Thursday, December 24, 2009

Even Snakes Have Mothers

Melanie admires her ring. Phillip admires Melanie's... never mind. They lie in bed as Phillip goes ga-ga, "Last night was the best Christmas present ever. So was the fact that you agreed to marry me."

Daniel and Chloe arrive at the Kiriakis Christmas party. Vivian welcomes them and Daniel introduces Chloe. Vivian introduces herself as Victor's very significant other and admires Chloe's ring, "But, Daniel, the ring doesn't even compare to your fiancée, Va-va-voom! Oh, my, did I say that? Anyway... I Hope you don't hold it against me, but I'm not fond of the name Chloe because of a lousy opera singer who gave Brady an addiction, not to mention a few terrible performances. But, Chloe, I'm sure you're nothing like that little slut."

We have an uncomfortable moment.

Vivian catches on, "Oh, Lord, this can't be the woman who screeched like an owl in Prague!" Vivian apologizes for her gaffe.

Victor steps into the room, "Vivian, don't tell me you put your foot in it again!" Gracious Chloe decides they aren't leaving. Vivian thanks her for her forgiving heart and changes her tune.

We pan up on lonely Stefano standing by the tree in the rumpus room. EJ arrives at his desolate Christmas party and announces Johnny is at his mother's place. Stefano about has a heart attack. EJ says that's just too bad if he doesn't like it, "This won't be his home until you are gone."

Sami and Rafe are back at her place. Sami talks about the vigil and says Roman told her it brought in a lot of leads. Rafe gets a call from the bureau. It's his buddy Tim with potentially big news. Rafe gasps, "What?"

Anna looks at Tony's picture. She tells him she never wanted to cause any pain, "Please tell me I did the right thing last night."

Rafe gets off the phone. Sami effervesces, "So they found Sydney?" Rafe ain' sure. He says the FBI has someone in its sights and things might work out, but they have to wait. Sami bounces and hugs. Translation: Sami's overinflated balloon slowly descends toward the waiting needle.

Nathan and Stephanie fix things up for the childrens' Christmas party at the hospital. Abe and Lexie bring Theo, who runs to the tree, picks up a present and gives it to Stephanie.

Melanie gives Phillip a big box. He opens it and we find sunglasses and other bric-a-brac. He says this will be good for the honeymoon. Stephanie hitches when she hears the dreaded word, "I don't know. I'm a nursing student and I can't just up and leave."

"You'll be Mrs. Phillip Kiriakis," says Phillip, "You won't need a license to empty bed pans." I guess that would make her a 00 #2.

Sami plays with Johnny as Rafe broods waiting for the phone call. Johnny grabs a package under the tree but evil Mommy freaks and tells him they can't open the presents until Sydney comes home. "Oh, great," says Johnny, "I Hope you got us something that will be useful at college."

Stephanie opens the present from Nathan, "WOW! IT'S A... calendar. A 2009 calendar..."

"I know it's not very useful," says Nathan, "but I got it really cheap. Just leaf through it and see what you can find."

Stephanie leafs. "Let's see... January... nothing... nothing... nothing... February... nothing... nothing... nothing... March nothing... nothing... nothing..."

"Uh, you might want to start at the back."

"There is a big red 'X' on December 31," says the ever-observant Stephanie.

"That's right," says Nathan, "It's the last large-item trash pickup of the year and I didn't want to miss it. Oh, and speaking of trash made me think of you. I made a reservation for two at Chez Rouge."

Stephanie asks, "A New Year's Eve date?"

Nathan gives her his Mortimer Snerd smile, "Uh huh."

Melanie doesn't like Phillip badmouthing nurses, "When I'm at the hospital I feel like I'm doing something good."

"You are," says Phillip, "You're doing something good for every single person who isn't at the hospital because that means they don't have to be around you."

"It makes me feel worthy of being Mrs. Phillip Kiriakis," says Melanie.

"You always will be," says Phillip, "No matter how much Internet porn you make."

Vivian frets over her faux pas. Brady tells her to clam up. Vivian offers to help plan the wedding, but Chloe says they don't have a date yet. Things degenerate into more bickering.

I love Christmas at the Kiriakis mansion," says Brady.

Daniel gets up from the couch, "We need drinks. Lots of drinks."

Victor asks if Arianna is coming. Brady is terse, "No."

Victor raises his eyebrows, "Trouble in paradise?"

Arianna arrives at the Safe-house. Sami tells her the FBI might have a lead. Rafe vows, "We're going to get Sydney back."

Stefano explodes, "How dare you say this is no longer Giovanni's home? You know I had nothing to do with Sydney's disappearance. I pity you, letting Giovanni be with that no-good bitch on Christmas."

EJ snorts, "She's his mother!"

