Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Sick And Drugged Or Sane And Sober

France... Marseilles... The Orient Express is stalled. Max wonders if they will ever get to Marseilles. He's excited and apprehensive about meeting his sister. He wonders what he will say, "Do you have any idea how many thoughts will be running through my head when I meet her?"

"If you have any thoughts running through your head, I'd say that's a plus," says Stephanie.

Max goes out into the hall and hails the conductor, who always seems to be loitering around their door, "Quelle... heures... a... Marseilles?

The conductor rattles it off, "Blada blah blah blah blada. Blada blada blah, Monsierur, blada."

Max goes back inside, "I think he wanted my autograph."

Stephanie sets him straight, "He said we are a half hour away but there is a slight delay."

Daniel leads Chelsea out onto the balcony to show here the sweetest perk to the apartment... The view.

"I never watch it myself," says Chelsea, "Oh, look, there's the Titan building... and the hospital... and the Brady pub... and the river... with a bloated decomposing body floating in it." Well, nothing turns her on for a face-sucking session like a bloated decomposing body.

Patch surfs through the TV channels. He stops at the news and the newscaster bellows, "A 49 year old man went berserk last night..." Patch sighs, "Man, I wish I could be a 49 year old kid again." He turns the TV off and goes back to his book, "Daddy Don't Drop me." He turns to the chapter, "Mommy and Daddy don't have me."

Kayla comes out and announces Joe is sleeping, "I hope that double dose of Ambien we gave him wasn't too much."

Patch ignores the advice of the Guy Manual (the part that warns him, "never, never, never, never, never bring it up again") and rolls into an endless apology for his little peccadillo with Ava, "The part I can't forgive myself for is OMB's death."

Kayla has another part she's not too happy about either. She thinks Ava needs to pay, "The sooner she's behind bars the better."

Ava pours a drink and tells John she and EJ are finished discussing her case. John assures her Elvis will come up with something to help her. John thinks a jury trial would be good. He reminds her he's still facing charges himself. Ava smiles, "There is another option for both of us. We could just skip bail and leave the country."

John says, "Not a bad idea. I'd like to see Ireland."

Morgan stands at Bo's door like a lost puppy. He lets her in. she wants to know what's up with him and Phillip. Bo is uncharacteristically silent, and lets Phillip leave with Morgan. Bo stares.

Outside the office, Morgan tells Phillip she heard police talking, "His body could be down river by now. What wah if wah they wah never wah find wah him?" Hugs. Bo walks out, surveys the scene and wretches.

Daniel had better have the apartment checked out before he rents it. The roof leaks. Oh, sorry, I guess the roof doesn't leak. I was just fooled by the slurping sound. Daniel wonders if the super would let him sleep out there from time to time. Chelsea pries herself loose and says she doesn't think that would be a good idea, "It could rain and you could get wet and..."

"I didn't know you were a half empty kind of girl," says Daniel.

"I'm half-witted and half-a**ed, a lot of times I go off half-cocked and most of the ideas I come up with are half-baked, so I might as well be half-empty, too," says Chelsea. She stops yapping long enough to breathe and then asks, "You're committed to staying in Salem for a while?"

Daniel says, "For a variety of reasons."

Chelsea says, "Oh, really? What would those be?"

"Only one comes to mind," says Daniel, "you."

The loudspeaker comes on and the theater owner announces, "Barf bags are located in the seat pocket in front of you."

Marlena comes into Roman's office. Roman says he hasn't heard from the ISA about the disc. Marlena gives him her notes on her session with Ava. Roman reads, "This just says you are ethically unable to reveal the contents of the conversation." Roman protests. Marlena stands her ground. Roman remembers he has to talk to Patch and Kayla about testifying. They discuss the situation where Sami nearly sublet her apartment to Ava. "What was she thinking," gasps Marlena, "That one's too juicy to let go. I have to get over to Steve and Kayla's."

John ponders the prospect of flying the coop with Ava, "It sounds tempting, but I've decided I don't have to run because I'm innocent." Ava said she heard Tony talking to John and heard him say Hollingsworth is dead. John chastises Ava for listening to his conversation. Ava insists she was outside the room and couldn't help but overhear. She thinks they'll accuse John of the murder if Paul is dead.

