Snatched

Chloe wants Jennifer out of the picture. How about off the show? #DAYS

 

Do you wonder what they're doing to Nick in the scenes where he's screaming? They're making him watch #DAYS

 

Hope cautions Gabi not to worry if Nick doesn't want to talk about his time in prison. Hope never wants to talk about hers. #DAYS

 

They tell Jennifer a dozen times they've snatched Parker to keep her away from Dan, but she still asks, "What's going on?" #DAYS

 

Rafe, why not just say the bracelet is Kate's? You can say you found it and knew Kate lost one or something. #DAYS

Don't Think With Your Duck

Jennifer, there is no law that says you have to let Chloe in when she knocks, or even open the door for that matter. #DAYS

 

Brady tells Victor he's misinterpreting. Not true, Victor knows very well Brady's thinking with his d*ck. #DAYS

 

Per that last item. You shouldn't think with your duck because ducks have less brain capacity than humans. That's what I meant. #DAYS

 

What's up with Chloe? Daniel means everything to her and he's nailing another woman. Isn't that her signal to run to Phillip? #DAYS

Romping On The Town Square Couch

Kristin: "Since when can we have a rational conversation with John and Marlena?" Since when can anybody? #DAYS

 

Sonny walks in on Rafe and Kate; Chloe spies Jennifer and Daniel; they should all just all take turns romping on the town square couch #DAYS

 

Nancy doesn't want Chloe to get in too deep. No worries. Nothing deep about Chloe. #DAYS

 

Daniel: "While we are here the rest of the world doesn't exist." The rest of the world doesn't care. #DAYS

A Few Protips

Protip for Abby: Ripping a guy's clothes off isn't exactly a signal that you want to take things slow. #DAYS

 

Protip II for Abby: If you rip Cameron's top off, he gets to rip yours off. #DAYS

 

Protip III for Abby: If you're so upset about being a virgin, you need a new game plan. #DAYS

 

 

Rafe And Kate Play Slap And Tickle

Playing slap-and-tickle... Kate's way.

Natural Screw-Ups And Divine Inspiration

Kristin tells Brady she won't be the wife waiting at the door with a frying pan.  She uses a gun. #DAYS

 

Gabi and Will agree they didn't want things to be like this. They didn't plan it that way, they're just natural screw-ups. #DAYS

 

Eric: "Brady, you're not a complete jerk, you're a moron." Eric really must have a direct line to Divine inspiration. #DAYS

Her Sinful Agenda

Brady asks Kristin to marry him. Kristin wonders what changed Brady's mind.  Maybe his brain cell momentarily deactivated. #DAYS

 

Nick and Gabi are moving in with Maggie?  What... did they run out of room at the DiMera mansion? #DAYS

 

Eric reminds us about Christ's first miracle.  What would be a miracle is if I could stay awake through this show. #DAYS

 

Nicole vows not to let Chloe use the church for her sinful agenda.  Nicole already called dibbs on that. #DAYS

Wasting Time

Jennifer: "Can we talk?" Daniel: "Talk first, slap later?" YES, DANIEL, SLAP HER SILLY! #DAYS

 

With all the people moving into the DiMera mansion I guess they're trimming the show down to a single set. #DAYS

 

Daniel: "This isn't about Chloe or me." Jennifer: "What is it about?" Wasting time. #DAYS

 

Kristin: "What's going on?" Brady: "Nothing you can't fix... right here... right now..."  Not in the foyer, guys. #DAYS

Worthless Crap

Chloe says Nancy has to stop buying worthless crap on The Shopping Channel. Yeah, and watching worthless crap on NBC. #DAYS

 

Nancy says Chloe's love for Daniel has addled her brain.  Can't be. Scientists have proven a vacuum can't be addled. #DAYS

 

Jennifer thinks Abby is too nice to kill Chloe. But not too nice to stalk Austin and try to ruin his life. #HappyMedium #DAYS

 

Daniel tells Maggie, "I don't want to have this conversation." I'll bet Maggie hears that a lot. #DAYS

 

Jennifer asks if she and Daniel can talk. Daniel: "Like... talk first slap later?" Good one, Daniel. #DAYS

Beware The Ides Of March

Brady asks how Marlena is doing. She says she's about the same.  I guess that means she's still crazier than all her patients. #DAYS

 

Nick: "March 15... the day I marry the love of my life." Beware the Ides of March, Nick. #DAYS

 

Something Old: A picture of Kate. New: Unpredictable storylines. Borrowed: Past plots. Blue: Rafe chokes Nick. #DAYS

 

Preacher: "Do you Nicholas take Gabriella to be your lawfully wedded wife in spite of her Olive Oyl hairdo?" #DAYS

Worry, Will, Worry

Sami: "I'm glad you answered the phone." Will: "I wasn't thinking clearly." Good one, Will. #DAYS

