Friday, February 08, 2008

Puke And Pandemonium

The guard brings Lucas into the visitation room. Sami runs in. Lucas thought maybe she might have changed her mind about coming. Sami reminds him he's going away for a long time. "I'll be gone for years," says Lucas.

"So it's year's, huh?"

"Eight to ten," sighs Lucas.

"That's a long time," says Sami. "I know," says Lucas, "The twins will be about 20 by then." He asks where Allie is.

EJ sits down with the kids, "Let's make a deal. No more throwing up on me and I'll take you to the zoo when you're three." Johnny bawls as EJ takes him to lie down. He asks Allie if she is feeling better and puts her down. Then he picks up the screaming Johnny again. "Johnny, I'll make you another deal, if you stop crying, I'll buy you a pony." Allie joins the crazy chorus. EJ accuses them of ganging up on him. Amidst all the noise, we barely hear a knock at the door. Finally, EJ hears it and announces that reinforcements have arrived. He opens the door to find Tony. Tony smiles like the cat that ate the canary. EJ looks at the twins and says, "Looks like you guys still have the upper hand."

OMB hates leaving Colleen. Bo says, "You're not leaving her. She isn't here any more."

"But she'll always be with you," says Hope.

OMB is confused, "I thought you said she wasn't here.

Bo tells Hope he has to check his messages. He turns and squirms in pain. After a few moments he turns back to Hope, "No messages."

Belle and Shawn come in with Claire, followed by Phillip and Chloe. Phillip stows. Chloe broods. She thought they would find Brady on this trip. Phillip tries to comfort her but she doesn't want to talk about it.

Patch and Kayla arrive and find a couple of seats. Kayla goes back to the restroom. Hope thanks Steve for helping with Claire when they were with Colleen. Patch says 'twarnt nothin'.

Hope doesn't agree, "You are Steve Johnson – the rock. And that's just your IQ."

"I don't know about that," says Patch.

"OK," says Hope, "You're Steve Johnson, the pebble."

"Now you're making fun of the size of my brain," says Patch. Suddenly, he sees the mystery woman outside and he bolts for the door. Kayla comes back as Patch is running out and asks where he is going.

Patch about bowls over John and Marlena as they come in. John picks up the phone, "Let's get this bird in the air."

Kayla yells for Patch to stop. He pushes his way off the plane. Kayla says she has no idea why he ran off and asks John not to let the plane take off without him. John hangs up, "It's OK, the plane has to be deiced anyway." Kayla abandons ship to look for Patch.

Bo sits with OMB. John leafs through a magazine. Marlena says, "You have been through an emotional hellstorm, how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," growls John, "How should I be feeling?"

"You might be sad."

"I don't do sad," says John, "Are you trying to shrink me?"

"No," says Marlena, "Do I have to remind you your mother died?"

"I didn't kill her," says John, "But she's dead anyway." Marlena thinks he should feel something.

"I feel that it's over and she died peacefully," says John, "Win-win all the way around, wouldn't you say? Why should I feel sad?"

"She was a good woman who loved you and she is now gone." Marlena asks why he stayed behind after the scattering of the ashes.

"I thought I saw Colleen and Santo," says John, "Probably an hallucination. I don't want to talk about it." Marlena agrees and goes to check on OMB.

Sami tells Lucas she couldn't bring Allie. Lucas rants. He misses her. Sami tells him Allie she is sick. "Take her to a doctor," snorts Lucas.

"Lexie saw her," says Sami.

"I said take her to a doctor.

Sami promises to take her in if she doesn't get better sooner. Lucas asks how Johnny is doing. Sami tells him he's OK. She knows how much Lucas wants to be with both of them, even though at the moment EJ would probably trade places with him. Sami knows Lucas is devastated. "It's my fault," mopes Lucas, "I shot your husband and have to pay for it." Sami thinks he could have found some other way to vent his frustrations, "Why did you do this?"

"Because of you."

Tony looks at the flustered EJ, "I love the vomit on the shirt." He pours a drink and asks EJ if he wants one.

"As you can see," says EJ, "I'm sort of on duty."

