Tuesday, July 14, 2009

I'm A Sucker For Beautiful Girls With Big...

Sami sits on her couch and talks to Allie on the phone. Allie leans over the railing on the 46th floor of the new Kiriakis Building construction site and plays with the construction workers' power tools as she talks on the phone. Sami tells Allie what a great time they will have with Johnny later that day. Allie tells her she's not sure she can make it, since she has to take the bar exam. Sami hangs up as Rafe joins her, "What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

You're good at it."

SMACK!

"It will be good all of us to be together," says Sami. She looks over at a picture of Grace and falls apart, "Well almost all of us."

EJ plays with Johnny. Will arrives and thanks EJ for dropping the suit, "I just have one question, why?"

Kate tells Phillip Stephanie is having a flash of independence and will get over it, "Swallow your pride and call her. Grovel. Women love that." Phillip tells her it's hopeless.

Chloe wanders outside and gets a call from Kate. Kate gives her the day off. She hangs up and says, "Enjoy it... as if it's your last day on earth."

Suddenly Chloe wretches. She grabs her tummy and collapses. On her way down, she thinks, "This is what I get for having that second helping of chowdah at the pub."

Nathan finds Maggie and Stephanie at the nurses' station. Lexie rushes up and announces Stephanie got the job. Congrats all around. Maggie hugs Stephanie. Lexie hugs Stephanie. Following in Dr. Daniel's footsteps Nathan grabs her and they share an uncomfortable hug.

Daniel wanders up and discovers Chloe. He applies a little mouth-to-mouth and hand-to-breast.

Lexie gushes over Stephanie's new job and then leaves. Nathan moves in. Stephanie wonders if he ever works. Melanie calls and Stephanie tells her she can't go out on the ferry trip because she just got a new job. Melanie talks her into it. Stephanie hangs up and tells Nathan she's going to be with Melanie.

"A word of advice," says Nathan, "Don't play cards with her."

Melanie stands in Maggie's kitchen and makes a call to invite Phillip on the outing. Maggie finds her and asks what she is up to.

EJ tells Will Nicole convinced him a custody suit wasn't in his best interest, "You can come up and see Johnny any time."

Will tells him that won't be necessary since he worked things out with Sami, "I was able to work things out because of Rafe." EJ says he doesn't want his awkwardness with Sami to come between him and Will. He says he liked the stories Will told at Grace's service and wishes he had those memories. Will offers to send him some pictures of Grace he has on his computer. EJ thanks him and they shake hands as Mia walks up.

Sami offers to help Rafe unpack. "I thought I already did unpack," says Rafe.

"Unpacking," says Sami, "is more than taking things out of boxes and stringing them all over the place."

"Y'know," says Rafe, "We can unpack when the kids are here. I can think of something we can do since they aren't here." Sami reels him in.

Miracle working Daniel brings Chloe back to life. The audience boos. Chloe looks up at him, "Daniel, you saved me and I love you." Daniel moves in for a little more mouth-to-mouth.

EJ gives Will his email address: moron@dimeramansion.com. Will sees Mia and makes introductions. EJ tells him they have met.

Rafe and Sami engage in couch calisthenics. Suddenly, Sami squeals, jumps and pulls a pepper mill out from under her, "What is THIS?"

"It's a pepper mill," says Rafe, "but it doesn't work."

"Then we'll throw it away," says Sami.

"No, you can't," says Rafe, "I plan to fix it some day. It's a souvenir from Mishawaka, Indiana."

"Why does that town have meaning," asks Sami, "Was that your first FBI case? Is it the pepper mill capital of the world?"

"No," says Rafe, "I was just there once and needed a souvenir." He suggests they hit the bedroom where there are no pepper mills.

They get up to go in, but Sami discovers an ugly painting, "Yuck," she says, "I have just the place for this – The dumpster."

Rafe grabs it away from her and asks, "You mean you don't like this?"

Rafe is preoccupied at the moment. However, were he to consult the Guy Manual, he would find the following advice, "Worry about the damn painting later."

Melanie tells Maggie she's redirecting her sneakiness in a positive way. Maggie reminds her about the old classic, Emma the Matchmaker, "Whatever she tries is a disaster."

Melanie winks, "Until the end when she bags the rich guy with the great hair?" They chuckle together and Melanie leaves.

Stephanie arrives at the Horton cabin and calls for Melanie, who is absent. She contemplates the huge engagement ring she has conveniently forgotten to return, "I know I'm dong the right thing."

