Wonderful Bones

Maggie adjusts Mickey's funeral picture as the gang walks in and everyone tells her it was a lovely ceremony. How fitting that, just like Mickey, his funeral also doesn't make the show. Maggie leaves to do something and we learn that Alice is in the den with Marie and Bill and all those other people we think should be at the funeral, but aren't. Doug wonders where Bo is.

Bo finds Carly at the hospital. He tells her he's on the way to Maggie's, but wants to give Hope some time to brood, feel sorry for herself and rationalize why this is all his fault. Carly encourages him to get over there.

Maggie opens the front door and Melissa stands there. Big hugs. "I'm just beside myself that the plane was delayed and I missed the funeral," she says.

"That's OK," says Maggie, "So did Mickey, but all that's important is you're here now." Melanie walks in and offers hors o'dourves as the girls cry. Nathan comes in and hugs Mommy.

Back at the kitchen, EJ knocks and Brady answers. EJ pops his head in, "I just came to offer my condolences."

Brady sneers, "Send a card. You're not welcome here."

"Is an e-card all right," asks EJ, "You know, one of those irritating blue mountain things that is one step above spam? "

Arianna fiddles around the pub and answers a knock at the door. Rafe shows up. He says he has Syd-napping news.

Stefano opens an envelope and goes through a bunch of papers, "Veeeerrrrry interesting. Hmmm..."

Vivian sits in the Kiriakis den and computes. Victor reads his newspaper. Apparently Vivian is searching for girls and we learn there are 150,000 females in Salem. Well, that certainly narrows down the search for Carly's daughter. Vivian gripes about everything Carly has done, "That cold-blooded bitch. I couldn't come to Lawrence's rescue when he was alive, but I'll avenge his honor now that he is gone."

Anna sits on the couch with Sydney and wonders why EJ hasn't called.

Victor wonders if Carly has reached out to her daughter yet and if anyone has seen her doing so. Vivian remembers the cell phone picture, "OMG! I know who Carly's daughter is."

"Well," snorts Victor, "Are you going to tell us?"

"Are you kidding," asks Vivian, "That's what any normal, reasonable person would do at this point, but we have to drag it out until the audience runs out screaming."

Doug, Julie, Mia and Hope watch as Brady tells EJ to get lost. Doug referees and tells EJ it's OK. EJ thanks them all and comes in. He pontificates about Mickey and how things were when he was working for him, "We shared a terrific personal moment together the time we came ttthhhiiiss close to winning a case." He asks them to give his condolences to Maggie. Hope thanks him for coming and says she is praying for Sydney's safe return. We all hold hands and sing Kum Ba Yah and then EJ leaves.

Arianna thinks Rafe's news isn't really news because Nicole has already said she thought she knew the kidnapper. Whatever that means. But hey, how can you expect a clueless agent to come up with a clue? Arianna asks what his next move will be. "I'm gonna do what a detective does when he hits a wall," says Rafe, "Scrape myself off of it and slam my head back into it just to make sure it's real. Then I think I'll go back to the scene of the crime."

Stefano calls Mr. Davis, "Elvis is about to get a little lesson... from the master."

Vivian refuses to say who Carly's daughter is until she's absolutely certain she's right, "I'm off to get the truth straight from the horse's mouth." Victor watches the other end of the horse as she leaves.

Carly works and remembers her elevator encounter with Vivian, "I will kill you before you lay a hand on my daughter."

Bo arrives at Maggie's with Alice's meds. He and Hope catch a glimpse of each other. Matter meets antimatter. Bo announces he'll just take the meds to Alice and then leave. Hope stops him as he starts to go, "You can stay if you want."

Back in the living room, Mia and Melanie offer to take the extra funeral flowers to the hospital.

Nathan drags Stephanie up to introduce her to his mom. Melissa gushes, "Oh, you must be Melanie. I've heard soooo much about you."

Rafe leaves the pub and Troy stalks. He is on the phone with Mr. Sleazy, "She's alone now, so it's time for you to finish the job." He hangs up and looks through the window, "The next funeral in this town will be yours, senorita Hernandez."

Melissa is embarrassed for mixing up Stephanie and Melanie. We work through that unfortunate issue as Maggie comes and hauls Nathan off to go see aunt Sarah. Melissa apologizes to Stephanie again, "I heard Melanie was a troubled soul and clearly that's not you." Troubled Stephanie stares.

Bo and Hope are alone. He apologizes for hurting her. Hope claims she was a fool and says she hurt Bo, too, "The truth is I am partly responsible for what happened. So now that we're both so reasonable... It just feels like there is no going back now."

Bo knows better than to say it out loud, but the thought crosses his mind, "My prayers have been answered."

Vivian comes up to Carly and startles her. Carly storms off. Mia and Melanie arrive with the flowers. Vivian watches, "This must be my lucky day."

Sleazeball stalks, but runs as Brady goes into the pub. He smooches Arianna and tells her about Mickey's wake. He offers to help her before they open but she turns him down. And he's off. That was what is known as a hit and run.

Sleazeroo puts on a ski mask and goes into the pub.

Anna rambles on about EJ not returning her calls, "Maybe it's time to shake things up a bit."

Stephanie asks, "What made you think I would not find out?"

"About what," asks EJ.

"What you have been doing behind my back," says Stefano, "Selling millions worth of DiMera stocks for bargain basement prices."

"I wasn't doing that behind your back," says EJ.

"Then tell me why you are doing it."

Suddenly, Rafe drops out of the sky, "I would actually like to know the same thing."

Maggie hands Nathan an envelope and tells him Mickey was able to get his latest arrest expunged from his record, "Can you believe it? He finally won his first case posthumously! Now it's as if you never were in jail."

That gets Mommy Melissa's attention, "JAIL?"

