Thursday, April 26, 2007

Queen Of The Gene Pool

Shawn and Belle smooch in bed. "Was it good for you," asks Shawn.

"I wouldn't exactly call it a barn-burner," says Belle, "How about you?"

"It wasn't as good as last time," says Shawn, "Sex with you is definitely better when you can't remember it."


Belle's phone rings. She figures it must be Marlena since she is the only one who knows where they are. Belle obviously hasn't had the opportunity to read the headline in this morning's Salem Inquirer, "SHAWN, BELLE SHACK UP ON TINDA LAO!"

Shawn answers. It's Mommy and Daddy. After some time-wasting small talk, Shawn tells them he's planning to go to Australia, "Belle says they have some great beer bongs there."

Belle corrects him, "No, I said they have billabongs."


The doorbell rings. Bo goes to get it. Hope tells Shawn she wants to talk about Willow.

Bo is with Billie at the door. He doggone-well wants to know who installed her security system in his house.

Lucas is at Chez Rouge talking to Sami on the phone. He promises he won't make any decisions without her. Kate finds him. He tells her he is still angry and doesn't want to see her. Kate says she needs his help, "Myth-Ick is going down the drain, which means you lose everything and so do I."

Lucas says, "Yeah, what would I ever do without that two-bedroom slum apartment I'm living in? "

Sami paces. Celeste arrives. She shows Celeste the coat. Only the coat has turned into a gas can. Sami holds the can and tells Celeste, "EJ left me a calling card. He wanted to make sure I know he is alive and that he is coming to get me."

Belle leaves while Shawn and Hope talk. Claire wanders aimlessly on the beach. Hope tells him Willow is in jail for breaking into their house. Shawn thinks it's his fault for getting involved with Willow, "She's a psycho."

"I know," says Hope, "You seem to have a knack for hooking up with them. But that's not something you should say about the mother of your child."

Shawn tells Hope he already knows Willow is claiming the child is his. She told him that when she and Phillip tracked them down. Shawn thinks Willow is lying. Hope isn't so sure.

Billie has no idea how the system got into Bo's house. Bo thinks she knows who did it. EJ. Billie insists he wouldn't compromise her like that. Bo tells her she's not off the hook. He accuses her of being "in bed" with EJ, "He's a DiMera."

"So is little evil Theo carver," says Billie.

Bo says they can forget all of EJ's other crimes, "But what about what he did to Steve?" A referee steps in and penalizes Bo for a low blow. Billie claims Bo doesn't have any evidence that EJ is involved. Bo nukes, "Stop defending that murderer."

"I am defending him because I don't think he did it," says Billie.

"OK," says Bo, "Then I guess our brother did it – Phillip."

Kate and Lucas argue. Kate says the office is in chaos. The directors need to talk to Lucas. If anyone's an expert on chaos, it's Lucas. Lucas doesn't want to talk about it. He doesn't care if Myth-Ick goes under.

Sami tells Celeste EJ didn't die in the fire. Celeste nearly faints, "You should have lit the match when you had a chance!"

Sami demands Celeste help her, "You owe me that."

Lucas thinks this is about the wedding. He insists he never wanted to work for EJ in the first place. Kate reminds him his employment record isn't so hot and he might have trouble finding another job if Myth-Ick goes under. Lucas is sick of her trying to camouflage the real reason she's here. He thinks it's all about Sami.

Sami wants Celeste to use her "in" with the DiMeras. She says Celeste put her up to this. Celeste says it's too late to put back what has been done. Sami begs her to talk to EJ, "Tell him I couldn't toss the match into the gasoline. I will do anything if he will just leave me alone."

"You don't know what you are saying," says Celeste, "He has made it clear he won't walk away from you." Sami begs.

Shawn reminds Hope what Willow did for a living. He says the kid could be anybody's. Hope says there is a good chance it is his. Shawn thinks Willow is trying to squeeze money out of her and Bo, "OMG! She has already done that, hasn't she?" Hope tells him she is paying for her medical care, but nothing else. Shawn says, "I don't believe it's my kid."

"Phillip does," says Hope.

Billie tells Bo to drop his accusations against EJ. She tells him Phillip called her about installing the system at Titan and asking questions. She gave him a follow up call and Victor told her he is out of the country. Bo panics. He thinks that means Phillip is after Shawn.

