If My Nose Is A-Drippin' I'll Use My Sleeve

Old Man Brady pines over the girl with the golden hair. He wonders why she is coming back to haunt him now.

Lucas thinks his magic fingers are the accompaniment to Santo DiMera's stupid letters. "They aren't stupid," insists Sami, "The letters, that is. Too bad I can't say the same thing for your fingers."

Lucas agrees, "OK, they're romantic and sad. Now get to the sex part."

Sami laughs, "You dog. Reading the letters is getting me in the mood."

Lucas says, "Oh, in that case, please continue."

Santo writes, "My dearest Colleen, from the moment I awoke and saw your radiant face above me, you have been in my thoughts. How I tried to put you and that moment from my mind, but then this morning a letter arrived written in Italian. I heard your voice calling me and I couldn't help but head straight back to the church.

Santo finds Father Mallory in the church. Man, email doesn't travel as fast as letters must have back then. Father Mallory thinks Santo wants the handkerchief. Santo comes clean. He isn't interested in the handkerchief, but came back to see the young novice. Well, too bad. She isn't there. Her da is ailing, but father Mallory will tell her Santo came sniffing by.

Julie reads on, "I've haunted your church many days since, Colleen, but not once have I seen you there – even a glimpse. I'm starting to wonder if I misunderstood what you wrote to me." They all speculate about what was going through Colleen's mind. They figure she lived in a small community where everyone knew everyone; Colleen had committed her life to God. Bo wishes he could go back and warn her. Hope thinks OMB is probably thinking the same thing.

Sami thinks everyone plays games. That gets Lucas motor running. He wants to play games. Sami "Stop – We can't do this" Brady shoves him away and reminds him they have played more games and had more plots than the entire season of Heroes. That gets Lucas motor running, "We aren't going to play any more games, are we, Mrs. Roberts?" Frigid Sami backs off. She can't help but think about Santo. A cockroach scurries across the floor. That gets Lucas motor running.

Sami reads on, "Yes, I began to doubt what I thought I read in the letter beyond the actual words, Colleen, and began to believe I might have been wrong. What I thought I saw in your eyes had never been there at all."

Father Mallory once again finds Santo in the church and once again tries to give him the brush off. Santo tells him Colleen asked him to bring her something from Italy. The Father reminds him Colleen has given up all worldly goods. Santo says it is for her father.

"Speakin' of me are ya then? Well I'm right here in the church wit'cha," says a voice, "I'm Colleen's da. And who mi-chew be? What's that you got for me then?"

Bo has an epiphany, "Hold on Julie, that old geezer he's writing about is old grandpa Pete – Pete Brady." Apparently old Pete was a tough old bird; as tough as they come. He was a hod carrier. He'd go out in the bogs, cut peat and carry it to a market in Galway. Bo informs us peat porter Pete did that because they burned peat instead of wood. There was no wood in Ireland, except for Shawn Sr.'s head. They speculate that the boy with Peter the Geezer was Shawn Sr. Hope thinks OMB, well – YMB, saw everything between Colleen and Santo.

Caroline finds Shawn downstairs and wonders what he is doing down there. He claims he is working on the books. She tells him there is plenty of time to do the books later. Well, OMB, just isn't in the mood for that, "Don't tell me there is plenty of time. I'll do the books now." Caroline gives up and leaves.

OMB sits down at a booth and looks at the picture of Colleen, "Colleen Mary, I pray that you've found peace, and that you've forgiven me."

Old Pete, actually looking pretty young, wants to know what Santo has for him. Santo hauls out the handkerchief and says Colleen wanted to purchase it for him. Pete insists he would never use anything like that. He blows his nose and hands it back to Santo as the little kid with him runs out of the sanctuary.

Pete wonders how much Santo was going to charge Colleen for the handkerchief. Santo pulls the bill out of his pocket and hands it to Pete. Pete gets sticker shock, "It's more than a week's wages. You took advantage of my Colleen and it's you that's gonna be a-payin' for that surenuff." He rolls up his sleeves. Santo stares.

