Flying Rodents

Pop quiz for Joey: Ava is out of: A)Your league B)Your generation C) Her mind D)All of the above. #TheAnswerIsD #DAYS

 

Chad must like flying rodents. wants to move from a gal who's batsh*t crazy to one who has bats in her belfry. #DAYS

 

Kayla: "A girl's gotta play hard to get."  In Salem "hard to get" means taking time to ask, "your place or mine?" #DAYS

Diagnosis

 

Beauzeaux

Theresa: "I have pins... and needles..." And I'm on them with all this excitement. #DAYS

 

Nicole: "Kate brought in that Pierre bozo." He's French. I think should be "beauzeaux." #DAYS

 

#DOOL missed the boat by not having Tim Gunn as a guest star on this show.  Probably couldn't afford him. #DAYS

A Not-So-Friendly Game

 

An Arrogant Narcissistic Bitch On Wheels

Theresa really got depressed when she got kicked off of Project Dumbway. #DAYS

 

Nicole: "You are an arrogant narcissistic bitch on wheels." Kate: "Flattery will get you nowhere." #DAYS

 

Belle learns it was a lot more fun to be a cheating slut before the repercussions started to affect her. #DAYS

A Little Bit O' Belle

Tim Gunn can't hold a candle to Kate when it comes to nit picking. #DAYS

 

André: "We'll get our money back." Stefano: "Or maybe we won't." Odds are good it's one or the other. #DAYS

 

Chad: "Sometimes I just can't help myself." Then he moves in and helps himself to a little bit o' Belle. #DAYS

 

If Rafe really believes Hope tweaked her back he's as dumb as a... never mind. #DAYS

Experts On Evil

 

Caroline And "Theresa"

 

Victor Suggests A New Game

I'll bet Victor doesn't even know how to play bridge.

Falling Temperatures

 

REEEEE-JECTED

Belle and Chad: Chelle? No — I think Bad would be more fitting. #DAYS

 

Jennifer says the song playing is one of Jack's favorites. Sounds like elevator music to me. Definitely NOT Jack's favorite. #DAYS

 

Things were going well with Chad & Belle until Abby stepped in. Only one word for what happened to Chad then: REEEEE-JECTED. #DAYS

The Promised Land

HALLELUJAH! 

The Main Attraction At The Ho-House

Eve to Claire: "I would kill to have your voice." Being Eve, someday she probably will. #DAYS

 

Ava Removes her blouse: "I'm gonna get exactly what I want." Looks like Joey might get something, too. #DAYS

 

Kate says she had to work her way up through the ranks.  Yeah—started small & eventually became the main attraction at the ho-house. #DAYS

Canoodling

If you can't canoodle with the strumpet you love, canoodle with the strumpet you're with.

Schooling

A cop arrested for murder investigating her own case. That happens all the time in real life, right? #DAYS

 

Eduardo wishes he had been around when Nick needed schooling. Gabi schooled him just fine. Gabi and her Gluck. #DAYS

 

Wow. That sure was a fast promotion for the daughter of the mayo... Oh. Congratulations, Lani. #DAYS

The Topknot Twins

 

Abby "Does" Windows

A DA In His Pocket

Phillip: "Does Father have a DA in his pocket?" Or it he just happy to see you? #DAYS

 

Chad: "What if I don't take no for an answer?" Belle: "Then how about a swift kick you-know-where?" Chad: "'No' works for me." #DAYS

 

Victor wants Caroline to move into the Kiriakis Mansion.  Who knew... it must have a psychiatric wing. #DAYS

Priceless

Chad breaks it off with Abby. Abby breaks his breastbone. Fair trade.

A Come-To-Your-Senses Machine

Belle says Marlena is a million miles away. Well, outer space is where you have to be when you're talking to a space cadet. #DAYS

 

Chad dumps Abby. OMG! André's contraption wasn't a mind-control machine. It was a come-to-your-senses machine.

 

Mind control machines, secret training facilities for assassins... can it be anything but a soap opera? #DAYS

Fat Shaming!

