Somewhere Between Scared To Death And Halfway Crazy

Carly is in the Patch-n-Billie-ation ward with Melanie, Nathan and the Grim Reaper. She fills the hypo with the deadly Dungcootie Fever virus and...

JAM-PLUNGE!

She injects it into her arm. Dr. Daniel Jekyll stands outside watching the scene. Suddenly a switch flips and he turns into Mr. Dan Hyde. Deranged Mr. Hyde busts a gizzard. A guard comes up and tries to calm him down. Dan wheels around and lets him have it.

SMACK!

What happened to, "First, do no harm?"

Stephanie tells Phillip she's talking about him being Parker's father.

Rafe tries to convince EJ to let the kids come home for the holidays. EJ refuses. Braveheart begs Coldheart who says if Sami has any contact with the kids she goes to prison.

Nicole plays with Allie in the garden and serves fake tea. Sami watches and starts to come up to them but Nicole stops her. Sami insists Nicole give her Sydney.

Daniel takes the guard's keys and has him scram. He goes inside and asks Carly why she did that. Melanie and Nathan whine about her being in there, but it's too late, Carly is Dungcootie Fever-ized Daniel refuses to give her the drug. Carly begs, "If I don't get that drug, you know what the outcome is going to be."

Daniel says, "I realize it's life-or-death, but if your insurance doesn't cover it, you're toast."

Phillip says, "I know what you're talking about. I get it now."

"You'll get it when Daniel finds out," says Stephanie.

Rafe asks EJ to cut Will and Allie a little slack. EJ's not in a slack-cutting mood.

Nicole urges Sami to get away. Sami urges Nicole to take a flying leap.

Phillip thinks Stephanie heard Daniel tell him to look after Parker if something happens to Daniel. Stephanie says she gets it but Phillip still needs to hear the truth. Chloe stands behind them. "The truth about what," asks Clhoe.

Carly tells Daniel since he has a new baby she had to infect herself instead. She urges him to get out of the infected room. Daniel says the anti-virus could overwhelm her system since it was geared to his weight. "Well, I've gained a few pounds lately," says Carly. Melanie chimes in and asks Carly not to do this.

EJ says, "These are my final words on this." Don't we wish? "There will be absolutely no contact. Are we clear?" Rafe pulls out a family picture to prove all the kids are a family. EJ rips it apart, "Not any more."

Sami and Nicole fight over Sydney. King Solomon walks up and draws his sword, "I have a solution." Nicole tells Sami she's trespassing, "I'm here because EJ wants me here. It's bigger than me giving him the camera. It's about Sydney. She and I have a deep connection. You're jealous and insecure because she's never loved you the way she loves me."

Carly assures Melanie they will get through this. She begs Daniel for the drug. Daniel plans to stay in the room and get infected. "We don't have time," says Carly. She faints. Even though she's got one foot in the grave, Daniel refuses to give her the drug. Melanie goes to Freak-out-land. She tells Daniel if Carly gets really sick he has to give her the drug.

Rafe tells EJ he doesn't give a damn about his kids. EJ begs to differ. Rafe begs to differ with EJ's begging to differ. EJ begs... you get the idea. He claims in time the kids will drift apart and even forget their mother, "It will be like she didn't exist at all."

Sami denies Sydney could still love Nicole. Nicole disagrees and claims she's protecting Sydney, "For your information I just wanted to spend time with Sydney. I don't want sole possession."

"I am already aware you don't posses a sole," says Sami.

Machines beep. Daniel tells Nathan to hang in there. All those years of med-school and that's what he comes up with. Melanie tells Carly to be strong. Carly tells Melanie she loves her, "I know I've made some terrible mistakes... you were the biggest one of them." She tells Daniel if he doesn't inject her she won't last.

Daniel prepares the hypo.

Phillip 'splains. He says Stephanie means he will never be a good dad. Clhoe thinks he'll be a great dad. Parker and Pocket will cast the deciding votes.

Rafe says someday Johnny will run into Allie and they will wonder what happened to their mom. EJ says by then he will have brainwashed the kids into thinking their mother was a manipulative liar who tried to murder their father.

"You SOB," says Rafe.

"That's something I have in common with my kids," says EJ, "Well, I guess one of them is a Daughter of a..."

Sami says she just wants to hold Sydney for a few minutes. Nicole grabs Sami and yells for EJ.

Dr. Ben takes Chloe aside and tells her what Daniel has done, and also about Carly injecting herself. They figure both Carly and Daniel are now infected. "We have 3 doctors and a nurse in there. They all could die." At least the world of medicine will be better off.

There's a whole lotta coughin' goin' on in the isolation ward. Daniel tells Nathan to breathe. "If I could I wouldn't be coughing," says Nathan.

Dr. Ben says he talked to Daniel in isolation and will keep Chloe informed. Justin and Adrienne walk up. Justin goes off to call Bo and tell him about Carly. Clhoe falls apart and Phillip is there to comfort her.

Adrienne asks how Stephanie is doing. Stephanie is a mess, as usual. Somehow she'll work it around to this all being her fault.

Nicole continues to yell. EJ walks up, "Samantha, off all people."

Daniel puts an ice-pack on Nathan's forehead. Nathan calls for his mother, then for Melanie. Daniel says he understands. "No one understands," says Nathan, "I love her." The fever has gone to his brain.

Stephanie says, "When we talked before I was a mean, whiny bitch. I'm still a mean, whiny bitch, but I've calmed down." Adrienne and Stephanie kiss and make up, then look at Phillip and Clhoe across the room doing consolation by cuddle. Stephanie tells Adrienne Parker isn't going to lose his dad.

EJ rants. He asks Nicole to grab Sydney and take her inside. Nicole scoops her up. On the way out, she reaches out and rips Sami's heart out. EJ says if they pull this kind of stuff again the deal is over. He says each year on their birthdays he's going to sit the kids down and show them the video of Sami's confession.

"You'll have to pay us royalties," says Rafe.

Daniel asks Carly how the pain is going. Carly says the pain is doing just fine. Nathan goes into full-blown delirium. Melanie tells Carly she and Daniel did a great thing, "You're really a team."

"So were the 1962 Mets," says Carly.

Nathan runs off the rails, "I should have told you the truth."

"The truth about what," asks Daniel.

Stephanie tells Adrienne Phillip is Parker's father.

Justin returns and tells Chloe and Phillip he couldn't reach Bo. Chloe walks off. Justin asks how Phillip is. "Somewhere between scared to death and halfway crazy," says Phillip, "Melanie has to get through this."

Stephanie tells Adrienne about Chloe and Phillip's romp, and the switcheroo, "Daniel Chloe and Phillip still think the baby is Daniel's, but mom knows the truth." Adrienne thinks Melanie will run to Nathan. "Now they could all die," says Stephanie, "At least that would solve everything."

Nicole tells Sydney there will always be a bond between them. Translation, the bond is doomed. EJ walks in and says Nicole did the right thing calling him. "Did I pass the test," asks Nicole.

Rafe chases Sami down at the pier. He catches her and says he gets why she was at the DiMera mansion, but advises her not to do it again. He says he was there trying to get through to EJ. "You went there and I ruined that, too," says Sami.

"Yep," says Rafe, "Your record of being a complete train wreck is safe."

EJ says the jury is still out on Nicole and Sydney. Nicole asks to tuck Sydney in. EJ OK’s it and sends her upstairs with the baby. Nicole leaves. EJ buries his face in his hands.

Rafe tells Sami she didn't ruin anything. He says they can't give up. Sami says she just couldn't stand being away from her kids, "I can't live with out Johnny and Sydney, and I won't." Hugs.

Phillip tells Clhoe there is no news. Justin tells them to hang in there. Hey, he came up with that and he doesn't even have a medical degree. Phillip says if things go south with Daniel he'll look after her and Parker and help Parker get a good home with a stranger like he did Pocket.

Stephanie wonders what to do if Nathan recovers. Adrienne says, "That is something only you can answer."

Nathan rambles. He fades out and Daniel calls for him. Melanie assures Carly they'll all get better, "I can't lose you. I love you."

"I love you," says Carly. She stops breathing.

Melanie yells, "MOM! MOM!"

"MMMOOOOMMMMMMYYYYY!!!"

Previews
========

EJ tells Stefano, "You're married to a lying, traitorous bitch."

Kate is on the phone, "In short, You're screwed!"

Daniel uses CPR on Carly as the peanut gallery watches.

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A Monster Lurks

We open up in the Patch And Billie Memorial Isolation Ward. Nathan wakes up and tells Melanie she looks good, for being on death's door, that is.

Carly finds Daniel working in the lab. He says he has found the virus strain, but it's not normal. No big deal... in Salem nothing is normal. Anyway, it's a mutation. He holds up a vial and says it's the antiviral, "But we don't have time to test the drug."

Nicole and Brady are in the Kiriakis den. Nicole figures Vivian is free despite what she has done. Brady says he has to go to the hospital since Melanie isn't doing well. Nicole tells him to go and also says they will figure a way to deal with Vivian. Then she stops him, "There is something I have to tell you and you should hear it from me."

Kate comes into the rumpus room and finds EJ and the kids. EJ says he doesn't know whether to thank her or destroy her.

Sami serves a lunch she has prepared. Water and ketchup. Allie asks when Johnny and Sydney will be coming home. "Not yet," says Sami.

"Not yet," repeats Will, "What does that mean?"

What part of 'not yet' confuses you," asks Sami.

Rafe suggests getting Allie to school. He takes her into the other room to get ready. Sami tells Will she had to turn Johnny and Sydney over to EJ.

"EJ got hold of Arianna's camera, didn't he," asks Will.

"No," says Sami, "I just couldn't find another babysitter on short notice."

Brady wonders how EJ got his kids back since he's a proven kidnapper. Well, Sami's attempted murder trumps kidnapping. Nicole says she doesn't want to lie about it, "Apparently Arianna had a recording of Sami confessing she shot EJ. It was with the things she left." Brady says that couldn't be unless it was the camera Rafe asked about. Nicole tells him she found it but didn't want to drop that piece of bad news on him.

