The Love of Her Life Du Jour

Johnny and Chanel are so giddy over the results of our checkup it's almost inevitable this is all headed for disaster. #DAYS

Chad informs Cat he has signed a pre-non-nupital agreement. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe: "Stefano DiMera is dead." Kate: "I've known that for a long time. I slept with him before Viagra was around." #DAYS

The plan is to go public with an announcement that Stephanie and Alex are planning to elope. If you publicly announce you're going to elope, is that really eloping? #DAYS
 
Next on #DOOL — Stephanie: "I'm kicking myself that I can't go back to my younger self and not get involved with Jeremy." Jada: "I'm kicking myself, too." Stephanie: "When were you involved with Jeremy?" #DAYS

Stephanie to Alex: "You're everything to me." Translation: He's the love of her life du jour. #DAYS

Jimmy Hoffa

Rolf might have better success reviving dead bodies than reviving, as Gwen put it, her "bloody bank account." #DAYS

Johnny to Chanel: "What did Dr. Horton say about stress." Probably that it's stressful. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gwen: "If EJ murders me, you can bring me back to life, can't you?" Rolf: "Let's put it this way… "can" and "want to" are two different things." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Shane reveals the identity of the bones in the DiMera crypt. EJ: "Huh? Who is Jimmy Hoffa?" #DAYS

IPs and URLs and XKEs

Julie: "I'm not a woman who takes a cat nap when I'm stressed." Drinking a fifth of whiskey is a lot more effective. #DAYS

Jeremy is worried about never being able to teach again. As a fall-back he could also return to running a fly-by-night airline. #DAYS

If Jeremy comes anywhere near me he will be sorry. Maybe Stephanie is more of a threat to Jeremy than he is to her. #DAYS

Julie: "I don't know about IPs and URLs and XKEs." I can understand if she doesn't know technical jargon, but it's a shame she doesn't know about a classic Jaguar automobile. #DAYS

♫♪ Phillip’s Gonna Get Some ♫♪

Alex: "I just heard Xander sacked Brady." Phillip: "I guess word travels slow when you're working from home." OH,SNAP! #DAYS

Theo picks up on JJ's reaction to Gabi having a date with Phillip. The painkillers Theo is getting don't seem to be affecting his ability to think. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Stephanie: "Whenever someone gets within ten feet of me I just want to jump out of my skin." Steve: "From what I've seen whenever Alex gets within ten feet of you, you want to jump right out of your clothes." #DAYS

Steve: "Thanks to Bo and hope it won't be long until we can find out who owns that website." Thanks to https://www.whois.com/whois/ you can find it out in fifteen seconds. #DAYS

Julie: "Does the fact you're leaving town have anything to do with Alex Kiriakis?" Jeremy: "It has to do with the fact Stephanie is with Alex Kiriakis." #DAYS

Gabi: "I'm sorry I keep going on and on about my probably-dead ex Stefan." In Salem "probably-dead" and "alive-and-well" pretty much mean the same thing. #DAYS

♫♪ Phillip's gonna get some… Phillip's gonna get some… ♫♪ #DAYS

The Stick Up Her Ass

Jeremy has turned into quite the counselor. #DAYS

Jennifer: "Chad, we love you." All we want to do is yank your kids away from you. #DAYS

Agnes: "Mr. Devereaux, we'd like to hear more from you." That makes one of us. #DAYS

Jennifer might be more comfortable if she removed the stick up her ass. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL Chad: "I have a plan. I'm not giving up custody of my kids." Agnes: "Do you and Jennifer have a plan?" Jack: "Certainly. Thomas mows the yard and Charlotte does the laundry." #DAYS

A Relationship Wrecking Strumpet

Dr. Gregory thinks there are things to be said between Holly and Sophia. True. Holly has not yet called Sophia a relationship wrecking strumpet and Sophia has not told Holly she is a skanky boyfriend stealing pyromaniac. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Priest: "Have you chosen godparents for your child?" Chanel: "Yes Javi Hernandez and Leo Stark." Priest: "Those bums?" #DAYS

If that kid playing Trey isn't a member of the Screen Actor's Guild there's going to be trouble. #DAYS

Marlena: "I can't believe John isn't going to come walking through the door." The way they come back from the dead on this show, he might. #DAYS

Disdain, Bickering, and No Sex

Next on #DOOL — Javi: "My dad failed his stress test." Gabi: "He should have studied harder." #DAYS

Leo wants Gwen to make Dimitri disappear again. If I were Gwen I'd ask for Leo to define "disappear." #DAYS

Maybe Chanel isn't having morning sickness. Maybe she just had lunch at the pub. #DAYS

Disdain for each other, bickering, and no sex. You'd almost think Gwen and Leo were married. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Javi: "I have to leave town." Johnny: "Javi good trip." #DAYS