Even Plato Got Horny

Xander suggests if he and Chloe move in together the relationship will be platonic. Right. Even Plato got horny once in a while. #DAYS

Shawn: "I went in there guns blazing like an idiot." What do you mean LIKE and idiot. #DAYS

Hope: "How did I wind up with such stubborn children?" You slept with a stubborn man. Of course in Shawn's case you must have at some point slept with a moron. #DAYS

Here's a quick recap from yesterday: Chloe arrives. Xander opens the door half-naked. Chloe gives Xander an eye-full as she bends over to remove his bandage. They decide to move in together. Draw your own correlation vs. causation conclusions. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Ciara: "OMG! It's Daddy… back from the dead." Hope: "Yes… but he seems to be making a U-Turn." #DAYS

X-Rated Reading

It may be Wednesday but Abe has a case of "the Mondays." #DAYS

EJ and Stefan hire Nicole and Gabi as "consultants." The duties outlined in their consulting contracts must be very interesting X-Rated reading. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sweet Bits stock tanks in the wake of Biscuitgate. #DAYS

Doolsuckus

Chanel to Johnny: "Is something wrong?" It's Salem. Something is always wrong. #DAYS.

…and we continue today's adventure on the exotic Greek Island of Doolsuckus. #DAYS

Shawn's middle name should be "Oops!" #DAYS

Leo: "When did our little patissier break bad?"

If Wendy's dress was any shorter you wouldn't need a plunging neckline to see her cleavage. #DAYS

Bo to Hope: "Nothing can erase our love." That may be true but that wasn't an eraser Shawn fired at you. #DAYS

Showing More Skin

Eric and Nicole frolic in their respective showers and fantasize about each other. Since moving to Peacock the show's increased emphasis on showing more skin may be due to the fact that it saves on their wardrobe budget. #DAYS

Anna: "You spoke to Eric?" Nicole: "Define 'spoke.'" #DAYS

Oh, goodie. Eric and Sloan are going steady. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Sloan: "I don't want to be your booty call any more." Eric: "So you want me the text you instead?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Anna: "It's best to forget our past indulgences." Nicole: "I guess you're right. I've had so many I couldn't remember them all anyway." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Gabi: "I was only with Jake because I wished he was you." Stefan: "Why are you with me?" Gabi: "Because I wish you were Jake." #DAYS

Foreplay

Xander slaps the biscuit away from Chloe: "If you eat that you'll end up in the hospital. Did you not hear the news?" If she had heard the news she wouldn't be eating the biscuit. OTOH, it is Chloe. The biscuit may have a higher IQ. #DAYS

Xander challenges Chloe to another dart match. I've watched enough #DOOL to know going to the dart board again means they are getting together. In fact, a second dart match should be considered foreplay. #DAYS

Rafe isn't in the hospital because he ate the biscuits. He's there because Duke beat the crap out of him. #DAYS

EJ: What's wrong?" Nicole looks at him like a puppy that just ate the Thanksgiving turkey. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Stefan: "Smoking can be hazardous to your health." Trask: "So can rejecting me sexually." #DAYS

Talia: "What did Rafe do when he was under the influence that was so terrible." Jada: "He stopped kissing me." #DAYS

His Intent

Alex: "You got a minute?" Marlena: "Sure… for $500 an hour." #DAYS

Alex says he might be redeemed with Stephanie since Kayla is alive and he didn't rob her of her last chance with her mother. If Marlena is worth her outrageous hourly fee she might want to remind him it was his INTENT that tipped Steph off about what kind of guy he is. #DAYS

John: "Marlena and I really adore Rachael." You're the only ones. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Brady: "I don't have a clue how to change Rachael's nasty behavior toward Chloe." John: "Do you own a paddle?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Alex: "You think therapy can help?" Marlena: "Not really, but it sure is lucrative." #DAYS

Stoned Salem

The drug-laced biscuits kick in. FYI the sequel to Cocaine Bear will be Stoned Salem. #DAYS

Melinda is proof positive some women will believe anything. #DAYS

Rafe goes for the gold with Jada. Shocked Jada pushes him away. Actually it's her fault for letting him imagine her dressed like a two-buck hooker. #DAYS

Li needs a shoeshine. Or, better yet, a new pair of shoes. #DAYS

As the good people of Salem begin to come down from their biscuit-induced highs they begin to realize the biscuits weren't the only things that were baked. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rafe to Jada: "We shouldn't let The Man dictate our lives. Screw the policy… Screw the rules… Come to think of it, screw me." #DAYS

Ex-Lax

Eric gives Sloan the naked truth. Now it looks like she's done getting naked… and that's the truth. #DAYS

Bo: "Get the hell off of me." Steve: "That's what she said." #DAYS

Steve: "Bo Brady would never hurt me." Uhhh… He just got done reminding you how he put your eye out. #DAYS

Gwen: "Wow, Dr. Rolf sure gets around, doesn't he?" Not as much as Gwen does. #DAYS

Chanel: "Leo doesn't reveal his sources." That's what the Mafia calls Omerta. #DAYS

Eric should have gone to Krispy Kreme. #DAYS

So the mystery-substance-laced breakfast biscuits are great, eh? Well, among other things, Strychnine has no flavor. #DAYS

Scenes we'd like to see: The mystery stuff put in the biscuits turns out to be Ex-Lax. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Chloe: "You don't have the right to maul me in public." Xander: "How about in private?" #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — EJ: "I hope one quickie in the basement was worth it." Stefan: "It wasn't a quickie and it was more than one." #DAYS

Piece Offering

Li tells Johnny what he's doing is none of his business. Doesn't he know in Salem everything is everybody's business? #DAYS

EJ hands Nicole a drink: "Peace offering." Nicole sits in a seductive pose: "Piece offering." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Shawn: "I get it. I remind you of my father." Meagan: "No… he had a brain." #DAYS

The Walk Of Shame

Trask: "Sloan is a litigious kind of gal." …checking my thesaurus to see if litigious and promiscuous mean the same thing. #DAYS

Gwen leaves the room where she and Alex had their tryst. It begs the question: Q: When can you tell if Gwen is taking the "walk of shame?" A: When she's walking #DAYS

Note to Jada: Dating your boss – what could go wrong? Note to Rafe: Dating an employee – what could go wrong? #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Li: "You're playing me like I'm an idiot." EJ: "I'm not playing." #DAYS

Rotten Little Brat

In case you're not bilingual, you should know "Rachael" is Portugese for "Rotten Little Brat." #DAYS

Gwen: "Have you even heard of knocking?" Me: Have you ever heard of locking the door? #DAYS

When W.C. Fields said, "I like children. If they're properly cooked." He was speaking specifically of Rachael. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Rachael: "What do you mean Grandma didn't go to heaven? Did she go to the other place?" Brady: "No, but the way you're turning out they've reserved a spot there for you."

Next on #DOOL — Chanel: "Do friends sleep with their friend's girlfriends?" Alex: "I slept with you and your girlfriend and you didn't seem to mind." #DAYS

BULLETIN: Rachael Black has been chosen the "Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child" Poster Girl for 2023. #DAYS

Defrocking

The connection goes bad as Kayla tells Stephanie Bo is alive. How conveeeeeeenient. #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — Nicole: "What does it feel like to be a defrocked priest?" Eric: "It's not nearly as much fun as defrocking Sloan." #DAYS

Next on #DOOL — John: "What are you thinking about?" Marlena: "I wanted more time with Belle and Eric. What are you thinking about?" John: "Getting you into the bedroom and nailing you." #DAYS