"You gave it to EJ," snorts Brady, "That's why he has his kids back."

EJ says he has proof that Sami shot him. Kate fake-gasps. EJ says he confronted her and Sami admitted she came over because Kate called her. Kate denies. EJ goes into a rage. He jams a finger into Kate’s face, "Don't lie to me!" Translation: "Don't talk to me." "You are as responsible as she is," says EJ. Kate thinks the one one responsible for what happened is EJ.

"How are we doing," asks Melanie, "I'd like your opinion as a doctor."

"Let's put it this way," says Nathan, "What you really need is my opinion as a mortician."

Nathan tries to be upbeat and reminds Melanie of all the good things she does. After that two second exchange he tells her to concentrate on the positive things.

Phillip asks Chloe about word on Maggie. Clhoe says she's doing better. She says when she talked to Daniel she thought there was something he didn't want to tell her.

Carly says, "We need a guinea pig to test this on." Dr. Guinea Pig hauls out the oldest trick in the 'Doctor Book' and decides to test the anti-virus on himself.

Brady wants to know what EJ promised Nicole. Nicole says he wasn't specific. Brady reminds her EJ lies all the time and says she's a fool if she believes him. No doubt that means she believes him.

Kate says she has no regrets about doing anything and had no idea Sami was coming over that night. She admits to calling Sami, however. She says she sees EJ the same way Samantha sees him, "Beneath that charming little smile a monster lurks. Think about what happens to people who try to hurt me." She offers him a brownie and then walks off. Sami calls EJ. He tells her they have nothing to say to each other. Sami begs to differ.

Carly begs Daniel not to test the drug on himself. Daniel goes off to talk to people before he does the deed, and thanks Carly for backing him up on it. He leaves and Carly eyes the drug. She goes to the computer and scratches out her last will and testament.

Daniel finds Chloe, Stephanie and Phillip together. He tells them things for Melanie and Nathan might be looking up, "There's a two-for-one sale at the Salem Mortuary." Phillip and Stephanie leave. Daniel looks at Parker. Chloe wonders why he's looking at him like he will never see him again.

"If Phillip gets his hands on them, he gives them all away," says Daniel.

Sami begs EJ to reconsider, for the kids... for the holidays... for the sake of dragging this out into oblivion. EJ refuses and hangs up. Rafe comes back and he and Sami have a hug-a-thon.

Nicole shows up at the DiMera mansion and wants to know if EJ is going to follow through with his promise to let her see Sydney.

Brady wonders if he can see Melanie. Phillip and Stephanie say he needs a pass, "No one can hug or touch her except Nathan, though."

Chloe begs Daniel not to try the anti-virus on himself. Daniel says, "Melanie and Nathan might die. I have to help them."

"My love knows no limits," says Daniel.

"Your intelligence level certainly does," says Chloe.

Johnny greets EJ. Nicole slips through as EJ pays attention to him. He finds her in the rumpus room with Sydney.

Rafe rubs Sami's feet. Coincidentally, Sami reads the Gal Manual, "Caution... no guy just wants to give you a foot rub." Kate shows up and tells Sami EJ will try to ruin her life now that he knows Sami called her. Sami don' care. Kate says she should because she has a plan that could help.

Kate says she can't believe she's there taking Sami's side. Rafe can't believe she interrupted the "foot rub." Kate says she thinks it's wrong to take Sami's children from her. She says Stefano doesn't know about any of this and if she gets her hands on certain documents it could be a game changer. Rafe warns about crossing Stefano, but Kate asks if they can life without Sydney and Johnny. Brady calls Kate. She turns and tells Rafe and Sami she has another fire to go put out, "I think my plan is your only hope."

Carly leaves notes for Bo and Daniel propped up on the computer. She goes over, takes a hypo and contemplates the two anti-virus vials.

Daniel finds Brady, Phillip and Stephanie. He asks to talk to Phillip and they walk off. Father Matt finds Stephanie. He says he had a few minutes with Nathan and Melanie giving them last rights.

Whineanie says there is something she should have told them and semi-blames herself for their bout with Dungcootie Fever. Father Matt asks if that info might have been her way of making amends. Steponme says yes.

Melanie cools Nathan's fevered brow as Carly comes in.

Sami thinks Kate seemed not to be lying. She goes into a funk over the fact that the holidays are coming, but Mr. Reassurance calms her down. Sami goes to lay down for some alone time. "This isn't over," says Rafe. He grabs his coat and leaves.

Nicole, Johnny, EJ and Sydney play. EJ sends Johnny off. He says he knows Nicole is there for selfish reasons, but he's been thinking. STOP THE PRESSES! EJ HAS BEEN THINKING! He says he knows Nicole loves Sydney and tells her to take her to the garden and show her she loves her. "Let's go pull some weeds," says Nicole.

Chloe tells Brady Daniel will test the drug on himself. "If there is to be any testing of drugs around here," says Brady, "I'm your junkie." He asks how Chloe is doing. Chloe says she's an emotional wreck. She's as jittery as a whore in church. Or a whore in a hospital room with her ex-husband and newborn. She assures him she'll be fine. Brady leaves. Chloe picks up Parker. She sits with him and tells him she cheated and lied. She begs God not to punish Daniel for her sins. Then she starts to breast feed Parker.

"Holy cow," says Parker, "No one could be that hungry."

Daniel hustles into the lab all ready to work. She stops cold when he sees Carly's letter, opens it, reads and rushes out.

Brady tells Phillip and Stephanie Daniel developed the Dungcootie Fever drug overnight, and now has to test it on himself.

"Because it's healthier, I'm drinking 2% milk. The rest is 98% alcohol." -Brady Black

Kate walks up and wonders what they do now. Phillip tells her all they can do is wait and hope.

Phillip worries that Daniel is taking a real gamble taking the anti-virus himself, "If he pulls it off everyone will be happy."

"No," says Stephanie, "If it works, Melanie will still be with us and no one will be happy."

Melanie and Nathan freak out that Carly is in with them. Carly assures them everything will be all right.

Nicole and Sydney play in the garden. Nicole says she's happy because she's with her. Sydney says she's happy because EJ said they only have an hour to pull weeds.

EJ comes downstairs and finds Rafe, "What are you doing here?"

Kate tells Brady he can't ignore Vivian. Brady realizes that, and says he knows he will be first on Vivian's to-do list.

Phillip wonders why they wouldn't be happy if Nathan and Melanie make it out of this alive. Stephanie tells him it's because of the truth about Phillip and Parker.

Carly prepares the anti-virus and jams the hypo into her arm as Daniel watches and screams from outside the room, "NOOOOOO!!! That's the evidence from the SPD's last heroin bust!"

Rafe says Mary let him in, "I'm not here for Sami. I'm here for Will and Allie and the kids. You're not what's best for them. I'm hoping we can come to an agreement at least for the holidays."

"No," says EJ, "Never."

Nicole suggests she and Sydney have tea. Sami watches from the bushes and quiversnivels.


Previews
========

Carly tells Daniel, "If I don't get that drug, you know what the outcome is going to be."

Sami says to Nicole, "Get out of my way."

Rafe snorts at EJ, "You SOB!"

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Bupkis

We start out where we left off in the Black Forest with EJ making threats, Sami threatening back and the heart-wrenching Sydnapping II. Sami puts on a brave face as EJ and Nicole wrench her children from her. Once they're gone, it's Niagara Falls from Sami.

The cop gives Brady a pen to sign the statement, but Brady just can't.

Roman comes into the pub and finds Will, Allie and Caroline. He wants to know what Sami has done now. "She got married," says Caroline.

"Which one," asks Roman.

"It's about her twelfth, I think," says Caroline.

Rafe tries to console Sami. He promises they will get the kids back, "We'll have them at the babysitter's in no time."

Bo finds Carly at the hospital. He asks about the Dungcootie Fever situation. Carly says Melanie and Nathan need an antiviral. "I've got one on my computer," says Bo.

Back in quarantine, Melanie and Nathan comfort each other. Sort of. "You're a jerk," says Melanie.

"Funny," says Nathan, "I feel the same way about you." Well, we're ALL in agreement.

Maxine finds Daniel, who says he might be making a little progress, "I think I have an idea... If only I had a clue."

Dr. Bo reassures Carly that Melanie will make it. Daniel rushes up and tells her they have work to do.

Nathan and Melanie discuss this "jerk" situation. Melanie thinks Nathan should have come to her when he found out Chloe was sleeping around. Nathan says if they had been together he would have.

Victor is with Detective Hansen, Brady and Vivian. He strong-arms him into leaving so Victor can have a word with "his family." The detective leaves and Vivian says there will be consequences if Brady signs the statement, "If I go down, I take every one of you with me."

"Well, you certainly haven't been going down since you married me," says Victor.

Daniel and Carly do research. Daniel thinks they can manufacture the anti-Dungcootie Fever protein right there in the hospital, "Get my Betty Crocker Cookbook."

Nathan thinks they should resolve things since they might not have much time left. If only... Melanie knows he wouldn't intentionally hurt her, BUT...

Sami and Rafe are outside the pub. Sami just can't go inside and face her family. Rafe promises they will be happy again. Childless, but happy.

Nicole and EJ get back to the DiMera mansion. Mary announces the kids room is ready. Nicole is reluctant to give up Sydney.

Roman tells Caroline he thinks he should have been at the wedding, "Giving Sami away forever would be a pleasure any father would want." Sami comes in and announces EJ has the kids.

"I wondered why you didn't ask me to babysit tonight," says Caroline.

Victor tells Vivian no one will ever believe her. Vivian says Maggie already does. "I'm holding all the cards and you have bupkis," says Vivian. Brady says they don't have much of a choice.