"Even snakes have mothers," says Stefano, "Everything was for your sake you heartless ingrate. You still side with the Bradys."

"Samantha lied to me because she was afraid of you," says EJ, "a man who lied to his son."

Stefano backs off and reminds EJ today is Christmas. EJ finds a present from Stefano, "You should have saved your money. He tosses it and walks out."

Stefano growls, "You are a raving fool."

The hospital calls Melanie and tells her she has to come in to work. She apologizes and says they can celebrate when she gets back, "I know we were into the non-Christmas thing, but I think this has turned out to be the best Christmas ever."

Vivian asks Daniel about Carly and thanks him for helping her get back on staff.

Stephanie manages the childrens' gift-fest. Maggie arrives and asks Nathan to read the Christmas story in Tom's honor. Nathan acts like she asked him to press the big red button and blow up the world.

Kate says she has a special present for Stefano. "What is it," asks Stefano.

"Hope."

"She's not my type," says Stefano.

EJ arrives at Sami's party bearing gifts for the kids. Rafe is on the phone and they are all hoping it's good news. Sami comes out and tells EJ about the FBI lead. EJ doesn't share the joy. Rafe gets off the call and EJ gets all over him for not telling him there might have been a break.

Someone knocks at Anna's door, "Who's there?"

"Land Shark."

Brady decides he has to leave. He breaks speed records getting out. And then there were four. Vivian asks Chloe for some help. They go off and Victor tells Daniel asks, "What's up with Brady?"

Victor growls, "He just can't stand to be around happy well-adjusted people."

"But why did he leave here," asks Daniel. Vic rants about Arianna the drug dealer. Phillip walks and announces he has an announcement. To announce.

The kids at the hospital are in present-overload. Nathan declines Maggie's offer to fill in for Tom, "I can't fill his shoes. I don't even want to try."

"But," protests Maggie, "I put odor eaters in them." Stephanie encourages him to suck it up and read the story. Magnanimous Nathan finally agrees.

Rafe says there was nothing to tell. He and EJ bicker. The girls try to back them off. EJ settles down and decides he overreacted. He apologizes. "No prob," says the macho F-man.*

*An F-man is a guy who didn't quite make it to G man.

Anna finds a box at the door, "Oh, it came. Wonderful. I knew Sydney would love it."

Vivian and Chloe return. Phillip announces he and Melanie are engaged.

That revs Victor's engines, "Is the trip you booked that you were going to take after you married the Johnson girl still valid? Maybe you can use the same day. I was wondering, have you and Melanie ever been on a date that wasn't broadcast over the Internet?"

"Give it a rest," says Daniel.

Chloe walks up to Phillip and offers support and congrats. Daniel offers a hug. A guy hug. Victor slugs down more booze.

Stef'n-Ho have arrived at the Kiriakis mansion. She says Phillip asked her to meet him there. She hopes he will invite her back into his life, "If he does, that should give you Hope about EJ." They make their grand entrance and Daniel and Chloe leave immediately.

Stefano gushes about Vivian. She returns the compliments, "You haven't lost that counterfeit smile and smarminess oozing from every pore."

Phillip tells Kate about the engagement. Jingle barf.

Arianna arrives back at her apartment and flops onto the bed. Suddenly she sees a present. She gets up to get it as Brady arrives, "Merry Christmas." Arianna forgets her gift and Brady gets his.

Sami brings Johnny out to greet EJ.

Kate is stunned. Vivian gushes, "I wish you a long and happy marriage, my darling son." Kate has a cow.

Mayor Abe does magic tricks. He makes a quarter appear out of nowhere. Then he takes a city budget spreadsheet out of his pocket and makes the red ink turn black. Melanie arrives as Nathan begins reading the Christmas story.

Rafe staggers out and tells everyone the lead didn't pan out. Oh, the despair!

Anna sings away in a manger. Sydney wishes she could get away to a manger, or anywhere, for that matter.

The dreadful Kiriakis party continues. Stefano asks Kate to say few words. Kate congratulates Phillip and wishes him happiness. She toasts, "To Phillip... in yet another phase in his life."

"Bottoms up," says Stefano. He tells Kate she should never forget this moment.

Arianna and Brady continue their Bliss-mas.

Nathan reads... and we fade back to Tom reading... and back to Nathan... Maggie starts up a little Silent Night... Melanie bawls.

Rafe and Sami cuddle. "We lost the battle but we'll win the war," says Rafe, "We will find her."

"I just wish Nicole could remember the voice," whines Sami, "There has been no contact. We don't know who has her or why."

Anna rocks and looks at Sydney in her playpen, "Any minute now, Sydney and our little errand from last night will work it's magic."

EJ arrives home. He finds an envelope and opens it.

THE NOTE!

EJ reads, "I have your daughter... instructions to follow... tell no one... I am watching you. And, by the way, merry Christmas."

