Thinking With His Other Brain

Rafe calling EJ a moron is like Jerry Quarry calling Muhammad Ali a loser. #DAYS

 

Blithering Will was ecstatically happy with Nick. The reason he left so quickly, though, was that he got the munchies. #DAYS

 

Sami: "You've been so good to me lately." Keep that sheep's disguise on a bit longer, EJ, and you may be feasting at the Sami buffet. #DAYS

 

Kristin outsmarts Brady again. It's easy to do when Brady is thinking with his... uh... other brain. #DAYS

 

Sami tells EJ he's been patient with her.  Yeah, especially when she blew his brains out. #DAYS

Slathered In Smug Superiority

Kate's going to make sure Nick's parole is revoked? Who died and appointed her head of the parole board? #DAYS

 

The Prevuze unabashed dictionary defines left field as that place where Billie's differences with Kate came from. #DAYS

 

Hope flings her pen across the room.  That'll teach that stinkin' pen to run out of ink. #DAYS

 

Come on, Marlena and Kristin. #DOOL needs a good catfight.  Senior division, of course. #DAYS

 

Kristin says Marlena is slathered in smug superiority. That must be Countess Wilhelmina's new perfume. #DAYS

Six Lies From The Truth

Daniel says Nicole is about six lies from the truth.  I guess she's lying less these days. #DAYS

 

Kristin tells Roman that Brady made all her dreams come true.  She must dream about men half her age. #DAYS

 

Nicole: "If you can't trust a priest who can you trust?" Don't ask a lot of choir boys that question. #DAYS

 

Brady tells Victor he has Mr. Hwang on the line.  Vic should just tell Brady to Hwang up on him. #DAYS

 

Jen and Chloe talk. Daniel's confused. Women talking & a guy's confused. Happens to every guy every day, Daniel. #DAYS

 

Billie: "I traded heroin for another addiction." Lip surgery? #DAYS

God Forbid

John announces he's leaving town. Roman shops for a Valentine's day card for Marlena. #DAYS

 

Did you notice the temperature drop in the room when Maggie walked in and saw Nicole? #DAYS

 

Chloe: "If, God forbid, you & Daniel don't work out..." Translation: If, God forbid, you and Daniel do work out... #DAYS

 

Judgmental Father Eric kicks Kristin and Brady off the board. I guess he got promoted right past Pope and is now God. #DAYS

 

John says he's leaving. At least Marlena is a mature, centered psychiatrist who won't ever grovel... uh... never mind. #DAYS

Ejamius Interruptus

Ejamius Interruptus – yet again.

Infield Fly Rule

After Gabi's sonogram she gets treated for whiplash after the 180° in Nick's attitude toward Will. #DAYS

 

EJ almost got to second base but it turned out to be more like the infield fly rule — an automatic out. #DAYS

 

Sami says Lucas is quite a wit. She's half right, anyway. #DAYS

 

Why is Sami so upset about being a grandmother? Because that's who you dump your kids on when you need a babysitter. #DAYS

The Misunderstanding

 

Fw: EJ's White Horse

Nick's worried about everyone who wants to be part of the baby's life. Here's an idea, how bout you and Gabi just head for Timbuktu? #DAYS

 

Sami and Rafe argue. Good thing the white horse EJ rides in on to save her is figurative, or there could be quite a mess in the church #DAYS

 

Nick wonders how this will all play out. Like it always does. Five years from now we'll find out the baby is really Nick's. #DAYS

 

Will: "Sonny, I understand you don't want to see me any more..." But since they're the only two main character gays on the show... #DAYS

The President's Second Term Worries Begin

 

The Presidency... such a demanding job.

The Hooker And The Porn Star

 

Chloe... a gal who's been around the block.  And that block is in the red-light district.  So when she's worried about her past as a prostitute, where does Chloe go for advice? To Nicole, a.k.a. Misty Circle, Salem's very own porn star.