Nathan wakes up from a bad dream. Then he sees Melanie and wishes he was still dreaming. Melanie brings up the letter she wrote on her wedding day. Nathan thinks they may not make it out of this. "There is something I didn't tell you," says Melanie, "I heard you... talking in your sleep. You said 'I love you, Melanie.'"

"That's because I do love you." Man, the fever must be making him delirious.

EJ tells Nicole it's not up to Nicole to decide to keep holding Sydney, but he allows her to get Sydney ready for bed. He sends Mary up to get Johnny ready, then tells Nicole, "It's just like old times, isn't it. I swear I can smell foam rubber." He goes into the rumpus room, pours a drink and toasts, "To Samantha and the wedding you will never forget." OMG, after so many, how can she possibly choose which one that would be?

Sami weaves a tale for the people in the pub and tells them they thought it would be nice for Johnny and Allie to spend time with EJ. Will takes Allie away. Roman wants to hear that drivel again. Sami asks him to trust her, and then leaves. Rafe follows, grabs and hugs. Sami asks him to tell Roman to give her a break. I think the break Roman has in mind is her neck. Rafe goes back to the table as Roman rants. Rafe says he and Sami are doing what they think is best for the children. "Sami did it, didn't she," asks Roman, "And EJ can prove it, can't he?"

Daniel says they have to insert and synthesize the gene. Sounds good, doesn't it.

"Insert it into what and synthesize it how," asks Carly.

"Don't get hung up in the details," says Daniel.

Melanie backtracks and says she loves Phillip, not Nathan. Nathan says he loves Stephanie. Melanie don' wanna be like Chloe. Ho's of a feather flock together.

Sami comes back and asks Roman to trust her. Caroline backs her up, "Some things are best left unspoken."

"Like this entire script," says Roman. But he agrees and wishes Sami and Rafe the best, "I am on your side for all the Days Of Our Lives." They bring on the champagne. Roman toasts, "To Rafe and Sami, the damnedest couple I ever did see."

An Ejami in the audience shouts, "They're damned, all right!"

Victor and Brady argue. Brady says he got Victor into this and will get him out of it. Victor doesn't want Vivian going after Maggie again. Vivian says she has bigger fish to fry. Hansen comes back in and says Bo is on his way there right now. Brady hands Hansen a new statement. Victor asks him to shred the other copy and hands him a wad-o-cash as well as offering him the use of his yacht. Hansen gladly takes the "tip." he leaves and Vivian congratulates him on his maneuver.

Bo walks in and asks what rock Vivian crawled out from under. "Ask your father," says Vivian.

Carly finds Maxine and asks for the latest on Melanie and Nathan. Maxine updates her and Carly rushes into their room as Maxine cautions her not to do that.

Melanie and Nathan decide they're friends. They deserve each other. "My head feels like it's going to explode," says Melanie.

"Vacuums can't explode," says Nathan. He crawls into bed with her.

Rafe and Sami have Allie sleeping in the back room. Rafe sits on the couch with Sami. She talks about the number of times Roman has had to clean up her messes, "What have I done to my family?"

"It's only an hour show," says Rafe, "We don't have enough time to get into that."

Nicole and EJ are in the rumpus room talking about the evening's adventure. She tries to convince him he can't have his children home and happy alone. She tells him the kids are there because of her and he has to change the way he treats her.

Changed EJ takes her drink, pours it into his and, bottoms up.

Nathan and Melanie cuddle as Carly looks in. She knocks. Nathan slowly gets up and limps over to the door. Carly asks, "How are you?"

"You mean besides dying of Dungcootie Fever," asks Nathan. Melanie wakes.

Gabi and Will deal with the aftermath in the pub. Gabi says she thinks EJ was holding something Arianna had over Sami's head and that's now he got the kids.

EJ is cordial. He tells Nicole he's in a good mood. Nicole thinks that's because he got what he wanted, "And I can make sure you keep it."

Rafe pulls Sami in and tells her after everything that's happened, he's happy they're married. "It hasn't sunk in," says Sami.

"It will in 20-30 years," says Rafe.

"Twenty to thirty years," repeats Sami, "That's a long time."

i>"You're right. It's almost a decade," says Rafe. Allie calls and says she can't sleep. Sami says she thinks Allie misses Johnny and Sydney.

Bo reads the statement and says it's hard to swallow. "It's not a donut," says Victor. Bo says he'll talk to Maggie and sends Brady and Victor packing. He detains Vivian and asks why she came back. Vivian says Salem is her home. Bo says he'll be watching her.

Sami sleeps on the couch with Allie. Rafe picks Allie up and carries her into the back room, "You're not getting in the way of my action tonight, kid."

Gabi tells Will they're family now, "If you ever want to talk, I am (say it with her) here for you."

Rafe tucks Allie in and then joins Sami in bed. They cuddle.

Nicole suggests EJ get up to read Johnny his bedtime story soon, "I'm off."

"I know," says EJ, "But are you leaving?"

As she leaves, Nicole asks when she gets to see Sydney again. EJ says she can stop by tomorrow. "I'll see you in the morning," says Nicole. EJ rolls his eyes.

Bo calls for Hansen. Hansen comes in and Bo says Brady's statement is five sentences long and it looks like it was written in a hurry. Bo thinks there was an original statement that Brady "updated." Hansen says Brady wrote the first statement when he was upset. Bo wants to see the statement. Hansen says it no longer exists. Bo growls, "Consider what you have in your pocket your severance," He wads up and tosses the bogus statement as Hansen walks out, contemplating his upcoming Greek adventure.

Victor and Brady are back at the Kiriakis mansion. Brady says he couldn't let Victor and Nicole pay for what he started and he hopes things work out with Victor and Maggie.

Vivian is on the phone with Gus making threats to the people who sarcophagized her.

Daniel works and claims to be on the right track to finding the long-anticipated Dungcootie Fever cure.

Carly tells Nathan and Melanie not to give up. Melanie blows her a kiss.

This episode, on the other hand, merely blows...

Previews
========

Nicole tells Brady, "There is something I have to tell you and you should hear it from me."

EJ yells at Kate, "Don't lie to me."

Daniel tells Chloe, "Melanie and Nathan are going to die if I don't help them."

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Happy Thanksgiving

Husband Du Jour

We open today's adventure at the sarcophagus. Take a good look at it... this story is coming to an end and it may be the last chance you get to see this well-warn prop. And be thankful you don't have smellevision. Victor caresses Maggie's cheek and pours his heart out to her, telling her she'll be fine. Maggie whispers, "Victor, I thought I heard you say..."

Victor interrupts, "I love you... you did. And I do... advice from the Guy Manual be damned."

Maggie swoons again. Victor screams, Maggie! Maggie... no!" Vivian cackles like the Wicked Witch of the West. Apologies to the Wicked Witch of the West for the comparison.

Hope is in the infirmary. Leigh comes in and introduces Pam, who has a cut tendon and needs surgery. She had a disagreement in the kitchen, "I told her this ain't Top Chef." Hope determines Pam has no family outside and tells her that might be a problem, "Do not sign the consent form. If you stay here, you're risking your life,"

"I know," says Pam, "I've seen the food in the kitchen. It comes from a place called the Brady Pub."

Sami and Rafe do the "with this ring, I thee wed" part and instead of wrapping up this odyssey of a wedding, Rafe says he has a present for her.

We revisit the same rage-filled display we saw from EJ yesterday. He finds out about the wedding and smashes a glass against the wall, "SON OF A B*ITCH!" Yes, I think he got the "B-Word" out. Nicole tells him to calm down and reminds him he has won. "You're right. She won't see her children again," says EJ, "I'll make sure of that."

Victor encourages Maggie not to give up. Brady goes to call 911. Fortunately he has it on speed dial.

Rafe has given Sami a Christmas tree ornament. Well, there won't be a virgin birth in this union, so they might as well celebrate another one.

A dark figure stalks and watches from the woods.

Pam nearly panics. Leigh watches and Hope backpedals and tells Pam to do as she said. Pam goes to Leigh and insists they go to Salem Hospital. The warden walks in and Leigh tells her what's going on. The warden tells her about the outbreak of Dungcootie Fever. Hope asks who is infected and the warden just happens to know. She tells her it's Nathan and Melanie. Hope says, "Nathan is my cousin."

"Was your cousin," says the warden.

They arrest Vivian, who says she won't talk until she sees her lawyer. "Thank the dear Lord," says the cop. They wheel Maggie out.

The minister starts the "cord ceremony." Carolyn reads from Ecclesiastes about the meaning of three cords. The whole family weaves a cord. A distraught viewer who can't believe how long this is dragging on grabs it and tries to hang herself with it. The mysterious figure continues to watch.

Nicole assures EJ Sami's marriages never last more than six months. EJ says he hopes this one sicks so she has to spend her life with "that idiot." Nicole offers to do anything for the kids. EJ says there is something she can do.

Jennifer is at the hospital. She apologizes to Dr. Walters as they wheel Maggie in. Jennifer says she will be right with her all the way. They wheel Maggie off. Jen stays. So much for her being with Maggie all the way.

Brady is in with Vivian and a cop telling the story. Vivian rolls her eyes. The cop says, "This is the craziest story I've ever heard."

"You don't watch DOOL, do you," asks Brady.

The minister gives an endless prayer to top off the endless wedding, and then finally ends things and pronounces them husband and wife. "Well, Mrs. Hernandez, how does it feel," asks Rafe.

"Like anything is possible," says Sami. They see a shooting star. With any luck it's an asteroid that's about to hit and put us all out of our misery.

The warden returns and tells Hope Nathan and Melanie are in quarantine. It's all toucyh-feely lovey-dovey between Hope and the warden at the moment.

The cop gets a call and leaves. Brady stares daggers as Vivian launches her wrath on him. Brady backs her off and warns her that he will protect Victor. He tells her to back off, "Do you hear what I'm saying to you, old woman?"

Vivian says, "I'm sorry but if this old woman is taking a rap, everyone's going down with me!"

Victor tells Jen there has been an incident, but is vague about the details. Ben comes back and says Maggie is doing well. Jennifer goes in to see her.

