "I was debating whether or not to set Charlie free," says Max. He says he can't keep Charlie because it reminds him of Trent.

"You need to do whatever gives you peace of mind," says Chelsea.

"If I had a mind I'd do that," says Max.

Bo tells Abe about his new psychic talent. He says he heard screaming earlier, checked on Ciara and it wasn't her.

Melanie walks through the Titan hallway with Stephanie following. Melanie barks orders about changing the decor of the place. Stephanie tells her all this is meaningless because it will be over for her when Phillip returns from his visit with Nick.

"Oh," snipes Melanie, "Listen to you. All this is coming from an intern caught making out with her boss."

Stephanie yells, "I DID NOT MAKE OUT WITH PHILLIP."

"Why don't you say it a little louder," asks Melanie, "I don't think they heard you down in accounting."

Stephanie is stunned, "Titan has an accounting department?"

She and Melanie continue to bicker over who is the gold-digger. Melanie snaps, "Look at the way you dress. I think you should apply for a job at Hooters."

"No can do," says Stephanie, "I show a lot more than the Hooters girls."

They haul Nick out to see Phillip. Nick says he knows why Phillip is there. Phillip tells him he doesn't owe Melanie anything. He says Melanie could screw up the project and will be a major headache, "Melanie is a succubus."

"Yes she does," says Nick.

Nicole is back with Dr. Baker. She hands him her medical records, "You're going to pretend to be my obstetrician."

"The hell I am."

Nicole tries to convince him. Dr Baker says he has already compromised his ethics but won't compromise his job. He reminds her they never discussed the financial details of their arrangement. "Well," says Nicole, "I'm here to sweeten the pot."

EJ and Stefano argue about who will decide what and who trusts whom. Stefano finally backs down and says he will try to stay out of EJ's affairs. They share a hug. A guy hug, of course.

Nick insists he owes this to Melanie, "Don't try to talk me out of this."

Melanie hovers as Stephanie tries to work, "I hate to break it to you but Phillip is just not that into you."

Stephanie says, "Phillip actually cares about me as a person, and he couldn't give a damn about you."

Prevuze

Melanie says, "Well, you wouldn't be saying that if you saw us a couple of weeks ago in my bedroom. Gasp! Did I just say that out loud? Bad Melanie."

"Do you mean did you just make that up out loud," asks Stephanie.

Melanie says she will never forget that wonderful night, "Phillip was there to comfort me. It was a really special time. I could never lie about it." She strolls off and gives Stephanie a couple of snotty looks as she goes down the hall.

Abe asks, "Have you heard screaming like this before."

"Not unless Hope is nagging me," says Bo, "You are the first person I have talked to about this. Am I losing my mind?"

"Can't lose what you don't have," says Abe.

EJ shows up at the hospital and asks Daniel about Nicole. Daniel tells him she was there but left. EJ tells him about Dr. Heisman. Daniel tells EJ Nicole has decided to go with another doctor who is not on staff there, "She said he saved the baby's life."

"He saved the baby's life," asks EJ, "You're right. He couldn't be on staff here."

Dr. Baker says he was tempted by Nicole's offer but now wants no part of it. Nicole says when EJ finds out Dr. Baker lied the DiMeras will come down on him. Dr. Baker changes his tune, "I'll lie again under one condition."

Phillip tells Stephanie he tried everything but Nick wouldn't come across. "I'll bet if you try everything with me I'll come across," says Stephanie. She starts going through the work and messages on his desk, "The caterer called and canceled... These need your signature... Your secretary called in sick... and, one more thing — Did you sleep with Melanie?"

Max weaves a Christmas tree lighting tale for Theo, "I used to go to tree lightings and then afterwards go see Santa and tell him about all the toys I wanted for Christmas. In fact I did that just last week." He gives Theo a candy cane.

Chelsea is amazed, "Wow, you're really good with kids."

"That's because we're on the same mental level," says Max. They both compliment each other on how they handle kids. Max sticks his foot into his mouth, "You'll be a great mom... OMG! I'm so sorry."

