Friday, June 08, 2007

Disastrous DiMera Attack

A long black limousine pulls up in front of the Prevuze compound. The driver, looking strangely like Dr. Rolf steps out and opens the rear door. Bart gets out and walks up to the Prevuze guardhouse, "Pizza delivery for Prevuze."

"Since when do they deliver pizzas in limousines, and at 2AM," asks the Prevuze guard.

"It's just temporary," says Bart, "Our rusted 1986 Ford panel truck broke down. We made the mistake of taking it to Max Brady's garage to be fixed and it could be weeks before we get it back. And, hey, it's a lot of work to get Prevuze out, so I guess they're hungry in there no matter what time it is."

Meanwhile, with the guard distracted, a figure dressed in black slips out the door on the opposite side of the limo and slithers into the forest primeval surrounding the compound.

"Whad'ya think I'm stupid asks the Prevuze guard?" The figure crawls ever-closer to Prevuze central. The guard continues, "Nobody in their right mind takes a vehicle to Max Brady for repair."

The guerilla reaches his goal. He sees a metal box on the grounds and reads the lettering on it, "SECRET LINK BETWEEN PREVUZE AND DOOL." A big red arrow points to a cable. Another sign reads, "CUT HERE TO WREAK HAVOC."

The figure takes out his Special Edition Salem Serial Killer Toadsticker and slices the cable. Pan in on Tony DiMera holding the line he has just cut, "Take that, Prevuze readers! Oh, how I love ruining lives! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"


* * *

Dear Prevuze Reader:

We have been the victims of a disastrous DiMera attack. Rest assured, we are doing everything we can to remedy the situation as fast as possible, which means we have not notified the Salem PD. Our crack Prevuze disaster recovery team is hard at work, and we anticipate having Prevuze posted by 10 – 11AM EDT today. You have our sincere apologies for any inconvenience.

The Prevuze Team

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those damn DiMera - they ruin everything they touch.

EJ is going to have to be sacrificed for this. Call Celeste. It's BBQ time.

4:58 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

SHANE!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN WE NEED YOU!! SHAAAAAAAANEEEEEE!!!!!
Oh yeah, you became a Broadway producer and married your nanny, Damn!

6:49 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Dear Prevuze Team,

Sorry to hear about the attack. So glad you didn't call the Salem PD, we may never hear from you again!

6:54 AM  
Anonymous MomofDNA said...

Nah, Shane's a goldfish now....My kids watch him everyday on "Stanley"....

He's still smarter than the Salem PD, of course...

7:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Breath in.....Breath out.....Breath in.....Breath out

7:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

its okay you guys still rock

9:00 AM  
Anonymous Theresa said...

You know you could always call Salem University Hospital and have them all infected with TB.

just sayin....

10:46 AM  
Anonymous KOTU said...

I was "on the road" and counting on a Prevuze fix to get me through missed airline connections and endless traffic delays. AAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKK!

7:59 PM  

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