Wednesday, November 15, 2006

You Were Expecting Neil Diamond?

Kayla's deathwatch continues. Kayla wheezes. Stephanie frets. Max arrives. Frankie fills him in.

Mimi says Patch is an amazing man. Max says, "He always has been. Except for when he was a kid. Then he was an amazing kid. He's the one who got Mom and Pop to adopt Frankie and me. But they forgave him a long time ago."

Frankie says, "He didn't just marry Kayla. He married the whole Brady family. He's always been kind of kinky."

Kayla says she needs to go to sleep. Patch begs her to stay awake. She says, "You're a good man. You always have been. Except for when you were a kid. Then you were a good kid."

"You're delirious," says Patch. She says he's everything to her. He reassures her, "John is on the way with the serum."

Victor tells Belle he and Claire had a wonderful time. A very distraught Sami arrives. She tells Belle about John and Marlena. She doesn’t know what happened. Marlena took a flying leap and no one knows where she is.

John rushes into the airport with the serum. Roman and Abe are waiting. Abe tells John the rescuers found Marlena's cell phone and parachute, but not her.

Marlena sleeps in a cabin. She wakes with a start. She tries to get up but her ankle gives her trouble. She tries the phone. Dead. She turns to see Sasquatch coming in the door.

Patch begs Kayla to stay with him. He asks if she remembers their wedding, "There was a poem or a Bible verse or something. Corinthians." Kayla is too tired. He begs, "Love is patient... kind..." He wants to hear the whole thing.

John tells the guys about Marlena's leap into oblivion. Abe gives him the report on the Cessna, "It was tampered with."

Victor goes into action, "I'll call in helicopters, the Mounties, CBC action news..."

Sami says there is a rescue team there already, and then freaks out, "It's dark, snowing and cold. There is no way anyone could survive out there."

Pizza-eyes Marlena hops over and grabs a poker as Bigfoot walks in.

Shawn boogies and works on the plumbing as Willow comes in with a suitcase and says, "Is it OK if I put my stuff in the closet or do you want me to put it on the roof in case Belle comes by?"

Shawn apologizes for the way he treated her, "I will make it up to you. Starting right now..." He starts to kiss her.

Willow heads him off at the pass, "I don't think we should do that any more. If I can't be your girlfriend, I won't be your whore."

"OK, then you can be my girlfriend," says Shawn.

The girls leave Claire with Victor as they run out. He takes her in to spend more time with the mummy.

John wonders how someone could have sabotaged his plane. Abe tells him the mechanic found a glove in the engine compartment.

Marlena wields the poker and says, "You have kidnapped the wrong girl. Drop it!" Sasquatch drops his axe. Marlena says, "Drop the hood. I want to get a look at you." Bigfoot removes the hood. Marlena gasps, "It's you!"

Patch begs Kayla to hold on. He takes over and completes the Bible verse. Kayla joins in. Kayla remembers. Kayla sweats. Kayla flatlines, "I'll love you for all the Days Of Our Lives..." She passes out.

Patch yells, "KAAAYYYLLLAAA," and then screams for a nurse.

Shawn backpedals. "This is a business arrangement," says Willow, "I let you stay at the 'Y' and you can repay the debt."

The phone interrupts their spat. Willow has a conniption when she finds out it's Belle. Belle tells Shawn about Marlena. She asks him to pick up Claire.

Willow asks if she has to go into hiding. "I have to pick up Claire," says Shawn, "When I get back, it would be best if you weren't here." Willow's lip quivers.

John thinks Wells and Lockhart sabotaged the plane. Abe tells him to back off. "After I find Marlena I'm gonna drop both of them."

Roman says, "Dropping Marlena is enough for one night. Don't go off half-cocked."

"I'm fully cocked," says John.

Marlena gasps, "You're Smokey Robinson! It's a miracle! "

"You were expecting Neil Diamond," asks Smokey.

Half of Salem watches through Kayla's death window. Hope fills in OMB and Caroline, "Her heart stopped." Caroline freaks and screams for her. Stephanie cries.

Dr. Myers gives up, "I'm calling it." He contemplates his degree on the wall from the Lexie Carver Institute of Quackery and Junk Medicine and then looks over at the clock. "19:43. There is nothing we can do."