Back in the woods, we all bask in the beauty of the never-ending ceremony. The guests head for the pub as Sami tries to be hopeful. She rambles on as EJ and Nicole approach, EJ is ominous, "Your time is up, Rafe."

Brady and Vivian keep it up. Brady says he'll own up to everything, but doesn't want her implicating Victor or Phillip. Vivian says all she wants is revenge, "I could put that aside under the proper circumstances, however."

Victor comes in to see Maggie. Mags says she didn't think she would make it, "I have to ask... is it true that you put Vivian in the sarcophagus?"

Hope does paperwork as Pam rests behind her. She notices Pam is to be cremated, "We have to get you out of here."

Sami suggests Rafe hold the kids along with Nicole while she talks with EJ. EJ says his people watch her all the time, "I have some very nice videos taken through your bedroom window, in fact." She begs for more time, but cold-hearted EJ denies the request.

Victor tells Maggie the sarcophagus was all Vivian's doing. Maggie asks about Victor's role in all this. He admits he had a role in it and Maggie lectures. Victor insists he was just giving Vivian a taste of her own medicine. "You should have gone to the authorities," Says Maggie.

"That would have been the intelligent thing to do," says Victor. Maggie says what he did scares her to death.

Hope tires to wake Pam. No can do. She looks at her file and finds out she's been sedated. Hope then takes a paper clip and gets into the oh-so-secure file and digs out a cell phone.

EJ and Sami argue about all the baggage we all already know about. Sami compares her mothering skills favorably to Nicole's. He reminds Sami a child never died on Nicole's watch. THAT DOES IT! Sami 'splodes, "You bastard!"

EJ accuses her of never putting her children first, "So I'm taking my children away from the narcissistic, promiscuous, irresponsible mother."

Vivian wants to make a deal: in exchange for her silence, all the charges against her will be dropped, "It's Maggie's word against mine. Due to the fumes for all she knows she was kidnapped by Liza Minnelli." She tells Brady he can still be a hero by taking her offer. Brady can't guarantee Victor will buy it.

Victor doesn't apologize, but he sure can rationalize, "I meant what I said when I said it."

"About loving me," asks Maggie.

"No," says Victor, "About how bad the sarcophagus smelled when I opened it."

The warden walks in and finds Hope on the cell phone. She grabs it from her.

EJ says, "If you don't accept my deal you, Will and your husband-du-jour will go to prison." Rafe asks for the original deal... having the kids for a few more hours and then turning them over.

"I taught advanced algebra from the ages of 25 - 30, then was fired for no apparent reason. What a waste of 7 years" -Rafe Hernandez

EJ grabs Johnny and tells him he and Sydney will be living with him. Johnny don' wanna.

EJ lays a sales pitch on reluctant Johnny, "We will be together for all the Days Of Our Lives." He picks up Johnny and has Nicole grab Sydney. Sami refuses. Sami begs. Sami rips her heart out and gives Nicole that instead.

The cop comes back with typed statements. Brady reads and refuses to sign.

Maggie asks Victor to go. Victor gets up and shuffles out with his tail between his legs. Maggie bawls.

Jennifer yells for Hope. The warden asks what Hope was doing. She says she called about her cousin. The warden says she broke the rules. Hope promises it won't happen again. The warden revokes all of Hope's privileges and tosses her in solitary.

Sami blubbers. Nicole reminds her she gave her a chance. EJ presses and threatens. Sami sobs and hands Sydney over. Nicole takes her as Sami falls into Rafe's arms.

EJ tells Johnny his mom is crying because she is so happy that she married Rafe, "He means more to her than anything." Sami says it's not true, but tells Johnny they're going to have a grownup party at the pub. In spite of the fact it's only for grownups, Rafe and her are going. Johnny agrees to go to EJ's house to avoid the party. Heartless EJ yanks him away from Sami, who manages a smile as they walk off.

Sami collapses into a heap o' tears. Then, suddenly, she reconsiders the situation, "Actually, this isn't so bad. Who would have thought we'd be able to get a babysitter for our wedding night on such short notice?"


Previews
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Carly tells Bo, "If this virus spreads, it could be a disaster."

Rafe tells Sami, "He's not gettin' away with this."

EJ toasts, "To Samantha and the wedding you will never forget."

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A Coupon-Cutting Suburban Siren

Maggie sarcophagizes. She sees well-done, barbequed, smokin' Victor lying on the floor and he sees Vivian towering over him.

Doug and Julie are at the prison all bouncy and happy to see Hope. They're also wearing matching outfits. Hope asks if they've talked to Bo. Julie misinterprets and wants to know what's up with scumbag Bo.

Nicole and EJ are still by the pier. Nicole asks him to let her in Sydney's life. "If I didn't let Samantha in, why would I do that for you," asks EJ.

"For one thing," says Nicole, "I didn't shoot you in the head."

"And Samantha didn't fake a pregnancy," says EJ.

Sami and Rafe stand amidst flowers, lights and a few sneezing guests who are allergic to tons of flowers. The virgin bride walks down the aisle. So does Sami.

The ceremony begins. Blitherin' bawlin' Sami breaks down. The twelfth wedding really gets to you.

Hope asks about Doug and Julie's outfits and they announce they are going steady. She says Bo has been coming so much they've restricted his visits. She also tells them not to worry about her. Julie says they have to since the holidays are coming. She removes her foot from her mouth and apologizes.

EJ and Nicole continue to go through the "why did Nicole go to Sami and EJ first" routine. Nicole continues to ask EJ to do what is best for Sydney. EJ promises he will, and walks off.

Sami blubbers away. Rafe tells her she's making him the happiest man on earth by wearing a dress that's so low cut. Sami continues to worry, "What if I go to prison? It would take a miracle to get me out of this."

Sami finally straightens up and decides whatever she has to face, she wants to face as Rafe's wife.

Vivian taunts Victor Skewerakis. "The last wish of a dying man," begs Victor, "Shut up."

"You were enticed by a coupon-cutting suburban siren," says Vivian.

Sami rejpairs he mascara-streaked face, does the bipolar bossa-nova and decides this is the happiest day of her life.

EJ and Nicole get back to the DiMera mansion. Different setting... same conversation. EJ tells her to leave and hustles into the rumpus room. Nicole follows. She says he walks away when he knows he's wrong and hates admitting it. EJ tells her what she is doing doesn't serve her purpose. She reminds him when she was really pregnant they each loved the child and each other.


Finally, the wedding ceremony starts. The minister says, "Although we are not in a traditional church, we are still in the presence of God, and these infernal allergy-inflaming flowers He created."

EJ tells Nicole his entire life has been a lie. Nicole tells him he has been emotional, irrational and stupid. "What is stupid," says EJ, "is talking to me like that when you want something."

"What is stupid," says Nicole, "is talking to you, period." She says EJ needs her for balance. "Nobody will ever need you in their life for balance," says EJ. Nicole contends he knows she is right.

Hope says Bo will be bringing Ciara to see her on Thanksgiving. The Bobbsey Twins say they will be there, too.

The warden joins Leigh in the infirmary. Leigh tells her Hope has visitors. The warden says that's OK as long as the visitor isn't Bo, "For now, we're stuck with Hope... unless she steps out of line and then I can do what I want with her."

Vivian raises a knife and Maggie screams for Victor to watch out.

Brady rushes in and saves Victor. Inside the sarcophagus, Maggie swoons.

Here's a switch, Nicole thinks EJ is wrong and EJ thinks he isn't. EJ tells her to get out again. "I've been barking up the wrong tree," says Nicole, "You're not afraid of me being part of Sydney's life... you're afraid of me being part of yours."

Rafe recites vows he has written all on his own, "Pi r squared... but your boobs certainly aren't."

Victor slowly lifts the lid and sees unconscious Maggie.

Julie says, "Hope, we are (say it with her) here for you." Doug thinks there is something Hope isn't telling her. The guard announces she's leaving.

"Thanks, Mimi," says Doug. The pair explains they have bribed Mimi to give them some private time. Family hug.

Sami has written her vows, too. She says Rafe is her Hero. Translation: Rhymes with zero. "You will always (say it with her) be there for me. That's you. Remember when I made you feel my stomach when Sydney was kicking, and you missed the target and felt a lot higher? That's when I started falling in love with you. I am so lucky your heart chose all my personalities to fall in love with. No matter what happens I couldn't get through it without you."

Victor shakes Maggie as Vivian insists Maggie is dead. Victor finds a pulse, and then tries finding one on Maggie.

Mimi takes Hope back to the infirmary. Hope sees Leigh and remembers talking to the warden about her. Leigh snaps Hope out of her funk and asks how things went. Hope says she's trying to figure how to make Thanksgiving bearable this year. She asks if Leigh's family visits. Leigh says they live too far away, and wants to know why Hope is so interested in them.

EJ says Nicole is delusional. Nicole thinks all the feelings from when they were married... and the scent of foam rubber... will come back for EJ. She insists she didn't make a fool of him back when she made a fool of him. "I know you love Johnny and Sydney, but that's only a part of your happiness. If you go on like this you'll end up lonely and sad."

"And if you go on like this you'll end up sitting on your arse outside," says EJ.

The minister says, "I will now read a passage from the Bible."

"From the what," asks Sami.

Hope backs off and says she was out of line asking about Leigh's family. Leigh says she doesn't think Hope was being nosy, "But in prison, don't get too close to anyone. We only get one shower a week."

Victor apologizes for taking so long to get to Maggie. He tells her he loves her. Maggie conks out again. Vivian cackles with laughter.

The minister says, "Please face each other and take each other's hands... I said her HANDS, Mr. Hernandez..."

Nicole thinks EJ can't trust himself around her, "Don't worry, your virtue is safe around me."

"It's been so long since I got any, I think I got my virtue back," says EJ, "but I don't' want to talk about this."

"OK," says Nicole, "Kick me out, but you will think about what I said whether you want to or not."