EJ gasps.

NOTE – you can now follow Prevuze on twitter at: http://twitter.com/prevuze

Prevuze II has a video of the daily show previews, which should be available by noon (EST) on any given day. To see Prevuze II: CLICK HERE


20 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting prevuze!

Now is it just me or does it seem that note has been around a long time & just now finally made it to EJ?

5:39 AM  
Anonymous Lori said...

All I want for Christmas is the ability to be as snarky as Vivian and Prevuze.

But I'm still trying to figure out WHAT exactly Phillip was admiring on Melanie. She is built like a teenage girl. Oh wait....

7:17 AM  
Anonymous Betyar said...

"Jingle barf" just about summs up this eppisode for me. I hate to be such a grinch, being Christmas eve and all, but other than Vic & Viv's snarky remarks this eppi sucks.

I hope we all have a much better Christmas than the Kiriakises, DiMeras, and Bradys combined!

Az Prevuze put it, Merry Bliss-mas everyone!

7:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's so sad we're still judging a woman's attractiveness by a cup size. :(

Can't wait to use the old FF'd button.

I want new batteries for the remote for Christmas!

7:46 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

What a cheery Christmas celebration that is at the Kiriakis mansion. But much more entertaining than the syrupy HortonBradyfest we usually see. Vivian's comments were golden. They were like unexpected unitalicized Prevuisms.

I also like Vic pointing out how soon it's been since Phillip was madly in love with and wanting to marry Steponme. Good one!

EJ finds a present from Stefano, "You should have saved your money. He tosses it and walks out." Stefano growls, "You are a raving fool." Yeah! It's probably expensive. Take it back and get the cash.

Great censored link! And I LOL at the memory of "Land Shark." and Rafe the F-Man. HAHAHA

It's Christmas Eve and I don't have to go anywhere so I could just enjoy Prevuze today. Thanks and Merry Christmas everyone! :D

7:49 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Johnny grabs a package under the tree but evil Mommy freaks and tells him they can't open the presents until Sydney comes home. "Oh, great," says Johnny, "I Hope you got us something that will be useful at college."

Anna kidnapped Sydney from Nicole, and now Sami is kidnapping Christmas from the rest of her brood. That seems fair - not! Perhaps EJ should think twice about leaving Johnny with nitwit Sami and her bad a@@ ex-FBI doofus of a boyfriend. Sigh.

Nathan gives her his Mortimer Snerd smile, "Uh huh."

I knew that look was familiar. LOL!!!!!!!!!

"It makes me feel worthy of being Mrs. Phillip Kiriakis," says Melanie.

"You always will be," says Phillip, "No matter how much Internet porn you make."

Phillip was married to Belle so the bar has been set pretty low.

Kate says she has a special present for Stefano. "What is it," asks Stefano.

"Hope."

"She's not my type," says Stefano.

Excellent Prevue - most excellent!!!

"No prob," says the macho F-man.*

*An F-man is a guy who didn't quite make it to G man.

Thank you for the definition Prevuze. Something completely different crossed my mind.

Phillip tells Kate about the engagement. Jingle barf.

If her son was engaged to Melanie, what mother wouldn’t be throwing up in her mouth?

EJ arrives home. He finds an envelope and opens it.

THE NOTE!

Does UPS deliver on Christmas Day?

This Christmas I am giving special thanks for Victor. Once again, he’s ridden in on his white horse and saved this episode of Daze! Why are EJ and Stef’n-Ho still living under the same roof? I understand that the DOOL budget is tight but couldn’t TPTB rob their kids’ piggy banks to get the money to build a new set?

Loved the Christmas Eve censored link and Roman’s present to himself. Maybe Roman and the doll can get an Internet porn gig like Philanie!

7:57 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

But I'm still trying to figure out WHAT exactly Phillip was admiring on Melanie.

Perhaps I took some poetic license.

8:41 AM  
Anonymous WingNut '75 said...

Since I didn't get around to posting this until late last night, I thought I'd re-post it today for all to enjoy. Someone yesterday posted that Alice got run over by a reindeer and that got my creative juices flowing, resulting in:

Alice got run over by a reindeer
(sung to the tune of Grandma got run over by a reindeer)

(Chorus:)
Alice got run over by a reindeer,
Walkin' home from the pub on Christmas eve.
Now you might say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for all of Salem, they believe.

She had eaten too much chowdah...
Maggie begged her not to go.
But she was in a big old hurry,
Just tryin' to get away from Stef-n-Ho.

Roman found her Christmas mornin',
And the cops were really lame.
There were hoof prints on her forehead...
Still the SPD is clueless who to blame.

(Repeat Chorus)

Now we're all so pround of Mickey,
He's been takin' this so well.
He gave up his legal practice,
And left town to sail the world with Shawn and Belle.