Patch wails over the body.

Shawn arrives to pick up Claire. Victor tells him to come back later. Shawn brushes him aside and heads for Claire. Victor stops him.

Marlena is starstruck. The Smokster has her sit down. She tells him about her jump. She says she overreacted when he came in. She thought he was trying to kill her. He says the phone was knocked out by the storm. Marlena remembers John. She asks for a cell phone so she can call him. Smokey says he can't get a signal. He gets up to prepare Marlena some food. Marlena gives a blank stare and says, "Unbelievable!"

Smokey yells from the next room, "I second that emotion! "

Belle meets John at the airport. Sami comes in right behind her and screams at John, "How could you put her in danger again? How could you come home without her?"


Max screams at no one in particular, "They just can't give up!" Bo rushes in proud as punch that he has the serum. He gets the bad news – It's too little too late. Kayla has gone to that big soap opera in the sky.

Steve grabs sleeping beauty and plants a big one on her.

Victor reminds Shawn, "This is my house. What's left of it, anyway. You stay here while I go get Claire." He goes to get her and brings her out. Shawn leaves. Victor goes to the secret room.

The mummy caresses a picture of Claire. Victor says, "Don't worry, she'll be back, and the sight of you will probably scare the daylights out of her again."

Sami unloads on John. Roman gets caught in the crossfire. Sami wonders why John didn't stop Marlena from jumping. John says, "Stopping your mother when she has made up her mind is kind of like trying to stop you." Sami's wrath fills the room.

Patch gives Kayla a kiss-CPR combo. Flashback to another time, another kiss. We pan through several scenes of body parts and pores oozing sweat and then their wedding.

Sleeping beauty wakes! "Welcome back from the dead," says Patch.

Max and Mimi watch. Bo tells Stephanie, "Patch saved her." They talk about miracles. Frankie takes Stephanie out for some fresh air.

Hope hugs Bo, "I meant it when I said I want you to come home."

Bo asks, "What are we going to do about Lockhart?"

Hope says, "He'll always come in handy to threaten you with every time your butt gets out of line, Mister."

Smokey bandages Marlena's ankle and says he rents this place whenever he wants to get away, "I'm here working on my new CD, which will be in stores in time for Christmas. There are no interruptions here, except for the occasional nitwit who jumps out of a plane."

Marlena gasps, "I just remembered, you are a Kennedy Center honoree next month. It's another lifetime achievement award to honor people who have lived so long we don't know what else to do with them."

"And what a coincidence," says Smokey, "The ceremony just happens to be on NBC."

Marlena says, "So there's your new CD, and the Kennedy Center honors... Have we plugged everything? "

"No," says Smokey, "There's my new single, but we'll get to that later."

Smokey autographs her bandage. Marlena wonders about getting in touch with John. Smokey just happens to have a working PDA. She tells him to contact Abe at the Salem PD. Smokey goes for his PDA. Marlena says, "I hope John got the serum back to Salem, not to mention those 50 cases of Labatt Beer... and I hope he doesn't get them mixed up."

Father Roman lectures his little girl, "Be careful how you treat the people you love."

Sami hears his – choke – touching and meaningful words. The heavens open and a beam of sunlight falls on her face. In an instant, Sami completely turns her life around. She falls to her knees in repentance, "You're right dad. I'm going to be a better daughter to you and Mom." Hallelujah!

John wishes he hadn't put off the wedding. Abe rushes in and tells them the serum worked on Kayla. "And they found Marlena! You'll never guess who's got her!" John snaps his teeth.

Mimi wishes she had role models, "I miss being a Brady. It's been, what – a week? " She asks if Max ever found love like Steve and Kayla's. He doesn't think he has. He asks about her. She runs through the litany of her love snafus.

Max says, "You're a good person, for a chronic liar. You have been there for me."

Hope says she told Patrick it was over. He wasn't happy. She doesn’t care. They will be together as parents but nothing else. "Nice," says Bo, "I love you, Fancy Face."

Shawn, Sami and Belle are back in his place. They talk about Marlena and Kayla. Sami has to go get the party ready. Shawn wonders what the party is for. Sami tells him it's a thank-you party at the penthouse grill for John and Marlena. Shawn says Victor was acting weird. "He always acts weird," says Sami.