"It's on you, too," says Tony, "This is quite entertaining."

Johnny screams. EJ bounces. He wonders why Tony is there. Tony says, "I came to see how you are handling things and I would say from the look of things – not well."

EJ tells Tony he doesn't know what he is missing. He asks if Tony has ever thought about having a family. Tony surveys the room full of puke and pandemonium, "It's not for me." Johnny screams. EJ shushes. Anna arrives.

Patch runs out on the tarmac. A worker walks toward him carrying a ladder. Patch slams into him like a New England Patriots linebacker. In other words, he doesn't hit him very hard at all. Kayla chases and catches up to him, "What's going on?"

Marlena thinks Santo and Colleen's love story had a happy ending. She tells Bo, Hope and OMB about John seeing their apparitions in the field, "I think it was real."

John overhears her and leans in, "All I saw was green. Green. Green everywhere. Green, green, green. More green." John turns away from them and gets back on the plane phone."

"I need details," says Bo.

"I think he means he saw green," says Marlena, "I heard after losing Colleen, Santo never smiled. After we scattered Colleen's ashes, I think they found peace. I hope Santo and Colleen did, too."

John, "Speaks into the phone, "Roger that." He turns and announces, "Cleared for takeoff."

Patch apologizes. Kayla wonders what's up. Patch says they have to get back. He takes off for the plane like a New England Patriots wide receiver. In other words, Kayla catches him easily.

Lucas says he shot EJ for Sami. Sami insists she could have handled things. Lucas agrees he screwed up. Sami lectures. What he did made everything worse. Lucas defends himself, "I had to do something. EJ isn't a nice guy, you know."

Lloooooooonnnggg pause. Lucas goes wide-eyed, "He's not, right?"

Sami agrees. She rants and says it seems like Lucas wanted to go away. "You always push me," says Lucas, "And then I do something stupid to win you back."

"Yeah," says Sami, "The way you act you'd think you're trying to win me back 100% of the time." Lucas insists he did all this because he loves her. He always did and always will.

Anna has brought gifts for the twins. She wonders what Tony is doing there. Tony asks, "Do I have to have a reason to visit my brother?"

"I'd be suspicious if you didn't," says Anna. She takes Allie.

"She threw up on his shirt," says Tony.

"Actually," says EJ, "It was Johnny who threw up on me."

Tony asks, "They throw up when they are feeling well?"

"Only if they're watching DOOL," says EJ.

Anna turns to Tony, "Don't you remember, Carrie threw up on you a couple of times and she was what... ten?"

"That was a memory I was trying to forget," says Tony.

Allie wails. Anna tries to comfort her. Tony rolls his eyes.

Bo asks Patch why he took off. He claims he left his phone in the terminal. Kayla doesn't buy it.

Lucas rants, "OK, fine I'm stupid."

"You have a firm grasp of the obvious," says Sami.

"I'm trying to be the kind of person Allie and Will could be proud of."

"That's not working out too well, is it," says Sami.

"I have to pay dearly," says Lucas, "But It's because I love you."

Sami hugs him. She says she has never stopped loving him and never will. Her cell phone rings, "It's my mom. They must be on their way back." Sami picks up.

Marlena tells her they're on the way home. She tells her Colleen died.

"What are you talking about," asks Sami.

Marlena explains things, "We scattered her ashes and I had a feeling she and Santo were reunited. Ashes to ashes, lust to lust. Love denied is never right. Maybe after death it's OK." She wishes Sami had been there.

PrevuzePatch insists he just forgot his phone. John says the pilot anticipates a smooth flight. Translation: Buckle those seat belts. We pan in on the mystery girl.

Insecure Lucas asks, "You said you never stopped loving me, is that true."

"Of course," says Sami, "I'm sorry you have to ask me that. I love you so much."

It means a lot to Lucas to hear her say that, "I know I will be in your heart for all the Days Of Our Lives."

"No," says Sami, "You'll be in prison."

Lucas vows to work to get an early release. He goes through some mumbo jumbo about how cooperative he has been and how they like the fact that he confessed without giving them any trouble, so he's already a model prisoner, "If the jails get over crowded, I'll be one of the first to get out."