Chelsea smiles, "That's OK. I can adopt. I'll make some kid realize how wonderful life in an orphanage can be."

EJ calls the clinic and asks if Nicole is there. The receptionist tells him she is, so EJ heads for the hills.

Dr. Baker gives Nicole his demand, "I want $750,000... in cash... unmarked bills."

Nicole practically faints, "You've got to be kidding. I don't have that kind of money."

"OK," says Dr. Baker, "I guess I'll take marked bills then. That's pocket change to the DiMeras."

Nicole is stunned, "I can't."

"Then there is not a lot I can do for you."

Max asks, "How's the guy thing going for you?"

"Oh, there are millions of them pounding at my door," says Chelsea, "Actually Theo is my main man and I don't think that will last because he's too young to have sex with my mother or grandmother. So, what are you going to do with Charlie?".

Theo overhears, "CHARLIE!"

Daniel examines Bo, "No sign of a tumor."

"Then what are we dealing with," asks Bo.

"Idiotitis."

Phillip insists he didn't sleep with Melanie. Stephanie tells him Melanie implied he did. "There is no need for you to be insecure," says Phillip.

"Easy for you to say."

"Easy for me to fix," Phillip moves closer... closer...

Melanie catches them in the act again, "AHEM! Company policy! No PDA's! If this is going to be tough for you, Phillip then perhaps Stephanie should be my intern."

In a tearful and tender moment, Max gives Charlie to Theo. Theo plops Charlie into the river.

Daniel tells Bo to lower his stress level. Suddenly, Bo has a flash-forward. We see a gurney being rolled up and a medical team hovering over the patient, "This child isn't breathing!"

Stephanie snorts, "If I had to be your intern I'd quit!"

"See," says Melanie, "She's not a team player." she turns to Phillip and smiles, "And how did your sit-down with Nick go?" No answer. "Sweet," she chirps, "Looks like I'm getting the corner office." She turns back to Stephanie, "You have the list of things I want, right? Get going."

Phillip nukes, "Don't talk to her like that!"

Melanie fakes an apology, "I'm sorry. Does the office slut get special kickbacks..."

Stephanie steps in and gives her both barrels, "How dare you talk to me like that! You were the one who was talking about having sex with Phillip!"

"Yeah," says Phillip, "But that never happened. I'd rather stick my hand in a garbage disposal."

"I wouldn't do that," says Stephanie, "That's your last remaining real body part."

Nicole gasps, "$750,000! Can't we put that on an easy payment plan — maybe $1,000 per year for the next 750 years?" She stomps out into the hall. Dr. Baker follows.

EJ sees them, "What the bloody hell are you doing here?"


Previews
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10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Melanie joins Phillip and Stephanie at the pub, "Hi guys! Guess what! I have some newsworthy news!"

"Great," says Stephanie, "Did you finally get that bus ticket to Canada?"


First, we wouldn’t want our Canadian neighbors to suffer in Melanie’s presence. More importantly, Canada is not far enough away from the US. Hmmm, let’s all chip in and send Melanie to Siberia.

Daniel lectures her about prenatal care for Junior-Junior #1, "You're already here and I've got some time, so why don't I check you out right now?"

If Dr. Feelup gives Nicole the same exam he gave Chloe, he’ll be recommending breast augmentation.

Melanie snaps, "Look at the way you dress. I think you should apply for a job at Hooters."

My, gosh, Melanie reads Prevuze!!!!!!!!!

"Melanie is a succubus."

"Yes she does," says Nick.


Naughty, naughty, Prevuze!!!!!!!!!

Stefano finally backs down and says he will try to stay out of EJ's affairs.

It’s too late. EJ already managed to get Nicole pregnant.

"Actually Theo is my main man and I don't think that will last because he's too young to have sex with my mother or grandmother.”

Naughtier, naughtier, Prevuze!!!!!

Only in Salem can an administrative assistant get into the face of the head of the gazillion dollar empire like Titan and actually get away with it. She should have been shown the door on her first day of employment. Melanie, can you say “would you like fries with that burger”? Even McDonald’s wouldn’t put up with that garbage.

