Soooo Ready To See Her Naked

 

 

The Chemistry Of Diet Coke And Mentos

The brewing Eric-Sarah-Rex-Nicole love triangle will confuse geometry experts everywhere. #DAYS

Black Hole Messier 87. Also known as the main server in the DiMera Mansion Security System. #DAYS

Rafe: "I don't like taking my pain meds because they make me loopy." How could anyone tell?" #DA

Sheila and Abe are not a fit. They have the chemistry of Diet Coke and Mentos. #DAYS

A Tall, Dark Strangler

 

 

Trying To Burn More Than A Candle At Both Ends

BULLETIN: With Nicole's return, Days of Our Lives breaks the television record for the number of people returning from the dead. The previous record was held by Days of Our Lives. #DAYS

Maggie to Kate: "You can't maneuver your way into my husband's life or company." Victor hired her. She already has. #DAYS

Gabi in the morning; Chloe in the evening; Seems like Stefan is trying to burn more than a candle at both ends. #DAYS

Stefan and Chloe's arrangement is backwards. Most couples start living together after their first date. #DAYS

A Bottle Of Viagra And A Caterpillar Crane

Chloe finds Gabi's ripped off button, sees Gabi and Stefan come down still getting dressed and buys their lame excuse. The lights are on but nobody's home. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Will: "I don't think a chipper attitude will change the results of my biopsy." Roman: "A chipper attitude is better than a Salem doctor." #DAYS

Victor asks if Maggie is jealous of Kate. She shouldn't be. At his age Victor probably couldn't get it up with a bottle of Viagra and a Caterpillar Crane. #DAYS

What's Wrong With These Crazy Women?

 

 

No Protection... No Problem

 

 

Her Walk Of Shame

Bringing you up to date since the last episode: Jack and Eve have finally done the deed. Stefan and Gabi have also done the deed. Seems seems like there's a lot of deed doing going around. #DAYS

Things are falling apart with Stefan and Gabi hasn't even taken her walk of shame yet. #DAYS

Maggie to Brady: "Someday, someone will be incredibly happy to find you." She must be talking about a puppy. #DAYS

In Flagrante Delicto

Stefan: "If you don't get this done you'll be flipping burgers in Baraboo, Wisconsin tomorrow." Fun fact: Baraboo is the home of the Ringling Brothers. It's the only town in the country that has more clowns than the Salem Police Department. #DAYS

Lani walks in on Stefan and Gabi in flagrante delicto. A lock company could make a fortune in Salem… if locks were legal there, that is. #DAYS

Ted to Kate: "You're not exactly a beacon of moral rectitude." Kate isn't even a dying ember of moral rectitude. #DAYS

Chloe Rips Him A New One

Brady comforts Chloe after helping to save her life. Chloe rips him a new one. #DAYS

Chloe to Brady: "You're trying to mark your territory. I'm not yours to mark." There's an image I want to get our of my mind as quickly as possible. #DAYS

Two Words

Rafe with David: "I have no idea what I'm doing." #DOOL stereotypes – women are wimps and men can't handle newborns. Of course, in Rafe's case, it's probably true. #DAYS

Ted to Hope: "I know you would never break your marriage vows." Two words: Patrick Lockhart. #DAYS

Protip for ruthless killers: Just shoot. Don't carry on a long winded conversation and give the good guys a chance to turn the tables on you. #DAYS

Brady to Chloe: "It's over. It's over." Yeah, as if the El Fideo organization doesn't have more guys to send after her. #DAYS

Get Off The Stage, Kid

Brady: "I feel a big, big wind coming on." I guess he's going to keep talking. #DAYS

Chloe lets Holly go play with Lacey. Translation: "Get off the stage, kid." #DAYS

Stefan to Gabi: "I would not sleep with you if you were the last woman on earth." Note from the authors of the Guy Manual – Yes, he would. #DAYS

Sarah wonders why Eric won't be Rex' best man. For one thing, wedding photographers make a lot more money. #DAYS