Julie thinks it's amazing. Santo and Colleen had only met once, and already there was trouble between the DiMeras and the Bradys. "Natural enemies," says Doug, "Like cats and dogs... or DOOL writers and intelligence."

John wonders if that was the exact moment the feud started. Marlena says at that time it was only a one-way war. Doug thinks maybe it was grandpa Pete who threw the first punch. After about an hour of speculation, they finally figure out they could read the letter and find out what happened.

Julie reads on, "In my soul, dear Colleen, I know you believe as I do, that the Lord works in mysterious ways. Why was I injured that day in my village? Why, when I thought I might have breathed my last, did the Lord bring you into my life? Why do I see divine purpose in our meeting? Help me understand His will for us. His will – that brought me face-to-face with a novice's angry father, in that little Irish church."

Father Mallory holds Pete back as Santo swears Colleen asked him for the handkerchief. "So I could wipe my nose in a week's wages," asks Pete, "If my nose is a-drippin' I'll use my sleeve." Pete goes off the deep end, "Put up yer hands ye skinny beanpole!"

"I have to say," says Sami, "I love this guy Pete." Lucas grumbles. He thinks old Pete sounds like a nut-job. Sami insists Lucas would take care of his daughter just the same. She hops on the bed and holds her tummy, "One of these twins is a little girl and you will take care of her just like you take care of me. The one thing I'm sure of in this crazy world is that you will be there for us." Sami says she would attack him if there wasn't a whole squad of cops outside. That gets Lucas motor running. He doesn't think she should fight the urge. Sami does what she does best and backs off.

She reads on, "The Lord was with me that day, Colleen. I could see there was no way to avoid a fight with your father. Just as I was about to suggest we take things out of the sanctuary, you showed up with your brother Shawn and he showed more sense than any of us adults." Sami pauses, "OMG! Santo is writing about Grandpa Shawn!"

"That can't be," says Lucas, "The letter says he had some sense."

Father Mallory tries to break things up. Pete screams, "Save it, Father! The Almighty himself couldn't stop me!"

Colleen rushes in dragging Shawn, "Stop it right now. You leave Mr. DiMera alone or you'll answer to me!"

Colleen and Pete argue about whether or not he should beat the crap out of Santo. She turns the tables on him by asking his forgiveness for disappointing him by wanting something nice for him. She says she wants a word with Santo in private. Pete walks out with his tail between his legs, dragging Shawn. He stops when he gets to Santo, "Just let it be known, I don't like the looks of you... and never will."

Colleen apologizes for her dad's temper, but Santo stops her.

Sami stops reading and asks Lucas if he believes in fate. "Of course I do," says Lucas, "I spent half my life not wanting anything to do with you, half wanting you so bad I couldn't see straight, and the other half playing practical jokes. Now here we are lying in bed together gettin' all cozy." He wants her to read on and see if Colleen renounces her vows for the evils of the world.

"You mean for romance," says Sami. At this point, Lucas will agree to anything.

Santo tells Colleen he has been to the church many times but Father Mallory always made excuses. He thinks Colleen asked him to do that. Colleen remains silent. "I thought so," says Santo, "Tell me, why do I frighten you so much?"

OMB scrawls out a letter, "Darling Caroline, keep an eye on things here for a few days. I shouldn't be gone long, so don't worry your beautiful self over me. I know you will anyway, but I'll be fine. And I am fine, and I love you with all my heart."

Caroline walks in and asks him if he is still working on the books, "What are you up to?"

Shawn looks at his packed suitcase across the room, "Nuthin'."

Caroline wonders if something is wrong. Shawn says he is about to come to bed, but has to finish the beer orders. Beer orders are OMB's top priority. As Caroline heads back to bed, OMB tells her not to worry. He leaves the note propped up with her name on it, turns out the lights and hyperventilates.

Colleen insists she isn't frightened of Santo. She's just attracted to his handkerchiefs. She starts to pay him, but he says he wants her to accept it as a gift. She just can't possibly let him do that. "From you," says Santo, "I can't take money."

"I'm so near to takin' me vows, it wouldn'a be right."