Sami bawls, "I just can't picture you in a yellow jumpsuit with a murderer for a cellmate. Yellow isn't your color."

"They don't wear yellow," says Lucas, "They wear orange."

"I don't care if they are striped," says Sami.

Deep conversation, eh?

Lucas assures her he can take care of himself. He knows it will be hard for her, "I don't expect you to wait for me. I just want you to promise you will always love me." Sami stares.

The plane flies. John looks out the window. Marlena asks what he sees. "There is nothing out there," says John.

"That's what you said over Ireland."

"There was nothing out there either."

Kayla presses Patch to tell her why he bolted from the plane. He gets irritated and says he just forgot his phone. She thinks something else is bothering him.

"Yeah," says Patch, "You."

Hope asks if Bo is OK. "There is something I gotta tell ya," says Bo, "It's something important I haven't told you."

Hope says, "Shoot, what is it? Brady, tell me." Bo says he doesn't have all the facts and can't be specific. Hope presses. Bo tells her Kayla didn't go to Ireland just to bring OMB. He says he doesn't know much at all.

"Brady," says Hope, "Just tell me everything. But if the word 'Billie' comes into the conversation, I'll throw you out of the plane myself."

"Fancy Face," says Bo, "You'll just have to trust me on this. When the time is right you will know. Hope wonders if he doesn't trust her. Bo says he just doesn't have all the details. Something is going on and he's taking care of it and she needs to let it go at that. Hope presses. She wants him to be honest with her. Bo says marriage is about honesty but also about trust. Hope says if he thinks it's best she not know she will take it into consideration but if she decides she has to know he has to promise to tell her.

OK. Let's recap that ridiculous conversation.

Bo: "I have something very important to tell you."

Hope: "What is it?"

Bo: "I can't tell you."

Anna and EJ put the kids down for a nap. Anna asks where Sami is. EJ says she is at the jail saying goodbye to Lucas. Anna wonders if EJ is OK with that. He says he knows she still loves Lucas. Tony thinks she will forget him in time. Anna doesn't let that opportunity slip by, "The way you forgot me, darling?"

Sami tells Lucas he is a part of her and they have been through a lot together. She says Lucas has forgiven her for everything so now it's her turn. She has never stopped loving him and never could. Knowing she loves him is all Lucas needs. Lucas thinks it's time to stop worrying and start trusting. He says he has made a terrible mistake and has to pay for it. He wants her to live her life without him. She hugs him and cries, "Are you crazy, Lucas?"

"I'm as crazy as a soup sandwich," says Lucas, "But that's beside the point. Just promise me one thing. Make sure you don't trust EJ. Be careful around him. Don't be near him any more than you have to."

Bo suggests getting snacks. Hope thinks he's just trying to change the subject. She says she hasn't felt like eating in days. "You need to keep your strength up," says Bo.

"What does that mean," asks Hope. She kisses him and decides they can drop this for now because she's tired.

"We're tired of it, too," yells some gal in the audience.

Phillip tells Chloe if anyone can find Brady it's his father. Chloe isn't encouraged, "I noticed you started that sentence with an 'if.'" Phillip rephrases and says it's only a matter of time until they find him. Chloe says that won't stop her from worrying or whining.

Phillip asks, "Well, what happens when he does come back? Do you see divorce in the future?" Chloe doesn't know. She grabs Phillip's hand.

Kayla wonders why Patch won't eat. She says he was acting fine until he ran off the plane. They go to check on OMB. He's practically a zombie, but insists he will be OK. "At least you got to see her again," says Kayla.

"All those years I thought she was dead," whines OMB.

Patch thinks it's the last couple of days that mattered, "It was like when she saw you she could finally pass on."

"Do I look that bad," asks OMB.