Kate calls Tate a "chubby little guy." FAT SHAMING! #DAYS

 

Ava tells the courier to forget he knows her.  Good advice for anybody.  #DAYS

 

Marlena's been spending way too much time laying on her office floor lately. #DAYS

Monitoring Seismographs

Belle wonders if there is any news on Sami. Have they thought of monitoring seismographs in the area? #DAYS

 

Hope tells Jennifer she's not sure when she'll get back from the police station. Uh, in about 30 years to life? #DAYS

 

Chad wants to do something nice for Wendy's family. If Abby's involved the nicest thing they could do is stay away from them. #DAYS

The Life And Times Of Ted Bundy

 

Just Like Martha Stewart

Theresa thinks she has the potential to be just like Martha Stewart—She certainly has the potential to have a prison term like Martha. #DAYS

 

Theresa knows how much the job meant to Brady. Thinking with brain: keeps his job. Thinking with something else: Moves in with her. #DAYS

 

Phillip wonders if Belle went to basketball camp. Oh, yeah, she made a two foot layup. Sign her up for the Bulls. #DAYS

 

Abby: "I guess I'm not all there." There, of course, being wherever the normal people go. #DAYS

Ciara's Big Break

Lani says Rafe finding Malcolm was a stroke of good luck. When Rafe uncovers something it has to be luck. #DAYS \

 

Calm down, Hope, this is Ciara's big break. She always wanted to be on TV. #DAYS

 

Hope swears Bo will come back from the grave to get the creep. He'd better take it seriously. On #DOOL they all come back. #DAYS

The Psycho Part

Rafe: "Hope, you may have said all you want to say but I haven't." Guy Manual:  "A woman has NEVER said all she wants to say." #DAYS

 

Hope wants Rafe to stop psychoanalyzing her. The analyzing part would certainly confirm the psycho part. #DAYS

 

Abby says she needs closure. I hope she means her mouth. #DAYS

Caught In The Act

The Wrong Foot

Obviously Ava got out of the de-wacko-fication program they sent her to; and, more obviously, the program was a failure. #DAYS

 

Patch tells Kayla to stop fighting it & asks what she thinks—FWIW I think he's got his smooth operator persona firing on all cylinders #DAYS

 

Phillip: "I don't want to get off on the wrong foot with you, Brady." Then I hope his only remaining foot is the right one. #DAYS

Par For The Course

Chad: "I found Abby; she had the baby; Ben is the necktie killer." Stefano: "Yeah, but do you have any news."  #DAYS

 

Malcolm chokes Hope. He wants the money. Hope wants air. #DAYS

 

Belle tells Andre she doesn't know what he's talking about. Par for the course for Belle. #DAYS

CRY-sis

Ben swears Abby died in the fire. Does this count as another official "back from the dead" #DOOL return? #DAYS

 

Abigail sure knows how to turn a crisis into a CRY-sis. #DAYS

 

Bo looks down on wacko Hope with Malcolm and thanks his lucky stars he's dead. #DAYS

 

For the record: In the fight at the end I'm seriously rooting for Malcolm. #DAYS

A Shocking Turn Of Events

 

Barbecue Ben's In A Hurry

 

Barbecue Ben Strikes Again

 

The Secret DOOL Decoder Ring

 

Her Rocker-Rocker

Wacko Ben has totally lost his mind. And the fact JJ outsmarted him proves it. #DAYS

 

Malcom thinks Rafe is his shadow. No, he just has the IQ of a shadow. #DAYS

 

Hope: The widow-widow has gone off her rocker-rocker. #DAYS

Don't Watch Alone

Don't Just Do Something, Stand There

Brady throws his life away for Theresa. If the Guy Manual was a human, it would be suicidal. #DAYS

 

The Lone Ranger used silver bullets. Hope uses melted down Kristen Alfonso earrings. #DAYS

 

For God's sake Abby, grab something and whack Ben.  Abby's motto is "don't just do something, stand there." #DAYS

Between Serial Killings

Belle is outraged Sami deposited a fortune into an account with her name on it. I wouldn't be upset if that happened to me. #DAYS

 

Hope says the whole situation seems to easy.  Nothing is too easy for Rafe. #DAYS

 

Seth says he finds Salem tranquil.  Between serial killings, that is. #DAYS

Hope The Fashionista

 

Enough Said

 

St. Beauregard

 

Lucky

Well, there's their lame excuse for Kimberly not attending the funeral.  I suppose it would be too much for Chelsea, too. #DAYS

 

Hope and Rafe play good-cop / bad-cop. In a role reversal Rafe plays the good-cop. #DAYS

 

Abby says they can name the baby whatever Ben wants.  I, for one, would rule out "Lucky." #DAYS

The Truth About Social Media

Pheromones

No wonder Steve and Kayla got romantic: It's the EJAbby Memorial Supply Closet. The place is saturated with pheromones. #DAYS

 

Flynn is using the same script Xander used when he met Nicole. #DAYS

 

Gabi and JJ's "first date" issues reminded me of a "first date" I had at a pizza shop. Except my date hadn't murdered anyone — AFAIK. #DAYS

 

Kayla claims the donors pay her salary. No, Chief of Staph, the patients you rip off pay your salary. #DAYS