"Keep telling yourself that," says EJ. He gets a call, "What about Samantha?" He gasps... "They're doing what?"

Rafe and Sami say, "I do."

EJ hangs up the phone and throws a glass across the room, "DAMN THAT WOMAN! That glass she just made me ruin was part of my best set of crystal."


Previews
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Brady asks, "Do you hear what I'm saying to you, old woman?" Vivian says, "I'm sorry but if this old woman is taking a rap, everyone's going down with me!"

Hope says, "You're not getting away with this, Leigh."

Sami wrestles with EJ, "You bastard!"

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A Tailspin

We are back at the Hernandez Hovel, a.k.a. Sami's Slobberhaus or the Brady Bawlatorium and Sami is... blubbering that she and Rafe can't get married today. Rafe assures her they can. I remain confused, having read the Guy Manual cover to cover, and I'm sure it says conversations like this usually are the other way around, with the guy insisting they can't get married. I'll have to check that section again.

Victor is in the Kiriakis den wondering what Vivian has done to Maggie, "She couldn't have... yes, she could've."

Inside the sarcophagus, Maggie calls for Victor.

Chad paces in the rumpus room and picks up a knife/letter-opener. Stefano comes in and Chad stashes the shiv.

Nicole and EJ are at the pier. Nicole wonders if she should have trusted EJ. She asks if she will have a place in Sydney's life. EJ asks why she tired to make a deal with Samantha.

Sami continues to fall apart and asks if Rafe has a plan. Plans are for wimps... so Rafe has a plan.

Victor calls for Vivian over the bluetooth. She lounges with her facial mudpack on as Victor says he's thinking of letting her out. Vivian bolts upright.

Pollyanna Sami just knows Rafe has a plan. He tells her it won't solve all of their problems. In fact, Rafe's plans usually don't solve any problems.

Kate excuses herself to check on Melanie at the hospital. Chad tells Stefano if the job is still open he'd like it. Stefano agrees, "You start Monday and I'll teach you how to be more decisive." Chad pulls the knife and Stefano cells him to get rid of it. Chad says they have something to settle between them.

EJ rages at Nicole for going to Sami first. Nicole makes excuses and reminds him Sami hates him more than she hates her, "I mean, she shot you." She assures EJ she was going to include him in visitation arrangements she made with Sami.

EJ isn't sympathetic. He also brings up the fact that Rafe got the last taped confession — the one of him confessing about the Sydnapping. He figures Nicole was going to give the camera to Nicole, "You give me one reason why I shouldn't throw you in this river right now."

Rafe sits Sami on the couch and talks to her like she's a junior high school kid. Sami is flattered he's treating her at that high of a mental level. He says he wants to be in this together with her, "Plus, you have other problems besides EJ."

Victor wonders why Vivian is silent. Vivian breathes into a paper bag and suggests he just leave her where she is. Then she threatens to go to the police. Victor gets it and heads for the mausoleum. Vivian calls Gus and tells him Victor is getting suspicious.

Nicole calms EJ down and says she went to Sami first because she thought it would be better for Sydney. EJ ramps the rage back up and Nicole assures him as soon as she got a foot in the door she was going straight back to EJ. She admits going to Sami first was wrong, "I don't know what you saw in her."

"A couple things," says EJ, "Big things."

Rafe says Bo said he's going to arrest Sami if he has to. Sami says if she's going to prison there is no way she's handing EJ her kids, "He'd be more expensive than most other babysitters."

Victor enters the mausoleum. Maggie watches as he fiddles around the sarcophagus. He pulls on the lever to open it.

Kate comes back into the rumpus room and gasps when she sees the knife. Chad says he doesn't want to kill Stefano, "I just want some blood."

"Why?"

"Vampires are all the rage right now," says Chad.

Rafe says the cops only have circumstantial evidence on Sami. He reminds her if she marries him, they can't make him testify against her. So much for true love. Sami says she isn’t sure she should get out of this, "I'm tired of running scared and asking you and Will to cover for me."

"I cover for you because I love you," says Rafe, "And because I get some occasionally." He moves in and tries to make this one of those occasions. He says they will be strong and beat EJ, "So take my hand and say you will be mine and we will go through this together." Sami hugs and says yes, "Marrying you is the wedding of my dreams... anytime... anyplace..."

"I want to spend all the Days Of Our Lives making you happy," says Rafe.

Stefano wants an explanation. Chad tells him about the birth certificate. Stefano says any two-bit con man can create a fake birth certificate. He orders Chad to leave, but Chad refuses. He insists he isn't trying to scam him and pulls out the certificate. Stefano looks at it and says it's a really good forgery. Chad asks if Stefano had an affair with Madeline. "No," says Stefano, "It's not an affair when you pay."

Nicole says she was desperate to replace the baby she lost and then found out about Sami's pregnancy, "I risked everything. And I know Sydney belongs with you."

Sami decides they should celebrate tonight and worry about other things tomorrow, "We will have a wonderful wedding and all be together." Rafe is on board with that. He leaves to set things up. The upcoming Royal Wedding won't be able to hold a candle to this extravaganza.

Victor continues to pry at the sarcophagus. Gus comes up behind him, "Say goodnight, Victor."

Victor turns around, "Goodnight, Victor." Gus jams a taser in Victor's back. "Don't tase me, bro," begs Victor.

"I'm not going to tase you," says Gus, "I'm from the TSA."

"OMG," says Victor, "Don't touch my junk!"

"Then I have to tase you," says Gus.

ZAP!

Kate suggests both Stefano and Chad get tested.

Sami announces to her kids that she and Rafe are getting married tonight. Johnny asks if he can call Rafe daddy. "In your case," says Sami, " and in fact for all my kids, we're not sure which one you should call daddy." She says anything else they have to talk about can wait until tomorrow. Family hug.

Kate, Stefano and Chad are at the hospital. They walk past the Hazmat guys and discuss the outbreak of Guatemala Fever. Stefano goes over to speak to the nurse about a DNA test. She tells him the lab is closed, and a doctor has to order the test. Stefano pulls out a wad-o-cash and suggests the nurse can draw blood herself. The nurse grabs the cash and a hypo. She hauls Chad off.

Nicole says, "My life went into a tailspin when you and I broke up. Then I saw Sydney again and all those memories came back, along with the scent of foam rubber. And you will get her back. I am not threatening you, but I am asking... will you let me be a part of her life?"

Rafe is at the pub. He tells Gabi to put on a nice dress for his wedding. The Gabster reminds him they just buried Arianna. "Well, I'm not inviting her," says Rafe. He says what happened to Arianna was not Sami's fault. Rafe pours it on, "Life is too short... I love Sami... and I might not get any tonight if we're not married. It would mean the world to me if you are there."

Caroline shows up at the Hernandez Hovel. She's all happy-happy about the wedding. She gives Sami bric-a-brac for the ceremony, as well as a boatload of platitudes.

Maggie sees Victor lying on the floor. Tased and well-done. Victor sees Vivian walk in, "I'm alive and kicking, Victor."

Nicole plays the Sydney card, "Think about her... I may be the only mother she has for a while... do it for Sydney."

We're either in a flower shop or at the wedding. Sami hands Sydney off to Will as the minister steps up. "So," asks Rafe, "Are you ready to get married?"

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Bat-Wing Crazy

We're at the Hernandez Hovel and it's a High-Noon standoff between Sami and EJ. EJ decides they will make a deal where he gets everything and she gets zippo. He'll let bygones be bygones in return for the kids.

Brady lies passed out in a chair as he hears Vivian begging him. Isabella shows up and tells him Vivian needs him to set her free.

Vivian toasts Gus for helping her. Gus thinks she needs to think of one thing — Victor. "Don't be Debbie Downer on me," says Vivian. She calls Maggie to check in on her. Maggie begs her to let her out.

Rafe calls Sami and tells her not to give up as Nicole listens. Nicole walks up and asks him, "Will you still love her when she's convicted of attempted murder?"

Sami says she doesn't have a choice, "We can split time with the kids." Not so fast oh-woman-of-multiple-personalities-not-to-mention-multiple-babysitters... EJ wants full custody.

Rafe tells Nicole to vamoose. Name calling ensues and, wonder of wonders, Nicole can see he's annoyed for what she did with the camera. Nicole figures Rafe wasn't going to let her get close to Sydney. Rafe figures Sydney isn't Nicole's kid. Nicole rages and says Sami is finally getting what she deserves.

EJ spells things out slowly, "You don't ever get to see Johnny or Sydney. Ever. You are dead to them. Dead. Got me?"

Clhoe sits with Parker and talks baby talk. Victor joins her because he's anxious to see his godson's child /grandchild.

Maggie begs for water. Vivian taunts and says she can't come in with it because Victor has posted a guard in front of the mausoleum, "Eventually you will die, but you will be joining Mickey."

"But I don't want to go to hell," wails Maggie.

Izzy tells Brady when he makes someone suffer he only punishes himself. She has a few other choice clichés in her bag of tricks, too.

Sami can't believe EJ would have her abandon her children. She does that without his help. EJ threatens to go to the cops. Sami threatens to play the CD of him admitting to kidnapping Sydney. It's the battle of the incriminating recordings, "You send me to hell and you are coming with me, EJ." I suspect eventually they'll be meeting there anyway.

Phillip comes in and they update Victor on Nathan and Melanie's situation. He says they have tried to contact Maggie but no one knows where she is.

Vivian continues to taunt Maggie. Maggie plays the "you're also punishing my family by killing me" card.

Rafe goes berserk and blames Nicole for everything that's happening. Nicole says he and Sami should have known if they didn't take the deal Nicole would have to take the information to EJ.

EJ reminds Sami the recording of him confessing was taped illegally. Sami starts name-calling. EJ reminds her she shot him and says he thinks he's being generous with his offer. He says if she doesn't accept she'll go to prison and her kids will find out what she did, "So go ahead... call Daddy. Call Uncle Bo. It's your move." Go ahead, Sami. If anything will get you off the hook, it's involving the SPD.

