Monday, February 01, 2010

Beware Of Enterprises That Require New Clothes

EJ sits on the floor at the hideout and plays with Sydney as Anna comes in. EJ is all happy-happy, "Were in the home stretch."

Anna asks, "Why are you so happy? Because Samantha and Rafe have split up?"

"Precisely," says EJ. Anna thinks that's a little cruel. "She brought this on herself," says dastardly EJ, "She gets what she deserves."

Nathan and Stephanie sit at a computer in the Java Café and talk about their getaway to Alpine Valley. Stephanie reminds him she can't go on Valentine's Day.

Gus meets Vivian at the pub. They talk about eliminating Melanie as the audience cheers. "It's going to be on her wedding day," says Vivian, "This will give 'till death do us part' a real punch. But there is something more important: she watched Lawrence die. Now she's going to watch her own daughter die. I just have to get her to that damned wedding. How?"

Carly and Melanie stroll through the hospital and Carly tells her it's not a good idea for her to go to the wedding. Melanie begs and assures her it will be OK. "I'm honored you invited me," says Carly.

"It's not an honor," says Melanie, "I invited lots of people I don't like... Uh... That didn't come out right. I just want to make it up to you for the way I've treated you." Hugs. Bo comes around a corner and watches.

Hope fiddles with the secret box in the Kiriakis Den. She gets it open, takes out a paper and reads, "Damn you Brady! Damn you!" She looks up at Justin, "This is confirmation that my marriage to Bo is officially over."

"I think it was at least on shaky ground," says Justin, "when Bo and Carly hopped into the sack."

Hope reads Lawrence's letter to Justin, "The proof of your sins will be destroyed. There will be blood."

"Sounds like Hemingway," says Justin.

Ernest Hemingway sits at a table in the den drinking scotch and whittling a spear for his next fishing trip. He gets up, walks over to Justin, picks him up by the collar, "Don't you ever mention my name in connection with this show again."

Hope jumps to conclusions, "Carly had a baby and Lawrence wanted it to be destroyed. So she killed him and ran to Bo... the baby's father!"

Carly backpedals and Melanie goes into action begging her to come to the wedding. Carly says she will think about it. "OK," says Melanie, "but I invited you, so you still have to get me something." Melanie leaves.

Bo walks up, "Good work on that 'staying away from Melanie' thing. You didn't know who might be walking up behind you. I could have been Vivian."

"No," says Carly, "She would never be caught dead in bright pink Pradas with six-inch spiked heels."

Vivian gives Gus a shopping list. He realizes the wedding will be recorded and she can watch the bride's demise whenever she wants. Vivian isn't so sure she wants to do that. Victor walks up.

Anna wonders if EJ is being too cruel to Sami. EJ says he isn't sure he's being cruel enough.

Nathan says he forgot about the Valentine's Day thing. She wonders if he just doesn't want to be with her on that day. Nathan brushes it off as he gets called back to the hospital. He leaves Stephanie to make the reservations. Arianna runs up and says she needs to talk about the wedding.

Bo lectures Carly. She tells him Melanie invited her to the wedding. Bo thinks if she goes that will tip Vivian off as to who her daughter is, "Maybe it can be a Mexican wedding. She can use your head as a piñata. This situation is way too volatile. I want you to move back in with me until everything is settled."

Arianna tells Stephanie she can't guarantee being Melanie's maid of honor.

Melanie finds Nathan outside the Java Café. They share an uncomfortable moment and Nathan walks off.

Gus leaves. He compliments Victor's tie on the way out.

Victor sits with Vivian and growls, "If you look up obsequious in the dictionary, you'll find his picture."

"So what does it mean," asks Vivian.

"How should I know," asks Victor, "I only look at the pictures." He accuses Vivian of plotting and tells her she'd better not be plotting against Melanie. She assures him she's not. Victor is skeptical.

Bo sits Carly down, "You are the only person I can just be with these days." Translation: I'm not getting any anywhere else. "You talk about how I take care of you, but that goes both ways. You are part of my life right now."

Carly stammers, "Coming back here I never dreamed... I thought my life was over... not just beginning."

Bo consults the Guy Manual in the chapter entitled, Don't Paint Yourself Into A Corner and quotes verbatim, "I can't promise anything right now. I don't know what will happen to us. Let's move forward and maybe things will get better. What do you say?"