A guard comes to get Lucas. He tells him it's time to go and grabs him like a New England Patriots Defensive Tackle. In other words, he's pretty gentle with him. Lucas tells Sami he has made a DVD with messages for Allie to watch on her birthdays, "There are ten messages on there. Hopefully she will only have to use eight." Sami breaks down. Hugs. The guard reminds Lucas it's time to go. He tells Sami he would have made her a DVD too, but he didn't have time, "It's pretty hectic sitting around in a jail cell doing nothing. There is a lot I would have put on it. I would have told you how beautiful you look in the morning and how I know you will get more beautiful each day." He promises to love her with all his heart. Sami takes the DVD and goes. As she leaves, Lucas reminds her not to trust EJ.

"I love you," says Sami as she backs out. The door closes behind her and we have the hackneyed scene where they touch hands through the wired glass. Sami leaves. Lucas sighs.

Anna asks, "Is that how things appear to you. Out of sight, out of mind? If you can't see me you forget me?"

Tony says, "You do have a tendency to over dramatize."

Anna snorts, "You haven't seen anything yet." She huffs out and slams the door.

EJ throws Tony a look, "Whew!"

The gang on the plane has lunch. Suddenly, the plane lurches. The gang on the plane loses lunch. Everyone buckles up. John twirls his glass and gives his uncaring stare, "Uh-oh." We watch the plane fly off in the distance.


Previews
========

You can watch the previews later today on our PREVUZE II website.

23 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

Patch slams into him like a New England Patriots linebacker. In other words, he doesn't hit him very hard at all.

Oh, Prevuze, talk about unsportsmanlike conduct.

He takes off for the plane like a New England Patriots wide receiver. In other words, Kayla catches him easily.

Oh, Prevuze, you are so bad! However, I must admit I was rooting for Eli.

Tony asks, "They throw up when they are feeling well?"

"Only if they're watching DOOL," says EJ.


My goodness, Prevuze, you are on quite a roll today!!

She wishes Sami had been there.

…and so does the entire viewing audience. It would have also been nice if EJ had been included.

How typical. Instead of taking responsibility for his own actions, Lucas tells Sami he shot EJ because of her. Let’s transfer the guilt to someone else.

As usual, Prevuze is outstanding. The pictures and captions are great, and the one with Sami offering Lucas cookies, cigars, and K-Y was especially snarky!!!

5:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok, I'm throwing the flag for unsportsmanlike conduct for all the "weak" Patriots refrences. I'm a life long Pat's fan and take offense.....Ok, I'm over it.
Now onto the drivel that is Days of our Lives. This episode sounds completely pointless and boring. At least prevuze is here to make it interesting even if it was at the expense of my poor defeated Pats.

5:47 AM  
Blogger cfish said...

Anonymous --
Never fear. With Prevuze being an "equal opportunity snarker", I'm sure that if the Patriots had won the Superbowl we'd have had the words "York" and "Giants" substituted for "England" and "Patriots" in each of those references.

But just for the record, I was rooting for Eli, too! ;-)

6:18 AM  
Anonymous tnchargerfan said...

I thought I was gonna wet my pants when I read all the Patriots references!! WTG, Prevuze!!

6:41 AM  
Anonymous em said...

Yep, Prevuze sounds way better than this episode is going to be . . .

Thank you for the nice recap of Bo & Hope's conversation. Surely that is exactly how the storyboard looks when the writers are working on this stuff, and they could have used that and saved the dialogue that reads like something between two four year olds.

I thoroughly enjoyed the timely Pats' references. And the win by the Giants!

7:08 AM  
Anonymous Victoria said...

OK. Let's recap that ridiculous conversation.

Bo: "I have something very important to tell you."

Hope: "What is it?"

Bo: "I can't tell you."


ROFLOL! That's what I was thinking while reading that drivel.
The scenes with Tony and EJ sound kind of fnnny.

7:30 AM  
Anonymous carol said...

This is my first post. I have to tell you how much I enjoy reading Pervuze every morning. It's the first thing I do. I walk straight to the computer stinky breath and all. hee. You are very talented, I don't know how you come up with something witty to write everyday. You should have your own show on soapnet:o)
Thanks for the good chuckle every morning, most of the time it's more then a chuckle.

7:49 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Let's recap today's Prevuze report:

DOOL: Boring scenes relieved only by Tony/Anna/EJ sparring. Weak, repetitive dialog, ESPECIALLY between Lumi.

