Thursday, March 11, 2010

Carly's Turkey Baster

Sami joins Rafe in his office. He asks where Sydney is. "I forget which babysitter I dumped her on," says Sami.

Rafe turns and concentrates on Clark's conversation and leaves Sami in the dust. Sami asks, "Rafe, can you take a break right now?" Busy Rafe no can do.

Carly trolls at the dock and peers out at the river. Vivian walks up behind her, "Do everyone a favor... jump!"

Arianna assures EJ Rafe and her are OK. EJ says life is treating him well and Arianna say she's is fine, too. This is known as small talk, or in some circles, time-wasting filler. EJ says he wants to discuss something with her.

Nicole rambles, "So they still don't know who took Sydney? When I woke up at the hospital and knew my daughter was gone... since then I've been trying to figure out who did it. I've been wracking my brain."

"At least your brain has a small rack," says Chloe.

"This is just a big nightmare," says Nicole, "It's all my fault."

Sami reminds Rafe he didn't come home last night Rafe grumbles, "I don't like sleeping under the same roof as EJ." Sami asks to talk privately, but Mr. G-Man wants to get back to the case.

Sami says she understands, "I'll be at home." She leaves.

Clark turns and says, "I talked to the president of the board of realtors."

"I thought he was being uncooperative," says Rafe

"He was," says Clark, "but this time I went to him with the top of my blouse unbuttoned."

"Dang," says Rafe, "I tried that and it got me nowhere."

Sami rushes back in, "What is this case about? It's about Sydney isn't it?" WTH? I guess one of her personalities just got the news bulletin.

Victor gets off the phone with the governor as Daniel comes in. He turns to Daniel, "What's so important you couldn't talk to me on the phone?"

"Yesterday you asked what Melanie was to me," says Daniel, "She's not just a patient."

"So," says Victor, "How long have you been sleeping with her?"

"VICTOR!"

"Don't be so shocked," says Victor, "She was no prude when she married my son. God knows you're not."

Chloe says they still don't know who took Sydney. Nicole says she just can't place the voice she heard, "When they catch her, If there is a God she will be put in the same cell with me."

God chimes in, "Oh, I'm here all right. And one thing I know is you'll never be put in the same cell with me. My cell is called heaven."

Anna hurries around and starts to leave. She opens the door and stalls, "EJ's right... you'd better not have left anything back." We pan to the boots hiding under the couch.

Rafe sends Clark out. Sami babbles about the information she kept from him and he reminds her they've been over this before. Who knew? Sami says she's happy Sydney is back but says she can see through Rafe and knows she hurt him.

Brady strolls outside the pub and contemplates the unwanted ring.

Inside, EJ tells Arianna he feels he's gotten to know her and likes what he sees.

Arianna reacts, "Did this just get a little creepy?"

"No," EJ assures her, "I'd like you to come to work for me."

Victor bounces off the walls, "WHAT? Oh God no, Daniel! Please tell me you sold sperm when you were a starving medical student and it got into Carly's turkey baster. You can't have slept with her... You're sill here. I thought black widows devoured their mates!"

Daniel gives Victor the history and says he just now heard about Melanie being his daughter. Victor asks, "So what are you doing? Passing out cigars?"

Daniel says, "I don't know what to do next."

Victor says, "Well, my boy, you've come to the right place."

Vivian and Carly banter. Carly says she thinks after it's all over she'll probably go to prison.

Nicole makes threats about what she would to to the kidnapper if she ever got hold of her. Chloe reminds her she'd better cool it or she could wind up being in jail longer. "That fantasy helps pass the time in here," says Nicole, "I hate this place."

"It's prison."

"Sometimes," says Nicole, "I do multiplication tables to keep from going insane."

"Apparently you haven't done enough of them," says Chloe, "You're stuck in here. You don't have a choice."

Nicole snorts, "Like hell I don't."

Rafe says he wishes Sami hadn't held the ransom note information from him, "But when you're dealing with a baby's life what works is what matters."

Sami says she is glad Sydney is safe at home, "But I want back every minute that I missed out on with her."

"I want you back, too," whines Sami, "You and me. Like a team."

"We are a team," says Rafe, "Kind of like the Washington Nationals. We love each other right? Isn't that what matters?"

Vivian says rumor has it Melanie pointed the finger at Carly for the shooting. Carly hisses, "Don't you have an orphanage to burn down or something?"

Vivian reminds her, "Daniel and Melanie hate you."

"You're right," says Carly, "But the only way I survived Lawrence was to hope the future would be better. Melanie and Daniel will make each other happy. Maybe I'll be in jail, maybe not. You and I know what happened. You were going to kill her. So... me in prison satisfies your need for revenge and you leave Melanie alone, all right?"

