Friday, February 05, 2010

The Last Of The Luddites

EJ is with Anna at the hideout. We go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday. EJ says he's kicking Anna to the curb and also tells her he makes the decisions. Anna retaliates, "That's where you are wrong, EJ. DEAD wrong." Anna goes on to threaten EJ with everything but his own personal nuclear event.

"Are you threatening me," asks EJ. It must be a burden to be that perceptive.

Vivian is on the phone leaving wedding day instructions, presumably with Gus, "When Melanie opens the gift it will take her breath away." We flash forward to the gift opening. Carly rushes in as Vivian announces the tiara has a poison tip. Melanie gasps for air and hits the deck squealing and huffing along with Carly. An air of sadness creeps in as the viewers realize things probably won't really happen this way.

Back to reality. Vivian says, "That's what would happen in the perfect world..." Victor interrupts and Vivian acts like she was talking to a caterer. Victor wonders what she's up to.

Nathan bumps into Melanie outside the pub. We go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday. Nathan the sot breaks into song, "Here comes the bride all dressed in... maroon." He tells her he doesn't want her marrying Phillip.

Kate sits with Carly at the hospital and tells her she's on to something, "We can help each other but only if you are honest. I want the truth."

Rafe is with Sami in her living room. We go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday. Man, and I thought groundhog day was earlier this week. Maybe the show is on an even lower budget. Or, face it, maybe this is the way it always has been. "I love you and nothing will ever change that," says Rafe. He starts to leave that.

Sami blocks him, "I love you, too." She kisses him. He moves her to the couch. Yep. The old block, kiss and couch maneuver. They attack each other like hormone-crazed teens. Suddenly, Sami the tease makes an appearance, "Wait! I can't do this!" Rafe hopes he's hearing things. "It's wrong," says Sami. Gee, Rafe doesn't think it's wrong.

Victor says he knows Vivian was on the phone with Gus. Vivian claims not to know anyone named Gus. Victor reminds her he has surveillance tapes.

Vivian changes her tune, "He's my lover... My boy-toy, if you will."

"I won't," growls Victor.

"OK," sighs Vivian, "I'll tell you everything."

Kate refuses to lay all her cards out on the table when Carly questions her, "This is not a game says Carly. Tell me what you know." There's a real epidemic of not-minding-your-own-business-it is in Salem these days.

Nathan stammers and slurs. He hugs Melanie as Stephanie walks up. We share an uncomfortable moment. A very uncomfortable moment. Nathan doesn't really seem to care, however.

Vivian comes clean, "You have hundreds of minions. Why can't I have one?" She insists Gus is capable and Victor's involvement won't be exposed.

"It had better not be," snorts Victor, "since I'm not involved."

"Your psychotic ex-wife is in my way," whines Vivian.

"WHICH one?" Good one, Victor.

"Kate."

Carly tells Kate she thinks she's bluffing.

EJ turns into the incredible hulk. One of his fans in the audience leans over and whispers to her neighbor, "I prefer to think of him as the incredible hunk."

Anna cowers as EJ lets her have it. She backs off on the threats and says she meant EJ would regret it on an emotional level. EJ claims she's nothing but an overpaid nanny... who failed. Anna says she forgot Rafe is with the FBI. She lectures EJ for ripping Sydney away from her mother and says her attachment is now with Auntie Anna.

Sami and Rafe have the "should or shouldn't we do it" discussion. Here's a shock: Rafe thinks they "should" while Sami thinks they "shouldn't." Vegas odds are about 10,000 to 1 that "should" will win.

Stephanie suggests Nathan should go home. The girls won't let him drive, though. Melanie offers to walk him home. Stephanie helps. The three of them stumble off together.

Vivian tells Victor about Kate stealing the present. Victor can't figure what Kate would want to do that for. "You know," says Vivian, "I've grown very fond of Melanie."

"Only since you've been ordered not to kill her!"

"I think we will get closer," says Vivian.

Kate gives up and says there is probably no connection between Carly and the girls. She starts to leave. Carly stops her, "All right. I'll tell you everything I know, but you have to tell me everything you know." Odds are, this will be a short conversation.

Rafe has worked Sami over to the couch for a conversation. Sami rambles about what they could have had. Rafe thinks about what he wants to have. He works every angle, "We haven't lost Sydney. She's out there somewhere but we're going to find her. I promise you that."

"You never lost me, either," says Rafe, "I'm still here."

"I know," says Sami, "I can tell from all the whimpering and begging."

Anna bounces Sydney and talks about how much Sydney must love her. EJ claims Anna's replicable, "You have been reckless."

That does it. Anna scoops up Sydney and starts to go, but EJ blocks the door. Anna says, "I'm handing her over to Bennie and you can see how she reacts to having someone else she loves ripped away from her. Do you want to screw her up more than you have?"

