A Salem Minute

Next on #DOOL — JJ: "I'm surprised you're taking the class I'm teaching." Holly: "I'm over the crush I had on you. I just hope you spank your students when they are naughty." #DAYS

No competent prison would let an unaccompanied little girl in to visit her mom. Rachel got in because the key word was competent and this is Salem. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sophia: "I wish there was a way to make things up to you." Tate: "There is… even though I'm with Holly, I may be looking for a sidepiece." #DAYS

Rachel: "Are you in trouble?" Kristen: "No. I've only been sentenced to prison because I'm such a good person." #DAYS

Kristen to Rachel: "You can't stay here in the prison." She'll have her own little slammer when they find our who really shot EJ. #DAYS

If Rachel tells Tate the truth about the baby it'll be all over town in a New York minute. Actually… a Salem minute. #DAYS

Infidelity

Theo stares ominously at JJ's badge. Not to worry, Theo. He's a Salem cop. He's lucky he could figure out how to pin the badge on. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Maggie: "If you and Tate spent the night together I have to ask… are you still a virgin?" Holly: "I am today." Maggie: "What does that mean?" Holly: "I've never had sex on a Wednesday." #DAYS

Julie: "Time goes quickly for some, slowly for others." Apparently Julie has been doing some reading about Einstein's theory of relativity. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Shawn: "Theo was cheating on Claire." Belle: "I guess infidelity runs in our family." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Julie: "I'm going to keep Doug in my heart… and my vibrator in my nightstand." #DAYS

Marlena: "By the time Kristen is out of prison she will have missed almost all of Rachel's childhood." Every cloud has a silver lining. #DAYS

Abe to Theo: "Stay with us. We have lots of space." But the Salem Inn has all that privacy. #DAYS

Celibacy Sucks

Apparently there is an entire wing of Salem Hospital they haven't been using. Geez, if they would open that up they could handle more than one patient at a time. #DAYS

Xander: "I can't forgive Sarah. The betrayal was too great." Looks like it's time for another session with Marlena. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Alex: "Can I interrupt you while you're writing?" Stephanie: "God no! The main character in my next book is about to lose her virginity." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Alex: "Let's celebrate your book's success by doing what your main character did on page 87." Stephanie: "EJ wants me to meet him ASAP." Alex: "I can be quick." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "When it comes to you and Cat, how do you feel?" Chad: "I feel… that celibacy sucks." #DAYS

Stephanie: "This hospital is steeped in tradition." And they have the bodies of their former patients to prove it. #DAYS

Alex: "Somebody bugged Phillip and Xander's office." Stephanie: "You mean like they put in a listening device." Well, he's not talking about infesting it with cockroaches. #DAYS

Freak-Out

Phillip to Xander: "Let's not freak out just yet." With those two, a freak-out is always pending. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gwen: "You want advice on how to handle EJ. I can't help you. I hardly know the man." Cat: "I realize that but knowing you, you'll be in bed with him soon." #DAYS

Jen asks Charlotte how her first day of kindergarten went. It, of course went well. At the end of the school year, Charlotte will leave town and come back in the fall ready for high school. #DAYS

Jennifer: "We need to be here in Salem to keep an eye on Cat Green." Then you will have something in common with Chad, because he definitely has an eye on Cat Green. #DAYS

A House Where People Hate Me

Johnny: "DiMera encourages their employees to get involved in the community." Sometimes even in legal activities. #DAYS

Jeez, Xander, Phillip is offering you his resignation on a silver platter. Getting rid of him is what you've wanted, so stop arguing and grab it. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "Are you alone right now?" Marlena: "No… you're with me." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sophia: "How did moving onto the dorms go?" Tate: "It was educational. I learned two people can fit in a twin bed." #DAYS

Gwen: "Why would I want to be in a house where people hate me?" Maybe it's the only way you could ever be inside a house. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jack: "Semper Familia." Patch: "I didn't know you spoke French." #DAYS

Sex In A Twin Bed

Scenes we'd like to see: Chad and Cat get married and on their 50th anniversary decide it's finally time to have sex, only to discover the Salem Pharmacy is out of Viagra. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Maggie: "Going to college will be a wonderful adventure for you. Some people say you go to college to lose your virginity." Holly: "In that case, I've already graduated." #DAYS

Sophia, Holly, Ari, Javi, and Tate all on campus together. What could go wrong? #DAYS

Tate and Holly train for the newest Olympic event – sex in a twin bed. #DAYS

Oklahoma Joe’s Pulled-Pork Mountain With Extra Sauce

Next on #DOOL — Aaron: "I heard your summer was a little rough." Tate: "It started out great but then we found out she was pregnant." #DAYS

Chad to Cat: "I'm sure you can handle EJ." The way Belle handled him? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Cat: "You mean it wasn't a dream? Did I really kiss you?" Chad: "Yep." Cat: "You mean just a little kiss?" Chad: "Nope. It was as sloppy as an Oklahoma Joe's pulled-pork mountain with extra sauce." #DAYS

If Cat doesn't like the way she got kissed on the miniature golf course, does chad get a mulligan? #DAYS

With that second "first kiss" I'm surprised Chad and Cat didn't jump into the bushes behind them and throw it down right there. I guess since they're taking it slow they'll wait until they get back to Chad's place. #DAYS

Rachael: "I've been standing here long enough to know you and Cat are hogging this hole." I think Chad is interested in another hole. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Marlena: "There was a snake in my bed." Tate: "Who are you hooking up with now?" #DAYS

Chad and Cat prove there is a fine line between love and hate – drawn by two feeble minds and a lame script. #DAYS

Brady and Steve put two and two together. Even though they got five, they're starting to figure out who Sophia's baby is. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Brady: "When was the firehouse baby born." Patch: "The night before the fourth." Brady: "The third?" Patch: "I didn't realize you were a math genius." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Marlena: "What did you see that you weren't supposed to?" Rachael: "Chad and Cat on hole three – K-I-S-S-I-N-G." #DAYS