Prevuze: Pictures - a hoot. Prevuisms - inspired. Total experience - LMAO.

8:12 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Pats fans get over it! At least your teams and the New York teams(baseball and football) are in either the World Series or Super Bowl every year. I surely speak for everyone not living on the east coast that we're more than tired of New York and New England. There, that's my rant.

On to more pleasant subjects - Prevuze! I'm still laughing over the recap of Ho and Dope's ridiculous conversation. You could probably do that after just about every DOOL conversation! HAHAHAHA

And has anyone else had the horrible thought I have - Hope with her dizzyness standing up, etc....maybe she's having a generic pregnancy, too? Because those are the usual soap pregnancy warning signs. She and Kayla can deliver on the same day and this will give Bo the strength to live. If this happens I'LL need the strength to live!!!

Thanks, Prevuze, for the strength to at least get to the weekend! :D

8:19 AM  
Anonymous KOTU said...

Lucas says he shot EJ for Sami. Sami insists she could have handled things, etc. For pete's sake, the guy is going away for 8-10 years and rehashing this samo samo for the hundredth time is the best they can do??

Loved all the pictures today. I spewed liquid when I got to the "K-Y" picture. OMG that was funny!!

Particularly good prevuism that hasn't been mentioned yet:

Hope doesn't agree, "You are Steve Johnson – the rock. And that's just your IQ."

After this line from Jawn, "Are you trying to shrink me?" I fully expected a snappy prevuism about Doc physically shrinking him somehow. But since I couldn't come up with one on the fly, I guess Prevuze couldn't either.

Ya just can't react to ALL of the golden opportunities on this show to snark. LOLOL

Great one today. TX

8:21 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

Lucas commits attempted murder and gets 8-10 years?

I get it, in Salem you only get punished if you FAIL to kill someone.
That must be how it is. Because no one ever seems to go to jail when someone dies.

OMB hates leaving Colleen. Bo says, "You're not leaving her. She isn't here any more."

"But she'll always be with you," says Hope.


You forgot:
Who's on first?
What?
What's on second.
Who?
No, who's on first.
I don't know.
Third base.

LOL No wait, those lines were written by ACTUAL WRITERS!!!
Ahhh so Lord knows we can't use those.

So why is Tony suddenly all interested in EJ? He didn't seem to even know he existed a while back. And why is Anna with him?
I thought she dumped him because he wouldn't propose.

Anyway. Great Prevuze as always.
Forgive me for being so late today, but I do have a new blog, so be sure to check it out.
These Are The Daze Of Our Lives

9:36 AM  
Anonymous GBB said...

A Prevusism you missed?

Hope: "She'll always be with you, Shawn, wherever you go. She'll always be with all of us after that memorial service. I'm still picking bits of her from under my fingernails.

11:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If Bo is the one that is sick, why is Hope having symptoms too? (back hurting, lack of an appitite, ect) Unless, they mixed up the blood work, and it's really Hope that is dying, but Bo is being a hypocondriac (sp) because Kayla said he was sick, so now he feels sick.....
hmmmm.
Or maybe, the blood work got mixed up and Hope is pregnant, not Kayla....hmmm....
I mean, come on, we already know how inept that hospital is.

11:18 AM  
Anonymous foo said...

OK, I admit it, I'm a Pats fan and have been even thru the lean years, and I mean VERY lean years of humiliating Super Bowl losses! They haven't ALWAYS been in the Super Bowl. As far as the Red Sox are concerned. Holy Moses, give us a break! We had the longest dry spell in baseball. We fans deserve a couple of good years.

As far as Eli is concerned, if he and his brother weren't EVERYWHERE you look, I might feel differently about all this nonsense.

Anyway, good job Prevuze, as always. Just please lay off my Pats now.

Thanks,
Foo

11:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok, after seeing Prevuze II I am officially tired of John's 'sh*t-eating grin' ALL OF THE TIME! It would be different if he didn't have the 'I hate everyone' attitude all of the time... if that's the case - he surely would have been able to kill himself!

