Sharp As A Rubber Butter Knife

Rafe to Jordan: "Any idea how cyanide got into my cupcake?" Since Jordan made the cupcakes, Rafe once again has trouble putting two and two together. #DAYS

Rafe is suffering from cyanide poisioning. JJ: "Something's bothering you. I can tell." Sharp as a rubber butter knife, that JJ. #DAYS

Just what makes Marlena think she has to search Hope/Gina's purse? Oh, that's right, she's Marlena. #DAYS

Ben's technique, pounding on an unconscious person's back and yelling "wake up" worked because he learned it from the standard protocol at Salem Hospital. #DAYS

Sarah: "Xander is my good friend." Eric: "Since when?" Since the night they spent together and got very, very friendly. #DAYS

Xander's costume is of a neanderthal who shaves his upper chest and shoulders. #DAYS

The Corner Of Wacko Street and Nutjob Avenue. #DAYS

Ciara: "Jordan's cupcakes must have some secret ingredient." Probably Cyanide. #DAYS

Gabi ramps Julie's heart into overdrive. Lani: "You can't be serious." Gabi: "I'm as serious as a heart attack." See what they did there? #DAYS

Ben: "I think Jordan has turned a corner." Yeah, the corner of Wacko Street and Nutjob Avenue. #DAYS

So, basically, even Jordan's non-poisonous cupcakes were as unhealthy as the poisonous one. #DAYS

 

 

Cupcake Alert

Yesterdat's show started with practically everyone in a prone position. Eli and Lani, Jennifer, Ben and, of course Stefan. #DAYS

Jordan finds out David didn't eat the poison cupcake, "Thank God! Thank God!" Honey, I'm pretty sure God isn't part of your murderous plot. #DAYS

This is truly the weirdest funeral I've ever seen. #DAYS

BULLETIN: The FDA has issued a cupcake alert until we can figure out who ate which cupcake. #DAYS

OK, so Lani needs to play nice with Gabi, Tell Kayla what's going on and Kayla gets Julie back into surgery to replace the pacemaker with a non-Dimera tainted one. #DAYS

Gabi: "You saw JJ and I together so you pranced over to Eli and got pregnant." Lani: "No… it wasn't like that." Actually, it was exactly like that. #DAYS

A Blast From The Past

 

 

Clark Kent and Superman

BULLETIN: Will and Sonny are the same person… kind of like Clark Kent and Superman, only you can see them both at the same time. #DAYS

Lani and Eli sample a myriad pieces of cake to decide which one they want for the wedding. YOU WANT FRICKIN' WEDDING CAKE. #DAYS

50 Shades of Dull

Jack and Jen are moving to the next chapter in their lives. It must be a chapter in the book "50 Shades of Dull." #DAYS

Roman promises Hope a serving of his best bubbly. Translation: He'll go to the wine celler and vigorously shake a bottle of Boone's Farm. #DAYS

 

 

A Las Vegas Quickie Divorce

Scenes we'd like to see: Jack and Jen run off so he can get a Las Vegas quickie divorce then they get married in an Elvis chapel. #DAYS

If Rolf truly has a compound that can bring people back from the dead or bring amnesiac's memory back, he could make a fortune for Titan, making Xander look pretty smart for giving him a lab. #DAYS

Romp First, Talk Later

Jordan and Ben are like oil and water. Or, to be specific, a wigged-out attempted murderess vs. a crazed serial killer. #DAYS

Eric tells Nicole they should talk first before they romp. Guy Manual: "Romp first, talk later." #DAYS

You knew what Sarah kept from Maggie wasn't the pregnancy. It was either that she was leaving town or that she put the forks and knives on the wrong side of the table at last night's dinner. #DAYS

Jordan: "Life is short." It certainly is, especially the way they SORAS people on #DAYS.

