Feministic Spunk

We pan in on enough candles at the dock to open a crafts store. EJ strolls, stoops and contemplates a flower.

Monique Parker, wedding guru, and Nicole are at the church planning the wedding. Monique explains it is traditional for seating at a wedding to have a bride's side and a groom's side. Nicole says she thinks that's appropriate. "We should keep them separated. It would be bad luck if the guests all got killed."

Stephanie comes into the apartment. Chelsea is distracted as she tries to assemble a bookshelf. She finally comes up for air and asks Stephanie how it went with Phillip. Stephanie has decided they need each other. Her doubts have vanished. Then she reels off her doubts. She's afraid the DiMeras will hurt Phillip. And his tramp of a girlfriend along with him.

EJ rambles about Tony, "I will avenge your death if it's the last thing I do."

Max steps up, "What if it is the last thing you do? Aren't you getting married tomorrow? Is this how you take care of your family?"

Lucas and Chloe sit at a table in the pub. Lucas wants them to spend every second together. "Sounds great," lies Chloe, "But I do need to squeeze in some time with Daniel here and there." Chloe is concerned about the TV show taking all her time, "This job is not me. I can't host Kate's show."

Monique says, "Nicole, you need to take a deep breath."

"Right," says Nicole, "Since I'm marrying into the DiMera family and lying to them, I may not have many breaths left." She's worried things are going to fall apart. She flashes back to the switcheroo, and then to lecturing Mia, and then to EJ wanting to reevaluate things. She ponders, "I don't know what I'm thinking. My marriage is doomed."

Chloe says she never really wanted the job in the first place. Lucas encourages her to try it and quit if she doesn't like it. Then he gushes over his soon-to-be celebrity wife. They smooch as Daniel walks in. Chloe just about bites off Lucas' tongue.

Monique calls Chloe and asks her to come to the church, "We're in the midst of a serious wedding emergency."

Max and EJ bicker. EJ ignores a call as he insists he didn't start this. Max doesn't think Tony would want his death to cause more fighting.

Chelsea thinks the DiMera and Kiriakis families have always had problems but focusing on the bad things is no way to live. Stephanie wishes there was something else she could do.

Chelsea offers advice, "Just (say it with her) be there for Phillip."

Stephanie has a rare lucid moment, "Actually there is something else!" She bolts.

Chloe arrives at the church. Monique has flown the coop. Nicole asks for forgiveness for making Chloe spend a fortune on a matron of honor dress she probably won't wear, "I didn't ruin things because I told the truth. I ruined them because I lied."

God booms, "I hate to be an old I-told-you-so, but..."

Nicole makes over Sydney. Chloe asks what she meant by that. "I lied to myself," says Nicole, "Every time I got married it was for the money. This time I thought it was different. It was for the money and the hunk. EJ is being a jerk right now."

"What's new about that," asks Chloe, "I thought EJ stood for Everybody's Jerk."

Nicole worries she's marrying a man who isn't totally in love with her. Chloe asks if this is about Sami. "Part of it... yes," admits Nicole.

"Maybe what EJ and Sami had was passionate," says Chloe, "but it wasn't going to last. Love can't be volatile. It should be stable and safe."

"That sounds boring," says Nicole.

A gal in the audience fights falling asleep, "She has no idea what boredom is."

Nicole asks if Chloe has regrets about her marriage, "Are you ready to shoot yourself yet?"

Maggie bumps into Daniel at the pub and says she admires the choice he made about Chloe. She extols his virtues at the hospital, "You're so dedicated. You work long hours and only leave to eat. And that's only because the CDC has declared the hospital cafeteria as the ptomaine poisoning capital of the world."

Modest Daniel says, "I do my part."

Maggie admonishes him, "Do not confuse the Hippocratic oath with celibacy vows."

Daniel asks, "Are you hitting on me?"

Maggie says, "Well, you seem to like 'em my age."

Nicole says that was a joke, "Remember those? Jokes?"

"Certainly," says Chloe, "I'm married to one." Chloe insists she did the Right thing by marrying Loserclueless. She also insists EJ loves Nicole. Nicole ain' so sure. She thinks EJ keeps thinking of what could have been with Sami, "I don't believe Sami's story about the kid."

Chelsea finds EJ and Max at the pier. She insists Tony's death was an accident and he and Stefano have no right to be upset. EJ tells her to go to hell.

Satan screams, "No! I don't want any part of her!"

Chelsea says, "Philip will have to live with his guilt for all the Days Of Our Lives."

EJ says, "LIVE! That's the key word. He will LIVE with his guilt!"

"Well, you can't kill him," says Chelsea, "I mean... he is a robot, isn't he? "

"No," says EJ, "Just bionic. But whatever you're trying to do, stop it."

Max steps in and says don't talk to her like that. EJ doesn't want to talk at all. He stomps off.

Chelsea wonders if Max thinks she came on too strong. Max says he's OK with the way Chelsea handled it. "I'm glad you appreciate my feministic spunk," says Chelsea.

Max continues to patronize her and says he cares about her, not Phillip. "I worry about you."

Stephanie comes into the vestibule at St. Luke's and lights a candle, "Hey God, sorry I haven't been here in a while. Thank you for bringing Phillip into my life. I love him so much. More than anybody. I just want you to bring him peace."