Daniel beats himself up for letting Melanie grow up with a pervert who pimped her out, when she could have grown up with a perverted groper instead. He tells Victor Melanie didn't take the news well and now wants no part of Carly. Victor advises him not to let his daughter walk away from him.

Sami grovels, "I love you so much. But look what happens to love when you do stupid things." Rafe tells her how much he admires her and what a great mom she is, how she farms her kids out to the best babysitters and ships them off to Europe when she's tired of them. She asks if he trusts her like he did before. Rafe gives her a non committal answer and that sends Sami right off the rails. Rafe calms her down, and they talk about their future together. I want that more than anything," says Sami.

Arianna doesn't get it. EJ extols DiMera enterprises, assures her they are legit and gives her his card. Brady walks in and watches, "How about that? She says no to me and yes to him."

Chloe wonders how Nicole plans to get out of prison. "I don't know," says Nicole, "Tell me about you and Daniel."

"We're kind of going through something," says Chloe, "I thought I was pregnant, but wasn't. Could I borrow your fake pregnancy foam rubber ball? " Chloe says she can deal with it, but Daniel doesn't want to talk about it and he made an appointment for her to see a shrink, "He thinks I've been going but I haven't gone at all."

Nicole walks right into it, "Is Daniel OK with not having kids?"

"Surprise... he's a dad." Chloe tells her Carly is the mother.

Anna searches for the boots. We pan to the couch.

Sami just can't leave well enough alone, "Agent Clark is fairly attractive."

"I hadn't noticed."

"What," asks Sami, "Do you have blinders on? I just wouldn't want you to look at her and think, 'she's hot and doesn't lie like Sami does.'"

"It's not gonna happen," says Rafe.

"Even though I went behind your back with EJ?"

"Yeah," says Rafe, "You did. You made that choice and it's something you've gotta live with."

EJ says he has to go pick up Sydney, "One of her parents should spend some time with her." He asks Arianna to remember what he said. Brady walks up. He and EJ banter about Sydney, and then EJ walks off.

"Nice guy," snarks Brady, "We should go bowling together sometime. What did he want?"

"He wanted to give me a job."

"That leads me to something I want to ask," says Brady. He gets serious, "Arianna... will you... will you... have some coffee with me?" They rush out. So... I guess Arianna's on break for a while.

Daniel says he will try to have a relationship with Melanie.

Victor says, "You can be the guy she turns to when my son treats her like a jerk. I cherished every day I had with Bo and I have a new appreciation for Melanie. She has backbone. I will welcome her into this house and keep Vivian in line."

Vivian assures Carly she is fond of Melanie. "Are we square or not," asks Carly.

"Lets put it this way," says Vivian, "If you went to prison, I would be so satisfied. Is that clear?"

"Crystal."

Anna finds the boots. EJ calls and asks why she hasn't turned off her phone, "Aren't you on the plane? It's supposed to take off in a few minutes."

"If you thought my phone was off, why did you call," asks Anna.

EJ loses patience, "Are you on the plane our aren't you?"

Sami says she's glad Sydney is back, "But tell me I didn't screw this up so bad that you're not part of us."

Brady and Arianna rush into the Java Café. They find a seat and Brady says, "I have something to ask you."

Chloe has dropped the 'Melanie bomb' on Nicole, "So Daniel didn't even know it but he was saving the life of his own daughter."

"Whoa," gasps Nicole, "You need to make Daniel forget about Carly and Melanie. You need to make him focus on you and only you. Chloe thinks that is awful advice. Nicole doesn't, "You need to keep him on a short leash."

Anna tells EJ she's on the plane and has to shut off her phone. She hangs up, grabs the boots and tries to stuff them in the suitcase. They don't fit, "Now what am I gonna do." There are several trash cans on the way to the airport. Just sayin...

Rafe asks Sami to stop beating herself up. He gets a call from Clark, who says she found a place an absentee owner rents out for cash. She gives him the address and Marshall Dillon heads for dry gulch. Sami stares and then rushes out after him.

McTavish announces visiting hours are over. Chloe and Nicole hug. Nicole says, "Give Sydney a kiss for me."

Chloe asks, "You know where she belongs?"

"Yeah," says Nicole, "With me miles away, but that will never happen. If you see Brady thank him for wanting me to know about Sydney. Tell him... don't tell him anything."

Arianna hangs on her seat ready for Brady's big question. Brady launches into it, "Arianna... will you split a piece of chocolate cake with me?"