The Same Philosophy As My Cat

Get it together, Gabi. This is #DOOL. You in Stefan would have been headed for a divorce within a year if he had lived. #DAYS

Kate sneaks out of the hospital avoiding continued room charges, but incurring Salem Hospital's #1,000 Sneak-Out fee. #DAYS

Hope's mind is slowly drifting away. Kind of like me watching this episode. #DAYS

Gabi fumes over Eli and Lani's happiness. She must have the same philosophy as my cat: "If I ain't happy, ain't nobody gonna be happy." #DAYS

1-800-HELLFIRE

 

 

Making Threats and Throwing Tantrums

Kate must be getting much better she's making threats and throwing tantrums from her hospital bed. #DAYS

Kristen to Xander: "You are not good at thinking far ahead." Far ahead being about a nanosecond. #DAYS

Anna: "I want to take care of you." Tony: "I want to take care of you." Am I the only one who can see a compromise here?" #DAYS

The Agony and the Ecstasy

 

 

What She Will Miss Most

 

Executioner

 

 

Gratuitous

Nice closeup of Xander's six-pack. Nothing gratuitous about that. #DAYS

Xander kisses Sarah. Sarah immediately pushes him away. And by immediate I mean five minutes later. #DAYS

Everyone is rushing to do the transplant.  Have they even done the tests to see if Stefan's heart is compatible?  Salem Hospital, where medical realities go to die. #DAYS

The fact that Julie will be beholden to Gabi, of all people, for saving her life may just kill her anyway.  LOL #DAYS  

Chickens Coming Home To Roost

Victor thinks it's insane Kristen is moving in. Well, consider who invited her. #DAYS

To recap: Gabi hated Stefan. Concocted having a fling with him to trap him into marrying her so she could take him for everything. Married him. Magically fell in love. Now devastated. Just your average run-of-the-mill love story. #DAYS

If Gabi lets Julie die she won't be winning Salem's Miss Congeniality contest this year. #DAYS

Rolf reminds Hope what she did to Stefano. Hope has enough more chickens coming home to roost than the Colonel at KFC. #DAYS

What Could Go Wrong?

Brady is moving Kristen into the mansion. What could go wrong? #DAYS

Ben could really screw Victor if he was wearing a wire. #DAYS

 

 

Nail Polish Crisis

 

One Zipper Flaw Away From A Wardrobe Malfunction

Doug: "Is there any chance Julie will come out of her coma?" Kayla: "Only if Dr. Rolf wanders in here." #DAYS

Victor: "Being involved with a DiMera can only end in disaster…" As he tosses a look at Brady. #DAYS

One day after learning she's pregnant, Kristen already has a baby bump. Fetus SORAStus. #DAYS

Kristen is one zipper flaw away from a wardrobe malfunction. #DAYS

 

 

Stefan Is Brain Dead

 

 

Peanut Butter and Bacon Sandwiches

Inspired by yesterday's show, today's lunch at the Prevuze Compound is:
PEANUT BUTTER AND BACON SANDWICHES!

More people might survive at Salem Hospital if it had an emergency room.
#DAYS

He Can Read Her Mind

Jordan: "I have dinner all ready and warming in the oven." And apparently Rafe has lost his sense of smell." #DAYS

Rafe to Jordan: "Cookin' like this you'll have to move in permanently." Gee, he can read her mind. #DAYS

Jordan: "The Brady pub parking lot is not well-lit. I could barely see Ciara when I gunned the car." #DAYS

Apparently Stefan reads texts in the heat of passion. #DAYS

Nip and Tuck vs. Slash and Burn

Jordan might need plastic surgery to correct her plastic surgery. #DAYS

A Day Without Sunshine

A day without Kristen's yellow dress is like a day without sunshine. #DAYS

 

Half Credit

Things you will only hear on #DOOL, "You've been a nuisance ever since I brought you back to life." #DAYS

Eric gives a prayer for Julie. Unfortunately defrocked priests only get half credit for their prayers. #DAYS

Sarah: "I ran a pregnancy test for Kristen." So much for doctor-patient confidentiality." #DAYS

Sunshine The Hooker

Doug: "Why are they taking so long to prepare my precious Julie for surgery." Sorry, Doug. They're not preparing her for surgery. They're embalming her. #DAYS

Scenes we'd like to see: Stefan offers to take Gabi anywhere in the world for their honeymoon. Gabi picks Gnawbone, Indiana. #DAYS

Jack compares the lump on his head to the one he got when he fell off a ladder decorating a Christmas tree. What about the one he got in a 60-story elevator drop? #DAYS

Kristen is either going as the Yellow Submarine or Sunshine the hooker for Halloween. #DAYS