Hope remembers the last funeral she wasn't by Bo's side — Zack's. She spirals into a black hole of depression and sobs as Justin walks in.

Vivian says she's fallen behind on the wedding plans. Melanie reminds her that she and Phillip want a simple wedding and don't need any help. Vivian ignores her and turns to Mia, "I'm sorry... what was your name again."

"Mia."

"Wonderful bones," beams Vivian, "Did you get those from your mother?"

"Uh... yeah... I guess."

Vivian sees Carly walk out and decides it's time to scoot, "It's been lovely. I Hope to see you around... Mia."

The girls chuckle. Mia stammers, "Uh... she's strange."

"You really don't know the half of it." Melanie notices Carly puttering around, "Speaking of strange..."

Stefano wants to know how Rafe got in. Apparently he slid under the barbed wire on his chest and worked his way through the mud, avoiding the dogs, guards and surveillance system to get to the front door, which was open. Rafe asks about the sudden need for cash just like it might actually be any of his business.

Anna packs a bag and tells Sydney she has a contingency plan, "And spending more time with you would just be icing on the cake."

Bo and Hope hug as Justin closes the door just a wee bit too loud, in order to announce his presence. Hope thanks him for coming. Bo leaves to give them some privacy. Hope frowns.

Melissa gets on sonnyboy's case about the jail thing.

Nathan comes clean, "Look, I know both times I wound up in jail were stupid." Speaking of stupid...

Melissa has a cow, "BOTH TIMES! And did both have to do with Melanie?"

"NO... yeah."

"I don't have a good feeling about her."

"You're part of a big group then," says Nathan, "It doesn't matter — she's engaged." He apologizes for giving her a hard time, hugs her and says he plans to stay away from Melanie from now on. More hugs.

The girls start to leave but Carly butts in and asks about Melanie's ring, "Who's the lucky guy? Dr. Horton?"

"Boy," chokes Melanie, "You are really out of the loop. I'm getting married to Phillip Kiriakis." Carly offers her congratulations about the engagement and her condolences about Mickey, whom Melanie never really knew, and the girls walks off.

Sleaze-boy stalks into the pub, "Hands in the air!" The hands go up, the brown puddle hits the floor. Sleazer orders, "Go to the register and empty it."

Arianna walks over to the heat duct and starts pulling out the lint. "I mean the cash register," says Mr. Sleazy.

EJ says he's divesting himself of all things DiMera and establishing his own shady identity, "I want respect. I want a good name."

"Then don't change it to Hernandez," says Rafe, "Well... I have a long list of people to talk to so I'll be leaving." Wow, there's a thorough investigation for you. On his way out, Rafe hands EJ an updated sketch of Sydney. EJ unrolls it and we all get a look at the Gerber Baby Twin gone bad. All babies may not look alike, but all bad drawings of babies do.

Stefano says he misses Sydney. EJ jumps all over him and accuses him of being sentimental. He tells him to get used to loving Sydney from afar.

Arianna shakes like an out-of-control jackhammer and hands Sleazeroo the bag full of money. This is it. It's curtains for... but wait...

SUPERBRADY!!

Brady smacks Sleazo and the gun goes flying. Arianna runs for the gun. Sleaze and Brady take a few swings at each other, and then the Sleazster wiggles away and runs out. Brady chases.

Back at Maggie's, we roll into the post-funeral funeral. Julie starts, "How do I express my feelings for Uncle Mickey... All I can say is he was (say it with her) always there for me..." The crowd watches and then everyone takes a turn eulogizing Mickey. Hope... Nathan... Melissa... Melanie... and then Maggie... we get the "handsome stranger and the naïve farm girl flashback. "Let me take ya inta th' barn and show ya how t' make hay really useful," drawls Mick.

Finally, Doug toasts the ole Mickster.

Arianna dresses Brady's wounds as he worries about the fact he didn't catch the Sleazeball.

Vivian comes into the Kiriakis den and announces she spoke to Carly's daughter, "I'm 99% sure... no 99.5% sure I know who she is."

Victor isn't in any mood to play games, "Stop throwing percentages at me and tell me who she is!"

Vivian pauses to give it a bit of drama, "Carly's long lost daughter is a little blonde haired moppet named... MIA!"

Bo comes back to the hospital and Carly tells him she ran into Melanie and Mia, "And my daughter hates me. MELANIE hates me."

Melanie goes through an album looking at pictures of Maggie and Mickey.

Stefano catches Rafe in the foyer and tells him Elvis can be duplicitous, "You'd better keep an eye on him... He and Samantha are getting closer and closer all the time. Watch yourself." Rafe leaves.

All Ejamis will want to read the next section carefully, because every one of them misses the rest of the show as they dance in the aisles and PAR-TY.

Back at the cabin EJ tells Anna Rafe didn't suspect anything about the money. He tells her Phase II goes into action soon.

"And exactly what is Phase II," asks Anna.

"It's the phase that comes after Phase I," says EJ.

"And what was the purpose of Phase I," asks Anna.

"To figure out what to call the next phase," says EJ. He turns to Sydney, "And it's all for you, sweetheart."

Most of the crowd at Maggie's agree to meet at Chez Rouge for the celebrat... uh... post-funeral luncheon. They all file out and Maggie stands alone and surveys the empty house. She goes over to Mick's picture and remembers her wedding and other assorted scenes from their life. She lets out a single sob, walks up to the picture, kisses her hand, places in on the canvas, and then leaves.

Mickey walks into the living room. He looks around and calls out, "The coast is clear!" Out walks Bonnie and they share a passionate kiss. Mickey takes her hand and leads her out the door, heading to their new life on a secluded South Pacific island. Mickey smiles and turns to her, "We really pulled a fast one on them, didn't we?"

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