Arianna has had it, "This isn't funny. You know why I turned you down. But my instincts suck. So top the jokes and ask again."

"No."

Could this get any more tedious?

Victor finds Carly and Vivian at the dock. Carly isn't exactly thrilled to see him, "I just went a few rounds with Vivian but you are the cherry on top of my sundae."

Victor can't wait to take a shot, "I just talked to Daniel. He tells me Melanie is your daughter. You sure get around."

"I'm the town pump," says Carly, "I slept with everyone. Except you, even though we were married. I have my standards."

Daniel asks about Chloe's visit with Nicole, "What's a prison visiting room like?"

"It's awful. You're thinking about Carly winding up in a place like that, aren't you? Are you worried about her? I know I am."

EJ returns to Sami's place with Sydney. EJ senses something is wrong but, hey, it's Sami and something's always wrong. He asks if she saw Rafe, "Did he tell you why he didn't come home?"

Sami broods, "He doesn't have to say it. He's hurt by what I did."

Chloe asks again about Carly. Daniel says Carly is a big girl, "She has Bo in her corner. I just want to think about us and our wedding. I can't wait to marry you." Daniel hugs. Chloe stares.

Victor advises Carly not to get in his face. Vivian says, "Carly realizes if she's in prison I will sleep well. Shall we go?" They leave.

Carly calls Bo and leaves a message, "I'm glad you didn't answer, because I don't want to argue about this. Today at the hearing, I'm pleading guilty. Of course by telling you in advance, I'm telegraphing my punch bigtime. So instead of just springing it on you at the hearing, this will give you an opportunity to try to talk me out of it and you probably will, but only after we endlessly yammer about it."

Arianna's getting a little tired of Brady's game, "I didn't realize it was a one time offer."

Brady keeps it up, "What are you talking about?"

"You said 'no.'"

Mr. Entertainment says, "Man, I'm always doing that. I always say no when I mean yes." He takes a knee.

Arianna is frustrated, "I should punch you in the nose." She should punch him somewhere else, if you ask me.

romantic Brady asks, "Why don't you just marry me instead?"

"YES!"

They grab each other and twirl around the room giggling and sucking face. It's good thing the tables at the Java Café are so small or they'd really make a scene.

Nicole whines, "Do I have to go back to my cell."

"I guess you can stay here for a while," says McTavish, "And scrub the floor." She holds up a toothbrush, "With this. And think about this the next time you're tempted to attack an inmate."

McTavish leaves. Nicole begs no one in particular, "Someone please get me out of here."

EJ advises Sami to concentrate on Sydney. "Rafe said the same thing," says Sami.

EJ hands Sydney to her, "Nothing else matters. Just focus on your family. Everything will be fine."

Rafe and Clark, otherwise known as Not-so-Smart and Agent 99, stalk outside the hideout. "I'm going in," whispers Rafe, "Cover me." J. Edgar Loser kicks the door in and screams...

"FBI!!!"

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9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Sami/Rafe relationship is awful.
Sami is pathetic and needy, Rafe is self-righteous and bossy. Dool if this is your money couple you are screwed-up ! (and don't get me start with the lack of romantic chemistry between the actors, all i see is a little girl with his father or a lecturing big brother).

5:53 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

"Rafe, can you take a break right now?" Busy Rafe no can do.

Busy passive aggressive Rafe no can do. Sorry but that sort of behavior just drives me nuts. Instead of turning the screws, just deal with it like a mature adult. Geez!

“I've been wracking my brain."

"At least your brain has a small rack," says Chloe.

Chloe and Nicole conversing = small brain summit.

"He was," says Clark, "but this time I went to him with the top of my blouse unbuttoned."

I didn’t think it was possible but the DOOL writing team has hit an all time low. They have penned egregiously sexist dialogue for a woman who is a law enforcement official for the government of the good ole U S of A. Great job! When it comes to quality television, you guys are on the cutting edge.

"She's not just a patient."

"So," says Victor, "How long have you been sleeping with her?"

Gotta love Victor!! That turkey baster line is a real hoot too!!

"Sometimes," says Nicole, "I do multiplication tables to keep from going insane."

"Apparently you haven't done enough of them."

Right on Prevuze!

Arianna doesn't get it.

Neither do I. Why would EJ offer Arianna a job? What position could she fill at DiMera Enterprises? Her resume includes waitress/restaurant manager and ex-con pusher and user. She’s Brady’s lay and Rafe’s sister. Since both Brady and Rafe hate EJ, why would Arianna even consider his offer? This is just another typically over-the-top unrealistic plot device that someone being paid big bucks decided was an excellent choice.

"No."

Could this get any more tedious?

