Comeuppance

Sami is on the phone with Alice, "Oh... I am SO SORRY about the mess the kids made, but that's one of the reasons I'm always pawning them off on you. I have no idea how you will get grape jello off your ceiling, but I'm sure you'll manage. Any chance you'd like to keep the little rats for another week or so, or maybe until they are in college? " Sami hangs up. Rafe comes in and suggests a picnic at his secret spot. Sami says she has her own secret spot they could go to, "You show me your secret spot and I'll show you mine."

Arianna tells Brady they need to get something straight.

Mags and Melanie are in her kitchen. Mia runs in as Maggie picks up a notebook. The outside is marked PRIVATE, so Maggie digs right in. she discovers it's full of short stories Mia has written. In the course of the next five seconds Maggie reads a few of them and tells Mia they are great, "These look like they were written by someone who has had a lot of experience." Translation: give me the juicy details.

Will comes into the Java Café. Chad asks about Mia and rehab. He says he never knew she had a drug problem.

Stefano assures Nicole she doesn't need to worry about Rafe and Sami, but does have to worry about Mia. Nicole says, "Don't worry. I can handle Mia." Chad certainly did.

EJ brings Sydney into the rumpus room and she attracts all the attention. EJ tells Nicole he ran into Mia. Stefano stares.

Arianna tells Brady she's nervous about things. It's Brady, in fact, that seems to make her nervous. "I'll have a protein shake," says Brady.

"With or without chowdah," asks Arianna.

Rafe tuns on the A/C as he and Sami start to leave. They have a totally inane discussion about whether it is more "green" to turn the A/C on now or when they get back. I think this is supposed to be one of those scenes where the mindless viewers get an object lesson in how to be green, but it's so stupid the lesson gets lost. Anyway, as Sami and Rafe start to walk out the door, we hear a weird buzzing sound.

EJ talks about meeting Mia and Will and tells Nicole how Will said he was a good father. He rambles on about Sami keeping Grace from him, "She'll eventually be punished... karma or whatever. She and Rafe... they'll have their day. They will." Nicole begs him to say something that makes sense.

Arianna serves Brady's shake. He thinks she's giving him mixed signals. Arianna sits, "I'm sorry for confusing you."

"It happens to me a lot," says Brady.

Arianna says, "I can be a little..."

"Confusing?"

Arianna has a rare thought, "I have an idea... How about we start over?"

They re-introduce themselves and then Arianna goes back to work. When she gets back to the bar she asks herself, "What's wrong with you? He's a good guy. Let it go." As we have already established, Arianna can be a little confusing.

Mia gives Maggie permission to read the rest of her story. Maggie says she thinks Mia has sensitivity and insight. She pries into Mia's life to try to figure why she has so much experience. She suggests Mia start a journal for therapy. If she does that, she will need one of those old diaries with a lock on it. In fact with Maggie around, she will need to double-padlock it.

Chad insists Mia never did drugs. Will wonders if Chad really knew her well. "Mia and I were THE couple," says Chad, "We were never apart. Looks like you don't know her as well as you think."

The ever articulate Will gives Chad his most intelligent comeback, "Go to hell."

Back at Sami's apartment the dynamic duo has discovered the air conditioner is on the fritz. "Don't worry," says Rafe, "I'll fix it."

Handyman Rafe checks the 'Home Repairs' section of the Guy Manual, which has detailed instructions for fixing an air conditioner, "Step 1: Remove your shirt. This won't help fix the air conditioner, but it will distract the woman you are with and she won't notice what a klutz you are." Studly Rafe follows instructions, proceeds to remove his shirt and flex the pecs.

Sami gets a little nervous, "Have you ever done this?"

"No," says Rafe, "but I once repaired a '68 Cyclone GT. That was one hell of a motorcycle." Sami begins to get nervous.

EJ gets a call and leaves. Stefano brings up Mia and Nicole tells him she has Mia under control, "It's Rafe I'm worried about."

Stefano assures her Sami and Rafe will get theirs soon, "The wheels are in motion."

"Not if it was a '68 Cyclone GT Rafe tried to fix," says Nicole.

Stefano says, "Sami will never know her child is here with us. I am on your side, always."

Nicole is grateful, "Thank you."

True to DOOL form, EJ walks in at that critical moment, "Thank you for what?"

Will's friend 'T-Man' invites him for a swim. The 'W-Man' wonders if any of the kids from Salem West are going. He asks if 'T-Man' thinks it's weird Mia won't talk about her past. 'T-Man' figures if 'W-Man' hangs out with Salem West kids he might find out. Will doesn't want Mia to think he's checking up on her.

"But that's exactly what you are doing," says 'T-man.'

Will makes a decision, "She has a right to privacy. I think I know everything I need to know."

Chad harasses Mia inside the Java Café, "I found out something about you after we broke up. Now I know why you suddenly had to leave school." Calm, cool and collected Mia drops the glass she is holding.

Stefano tells EJ he and Nicole were talking about a trust fund for Sydney and she thanked him. Nicole invites EJ to go with her and Sydney to the park. EJ declines and Nicole hauls Sydney off. EJ shuts the door and asks what's going on, "Something is amiss."

Stefano chuckles, "Amiss? You sound so Shakespearean"

"That's as close as any good writer will ever get to having anything to do with this show," says EJ, "But I know Sydney already has a trust fund and Nicole knows about it. I want to know what else is up."

Brady gets up to go and refuses to let Arianna give him the protein shake on the house. Arianna tells him she's serious about wanting to start over. "You want to test those feelings," asks Brady. He moves in, "Test them with this." Brady plants a hot kiss. The protein shake may not have been on the house, but it included a little free dessert.