"She wouldn't fit into Salem society if she weren't screwed up," says EJ.

Rafe opens the Guy Manual to the chapter, "When you are desperate." He speed reads and gives it all he's got.

The girls bring Nathan into Maggie's kitchen and he stumbles all over Mia. Melanie's purse goes flying and they pick things up together, with longing stares. We discover Melanie's phone did not survive the crash. They also discover Nathan left his keys at the pub. Melanie goes on the mission to get them.

Carly tells Kate she and Melanie got off to a rocky start and have gotten closer. She claims the relationship is only professional. She also says Vivian doesn't need a reason to be delusional. Kate brings up the argument over the gift, "I overheard Vivian talking to some guy. They were also talking about you and Melanie. Vivian seems to have you uptight. You more than most know what she is capable of. Watch your back." Kate starts to go.

Carly stops her, "I thought you said I could help you."

"You will at some point," says Kate. She leaves.

Carly turns and zones out, "What does Vivian know?"

Melanie arrives at the pub and finds Nathan's keys. Lucas pops in.

"Shouldn't you be at Phillip's bachelor party," asks Melanie.

"No," says Lucas, "The guys always have more fun when I'm not there." He says he's there to get food for Will and Allie, "There is nothing Allie likes better than a steaming bowl of chowdah and a couple brews." She tells him about the key's and Lucas says he thinks Nathan hasn't been himself lately, "Neither has Will, come to think of it."

Nathan rejects more coffee. That's Stephanie's cue to go make more. Mia leaves as Nathan mumbles, "God, Melanie, why did you have to be there right then?" Stephanie wants to know what that's all about.

Carly comes into the Kiriakis den and tells Vivian she's looking for Bo.

"You're looking for Bo here," asks Vivian, "How the hell did you make it through medical school? " Vivian suggests she try calling him.

Carly sees the wedding paraphernalia and flashes back to her nuptials with Victor, "Nothing good can come out of a wedding here." Then she sees the deadly gift, "Is that the gift you and Kate argued over? Kate told me all about it." Carly moves toward the box, but Vivian tells her to leave it alone.

Kate finds Victor at the Java Café, "THERE you are. I was just thinking about texting you."

Victor shows his disdain, "I neither send nor receive texts."

"Ah yes," says Kate, "You're the last of the Luddites. I'm concerned about Vivian. She went insane over a wedding gift. She's gone completely around the bend."

Victor chuckles, "Funny... she just said the same thing about you."

Lucas says Nathan doesn't confide in him so he's not sure what's up with him. "So what do you think it is," asks Melanie.

Lucas asks, "And you care because? I think he's heartsick. He's all mopey. Sounds like girl trouble to me." Melanie figures she'd better be getting back to Maggie's house. Lucas sucker-punches her and leaves.

Anna tells EJ Sydney is even saying her name now, "She kind of pronounces it, 'Mamma-Anna.'" EJ backs off and says maybe Anna has a point. "I'm proud of you for putting your daughter first," says Anna.

"I always do," says EJ, "I'm a very compassionate kidnapper. The longer this goes on the less time is on our side. I may not find the right time to take her away."

"I think leaving Sami is the last thing you want," says Anna.

I don't know about EJ, but leaving her is the last thing Rafe wants at the moment. He pulls out all the stops. They reminisce about the laughing penguins. Rafe says, "I know Sydney isn't mine..."

"She is yours," says Sami, "You brought her back to me."

"And I won't rest until I get her back again," says the G-Man. Rafe noticed she was responding to the laughing penguin angle, so he goes back there. That does the trick. Sami goes down faster than your typical Salem gal in an express elevator.

We instantly transport to the bedroom where we are showered with scenes of body parts flailing and clothes ripping.

Stephanie asks, "What did you say to Melanie?"

"I didn't," says Nathan, "I should have told her not to feel sorry for me."

"Why would she feel sorry for you?"

"I don't know."

Melanie interrupts this pointless drivel as she arrives with the keys. Stephanie volunteers to drive Nathan home. Melanie offers to go with them, but Stephanie declines.

"How will you get home," asks Melanie.

"We'll figure something out," says Stephanie, "

Nathan turns to Melanie, "You were going to tell me something."

"It's not important," says Melanie. Stephanie and Nathan stagger off together. Inside, Melanie stares.

Victor chides Kate, "You stole Vivian's gift to Melanie and tried to pass it off as your own."

Kate fights back, "Obviously Vivian has you whipped."

"You didn't say that."

"Yes I did," says Kate, "You know how dangerous Vivian is. I'm worried about our son."

"You married the man who tried to kill your son and you say that," asks Victor, "You keep making trouble and I'll make sure Phillip knows it and you are barred from the wedding. Is that what you want?"