"To refuse a small gift given freely," says Santo, "Also wouldn't be right. Please, it is a leetle gesture of gratitude for your great kindness to me." She tells him she just can't accept it and hands it back to him.

He asks her to go on a picnic with him tomorrow, "Even nuns must eat."

"The married Italian and the Irish nun," says Lucas, "It sounds like the start of a bad joke."

"No," says Sami, "Just bad drama."

"He's gonna ask her out on a date," says Lucas, "And she's gonna accept. He's gonna do the hook, the line and the sinker and reel her in all wide-eyed and gaspin' for air."

Sami makes a face, "Nice visual – thanks."

Lucas comes up with a great observation, "Hey, the guy's a guy."

"Then why did he tell her about his wife and kid," asks Sami.

Lucas admits, that's totally against the guy-code, "I guess he is being honest."

"Which is pretty unusual," says Sami, "if all the guy wants is to get under her skirt."

"Oooooo," says Lucas, "Now who's being cynical?"

"Think about it," says Sami, "Maybe you have it backwards. Maybe it's Colleen who has the rod and reel. Maybe she wants to get under his skirt. You're not giving Colleen enough credit. She took a long look at Santo and knew exactly what she wanted."

Colleen turns down the picnic, "I just couldn't. I've given my hort to the Lard in this chorch. And you've given yours also – in marriage." Santo just wants a ham sandwich, not a proposal. Colleen just can't share the wicked ways of the world with him. He calls her name as she runs out.

Julie reads, "I believe that we will regret for all the Days Of Our Lives, that you would not share a small bottle of wine with me. Know that I will never stop praying that one day, in some blessed hour, our paths will cross again. God did not bring us together to be torn apart so soon."

John points out they already know Colleen and Santo found a way to get together again. "So tune in tomorrow," says Doug, "Unless that Wimbledon thing is still on."

"I can't wait to see what happens next," says Marlena.

"When I get you home I'll give you a little clue," says John.

"It's little all right," says Marlena.

So they sum up what they know. Santo was trying to develop a market with the fine people of Ireland. "And one of those peeps," says Bo, "was my father's father, who knew right from the beginning not to trust a DiMera." John thinks it's pretty clear Shawn knows more than he's telling them. "He's got his secrets," says Bo, "But then again who doesn't?"

"Maggie," says John, "She can't keep her mouth shut around anyone."

Bo thinks Shawn has a right to his privacy. Hope thinks he's just saying that because he knows OMB isn't going to talk. "I don't think he has to," says Bo, "I think before long, we're going to figure this thing out on our own."

Lucas can't believe that's the end of it, "Mediterranean dudes don't give up that easy." Sami says there are more letters to come and they must have met at some point. "And that's when the trouble started." Lucas wants to start some trouble of his own. He takes Sami in for a hot shower.

Santo folds the handkerchief over the top of the back pew and leaves. Colleen runs through the sanctuary and peeks out the door. When she goes back in, she discovers the hanky. She picks it up and cradles it. Father Moneybags comes in and sees it. He thinks she is bold to ask Santo for such a precious thing, which might bring enough money for a new baptismal font. Colleen hesitates. "I know whatcher thinkin' – bread for the poor." He grabs it from her. Colleen asks for some time off tomorrow to go help the orphans.

"Please," says the Father, "Not another raffle or more bingo. Just keep hauling in the handkerchiefs."

"No, father," she says, "But I was-a-thinkin' – there's a new stranger here who may be wantin' to build up his business and be-a-provin' he has a heart as big as his fancy purse. And you yerself said the Lard works in mysterious ways, doesn't he?"

The Father is so understanding, "If yer-a believin' the hand of the Lord may be slippin' it's way into somebody's pocket to help with our business, I suppose I could be havin' a word with the Mother Superior about an hour away from yer duties."

"God bless ya, Father."

"And God bless the orphans. And you too." Father Mallory leaves to go count his handkerchiefs.

OMB looks at Colleen's picture, "Oh... I'll be there soon, Colleen Mary. I'm on my way and maybe the good Lord will finally let us put the past in the past – put it all to rest once and for all." He takes one last look at the pub and walks out the door. Pan to his note.


Previews
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