Veiled Vulgarity

Cat: "Let's leave the past behind us." Where else would you leave it? #DAYS

Chad to EJ: "Since I broke up with Cat I know you'd like to be there to pick up the pieces." I'll bet he's hoping for a piece or two. Or more. #DAYS

Leo calls Stephanie the Vixen of Veiled Vulgarity. From what I've heard about "One Stormy Night" there is nothing veiled about the vulgarity. #DAYS

Coming...

EJ knocks at Belle's door. Belle: "Coming…" In the next scene I think Gabi just said the same thing to Phillip. #DAYS

Belle to EJ: "I don't want you mansplaining things to me." Then she breaks into a tirade. It seems the only difference betwee3n mansplaining and womansplaining is gender. #DAYS

Suddenly Theo is coming across like he's not really autistic and Phillip is coming across like he's not really missing a leg. #DAYS

Marlena says she admires Belle's strength and resilience. Clearly she's not referring to the times Belle kept telling EJ they were through as she ran into the bedroom with him. #DAYS

Shock Therapy, A Lobotomy, and Leeches

Kayla: "I'm sure you would rather do other things than shopping with me." Steve: "No, baby, I don't mind shopping with you at all." It's not the first lie he ever told Kayla. #DAYS

That opening shot of the College dorms looks like the buildings in the aftermath of Chernobyl… which, by the way is standard design for all college dorms. While we're at it, college dorms are palaces compared to off campus slums. Speaking from experience. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Holly: "What happened to those pictures you had of my boobs?" Johnny: "Don't worry. They're gone. I deleted them… right after I had a few 8x10 glossies made. #DAYS

Phillip says he isn't in a position to make Gabi an offer she can't refuse. Gabi gets him in a different position and comes up with an offer he can't refuse. Just for the record, Phillip doesn't refuse. #DAYS

Leo to Javi: "An avocado is a vegetable not a fruit." Speaking of vegetables, can we get an update on Sophia's condition? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Mrs. Choi: "What is your treatment plan for Sophia?" Sarah: "Shock therapy followed by a lobotomy, then leeches." #DAYS

A Whining Loudmouth Self-Centered Buttinski

Given his youth and inexperience, in Theo's case "CEO stands for "Child Executive Officer." #DAYS

Paulina: "This looks like high noon at the OK Corral." More like the "Not OK Corral. #DAYS

Sophia: "I think I'm going to deal with this on my own." How's that been going for you so far? #DAYS

Stephanie offered to help Alex. Alex refused. When a male on #DOOL refuses the help of a female, disaster always follows. Because… you know… audience demographics.#DAYS

Alex tp Stephanie: "Why would Jeremy be bringing you flowers?" Figure it out, Alex. I don't think it's because he's her gardener. #DAYS

Stephanie: "I told Jeremy I had moved on." In her case since she was with Jeremy she has moved on and on and on and on… and… #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Chad: "Thomas is so much like his mom." Jeremy: "You mean Abby was a whining loudmouth self-centered buttinski?" #DAYS

A Pact With The Devil

 If Susan ever puts that outfit up for sale Leo will snap it up. #DAYS

Marlena says she's been a little run down lately. If you're a "little run down" in Salem, you might as well reserve the only bed in Salem Hospital and carve out time for the coming crisis. #DAYS

Theo: "Tony is a little less devious than EJ or Kristen." Theo must've missed the scene we just saw between Toni and Gabi. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Abe: "Theo has made a pact with the devil." Belle: "Is Marlena possessed again?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Marlena: "Say something nice about Xander." Sarah: "He doesn't dress up like a clown and kidnap people very often." #DAYS

We'll Always Have Salem

When you really think about it, Chad and Cat's hot mess of a relationship boils down to a one-night-stand. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Cat: "Chad broke up with me." EJ: "Are you busy tonight?" #DAYS

Brady says the traffic in Salem is terrible today. In fact it's twice as heavy as usual. There are two cars at the town stoplight instead of one. #DAYS

In the town square Jennifer prays to St. Tom and St. Alice. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL —  EJ: "Rachel couldn't get away from me fast enough." Marlena: "She's learning early in life to be a cold-hearted bitch." #DAYS

Tate: "If that plane leaves the ground and you're on it, you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life." Holly: "What does that mean for us?" Tate: "You'll never have Paris... but we'll always have Salem."

Parthenogenesis

Next on #DOOL — Johnny: "Holly couldn't have sent those salacious photos." Chanel: "You're right. So who else do you know with boobs like that?" #DAYS

Tate to Sophia: "I need to talk to Holly." Parlez vous francais? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sarah: "If Tate isn't the father of your baby, you must have been with another guy." Sophia: "Or… would you believe… parthenogenesis?" #DAYS

What do Chad's relationship with Cat and the sex life of a stray dog in Tanzania have in common? Both of them are none of Jen and Julie's business. #DAYS

Tom's poem sounds like it was written by ChatGPT. #DAYS

Tom's poem sounds like it was written by ChatGPT. Apologies to ChatGPT for the comparison. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Julie: "You two certainly have some fond memories from your courtship. What is your favorite memory Jack?" Jack: "Jennifer's tight little ass." #DAYS

It's About Your Boobs

Artistic opening shot: Ari's butt, full screen.

Johnny (on phone): "Chanel and I would like to speak to you right away." Holly: "Is this about my paper?" No, it's about your boobs. #DAYS

Johnny: "I did everything by the book." Mein Kampf? #DAYS

ArI: "How do you like being back home." Theo: "Meh..." I think Ari is way more enthusiastic about him being in Salem than Theo is." #DAYS

A Grand Slam

Next on #DOOL — Thomas: "What were you doing all that time at Cat's place." Chad: "It's time to let you know we have feelings for each other." Thomas: "What does that mean?" Chad: "You're too young to know." #DAYS

Jennifer: "Jeremy has come back to Salem." How could Salem be so lucky?

Next on #DOOL — Thomas: "How could you think Cat was Mom?" Chad: "I'm a total idiot." #DAYS

Steve: "He was kind, generous and wise." And also the patriarch of one of the nuttiest bunch that ever came along. #DAYS

Jeremy: "The flowers I brought were just meant to be a peace offering." Peace or Piece? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jennifer: "I don't know how Chad can stand being around Cat." Steve: "Have you seen her ass?" #DAYS

Jennifer, do the letters "NOYB" mean anything to you? How About "STFU?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Cat: "During the blackout Chad spent the night at my apartment." Felicity: "Did you make out?" Cat: "Yes." Felicity: "Did he get to second base?" Cat: "It was more like a grand slam." #DAYS

Graphic Prurient Erotica

Fact: If two people's DNA doesn't match in a test at Salem Hospital that proves they are related. #DAYS

Poor Johnny. That picture of Holly's boobs doesn't show enough to get him in this much trouble. #DAYS

Chad: "Holly is sexting me." Brady: "Do you think they're real?" I saw them. There is no doubt they are real. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Cat: "That was the first time I've had sex since my car accident." Chad: "When was your accident?" Cat: "This morning." #DAYS

Stephanie: "If people knew I was Anastasia, it could wreck my PR business." Yeah, but as much as people eat up graphic prurient erotica, it might also HELP your PR business. #DAYS

Can Paulina give anyone a civil answer? #DAYS

Julie: "I'm part of a wonderful family." That's the same thing Charles Manson's followers said. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gwen: "Is Chad a frequent house guest of yours?" Cat: "Why do you want to know that? Gwen: "Do you really have to ask?" #DAYS