"But the good news," says Billie, "is every time he leaves the country, less of him comes back."

Celeste wishes she could help, but thinks EJ wouldn't see her even if she tried. Sami says, "You don't want me to end up like Lexie, do you? Unless that was your plan all along."

"No mon cherie."

"No thanks," says Sami, "The sherry here is too expensive. But you are my last chance."

"You have an alternative," says Celeste, "You could tell Lucas the truth."

"Are you out of your mind," asks Sami.

"Yes," says Celeste, "But that's irrelevant."

Bo tells Billie he had the house swept and they found it was bugged, "The Salem cops didn't find anything, so we called the FBI. They have more sensitive equipment. Plus they know what they are doing. Give Kate a message. If Phillip goes near Shawn I will hold her and you responsible."

Shawn says he knows Phillip and Willow are using each other. Hope says Phillip is giving Willow money. Willow has something Phillip wants, and the only thing that could be is the knowledge the baby is Shawn's. Shawn realizes it must be true. The baby must be his.

He decides his only strategy is to trash himself. He tells Hope he can't do anything right, "I married Mimi when I was in love with Belle and caught a hooker on the rebound from that."

That may not be all you caught," says Hope, "Do they have penicillin on Tinda Lao?

"Now I'm stuck in the South Pacific on the run and have another kid I can't see," says Shawn.

Bo rushes into the room and grabs the phone from Hope. He tells Shawn to get off the island right now.

Kate says, "My whole life is circling down the drain and all you can do is talk about Sami." She swears she won't try to stop the wedding, "Sami will ruin it herself. I want you to find EJ." Lucas don' wanna. He disowns her.

"You can't do that," says Kate, "You did that yesterday. It will ruin your schedule."


Billie arrives. She tells them somebody bugged Bo and Hope's house.

That's not news to Kate, "They've been bugging each other for years." Kate says she wouldn't know anything bout that. Billie says Phillip is responsible and she wants to know where he is. Kate huffs.

Celeste claims Lucas will understand. Sami wonders how telling him would change anything. "It will give EJ one less thing to hold over your head," says Celeste.

"It will give Lucas a reason to walk out on me," says Sami, "If I am lucky, EJ will kill me and put me out of my misery."

"You are expecting a child," says Celeste.

"One I may never see grow up," says Sami. She takes the gas can and leaves.

Celeste makes a call, "This is Celeste. I need to see you right away."

Kate says she doesn't know where Phillip is. Billie doesn't believe her. "He's a grownup," says Kate, "He doesn't need to consult me with everything he does."

"None of your kids are really grown up, Mom." Says Lucas. No comment.

Billie thinks Phillip has been spying on Bo and Hope. She thinks he has gone after Shawn and Belle, "What's wrong with this family? Are we all insane?"

"Yes," says Lucas, "Thanks to Mom, the Queen of the gene pool."

Kate insists she has always put her children first. "Yeah," says Lucas, "That's why we are all so happy."

Kate tells Lucas to ask Sami where EJ is – she insists she doesn't know where either he or Phillip are. Billie thinks both EJ and Phillip used Kate. Kate says she wouldn't exactly put it that way.

"No," says Lucas, "Because that would imply you're capable of being wrong."

"You're a fine example, Mom," says Billie, "No wonder we're all so screwed up."

Bo tells Shawn Phillip may be on the way to the island. Shawn passes the news to Belle. He says he will row to another island if he has to. Bo says he will wire money. Shawn refuses – he says he needs to take care of this himself. He will contact them. They hang up.

Bo and Hope try to assure themselves Shawn will be OK. Bo tells her about what Billie said – Phillip is out of the country. Hope wishes Marlena hadn't said anything about Shawn and Belle. Bo says nobody is at fault, "Marlena was just giving us good news. Our kids are safe and alive."

"But for how long," asks Hope.

Billie accuses Kate of knowing EJ was using her. Kate swears she had nothing to do with it, and tosses in a little grenade just for fun, "And perhaps it's time you got over Bo."

Billie explodes, "You think this is about Bo! I am upset because I trusted the wrong people. I got greedy and gave my system to the worst possible bidder. And, yes, I am upset about Bo, too. I have caused him enough trouble in his life and if he loses his grandchild..."