Chloe begs Daniel not to go, "I know there is someone else but I love you. Please don't leave me."

Daniel says, "I'm sorry, I have to move on. So many patients... so little time to grope."

When told it was Bastille Day Chloe asked, "Who would want to steal a smelly old fish?"

We pop back to reality. Chloe lies on the pavement and rots. Kate comes up and stares at her, "It's going to get a lot worse, Chloe."

Phillip arrives at the Horton cabin, accompanied by Melanie. Apparently, Melanie has dropped Phillip's phone into the water. She goes back to the dock for her sunscreen while Phillip heads into the bedroom to change into his swimsuit.

Outside, Melanie bumps into Stephanie and tells her to go put on her bathing suit. Stephanie goes in and undresses. Of course, Phillip walks out. They both stand there and contemplate each other's semi-nakedness.

Will takes the "J-Man" to the swings while Mia and EJ talk. EJ says, "It seems like every time I go to church I bump into you."

"Your wife has been really nice to me," says Mia. She says she can see EJ is a great dad.

Rafe positions the ugly picture on the wall. Sami isn't thrilled. Rafe says he can't do it to her. Sami catches on and says she won't fall for his nonsense any more. Nonsense ensues. They work their way back to the couch. Sami flops down and gets another surprise. She digs the offending artifact out from under her and finds a set of rings in a jewel box.

Kate arrives at Daniel's apartment. She rants about him not being at the studio to do voice overs. Daniel tells her he's leaving town and quits the show.

Chloe is in the hospital. Lexie, as usual, can't figure out what is going on. She orders tests and turns to look at Chloe. Chloe lies in bed and rattles and vibrates. She spits green bile and turns her head 360°.

Sami stares at the rings and gushes forth. She just can't believe this, "OMG, Rafe!" Just as Sami is about to set a date and pick out her umpteenth wedding dress, Rafe puts the brakes on and tells her it's a mistake. Sami's balloon bursts, "Oh, I see. They are Emily's rings."

Mia tells EJ she loved Grace and loves Johnny. EJ tells her she's too young to get concerned about child welfare issues, "Don't take things too seriously. I mean, you're on DOOL, so you're obviously not taking your career too seriously." Will brings back Johnny. He and Mia head for the movies.

EJ watches them ride into the sunset, "Something very strange about that girl."

Stephanie dresses. Phillip insists he didn't have anything to do with this. He asks her not to be mad at Melanie for arranging things. Stephanie tells him she got the job at the hospital and Phillip starts to leave. Melanie stops him and tells him he can't go. Stephanie asks him to wait, too.

Lexie asks Nathan to get Chloe's records. He leaves. Lexie stares, "It sure is great to have someone around here who knows less about medicine than I do."

Kate rants. Daniel reinforces the fact that he's quitting the hospital and leaving town. Kate spies the vile vial and flashes back to planting it. She thinks, "Of course I'm delighted. What could prove your guilt more than running away." Daniel refuses to do another show. "You won't do it, even to help Chloe," asks Kate.

Lexie figures she has to get in touch with Lucas while unconscious Chloe dreams of being married to Daniel. In her dream, a child cries in the background and they discuss their family. Daniel decides he has to go take care of the baby, "I'm a sucker for beautiful girls with big... ... ... blue eyes."

Kate tells Daniel Lucas will have questions when he gets back and finds Daniel gone, "It will help Chloe answer them if she has closure."

Will and Mia arrive at the Java Café. It seems the blockbuster hit 'Mutants" was sold out. They spy Chad and Kinzie across the room. Will asks her if she wants to go to a Kinzie free zone.

Kinzie asks Chad why he's drooling over Mia, "She's like tapioca – bland and lumpy. What is it about that girl?"

"I like the fact that she has a poor vocabulary," says Chad.

"I've heard her talk," says Kinzie, "but I haven't noticed anything unusual about her vocabulary."

"It lacks the word 'no,'," says Chad.
He flashes back to a conversation with Mia in school. Chad asks her out. He pops back to reality and seethes as he watches Will and Mia giggle and smooch.

Sami says she understands the fact that Rafe wanted to keep the rings to remember Emily. Rafe tells her the rings and Emily are in his past and Sami is in his future. Sami dives in for more. She leans back on the couch, squeals and sits up. She reaches behind her and pulls out a kitchen sink. That does it. They head for the bedroom.