Vivian tells Maggie she hasn't been thinking of how this would affect Maggie's family. She lectures Maggie for going after Victor, but Maggie insists she didn't do that, "Your marriage was..."

"A joke?"

"There is nothing in your heart but hatred and anger," says Maggie, "I feel sorry for you." Vivian doesn't feel sorry for Maggie. She cuts her off.

Kate arrives at the Kiriakis mansion. Brady tells her he's letting Vivian out.

Nicole gets macho with Rafe, "I'm not afraid of you."

"You can't stand to see Sami happy."

"She has four kids, two different fathers," says Nicole, "She makes me look like Mary Poppins. And she tried to kill the father of two of those kids. "

Rafe reminds Nicole she wants what Sami has — children. He taunts and says Sydney knows who her mother is, or at least could pick her out of a lineup with all the babysitters, "It sure as hell ain't you."

The threats continue to fly at the Hernandez Hovel and Sami says she'll never give up her kids. EJ says she could also lose Will or Rafe, "You admitted they knew and helped you cover it up. They are as guilty as you are. You would selfishly serve up the ones you love to further your own agenda."

Kate can't believe Brady is going to free Vivian. He tells her they have sunk to Vivian's level. Kate ain' happy, "You open that Pandora's Box and she will come after everyone we love."

Victor thinks Maggie's absence has gone on too long, "It's like she turned into Mickey." Phillip leaves. Victor puts on the bluetooth and calls Vivian. Vivian answers. She huffs and puffs and tells him she's becoming more deranged. "You were bat-wing crazy to begin with, " says Victor. He tells her this is all her fault.

Nicole says she was the first person to hold Sydney and to cherish and love her. Rafe reminds her she created the hell Sydney went through. Rafe realizes Nicole has given EJ everything with no guarantees, "Get real. EJ won't let you near his little girl. So basically your reward is you never get to see Sydney again. Genius."

We're back to playing 'Deal Or No Deal' at the Hernandez Hovel. Sami says people will be able to figure out EJ is blackmailing her. He orders her to come up with some excuse as to why she would give him her children, "Either accept the terms, or you, Will and Rafe go to prison."

"If I go to prison you will too," says Sami.

"Maybe... maybe not. But Johnny, Sydney and Allie will be the ones to get hurt," says EJ.

Kate tells Brady he's not thinking clearly. Brady's heard that before. He tells Kate he has to go check on Melanie. Kate hasn't heard about the Guatemala Fever outbreak. Brady fills her in and leaves.

Victor can't believe Vivian is actually taking responsibility. Vivian says what she is guilty of is trying to make their marriage work. He tells her he's going to an Italian restaurant tonight while she's locked up. "Poor me," says Vivian. Victor wonders why she sounds so cocky.

Sami says EJ has a right to get revenge against her but begs him not to involve the children. She pours it on thick, "After everything we have been through I know what you are capable of but I know you want your kids to be happy. Please don't do this to them.

Brady finds Victor and asks about Melanie and Nathan. Victor dunno. Victor says Maggie's email didn't say much about where she was going. Brady says he didn't realize Maggie sent an email. He runs off to check on Melanie.

Chad shows up at the DiMera mansion. Kate invites him in. Chad says he's there to see Stefano. Kate figures Chad is going to tell him about the birth certificate. Chad is noncommittal.

Brady is with Chloe. "We can't give up hope," says Chloe.

"Why not," asks Brady, "Bo did."

Phillip walks in and says he can't imagine life without Melanie, "But I'd sure like to give it a try."

Sami begs. EJ softens. Then he looks at the picture of Sami and Rafe, "You have 24 hours to tell everyone why you will never be seen with your children again." He tells her he's having her watched so she can't run, and then he leaves. Sami bawls. Outside, EJ leans against the door and sighs.

Chad asks Kate to get Stefano. Surprisingly, Kate goes to get him. Chad stands there and contemplates a knife.

Victor orders his men to find Maggie. Then he remembers Vivian telling him not to open the sarcophagus, and his recent conversation with her, "Could it be?"

Maggie cries for help.

Victor gasps, "Maggie?"

Nicole is on the phone saying she won't go to the hospital because of the virus, "I know you're my boss but I'm not going to be a victim of this, so fire me but bye-bye." EJ shows up and and Nicole asks what happened with Sami. EJ says Sami agreed to give him custody. "What does that mean for me," asks Nicole, "I trusted you... So will I get to be a part of Sydney's life or not?"

Sami staggers around the Hernandez Hovel crying like a little girl. Sorry for the redundancy. Rafe comes in. She rushes him and blubbers about what happened with EJ. Rafe tells her it's not over, "First things first... let's get married. In fact, let's speed things up and have the wedding night before we get married."

Previews
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Stefano tells Chad, "If I were you, I would lose that knife, son."

EJ screams at Nicole, "You give me one reason why I shouldn't throw you in this river right now."

Sami says, "Rafe, it would take a miracle to get me out of this!"

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Who's Matt?

Bo stands in the front room of the Hernandez Hovel with Rafe, Sami, EJ, Johnny and Allie. The kids get the impression they don't belong there, so they go elsewhere in search of adult supervision. As they leave, the total IQ in the room takes a precipitous drop. Crack investigative officer Bo asks his usual penetrating question, "What's going on?" EJ encourages Sami to fill Bo in. The dead silence he's met with is unusual only by the fact that Sami is in the room. Sami and silence are like oil and water. Seeing as how Sami isn't in the mood for conversation, EJ steps up to the plate and volunteers to tell Bo everything. What a guy!

Phillip comes into Chloe's room as she checks on the Parkster. Phillip has a big wrapped box. He admires the baby and Chloe opens the present. It's some kind of clothing or something. The kid doesn't care since it's not a toy. Chloe gushes over how things have turned out.

Stephanie notices Nathan has a fever. Nathan denies, then falls face-first in his tomato soup. Stephanie tells him what Caroline did is really bad.

Melanie gets woozy. Daniel has her sit down.

Ben and Carly look at the Rodriguez case. Ben notices the doctor was Nathan and the nurse was Melanie.

Bo clams EJ up because EJ might have some real information for him, . He asks EJ to leave. EJ pulls out the video camera and offers to show something interesting to Bo. Bo says he's in violation of his restraining order and orders him to leave. Smarty-mouth EJ sasses the big commish. Bo takes him aside and makes threats, "Show me whats on that camera later. Get your ass out of here now or get dragged out in handcuffs." EJ gets his ass out. Ejamis watch his ass go.

Bo says he needs to pick Rafe's brain on a case. "It must be a small case," says Sami. She leaves.

Bo tells Rafe, "I know exactly what Sami's done."

Parker yawns. The show is putting him to sleep, too. Phillip tells Chloe she's a tough cookie, "You have the IQ of one, too, and your life is just as crummy." They both agree they made a stupid mistake but chuckle that they got away with it. Parker gets fussy and Phillip calms him down.

Carly panics because Melanie was the nurse on the Rodriguez case. She runs around like a crazy woman (sorry for the redundancy) and tries to get hold of Melanie.

Daniel asks Melanie if she's eaten anything unusual or had contact with anyone unusual. Being she's in Salem, it takes her about a half hour to tell him who she's been around that might be unusual. She tells him about Mr. Rodriguez, and says Nathan was with her.

Nathan gets sicker but, hey, consider whom he is with. He collapses and Stephanie orders someone to call for help.

Melanie gets sicker. Daniel asks her if she was wearing gloves when she treated Rodriguez. "Oops," says well-trained nurse Melanie. She collapses and Daniel carries her off.

Phillip says he has realized he's ready to start a family. Good thing, Daddy. They both agree each other would make great parents. Parker weighs in as the Loyal Opposition to that point of view.

Carly leaves a message for Melanie, then calls Daniel, who tells her what's going on.

They wheel Nathan in. Ben explains things to Stephanie, and says Rodriguez died. He orders Maxine to test Stephanie. Phillip overhears them talking about Melanie and wonders what's up.

EJ is back at the Hernandez Hovel. He says he saw the guys leave and wants to talk to Sami about the video. Sami says he has nothing on her, except an ironclad confession. She says she wishes she had succeeded in killing him.

Carly, Daniel and Ben reconnoiter. Daniel assures Melanie he won't let anything to happen to her. Stephanie watches and worries as they decide Melanie and Nathan have to be isolated. Phillip wants to know what's going on, "We don't know," yells Carly, "What do you think we are, doctors?"

Bo and Rafe are at the pub. He tells Rafe he's sitting on a ticking time bomb. Rafe jumps out of his chair. Rafe tells Bo Sami has no defense, and he can't protect her.

EJ says it's too bad he wasn't recording Sami's threat. Sami says she was out of her mind when she shot him (with Sami, the fact she was out of her mind goes without saying). EJ says he was contemplating suicide because Sami took his kids from him, "YOU TRIED TO MURDER ME!" Sami rationalizes and reminds him of everything that led up to the attempt. EJ insists Sami will go to jail for a very long time.

"You can't make that happen and you know it," says Sami.

"Try me," says EJ.

Stephanie sits with Phillip, who gets snappy, then apologizes for it. Stephanie snorts back, "Stop pretending like you even give a damn."

Both Stephanie and Phillip are worried sick, so they decide the thing to do is bicker about what will happen if Nathan and Melanie are locked up together. Oh-so-sensitive Stephanie says if Melanie croaks Phillip has other options.

"Melanie is my life," says Phillip.

"Right... except for when she's not," says Stephanie.

The docs talk about the case as Maxine reports Nathan and Melanie are in the isolation unit. She leaves and Phillip walks up and offers to do anything he can, "I can get a private jet.. give money... bang a worried fiancée... — I'm especially good at that one..."

Bo advises Rafe to marry Sami and then he won't be able to testify against her, "My hands are tied." Rafe decides he and Sami will marry. Caroline overhears and drops her jaw.