"Paul is dead," repeats John, "That is so sixties."

"That might be true," says Ava, "but if you play the soundtrack of today's episode backwards, it says, 'DOOL is dead.'"

Phillip suggests taking Morgan to the sorority house. She doesn't want to go there since hardly anyone is there during the summer, "I like an audience when I whine." He invites her home with him. Morgan semi-protests but Phillip easily convinces her to go. Bo watches as they leave. He goes into a rage and slams his notebook onto his desk.

At that moment, Marlena comes out of Roman's office and sees the childish tantrum, "Bo... Are you OK?"

Bo insists he 's fine, but the case he's working on is frustrating. Marlena offers to talk about it in her capacity as the police psychiatrist. Bo says if he needed to talk it would have to be with someone else, "I might actually want some help."

Stephanie comes back into the berth. She announces they are 30 miles from Marseilles, there is something on the tracks and the officials on the train don't know how long they will be stuck. Max pulls out his GPS. He bangs it a couple of times but can't get anything, "This is the weirdest thing I've ever seen. All I can get on the screen is a message that says, 'God Punishes Sinners."

So now we go through the convoluted and outlandish scenario that will lead Nick and Nora to find Melanie. Stephanie mentions that they somehow know the street closest to the cell phone tower that picked up the conversation when Max called Melanie is Rue Jourdan. Max has finally gotten his GPS working, "But this says Rue Jourdan is fifteen miles long. It will be impossible to find her."

"Not if you close your eyes and click your ruby slippers together," says Stephanie.

Patch wishes he could sleep like L'il Joe. He wishes Stephanie would not have gone on her wild goose chase with Max. Kayla thinks Stephanie will offer great support for Max. Mercifully, a knock interrupts the tedious conversation. Patch opens the door to find Roman and Marlena. "Hope this isn't a bad time," says Roman.

"With you two standing at the door," says Patch, "Anytime would be a bad time."

Bo asks for a word with Phillip. He takes him aside and says, "I really don't want to believe you had anything to do with the murder, but it's stupid for you to be hanging out with Paul's daughter."

Back on the balcony, Chelsea and Daniel cuddle on the chaise lounge as Daniel reads her 'The Cat In The Hat.' Chelsea decides she needs to pry into what's going on between Bo and Victor. Daniel doesn't think that would be a good idea at all.

Patch tells Roman he will testify at Ava's trial. Kayla walks off and sulks. Marlena eyes her prey and swoops in. Kayla tells her about the fight she and Patch had over Ava, "I lost it."

Roman thinks Ava might do time. He tells Patch the courts decided the international case takes precedence. He also tells him one of Ava's ne'er-do-well henchmen cut a deal and will testify against her, "I know part of you feels guilty, but this is not your fault."

"That's what your sister keeps telling me," says Patch.

Kayla tells Marlena she has tried to have sympathy for Ava but can't wait until she's out of their lives for good. Marlena thinks it's only a matter of time until Ava hurts someone else.

John tells Ava he won't run. He has to vindicate himself. Ava asks if Marlena is the real reason he won't run.

Bo and Phillip ramble on about his relationship with Morgan. Phillip is adamant, "Morgan needs me now and say it with him, I'm gonna be there for her." He insists he had nothing to do with Paul's disappearance and tells Bo he's taking Morgan home.

Stephanie in on her phone, "Oui.. oui.. merci.. au revoir, Didier."

Max only picks up one word of the conversation. He immediately wants to know who this Didier fella is. Stephanie tells him Didier is an old friend. Apparently, the Didster knows a lot about the area. He told her there is an exclusive girl's boarding school right there on good Ole Rue Jourdain. In other words, it took them about five minutes to get another clue to finding the needle in the haystack. Impressive, of course. But Max only wants to know about Didier.

Marlena asks if Bo has been by to see L'il Joe. Kayla says no. Marlena thinks Bo is a little stressed and she is concerned. Kayla just doesn't know what it could be, but offers to try to find out.

Bo obsesses. He makes a call, "Bring me everything we have on the Hollingsworth case."

Chelsea wants to fix things if something is going on between Bo and Victor. Daniel tells her to cool it.

