Friday, April 13, 2007

BL-Abby

Patch and Mighty Joe Young have a standoff. The attendant comes in with the pizzas. "Ship 'em back," snorts Joe.

The attendant says they can't, "They were ordered on line."

"Hope you brought your wallet," chuckles Patch.

As Mighty Joe leaves he turns to Patch and says, "You know what you got comin' don't ya?"

"Yeah," pouts Steve, "I know what I got coming... PIZZA! " He and the rest of the loons dive in.

Dr. Parsons asks Nick about the dreaded hairbrush. Nick suggests it might be in the vault. He takes Parsons to check it out.

Abby asks if Chelsea is satisfied, "Now Nick will pay big-time unless you do something about it."

Gabby comes out of her closet full of toys to find Shawn at the door. Shawn hems and haws around and makes her suffer and then finally says, "Welcome aboard!" Gabby throws herself at him like a 350 pound linebacker going for a quarterback.

Belle wanders around her room chatting with Claire. The conversation is a little over Belle's head, but she gets the drift of it. "We'll have so much fun in Australia! There are koala bears and kangaroos and Hugh Jackman!" She answers a knock at the door and finds Duck there. He gives Belle a pile of kids' books.

"They're a little too advanced for me," says Belle, "But I'm sure Claire will enjoy them." Belle asks if there is any mail for her and Shawn. They're waiting for an answer to a letter they sent to the US.

Duck grumbles, "No mail went out. All mail goes through me and I never saw any mail from you or pretty boy."

Claire sits across the room and thinks, "Wolverine will be a step up from this jerk."

Max comes in to Chez Rouge. He walks up to Maggie and says, "Let's get this over with." Maggie wants to know what went on in New York. Max tells her it was entirely innocent. Maggie doubts it, "Is there something you'd like to confess." If Max wants the world to know what happened in New York, he has two choices. He can have the details of his trip broadcast on CNN, or, if he is really in a hurry, he can tell Maggie.

The brat insists she didn't force Nick to do anything. Abby accuses her of getting on the plane and going to New York to make Nick think he would never see her again, "You wouldn't know the truth if it bit you in the butt."

The brat says, "My dad is finally starting to trust me again. So why would I wreck that by telling him the truth?" If we search long enough, I'm sure we can find some logic somewhere in that statement.

Belle tells Duck about writing the letter. Duck swears no letter went out and leaves.

Gabby is attached to Shawn like she's covered in crazy glue. Slowly, Shawn manages to peel her off. She makes him promise he won't tell Duck about the trip. "I want what Belle has," says Gabby, "A beautiful baby, among other things."

Shawn pries, in his own cute little inept way, "So I guess you miss that... The baby part, that is."

"I have so much to give the right someone," says Gabby.

Shawn wants to make things clear, she will be on her own when they reach Australia.

Gabby's balloon busts, "Oh, yeah, we're mostly using my money and my boat to get there and you're going to ditch me."

Belle joins the party. Claire wanders around the island and plays with her new pet crocodile. Belle says, "It's funny. Duck handles all the mail around here. Did you know that? I think it's really strange we haven't gotten a response to our letter. What do you think happened, Gabby?"

The inmates gorge themselves on pizza. Patch leads the revolution, "Three cheers for Sal's Pizza Parlor! Oh, man, look at Retardo here. He's got more on his shirt than he's eaten. We may have to hose him down." He decides it's more fun, though, if they get a little on their clothes, so he smears some on his shirt.

Mighty Joe Young storms in, "OK, laughing boy, this gig's up. Eighty bucks. That's what your little party cost me. The hospital won't reimburse me since I was the one in charge when you ordered it." Six pizzas, eighty bucks, you do the math. Maybe that includes the tip.

"You shoulda used a coupon," says Patch, "Come on... Look at all these people and their happy faces, and here you are with this hang-dog face. Whazza matta you, huh?" Mighty Joe hauls off and swings his bat at Patch, who blocks him, "You need a quicker bat, slugger. We're going to have to send you down to the minors." If you're an actor, being on DOOL is the same thing.

Max gives his word nothing happened in New York. Maggie insists something happened, "A 24 year-old stayed with an 18 year old in her hotel room." Max agrees he should have informed Jack. "I know all about you," says Maggie, "You're a player."

"Excuse me?"

"That is the word, isn't it," says Maggie, "You were one of my best customers! I should have had a sign on one of my tables, 'Reserved for Max Brady!'" Wow. So I guess Chez Rouge is either Salem's den of sin or the eleventh commandment is 'Thou shalt not take thy date out to dinner.'

"All due respect," says Max, "This is not your decision to make."

The brat says it was Nick's prerogative if he changed his mind and took the hairbrush form the lab. Abby wonders what happens if he gets caught. "I dunno," says Chelsea, "Maybe you can figure it out when I'm rotting in prison. Dad and Hope have asked me to move in with them and be a family. I'm going to be their official bugsitter. Nothing is going to stand in the way of that. The brush is gone. I threw it away."