EJ suggests Sami not lecture him on what is admissible in court. Sami brings up everything he has done and he claims none of it can be used in court. He also tells her the video is inadmissible unless he can find something to corroborate it, "I don't have to make something up. I know where the smoking gun is."

Caroline butts in and Bo tells her he and Rafe need privacy. Caroline says if her granddaughter is getting married right away she should know. Rafe and Bo calm her down and Caroline gives her blessing.

Sami insists there is no smoking gun. "What about the one in the river," asks EJ, "The one you talk about on the video."

"It certainly wouldn't still be smoking," says Sami. She backpedals and says there is no gun.

EJ wonders what if he produced it in court, "The one I retrieved from the river."

Stephanie walks into Chloe's room as Clhoe sleeps. Stephanie looks at Parker and Phillip walks in. Stephanie says she is in there looking for him, "I wanted to tell you I'm sorry for what I said about you and Melanie. I know you really care about her. I could tell that when I watched the two of you cavorting on the Internet." Phillip says he knows she cares, and Chloe wakes. Phillip tells her about Melanie and Nathan having Guatemala Fever and the guy who died form it. Chloe wants to know if Daniel has been exposed.

Carly tells Daniel both Melanie and Nathan are extremely weak. "This isn't about character," says Daniel.

Bo finds Carly, who tells him both Nathan and Melanie are critical. Daniel heads for the lab. Carly panics and Bo supports her.

Clhoe also panics. She worries about Daniel as Maxine walks in. Maxine calms her down a bit and Phillip and Stephanie leave. Chloe stops Maxine from taking Parker.

"I've gone on a walkabout to find myself. If you happen to find me first, please contact me." - Jack Deveraux.

Melanie and Nathan lie in isolation. Melanie asks about the funny way the attendant is dressed. "Hazmat," says Nathan.

"Who's Matt," asks Melanie, proving she's blonde through and through. Nathan tells her the guy they caught this from died.

Rafe calls. Sami answers and tells him things are going fine. Rafe asks her not to answer if EJ calls. They end the conversation. Gabi walks in, "You've got that look."

"What look."

"The one you always have," says Gabi, "like there is only a vacuum between your ears."

Sami tells EJ Rafe will be home soon so he'd better get out, "And if you have that gun, just bring it to court." EJ asks if she wants to throw the rest of her life away. He says he chose not to show the gun to Bo because he wants control, "I have your life in my hands and I want to squeeze very hard." I'll bet he does.

Maxine tells Chloe she has to take the baby because of the Guatemala Fever outbreak. She wheels Parker out as Chloe huffs and puffs.

Bo leaves and Daniel comes up and tells Carly he has a clean bill of health. Ben says they have isolated the virus.

Speaking of isolation, we're back with Melanie and Nathan. Nathan gets up and tucks her in. They both lie there shivering. Melanie tells him she's scared. Nathan tries to be reassuring and they decide they're stuck with each other.

Gabi leaves the pub. Rafe makes a call to some mystery guy, "I need your help."

EJ says he knows it's difficult for Sami since she thought she would win. But now the tables have turned, "You tried to take my life away from me and now I will return the favor... only I will succeed."


Previews
========

Kate tells Brady, "She's going to come after everyone we love."

Nicole asks Rafe, "Will you still love her when she's convicted of attempted murder?"

Sami begs, "Please don't do this, EJ. Please. I am begging you."

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Popcorn, Anyone?

Nicole is with EJ in the rumpus room telling him she can help him get his children back. Well, by golly, if she can do that, EJ will give her anything she wants. "Good," says Nicole, "Because I can hand you Sami Brady on a silver platter."

"Even the DiMeras don't own a silver platter that big," says EJ, "We did, however, just buy Weyerhaeuser and Alcoa so I could get you a piece of 4' x 8' plywood covered in tin foil.

Bo walks in on Carly at the pub. Carly's wrapping baby stuff. They get smoochy and gross out everyone in the pub, especially Jennifer, who walks up behind them.

Melanie and Nathan continue to bicker about not working together. Nathan throws up his doctor status, while the viewers simply throw up. Dr. Ben walks in and tells them to grow up. Not likely.

Daniel and Chloe gush over the kid as Phillip comes in. Daniel leaves and Phillip tells her things really worked out well — she got what she wants and Phillip got a freebie.

Stephanie walks into the hospital and Daniel finds her. He asks if everything is OK and, of course, it isn't.

Rafe tells Sami EJ's plan was to take the kids and run, but they got lucky. The kids weren't so lucky, though... they're still stuck with Sami.

Nicole tells EJ she doesn't want his wealth in return. She just wants one thing.

Rafe starts to call Roman but Sami stops him, wanting to know what happened with Nicole.

The one thing Nicole wants is... "Sydney."

EJ says nothing would make him happier, "Make sure your passport is in order and I'll send you there right away, but only if you promise never to come back." He also reminds her he doesn't have his kids right now. Well, this is, of course nothing but a small complication which Nicole suggests she can eliminate. At that, she whips out her trusty video camera-player gizmo and plays Sami's confession.

Stunned EJ nearly collapses, "OMG, that's it. That's Arianna's proof!"

"No," says Nicole, "That was the trailer to Sami's next blockbuster movie."

Jen, Bo and Carly share an uncomfortable moment. Bo the coward scoots. Jennifer sits with Carly and they try to play like everything is OK. Jennifer says she's there to work on Alice's estate but Maggie's out of town. Carly invites her to meet Daniel and Melanie, but Jennifer declines since she's already had such a bad day.

Rafe says he downloaded the virus to Nicole's computer and if she plugs the camera in it will destroy the original file itself.

EJ wonders how Nicole got the camera. She says it was in Arianna's safety deposit box. But Nicole says this is about her love for Sydney, so she tried to deal with Sami and Rafe, but things didn't work out... so she came to EJ.

"I noticed that," says EJ. He's observant like that. Nicole just wants him to give Sami what she deserves and then to be a part of Sydney's life.

Dr. Walters tells Nathan and Melanie to find replacements and sign out for the day. He leaves. Melanie and Nathan give each other looks that could kill.

Step-on-me says nothing is going on, and she heard Daniel's baby was doing well. He confirms that Chloe is doing just fine. Daniel still thinks something is going on with Stephanie. He assures her it would make life easier if she put all the Chloe-Melanie-Nathan stuff aside.

Melanie stammers, insists she loves Phillip, but says she can't work with Nathan, "It hurts too much."

"If you want to talk about pain," says Nathan, "Try working with you."

Rafe doesn't know if Nicole suspects anything. Sami congratulates him on his plan's success before they know it worked.

"Raising children is a really tough job. I don't know how the babysitters do it." -Sami Brady

Nicole says Sydney is the most important person in her life, except for Nicole, of course. She says she wasn't thinking straight by going to Sami and Rafe first.

EJ says, "If I could put the past behind me..."

"Where else would it be," asks Nicole.

"Up yours," snorts EJ.

"Well, I know for sure it's not there," says Nicole.

EJ asks, "If I could do that, do you trust me?" Nicole admits she needs him and knows he will do the right thing.

Stephanie asks about Nathan, and Daniel says he's not there, "If there is anything you need, let me know."

"You mean besides a boatload of self esteem," asks Stephanie. Daniel leaves. Stephanie decides Caroline was out of her mind to switch the results. She decides she has to let the cat out of the bag, but in a way that doesn't hurt Caroline.

Daniel is with Chloe, Phillip and Danchloephil, Jr. He takes the baby and immediately suggests letting brother-in-law-daddy Phillip hold him. Phillip takes him and passes him back to Daniel. The baby gets motion sickness and Daniel goes to see if he can find a doctor.

Rafe gets off the phone and announces the cops will be there shortly, "If you don't know what to say, call me." Meantime, he's off to the Kiriakis mansion to steal the camera. He opens the door.

EJ!

Daniel and Jennifer are together. Daniel says it's nice to meet her and Jen also asks to meet Melanie. There is no accounting for the lack of taste of some people. "When you have a child with someone it's like you're bound to them for life," says Jennifer.

"Yes," says Daniel, "They call it parenthood."

Stephanie and Phillip bump into each other and Stephanie runs like a scared rabbit.

Nathan orders a beer in the pub.

Maxine tells Dr. Walters that Javier Rodriguez has died. Dr. Walters puts another notch in his stethoscope.

Daniel joins Melanie and Chloe who are faking being able to stand each other. Daniel gets a call and leaves. Carly begs her to forgive her eventually. Melanie no can do. She runs off. Daniel stands behind Carly, "What is going on?"

Rafe showers EJ with expletives-deleted. EJ, however has something to say, "I have it, Samantha... I think you lovebirds will have a really bad day today."

Carly sloughs Daniel off. Translation: pisses him off. Bo congratulates the pair and leaves. Carly tells Daniel to talk to Melanie.

Maxine says Rodriguez was doing OK this morning. Ben asks her to find out about anyone who had contact with him.

Melanie stands alone and wonders why things feel so wrong. This happens to Melanie a lot.

Stephanie finds Nathan in the pub. Nathan lies and says they were overstaffed and he gets to take a break. Stephanie says she needs his help.

It's just Phillip and Chloe. We all know what happened the last time they were alone together: Parker. Phillip leaves as Carly comes in. Chloe thanks her for everything, "You've been an amazing friend." She senses something is wrong. Carly says it's complicated. Chloe tells her to be hopeful, "I think Melanie is going to get past this."

Jennifer stops Ben to apologize for being upset with him earlier, but Dr. Ben just rushes past her.

Rafe tells EJ he's going to jail for what he did to Sami. EJ says he thought Sami and Rafe had won. He pulls out the video camera. Sami and Rafe give us looks of shame and guilt.

EJ struts in ready to play the video, "Popcorn, anyone?"

Stephanie tells Nathan what she is about to say has to stay between them, then tells him Caroline did something awful. "I know says Nathan... and then the world got Bo."