"I... say... yes." Bo moves in and they provide entertainment for all the bored people sitting in the waiting area.

Hope throws a fit. She flails the papers around and says to Justin, "Don't you see? This explains everything. This is history repeating itself — only with Carly not Billie. Or Patrick."

Anna says she thinks Sydney will grow up realizing her father hates her mother. EJ goes to the darkside, "You presume Sydney will know her mother. I hold the cards."

Arianna tells Stephanie about her possible all-expenses-paid whirlwind trip to Statesville, "I'd rather be going to the wedding and not prison."

"That just means you haven't been to enough dreadfully boring weddings," says Stephanie.

Melanie overhears the conversation, "You're going to prison?"

"I don't know," says Arianna, "I think I should back out of the wedding now."

"NO," says Melanie, "If you're in the big house I'll have Stephanie step up to the plate." Melanie's sensitivity is exceeded only by her charm. Arianna gets a call and runs out.

"I can't believe this," says Stephanie, "Our friend may go to prison and we are talking about bridesmaids."

"What was I supposed to say," says Melanie, "Hey, I Hope you like your cellmate... Have you ever seen Shawshank Redemption?"

"I never saw that movie," says Stephanie, "but it was a good book."

"Books," asks Melanie, "People still read?"
She asks why Stephanie can't be is bridesmaid, "Is it Phillip or is it Nathan?"

The doctors stand around the patient in the OR. They all have wrinkled brows as Dr. Nathan Horton, MD and resident klutz performs the delicate procedure. He carefully inserts the scalpel. Blood spews like a fire hydrant gone berserk. Nathan hyperventilates. Dr. Carly Manning, veteran surgeon and accomplished murderess, takes over. Blood continues to spew. An attendant looks up, "It's not that bad. I like a red ceiling better than a white one, anyway."

Hope says she is glad she's not on the job right now, "That was an irrational response. If I were on the job, they'd probably give me a commendation for it."

"Shame on you for not being a robot," says Justin.

Hope reconsiders the conclusions she has previously jumped to, "The secret is Carly had a baby but it's not Bo's. He should have trusted me. Things would have been different."

Justin, ever concerned about Bo and Hope's relationship jumps in to see if he can throw a little gasoline back on the fire, "Maybe. But I have to remind you... you had already moved out."

Vivian asks, "Do you know why we get along?"

Victor growls, "I didn't know that we did."

"We share the same core values," says Vivian, "Family... It tears you up to see Justin with Hope and Bo with Carly."

"Mainly what tears me up," says Victor, "is me sitting here with you. So you're going to off Carly. It couldn't happen to a nicer girl. But nothing happens to Melanie and you keep my name out of it."

"Got it."

Nathan the spaz broods. Dr. Manning gives him the third degree, "You wanna tell me what happened in there."

"You mean you didn't see all the blood," asks Nathan, "I screwed up."

"You weren't concentrating," says Carly, "It was a kidney transplant not a heart transplant."

"Kidneys... hearts... they look so much alike," says Nathan.


Stephanie thinks it would be weird for her to be in Phillip's wedding, "Besides, you know what Thoreau said... 'Beware of enterprises that require new clothes.'"

Henry David Thoreau sits at a table over by a window contemplating the puddles outside on the sidewalk. He walks over to Stephanie and sticks a finger in her face, "First, that's not exactly what I said and second, don't you ever mention my name in connection with this show again."

"Dang," says Stephanie, "I thought you were one of those tree-hugging pacifists."

"I am," says Thoreau, "I wouldn't hurt a fly. But some people just really get under your skin."


Melanie wonders if Stephanie is still hung up on Phillip.

Arianna is in the copshop with Roman. Roman has news, "That agent at the DEA finally got his head out of his..."

"Arianna interrupts, "You have such a way with words."

"Not only are you not going to prison," says Roman, "You are getting a commendation." From the outhouse to the penthouse.

Arianna is stunned, "You did this."

"Your brother and I make a pretty good team," says Roman.

"Thank you," gasps Arianna, "I'm free." She gives him a big hug."

Roman backs her off, "Whoa... I haven't touched a woman in years. I don't want to shock my system."

Hope says she only moved out because she needed time and Ciara needed new scenery.

"By the way," asks Justin, "Where is Ciara?"