The crowd at the Horton cabin realizes they are stuck with each other as Melanie informs them, "The ferry won't come for another couple of hours."

"I didn't even know Chris was invited," says Phillip.

Melanie tells Phillip and Stephanie they have unfinished business and leaves.

Kinzie tells Chad about Will and Mia, "I guess he met her after she got back from rehab."

"Rehab?"

"You didn't know?"

"No, I didn't."

No candles, no afterglow, no pillow talk. Sami and Rafe have completed their clinical procedure and are back in the living room. Sami bustles around looking for her keys. She's late for picking up Johnny. Instead of the keys, she finds the rattle Caroline gave to Grace and gets all moody. Rafe chimes in, "It's good we still have some of Grace's things, because Grace will be a part of the family for all the Days Of Our Lives."

"You're just a softie," says Sami. She moves in on him again and suddenly Rafe is no longer a softie.

EJ sits on a park bench with Sydney and mumbles about Johnny. Sami walks up. In a real continuity SNAFU, Sydney turns into Johnny.

Sami takes Johnny and Rafe walks up. The three of them head out to get Allie who is currently treading water beside the "No swimming – dangerous chemicals in the water" sign at the abandoned quarry.

EJ gets up and pushes Sydney in her stroller, "Enjoy it while it lasts, Samantha, because it won't last long."

Phillip tells Stephanie wants to say a proper goodbye. Translation: One for the road. They vow their undying love forever.

Melanie stands outside and thinks about what's going on inside, "Damn, I'm good."

Nathan is back with Lexie. He gets a call and leaves. Lexie gets frustrated, "I'll just have to page Daniel because I sure as hell can't diagnose anything."

Chloe moans, "No... no... don't call Daniel. I don't want him anywhere near me." Lexie says Daniel is their best shot at figuring out what's wrong.

Out at the nurses' station, Daniel gives Maxine a letter for Dr. Carver, "It's my letter of resignation."

Kate stands at her apartment door and hands an envelope to a ne'er-do-well, "There it is... payment in full."

Mr. Ugly says, "I'm glad I never got on your bad side."

Kate goes back inside and plays with the incriminating recording. We hear Daniel say, "If I can't have you, no one will."

Kate switches off the recorder, "Checkmate!"

Prevuze


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8 Comments:

Anonymous Berg said...

HAHAHAHHAHA!! The Deidra and Drake photo is priceless, That's more action than John has had is the last three years. You have to wonder if Deidra is cringing inside.

Poor stupid, clearly lacking a brain EJ. This has got to stop - oh the humanity!

I know many EJAMIs are hoping the show is headed in that direction, but I am just not seeing it on screen. (either put them together or make EJ a bad arse for crying out loud). EJ seems spiteful and bitter (which he should - given the circumstances). So either, they are putting EJ is a similar position where he hates Sami like Sami hated him back on that faithful Dec. 29 day and something changes for both of them. Or I have no clue. I am Luclueless.

I like me some Phillip - artifical parts and all. I like him bad though. I am not sure I can take more Steponme - "I love you but I can't be with you - I am a saint".

Another show - another crappy s/l if anything, the show has been consistent.

4:12 AM  
Anonymous Leslie said...

Sami hangs up as Rafe joins her, "What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

You're good at it."

SMACK!

Since we’re back to scintillating dialogue between Sami and Rafe, we must have entered the witless protection program zone part deux. The story board for these scenes has gotten to written in crayon.

Following in Dr. Daniel's footsteps Nathan grabs her and they share an uncomfortable hug.

That would mean that Nathan grabbed Stephanie by the butt.

Daniel wanders up and discovers Chloe. He applies a little mouth-to-mouth and hand-to-breast.

There you go – a typical Dr. Cop-A-Feel moment!!

EJ gives Will his email address: moron@dimeramansion.com.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! I wonder what Sami’s e-mail address is? Could it be whackjob@pick-a-pole.com? How about Kate? mommydearest@poisonapple.com. I could go on and on but I will spare you. Have at it everyone!

"No, you can't," says Rafe, "I plan to fix it some day. It's a souvenir from Mishawaka, Indiana."

Good gravy! I hope the writing team has a very limited crayon budget. This dialogue is positively painful. Someone obviously thinks this is entertainingly funny – not!!

She digs the offending artifact out from under her and finds a set of rings in a jewel box.