Vivian keeps Carly away from the box. "You'd think there were venomous snakes in there," says Carly.

"Yes," says Vivian, "See... air holes." Vivian asks about her relationship with Melanie. She wonders if she takes such an avid interest in all the nursing students and brings up Carly's alienation from Nicholas, Please go away. I am trying to plan a wedding." Carly leaves.

Carly stops in the foyer, "She knows. I have to find Melanie." She runs out.

EJ chuckles at Anna's remark about Sami. Anna says, "We all know Sami still floats your boat."

"She ripped my heart out and tore it to shreds," says EJ.

"Look at yourself," says Anna. You're the loneliest guy on earth. Kind of like the Maytag Repairman of bumbling criminals. Your life sucks. Admit it."

"I'm not lonely," insists EJ, "I have two children and the satisfaction of knowing Samantha is suffering for what she did."

Speaking of satisfaction, Rafe and Sami bask in the afterglow. "You're stuck with me," says Rafe.

Nathan and Stephanie are at the Java Café. Nathan says he wasn't ready to go home yet, "I just can't wait for this wedding to be over with."

Melanie comes in to see Vivian, "I need to talk to Phillip." Vivian says he's not there and pulls her over for a chat.

"I can't marry him," wails Melanie.

Mia comes back into Maggie's kitchen as Carly knocks, "I need to talk to Melanie." Mia tells her she's gone. Carly gets desperate and grills Mia about Melanie's whereabouts. Mia dunno.

Melanie continues to insist she can't marry Phillip. "If I can't talk you back into marrying Phillip," says Vivian, "we'll just have to go to Plan B. She stares at the lethal package.

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15 Comments:

Anonymous Berg said...

I dunno about EJ making Sami suffer but Sami is for sure making the rest of us suffer. Definately a must miss episode. I think I am a little sick to my stomach.

5:09 AM  
Anonymous Saggy Baskets said...

Uhh, no Sami, Sydney isn't Rafe's by any stretch of the imagination or technical meaning of the word.

The writers are really destroying Sami. She just sucks now.

5:44 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Vivian claims not to know anyone named Gus. Victor reminds her he has surveillance tapes.

Victor also met Gus at the Java Café. He defined him by using the “do you have a better vocabulary than a DOOL writer” word of the day - obsequious.

"Your psychotic ex-wife is in my way," whines Vivian.

"WHICH one?" Good one, Victor.

Once again, Victor is the reason to set my DVR to record DOOL.

EJ turns into the incredible hulk. One of his fans in the audience leans over and whispers to her neighbor, "I prefer to think of him as the incredible hunk."

OK – that’s the other reason to set my DVR to record DOOL.

“Do you want to screw her up more than you have?"

"She wouldn't fit into Salem society if she weren't screwed up," says EJ.

So true, so true!!

The girls bring Nathan into Maggie's kitchen and he stumbles all over Mia.

Why Maggie’s kitchen? Doesn’t Nathan live with Lucas? It’s too bad that Lucas is Salem's resident – for now – persona non grata. Since Lucas has so much first person experience, he should be able to deal with a drunk.

Melanie arrives at the pub and finds Nathan's keys. Lucas pops in.

OMG – I typed too soon! Lucas is making a special guest appearance!!!!!

Vivian suggests she try calling him.

Delusional? Hardly – Vivian just had a remarkably coherent thought. All the Salemites tote around cell phones that seem to ring during important conversations but those same cell phones are never used to track down someone. I can’t remember the last time I just popped up on someone’s doorstep. I call first.

We instantly transport to the bedroom where we are showered with scenes of body parts flailing and clothes ripping.

This just proves that Sami is the quintessential easy lay. ZAPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"You married the man who tried to kill your son and you say that," asks Victor.

Kate also married the man whose son she tried to kill so turnabout is fair play.

This episode sounds like typical Daze craziness. Sigh! TGIF and TGFP!!!!!! Have a great weekend everyone!

5:58 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Leslie, I had the same reaction to the girls dragging Nathan to Maggie's kitchen. Of course, we know why they took him there - they don't have a set of Lucas/Nathan's apartment.

Anna goes on to threaten EJ... "Are you threatening me," asks EJ. It must be a burden to be that perceptive.

It's a gift, Prevuze.

Man, and I thought groundhog day was earlier this week.

Prevuze took the words right out of my mouth. THREE scene repeats and a flashback fantasy. Lazy, lazy, cheap, and lazy.

Watching today's episode should take about 10 minutes - some Victor/Vivian, some flailing naked parts, a little EJ, a glipse of Lucas and I'm done.

Thanks for watching all the rest of it for me, Prevuze. 50 minutes of my life I can spend doing something more exciting - like watching paint dry.

6:37 AM  
Blogger Klaus said...

e go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday.
It's so we don't forget, Prevuze.