Another great Prevuze today but the photos and captions had me laughing hysterically. I must admit that I lost it when I saw Ms. Snodgrass getting her preliminary exam…too, too funny!!! Kudos to The Tree Marlenas and the free breast exams!!! Have a great day everyone and remember…knockers up!!!

5:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Somehow when I read the title I knew it was about Stephanie.

Stephanie & Philip needling about morality and treachery. Hahaha! I wonder how long it'll take before he sticks his proverbial hand in the garbage disposal.

I still adore Melanie, I will until she starts preaching about morality to another person.

So Trent left a toy for Max? Since I didn't watch for a couple of weeks, can anyone tell me if Bo opened the box first or was he actually ethical this time?

Bo is suffering from PTSD? Is he psychic now? Whatev's.

EJ sees them, "What the bloody hell are you doing here?"
???Isn't she at a hospital? Wouldn't it just make more sense to just say 'Hi!' or something?

5:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Klaus: Max opened the box himself but not until we had to endure what seemed like weeks of angst over whether he would open it or not.

7:03 AM  
Blogger cfish said...

Max opened the box himself but not until we had to endure what seemed like weeks of angst over whether he would open it or not.

And is it just me, or is that not the same box that Trent's lawyer handed to Bo? I thought the one the lawyer had was a carved wooden box.

7:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

EJ sees them, "What the bloody hell are you doing here?"
???Isn't she at a hospital? Wouldn't it just make more sense to just say 'Hi!' or something?


Klaus: Nicole and EJ are at the clinic where she lost her baby. Since she was in such distress, you would think Brady would have bundled her up and taken her to a hospital ER but this is DOOL. Common sense is thrown out the window for an inane plot point. As brain dead as EJ is right now, he recognizes there is no reason for Nicole to return to the clinic. She should have a regular OB/GYN.

7:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I didn't notice the box because I was too irritated someone didn't just open the damn thing!

Melanie is so obnoxious. But I love it when she zings Stephanie like "Look at the way you dress. I think you should apply for a job at Hooters." I thought yay, just what we all said.

Loved this: "She says she was taking Theo to the Salem Place tree lighting and decided Theo would like to walk through the seedy part of town to get there." And to go along with that, if you were in charge of (especially someone else's) kid who has a tendency to run off would you take them down by a pier? I wonder if we'll have a near-drowning thing happening.

Great pictures and Prevuisms today! LOL over "Chelsea smiles, "That's OK. I can adopt. I'll make some kid realize how wonderful life in an orphanage can be." HAHAHAHA

Thanks, Prevuze, for the cheer on a very cold and snowy day! :D

7:28 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Melanie and Stephanie exchange looks that could kill.

Unfortunately they apparently don’t.

Melanie snaps, "Look at the way you dress. I think you should apply for a job at Hooters."

Wow! For once one character points out the obvious to another. Got to give Melanie points on that one.

"Yeah," says Phillip, "But that never happened. I'd rather stick my hand in a garbage disposal." "I wouldn't do that," says Stephanie, "That's your last remaining real body part."

Great point!

The pictures were all jewels today. Speaking of which, I totally lost it with Bulldog's astute observation that Hope's jewelry lately could be mistaken for Christmas ornaments. LOLOL

When Bo had that vision of the Christmas tree ornament I had a "vibe" of my own, but tried to ignore it. Yesterday, when he heard a child's scream, I had my own vision - weeks of Bo's sudden psychic ability and totally idiotic storylines! What? Was Celeste unavailable to come back for a few months?

It's snowing like crazy here, but at least Prevuze can plow through the drifts of drivel and clear a path for we Prevuzites to follow.

7:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Did I miss something? Is Philip now CEO of a kindergarten? What a stupid, stupid story line.

10:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kindergartners aren't that childish.

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks everyone, I wasn't paying too much attention there.

And good point Bulldog, I don't even like taking moderately well-behaved kids near large bodies of water.

2:29 PM  

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