Bo sits among dozens of evidence bags. Just so Bo has a clue, each bag is carefully labeled, "EVIDENCE." Bo turns on his recorder, "Salem Police Department... Case # 10875, Hollingsworth, Paul, Captain's log... Stardate 2008.23.07 OK Brady, there has to be something here you didn't see before. Let's find it."

John says Blondie has no say in his decisions. Ava is afraid she will lose John because Marlena won't give up. John doesn't like the fact she has already resigned herself to going to prison, "Waiting for the other shoe to drop is a hell of a way to live."

Ava insists, "I haven't given up. I don't give up easily."

"Neither do I," says John, "Unless it's something trivial like getting my mind back. Let me make a phone call and see what I can do." He excuses himself.

Ava boozes it up. The doorbell rings and she goes to get it. MARLENA!

Max is on the phone, "Melanie Layton... That's right... Oh, that's just great..." Max gets off the phone and tells Stephanie they won't give out any names.

Stephanie thinks his approach was wrong, "You're such a guy. Guys are obvious and awkward. Women are clever and resourceful..." The ever clever and resourceful doormat calls the school and parlez with the operator. She cooks up a story about being an old friend, leaves a message for Melanie to call and hangs up.

"You're a genius," says exclaims Max.

"I know."

Patch and Kayla discuss the Hollingsworth case. They decide if Ava is convicted she'll be going away for a long time. "Sick and drugged or sane and sober," says Kayla, "Ava is dangerous."

Patch gets a call from Stephanie. She tells him about finding the school. Patch wishes them luck. Kayla signals that she wants to talk. Stephanie says, "I bet I'll hardly recognize L'il Joe when I get home."

"He's already in the second grade," says Kayla.

Kayla hangs up. Patch gets that twinkle in his eye, "I think we should go in and get some... sleep." Patch wasted his breath. He should have checked with the chapter in the Guy Manual entitled, "When Hell Freezes Over."

Kayla has something else in mind, "I have a mission for you... involving beer."

Patch mulls it over in his mind, "Beer... Kayla... beer... Kayla... beer... Kayla..." Beer wins.

Bo goes through the mountain of stuff and gets a call, "Now? All right. See you in a few."

Marlena tells Ava she is ethically unable to testify. "I'll bet you're hating that," says Ava.

"I took an oath," says Marlena, "I'm tired of violating it." She suggests Ava go back to her father's house. Ava says it's too full of bad memories. John comes in and announces Ava will be staying there. Marlena asks to talk to John privately.

She takes him aside, "I wanna ask you something, and it's really important. I want the truth."

The deck sealed the deal for Daniel. "The deck... and the fact that it was a short term lease," says Chelsea, "Should we head back down?"

"Not quite yet," says Daniel, "I brought a little music." He turns on the fern sitting next to them, "May I have this dance?" Dancing with the stars it ain't.

Max fidgets, "There must be something else we can do while we are waiting." Translation, "Gentlemen, start your engines." Stephanie attacks him.

John says he already knows what Marlena is going to ask. He thinks it's none of her business, "You want to know if I had anything to do with Paul's disappearance."

"Did you?" John lights a Cuban. Marlena pesters, "Did you kill him, John.?" Ava watches.

Morgan and Phillip are at the mansion. She tells him she could really use a hug. Phillip complies.

Bo and Patch drink together at the pub. Patch gripes about L'il Joe's feeding schedule. Bo wants to know why Patch called him. Patch says Kayla asked him to talk to Bo. Bo says there is something going on but he's handling it. Patch asks, "Are you in trouble?"

"Not yet."

"Are you gonna be?"


"Maybe your incontinence is temporary."

Bo spills the beans about covering up for Phillip.


You can watch the previews later today on our PREVUZE II website. Prevuze II should be up no later than noon, Eastern Time.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think Days needs to start passing out barf bags if they continue writing in these sickening Chelsea/Daniel scenes. Reading through it, I see he still shows no remorse for banging her grandma as well as telling her to leave her father and uncle alone? Nice.