It's not Christmas without Alice
To referee around the tree.
Sami's ball was placed by EJ's,
Now the EJami's in the crowd are yelling "SCREEEEEEE"!

(Repeat Chorus)

Now there's donuts on the table,
Don't touch the fruit dish brought by Kate,
'Cause we sure don't want the writers,
To recycle the storyline of "Apple-gate".

We've warned all of Salem Commons,
Better watch out for yourselves.
They should never give a license
To Chelsea Brady or a man who plays with elves.

(Repeat Chorus)

Maybe this can spark another round of creativity and result in more Prevuze DROOL carols...

8:55 AM  
Anonymous Lori said...

WingNut, I'm glad you cleared up the mystery of what happened to Mickey. I thought he'd met the same fate as Tommy Horton or Don Craig.

9:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There were hoof prints on her forehead...
Still the SPD is clueless who to blame.


So true, so true.

9:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who needs Christmas presents when we have Prevuze & Vivian & WingNut & Bulldog to keep us laughing! Now if I can only get that f-song out of my head.

*An F-man is a guy who didn't quite make it to G man.

Does that mean when Rafe wants to see Sami in something sexy he has her wear an F-string?

9:58 AM  
Anonymous Lori said...

Anonymous, we also have you to keep us laughing. Sami in her "F string" ROFLMAO

10:16 AM  
Anonymous Berg said...

Three cheers to wingnut!!

"I Hope you don't hold it against me, but I'm not fond of the name Chloe because of a lousy opera singer who gave Brady an addiction, not to mention a few terrible performances. But, Chloe, I'm sure you're nothing like that little slut."

Oh it is so great having Vivienne and Victor together. If it weren't for them- I would be forced to watch more recycled storylines.

F-Man - oh Prevuze you out did yourself with today's episode. So snarky and true.

Landshark! What a great insert of SNL fun.

Jingle Barf - that about sums up this episode of DOOL for me.

Happy holidays to all and a jingle barf good night.

10:19 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Prevuze - You're all wise and knowing. Our local weather wonk butted in during the tearjearking hang-the-Horton-ornaments scene. What does this mean?

12:26 PM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

Oh yeah - it was to tell us it's raining.

12:27 PM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

I packed, traveled, unpacked, suffered through today's DOOL episode and now my reward...a fabulous Prevuze, hilarious pictures (especially Roman's present), and great Christmas carols (Wingnut, you rock!).

Vivian catches on, "Oh, Lord, this can't be the woman who screeched like an owl in Prague!"

If I didn't love Vivian before, she'd win my heart for sure with her "welcome" for Chloe. LOLOL

HUH?! Moment #1:

The hospital calls Melanie and tells her she has to come in to work.

Isn't she off? What would she have done if she & Philip were off on the island Christmas trip they originally planned??

"Hope." "She's not my type," says Stefano.

LMAO, but that isn't what he said when she was Princess Gina!

HUH?! Moment #2:
Nathan declines Maggie's offer to fill in for Tom.

Tom has been gone for years for pete's sake. We've had half a dozen folks "filling in" for him. It's not like he's going to show up some day to take back the threadbare Santa suit. [Of course, this is DAZE, so who knows.]

Mayor Abe does magic tricks...he takes a city budget spreadsheet out of his pocket and makes the red ink turn black.

DOOL can be unrealistic at times, but THIS! It's way beyond the realm of possibilities in this day & age. I speak from bitter experience. HAHAHA

Word verification: pignewnf
Some play on the word fig-newton? A pig-newton? Nah, I got nothin'. It's just a really funny word. LOL

This was a great Christmas Eve treat, thanks!

1:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ok why is it no one figured out that dean took ciara to get back at hope?? he said as much in front of her and bo. he had no intention of giving her back, ever. at least not alive. had they gone with hopes gut ciara would be dead right now. how can she say she never loved anyone but bo? what about patrick? god i hate hope. used to like her but now i wish chelsea was still driving around salem so she run her over and give us and bo some much needed peace

1:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yet something else the 'wonderful writers' could have used, but of course did not...

Hope's b-day: December 24, 1974 Hope Brady in real time, 1964 according to the memorial Stone

Imagine today's scene outside their house, and add the impact of her b-day to it.

3:40 PM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

Prevuze - You're all wise and knowing. Our local weather wonk butted in during the tearjearking hang-the-Horton-ornaments scene. What does this mean?

Oh yeah - it was to tell us it's raining.


It means it was raining.

Unless your weather wonk is like my weather wonk in which case he wouldn't know rain from an Animal House style food fight.

5:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have not been able to see DOOL for a month due to family emergency commitments. I think I now prefer your reviews to the actual show -- even though I personally know one of the actors and sometimes get information ahead of time.

12:27 PM  

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