Kate stops her short, "Claire is my grandchild too!" Billie is upset because Kate betrayed her. She thinks they all should leave Myth-Ick. She's going to keep the investment money EJ gave her, though, because she earned it. Hopefully, not the old fashioned way. As she storms off she finishes Kate off, "If you have a problem with me keeping that money, SUE ME!"

"Don't plan on a lot of mother's day presents," says Lucas. Sami shows up. She and Lucas smooch just enough to make Kate lose her appetite. Kate tees off, but Lucas tells Sami to ignore her.

"That's like ignoring the plague," says Sami.

Kate tosses out her old accusations that Sami was with EJ at the cabin.

Sami says Kate knows she was with Lucas. Lucas defends Sami. Kate won't let up. She goes over the phone call where she heard someone call Sami's name. Kate thinks Sami drugged Lucas so she could be with EJ. Sami gets sick and runs to the restroom. Lucas gives Kate ten seconds to leave.

Kate puts her ten seconds to good use, "The longer you let her get away with it, the more likely you'll end up with a knife in your back."

Hope tells Bo Shawn already knew about Willow and the baby. Hope thinks they have to protect his baby for him. Bo will not be convinced it actually is Shawn's kid until they get DNA evidence, and also confirm the kid has the IQ of a retarded housefly. Hope isn't wiling to leave the baby's fate up to a bunch of strangers.

Shawn tells Belle it's not them against the world anymore. He knows they will be OK. They have to leave ASAP. Belle asks about Gabby. Shawn isn't worried about her. Belle says, "Maybe we shouldn't run any more. Let's stay and fight."

EERT! EERT! EERT!
CIRCULAR LOGIC ALERT!
EERT! EERT! EERT!

THEY ARE ON THE RUN. IF THEY STAY WON'T THEY STILL BE RUNNING?

Processing...
Checking source...
Source determined...
Source is Black-Kiriakis, Belle...
Canceling alert...

Reason for cancellation: With Belle, we'll take any logic we can get.

Belle says Australia is one thing. Going to another tiny island scares her. "We aren't going to make the same mistakes as last time," says Shawn, "We'll make different mistakes." He vows to fight Phillip and win. Belle trusts him with their lives. Shawn goes to see if he can find anyone leaving the island and bum a ride. Belle smiles. Why is anybody's guess.

Hope thinks Willow may have some maternal instincts. Bo wonders who else she's conned. Hope reminds him she paid for Jed's college tuition, "At least she showed some heart. I want to talk to her about what is best for the baby."

Bo sees the writing on the wall, "Like us raising it."

He walked right into the trap. Hope finishes him off, "That is a great idea, Bo! How would you feel about that?"

Bo recognizes he's been had, "I don't know that I have much choice. Remember, she's in jail for a reason – because she is dangerous."

Hope smirks, "Yeah. So am I."

Bo says, "Yeah, and I have the bruises to prove it."

Hope turns on the charm. Bo may not be totally convinced about raising the kid, but give her a few minutes.

Meanwhile, in the restroom, Sami cleans up and sobs, "Oh, what am I gonna do?" She turns around and looks at the stall doors as if they have the answer.

Lucas wants Kate to get out. She asks if Lucas is sure the baby is his.

Sami approaches a closed stall. She swings it open. EJ sits there unconscious wearing his charcoal suit. Waitaminute, that's not a suit.

SCREAM!

Lucas hears the scream and does what any red-blooded guy would do under the circumstances. He stands there like a bump on a log. FF.

Previews
========

Hope says, "There is another option." Willow asks, "What is the option?" Hope says, "Sign over your parental rights to Bo and me."

Duck asks, "What is your damn hurry, anyway?" Shawn says, "If we don't get off this island now, we could lose our daughter."

Belle says to Phillip, "I hate you. I hate what you have become. You will never get your hands on my daughter."

18 Comments:

Anonymous MomofDNA said...

I'm a little confused....Yesterday, it was a gas-soaked coat, today it's a gas can??

4:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It was a gas can yesterday too, but it took me watching my dvr recording a few times to know for sure. At first glance it did look more like a piece of clothing.

4:58 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

I'm a little confused....Yesterday, it was a gas-soaked coat, today it's a gas can??


It was a gas can yesterday too, but it took me watching my dvr recording a few times to know for sure. At first glance it did look more like a piece of clothing.


