A Formula-1 Race Car

After getting slammed with a baseball bat, how is Xander's forearm not perpendicular to his body? #DAYS

Rafe seems to sense that Sami and Lucas had more fun than your average pair of hostages in the DiMera dungeon. #DAYS

I can't believe Xander doesn't have a broken arm after Lucas hit him with that baseball bat. Lucas must've bunted." #DAYS

If Kristen was any more high-maintenance she'd be a Formula-1 race car. #DAYS

Loose Lips Sink Ships

The doctors give Kate a 50-50 chance. If you stop to think about it, all
that means is she either will survive or she won't survive. #DAYS

Kristen may discover here the truth of the old saying "loose lips sink
ships." What kind of ships? Relation-ships. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Kayla: "My colleagues know I am a happily married
woman." Patch: "I only have eyes for you… when I'm around." #DAYS

Tripp Barges In

Tripp barges in or Steve and Kayla. Paylas-interruptus. #DAYS

If Jan is about to kill her, why is she so concerned that Claire can't
breathe? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Kayla: "Tripp couldn't intubate a patient, so Dr. Snider
castigated him." Patch: "That's pretty harsh. Now Tripp will never be
able to have children." #DAYS

Two Atoms Colliding

Shawn is messing with Jan's mind. That's the equivalent of two atoms colliding in a vacuum. #DAYS

Hey, Chad… just as soon as Abbynormal gets out of the house, have the locks changed. #DAYS

Stradivarius

I can't wait to see who commits adultery today. It looks like Chanel thinks Eli might be a candidate. #DAYS

Jan: "As a tax-paying citizen…" How much tax do you have to pay when you're in a coma? #DAYS

In a town full of crackpots, Jan stands out as a pot that is so cracked, like Humpty Dumpty all the king's horses and all the kings me couldn't put her back together again. #DAYS

Just call Jack Stradivarius because Gwen is playing him like a fiddle. #DAYS

A Pimp

Nicole wallows in guilt and shame after her peccadillo with Xander. I'm
not sure why. The only thing she needs to make her life complete is a
pimp. #DAYS

We all know Kate's not dead. She's been killed more than Kenny on South
Park.

Allie: "I ran into an old friend from Europe." Nicole: "It's a small
world after all." Now I'll have that damn song running through my brain
all afternoon. #DAYS

DOPE

Jake: "I don't know what to say." Kate: "Then don't say anything." She's got a point. Jake could be on the verge of talking himself out of two women right now. #DAYS

Gimme a D

Gimme an O

Gimme a P

Gimme an E

What's that spell?

ERIC!

#DAYS

The Morning-After Blues

Nicole has a case of the "morning-after blues." You'd think with her
history she'd be accustomed to waking up and realizing she'd made a
mistake. #DAYS

Whereas no one would think of Xander as Salem's premiere life coach, in
this case he's right about Eric being a failure as a husband. #DAYS

There seems to be trouble in the Rafe-Lucas faction of Sami's ex-husband
club. #DAYS

Jake: "Every time I look at you my heart skips a beat." Maybe Gabi
planted a rigged pacemaker in Jake like she did with Juie. #DAYS

Gabi to Jake: "You made me believe in love again." There is a fine line
between love except for in Salem where they can be one in the same. #DAYS

Put The Girls Away

 

 

Blubbering Kristen

Patch: "Well, if it isn't my favorite police commissioner." Patch changes his tune when he finds out Rafe is dating his not so favorite baby-mama. #DAYS

Blubbering Kristen pouring her heart out about how she's at fault and caused Brady's injuries might want to consider STFU. #DAYS

Scenes we'd like to see: Sami/Stan and Kristen/Kate start dating. #DAYS

Kate Who?

 

 

Udderly Incredible

Brady: "Susan, you're not going anywhere." And probably it's a crime to switch place with a prisoner, so she and Kristen could wind up doing time together. #DAYS

I have a tomato plant that is smarter than Lucas… and far more ethical. #DAYS

If those doll clothes fit Barbie Gabi could have a million-dollar business idea on her hands. #DAYS

Sami: "Kristen is capable of anything." And probably the hit of any Halloween party what with her wardrobe of disguises. #DAYS

What Rafe should have said as he admired Ava's low-cut dress: "You look udderly incredible." #DAYS

You've got to admire the way Jake got over Kate so fast. Let's see, it was about the same amount of time it would take to hustle Gabi upstairs. #DAYS

Money, Men, and Martinis

 

 

Just. Plain. Wrong.

Bonnie: "You can never get too much hot sauce." Scenes we'd like to see: Bonnie's reaction after getting way too much hot sauce. #DAYS

Chanel: "My marriage to Xavier is over." Lani: "That's Xander." And obviously it was a deep, loving relationship. #DAYS

That recording would be inadmissible in some states. Don't know what the ruling on that would be in Illinois or whatever Land of Oz Salem is located in. #DAYS

Adrienne's doppelganger dating Justin is… Just. Plain. Wrong. #DAYS

There's A Butt, And You Need To Grab It

Gwen takes a tumble down the Madeline Peterson Memorial steps. #DAYS

Lucas: "Chloe has just morphed into Florence Nightingale." That would set health care back at least 100 years. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Ava: "That kiss was the nicest thing that's happened to me in a long time… but…" Rafe: "Oh, there's a but?" Ava: "Yes, there's a butt, and you need to grab it the next time we kiss." #DAYS

Lucas: "It's not skin off my teeth if EJ finds out we slept together." If EJ finds out Lucas may have no teeth left. #DAYS

Nicole: "From now on I'm staying out of other people's lives." In Salem "from now on" translates to "until the end of the week." #DAYS

If Rafe doesn't bang Ava's lights out after that conversation he loses his 'guy card.' #DAYS