Chasing Tail

Brady "accidentally" meeting Sarah half naked was the #DOOL gratuitous male nudity scene for December. Females of the hetero persuasion may now remain at ease until January's gratuitous male nudity scene. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Marlena: "You're still wearing your wedding band." Xander: "I'll remove it as soon as I start chasing tail again." #DAYS

Alex: "This tree is a little too sappy." Just like the show? #DAYS

Patch: "I thought coordinating the FBI and Salem Police Department would get us something." It will. It will get the FBI downgraded to the level of the Keystone Cops. #DAY

Jada calls 911: "We have a hazardous materials situation here." A pub chowdah delivery? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "Why didn't you three men overtake that guard?" Theo: "She looked pretty mean." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Susan: "Isn't it a little early to tipple?" Gwen: "Yes, but it's the perfect time to get stinking drunk." #DAYS

When Susan takes her glasses off she has an uncanny resemblance to Kristen. #DAYS

Désastre Romantique

Sarah to Holly: "I can't believe your first semester of college is almost done." And judging by the way that went, by the end of her second semester she may be able to get the whole campus burned down. #DAYS

"The Glove" that stalked Salem years ago has moved up in the world. Now he can afford the other glove and a jacket. #DAYS

Maggie to Holly: "I'm sure you will miss Tate while you're in France." So, Holly, do you know what the French call a long distance relationship… désastre romantique. #DAYS

Come to think of it, if Rachel and Sophia want Buddy's Burgers instead of institutional food, they may be the only sane people in the place. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Alex shows up unexpectedly. He and Stephanie jump into bed, pick a random page in "One Stormy Night", and follow instructions. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Alex: "Where do you see yourself in five years?" Stephanie: "I'll be using Ozempic and lying about my age."

So Many Bedpans

When Jada hugged her, Gabi's ass completely filled my new 75"TV #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Jada (on phone): I'm outside the pub. I need forensics here right now." JJ: "OMG… did someone actually eat the chowdah?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Abe: "So who all are missing?" Jada: "Maybe it would be quicker to give you a list of people in Salem who aren't missing."


Have you noticed that Susan and Kristen have never been seen together? I think Susan may be Clark Kent. #DAYS

EJ to Susan: "I am very busy at the hospital." So many bedpans, so little time. #DAYS

A Little Whine-Ass Grownup

Kristen and Tony are relieved that Chad woke up. They didn't want to be trapped in a crypt with a dead body. That is, other than the half dozen or so that are already in there. #DAYS

Gabi says Theo is understanding and supportive. I knew he wasn't qualified to be the CEO of DiMera. #DAYS

Jennifer to Cat: "You know they're not real, don't you?" What's she talking about? I don't think either of them have had a boob job. #DAYS

EJ tells Thomas he looks like a little grownup. A little whine-ass grownup, if you ask me. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Kristen: "are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Tony: "Yes. Our kidnappers have left us everything we need in here except bathroom faciities." #DAYS

Stoking The Fires Of Hell

Scenes we'd like to see: Sophia and Rachel escape from Bayview unfortunately unaware of the quicksand bog right outside. #DAYS

Holly: "How is Rachel doing?" Tate: "She's in Bayview stoking the fires of hell."

Next on #DOOL — Alex: "Why don't we take this to the bedroom?" Stephanie: "I have to go. My ride will be here any minute." Alex: "That's enough time for me." #DAYS

Tate gets a C- in his film class. It looks like they've got a budding Martin Scores-not-so-easy in Salem.

Cat: "If all this about us being together is true, it's an amazing mystery." EJ: "Let's try to get to the bottom of it together." I have a feeling that's not the only bottom he'd like to get to. #DAYS

Chucky With Pigtails

Sophia looks like demon doll Chucky with pigtails. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Leo: "Did I wake you?" Marlena: "Yes, but only because I was sleeping." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sophia: "Not everything is about you." Holly: "You're right. If it's irrelevant, it's not about me." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rachel: "Did you bring me anything." Tate: "You mean like a toy?" Rachel: "No. I mean like a cake with a file baked into it." #DAYS

A Lobotomy

Belle has something to tell Paulina "in the strictest of confidence." In Salem, the "strictest of confidence" means, "don't put it on more than three or four billboards around town." #DAYS

Brady to Rachel: "This is the adolescent wing of Bayview. There are incorrigible kids just like you all over this place."

Next on #DOOL — Rachel: "Couldn't Grandma be my doctor?" Brady: "Even the best doctors need help. In your case we're going to have to bring in the entire American Psychiatric Association." #DAYS

Gwen to Leo and Javi: "You two are meant for each other. And I hope your conversion therapy fails so you can be together forever." #DAYS

Kayla says they've determined Marlena has a complicated form of Lyme disease… It's the dreaded Lemon-Lyme disease. #DAYS

Rachel whines, "What if I don't get better?" Brady: "Have you heard of something called a lobotomy?" #DAYS