"She's upstairs watching videos on her computer," says Hope, "I never knew Barney could be so interesting."


Hope says she feels sorry for Carly having lived with Lawrence and now having Vivian after her. "Not too many women in your shoes would be feeling sorry for Carly," says Justin.

Victor reminds Vivian to stay away from Melanie and leaves. Vivian gets a call. Gus tells her he found everything on the list, but unfortunately had to buy retail. "I have something else I need you to do for me," sneers Vivian.

Roman says, "You get outta here. You don't work here any more. If you ever need anything you holler." As Arianna starts to leave she turns and asks, "You were married to Anna DiMera once, right? Did you know she's back in town?"

EJ smooches everyone and starts to leave. He lectures Anna, "I'm a little concerned about your attitude. You seem to be thinking too much. It's not for you to question me. I'm doing what's best for Sydney. Am I clear?"

"Very."

"Good," chirps EJ, "Enjoy the rest of the day." He leaves.

Anna turns to Sydney, "If you didn't know already, your daddy is a DiMera through and through. God help you."

God sits up in heaven working on creating a few new galaxies. He hands Anna tablets of stone. She reads, "Don't you ever mention my name on this show again."

Hope tells Justin she has to go talk to Bo. She thanks her good friend Justin for all his patience and kindness. Justin is a bit confused. He consults the Guy Manual, "In a word, this process is known as 'schmuckification.'" Hope hugs him. Victor walks into the room and soaks it in.

Bo comes into his house carrying a bag. "We're not married," says Carly, "You don't have to carry me across the threshold."

Bo stands alone in the living room and the baby sitter joins him. Bo hands her a buck, "That's right, isn't it? Twenty five cents an hour plus tip?" The babysitter leaves. Bo contemplates things, "Now I have to explain this to Ciara."

Abe calls. Bo conveniently has to go outside because of bad reception.

Cinema crapité kicks in. We see Bo and Hope's living room through someone's evil eyes. We walk in and stop in front of Carly's Bag.

Arianna tells Roman about picking up EJ's phone by mistake. Roman thinks it's strange Anna wouldn't have called him if she were in town. Arianna asks how there relationship is now that they're not married any more. "We do OK for ex's," says Roman, "I'll give her a call."

"Don't say I snitched," says Arianna, "Hey... I guess I'm still workin' undercover." She leaves. Involuntarily celibate Roman may have some undercover work on his mind, too. He makes a call.

Anna walks through the hideout and looks at her phone as it rings. She sees it's it's Roman and answers, "Ola!"

"Ola backacha," says Roman, "Where are you?"

"Spain."

"Wrong answer."

Stephanie insists she's not hung up on Phillip. Arianna calls Melanie and gives her the good news, "I'm free as a bird!"

"And have a brain to match," says Melanie. She hangs up and tells Stephanie, "I still want you to be a bridesmaid."

Carly asks if Nathan was thinking about Melanie during the blood-spewing incident. Nathan gets defensive, "I said it: I screwed up. Write me up but my personal life is personal."

"Unless you end your patient's personal life," says Carly.

"Are we done now," snorts Nathan. Carly stares.

Hope tells Justin she'd better get going. Justin wishes her luck. Victor walks in and starts up the lecture, "She's my son's wife."

"And to hell how anyone involved actually feels," asks Justin.

"Stay away from Hope," orders Victor.

Justin asks, "Because I'm a threat to Bo and Hope?"

"Because I said so," yells Victor.

"Go tell Bo," says Justin, "He's the one nailing Carly. I'm interested in Hope. She and Bo are history and there is nothing you can do about it."

Gus brings Vivian the bag o' implements. "Melanie will never know what hit her," says Vivian.

Roman challenges Anna on her lie, "What are you doing in Salem?" Anna stares.

Arianna leaves a message for Brady. EJ overhears, "What's the great news?"

Vivian asks Gus if he took care of the other matter. He says it was difficult but he got the job done quicky.

Bo comes back inside and finds Carly's clothes all scattered around and ripped up, "Vivian!" He calls out for Ciara as he runs upstairs.

Gus leaves. Vivian pontificates, "I'm sorry, Victor. There is no other way. Carly's pain has to equal mine. She has to lose Melanie."

Nathan insists he doesn't have issues with Melanie and walks off. Carly sighs, "I tried."