5:24 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Bo walks out, surveys the scene and wretches.
Between Phillip/Morgan and Dr. Dan/Chelsea, it’s a wonder that he keeps anything down. 
Daniel had better have the apartment checked out before he rents it. The roof leaks. Oh, sorry, I guess the roof doesn't leak. I was just fooled by the slurping sound.
OMG, Prevuze, it’s that bad?  I’ll take your word for it.  ZAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Marlena offers to talk about it in her capacity as the police psychiatrist.
Well that certainly puts everything into perspective.  Marlena is on the SPD payroll.  Go figure.
Kayla has something else in mind, "I have a mission for you... involving beer."

Patch mulls it over in his mind, "Beer... Kayla... beer... Kayla... beer... Kayla..." Beer wins.

Hmmm…DOOL…beer…DOOL…beer…DOOL…Leinenkugel’s Sunset Wheat beer.  I now have a plan, and it doesn’t include watching this episode of DOOL.
Prevuze, all the Dr. Dan the pervert man and Chelsea Prevuzisms are just hysterical!!!  Mary Kay and Bulldog, you are both twisted puppies, and, of course, I mean that in a good way!!!  Prevuze once again proves this blog belongs on the ESPN site with the snarky Indiana Pacers reference!!!  Thanks for making hump day bearable!!!

5:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very Boring show today. Between Chan, Stax, and Phorgan I think I'll pass.

6:00 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

The episode is boring but Prevuze is right-on. LOL over"Depends." "Maybe your incontinence is temporary.", L'il Joe being SORAS'd to the second grade and the Pacers. HAHAHA

I just have to zap thru any Dansea or Stax sucking scenes. That's just too much to ask of any viewer!

Prevuze, thanks for getting us going this morning! :D

6:47 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Great snarky pic about the Pacers, but really...almost any pro basketball team could get the nod. HA

The Prevuisms were outstanding today:

He turns to the chapter, "Mommy and Daddy don't have me."

Patch ignores the advice of the Guy Manual (the part that warns him, "never, never, never, never, never bring it up again") and rolls into an endless apology for his little peccadillo with Ava.

Loved both of those.

Daniel had better have the apartment checked out before he rents it. The roof leaks. Oh, sorry, I guess the roof doesn't leak. I was just fooled by the slurping sound.

Pop didn’t squirt out of my nose reading that, but snot did. Does that count? LOLOLOL

The loudspeaker comes on and the theater owner announces, "Barf bags are located in the seat pocket in front of you."

Holy Joker, Batman! Prevuze is really on a tear today.

”Paul is dead," repeats John, "That is so sixties."

"That might be true," says Ava, "but if you play the soundtrack of today's episode backwards, it says, 'DOOL is dead.'"

I hope all you youngsters out there got that reference to an urban legend that ranks up there with the all-time greats like spiders nesting in bee-hive hair-dos. HAHAHA

Patch gets a call from Stephanie. Just to check to see if the Salem Time Warp is in effect – what time does it appear to be in both places, Prevuze? Since there is a 6-7 hour time difference between most of the midwest and most of France I’m wondering if that’s apparent on the show?

Thanks, everyone, for the great read!

6:47 AM  
Anonymous brandi said...

spoiler alert**

looks like phillip will take a bullet for morgan who he admits to falling in love with - the shooter, an ava goon - victor will flatline when he finds out phil's been shot - also, stefano will be back early august and i hear bart will be back (or a bart double) i know there is alot of bart fans out there - and do lucas & chloe hook up again at the horton cabin (looks like lucas won't be behind bars for long)

9:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ahhh Morgan Hollingsworth, poster child for pensive body language and whiners everywhere.
Where is Dan's apartment? That looked like the roof to Sami's apartment that he and Kate were on the other day. I kept watching for John and Ava and flying clothes to come into frame.
Where would Max be had Stephanie not decided to hop a train like an obsessive hobo and follow him around? He thinks there's a Brady Pub in France that all the French go to and he'll find Melanie there?
I saw Chelsea talking with Grandma and Bo about her job. She was naming names of patients. Isn't that a highly illegal breach of confidence? Oh, Except for Salem, I forgot. She talks like she's working for a nursery school rather than assistant OT in a hospital. I think that would have been a better job choice for her on the show. No. Seriously, it would make more sense that she work in the hospital daycare or some other daycare than being assistant Occupational Therapist.
I work in an elementary school. I can't wait for school to start back. I'm getting way too hooked on DOOL.

9:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Other Spoilers:

Bo admits to Hope that he tampered with the evidence.

Nicole tells EJ she's still married to Trent (huh? didn't she just get a divorce from Victor).

John tells Ava he's responsible for Paul's disappearance.



9:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

he still shows no remorse for banging her grandma as well as telling her to leave her father and uncle alone? Nice.
You're right. When he blasted Bo for stressing his heart, I nearly lost it. He released Bo and has really no right to threaten to put him in the hospital with no visitors. He's "Just a surgeon."
Besides, he's dating Bo's four year old...I mean, 21 yr old daughter. That's not stress to a man? Daniel needs to lighten up.
Sounds like he needs another "visit" with Grandma to calm his nerves.

9:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ava keeps making comments that Marlena is in her way of corraling John as her own. I keep wondering if Marlena will be the one she tries to hurt soon, trying to get rid of her?

Isn't it odd that people always know exactly where to find whoever it is they are looking for on DOOL, unless it's a dead body showing up or a trip to France that takes way too long, or some event that DOOL drags out?
How did Kate know where Daniel's new apartment was, unless he invited her to look at the view? I got the impression from watching that scene that they might have had one last good roll in the hay for the road afterwards. It was that whole sexual tone of voices and what they didn't say that gave me that feeling.

I hope Chelsea finds him out before they have sex.

If Nicole is still married to Trent, then her marriage to Victor wasn't a legal one? I guess Melanie must be her daughter then? Maybe Trent spirited Melanie away to France and told Nicole she was dead at birth or something to that effect? Maybe Nicole will find out she has a living daughter and that can change her life now? Just more reasons that someone will kill old Trent soon.

Notice how Ava is being turned back now into a bad character? I guess that is to make her fans dislike her so they can make her leave the show soon?

10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Strange, but it really did look like Marlena was wearing Depends in all her latest outfits? lol

10:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about writing The Guy's Manual, Prevuze? I think it would make you a very rich lady. You are definitely very talented.

10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can buy that Nicole thought her daughter was dead at birth and Trent spirited Melanie away to France to a boarding school. I hope it does give Nicole a way to straighten out her life. I also think Trent will be killed soon by someone and that Ava might try to harm Marlena. John will probably be the one who rescues her, yet again.

10:37 AM  
Anonymous Scolly said...

Prevuze II?

12:45 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Prevuze II?

...has been up since 11:15 Eastern Time.

1:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice reference to the world's greatest band. Hate Stax and Chan with the heat of a thousand burning suns!

4:45 PM  
Anonymous good eats said...

Thank the soap gods for prevuze, I just saved an hour out of my life.

I can not deal with Chan. a grown man interested in a girl who looks/acts like she's still in high school is just wrong on every level.

6:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

With Chelsea's work history, shouldn't she be in some sort of occupational therapy, or rather vocational therapy? She barely has the experience and education to be a candy striper much less asst. occupational therapist. Candy striper...hmmmm...Old Dan would like the looks of that, huh?

Have ya'll noticed they are shooting Sami with big tops and head shots lately? Wonder how far along she is?

Speaking of tops, I'm so sick of characters as old as Lexi and Chloe prancing around in public wearing what looks like Billie Holiday's slip. Lexi was wearing a purple slip (underwear) with black lace on it to the police department. Honey, leave that look for the professional ladies of the night. Chloe just bedazzles a few sequins on her slips and it's a party dress.
Who dresses these women?

If Melanie is Nicoles daughter, where will that leave poor Pooky? How can she ever be mother to Melanie and Pooky? Come to think of it, we haven't heard from Pooky lately. Maybe she's in heat and locked in her apartment. We can do that with some other DOOL characters.

Hey, I didn't get this comment in the other day. Remember when they brought little Joe home? Steve and Kayla were yelling at each other about him being in bed with Ava. Screaming at the top of their voices right in the room with delicate little sleeping Joe and the whole time Steve had the nerve to put a "Sleeping Baby, Knock softly" sign on the door. Oh, I love the DOOL irony.

2:36 AM  

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