Shawn tells Belle, "Keep an eye out."

"If I do that, will I have to wear a Patch, too," asks Belle.

Belle and Sami leave. Shawn wanders around the new place. Willow comes back in. Shawn asks, "Did Belle and Sami see you.

"I hid until they left," growls Willow. She asks, "Is it OK if I take a shower, or should I stand under a rain gutter with a bar of soap?"

Victor drinks and rambles, "Claire needs time to readjust and she will be yours again. No one will ever take her from you again, Phillip."

John shows up at Smokey's place. He took a page from Marlena's book and had them fly him over the place and then he jumped. He tells her about Kayla. Happy-happy. Smokey sits down at the piano. He plays and sings, "I love your face" as John carries Marlena around the room and sways.


Hope tells Bo to back off. She says Patrick will be involved in the child's life, but not hers. She forbids him to fight with Patrick, "If he's involved in all this, he's dangerous and I can't risk losing you." Bo hears, but does he listen?

Abe and Roman pop in. They announce Marlena's safe. Abe pulls Bo aside. He tells him the airport faxed him a copy of the maintenance report, "Sabotage. They found a glove."

"The dynamic duo," says Bo, "Wells and Lockhart." Abe wants Bo in on the fight. "You got it," says Bo. Abe leaves. Bo grunts.

Patch wishes Kayla sweet dreams. He's staying right there with her. He turns and asks the doctor how bad it really is. Dr. Myers acts like he knows something about medicine, "It looks like there wasn't any permanent damage. Most likely she will recover. As a doctor, or at least as someone pretending to be one, every once in a while I witness miracles – things that defy any medical explanation. You are her miracle. Stick close to her. Your presence is as important as any medicine. And it's more important than any quack who declares his patients dead at the drop of a hat." He leaves.

Patch goes back to Kayla, "Looks like you're stuck with me, Sweetness." Pan in on Sweetness.


Tek says, "I was going through EJ Wells' bank statement and found this." John says, "It'll not only tell us who he is but why the hell he wants to destroy our lives."

Hope says, "Possibly Steve and Kayla would be together right now." Bo says, "It's a turning point for us, too."

Kayla says to Steve, "Now that I know you remember I don't ever want us to be apart ever again."

John and Marlena sit in a plane. John says, "You and I aren't innocent bystanders anymore, Doc. This has become personal and I'm not walking away from it."


Anonymous applecheeks said...

ROFLMAO over Prevuze' riff on the plug for NBC, Smokey, and the Kennedy Honors show.

This was primo Prevuze today! The pictures: Batman & Robin, Smokey and the Botox song, the Canadian interpreter - and the Prevuisms: the degree from LCIQJM - were all fantastic. I wonder though, was the interpreter for all of Canada or just the "lower" provinces? HAHA

Note to Marlena: You don't have to stay in Canada to see DOOL a day early, just log onto Prevuze!!!

6:49 AM  
Anonymous applecheeks said...

Hey, Smokey! If you can't get a signal for your cell phone, you won't get one for your PDA either.

6:50 AM  
Blogger Bulldog said...

Holy hysterics, Batman!! I completely lost it when I got to Lexie's "Institute of Quackery and Junk Medicine" diploma. HAHAHAHHA

Question: Patrick was standing in the deathwatch room of the hospital when Squints and Marlena left for the airport. He called Jr. over to take a message about them leaving to EJ. He surely waited for EJ's reply. So how would he have gotten to the airport to sabotage the plane before they took off? I know, I'm trying to apply logic to Daze and it's futile.

Too many great Prevueisms to go into today but I loved Hope's Legend of the Creep and the Canadian interpreter. HAHAHAHA

GREAT Prevuze!!!

7:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Smokey yells from the next room, "I second that emotion! "


8:31 AM  
Anonymous MomofDNA said...

What I think is ridiculous (well, one of many) is that, while watching yesterday's episode, when Patrick gives the envelope back to Shawn, it's UNSEALED! You'd think Shawn would open it, be a little curious, wouldn't he?

8:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:12 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"This post has been removed by a blog administrator."

Racist comments will not be tolerated on this blog!

12:22 PM  

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