Life In A Monastery

We started the show with Melanie in bed with the love of her life.  In other words, she was in bed alone. #DAYS

 

Man, Nick gets more visitors than the old Prevuze blog website, which was pretty popular if I do say so myself. #DAYS

 

I just realized Every time Brady gets ready to tie the knot, the girl dies. This is known as the "Little Joe Cartwright Syndrome." #DAYS

 

Maggie assures Dan that Victor will agree to letting Nicole stay. Translation: Otherwise he'd better get used to life in a monastery. #DAYS

The Biggest Tease Since Gypsy Rose Lee

Did I call that shot about Sami stopping EJ's advances? Did I? HUH? HUH? She is the biggest tease since Gypsy Rose Lee. #DAYS

 

Sami says she can't just turn around and jump into something with EJ. That something, apparently, is a bed. #DAYS

 

Victor nervously tells Sonny his young man friend looks nice. Translation: Victor attempts to remain open minded as reality sinks in. #DAYS

 

Brady approaches Victor about running Titan. Well, heck, it's a tough job market, so he has to settle for president. #DAYS

Less Used By You Than Any Man I've Been With

Nick looks like those pictures of the pathetic cons in the 1930s right before they shaved their heads and fried them. #DAYS

 

Morose, laconic, self-pitying Nick.  Oh, yeah, he'll do really well out of prison on his own. #DAYS

 

Nicole to Daniel: "I feel less used by you than any man I've ever been with." What a resounding endorsement! #DAYS

Go To Your Neutral Corners And Grow Up

Nick says you learn in prison not to show how you feel... while he throws a tantrum. #DAYS

 

Rafe to Nicole and Sami: "Why don't you two just go to your neutral corners and... grow up." Good one, Rafe. #DAYS

 

Melanie has a headache.  If that doesn't turn into a Midol product placement her brain tumor is probably already inoperable. #DAYS

 

If Lucas doesn't dump Sami for good he might as well just cut 'em off, fry 'em up and have a rocky mountain oyster festival. #DAYS

 

Nicole: "What I feel for you is more than just gratitude." That's guy code for "run like a grizzly is snappin' at your ass." #DAYS

Accidental Sex

Well, it seems Will and Gabi have "accidentally" had sex. Just like Sami and EJ. Maybe it's hereditary – a recessive gene no doubt. #DAYS

 

As @CPInsane91 pointed out to me, even gay Will gets more women than poor Roman. #DAYS

 

Nicole brings Jennifer flowers. Beware of freaks bearing gifts, Jen. #DAYS

 

Rafe wonders if EJ can't be more original than coming up with a double for Stefano. EJ, yes... the writers, no. #DAYS

 

Gabi: "OMG! What have I done?" Say it with me... Will. #DAYS

Don't Shag The Guy Next To The Scones

To recap: CHAD'S FOOT --> GABI'S BUTT --> CURB. #DAYS

 

Nice shot, Sami.  I see you graduated from the Hope Brady Marksmanship Academy. #DAYS

 

"Don't shag the guy next to the scones, you might make a customer throw up." Move over Shakespeare, T's back in town. #DAYS

 

Will isn't using protection but according to Todd Akin, Gabi can't get pregnant - her body shuts down doing it with a gay guy. #DAYS

Passive-Aggressive Blame-Shifting Egomaniac

Rafe says he caught Sami trying to run out like an idiot. I guess she does kind of run like Rafe. #DAYS

 

Daniel assures Nicole he's in it with her all the way.  Until the poop hits the fan, that is. #DAYS

 

Sami says Rafe is a passive-aggressive, blame-shifting egomaniac. I guess it really does take one to call one. #DAYS

Selfish, Deluded, Dangerous

Can anyone tell me what the hell that is supposed to be on Will's shirt? #DAYS

 

Sami calls Rafe a jackass. An insult to jackasses everywhere. #DAYS

 

Let me get this straight — after her couch calisthenics with EJ, Sami accuses Rafe the-mad-kisser of the ultimate betrayal? #DAYS

 

Chad says Gabi is the most selfish, deluded, dangerous person he has ever met. That's scary, since he knows Melanie. #DAYS

Sami The Tease Strikes Again

Dr. Daniel spends the episode with Nicole. Where else would he be with half the town bloody and injured? #DAYS

 

"EJ, we have to stop." Sami the tease strikes again. #DAYS

 

Yes, Lucas, Sami ran off with EJ. You either have to give up on her or your practically non-existent, PW'd, withered pair of nads. #DAYS

 

Sami: "Nothing is ever easy." You usually are, Sami. #DAYS

 

EJ wants to pick up where they left off when he returns.  Life is short, EJ. Have dessert first. #DAYS

Next Best Thing To A Full-Blown Catfight

Daniel says doctors don't know everything.  In Salem, they don't know their butts from a hole in the ground. #DAYS

 

Silvio brought a computer so Sami and EJ can surf the web... and read the Prevuze comments. #DAYS

 

Ian and Kate going a couple rounds was the next best thing to a full-blown catfight. #DAYS

Pal

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. And that's a picnic compared to Kate scorned. #DAYS

 

Abby: Making women everywhere proud... of their ability to snivel, cower and blubber. #DAYS

 

According to my count, John used the term "Pal" 217 times in this episode. I think that's a record. http://bit.ly/K6v9q6 #DAYS

 

When they find Jack, it will prove something I've thought all along... that he's pretty much a two-dimensional character. #DAYS