Sending Signals

According to the Guy Manual Sarah may have forgiven Rex, but she hasn't given up the right to throw it up in his face for the rest of his life. #DAYS

Gabi: "I think the two of us could use some hot, no-strings sex." I'm not sure, Stefan, but I think she's sending you signals. #DAYS

Crazy Ben Strikes Again

 

 

Ben is Gay

Ben to Ciara: "You could spend the night here." How thoughtful, Ben. #DAYS

If Ben didn't realize Ciara meant "share the bed" he wasn't on the same page as all the viewers. #DAYS

In the heat of passion with Ciara, Ben takes a phone call. OK. Ben is gay. #DAYS

Wearing White and Picking Winners

 

 

Chicago Black Sox

We could have saved some time if JJ had lipstick all over his face. #DAYS

Eve insists she and Jack are a team. They are… and just as corrupt as the 1919 Chicago "Black" Sox. #DAYS

Two Choices

If Rafe was any dumber they'd have to water him. #DAYS

Maybe Jack getting hit will get his memory back. That's the way I fix my computer. #DAYS

Eve now has two choices: 1) Immediately turn in Claire or 2) Accessory after the fact. #DAYS

Weenies and Klutzes

Jack to Eve: "You're not wearing white." That's no surprised but I'm shocked she also doesn't have a big red "A" on her blouse. #DAYS

Marlena to Jennifer: "If you ever want to talk..." Standard rates apply. #DAYS

Rafe stumbles with David. It's a scene compliant with the #DOOL Rule women are weenies in fights and men are klutzes with babies. #DAYS

If a doctor told Rafe he had a small mass in his head he would be speaking of his brain. #DAYS

You can't blame Ted for chasing Hope. There are only about a dozen women in Salem. #DAYS

Hope: "Rafe wants to be everyone's rock." He's got the brain for it. #DAYS

Female Spiders That Devour Their Mates

Whoa… Abe almost pulls a Joe Biden on Sheila. #DAYS

Ted is smitten with Hope. Why do I keep thinking of those female spiders that devour their mates? #DAYS

Jack stands there looking like a dork and wondering if Shane owns a shotgun. #DAYS

Eve is pretty good at reeling Claire in. Not as good as she was with JJ, however. #DAYS

A Big Gulp

Maggie: "I don't like Sarah marrying a cheater." Who are you married to, Maggie? #DAYS

Stefan: "You're going to blame the incompetence of the SPD on me?" Might as well, the SPD has enough incompetence to go around." #DAYS

Brady to Gabi: "You've already laid the seeds." And I think Brady is looking those seeds to yield a crop of wild oats.

Abe: "Hope and I are more than employer and employee." Yeah, you're practically family since you have her dead son's eyes. #DAYS

"I am agent Laverne Smith and I don't believe in fairy tales." In that case, she must have a tough time living in Salem. #DAYS

Ciara: "I promise everything is going to be OK." Translation: Everything is going down the tubes like a toilet with a power flush. #DAYS

Abe plays the race card. Jack plays the ignorant card. #DAYS

Jennifer drops the bomb that the Spectator will be endorsing Abe. That and a 7-11 gift card will get Abe a Big Gulp. #DAYS

Claire: "I'm just the dumped ex." I have a feeling Claire should get used to saying that. #DAYS

Full Naked

Chloe is half-naked and Stefan is half-naked. Do two half-nakeds make a full-naked? #DAYS

I wonder who's paying for Will's hospital stay. This show always seems to divorce the drama of being in a hospital from the reality that it's really expensive. #DAYS

Significant Other of the Year.

Rafe, always slow on the uptake, fails to ask Jordan the critical question, "Who's the daddy?" #DAYS

Jordan asks Rafe to go get her son and bring him back to her… right after she said there was no way she wanted that baby in Salem. Inconsistency is the hobgoblin of little minds. #DAYS

Tripp: "I can't back out. Our engagement is all over social media." Since when is social media the law of the land?" #DAYS

Rafe and Tripp aren't exactly going to be the leading candidates for Significant Other of the Year. #DAYS