I know Rafe is a lunk head but this is plain everyday stupid. He’s ex-FBI so he ought to know a thing or two about hiding evidence.

They head for the bedroom.

What an aphrodisiac – finding the wedding ring intended for your lover’s dead fiancée. Apparently, it doesn’t take much to turn on Sami.

"The ferry won't come for another couple of hours."

"I didn't even know Chris was invited," says Phillip.

Naughty, naughty Prevuze!

"You're just a softie," says Sami. She moves in on him again and suddenly Rafe is no longer a softie.

Oh my, that one’s even naughtier!

This is a truly stellar edition of Prevuze, and the icing on the cake is the Deirdre/Drake photo! Way to go Prevuze!!!!

5:32 AM  
Blogger Prevuze said...

"You're just a softie," says Sami. She moves in on him again and suddenly Rafe is no longer a softie.

Oh my, that one’s even naughtier!


Yeah. Probably should have censored that one. I got lazy. Watching this show seems to have that effect.

5:54 AM  
Anonymous Steel Velvet said...

Berg, I don't see how you can see it any other way than with Ejami reuniting.

Rafe is the new Lucas, Sami's settle for guy so dumb she can play him.

I wish Phil would get tired of Stephanie and her I want him, no I don't. Why is he such a glutton for punishment? First Chloe, Belle and now Stephanie.

6:10 AM  
Blogger Applecheeks said...

Bulldog & Prevuze were on a roll with pictures once more. Funny as hell!

Commentors are rolling too. Berg...I have no clue. I am Luclueless." lolol Don't worry, we all are when it comes to this show.

Leslie...Sami’s e-mail address...whackjob@pick-a-pole.com?" Just cracked me up.

There were so many HUH?! moments in this stupid episode I stopped noting them. My top two:

EJ says he doesn't want his awkwardness with Sami to come between him and Will.

Kate tells Daniel Lucas will have questions when he gets back and finds Daniel gone
.

Since when did EJ & Will become pals? Will & EJ are both upset with Sami, but the last time Will really had anything to do with EJ he was on the verge of killing him so EJ wouldn't marry his mom. (In fact, I still think Will was the shooter and Lucas took the blame for him. But that's storyline under the bridge.)

As for HUH?! #2, why should Daniel care what Lucas thinks about him leaving?

Would love to stay and rant some more, but had better get some work done. Your work is done, Prevuze. At least until tomorrow!

7:21 AM  
Anonymous Bulldog said...

I'm sitting in the dentist's waiting room this morning contemplating which is worse - the dentist's drill or watching DOOL. Drill or DOOL. I couldn't decide so I pulled out the Prevuze I'd printed off and at least had some laughs (I was the only one in there) before the torture began.

Is that Rafe's actual painting or was that a Prevuism? I could do without that painting. Now, the companion piece with the cheating Bulldogs - that's a real classic. HAHAHAHA

What made me LOL was the picture of Sydney. But other great Prevuisms not mentioned - Chloe and Bastille day and turning her head 360.

And Berg - your comment reminded me of some dialogue from Seinfeld:

Elaine: "Don't you see what's happening? I'm George! I'M GEORGE!"

Jerry: "Don't say that!"


Don't say your Luclueless. It can't be that bad! HA

Great Prevuze today! Thanks for taking my mind off the hole in my tooth.

9:46 AM  
Anonymous WingNut '75 said...

Daniel wanders up and discovers Chloe. He applies a little mouth-to-mouth and hand-to-breast.

Boy - shows you where my mind is today. I read "He applies a little mouth-to-breast recessitation."

Nathan moves in. Stephanie wonders if he ever works.

And we all wonder if ANYBODY in Salem ever works...

"Your wife has been really nice to me," says Mia. She says she can see EJ is a great dad.

A really great dad, but a really big moron.

"The ferry won't come for another couple of hours."
"I didn't even know Chris was invited," says Phillip.


Naughty Prevuze - 2 minute minor. Now go to the penalty box! :-)

"You're just a softie," says Sami. She moves in on him again and suddenly Rafe is no longer a softie.

I was expecting a censored link for that one! Naughty again, Prevuze! - though I see you've been proprly chastized by Leslie and offered a contrite apology. Good Prevuze! :-)

And the last picture of Doc and Squints is priceless! Crappy, boring show, great Prevuze - thanks for taking yet another one for the team!

11:00 AM  
Anonymous Berg said...

LMAO! Doc and Squints

1:53 PM  

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