Back at Sami's place, we have the standard DOOL ladder scene. Rafe has taken the ladder up into the ceiling, where he's working on the A/C, "Hey," he shouts, "It looks like this A/C isn't powered by a '68 Cyclone GT, so maybe I can fix it after all."

OK, you can either watch the rest of this scene, or you can drag out the video of Bo and the ladder from last Christmas. From this point on, it's the exact same scenario.

Sami shouts back up at him, "I'm going for iced tea."

As Sami scoots off, Rafe shouts, "Hold the ladder. I'm coming down."

CRASH!

Chad confronts Mia about drugs. "So that's what you're talking about," says Mia.

"What else would I be talking about," asks Chad.

Stefano tells EJ, "Nicole and I have teamed up because of your daughter."

Mia tells Chad she got caught up in the wrong scene and got mixed up in drugs, even though she wouldn't touch the stuff when he was around. She reminds him he never called when he was in reform school. Chad notices she's bleeding. She says she got cut on one of the pieces of glass she picked up. Chad takes her hand as Will comes in.

Nicole sits outside the pub and sees Brady and Arianna kissing.

Brady finishes up, tells Arianna not to say anything and leaves. Arianna turns and the other waitress smiles at her.

Outside, Brady finds Nicole. "You seem a little tense," says Nicole.

"Why would I be tense?"

"I don't know," she says, "Maybe I should ask Arianna."

Stefano says this is about Grace, not Sydney. He says Nicole and he have seen the suffering EJ is feeling and they are concerned it is tearing him apart, "You need to get Samantha out of your head."

EJ protests, "But then it would be completely empty."

"Soon," promises Stefano, "Samantha will have her comeuppance and then she will never torment you again."

Sami panics as Rafe struggles to get up. Blithering Sami apologizes for not holding the ladder, but Rafe tells her he's had worse falls. Too late. Sami has already crossed the line and goes into total meltdown, "I – sob – can't – babble – ever – snot – lose – snivel – you. I – sob – can't." Rafe begins to realize Sami isn't just screwed up, but is what is known in technical psychiatric jargon as a "compleat mental hose job."

Mia tells Will she cut her hand picking up the pieces. She leaves and Chad and Will trade insults. Mia comes back and says the boss gave her the rest of the day off, "It was either that, or we'd introduce a new flavor... hemoglobin latte."

"That's pretty cool," says Will, "You've already got your one-year service pin and haven't worked a full day yet." Will offers to take her home but Mia declines and leaves.

Chad takes a shot, "Sorry dude she's just not that into you."

Nicole says she just has a vibe about Arianna. Brady leaves. Nicole watches Arianna inside but Sydney squeals and distracts her. Nicole goes into the pub and finds Arianna. She orders an iced tea and sits down. Arianna brings it and Nicole strikes up a conversation. She asks if Rafe comes by a lot and wonders if he and Arianna are close. Arianna says she doesn't discuss her brother with anyone, "Especially someone who has it in for him."

Rafe assures the basket case formerly known as Sami he's not going anywhere. Proving she's an even bigger mental mess than we all thought, Sami freaks out about her tendency to freak out, "I just want this awful feeling to go away, when does it end."

Out in the audience, Beulah turns to her friend Maude, "You don't know how many times I've asked myself that same question."

Sami wants to know how Rafe got through his grief for Emily. "I just got through it," he says, "And I thank God every day I found you and I found love."

Nicole leaves as Arianna stares. Melanie comes in and says she got Arianna's message. Arianna hits her like a ton of bricks, "Stay out of my life. Just back the hell off."

Maggie finds Brady out by the park bench. She senses he's not in a good mood and pries. Brady says he took Maggie's advice at first. He put the brakes on his relationship with Arianna, but then sought her out, "I won't let it happen, he says, "I can't."

Will tells Chad to back off Mia. He leaves. Chad mumbles, "Willie boy might be buying Mia's rehab story but I'm not. What's going on with you Mia?"

Mia types into her journal, "Now people think I was into drugs, but I guess that's better than them knowing I was pregnant. It wouldn't take them long to figure out who was the father."

Sami says, "I was thinking."

"It's amazing you could think at all during that mental train wreck you just had," says Rafe. Sami tells him they are running out of time before the dreaded return of the kids, so she suggests she run her errands and then they can meet at the secret spot, "Thanks for helping me through another meltdown."

"That's just getting to be a part of my daily routine," says Rafe."I got your back. Just like you had mine when I was fixing the A/C"

Sami smacks him, "That's not fair." Reality sets in, "But it's true." Rafe leaves to take a shower and Sami sits down and writes directions to the secret spot.

Nicole comes back into the rumpus room. She gushes about Sydney but EJ zones out, "Father told me you have been keeping things from me."

Nicole panics, "Before you say a word, please let me explain."

Arianna wants to know why Melanie talked to Brady again, "Brady and I are not going to happen." A phone call interrupts. Arianna says, "OK, I'll make it happen." She hangs up.

Melanie asks, "What was that about? This is what is keeping you from Brady, right?" Arianna denies. Melanie says, "I'm an expert at sniffing out lies and you just told a whopper." She leaves.

Arianna zones, "You're right. I did."

Melanie flunked her first nursing exam when she answered, "A fibula is a small lie."

EJ stops Nicole, "Father told me how worried you have been about me since Grace died. Your concern touches me, but you shouldn't keep secrets. In the end these things come out one way or the other."

Rafe comes into the living room and reads the directions Sami has left so he can get to the secret spot, "Oh, no, not there!"

Sami arrives at the secret spot. She sets things up, but stops when she looks through the bushes and sees a woman crying. The woman wails,

"EEEEMMMMMIIIILLLYYYY!"

"It's disgusting," says Sami, "The way some unbalanced bimbos can't control their emotions."

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