Constructive Criticism

Nicole thinks Kate gave Jennifer the dirt on Chloe.  Couldn't be. She doesn't own a dump truck. #DAYS

 

Sami tells Will she and he will keep talking until he figures things out. I have a feeling SHE'LL keep talking. #DAYS

 

Brady faints! OMG! I wonder if he's pregnant. #DAYS

 

Sami says she's not judging Will & then rants about all his faults. I guess that's constructive criticism. #DAYS

Pure Evil

Chloe says Kate is pure evil.  I guess that's her attempt to give evil a bad name. #DAYS

 

Fashion statement: John's facial cuts and bruises are better than Brady's. #DAYS

 

Kate: "Chloe is laying the groundwork and that's not all she'll be laying." Hey, that's my line, Kate. #DAYS

 

Chloe says there's not a guy in town who hasn't taken Nicole for a spin.  They tell Chloe all about it when they take her for a spin. #DAYS

Two Humongous Scoops

Don't worry, Brady won't be getting back together with Chloe... until his face bruises heal. #DAYS

 

Marlena can't believe she's a psychiatrist but losing badly to Kristin. Maybe she's losing badly because she's a bad psychiatrist. #DAYS

 

I can't tell if Kate has azure blue fingernails or is carrying around paint chips for her new bedroom color. #DAYS

 

Parker gets a cool truck. I hope they let the kids keep the toys they get on the show. #DAYS

 

If Parker likes ice cream & other things just like his daddy, then he'd probably want two humongous scoops. #DAYS

Don't Blame Will, He's Only The Father

EXCLUSIVE - Video of Gabi and Nick's wedding: http://bit.ly/UNLhn7 #DAYS

 

Rafe claims this isn't about Sami.  If a star explodes in the Andromeda galaxy Sami thinks it's about her. #DAYS

 

Lucas is right that Will can be with his kid growing up. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. #DAYS

 

Sami wants Rafe to stop blaming this on Will. Right. He's only the father. #DAYS

Exclusive Video Of Gabi & Nick's Wedding

Yes, it was the most amazing train wreck ever.

The Biggest Train Wreck Ever

Well, that confirms it. Chad wants to be a private eye when he grows up, because he has proven he's a natural-born dick. #DAYS

 

For the first time ever Safes and Ejamis join forces and root for Rafe to beat the crap out of Chad. #DAYS

 

What do you suppose Chad's chances are with Abby now... Somewhere between zero and ax murder? #DAYS

 

Casey Jones should have been the priest instead of Eric, because this wedding is the biggest train wreck ever. #DAYS

Sami Can't Decide

Perhaps Sami will figure out her love life by the time she's a great grandmother.

12,000 Shows

12,000 shows... If you've been there from the beginning you've spent almost a full 1 1/2 years doing nothing but watching #DAYS

 

12,000 hours... coincidentally, that's how long it took Jennifer to explain the Daniel-Chloe-Phillip double switcheroo to Abby. #DAYS

 

OK, Will, if Nick & Gabi don't want to go along with you, just spread the news about who's the daddy. #DAYS

 

Gabi reminds us they're going through what Will went through with Lucas and Austin. Yeah, same scripts and everything. #DAYS

Victor's Slut Collection

EJ, Rafe, Lucas, Sasquatch... Sami, you're about to become a grandmother.  Just make a decision. #DAYS

 

Sami doesn't want to talk about what Kristin is doing.  Maybe she didn't notice: Brady's doing it, too. #DAYS

 

Kate: "You let that slut stay in your house?" As I recall, Kate herself has been part of Victor's slut collection? #DAYS

 

Rafe grimaces at "algorithm." Didn't he once tutor Will in advanced algebra? You know, with all its algorithms. #DAYS

Detective Cop-A-Feel

What more appropriate place for Rafe to grope Sami than in church?  Too bad they didn't get a more private pew in the back where they could get it on while Eric was going through the wedding rehearsal.

Copping Feels In Church

"The Hand" returns! Or was it "The Glove?" Well, we know one thing for sure: It wasn't "The Brain." #DAYS

 

Daniel's harem: Jennifer, Chloe, Nicole. The only bright spot in his life is that polygamy is illegal. #DAYS

 

I don't know what's worse: Daniel failing to keep matter & antimatter apart in the lab, or failing to keep Chloe & Jennifer apart. #DAYS

 

Victor says Jennifer can't let developments change things for her. No worries, Jennifer will still be unbearable. #DAYS

 

Rafe sits by Sami in church copping feels. Class, Rafe. Real class. #DAYS

Letting it all hang out

Today's episode made me wonder what #DOOL writers did before they had scripts to recycle or history to rewrite. #DAYS

 

