Target

Fun Fact: Did you know there is a department store chain named after EJ – Target. #DAYS

If they save his life, maybe EJ will make a big donation and save the hospital. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Cat: "Do you need to call anyone?" Chad: "EJ's insurance agent. I want to see if I'm his life insurance beneficiary." #DAYS

So EJ was shot through the heart but he's not dead. Pepto Bismol works wonders. #DAYS

It's Not Cheating Unless It's Cheating

Belle should have gotten back with EJ and THEN worn the wire once he trusted her. Of course she would have had to "compromise her honor" to do that but I'm guessing that wouldn't have been a problem. #DAYS

I'm already wondering who shot EJ and he hasn't been shot yet. #DAYS

Situational recap: It's not cheating if you don't know you're cheating. Unless your partner decides it's cheating. Then it's still not cheating but it might as well have been. #DAYS

Look at the bright side: Everyone hating on EJ won't be guilty of shooting him. Only one of them will. Unless this is a "Murder on the Orient Express" situation. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe: "We both know you wouldn't try to kill EJ." Gabi: "It's not about trying. It's about succeeding." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Shawn: "How could I have been so stupid?" JJ: "I would think you should know. You have a PhD in stupid." #DAYS

Shawn: "How could I have been so stupid?" This from the guy who deliberately drove his motorcycle through a church stained-glass window. #DAYS

Estonia

Patch asked Bob Dylan when it would be the right time to go to Estonia. Dylan replied...
Estonia when you're walkin' 'long the street
Estonia when you're tryin' to keep your seat
Estonia when you're walkin' on the floor
Estonia when you're walkin' to the door

EJ texts Belle: "I moss you." Translation: "I'm horny."

Orpheus to Marlena: "I'm going to get rid of you and your meddlesome husband for good." Sounds like a death threat, Doc. This might be a good time to ram your knee into the family jewels. #DAYS

Orpheus says the love between John Black and Marlena Evans is eternal. It must be, they always get remarried after their string of multiple divorces. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — The guys looking for John decide to incorporate and name the company after themselves. They call it Steve Andrew Paul Services, then shorten it to its initials: SAPS. #DAYS

Belle agrees to wear a wire. Won't EJ find it when she takes her clothes off? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jada: "I have something painful to tell you." Rafe: "You can tell me anything." Jada: "I slept with Shawn." Rafe: "You can't tell me that." #DAYS

Patch: "Where did they move the nuclear device to?" Karl: "Rosebud." They put them on a sled? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jada: "Tell me how I can fix the fact that I slept with Shawn." Rafe: "Go back in time and don't screw him." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "Prove you're not wearing a wire. Take off your dress." Belle: "That line wouldn't work in the sleaziest dive bar in town, but I'll give you credit for originality." #DAYS

Letting Things Fester

Holly to Doug: "Tattling on you like a two-year-old… who does that?" Tate. #DAYS

Alex butts in on on Sarah and Stephanie. Does anyone in Salem ever say, "Excuse us, but this is a private conversation." #DAYS

Holly and Tate are meant for each other. When they graduate I hope they can both get into the same nursery school. #DAYS

Couldn't Stephanie and Sarah just claim this is a mixup about Stephanie's previous relationship with Phillip? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Stephanie: "I'm not sleeping with Phillip but we are sharing a secret." Alex: "What is that secret?" Stephanie: "What part of 'secret' confused you?" #DAYS

Patch: "Neither Shane nor you can stop me." Andrew: "I'm just here monitoring the situation." Translation: Shane has him there to babysit Patch. #DAYS

When will the people of Salem learn sometimes it's better to tell the truth and suffer the consequences instead of keeping secrets and letting things fester until they become World War III? I'm talking to you, Sarah, Stephanie, Kate, Phillip, and now Alex. #DAYS
 
Steve: "Someone here is building a nuclear device." Andrew: "They're going to sell it to the highest bidder. The ISA is concerned it might fall into the wrong hands." It's a black-market nuclear device… is there any such thing as the "right hands?" #DAYS

Doing It With Wesson Oil

Gabi to Javi: "Maybe JJ stepped out to get something." I don't know about now, but by the looks of the meal he's set up it looks like JJ is going to get something after dinner. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Doug (on phone): "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Holly: "No… I'm still dressed." #DAYS

Cat smears mustard all over Chad. The way things are going with them, they're only one step away from her doing it with Wesson Oil. #DAYS

So basically the method Marlena wants Patch to use to find John is to just find him. #DAYS

Tate rats out Doug III: "What was I thinking?" You were thinking, "a few years in prison or being completely ostracized by Salemites will help keep Douggie from Holly." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "Let me explain, son…" Johnny: "Don't you dare call me son!" EJ: "OK, let me explain, my little bastard…" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Holly: "Take off your wet clothes and I'll put them in the dryer." Doug III: "Your clothes look a little damp. You should take them off and dry them with mine to save energy." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "If I hadn't raped your mother, you wouldn't have been born." Johnny: "Don't try to wiggle out of this on a technicality." #DAYS

Doug III to Holly: "What's Tate going to think about me camping out in your bedroom?" He's going to think about grabbing his dad's shotgun and coming over for a visit. #DAYS

When we get to the "Who shot EJ" part of this plot, the answer will be: A firing squad consisting of half the people in Salem. #DAYS

Spineless, Soulless, Self-Serving, Snake

Next on #DOOL — Joy: "We need to clear the air." Alex: "You're right. And I hope you'll excuse me for farting." #DAYS

Theresa has to go to California to be with Kimberly. This paves the way for Gwen to come back. #DAYS

EJ: "Where do you get off?" Kate: "Upstairs in bed with Roman." #DAYS

Kate to EJ: "Roman could wipe the floor with you." If EJ was unconscious. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gabi to Javi: "You are a cereal monogamist." Javi: "No, sometimes I buy more than one brand of cereal at a time."

EJ's chickens are coming home to roost, bringing with them the Kate Roberts version of the bird flu. #DAYS

Mother Blake says EJ should have to pay for all his sins. If he does the DiMeras would go bankrupt. #DAYS

Protip: If you have a stolen high-profile item like, for example, a family heirloom necklace, don't walk around town wearing it for everyone to see. #DAYS

DougIII likes reading the little poems Doug left for Julie. For example: "Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Addie is dead, I'm coming after you." #DAYS

Rachael to EJ: "You spineless, soulless, self-serving, snake." Nice alliteration. #DAYS

Rachael should never have let EJ know the serum didn't work. She needs to learn to play things close to the vest. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Holly: "We've got some time to ourselves. What do you want to do?" Tate: "Hang out, watch a movie, order pizza, bang your lights out…" #DAYS

A Souvenir

Q: What do you call Marlena when she's upset? A: A Thera-pissed. #DAYS

Alex looks like someone dipped him in a vat of spray tanning fluid. #DAYS

Scenes We'd like to see: Shane's secretary walks in and hands him a message saying his job as Federal Director of the ISA has been eliminated by Elon Musk. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Shane: "Mission details are on a need-to-know basis." Steve: "Great. I need to know." #DAYS

Phillip to Joy: "I think you still have feelings for Alex." Maybe or maybe not, but she definitely has a souvenir from their relationship. #DAYS