Sorry to confuse you, MODNA, and thanks to Anon for the clarification. Yesterday I couldn't tell what the heck it was. It was, at first, even hard to tell today. Let's face it, DOOL isn't going to win any Emmy's for great cinematography (or anything else for that matter). PLUS, Sami didn't hold it by the handle. She cradled it like it was a Gutenberg Bible or something.

5:17 AM  
Anonymous MomofDNA said...

Ah ha--thanks for clearing that up! Ya know, if I could stomach actually watching the show, I'd know these things....

Nah...I'd just be more confused, I think...

5:19 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

New defintion:
DOOLism=Dimwitted Observation On Life

Examples:
Billie thinks EJ is innocent because she has such a great track record when it comes to men.

Willow must be telling the truth about Shawn being her baby's father because Phillip believes her.

Always trust your siblings, they would never ever lie to you or stab you in the back or use you.

************

Will someone PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell the Days writers to make Stephanie stop calling Steve "Poppa".
Every time she says it she sounds like she's doing a bad Yentl impression...."poppa can you hear meeeeeeeee?"

Anyone else notice the gas can Sami and Celeste used was plastic?
How did it even survive the fire to show up in Sami's bed?

6:43 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Thank you, Deb! I've thought the same thing about the "poppa" tag. Every time she says it I have a "Fiddler" flash. And since when did Stephanie ever call Steve "Poppa"?

I also love DOOLism. That will come in handy.

It has probably occurred to me before, but it really hit home reading today's Prevuze.....Shawn knowingly slept with a hooker and didn't use protection!?! Do we really need more of his offspring polluting the gene pool? HAHAHA

6:50 AM  
Anonymous KOTU said...

All I hav to say is that Patch will have to get in line for that shock therapy - DROOL fans need that just to wake up.

LOL at the Prevuisms today especially, "Everytime Phil leaves the country, less of him returns."

Everyone had great pictures today. Although, I'm now quite sure I get the final tag about Green Shelle Sex on a Jolena picture?

6:57 AM  
Anonymous pizzywix said...

I'm not sure I get it either but the first thing went through my head was the thought of Shelle sex is enought to turn anybody green.

7:29 AM  
Blogger Bulldog said...

How did EJ know Lumi would be at Chez Rouge? He just went there, got in undetected and headed to the ladies room on the off chance they'd be there and Sami would use the restroom??

I had to stop reading or risk LOL over Lucas messing up his disowning schedule and the computer trying to compute Belle's (ill)ogic. HAHAHAHAHA

Great Prevuze and pictures today!

7:41 AM  
Blogger Frog said...

EJ's probably either in Sami's imagination or he's playing a trick on her. If he was well enough to stand around at the cabin yelling Sami's name he's well enough to try to gaslight her.

GASlight her! Get it? HAHAHAHAHA

This show is getting to me!

7:50 AM  
Anonymous MomofDNA said...

Hmmm....Celeste knew Lumi were there....

8:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad NOW Celeste is suggesting Sami tell Lucas the truth, after they tried to kill EJ. It seems that a better time to try that would be BEFORE you attempt to commit murder.

8:18 AM  
Blogger doolfanatic said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

8:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

First, Sami said she would tell Lucas the truth and now that is the worst thing that could happen.

And, then Lucas disses himself as not a grown-up.

10:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey at least it's not Passions! I have watched this show ever since I can remember and this is getting worse and worse everyday. Who actually comes up with this stuff? How twisted? Hey but's its good comedy!!!!

11:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have watched DOOL for many years like 31 years. I can only remember one time in history that this show sucked as bad as it does now. I am so sick of the Sami thing...the Shawn and Belle thing...can't they come up with something more mature, more realistic? Ok, I am sorry but truly...Days sucks right now!

4:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This site is great! Just happened on it a couple of days ago. I enjoy reading this site more than I actually like watching Days. Don't get me wrong. Still like to watch, but sometimes the acting is just...well you know. I totally agree with the Stephanie/Pappa thing. Thanks again for the awesome site!

8:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Review says:
'Kate says she doesn't know where Phillip is. Billie doesn't believe her. "He's a grownup," says Kate, "He doesn't need to consult me with everything he does." '

Does anyone else think this is hysterical???? Isn't she the one who 'stalks' her own son Lucas - just bash his choice in women? I guess that doesn't apply to Phillip????

Great writing today (as always)... I don't even feel guilty for not watching after reading your reviews - they're better than the actual show!!!!! Thanks!

9:08 PM  

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