God pounds his forehead, "AAK! I thought it was 'piece.' That's why I brought you together."

Chloe insists EJ couldn't ever fall for another one of Sami's lies. She tells her to focus on EJ and Sydney.

Nicole smiles, "You are a great shrink."

Chloe says, "That's because my brain's about as shrunk as they get." They agree to meet tonight at the rehearsal and part. Nicole coos at Sydney, picks her up and tells her she means the world to her, "No matter what I won't lose you." She promises everything will be OK.

Max and Chelsea arrive at her apartment. He sees the tool kit and the half-assembled bookcase sitting there, "What – are you trying to build an arc."

"No," says Chelsea, " I'm trying to build a boat." They smooch. Max brings things to a halt and decides he wants to finish her project. Chelsea says she wants to do it on her own. Max thinks this is about her having to prove herself.

"You think I'm inept," says Chelsea.

"You're good at other things," says Max.

"Like?"

"Like this..." Max moves in and they both forget about building arcs and boats.

Nicole and Monique talk about the wedding. Nicole tells her Sydney's nanny is coming to pick her up and wonders if Monique would do her a favor and wait outside with Sydney. Monique packs up the kid and leaves. This leaves Stephanie and Nicole alone. Stephanie thanks her for standing up for Phillip. Nicole says, "I just told the... uh... what do you call it? "

Truth." Stephanie wishes her well and thanks her again. They hug as EJ comes up, watches and stews.

Maggie tells Daniel there were a number of young women looking to date him at the last hospital charity auction, "Irene Ellis, that gorgeous physical therapist, for one. Don't deprive me of one of my greatest pleasures, matchmaking." Daniel resists. He says he will think about the young Irene. Maggie tells him to take care and leaves. Daniel rolls his eyes.

Maggie sits with Lucas. He tells her Chloe is at the church with Nicole, and says he's not looking forward to going to the wedding tomorrow, "I feel sorry for Nicole and that nightmare of a family."

"All of Nicole's husbands have been nightmares," says Maggie.

Lucas tells her Kate is worried about Phillip, and so is he, "Tony's death... I'm telling you, Maggie, that family better stay the hell away from my brother."

Stephanie walks up to her apartment door and swings it open to find Chelsea and Max knotted up together on the couch. Stephanie gasps and closes the door. Chelsea yells, "Just a minute."

Max and Chelsea straighten up inside, while Stephanie composes herself outside. She walks back through the door, "We can't keep doing this."

"No," says Chelsea, "we can't."

Chloe comes into the pub. She locks eyes with Daniel, and then joins Maggie and Lucas. Daniel sits and stares as they all chat.

Nicole tells EJ he seems far away. "I'm right here," says the ever observant EJ. He says he came to apologize but worries that she was embracing Stephanie. Nicole defends herself but EJ goes to the dark side.

Daniel broods as Chloe and Lucas plan a wedding party at Chez Rouge. Maggie talks with Chloe about finishing their Hearth and Home interview as she leaves. Chloe tells Lucas she is still nervous about all that. They smooch. Daniel simmers.

Chelsea tells Max she walked in on Stephanie and Phillip earlier. Stephanie announces Phillip will get his job back and stay with Victor, not in their apartment.

Chelsea asks, "So you're staying with Phillip? Are you nuts?"

Stephanie answers, "Does a one legged duck swim in circles?"

Lucas vows to take care of everything. Chloe gets a call, "Oh, hey, really? Are you serious? OMG! This is the best news ever except for finding out I'm not pregnant with Daniel's baby."

Nicole says she is sick of having to explain herself all the time, "I know you're mourning, but Tony..."

"Say it."

"It's insensitive and you're still grieving," says Nicole.

"Say it."

Nicole whines, "None of this would have happened if Tony hadn't gone rogue. Tony is the one who destroyed your family. He is the one who turned against you and your father. I get it that you want to blame Phillip, but don't blame this on me!"

Maggie and Daniel meet up at the hospital. "We have to stop meeting like this," says Maggie.

Daniel says she was right, "My life has become monastic bordering on masochistic." He's decided to have drinks with Irene. What a trooper!

Maggie squeals with delight and runs off, "I'll arrange it!"

Daniel shouts, "Ask Irene to wear her Mousketeer uniform."

Chloe finishes her phone conversation, "I will!" She hangs up and tells Lucas it was her agent. She was just offered the lead at the Vancouver Opera Company.

"Without an audition," asks Lucas.

"The VOC's standards are as low as DOOL casting," says Chloe.

Lucas whines, "Don't tell me you're thinking about accepting this."

Stephanie says she doesn't want Max talking about Phillip. Max tells her about hearing EJ talking about getting revenge. Stephanie thinks she can't abandon him at the time he needs her the most.

Max jumps right on that one, "You're done it before."

"You broke up with me, Max."

"I just want you to be happy," he yells.

Nicole says she is sick of all the talk about enemies and revenge. She asks what about her and Sydney, "Aren't we family too?"

"Technically, no."

Nicole whimpers, "For the last time – is this wedding on or not?"

EJ consults the Guy Manual, "STALL!"

"We just have to see what tomorrow brings," he says.

A little girl with curly hair walks onto the stage. Her dog follows. The girl breaks into song...

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