Coupled with the Rafe/Sami revolving conversation – no!

J. Edgar Loser kicks the door in and screams...

"FBI!!!"

Cliffhanger Friday – the DOOL writers put Anna and her garish boots on a silver platter to be handed over to Not-so-Smart and the apparently boobilicious Agent 99. The only thing missing is the big red bow. Grrrrrrrr!!

Word verification - fading - my patience with DOOL is fading fast.

Thanks Prevuze! Except for Victor, this episode sounds to me like nap time.

6:09 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

So... I guess Arianna's on break for a while.

And apparently the coffee at the pub is so awful they’d rather go pay $3.00 a cup at the Java Café than get some for free.

"I'm the town pump," says Carly, "I slept with everyone. Except you, even though we were married. I have my standards."

As much as I love Victor’s one-liners, it’s great when he gets out-snarked by someone. LOL

Leslie is so right. Except for any scene with Victor in it (and maybe Nicole, just because she's been gone a while), this is a zap-fest.

And who REALLY thinks that Anna is still going to be in the cabin?

~~~~~~~~~crickets~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's what I should be hearing. It ain't going to be over that quickly. Boots or no boots, the place would be covered with fingerprints, DNA, etc. Anna would have had to burn the place down. Of course, the Rafester doesn't know for sure this is the hideout so he probably won't even look for evidence like that.

Great pictures, great snark, great Prevuze.

6:26 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

And who REALLY thinks that Anna is still going to be in the cabin?

~~~~~~~~~crickets~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's what I should be hearing.

You're absolutely right Applecheeks. Anna will not be behind door #2. After posting my rant, I had a rare moment of clarity. I was being sucked into the DOOL writing abyss. Thank goodness I'm thinking clearly again!

7:30 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Sami rushes back in, "What is this case about? It's about Sydney isn't it?" Rafe, just tell her NO and tell her to get lost.

EJ calls and asks "Aren't you on the plane?" Anna, just tell him YES and tell him to get lost.

Instead of just springing it on you at the hearing, this will give you an opportunity to try to talk me out of it." I'll bet a thousand dollars with poor about-to-bawl Hope watching in the background. Bo, just tell both of them to GET LOST.

LOL over Not-so-Smart and Agent 99 (was he talking into his shoe?) and the Salem PD picture.

Thanks for the almost-Friday recap, Prevuze! :D

Word verification: spermon. Apply your own meaning to that one.

8:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I went back and counted - Sami said she was glad Sydney is back 3 times. Great writing, DOOL! Not only do you recycle storylines, you recycle dialogue within the same day's show!

10:14 AM  
Blogger Klaus said...

"I don't like sleeping under the same roof as EJ."
Then he should have said so when EJ asked and I'm glad Sydney is back.

"What's so important you couldn't talk to me on the phone?"
These people never talk on the phone. It's always; wait until I see you! or We need to talk right away! *click*. Anyway, I'm glad Sydney is back.

"So," says Victor, "How long have you been sleeping with her?"
Oh ho ho! Incest! But at least Sydney is back.

"She was no prude when she married my son.
Well, it's not she was some kind of tramp either. But I'm glad Sydney's back so... whatever.

"But when you're dealing with a baby's life what works is what matters."
Oh! A tiny glimmer of a reasonable
Rafe, and maybe with Sydney back (Thank goodness) he'll stay that way.

Daniel beats himself up for letting Melanie grow up with a pervert who pimped her out,
Um... Trent was also a respected physicist (or something) so... there's that... Boy I am glad Sydney's back!

"You did. You made that choice and it's something you've gotta live with."
Oh no! What a terrible choice you have made Samantha, you have your child back (And I'm glad!!) and she's safe! Regrets!!! OH NOOOOOO!!!!

They don't fit, "Now what am I gonna do."
Just put them in another bag? Where is her common sense!? I'm glad she she doesn't have Sydney anymore and that she's back.

McTavish leaves. Nicole begs no one in particular, "Someone please get me out of here."
Important words: If you can't do the time then don't do the crime. But really, I can't be any more gladder that Sydney is finally back.

12:49 PM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Damn it, Klaus! Just say how you really feel about Sydney being back (I'm glad myself)!

MWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This has been a loooooong afternoon. Thank goodness Sydney's back and I have Bulldog's word verification to ponder.

1:00 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Boy I am glad Sydney's back!

One of the services Prevuze provides is to keep its readers up to date with everything that is going on with DOOL. If we feel you perhaps have missed something, we will always try to be helpful and point it out to you,so, Klaus, I'm not sure you know this, but Sydney is back.

And I for one am very glad about that.

2:01 PM  

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