When Jennifer fell and you heard someone yelling "DIE! DIE! DIE!" that wasn't me. I was just thinking it. #DAYS

 

Lucas says Jen's making a mistake. Right. He hasn't had a stable relationship unless you count that time he had sex in Seabiscuit's stall. #DAYS

 

So, Chloe is back along with the ghosts of Stephanie and Phillip. #DAYS

 

Dear Nick: Think Gabi's baby isn't yours? Wait until they recycle the Daniel/Phil/Chloe script & hand it to you. #DAYS

 

Jennifer bolts from the hospital.  She would have to double her IQ to qualify as a dumb blonde. #DAYS

 

A bachelor party at a coffee house. Nick orders decaf. He's letting it all hang out, isn't he? #DAYS

 

#DOOL writer's credo: When all else fails, pull a parenthood switcheroo. #DAYS

Downton Abbey This Ain't

Here come some thoughts on today's #DOOL — better known as "Downton Abbey this ain't." #DAYS

 

Chloe: "Can we please not do this in the hallway?" Me: "Can we please not do this anywhere?" #DAYS

 

John wonders if Marlena knew about Kristin & Brady. Hasn't he learned the rules? The husband is always the last to know. #DAYS

 

Kristin chips a nail. Finally, a real emergency on #DAYS

 

Careful, John. Statistics show screaming accusations at your partner severely reduce your near-term chances of getting laid. #DAYS

 

Stephanie calls. Kayla says she's been missed. No she hasn't. #DAYS

 

Sami says she'd rather stick needles in her eye than socialize with Kristin. I'm surprised Kristin didn't pull out her sewing kit. #DAYS

 

Stephanie? Calm down? The sun is more likely to rise in the west tomorrow. #DAYS

 

Sami goes to get some air. She could stay with John and Marlena and get some hot air. #DAYS

 

If you couldn't see Chloe's news roaring in like a runaway freight train, you flunk #DOOL 101. #DAYS

Brady's Time Out

The wicked step-mommy puts her foot down...

Coldcock

Kristin says she didn't think John would coldcock his own son. Well, isn't it her job to keep it warm anyway? #DAYS

Kristin insists John still wants her. Right. Nothing fans the flames of passion like seeing your son boinking your former lover. #DAYS

Marlena lectures Brady like he's a teenager who's been seduced by some 40-year-old cougar. At least the age difference is the same. #DAYS

Kristin says John drove her insane.  Well, he sure doesn't need a do-over on that little project. #DAYS

Priests And Morons

EJ turns on the charm. Sami hasn't encountered a smoothie this good since her last trip to Dairy Queen. #DAYS

 

How come John didn't pull some of his superspy moves on Brady? Why couldn't he take him while drinking his shaken-not-stirred martini? #DAYS

 

Kristin: "Isn't it a shame it had to come to this?" Most definitely. A cat fight between her and Marlena would have been much better. #DAYS

 

Nicole vows she's giving up men. Except for priests and morons, apparently. #DAYS

 

EJ stops Sami as she goes for Kristin's throat. Dammit, EJ, mind your own business. #DAYS

The Slobber Flows

It's the new year in Salem. The clock strikes 12, the slobber flows. #DAYS

 

Kristin asks if Brady believes everything between them is a lie. Brady says no, but wonders why Kristin's pants are on fire. #DAYS

 

EJ tells Sami he was waylaid. Truth is, he was dang-near Nicole-laid. #DAYS

 

Kristin says John can't wrap his brain around the fact Brady's crazy for her. John can't wrap his brain around a B-B. #DAYS

 

Well, Ejamis, the US didn't go over the Fiscal Cliff and once again, Sami and EJ didn't go over the Physical Cliff. #DAYS #DateusInterruptus

Sniffin' Around Sami

Brady announces to Marlena that he's been seeing Kristin DiMera.  He sure has... all of her. #DAYS

EJ and Sami kiss.  Happy New Year's, Ejamis.  Rafe and Sami kiss. Happy New Year's, Safes. #DAYS

If any more guys come sniffin' around Sami they'll have to move the New Year's Eve party to the Salem Stadium. #DAYS

 

Nicole plays a drunk well. Practice makes perfect. #DAYS

Jennifer says she brought the dessert they had to skip on their date. I bet that wasn't the dessert Dan had in mind. #DAYS