 

Sami tells Will not to worry, because she's got everything handled. Worry, Will, worry. #DAYS

 

John wads up the paper with Kristin's picture. Yeah, that'll teach her... if you're into voodoo. #DAYS

 

Sami spews fire because EJ didn't tell her about Stefano returning. Easy come, easy go, Ejamis. #DAYS

 

Kate says Rafe is either the bravest guy ever or a complete fool. So, you already know what I would say about that. #DAYS

 

Holy cow. If any more people move into the mansion, they'll have to rename it the DiMera Hilton... or the Quantico Marine barracks. #DAYS

A Glass Jaw

Jennifer says she never wants to talk to Daniel again. Quit while you're ahead, Daniel. #DAYS

 

After the slap, Daniel says Jennifer is small but surprisingly strong. Or, on the other hand, a certain Salem doctor has a glass jaw. #DAYS

 

Daniel decides to call Jennifer to straighten things out. Careful, Daniel, Jennifer might have the new Teleslap App on her iPhone. #DAYS

 

Chloe says she cares about Daniel and doesn't want him to suffer. Maybe it's true and that's why she's trying to get Jen away from him #DAYS

When Vacuums Collide

Brady thinks Stefano and he understand each other. Yeah, in the sense that "understand" means "hate." #DAYS

 

EJ takes a picture of Kristin, Stefano and Brady for his new screen saver.  Oh, EJ, screen savers are so '90s. #DAYS

 

Chloe tells Jennifer, "It's not what it looks like." If you think about it, for once, that's really true. #DAYS

 

Rafe and Lucas stand there matching wits. WHEN VACUUMS COLLIDE... #DAYS

Follyanna

Oh, good, Jennifer's on today. I didn't think I could go another day without seeing Follyanna. #DAYS

 

Victor says Brady is going to the bowels of hell. That would be a step up from Salem. #DAYS

 

Ciara's drawing probably says "Nicole loves Eric" and the dimwit still doesn't get it. #DAYS

 

Chloe says she can give Daniel unconditional love. And I'm sure she can get a bunch of guys to vouch for that. #DAYS

 

Peripatetic John returns. Pair-o'-pathetic people Brady and Kristin greet him. #DAYS

Sami And EJ's Chain-Romp

Once a king always a king but for EJAMI, once a night isn't enough.

Forbidden Fruit

It seems the thought of murdering someone really lights the fires of passion for Sami and EJ. That's normal, right? #DAYS

 

Chloe wonders what the attraction is at the church for Nicole.  Forbidden fruit. #DAYS

 

Vargas is saying all the right things to Eric.  We all know he'll get out and go full-blown-creepo on us. #DAYS

 

Nick vows to provide Will's girl with a good home. The way he's acting that would be Jeffrey Dahmer's home. #DAYS

 

EJ wants to know how grateful Sami would be for his help. If Sami gets any more grateful she'll wear the poor guy out. #DAYS

Daniel's Options

The Prevuze unabashed dictionary defines "nanosecond" as the amount of time Daniel would remain celibate. 

A One-Way Ticket To Freakytown

So Kate stayed with Rafe all night.  Doesn't she charge more for over-nighters? #DAYS

 

Sami goes to Eric to talk and then tells him she can't talk about it.  Don't worry. Sami always talks about it. #DAYS

 

IMHO Nick and Gabi have the chemistry of oil and water. #DAYS

 

Nick says being freaked out is hard to come back from.  Especially when, like Nick, you've only got a one-way ticket to Freakytown. #DAYS

 

Nick says prison is in his past. Translation: That's true in the context where "past" means "future." #DAYS

Another Milestone For The Virgin Abby

 

Cruel And Unusual Punishment

Go ahead Daniel, take a break from Jennifer.  God knows the viewers would like to. #DAYS

 

Could Will get off on the technicality that it was actually another actor that shot EJ? #DAYS

 

Homeland security has moved Nick's Spooky-Freaky level to orange. #DAYS

 

The Supreme Court has ruled showing Daniel and Jennifer scenes is illegal in that it constitutes cruel and unusual punishment. #DAYS

Dan The Man With The Roamin' Hands

Maybe Chloe's insurance doesn't cover groping.

The "Awkward Factor"

Eric proves when you become a priest you get your collar, pin and clerical outfit, but you don't get a clue. #DAYS

 

Fashion statement: Jen's stockings look like she laid down in the street and tires with ugly tread ran over her knees. #DAYS

 

Chloe says she came up with a brilliant idea. To Chloe, a brilliant idea would be figuring out she should run from a burning building. #DAYS

 

Chloe tells Daniel she wants to keep the "awkward factor" low. We're way past that point. #DAYS

 

Did you notice when Daniel told Parker he's precious the kid tried to get down and Daniel put him in a hammer lock? #DAYS