Anna, Tony & E.J. -boring (time waste).
Lucas and Sami - same, same, same dialog - over and over! At this point, who cares? I thought they said goodbye the other day!!!! How many times will Lucas call her to the jail, just one more time??? LOL!
Bo & Hope's sickness mystery? You writers are stupidly hysterial...(and I know this is NOT a comedic storyline).
And finally, I can't believe that they have finished the Santo/Colleen storyline and there are still so many loose ends. What a total disappointment! All that nuild up - for what? Nothing!!!

Love Prevuze!!!! Keep up the great work.

P.. - I can tell I'm slowly fading away from 'Days'. I find that I'm more entertained by watching 'Y&R' - that comes on after 'Days' on Soapnet at night. I save all of my nightly chores to do while 'Days' is on and then actually sit down to watch 'Y&R'... I have always watched 'Days'!!!!!
These writers are ruining Days!
JMO
Thanks again Prevuze!!!!

11:27 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

After this line from Jawn, "Are you trying to shrink me?" I fully expected a snappy prevuism about Doc physically shrinking him somehow. But since I couldn't come up with one on the fly, I guess Prevuze couldn't either.

Oh, wrong you are, KOTU. I had a snappy little Prevuzism in there, but decided it was "inappropriate" and was too lazy to put in the "censored" link, so I took it out. This is how it went...

"I'm fine," growls John, "How should I be feeling?"

"You might be sad."

"I don't do sad," says John, "Are you trying to shrink me?"

"No," says Marlena, "CENSORED! DO NOT CLICK ON THIS LINK. Do I have to remind you your mother died?"

12:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

censored link = brilliant

~Lisa

12:59 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Just please lay off my Pats now.

Well, that was actually courteous, well thought out and mild, especially compared to a private email rampage I received. You Patriots fans are certainly a sensitive bunc... LOYAL... I MEANT LOYAL.

I have to say, in terms of Pats-bashing, Prevuze is probably the least of your problems. I swear, the term "EIGHTEEN AND ONE" has now become one of the most infamous phrases in sports lore, and is sure to go down in sports history as one of the ultimate metaphors for failure.

Hang in there, Pats fans. I'm sure in order to suck as much revenue out of advertisers as possible, the NFL will schedule a pre-season Pats-Giants game. It will probably be hyped as the PATRIOT'S REVENGE and there is no doubt at all the Patriots will crush the Giants into dust reminiscent of Colleen's ashes. Then you can hold your heads up high after exacting revenge in a meaningless pre-season game.

Prevuze... where the internet comes for sports.

1:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love you, Prevuze!!!!!!!!!!!!

1:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bulldog--
In refrence to this line....
"And has anyone else had the horrible thought I have - Hope with her dizzyness standing up, etc....maybe she's having a generic pregnancy, too?"
Did you mean geriatric pregnancy?
Just wondering.



dazeisdum
also a very loyal Pats fan who didn't jump on the NE bus because they were winning. I remember when they lost....alot.

4:23 PM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

HA! Yeah, I meant geriatric.

After watching today's it looks to me like they shot the Ireland scenes and then spread some fake snow around for the Max/Chelsea/Stephanie/Nick scenes. For it to be that snowy there sure were a lot of leaves on the trees!

6:02 PM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

For it to be that snowy there sure were a lot of leaves on the trees!

Ah, yes, Bulldog.....winter LA-style. HAHAHAHA

Not only did they use the same scenery, but they probably re-used Colleen's "ashes", spray painting them white for snow. LOL

7:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just want to ask about how stir crazy Lucas can get when he claims he "didn't want to worry the kids."
The kids are 3 months old and extremely fat and healthy. They only worry they have is who to throw up on. Lucas is telling Sami he didn't want to worry her and didn't want to worry the kids. I can see Johnny and ALlie now in the crib having a pow wow about that guy with the crazed state that used to change their diapers. Allie: I'm so worried about him. Will we ever see him again?
Johnny: Fear not sister, for I'm sure he loves us very much....whereever he may be.

Give me a break.

12:23 AM  

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