Stephanie wonders why Melanie can't let this go. Melanie says it's because she's never had friends before and wants her to be in the wedding. Stephanie agrees, "Do you ever get what you don't want?"

Melanie just happens to see the Alpine Valley page on Stephanie's computer, "A reservation for two people... who are you going with?"

"A sorority sister from Salem U."

"Maybe you'll meet the man of your dreams there," says Melanie.

"That would be nice," says Stephanie.

Victor tells Justin to stay out of the mix. Justin becomes the drama king and flings his glass into the fireplace, "Go to hell!"

Hope wanders at the pier. She flashes back as Bo tells her the secret has nothing to do with them. She turns to go and bumps into Vivian. Vivian's bag o' goodies drops to the ground. "Oh, Vivian, I'm so sorry," says Hope. They both stare at the bag. Suspense fills the air. Suspense sure has a strange odor, doesn't it?


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17 Comments:

Anonymous Leslie said...

Nathan and Stephanie sit at a computer in the Java Café and talk about their getaway to Alpine Valley.

I hope they’re not talking about Alpine Valley Ski Resort located in mountainous (as if!) southwest Wisconsin.

They talk about eliminating Melanie as the audience cheers.

We couldn’t get that lucky.

“This is history repeating itself — only with Carly not Billie. Or Patrick."

Right on Prevuze. Hope certainly employs selective memory.

EJ goes to the darkside, "You presume Sydney will know her mother. I hold the cards."

This is just silly. EJ and Sami share another child – Johnny. If EJ intends to keep Sydney a secret from Sami, it means that Johnny can never meet his sister. Geez!!! Note to writers – get a clue!

"If you're in the big house I'll have Stephanie step up to the plate." Melanie's sensitivity is exceeded only by her charm.”

Phillip is a top executive in a multi-billion dollar corporation. One can only assume he and Melanie will be wining and dining important clients. Since Melanie has a terminal case of foot in mouth disease, those dinners are sure to be real fiascos.

"Mainly what tears me up," says Victor, "is me sitting here with you.”

It doesn’t tear up the viewers. Vivian and Victor are a stitch!!!

Melanie wonders if Stephanie is still hung up on Phillip.

If she’s wondering about Stephanie and Phillip, why does Melanie want her as a bride’s maid?

"You were married to Anna DiMera once, right? Did you know she's back in town?"

Since she’s an ex-con, I guess Arianna can’t be expected to have much integrity. Keeping secrets for EJ doesn’t appear to be very high on Arianna’s priority list.

Arianna calls Melanie and gives her the good news, "I'm free as a bird!"

"And have a brain to match," says Melanie.

Quite right slick, and they call me Mellow Yellow……

Wow! What a super Monday morning recap – Ernest Hemingway, Henry David Thoreau, God, schmuckification, and an incredible assortment of snarkily captioned photos. My goodness - I would have never guessed that Ciara is familiar with the Kama Sutra! LOL!!!!!!! Have a great one everyone!!!!!

6:03 AM  
Anonymous LemonGrass1985 said...

At least those dinners wouldn't be boring with Melanie hosting like they would be if it were Chloe.

OMG can this soap getting anyworse?

6:43 AM  
Blogger della said...

Prevuze is pretty sweet, but come on i cant stand how the sydney napping is getting dragged on for like ever!

7:39 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

I thought I had my HUH?! moment(s) with the Melanie/Carly exchange. …begging her to come to the wedding. Oh, Puh-leeze! This instant turnaround from sensless hyper-animosity to senseless overdone closeness is so weak.

But then I got to Nathan, an INTERN, performing surgery. OMG!! I'd be leery of a 1st year resident doing surgery, let alone an intern. No wonder their masthead reads, Salem Hospital, You Bring 'Em In, the Undertaker Wheels 'Em Out.

What a line-up of pictures! Prevuze, snarkiest blog on the Internet®! LOL

7:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now who said the internet wasn't educational.They just never said what kind of education.Great job guys.

7:53 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Hope throws a fit. "Don't you see? This explains everything. This is history repeating itself." Exactly. Over and over. So don't you GET it? End it already! Bon Voyage, Adios, See you later alligator. Please help put the viewers and Bo out of our misery and go be with Justin or Patrick or whoever already!