"You're sure it's gone," asks Abby.

"Yeah," says Chelsea, "Why wouldn't I be?"

Abby asks, "If it's gone, why is Nick wondering if he should return it?"

The brat thinks Abby heard Nick wrong. Abby says she told Nick to put it back, but he wouldn't do it.

"He can't do that," says Chelsea, "He doesn't have it."

"You're wrong," insists BL-Abby.

"No, I'm not," says the brat, "It doesn't make any sense unless he went behind my back and dug it out of the trash. Why would he do that?"

"He would do that if he thought you were using him," says BL-Abby, "This time he saw through you and did something about it."

Max says BL-Abby is old enough to decide who her friends are. Maggie says, "We aren't talking about friendship. You will break her heart because you have a history. You don't want to get on my bad side."

"I have to," says Max, "Your good side is impossible to find."

Mighty Joe Young tells Patch to let go of him. Kraft comes in and tells Mighty Joe to stand down. She knows what happened. She will see to it he is reimbursed. She kicks him out.

Dr. Kraft walks over to Patch, "I'm starting to think you are crazy. You understand using my laptop makes us all look bad."

"I did it for them," says Patch as he gestures toward the patients, "Look at 'em. They look alive for once. Those pizzas were cheaper than stuffing their faces full of happy pills." Dr. Kraft says Patch is on his own. She has been reassigned since she can't control him.

Shawn thinks Duck was wrong. Belle wonders if the letter got through, why they haven't heard from their families. "Well," she cackles, "I guess I'll just have to write the letter again."

Shawn asks, "Gabby, you did send that letter, didn't you?" Gabby stares and sweats. She offers to go look for the letter to see if it got lost, and leaves.

Belle says, "Things aren't adding up. If I could add, that is." Shawn argues. Belle accuses Gabby of losing the letter on purpose.

BL-Abby thinks Chelsea is using Nick, "Nobody lies like you do, now that Mimi has left town."

The brat points out Nick lied to her as Lonely Splicer and slept with her mom.

Once again, BL-Abby's mouth runs far ahead of her mental capabilities, "He was desperate to tell you about it the second it happened but he was just so scared of you..."

"Hang on a second," says the brat, "You knew? You knew he slept with my mom and didn't say a word? Is that what you call being my best friend? You lie like everyone else. You don't give a damn about me, do you?"

Nick comes up, "What's going on?"

"BL-Abby was just leaving," says the brat, "I'll see you around. Maybe one day. Goodbye." BL-Abby cries and leaves. Nick asks what happened.

Patch accuses Dr. Kraft of asking for a transfer. She says she didn't. They have ordered a new course of treatment. Dr. Kraft doesn't know what that treatment will be. Patch asks about Marlena stepping in. Dr. Kraft says, "They won't do that. They want you to see a psychiatrist. I'm going to be working with children now. So I'll be seeing you from time to time."

Steve says he's sorry. Dr. Kraft thinks he's a good man who has been dealt a bad hand.

"No," says Patch, "My hand is OK. I was dealt a bad eye."

Chelsea gives Nick the cold shoulder. She says BL-Abby told her she knew about him and Billie. The brat doesn't think they can ever get past that. He says he risked everything when he took the brush. She tells him, "BL-Abby said you still have the brush. Did you fish it out of the garbage? Did you?"

Shawn and Belle bicker. Belle thinks Gabby can't handle the thought of never seeing Shawn again. Shawn admits Gabby flirts, "But I hear she flirts with everybody."

Belle says Duck told her to watch out for Gabby or she would lose Shawn, "Still don't believe she is after you?"

Nick says, "If you're asking whether I believe you, you know I do." Nice try, Nick.

"That's not the question," says the brat, "You still have your doubts. I don't blame you. If you make enough mistakes, they're more like a bad habit. If there is a chance you don't believe me... If you think I am using you, you need to tell me. Yes or no. Look at me. Do you believe I am the person who set fire to my dad's house?"

BL-Abby meets Max at Chez Rouge. Max tells her about his little chat with Maggie. BL-Abby is off limits.

"You mean you and me?"

"That's what she said."

BL-Abby says she will talk to her. Max tells her not to bother. He isn't going to fight this.

All Dr. Kraft knows for sure is that someone with power and money is interested in Patch. She asks him to at least look like he is trying to cooperate. She only wants the best for him. She tells him to take care and leaves.

"Have fun with the kiddies," says Patch. He wanders around the room. Mighty Joe Young comes in and announces the party is over, "MOVE IT! All except you, Long John, your party is just getting started."

Godzilla walks into the room and circles behind Patch. Patch says he didn't get the invite. "You think you're real smart, don't you," says Mighty Joe.

"That's not what I'm thinking right now," says Patch.

"Maybe you're thinking you should have listened to me."

The Bickersons keep it up. Belle just knows Gabby didn't send the letter, "And you still want her to go to Australia with us?"