Nathan bumps into Melanie outside the pub. We go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday.
Really Prevuze, it's so we don't forget.

He tells her he doesn't want her marrying Phillip.
Don't let your girlfriend hear you saying that.

Rafe is with Sami in her living room. We go through the exact... exact same scene we left them with yesterday.
And now we will never forget.

EJ turns into the incredible hulk.
Anna went face to face with Stefano and cowers from Ej? :|

EJ claims Anna's replicable, "You have been reckless."
Because it was Anna who left her 'secret plot' phone on a table in hall.

We discover Melanie's phone did not survive the crash.
Cheap phone.

Melanie arrives at the pub and finds Nathan's keys. Lucas pops in.
Lucas! And here I thought he left the country for some reason.

"Neither has Will, come to think of it."
What does that have to with Nathan? Or I am just impolite?

Victor shows his disdain, "I neither send nor receive texts."
Haha!

"I'm not lonely," insists EJ, "I have two children and the satisfaction of knowing Samantha is suffering for what she did."
Sounds bitter and lonely to me.

6:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I'm not lonely," insists EJ, "I have two children and the satisfaction of knowing Samantha is suffering for what she did."

Now I know EJ will be hooking up with Arianna for sure. (Gag!) Being alone is apparently the worst fate possible in Salem. Pathetic.

Saggy Baskets: The writers are really destroying Sami. She just sucks now.
Yes and YES.

7:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why why the writers do that to Sami ?
She was such a dynamic, sassy character..sigh
She was popular because of her appealing flaws now she is worse than her goodie two shoes sisters (at least they had jobs).
She is becoming more and more disliked, don't understand the writers goal here. Do you ?

7:48 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

I'm sorry, but I thought Lucas was gone by now. I guess this time he's around to at least explain where Will and Allie are while Safe cavort on the couch.

Carly moves toward the box, but Vivian tells her to leave it alone. Uh, Viv, since everyone wants to take a peek at it why don't you put it away? OH WAITAMINUTE!!!!!! Better idea: since Hope wants to snoop and open stuff that's not hers leave it out. Maybe she'll open it and try it on.

Jack Bauer decoder ring. HAHAHAHA Everyone should have one of those. How often I'm watching some other show and say "If they'd just get Jack in there the problem would be solved by now!"

LOL over "Shouldn't you be at Phillip's bachelor party," asks Melanie. "No," says Lucas, "The guys always have more fun without me."

I'm going to say the exact...exact thing I've said before -- thanks for the great Prevuze. And happy weekend everyone! :D

7:48 AM  
Anonymous chaya said...

I don't know about EJ, but leaving her is the last thing Rafe wants at the moment. He pulls out all the stops

I didn't know that's what they are calling it these days - probably should have called them the "go's" instead.

8:16 AM  
Blogger msutton8 said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

3:56 PM  
Blogger msutton8 said...

The reason Sami aka Alison sucks on the show is b/c
she is so busy doing commercials and the Biggest loser

3:59 PM  
Anonymous Saggy Baskets said...

mutton the reason Sami sucks now is because the writers have her confused with goody two shoes Carrie not because she's on the Biggest Loser right now.

Fans loved or hated Sami because she wasn't the good girl, she was the bad girl who was always scheming. Now she's as boring as Carrie and Rafe is still as boring as Austin and about GG is just as talented as Austin Peck.

4:55 AM  
Anonymous Saggy Baskets said...

msutton, the reason Sami is boring has nothing to do with TBL. Fans loved or hated Sami because she was the vixen, the schemer.
The writers have turned her into a lesser version of Carrie which is appropriate I guess because Rafe is basically Austin.

At least the producers have an actor playing him who is just as talented as Austin Peck with Galen Gering.

Board meet Board.

4:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This just sucks! I don't think I can watch it anymore, I just can't!

Sami and Rafe make me gag, Rafe by himself makes me gag and EJ and Ariana make me want to hurl.

I thought someone was trying to save this show. If I'm drowning don't let these writers try and save me, I'll probably get hit by lightning, hit my head and get bit by a shark before I drown.

I fast forward through most of the show now and even through some of Prevuze because I can't stand the writing any longer.

Tell me, if your daughter was missing would you be in the mood for sex? I would need to be drugged just to survive.

I agree they have killed Sami's character and replaced her with Carrie. It's so sad, they didn't even have a funeral, not that Marlena, John, Eric, Carrie or Bell would have shown up.

Please let the powers that be hear our prayers, complaints and rants and make this a better, more complex and facinating show again!

10:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I noticed on this episode that Sami is wearing a large diamond wedding ring, I guess Alison forgot to take her's off? It was on her left hand, while she does have one on her right hand also. One of those tidbits the show forgets about or thinks we won't...

10:46 AM  

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