Now since I know Prevuze never exaggerates, I'm picturing the blood-spewing incident to be like Saturday Night Live's parody of Julia Child. It must've been pretty messy in there. I'm with you, Applecheeks, I don't think I'd want a new intern operating on me either. HA

Arianna is free as a bird now. Wait'll she gets back to the pub and, under cover or not, Caroline fires her for pushing drugs out of the pub. And her blabbing immediately the big secret to Pard - she must've taken "how to keep a secret" lessons from Hope, Lucas and Will.

I had tears by the end of the Ciara pictures. Starfish indeed! HAHAHAHAHA Thanks, Prevuze, and everyone try to have a happy Monday if possible.

8:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nathan is a surgeon...ok only on soaps, tomorrow Will will be Roman's superior !!

Ej seems to be written in a corner as the evil one-note villain now, like that he can be the adversary to the hero goodie two shoes one-note good guy Rafe ! Oh joy ! It is what ? John-Stefano new generation ? Puke !
It just a waste of a layered interesting character like Ej and a waste of JS's talent.
Writers you are so not SMART !! so not.

8:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Doesn't it seem odd that they put a tail on Sami before the ransom drop, but not one on E.J. even though he is a Dimera. He can go see the baby and Anna have phone calls to them and the F.B.I. Doesn't have a clue that hes the napper? Just wondering if I was the only one that noticed this.

9:05 AM  
OpenID xamanthe said...

Your screen caps are brilliant! ROTFLMAO!!!!

Thank You!

9:58 AM  
Anonymous sbrLori said...

Too much fun in one blog. Love the Ciara pictures especially the one about Caroline calling Victor...

Bulldog, I too got the SNL Julia Child image (I guess that shows how young we are).

And anonymous, I think Will might be a good boss for ole Pard. Sometimes it seems Will got way too many brain cells to be living in Salem--sometimes he speaks rationally.

Word verification: "imenep". As in "Im enep, I'm a DOOL writer."

Thanks for a great Monday Prevuze. And I know you would never TRY to be funny (you just naturally are).

10:39 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

This is just silly. EJ and Sami share another child – Johnny. If EJ intends to keep Sydney a secret from Sami, it means that Johnny can never meet his sister. Geez!!! Note to writers – get a clue!

But wait! What about the long-lost sister angle? They could drag out the old "Max searches for Melanie" scripts and once again save thousands of trees by recycling that story line.

10:56 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

OMG can this soap getting any worse?

Is that a trick question?

10:57 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Thanks for a great Monday Prevuze. And I know you would never TRY to be funny (you just naturally are).

Hmmm... I think someone's been reading my tweets.

10:59 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

To the previous Anonymous - you are certainly not alone. The lack of actual investigative skills of both the SPD and the FBI throughout this Syd-napping s/l have been noted.

I will admit to being impressed at the one time Rafe DID put a tail on Sami. The tail managed to follow her even though she and EJ left the mansion via the secret tunnels. Now, go explain that one...

11:21 AM  
Blogger I Love Baby Quilts! said...

Last time I was at Alpine Valley, Stevie Ray Vaughn was giving his final performance!

Man I wish Roman would get a new love interest. I'm attracted to him and I'm not sure why!

11:40 AM  
Blogger Klaus said...

Anna walks through the hideout and looks at her phone as it rings.
Wouldn't you have to get a new phone when traveling over seas? I can't imagine one could take their cellphone to Spain and still be reached at the same number.

"Unless you end your patient's personal life," says Carly.
Haha! That's the precise thought I had when I read the line before it.

Justin becomes the drama king and flings his glass into the fireplace, "Go to hell!"
I want to do this at least once, except I don't drink and I'm never near a fire place. Poor me. I will watch, just for that one scene. Also, like all Americans, Victor should take Justin to court for that glass, and emotional distress.

~"A sorority sister from Salem U."
Re: Melanie and Stephanie; I'm not too sure why everyone is lying to everyone else. I know it's a soap, but it just feels... overly counterproductive.

Hope wanders at the pier.
Why is everyone always at the pier! Don't they have anything else to do? And what's a person like Vivian doing trolling the docks.

Caroline fires her for pushing drugs out of the pub.
Haha! And happy belated birthday, Bulldog!

1:07 PM  
Anonymous Cell Phone Diva said...

T-Mobile and Cingular work overseas but if you ever do that, buy a new sim card over there or the charges will be outrageous.

2:12 PM  

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