Daniel finds Melanie at the pier. He asks why she's not at the hospital and Melanie says it doesn't matter. She asks him to go back to Parker. Daniel ain' goin' nowhere, "What is bothering you? Let me help you. You should trust me. We're in this together." More than they know.

Nicole joins Carly and Chloe. Carly leaves and Nicole says she wants to meet the Parkster. She gives Chloe a mobile from Auntie Nicole, and asks if Chloe is nervous about Carly and Melanie blabbing. Clhoe says no. Nicole tells her things are looking up.

EJ continues to play the video. Rafe gets macho, but Bo interrupts, "What's going on here?" Somebody solved a crime but once again, it wasn't Bo.

Dr. Ben tells Carly about Mr. Rodriguez dying. "Oh, no," says Carly, "I thought that was supposed to be my kill."

Nathan gets woozy. Stephanie asks if he's OK and puts her hand on his forehead, "HEAL, LORD, HEAL."

Melanie also gets woozy and faints in front of Daniel.

Nicole says Chloe got her miracle and Nicole is about to get her miracle, "It has everything to do with Sydney."

"OMG, Nicole, what have you done," asks Clhoe.

EJ encourages Samantha to tell Bo what's up. Silence. EJ decides to step up to the plate and tell.

Previews
========

Stephanie tells Phillip, "Stop pretending like you even give a damn."

EJ tells Sami, "I have proof that you tried to murder me."

Bo tells Rafe, "I know exactly what Sami's done."

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Color Me Cuckoo

Well gee whillikers, since the writers think you don't have the sense to remember what was going on when we left the show yesterday, the show starts up where we left off in the Hernandez Hovel, only we rewind to Sami being distracted and EJ rushing her with either an influenza-saturated snot rag, or one full of chloroform. He clamps it over the nose and mouth of the Hernandez Hovel Hostess and it knocks her out. EJ carries her to the couch and cops a few feels. Hey, come on, what's the harm... she's unconscious. Suddenly...

"SSSCCCRRREEEEAAAAMMM!"

Allie stands in back of him and screams in horror. "What's the matter," asks EJ.

"You didn't bring me any presents," cries Allie.

"Why would I bring you a present," asks EJ, "You're not my kid."

"On this show, you never can tell," says Allie, "You'd do well to plan for future plot twists."

Back in Sarcoville, Maggie slaps at non-existent spiders. She huffs and puffs and enjoins herself to get a grip. She doesn't do a great job of it.

Stephanie and Nathan are at the pub. Caroline is there as Nathan gets a call, "WHAT?" he leaves. Stephanie says he looks upset. Caroline tells her he'll be more upset if the learns the truth.

Brady finds Melanie at the hospital. He says he's there to see Chloe and asks Melanie about delivering the baby. "Chloe had it at the cabin instead," says Melanie, "The delivery service was too expensive." She says Chloe is sleeping, but assures him things went OK. She thinks he looks rumpled and nervous.

Nicole plays with Sydney at the Kiriakis mansion as Rafe sabotages her computer. He finishes the job and walks back in. He suggests she not let Allie play with the camera or she might erase the precious copy of Sami's confession. Nicole reminds him she has backup copies.

EJ tells Allie her mommy is just sleeping.

Nicole tells Sydney how much fun they will have on Christmas. She suggests to Rafe that she have Sydney on Christmas Eve and Thanksgiving. Rafe ain' too excited about that. Nicole makes threats. "This plan of yours could backfire and bite you in the ass," says Rafe.

EJ covers Sami so she can nap. Johnny rushes out and jumps onto him.

Vivian contacts Maggie. She tells her Gus has contacted Victor and is spreading the word on something that will make people think Maggie is gone. Maggie says no one would believe she has left town without saying goodbye.

Caroline reminds Stephanie she promised she would keep quiet about the big secret. Stephanie is undecided, but thinks she has to do the right thing, if she can ever learn to tell right from wrong.

Nathan comes back and announces Victor got an email from Maggie that says she's on a cruise and doesn't know when she'll be back.

Victor is at the hospital asking Melanie about Maggie leaving. Melanie says Maggie hasn't said anything about it, "If Maggie left without telling anybody, then something is really wrong."

Nicole tells Rafe this isn't a scheme and was meant to happen. Rafe thinks she's restless and needs a diaper change. Nicole assures him she is wearing clean diapers. She leaves to check Sydney and Rafe grabs the video recorder.

EJ sends Allie off and tells Johnny his mommy isn't feeling well. He also says they will be spending lotsa time together.

Melanie calls and leaves a message for Maggie to contact her. Brady says Maggie told him to stay away from Victor and thinks she might have taken her own advice.

Nicole comes back and sees Rafe playing with the recorder. She says she knows he knew Sydney didn't need a diaper change, "You are never going to find what you are looking for."

EJ suggests he and Johnny spend time together tonight. He tells Johnny to get his stuff so they can go, and Sydney, too. Johnny announces Sydney isn't there because Rafe took her somewhere. EJ tells him to go get his things. Johnny runs off. EJ calls Marco and wonders why he hasn't been watching Rafe, "If you've blown this..." He slams down the phone, "Now what am I gonna do?" Follow the bread crumbs Rafe dropped so he could find his way back home?

Nathan says he thinks Maggie would never leave town without telling people, "We can't set a wedding date until we find out when she'll be back, OK?" Stephanie stammers.

Vivian says she chose the paint from a special collection called, "Color Me Cuckoo. I think it's working. Soon you won't even be able to remember your name."

"That doesn't bother me so much," says Maggie, "Just as long as I can remember the names of the people I'm gossiping about."

Rafe decides to hang on to the video recorder. Nicole assures him she didn't leave the proof lying around for him, "Face the facts. I hold all the cards, so get the hell out."

Rafe agrees, "But if I go... Sydney goes." Brady walks in and wants to know why Nicole is holding the baby. "Sami isn't even here," says Nicole. Rafe takes Sydney while Brady stares at Nicole.

EJ tells Johnny they will have to do this another time, "It's getting late and you have school tomorrow." He sends him back to his room to play, but assures him he'll come back. Johnny leaves. EJ tells Sami he'll be back. Sami, however has BTADD... Big Time Attention Deficit Disorder.

Melanie is with a patient, who says he was in Guatemala yesterday and doesn't feel well today. Melanie diagnoses his disease as Guatemala Fever. Nathan comes in. "Where the hell have you been," asks Melanie.

"Reading up on Guatemala Fever," says Nathan, "It's a good thing no one around here has it because it's totally fatal."

Caroline and Stephanie — same conversation.

Nicole tells Brady Rafe is trying to broker a truce between Sami and her. Rafe leaves with Sydney. Brady and Nicole stare at each other. Outside, Rafe tells Sydney if Nicole plugs the camera into her laptop it will destroy everything and Sydney will never have to see that crazy lady again.

Nicole steps up to her computer and curses. Brady questions her about it.

EJ is on the phone with Marco who reports that Rafe took Sydney to see Nicole. EJ figures Rafe wouldn't do that unless he had no choice.

Nathan questions the patient about his adventures in Guatemala, "Did anything bite you?"

"She was kind of rough but didn't bite," says the guy.

Nathan and Melanie snap at each other and Dr. Nathan takes her aside and lectures her for using "that tone of voice."

Nicole tells Brady she has a virus on her computer. Brady warns her not to try to make copies of programs or the original could self destruct. He asks what happened to her head and Nicole says she ran into a cabinet, "I also ran into Sydney the other night and realized I still love her. So I sucked it up and asked Sami if I could see her now and then. I didn't think she’d do it, but then Rafe showed up with Sydney. But I am starting to think Rafe and Sami are just playing me."

Rafe arrives back at the Hernandez Hovel. Johnny tells him mommy is asleep. Rafe puts Sydney's carrier down as Johnny tells him his daddy said his mommy didn't feel good. Rafe panics and tries to wake Sami.

OK the news guys just broke in to tell us about the Royal Engagement. Note to press: I DON"T CARE! By the way, did that Diana and Charles couple ever tie the knot?

Melanie comforts the patient and Nathan compliments her nursing skills, "Delivering that baby must have scared the hell out of you."

"Not like it scared the hell out of Chloe and the baby."

Stephanie says if Nathan finds out and figures she didn't tell him the truth, Nathan will hate her forever, "I know what I have to do."

Sami stirs. Rafe goes to her and she wakes up, "WHERE ARE THE KIDS?" She says she remembers being with Will, but can't remember anything after that. She says she feels queasy. "That's the chloroform," says Rafe, "EJ did it."

Mr. Chloroform himself is in the rumpus room. The doorbell rings and EJ answers to find Nicole. She says she's there because of what she can do for him.

Melanie begs Nathan to let her know if he finds out anything about Maggie. Nathan says he will and their bickering starts up again. He asks if she thinks Stephanie would say something about Chloe to get back at Melanie. He also offers to have her scratched off the guest list of his wedding with Stephanie. Melanie tells him she doesn't want to work with him any more.

Vivian tells Maggie it's time for dinner and offers to liven up her chicken broth with bacon bits. Vivian signs off. Maggie wonders what's happening to her, "Someone will find me... someone... please... soon."

Sami can't believe EJ did this to her. Rafe tells her what happened while she was out... that EJ was going to take the kids, but didn't because Sydney wasn't there. Rafe has found out the DiMera jet is all gassed and ready to go, "It's not gonna happen again. We got lucky." Rafe calls Roman, who hasn't gotten lucky in years.

EJ and Nicole hit the rumpus room. "Why are you here," asks EJ.

Nicole asks if he remembers when it was just her and EJ and Sydney, "Those were the good old days. I didn't lie about Sydney being your child, or about me loving her. That's why I'm here. What if I told you I could get your children back?"

"I'd give you anything you want."

"Good," says Nicole, "Because I could hand you Sami Brady on a silver platter."

"I'd rather have her on silk sheets," says EJ.


Previews
========

There were no previews. Maybe after 45 years, they're just tossing DOOL into the black hole of soapdom.

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