The brat presses. Nick keeps silent. "OMG," she says, "You do think I did all that." She huffs off. Nick chases, stops and agonizes. He opens his bag and pulls out the brush. Dr. Parsons comes up behind him. He says they can't find the brush. He will call Dr. Hackett and tell him it's missing. He leaves.

Nick says to himself, "I don't think that brush is going to turn up anytime soon."

Max says they can't sneak around. BL-Abby says they won't sneak. Max says they can still be friends, "I think..."

BL-Abby interrupts, "I don't care what you think, Max, or anybody else. But you know what I do think? Mr. Max Brady, I think that you're one big jerk."

Prevuze

Chelsea stands in the dark. All the people she believed in never believed in her, "If you guys want to play that way I'll show you how it's done." She calls Max and tells him her car died and asks him to lend her a hand.

Max hesitates but caves in, "Oh, what the heck, I'll be right there."

"I'll make it worth your while," says the sultry snot. She hangs up, "Well BL-Abby, my best friend, let's see how you like feeling betrayed." FF.


Previews
========

Chelsea strokes Max' hair, "What you need is someone who knows as much about life as you do." Hot kiss in the whiz-bang scene flash.

Willow tells Nick, "I hope you don't believe everything people say about me. You just have to give me a second chance like you gave Chelsea."

Lucas asks, "What do you want, a drumroll or something?" EJ says, "I think we can save the fanfare until I get back with my new bride." Kate looks on.

Celeste tells Sami, "The world will be a much safer place because EJ will be roasting in hell."

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

ok i'm a little slow today
what does the BL stand for infront
of BL-Abby....

9:13 AM  
Blogger Vampire Bear said...

Celeste tells Sami, "The world will be a much safer place because EJ will be roasting in hell."

Wow, a preview of the next episode and a review of what she already told Sami this last Tuesday. Writers didn't have to dig far bag to reuse that material. :)

9:14 AM  
Blogger Vampire Bear said...

hey bear anonymous. prevuze added BL to abby to make BLABBY because she has been blabby lately.

9:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoa, I'm actually more of a Chelsea/Max fan (they seem more suited to one another) so like to see how that goes. And when will Sami meet EJ already?

9:38 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

hey bear anonymous. prevuze added BL to abby to make BLABBY because she has been blabby lately.

Thank you, VB. She has certainly been blabby lately and today I think she set a world record.

Hmmm... maybe I should have made it BLAbby. That might not have been as confusing. On my first post this morning, I made it Bl-Abby and that didn't even make sense to me, so I changed it.

9:51 AM  
Blogger Vampire Bear said...

By the way - were you saying that $80 is a lot for pizza? It seems like a very fair price. Even assuming that a pizza were $12, that's $72 - and it's hard to find a decent sized pizza for that so it would be more like $13 or $14 - so $78 or $84? Hmm. Little bear brain overworking.

9:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

thank you prevuze and vampire bear
I knew it was a very simple answer to the BL,,, it now makes sense BLAbby... I was thinking on the lines of "Big Loser" Abby..oh well, i told you i was a little slow today

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very funny comments today! Thank you - you brought a little laughter into my boring work day!
One note, WHY do they keep doing the very same things???? Chelsea, Abby, Nick, Stev etc... These storylines haven't moved forward in a week!

10:28 AM  
Blogger Cinder Ella said...

So has anyone noticed how the writers are totally ripping off 'One Flew Over the Cookoo's Nest' with the Patch in the looney bin storyline? Wonder if Jack Nicholson watches DOOL?
I love this site, by the way!

10:58 AM  
Blogger Quiet one said...

Yes, Cinder Ella, I was thinking the same thing. So now they can't even re-use their OWN storylines!!!
I'm so sick of this show, I only keep up because of Prevuze!!

11:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just commented to my sister - I'm surprised some mental health facility hasn't sued DAYS for defamation of character on behalf of their patients. Lord, DAYS has thrown in just about every cliche in the book!

Loved the pictures and LOL at the idea of little Claire off playing with her pet crocodile while her clueless parents bicker.

Can't wait for tomorrow's special edition.

11:59 AM  
Blogger Quiet one said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

11:59 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

By the way - were you saying that $80 is a lot for pizza? It seems like a very fair price. Even assuming that a pizza were $12, that's $72 - and it's hard to find a decent sized pizza for that so it would be more like $13 or $14 - so $78 or $84? Hmm. Little bear brain overworking.

"You shoulda used a coupon"
--Steve Johnson 04/13/07

12:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So I just wanted to say Bravo to Prevuze. I was an Early Edition reader before they closed down shop and I didn't enjoy it nearly as much. Now I don't feel like I'm the only one making snarky comments when I watch this innane but addictive drivel. Thanks!

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You should have used a coupon!!!! LMAO, Bulldog, I think your right, it must have been Pizza Hut. We ordered Pizza last night (family combo and it was 37.00 ugh)

10:38 AM  

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